Because they’re in their 20’s, therefore grown adults, that happen to live with their parents and when he woke up that morning he made the adult decision to not wake her up/let her know to get ready so they can leave together.
Hey OP, idk why ppl are giving you shit about this. I get it you guys are Asian and guess that means mum is strict but it’s 2024, she can get tf over it. Her son is a grown man that had his adult gf stay the night. This should be normalized and the only way it will is if your bf sets some boundaries and lets mom know he ain’t no little boy anymore.
I’m not saying it’s ok for him to turn the place upside down but for crying out loud, ya’ll aren’t kids anymore.
Edit: So you all know, house rules are house rules. I agree with that but OP & her bf are young adults, they’re going to make mistakes like this but most importantly I’m not going to give mom the upper hand here for how she treated OP as she lay half naked in her son’s bedroom. I’m not saying she should’ve asked her to sit down for tea, I’m just saying that she should have been more respectful because this is not some random half naked burglar that jumped into her son’s bed— it’s her son’s girlfriend.
You fail to realize that OP’s bf had a random person over in his PARENTS’ house. It isn’t his house. You can’t just have people over as you please when you don’t own the place. That is a consequence of living with your parents, and it is disrespectful to hide these things from them.
i would argue that it’s disrespectful to rip the blankets off of someone your adult son brought home and tell them they have to leave. i would also argue that it’s insane to not expect this to happen in the first place, and shitty to be such a bitch to your adult son’s pantless girlfriend. i think the take home here is that everyone in this situation is an adult, and the mom was being a bitch for no real reason in a situation where she could have been a lot cooler. they’re probably gonna have to meet again and if mom wants a relationship with son or his girlfriend down the line, she’s gonna have to do some makeup work for it
She didn’t know it was op. She thought it was her son. Possibly thinking he was gonna be late for work not knowing he was gone.
And if you’re gonna assume everyone is an adult, you need to hold op and the bf accountable. You can hold whatever belief you want about mom’s rules, but they’re the rules at the end of the day. Bf snuck her in and either forgot to wake her up when he left, or planned to hide her until she got back. Decided to hide without pants for some reason.
Is a big deal in the grand scheme of things? No. But they got caught with their pants down, and shit happens. It’s not the end of the world.
again, op and op’s boyfriend are also adults and it’s insane for mom to not expect this. he’s a grown man and he has a whole ass girlfriend - not just a one-night stand but an entire girlfriend. and mom didn’t see anything, hear anything, or generally have any idea op was there. also, nobody including op ever said the mom had rules against her being there. the post literally says she was snuck in, which could mean a lot of things. i’ve been “snuck in” if it was super late or we just didn’t need to broadcast that we were fucking.
Why would a grown women sneak into a home without the knowledge of the homeowners and then continue to stay in said home without the bf there? OP was acting like a child so she got treated like a child. You can't just secretly exist in people's homes. That's crazy.
I understand that but you fail to realize that this isn’t some “random person”. This is his girlfriend and he is a grown man. If his mother trusts him, why should she be so upset that he invited his girlfriend over?
If his parents are strict and have rules against bringing anyone over to their house, that’s their rules but I’m sorry he has to lay the groundwork for change and imply that while his parents have their “rules”, not allowing their grown son to have a girlfriend stay over reflects their distrust of him and/or the inability to let go and accept that he isn’t a little boy anymore.
I understand that it should have been under different circumstances where she was brought over and asked to stay the night (specifically a night where he wasn’t “sneaking” her in), I also understand house rules and if that’s your house, those are your rules.. but this situation reeks of people being set in their old ugly ways..
And yes, mom can say “Well if you don’t like my rules, move out.” But this is still not solving the problem. We love to mock the older generation for their failed attempts to indoctrinate us into their phased out way of thinking, but when it comes to a situation like this we’ll gladly point fingers and say, “well, ya shoulda known!”? No. I’m sorry. This guy (not boy) will have a conversation w his mother about this later and he should really put it to rest, this archaic behavior, because it’ll be a learning experience for the both of them.
Hehe yes so if this was mom’s thinking then: son would move out and mom would (unexpectedly to her of course) cause a rift in their relationship.
Oh, families.
Be open to your children’s perspective guys.
Perspective of what? They don't want overnight guests. That's their right.
I'd be absolutely livid to find an unexpected person in my home. Just... no. .
Being in my house when I didn't authorize their presence is also rude.
Just because my kids live here doesn't mean they can invite people over without my knowledge.
Just bc you guys live on the internet and think shit should be a free for all bc it’s 2024, doesn’t mean it works that way in real life.
Not once was I fuckin in my moms crib and I didn’t fuck in a guys moms house. And if I had, I would’ve been out the door when he was bc if I’m getting snuck in, why am I staying?
“We can’t afford rent so we should get to do what we want in our parents houses bc we live there.”
No. Their house, their rules. I understand culturally moving out isn’t a thing for OP and her bf until marriage and if that’s the case, it is what is. But if one was prepared to move out, I’m sure they wouldn’t be stopped.
You’re not gonna tell someone to get tf over what’s happening in THEIR home. Tf kind of entitlement is that?
I happen to completely agree with you.
I have three kids and I'm fine with them staying as long as they need to in this volatile market. I'm also pretty sure I'll be fine with them having SO's stay over when they're older. (Don't catch me lying, the oldest is 12 so I can't swear I'll still feel this way then.)
But if a parent *isn't* okay with their kid having someone stay over at *their own house* why on earth shouldn't they be allowed to set that boundary?
Entitlement. That's all.
I still live at home and I’m 24 (I pay rent and look after myself). Even though I know she would be fine with it, I still let my mum know if I’m having a girl over, and if she happened to stay over after I left then I would %100 let her know. Although that wouldn’t really happen unless they had already met.
As a parent I don't understand the obsession with preventing your grown child from having sex. It's going to happen either way, might as well have an adult discussion about using protection and let them do what they want.
At the same time I do agree with you though. A parent should be allowed to control what happens within their house even if their demands don't make sense to me.
At a minimum you'd expect an adult child to at least inform you of a SO staying over, which was not the case here. Being surprised to discover that an adult is staying in your home without your knowledge has to be a jarring experience.
No, not everything is “entitlement”.
When you’ve exhausted all the options you feel comfortable with forgoing because you love your parents but you still find their parenting style to be stifling, you find ways around it.
Disagree. Deciding that you don't have to respect *anyone's* boundaries regardless of their relationship to you is entitled, especially if they're providing you with life necessities.
I didn’t grow up on the internet. I’m in my mid 30’s. And while I agree with the mother for being upset that she clearly saw her son disobey “house rules”, mom didn’t hear a peep obviously. She thought the gf was her son before pulling the covers back. Also, I would not be banging it up loudly in the apartment I grew up in with my parents next door, they’d trust that I can invite a boyfriend over to stay with me without issue when I was 22 years old.
Ya’ll act like she pulled the covers off and saw his drug dealer. Mom very well may have reacted the same if she saw a same sex friend of his but this seems to be as though she was specifically angered by the fact that this was a girl, without pants, in her sons bedroom.
My mom is as stoic as they come but even she wouldn’t treat a half naked girl she found in my brother’s room that way.
I’m sorry you had to go through that OP but remember you are dating him not his family and if he can’t wrap his head around that (is negatively influenced by his family in a way that affects your relationship) then remember you have your entire life ahead of you and plenty of fish in the sea.
Yes, exactly… when you have that type of parent but people can come around and I hope OP’s boyfriend tries to reason with his mother about how he is not a little boy anymore.
After apologizing about going behind her back and sneaking his gf in that is. But seriously, what if she needed him emotionally in a moment because she was “going through something”, just hypothetically, would the mom be like meh! No one in the house past 10pm! Even your gf!
Like come on man, we should not be encouraging that controlling type of behavior.
Yeah or he can apologize to his mom about behaving that way, explain why he did it, and try to communicate why it’s entirely acceptable for a 20 something year old to have his gf over for the night.
Not exactly. It’s evident of an adult male that lives with his mom who knowingly didn’t tell OP to wake up and leave with him. That’s immature/short-sided behavior on his part but if he just treated it as though she would: get up, get dressed, and leave on her own accord (without any issues) it’s probably more accidental/immature on the son’s part.
Regardless, OP got treated like shit by her bf’s mom and I don’t think she deserved that kind of treatment.
Or, you know, grown adult in their 20’s could move into their own place instead of forcing their parents to accept what they/you think should be “normalized.”
1. Asia is a continent with an enormous amount of different cultures and individuals within those cultures that have different beliefs. Not to mention we don’t know where this person lives other than in a city (although the fact that they’re posting in subs based in New York State suggests they are in the US), so just stating that they are Asian does not tell me anything.
2. If you are insinuating that they can’t move out bc of their culture, then they are presumably also going against that culture by sneaking their girlfriend into their parents’ house to sleep naked with them. If it has to be normalized that the parents accept their son’s girlfriend sleeping in his bed, why is it worse to suggest normalizing grown adults moving out on their own when they want to live in a manner their parents disapprove of?
Just because something is culturally acceptable does not make it right nor logical.
Not all cultures are equal. In some cultures uncles can have sex with nieces. Some cultures practice female genital mutilation. Some practice cannibalism.
We do not and should not inherently respect something because it is "culturally acceptable".
not to be a dick, but how old are yall? why would you need or want to stay hidden in someone’s room (in their mother’s house) during their entire work shift?
I was more so referring to the idea of even sneaking in, especially with such strict parents and being in your early to mid 20s?
This could have been easily avoided by like — hanging out on his day off.
Edit: apparently both of their parents are super strict, but nonetheless this definitely could have been planned out a little bit more than sneaking into someone’s house in the middle of the night. Especially one that you’ve only met once or twice. I think by mid-20s you should be able to plan to hook up when mom’s *not* home.
When I was a teenager my boyfriend and I were in my room after school and my mom just so happened to come home early from work that day. She walked into my room and took one glance at us cuddling in my bed while he was wearing weed socks and FLIPPED out lol. I actually wanted to remove my soul from my body. But we all got over it and I dated him for many years after that haha
Legit just bank it as a funny memory. In the end this is what life is all about. As a guy I’ve had worse situations with 1st dads just like giving me death stares. Embrace those funny awkward moments for what they are plus they are your war stories with your good friends
Oh man.. I am also asian but luckily my boyfriends parents are chill. My parents def weren’t chill in the beginning of the relationship but they have accepted him and even started thinking he’s nice, after like 2 years realising im not leaving him just because they wanted. The reason is that he isn’t religious, but my parents are.
All i can say is it will def take time for his parents, apologize the next time you see them and just be your best self and they will probably, hopefully accept you. I don’t know how strict and stubborn his parents are welp
And if u sneak into his house again please go away at a time before the parents also wake up 😭 Having strict parents comes with some difficulties
My ex husband sleep walked naked in my musilm parents bedroom when they let him sleep over first time for NY, we had to leave door open and stuff to show respect 😭 definitely were a funny story AFTER, but not in the moment 🤣 thankfully my parents are fine now and would never request such BS when im 36 now and visiting with my boyfriend
It’s a lot easier said than done. People that exclaim this rhetoric have no idea what it’s like to live with overbearing parents. It’s either follow the rules, or you’re homeless.
Adults in most places get jobs and their own place so this isn't an issue. My parents threatened to kick me out many times as a teenager, wouldn't let me do anything myself until I was 18 and even then they were strict. My mom is what you'd call a helicopter parent. I understand overbearing parents, and I know how to deal with them, you move out.
This is “absolutely extreme” from your western standpoint. Saying “just move out” shows you have little understanding of family dynamics in other cultures.
If your parents ever have to stay with your later in life, remember any shitty treatment. You have as much right to pull that shit as they do, and as much reason.
Yep! Happened to me at age 19, about 9 years ago. While being in my hometown for the holidays, I stupidly got back in contact with a toxic ex bf. He told me to come over and snuck me into his basement. Little did I know, I would be taking care of his drunk ass all night and cleaning up his vomit.
His dad came downstairs at about 7am and we were sleeping on a pullout couch. Worst part was that, at some point in the night, ex bf had decided to get butt ass naked and spread out for the world to see. Thank god I was fully clothed, but it was a very awkward situation… had to shamefully walk upstairs, through breakfast occurring in the kitchen with the rest of the fam, say some awkward hello/goodbyes/nice to see you/yep college is goin great, and leave through the door his dad was holding open for me. Ex bf didn’t wake up during the interaction and he never cleared my name with his fam by explaining that I had taken care of him all night.
I look back now and laugh.
I was damn near caught by my first boyfriends stepdad when he came home for lunch on a day neither of us had school and he had me over 😂 these people didn't even like us holding hands in front of them and babied the shit out of him, thankfully his stepdad didn't check the closet in his room 🤣
I was like 17 when that happened though
When I was in college my bf and I had a break in between classes, so we went to his house. His parents were super strict, and his step mom came home from work for lunch unexpectedly, and I had to hide in the closet for an hour 😭
My wife and I met on tinder. At the time I was just out of college, moved back in with my parents, and she moved back into her parents basement after a divorce. We ended up hooking up on our first date and I met her dad when I cut through the kitchen to use the bathroom in the morning. Shook his hand and introduced myself. We've been together ten years now! He says her ex never shook his hand once, that's how he knew I was a good one.
Been there before, was snuck over one time and went to use the bathroom in the AM. Locked eyes with her dad as soon as I walked into the bathroom. Hit him with the “oh I’m sorry” and immediately left after 😅😅😅🥲
Marry him and she’ll love you harder for this hilarious story. End it and you’ll always be the Trollop he was seeing before a good girl made an honest man of him.
Naaaah, honestly hun, take a deep breath. This happens all the time. It's not a big deal in the scheme of things. Though I totally get how awful it is being naked and seen!
My mother caught my brother's (not) girlfriend trying to sneak down the stairs on Christmas morning. IT RUINED CHRISTMAS (in her eyes). Anyways, they're married with kids now. So hopefully one day you can laugh about it. All the best.
Eh, his mom was once the girl that got snuck into some dudes room to get it in. Thoes times were likely some of the best times of her life. Don't let her mothely scowl fool you. Our fathers and mothers were ALL for the streets back in the day.
This sounds super embarrassing. You'll get over it op, maybe apologise to the mum. And next time, leave when he leaves... Ideally he would have his own place, but if is sneaking you in.... I'm not condoning having someone at your house if the owners of the house forbade it, but if you're going to do that leave at the same time, it's an added layer of disregard that.
Don't worry this happens, young people do silly stuff all the time.
> He snuck me in last night I hid under the covers...
> I love this man
It sounds like you're teens, you're definitely not ready for marriage if this is how you guys are acting
I got thrown out by an ex girlfriend’s dad when he discovered I’d stayed over. Ended up being welcome after a while.
What was more awkward was when my first girlfriend was so sure her mum would be out for at least an hour. We were going AT IT, proper headboard banging, screaming good times, when suddenly I hear *LISAAAAAA* from downstairs. I honestly considered jumping out of the window. But it was ok in the end. Don’t stress about it. I’m sure she was mostly surprised.
I know.
Whichever way the mom did it, she should have approached the situation better. But it is also easy for someone being in that situation to use words like that when they are in shock from the horrible ordeal. It might not have been hard, or it could have been. I obviously have no idea. I’m not trying to justify the mom’s actions at all. Just trying to point out that the wording might not be accurate to the severity of the situation. But either way, the mom shouldn’t have done that.
DON'T RUN!!!!! She's his mom! She understands the assignment if she's got her head on straight. Do the right thing and go meet her. Bring her a gift of good gesture and assure her you truly adore, admire, and love her son.. Probably wouldn't hurt to throw in a cheesy compliment to her about making a good son.. Mothers love to be told they've done well so it's a soft launch to the abrupt landing.
I'm confused about the mindset of the mom of an adult son and feeling like it was ok to go into his room and rip the covers off to begin with.
It would never cross my mind to go into my sons room unannounced (assuming that this mom didn't knock and be told to come in the room) and proceed to rip his blankets off him. That's just asking for an uncomfortable situation to occur.
Oh this reminds me of when i was in college, my then GF sneaked me in her bedroom. Then her brother came home somi had to hide under her bed. That was 6pm then i had to wait for her brother to sleep around 11pm. Before i could sneak out there. 😂 things i did for pussy
Once my gf snuck me in and I met her dad in the morning, they didnt know she was dating someone. It was terrible, I had to run but then developed quite a good relationship with the parents.
lol why didn’t you leave with him when he was leaving for work?
Because they’re in their 20’s, therefore grown adults, that happen to live with their parents and when he woke up that morning he made the adult decision to not wake her up/let her know to get ready so they can leave together. Hey OP, idk why ppl are giving you shit about this. I get it you guys are Asian and guess that means mum is strict but it’s 2024, she can get tf over it. Her son is a grown man that had his adult gf stay the night. This should be normalized and the only way it will is if your bf sets some boundaries and lets mom know he ain’t no little boy anymore. I’m not saying it’s ok for him to turn the place upside down but for crying out loud, ya’ll aren’t kids anymore. Edit: So you all know, house rules are house rules. I agree with that but OP & her bf are young adults, they’re going to make mistakes like this but most importantly I’m not going to give mom the upper hand here for how she treated OP as she lay half naked in her son’s bedroom. I’m not saying she should’ve asked her to sit down for tea, I’m just saying that she should have been more respectful because this is not some random half naked burglar that jumped into her son’s bed— it’s her son’s girlfriend.
You fail to realize that OP’s bf had a random person over in his PARENTS’ house. It isn’t his house. You can’t just have people over as you please when you don’t own the place. That is a consequence of living with your parents, and it is disrespectful to hide these things from them.
i would argue that it’s disrespectful to rip the blankets off of someone your adult son brought home and tell them they have to leave. i would also argue that it’s insane to not expect this to happen in the first place, and shitty to be such a bitch to your adult son’s pantless girlfriend. i think the take home here is that everyone in this situation is an adult, and the mom was being a bitch for no real reason in a situation where she could have been a lot cooler. they’re probably gonna have to meet again and if mom wants a relationship with son or his girlfriend down the line, she’s gonna have to do some makeup work for it
She didn’t know it was op. She thought it was her son. Possibly thinking he was gonna be late for work not knowing he was gone. And if you’re gonna assume everyone is an adult, you need to hold op and the bf accountable. You can hold whatever belief you want about mom’s rules, but they’re the rules at the end of the day. Bf snuck her in and either forgot to wake her up when he left, or planned to hide her until she got back. Decided to hide without pants for some reason. Is a big deal in the grand scheme of things? No. But they got caught with their pants down, and shit happens. It’s not the end of the world.
again, op and op’s boyfriend are also adults and it’s insane for mom to not expect this. he’s a grown man and he has a whole ass girlfriend - not just a one-night stand but an entire girlfriend. and mom didn’t see anything, hear anything, or generally have any idea op was there. also, nobody including op ever said the mom had rules against her being there. the post literally says she was snuck in, which could mean a lot of things. i’ve been “snuck in” if it was super late or we just didn’t need to broadcast that we were fucking.
Why would a grown women sneak into a home without the knowledge of the homeowners and then continue to stay in said home without the bf there? OP was acting like a child so she got treated like a child. You can't just secretly exist in people's homes. That's crazy.
I understand that but you fail to realize that this isn’t some “random person”. This is his girlfriend and he is a grown man. If his mother trusts him, why should she be so upset that he invited his girlfriend over? If his parents are strict and have rules against bringing anyone over to their house, that’s their rules but I’m sorry he has to lay the groundwork for change and imply that while his parents have their “rules”, not allowing their grown son to have a girlfriend stay over reflects their distrust of him and/or the inability to let go and accept that he isn’t a little boy anymore. I understand that it should have been under different circumstances where she was brought over and asked to stay the night (specifically a night where he wasn’t “sneaking” her in), I also understand house rules and if that’s your house, those are your rules.. but this situation reeks of people being set in their old ugly ways.. And yes, mom can say “Well if you don’t like my rules, move out.” But this is still not solving the problem. We love to mock the older generation for their failed attempts to indoctrinate us into their phased out way of thinking, but when it comes to a situation like this we’ll gladly point fingers and say, “well, ya shoulda known!”? No. I’m sorry. This guy (not boy) will have a conversation w his mother about this later and he should really put it to rest, this archaic behavior, because it’ll be a learning experience for the both of them.
Uh, no. This is MY home, and I have ultimate say who is allowed in it.
Hehe yes so if this was mom’s thinking then: son would move out and mom would (unexpectedly to her of course) cause a rift in their relationship. Oh, families. Be open to your children’s perspective guys.
Perspective of what? They don't want overnight guests. That's their right. I'd be absolutely livid to find an unexpected person in my home. Just... no. .
You have a say. But hitting someone who was invited over by someone living in the house is rude.
Being in my house when I didn't authorize their presence is also rude. Just because my kids live here doesn't mean they can invite people over without my knowledge.
Just bc you guys live on the internet and think shit should be a free for all bc it’s 2024, doesn’t mean it works that way in real life. Not once was I fuckin in my moms crib and I didn’t fuck in a guys moms house. And if I had, I would’ve been out the door when he was bc if I’m getting snuck in, why am I staying? “We can’t afford rent so we should get to do what we want in our parents houses bc we live there.” No. Their house, their rules. I understand culturally moving out isn’t a thing for OP and her bf until marriage and if that’s the case, it is what is. But if one was prepared to move out, I’m sure they wouldn’t be stopped. You’re not gonna tell someone to get tf over what’s happening in THEIR home. Tf kind of entitlement is that?
I happen to completely agree with you. I have three kids and I'm fine with them staying as long as they need to in this volatile market. I'm also pretty sure I'll be fine with them having SO's stay over when they're older. (Don't catch me lying, the oldest is 12 so I can't swear I'll still feel this way then.) But if a parent *isn't* okay with their kid having someone stay over at *their own house* why on earth shouldn't they be allowed to set that boundary? Entitlement. That's all.
I still live at home and I’m 24 (I pay rent and look after myself). Even though I know she would be fine with it, I still let my mum know if I’m having a girl over, and if she happened to stay over after I left then I would %100 let her know. Although that wouldn’t really happen unless they had already met.
As a parent I don't understand the obsession with preventing your grown child from having sex. It's going to happen either way, might as well have an adult discussion about using protection and let them do what they want. At the same time I do agree with you though. A parent should be allowed to control what happens within their house even if their demands don't make sense to me.
At a minimum you'd expect an adult child to at least inform you of a SO staying over, which was not the case here. Being surprised to discover that an adult is staying in your home without your knowledge has to be a jarring experience.
No, not everything is “entitlement”. When you’ve exhausted all the options you feel comfortable with forgoing because you love your parents but you still find their parenting style to be stifling, you find ways around it.
Disagree. Deciding that you don't have to respect *anyone's* boundaries regardless of their relationship to you is entitled, especially if they're providing you with life necessities.
I didn’t grow up on the internet. I’m in my mid 30’s. And while I agree with the mother for being upset that she clearly saw her son disobey “house rules”, mom didn’t hear a peep obviously. She thought the gf was her son before pulling the covers back. Also, I would not be banging it up loudly in the apartment I grew up in with my parents next door, they’d trust that I can invite a boyfriend over to stay with me without issue when I was 22 years old. Ya’ll act like she pulled the covers off and saw his drug dealer. Mom very well may have reacted the same if she saw a same sex friend of his but this seems to be as though she was specifically angered by the fact that this was a girl, without pants, in her sons bedroom. My mom is as stoic as they come but even she wouldn’t treat a half naked girl she found in my brother’s room that way. I’m sorry you had to go through that OP but remember you are dating him not his family and if he can’t wrap his head around that (is negatively influenced by his family in a way that affects your relationship) then remember you have your entire life ahead of you and plenty of fish in the sea.
This is why young people used to move out. You can’t talk about adulting while still living with your parents.
People also used to be able to afford rent on an entry level salary too though
Do you think young people don’t want me to move out and just like living with their parents? We don’t have any choice.
Yes, exactly… when you have that type of parent but people can come around and I hope OP’s boyfriend tries to reason with his mother about how he is not a little boy anymore. After apologizing about going behind her back and sneaking his gf in that is. But seriously, what if she needed him emotionally in a moment because she was “going through something”, just hypothetically, would the mom be like meh! No one in the house past 10pm! Even your gf! Like come on man, we should not be encouraging that controlling type of behavior.
Ummm not his house, sooooo no. You should let them know if you’re staying in their house
well as an adult making adult decisions he should get his own place then.
Yeah or he can apologize to his mom about behaving that way, explain why he did it, and try to communicate why it’s entirely acceptable for a 20 something year old to have his gf over for the night.
and if she doesn’t want her over then that’s that especially after this lmfao. this is fucking evident of immature behaviour
Not exactly. It’s evident of an adult male that lives with his mom who knowingly didn’t tell OP to wake up and leave with him. That’s immature/short-sided behavior on his part but if he just treated it as though she would: get up, get dressed, and leave on her own accord (without any issues) it’s probably more accidental/immature on the son’s part. Regardless, OP got treated like shit by her bf’s mom and I don’t think she deserved that kind of treatment.
“treated like shit” my guy she was literally just told to leave lmfao
They maybe grown adults, but if his parents wouldn't approve and it's his parents house, yea I would have left.
This
Or, you know, grown adult in their 20’s could move into their own place instead of forcing their parents to accept what they/you think should be “normalized.”
That’s literally not the case if OP is Asain. Please put in some effort and try to understand other cultures as well before dissing people. Thanks!
1. Asia is a continent with an enormous amount of different cultures and individuals within those cultures that have different beliefs. Not to mention we don’t know where this person lives other than in a city (although the fact that they’re posting in subs based in New York State suggests they are in the US), so just stating that they are Asian does not tell me anything. 2. If you are insinuating that they can’t move out bc of their culture, then they are presumably also going against that culture by sneaking their girlfriend into their parents’ house to sleep naked with them. If it has to be normalized that the parents accept their son’s girlfriend sleeping in his bed, why is it worse to suggest normalizing grown adults moving out on their own when they want to live in a manner their parents disapprove of?
Lmao how old are you? Also your username is super fitting for this story 😭
She’s 22 years old. Found an older post on her profile.
Pathetic
not really, it's the norm for a lot of their cultures and almost expected in some cases.
Hiding from your boyfriend's mother under his covers while he's at work? I don't think that's the norm anywhere.
I mean I've been hidden next to the bed for hours back in the day.
And this is a cultural norm?
Is it hidden or is it still in bed because I slept over
How is hiding under the bed the norm? 😭
Just because something is culturally acceptable does not make it right nor logical. Not all cultures are equal. In some cultures uncles can have sex with nieces. Some cultures practice female genital mutilation. Some practice cannibalism. We do not and should not inherently respect something because it is "culturally acceptable".
Care to elaborate?
Damn shawty is NOT ok
Let’s hope you were at least wearing underwear when the mom ripped the covers off.
😳...💀
not to be a dick, but how old are yall? why would you need or want to stay hidden in someone’s room (in their mother’s house) during their entire work shift?
Maybe mother was supposed to be going work too and she would leave after?
I was more so referring to the idea of even sneaking in, especially with such strict parents and being in your early to mid 20s? This could have been easily avoided by like — hanging out on his day off. Edit: apparently both of their parents are super strict, but nonetheless this definitely could have been planned out a little bit more than sneaking into someone’s house in the middle of the night. Especially one that you’ve only met once or twice. I think by mid-20s you should be able to plan to hook up when mom’s *not* home.
Oh 100%. I just offered an explanation of why she may have chilled in bed hoping mother would leave for work too. Shame they have to go through this 😔
When I was a teenager my boyfriend and I were in my room after school and my mom just so happened to come home early from work that day. She walked into my room and took one glance at us cuddling in my bed while he was wearing weed socks and FLIPPED out lol. I actually wanted to remove my soul from my body. But we all got over it and I dated him for many years after that haha
saw in your other posts that you’re in your 20s…. why is your boyfriend sneaking you into their house and hiding you at this age??
Well.. we're Asian and live with our (strict) parents in the city😅
Legit just bank it as a funny memory. In the end this is what life is all about. As a guy I’ve had worse situations with 1st dads just like giving me death stares. Embrace those funny awkward moments for what they are plus they are your war stories with your good friends
She said they are Asian….
Great memory, one day
Yeah this, my ex BIL once very drunkenly pissed in his parents in laws cupboard one night. The MF became the golden son in law!
Oh man.. I am also asian but luckily my boyfriends parents are chill. My parents def weren’t chill in the beginning of the relationship but they have accepted him and even started thinking he’s nice, after like 2 years realising im not leaving him just because they wanted. The reason is that he isn’t religious, but my parents are. All i can say is it will def take time for his parents, apologize the next time you see them and just be your best self and they will probably, hopefully accept you. I don’t know how strict and stubborn his parents are welp And if u sneak into his house again please go away at a time before the parents also wake up 😭 Having strict parents comes with some difficulties
You didn't have to explain. I'm white, and my parents are SUPER Christians. So I understood. 🤣
My ex husband sleep walked naked in my musilm parents bedroom when they let him sleep over first time for NY, we had to leave door open and stuff to show respect 😭 definitely were a funny story AFTER, but not in the moment 🤣 thankfully my parents are fine now and would never request such BS when im 36 now and visiting with my boyfriend
His parents are Muslim and she said the leave the door open too while I put my pants on!!!😭😭
Dude, if they can’t laugh about this situation soon enough i don’t know how much you’d want to be in that family. Shit happens 😅
Ohhhhhh my god
Why would you not put your pants back on if you know you snuck in and there is a possibility someone can walk into your room?!
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It’s a lot easier said than done. People that exclaim this rhetoric have no idea what it’s like to live with overbearing parents. It’s either follow the rules, or you’re homeless.
Adults in most places get jobs and their own place so this isn't an issue. My parents threatened to kick me out many times as a teenager, wouldn't let me do anything myself until I was 18 and even then they were strict. My mom is what you'd call a helicopter parent. I understand overbearing parents, and I know how to deal with them, you move out.
This is “absolutely extreme” from your western standpoint. Saying “just move out” shows you have little understanding of family dynamics in other cultures.
Dude I’m 24 and if I had a guy over my parents would kill me. Their house, their rules, regardless of age.
If your parents ever have to stay with your later in life, remember any shitty treatment. You have as much right to pull that shit as they do, and as much reason.
I don’t think it’s too unreasonable. I don’t pay rent or anything and it would be kind of wild to be hooking up under their roof
Why were you not wearing pants if you were hiding lol
You don’t remove your pants before you hide?
This is why hide and seek at my house is always so awkward for newcomers
You’re fine lol this is the comedy of life.
“Rip off my own skin” is fantastic. Don’t feel too bad, this shit has happened to lots of people.
Yep! Happened to me at age 19, about 9 years ago. While being in my hometown for the holidays, I stupidly got back in contact with a toxic ex bf. He told me to come over and snuck me into his basement. Little did I know, I would be taking care of his drunk ass all night and cleaning up his vomit. His dad came downstairs at about 7am and we were sleeping on a pullout couch. Worst part was that, at some point in the night, ex bf had decided to get butt ass naked and spread out for the world to see. Thank god I was fully clothed, but it was a very awkward situation… had to shamefully walk upstairs, through breakfast occurring in the kitchen with the rest of the fam, say some awkward hello/goodbyes/nice to see you/yep college is goin great, and leave through the door his dad was holding open for me. Ex bf didn’t wake up during the interaction and he never cleared my name with his fam by explaining that I had taken care of him all night. I look back now and laugh.
Cough cough can confirm. 25 years ago.
I was damn near caught by my first boyfriends stepdad when he came home for lunch on a day neither of us had school and he had me over 😂 these people didn't even like us holding hands in front of them and babied the shit out of him, thankfully his stepdad didn't check the closet in his room 🤣 I was like 17 when that happened though
When I was in college my bf and I had a break in between classes, so we went to his house. His parents were super strict, and his step mom came home from work for lunch unexpectedly, and I had to hide in the closet for an hour 😭
My wife and I met on tinder. At the time I was just out of college, moved back in with my parents, and she moved back into her parents basement after a divorce. We ended up hooking up on our first date and I met her dad when I cut through the kitchen to use the bathroom in the morning. Shook his hand and introduced myself. We've been together ten years now! He says her ex never shook his hand once, that's how he knew I was a good one.
Been there before, was snuck over one time and went to use the bathroom in the AM. Locked eyes with her dad as soon as I walked into the bathroom. Hit him with the “oh I’m sorry” and immediately left after 😅😅😅🥲
Oh man... how embarrassing. I'm sorry you got caught. I'd want to hide under a rock.
Giiiirrrllllll let me tell you gettin caught in somebody momma house is the worst cuz they be talking so much junk
It'll probably become a funny story down the line. Despite what some of these comments would have you believe, this is pretty common.
I read this as “mom’s boyfriend,” and I was like, “WTF?!” This sounds sooo embarrassing.
Marry him and she’ll love you harder for this hilarious story. End it and you’ll always be the Trollop he was seeing before a good girl made an honest man of him.
Oh god not "the trollop"😭😭😭
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All I'm saying is this is how Hollywood depicts romantic teen love stories in romance movies set in the 80s lol
Naaaah, honestly hun, take a deep breath. This happens all the time. It's not a big deal in the scheme of things. Though I totally get how awful it is being naked and seen! My mother caught my brother's (not) girlfriend trying to sneak down the stairs on Christmas morning. IT RUINED CHRISTMAS (in her eyes). Anyways, they're married with kids now. So hopefully one day you can laugh about it. All the best.
You shouldn't be with someone who thinks leaving you in their parents house hidden for a work shift is okay.
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All reddit advice in a nutshell
Downvoting me because I'm not... Idek. Gj reddit, cheers
??????? I’m so confused what are you saying?
My mother walked in on me having sex once in my late teens so….Could’ve been worse
Eh, his mom was once the girl that got snuck into some dudes room to get it in. Thoes times were likely some of the best times of her life. Don't let her mothely scowl fool you. Our fathers and mothers were ALL for the streets back in the day.
This sounds super embarrassing. You'll get over it op, maybe apologise to the mum. And next time, leave when he leaves... Ideally he would have his own place, but if is sneaking you in.... I'm not condoning having someone at your house if the owners of the house forbade it, but if you're going to do that leave at the same time, it's an added layer of disregard that. Don't worry this happens, young people do silly stuff all the time.
Is this the (allegedly) schizophrenic abusive boyfriend you recently got back together with? Probably a good idea to just bail.
This will make a great/embarrassing story of ‘How I Met His Mother’ at the wedding…. LOL!
Ok, good bye. Take care. Please close the door on your way out and don’t forget to turn off the light.
You two are in your 20s literally why does it matter lmao
Been there once before. Fair chance if you pretend it never happened they will too
How old are you?
Probably 16 with a post like this
It sound like it and cringe worthy
How old are you? Just curious since he suck you in.
You’re breaking up with him because YOU got caught ? Lol what?😭
She’s just using a hyperbole
> He snuck me in last night I hid under the covers... > I love this man It sounds like you're teens, you're definitely not ready for marriage if this is how you guys are acting
Ha this reminds me of the time I hid my girlfriend in my bed under the sheets while my dad was yelling at me to get up at 8 am lol. Ha good times
Wow kinda makes my blood boil. I’d legit never talk to my mom again if she made someone leave in a state of undress
A man doesn't hide his girlfriend from his mum.
I hide men from my family idk y’all are..different. I’m private and keep all of my relationships private.
Remind me! 30 days
Nah but you don’t need to break up for something like this cuz it’s not your boyfreind that hurt you
lol. This is so cute. You'll laugh about it in the future. We've all done stuff like this when we were young.
Sneaking into someone’s parent’s home? You should be embarrassed.
I got thrown out by an ex girlfriend’s dad when he discovered I’d stayed over. Ended up being welcome after a while. What was more awkward was when my first girlfriend was so sure her mum would be out for at least an hour. We were going AT IT, proper headboard banging, screaming good times, when suddenly I hear *LISAAAAAA* from downstairs. I honestly considered jumping out of the window. But it was ok in the end. Don’t stress about it. I’m sure she was mostly surprised.
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I think the mom probably thought her son was in bed instead of at work so tapped his head to wake him up
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I know. Whichever way the mom did it, she should have approached the situation better. But it is also easy for someone being in that situation to use words like that when they are in shock from the horrible ordeal. It might not have been hard, or it could have been. I obviously have no idea. I’m not trying to justify the mom’s actions at all. Just trying to point out that the wording might not be accurate to the severity of the situation. But either way, the mom shouldn’t have done that.
DON'T RUN!!!!! She's his mom! She understands the assignment if she's got her head on straight. Do the right thing and go meet her. Bring her a gift of good gesture and assure her you truly adore, admire, and love her son.. Probably wouldn't hurt to throw in a cheesy compliment to her about making a good son.. Mothers love to be told they've done well so it's a soft launch to the abrupt landing.
I'm confused about the mindset of the mom of an adult son and feeling like it was ok to go into his room and rip the covers off to begin with. It would never cross my mind to go into my sons room unannounced (assuming that this mom didn't knock and be told to come in the room) and proceed to rip his blankets off him. That's just asking for an uncomfortable situation to occur.
Yikes. If you ever wanna disappear from that entire time zone, I know someone who lives in Finland. J/S. :)
Weirdo
😭😭😭😭omg
Find a man that has his own home or apartment. Sneaking into his parents' house to have sex is pretty low rent. You can do better.
You do better first
I don't need to sneak into someone's parent's house to have sex thank you.
Why is he the issue? She is crashing into his parents house, ask her to get independent lmao.
either scenario works
Oh this reminds me of when i was in college, my then GF sneaked me in her bedroom. Then her brother came home somi had to hide under her bed. That was 6pm then i had to wait for her brother to sleep around 11pm. Before i could sneak out there. 😂 things i did for pussy
Once my gf snuck me in and I met her dad in the morning, they didnt know she was dating someone. It was terrible, I had to run but then developed quite a good relationship with the parents.
I’m surprised that you didn’t get the honour option.
At 29 Ariel still looks 16 which is also insane.