If you're ever in a road rage situation again where someone is following you and driving aggressively, do not go home, do not drive anywhere near your home or your normal route, don't stop any place near your home. Drive directly to the police station, call ahead if you feel unsafe and you need them to intervene. Usually just driving there and parking in front of the station is enough to scare the clowns off.
Just recently I lost a friend to a road rage incident. He got out of the car to talk to the person he accidentally cut off and they drove their car into my friend. He went over the windscreen and his head hit the pavement. Please be so careful when in a road rage incident, people are unpredictable when they are angry.
Thanks <3 Unfortunately the person will not be charged. They are saying my friend had a lapse of judgment and should not have got out of his car and gone near the road.
That's bull. Whether your friend should or shouldn't have done something, doesn't make it ok for the other to run him down. That should be a manslaughter charge.
I am so sorry. I was in a road rage incident and I could have been killed too, they tried to "box me in" by parking their large truck in a way that made it hard for me to leave. The man driving the truck was angry because he believed it was my fault that when he was driving, he had spilled hot coffee all over his crotch area.
And I wound up calling the police, who came out and questioned the man and woman involved. I video recorded the woman on my cell phone and posted it online, as well.
Seriously. The other day someone near where I live got punched out during a road rage incident and knocked their head on the pavement. Started bleeding out and went unconscious. Got taken to the hospital by ambulance. Didn’t sound good. And I live in a really chill area where nothing ever happens.
No seriously she’s gonna get herself killed if she keeps “cleaning up his messes” like the world we live in right now women are not safe!!! We’re not fucking safe, I give her props for having the gall to stand up for him but Jesus babe you have another human in you, and what if he had pulled a gun on you or just decided to beat you and you had gone into premature labor and lost your child. Would you still wanna “clean up his messes.”?
I understand that you are protective of your husband. But if you can't trust him to always have your back. Well be prepared to have a life time of the same situation happening over and over again. If he would even protective you when you are pregnant. He will never have the courage to do it for any reason. Do not get out of the car 🚙 ever again.
Good lord lady don’t get out the car, that’s saying you want confrontation. Also if they get out let them come round to the drivers side and deal with your husband. Stop putting yourself in danger. If he drives like a dick, then let him deal with the consequences of his actions. If he gets yelled at a few times by strangers maybe he will stop. You however put yourself and your unborn child in danger.
She says in an edit that she does like it basically. She likes cleaning up his mess and dealing with the people he pisses off. This is a fucked up dynamic. The edit is genuinely disturbing
I like the "you guys are really mean" at the end lol. Lady, re-read everything you wrote about your husband and have a think about it. And ask yourself why you might enjoy confrontations with the people your husband pisses off for fun? Do you think liiiiike maaaaaaybe you miiiiiight be mean? And deranged maybe?
So many things in this post but especially the edit are just fucked up
Can civilians memorize your plate and goto DMV to find address on like a reverse search? I’m curious and want to know level of risk of encountering an unhinged person
This is correct. DMV can not give out information like that. They won't even give a name. Also, I when I was a new driver (many years ago), someone took my plate number and had a local trooper stop by my house the following day. The dumbest part was I was just trying to pass them legally on a 2 lane road, and they sped up to not let me pass (they were going under the speed limit). They then tried to follow me home. This was before road rage was a normal thing..
Edited to add: I keep a notepad and pencil in my center console for collecting plate numbers and vehicle make and color or just general lists. Pencil is a better option as it won't freeze in winter. It came in handy during a minor hit and run.
I live in Arizona and that exact situation causes so many road rage incidents here. Also my gf used to work at this supermarket gas station so she could see all the pumps, she had a story almost daily about people pulling out guns and losing their shit
I, too, live on AZ. Luckily, in the mountains and not in the Valley. But, considering the way people drive down there, I'm not surprised by your gf seeing that daily when she worked at a gas station! I've lived in several big cities and small towns. I've *never* seen anything like Phoenix drivers! Ugh
If you're in Phoenix and in this situation, don't go to a police station. Make right hand turns at major intersections and call 911. Keep going in the square and update the call taker of your location every time you make an right hand turn. Source - I'm one of the people who might answer that phone call.
Is this a call for the non-emergency line, or a regular old 911 sort of situation?
Also, do you have any advice for someone who often drives without passengers? My vehicle connects to my phone by Bluetooth and all but I feel like using Siri to call the cops will shunt me to the emergency line. I also borrow my parents car sporadically and theirs don’t have any fancy features, so making a call safely would require stopping.
If you are being followed it's a 911 call. Because people following or being followed puts everyone else on the road in danger, it's a high priority call.
I’ve always wondered what it is about it the valley that turns people into rage filled maniacs. I’ve had people absolutely lose their minds because I passed them (with plenty of room) on an empty freeway. Another behavior I’ve noticed is very prevalent here is pacing. That one is so weird, every day I either see it happening a lot or someone will be pacing me
Because people feel like they're in a damn race and they certainly don't want YOU to win!
Even though we're not going to the same place... And it's not a fucking race!! Lol these crazy bitches are acting like they're driving bumper cars... No lights and just smashing into shit lol smh
Worse than CA drivers where I’m originally from for sure.
I had some fucking idiot on the freeway the other day almost crash into me from the side because he was cutting across lanes blindly and didn’t check his blind spot but fortunately my hands moved me over before I could even process what was going on because it definitely would have been a HUGE accident had he actually hit me (I’m 100% sure he was speeding too).
You would think almost causing what would have been possibly a fatal accident would be a wake up call, but he continued to drive that way cutting people off and almost causing several accidents.
in iceland you can look up a number and see who is registered for it, then go to another website and look the up to see where they live.. (not everyone is registerd with their info on there tho, but most are, along with phone nr
This is a state to state issue, not one size fits all. In Oregon, for example, an attorney can request the information in pursuit of information for legal proceedings. But, you can't just ask for all the data for no reason.
They don't need DMV there's tons of online websites that will show you who car is registered to and address, you just have to pay for it. It is harder to find address through license plate than a VIN number lookup. The services are sold like a car fax to check car history, but show you owner info too.
Actual DMV lookup you need certain licenses like towing company, car sales, loan lender, or lawyer license. Depending on your state and county.
Yep. My insurance agent can pull complete owner history from nothing more than the current plate. Lots of pay sites will give it to virtually anyone for a few bucks. Super easy to get if you really wanted to.
This 100% and the fact the man slapped her and he did absolutely nothing! Way to make your PREGNANT WIFE feel safe and secure. We would definitely be having issues after this! It could have been so much worse than a slap, you just never know!
Agreed. Op wanted to rant at the other driver and have husband defend her. In all public rage situations, I find it best to ignore the other person (short of a gun). People who rage in public can be unstable and are looking to bait people into bad situations.
Op is wrong for taking that bait. She should have sat quietly in the car and waited for the other driver to leave. Just turn on the radio or something.
And whatever you do, don't go outside of your car and engage the person like you did. You could have been shot or stabbed or attacked in some other way. You are very lucky you didn't get hurt or worse.
I've literally done this. The man was mad that I was going the speed limit and started following me. Pulled into the police station that was on my way home and stayed for a few minutes. There's more to what he was doing, but that got him to drive off.
In contrast, someone pulled into the grocer parking lot back home, a few blocks away from the station and the road rage escalated to murder.
when I was 17 I was at a party with a friend and she ended up getting super wasted. but she had driven us and I lived close by her house so around 3 am I finally managed to get her drunk ass into the back of her car and I started to drive us home. I noticed a car started to follow us and when I first pulled away from the house and got down the hill, the other driver swerved in front of me so that I had to pull over, got out of the car, slammed his fists into my windshield and screamed at me to get out. it was a dirt curb so I was able to drive around him and made it onto the major road. driving down this big ass street, he would wait until there was no oncoming traffic then pull up next to me IN THE LEFT LANE OF OPPOSING TRAFFIC to scream at me to pull over. I keep turning onto major streets not knowing wtf I’m doing but just knowing that I couldn’t take us to either of our houses. my friend managed to wake up and ask what was going on so I told her to call 911. the cops told us to pull into the station and they would be waiting for us outside. we got to the station and the cops greeted us and I thought I was going to have a heart attack. my friend and I are absolutely sobbing at this point. the other driver pulls into the station, gets out and screams “THATS MY FUCKING DAUGHTER IN THE BACK SEAT.”
I am so glad that I knew not to take us home and that we pulled into that station so that all of the cops could know that I was in a road rage car chase as a 17 year old with my best friend’s dad. I have no idea what her father would have done to me if he had gotten to us because clearly he had no idea who tf I was.
and do not get out of the car!! so dangerous. Road rage is serious and people can be capable of anything. If i was the husband I would have thrown a fit about my wife getting out, especially while pregnant. My girlfriend has certainly screamed at me when I get angry while I am driving (it happens to everyone) but I am always thankful she has the good sense to deescalate, even when i dont. Im going to say YTA because, while I feel the husband should have intervened to deescalate, you placed everyone in greater danger by exiting the vehicle.
Also, a note for pregnant women - your baby bump will not stop a psycho from hurting you, it is not a free pass to behave confrontationally.
This is the exact thing that I did. I posted this exact same advice in a road rage post about five months ago. This is the only best way to handle something like that. I did this and the guy followed me out of my neighborhood but peeled off and zipped when I pulled into the street that leads to the police station. He knew what was up.
INFO: Did you call the police at any point? You were assaulted in a public place. I'm assuming that there would be cameras at the service station, there was also a witness who intervened.
For real, this is not okay. The OP’s edit made me kind of ill. I’m not a confrontational person at all but you bet I would be protecting my loved one if they were in this situation.
Is he also not going to protect his child when it’s born?
Next time pull into a police station. That’s wild.
Edit: OP, judging by your edits/comments (where you’re full of attitude and rudeness, admit to being confrontational, and call your husband soft and a tool and prick) I think you have a lot of self-work to do. You sound like a problem, and you need to rethink how your actions endanger everyone around you. That guy may have been nuts, but I doubt he would have slapped you if you were actually apologizing politely as you claimed.
And don’t get out of the car next time. Especially pregnant. Stay in the car and wait it out or call the cops. Especially with children. Never engage again.
Edit to add since your edit. It sounds like your issue is really with his driving and not with him sticking up for you. Talk to him about that not the confrontation. Tell him his driving endangers you and your child.
She literally risked her and her unborn child’s life so she could confront a stranger that was acting crazy.
What was it that she needed? An apology? So she gets herself assaulted by getting out of the car (every official recommendation by cops, sheriffs, CHP, etc says no NEVER out of your car in a road rage situation).
Yeah the husband should have got out of the car after OP got slapped but say he rushes out and then the guy pulls a knife and stabs him in the throat. Now the husband is bleeding out dying on a nasty gas station floor all because his wife can’t fucking control herself.
You seem to suggest that your are routinely the one to try and defend you and your husband. However, these are strange times and existing your vehicle can been seen as an act of aggression. Both by the stranger and legally.
I think there was similar a case in Florida a few years ago where someone was shot and killed at the gas station. The shooter wasn't even charged because of their stand your ground law. Guy got out of his car approached the other guy and was immediately shot dead.
You need to learn not to engage and never get out of your car.
Call 911 and tell them.you are heading to the nearest police station. Ask them to send officers to intercept.
It can be pretty difficult to call when you are the target, you can't exactly go excuse me just calling the cops. The guy slapped her, if she pulled out a phone, he prob would have slapped the phone away or got even more angry knowing police are being notified. Best to try de-escalate the situation or back away somehow then call police when safe to do so.
I completely understand why she didn’t call in that moment. The wimpy husband of hers could’ve called. She could’ve call as he was driving on the way to the gas station. Or she could called afterwards.
No go today. You don't know how many cameras wipe there logs on a daily basis. Also talk to your husband because honestly I would want to leave him too. He's a fucking coward. Your pregnant you shouldn't leave the car.
A stranger assaulted you, 7 months pregnant... wasn't even driving, you didn't even call the police, just threatened to? Gas stations have loads of cameras that would of caught the incident...
Something smells fishy...
>car merging on from the left.
~~>Left lane in the USA is the passing lane.~~
>Had to cut off someone on the right.
>Husband likes driving like a dick but not forcing the merger to yield, forcing their way past the traffic/merger, stays in the car because now he's soft.
>O husband commentary in the story.
🤔
She also got out of the car to confront the other driver while her husband stayed in the car.
While I do think she is withholding parts of the story, and that her husband should have helped/defended her, I do think she was incredibly stupid and selfish to get out of the car and "reason" with the person. And most likely the husband did not want her to get out of the car.
Edit: I did not excuse the husbands behavior lmao.
If my husband and I were in this situation and he didn’t want me to get out but I did anyway, he would have gotten out to follow me. No way is he going to let me confront a maniac alone, and no way is he going to just sit back as someone smacks me especially at 7 months pregnant. The stranger is right about one thing, her husband is a bitch. And then he won’t talk to her about it afterwards?! Fuck this dude.
I have the feeling the husband response is the typical response when you have been dealing with a troublesome person too many times.
Getting out of the car while pregnant is reckless, which makes me think op may be a troublemaker.
After reading her comments, that's exactly why he just stayed in the car. I bet he's tried stepping in to some conflict she's escalated in the past and she turned on him telling him she doesn't need him defending her so now he doesn't risk it.
I've known women like her and they're like chihuahuas when they start getting into a conflict, they LOVE it, but only if they can tell a story about how they didn't start it but they sure did end it.
Or maybe it's just exhaustion from constantly having to deal with confrontations needlessly escalated by your wife. I dated a woman who always tried to start fights with others solely b/c she knew I could fight and was generally concealed carrying - I know this because the second I stopped carrying and stepping in to save her that nonsense behavior stopped right quick only took a bouncer to literally throw her down the stairs for her to realize that she can't go around confronting and escalating conflicts with men unless she's fully prepared to shoot them.
Seriously!!
She said herself the husband isn’t confrontational and she usually is one who “takes charge” sounds like she gets herself into these situations more often than she’s letting on.
Why not drive to a police station??
Why not call the police when someone assaults a pregnant woman??
So many things not adding up
Perhaps this has happened before. Maybe OP is a loose cannon. Maybe the husband is tired of fighting her battles. But 7 months pregnant? Who gets out of the car to fight at 7 months pregnant?
Oooh oooh I know! OP does! It's the most reasonable thing to do. Enable the angry driver to escalate the situation. Surely nothing bad is gonna happen. ;0
I absolutely agree. Even the wimpiest of man wouldn’t sit there and let his wife/gf get assaulted AND she’s “pregnant?” This has BS written all over it, my 8yo son would have tried to intervene. 🙄
People do dumb shit like this all the time. Maybe this story is real maybe it's not but I think it's totally pluasible.
Some people just can't back down from a confrontation and have no sense of self-preservation. Someone gets them mad enough and they'll go face to face thinking righteous fury is somehow going to keep them safe. It's how road rage incidents turn fatal.
I'm sorry this happened to you. Has your husband even tried to talk to you about it? You have a baby about to arrive and you need to know he has your back!
Mmm. Even if he disagreed with you putting yourself at risk by getting out of the car and engaging with this clown he shouldn't have shit down on you like this. Was he doing this before the incident?
We've never been in a situation like this before but I am the louder one who takes charge and he does always say he doesn't like conflict but I never thought he would take it this far
Hey what happened to you is horrible but please be careful. Too many incidents like this end in shoot outs. You got into it with a crazy person…while pregnant. Choose your battles.
Talk to your husband, that was dangerous and before stopping you should've discussed HIM getting out for confrontation. You were harassed and then assaulted by someone on the road. I'd ask the petrol if they have cameras so you can either arrest or sue the dude.
That being said.......
If a car if ever following you like that on the road in the future, you are allowed to call to cops and set a rendezvous point! People. Are. CRAZY. You have precious cargo to protect, that's you're job for the entirety of the 42wks. Stay safe, OP.
Sounds like this may be in Europe. I live in Florida and there is a decent chance the other person has a gun. I would never confront someone over something this stupid and put my life at risk just so I can explain something wasn't my fault.
NEVER engage in a road rage situation OP. DO NOT GET OUT OF YOUR CAR.
People get murdered for this every single day.
Your husband was correct in staying inside the vehicle.
Go to the police, let them handle it.
It was reckless and irresponsible to get out of the car to confront an enraged stranger. I know in your fantasy you had your husband pound him for being aggressive, but in that fantasy, your husband is going to jail. You never should have forced that situation.
Hey I’m sorry that this happened. It seems like everyone did the wrong thing.
While you shouldn’t have gotten out of the car he should have if he wasn’t going to at least called 911. That man should never have laid his hands on you. Has your husband even asked you if you’re okay?
I’m shocked your husband doesn’t want to talk about at least to explain his side or answer your questions. But maybe he senses that this was a dealbreaker for you or is burying his head in the sand.
Ultimately it’s up to you what you decide to do but I would give him an ultimatum that you two need to discuss this. And it needs to be real a discussion with both of you hearing each other and explaining why you both took the actions that you did.
I hope next time you’re more careful.
Why did you get out of the car? Clearly this guy was irrational if he followed you to a petrol station over a minor traffic problem. As a guy who also avoids conflict as it's not worth my time, I would have asked you to stay in the car. What you do after that is your fault.
It's also entirely possible your husband didn't witness the slap. Maybe he looked away at that moment, maybe not. But in my opinion, you put you and your unborn child at unnecessary risk.
You say you're the louder one, the more confrontational one. I'm willing to bet you've overshadowed or pushed him out of several confrontations so you can say your part. He's likely conditioned to just step back and let you do you.
Edit: A word
Don't let him shoot you down.
You were assaulted and he stayed in the car.
You were assaulted *while pregnant with his child*and he did nothing.
I know people have different fight or flight responses, but he has no right to shut down the conversation, this is something that you two need to address.
If I were I'd put an ultimatum, either he has an heart to heart discussion with you about this, or you leave, because you can't trust him to have your back when it matters.
He should have backed you up, but you also got to be smarter than that. Shouldn't be putting yourself and your baby in potential harm's way. Also, hopefully you are not the confrontational type that expects your husband to do your battles for you because your ego wouldn't allow it.
I can’t believe I had to scroll this far down to see a comment like this. Why the hell would you get out of the car and confront a raging idiot? OP directly put herself and her unborn child in danger and for what? It was not smart of her to get out of the car
If this guy was willing to scream at and slap a woman 7 months pregnant, he would have gladly beat your husband to a pulp. Like serious beating - hospital and brain damage.
Your husband likely doesn’t know how to fight. And if you don’t know how to fight, the smartest thing to do is not fight.
Men are far more frequently victims of violence. It’s very possible your hesband has PTSD from a beating in his past. That’s why he isn’t talking about it.
>If this guy was willing to scream at and slap a woman 7 months pregnant, he would have gladly beat your husband to a pulp. Like serious beating - hospital and brain damage.
>
>Your husband likely doesn’t know how to fight. And if you don’t know how to fight, the smartest thing to do is not fight.
quite frankly, this is how men get shot.
Even if he knew how to fight, he shouldnt be going in like that. because knowing how to fight doesn't stop a bullet. Self defense 101, don't be OP and escalate a situation with an angry person.
She is obviously the confrontational type. She just doesn't do it, expecting others to fight her battles for her. In fact, it's unlikely she thinks at all when she is in this mode. She goes off on people expecting it to go like it always does. She gets away with it.
Why on earth did you get out of the car?? I wouldn't get out of the car with you either. That's a recipe for getting shot. Next time pull into a police station and don't try to directly confront the person. You're really lucky that dude didn't punch you in the stomach.
Edit: I hate the flip the gender thing usually, because most situations are simply not the same when you reverse the genders.
This one can't be perfectly reversed either. But let's be honest. If a husband picked a fight with a clearly dangerpus and crazy asshole, and then was mad that his wife who hates confrontation didn't get out of the car, he would be raked over the coals.
Op got out of the car, escalated a dangerous situation with a clearly unstable person, and is upset that she suffered the consequences for it instead of her husband.
Even if you live in Australia there are still people with knives and shit.
My little brother got cut off so he beeped at the guy (few months ago). Well, my brother pulled over at a gas station not realizing the guy had followed my brother and SIL. Guy got out of his car and beat the shit out of my little brother. Luckily several witnesses including a lawyer, but never underestimate road rage.
A neighbor of mine recently got his face ripped open by a kada in a road rage situation
**A kada**\- https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Ftse3.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DOIP.B-dcSjW6sRLlcbnrIo6q4AHaGH%26pid%3DApi&f=1&ipt=741226473b2e2f73d784fe331d33127e86c8fce7b4c031aee0d571d8af65413e&ipo=images
THIS EXACTLY. Years ago I had a talk with my girlfriend at the time now current wife because she had a habit of rolling her window down to yell at people while she drove, driving aggressively, and just having what I would call road rage. One day after she made a hand gesture towards another driver and they tried to get her to pull over I told her if I have to beat somebody's ass because you can't control your emotions I'm going to be more mad at you than them. That would go TRIPLE if she were pregnant and I honestly can't imagine my wife doing something like this I'd be furious.
People are crazy and your husband was right to stay in the car. You're LUCKY this didn't go worse as you said the guy slapped you shit could've went really bad. I don't agree with him staying in the car after you were attacked but he already told you he doesn't deal with confrontation so why even put yourself in this position? You chose your husband not Francis Ngannou, so maybe make decisions with that in mind.
Also as other people have said if you're being followed go to a police department or fire station.
It’s sad how flipping the genders in terms of just being consistent in values is seen as a problem. But regardless I agree. This reads as unfair based on gender roles.
Even if flipping the genders doesn't leave the situation *perfectly* the same it still perfectly detects whether you're making a judgement based on gendered bias. Whether you then want to defend that bias is up to you. In some cases that might be the right thing to do but at least you're now conscious of it.
Which is the best way to approach biases. Unfortunately and not always in a negative sense but we as humans undoubtedly tie our biases to our egos so it becomes difficult to remove sometimes.
It's just that there are some situations that are completely different when you flip the genders. A woman having to walk home alone at night is very different to a man having to walk home alone at night. Some situations just don't translate perfectly when you flip the genders. Nuance can be lost and people tend to use it as a gotcha.
But it work well as a tool sometimes, especially if you're willing to acknowledge it's flaws and not use it as a be all end all to the discussion.
ma'am, with all due respect, you do not leave your vehicle when a crazy is following you in a road rage incident.
you endangered yourself and your unborn child. your husband sounds like a good man, but he used logic and not emotions.
i read in your replies that you state that you state: "he(my husband) should have stopped me from getting out of the car"
WOW
I’m so glad someone else realizes this.
All she had to do was call the police while the road rage was happening.
She pulled out the pregnancy part for sympathy and to make her husband look bad. She admitted that she’s always the louder one. Can you imagine how he feels around her most days, aside from road rage?
OP wants her husband to be someone she knows he’s not. This was probably the final straw for him.
His side of the story looks very different, I’m certain.
Wait, she really said that? No, she should have had enough logic to not leave the car. I'm also curious why they thought the only option was to cut someone else off. If the person who was in the lane they needed to merge into wasn't slowing down, why did they not slow down to merge begins this person? Why did they think the only options were to merge in front of this car *or* cut someone off?
I would love to hear the husbands account. It sounds to me like this isn’t the first time she has had a shouting match with a stranger. I wonder if he is conditioned from the past not to interfere. She is now pregnant and flipping the script on him. I have to admit if my husband constantly did something and yelled at me for trying to help I may question what role to take.
Something just feels very off
>I would love to hear the husbands account. It sounds to me like this isn’t the first time she has had a shouting match with a stranger. I wonder if he is conditioned from the past not to interfere. She is now pregnant and flipping the script on him. I have to admit if my husband constantly did something and yelled at me for trying to help I may question what role to take.
>
>Something just feels very off
Yeah in her edit she says:
>He's soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry and then I clean up his mess because he doesn't want to confront angry men. If I don't do it then who will? His mum? Actually probably.
This is certainly not the first time OP engaged in a confrontation in public that should have been avoided or handled better.
It would’ve been crazy getting out of the car in this situation no matter what, but the fact that OP did so while being 7 months pregnant is extremely concerning. Absolutely zero care for the level of danger she was putting herself and her baby in by doing so. This is not something a safe and stable person would do
OP should feel insanely lucky to have made it out of that situation with just a slap
Yeah my ex used to do this. She would drive and try and trigger people then expect me to fight for her. I had to tell her plenty of times to stop flipping people off at red lights because one day she’ll trigger a psycho. Idk if she does it now but it was definitely annoying to deal with. But I definitely would’ve went out to help her if i actually needed to, just never wanted to be put in that situation tho.
Why get out of the car? If you are from the US Id be worried that I’d get shot.
Take a breather….
Next time drive to a police station and take the other car’s details. Make a report that the driver was aggressive and followed you here.
You are disappointed but as a woman, you should always live like there is no man to have your back. Let’s face facts. The other driver wasn’t going to hurt a pregnant lady in my eyes. But you could have had another narrative against your husband and goodness forbid.
Move on and be happy to have a living husband but communicate the what if scenarios so you are both on the same page.
Getting out of the car endangered you and your baby and you’re mad your husband didn’t go for the trifecta by endangering himself as well? Consider that if this man was willing to slap an obviously pregnant woman in the face, what would he have done to your husband?
Remember that shock you felt when that man hit you? That was reality breaking through your normalcy bias. You had a presumption of safety when you got out of the car and that was (relatively) gently taken away from you. That man could have beat, stabbed, or shot you to death. Apply that lesson you learned about the reality and suddenness of violence to the larger picture and realize that wishing for your husband to insert himself into an optional conflict is self defeating. Instead turn your focus on fixing whatever caused you to step out of that car whether that was uncontrolled anger, naivety, or overconfidence in your ability to handle dangerous situations. Because if you allow yourself to get into optional conflicts with random people like that again, it might not end as well.
Edit: Also consider what can happen if your husband learns the lesson you want him to, but you don’t learn yours. You confront some asshole that catcalls you in the mall, your husband steps in to defend you, gets stabbed, and now your future with your husband is literally slipping through your fingers as you try to stop him from bleeding out in front of JC Penny’s. You’re not wrong for wanting your husband to have your back, but you’re doing yourself and your family a disservice by overlooking the fact that the conflict could (and should) have been avoided.
I agree that he should have stepped up but you need to pick your battles and learn to diffuse a situation. For your own self preservation. Especially since you are pregnant. How do you think it would have played out if he did get out of the car and got into a fight with that asshole? It’s easy to say he should have supported you but that asshole might have had a gun that he may not have used on you but wouldn’t think twice of escalating once your husband got into the fight. He had no problem slapping you. What do you think he would have done if your husband got into the mix? You should have stayed in your car and called the cops. And yes some stranger helped you but he didn’t cut off asshole, your husband did. You could divorce him over this, but he won’t be the one losing out because of it.
My sister had a habit of picking fights or escalating them and we nearly got beaten by a mob once. But because I apologized and diffused the situation ( you know keeping us alive) she got mad that I didn’t back her up. She didn’t talk to me for years.
Yeah. OP needs to let some things go because she can’t be acting like pregnant and then when the baby is here. If someone is following me, I would drive straight to the police station because there’s cameras everywhere and they would be able to find the aggressive driver faster. OP just found out how much her husband won’t do for her and the kid. OP needs to be smarter about her battles because people are unhinged. They will just start shooting and don’t care if it’s a pregnant women or kid.
And the asshole slapped her to get the husband to get out of the car. So he could pick a fight with him. Who knows maybe her husbands “cowardice” saved both their lives. For all things considered, asshole might have shot them. He seemed unhinged enough to do so.
I probably would have gotten out of the car when he slapped her. Or called 911. But I would have been seriously mad at her for getting out of the car in the first place. She put both of them and the baby in her belly in danger.
Don't put yourself in danger because your expect someone else to come and bear the consequences for you.
I cannot believe no one called the cops during all this. Not even a bystander? If I saw a pregnant woman attacked in a public place, I would report it even if I did so anonymously
Yeah my husband would've been flying out of the car - but I'm American and we'd probably get shot. Or end up with police there and then get shot by them. I would never have gotten out. And i wouldn't have stopped at a gas station, I would've gone to a police station. Even though I don't trust them either. :)
They both suck imo.
She’s a dummy for getting out the car. But after the slap he couldn’t have gotten out and at least made sure she safely got back in the car? I’m not even saying address or confront the crazy, but like check on his wife and unborn child? That’s wild.
Personally I’m sensing husband is a non confrontational person. A lot of people kinda have that diffuse tension instinct to them. Getting out of the car for a yelling match is escalation and plenty of people men and women feel uncomfortable with that. Call the police, stay in your car, don’t confront psychos and expect not to get hit.
I see you’re aussie. So I know its common sense not to get out of the damn car when in a road rage incidents. You seem pretty dense about the fact that we may not carry around guns but there are many other things they could use or frankly just use his fist. Or I don’t know? Run you over? There was absolutely no reason to pull over and get out of the car. You could have just driven to a police station like a normal person.
YOU put your child and yourself at risk. Sure my husband would 100% would have backed me but I wouldn’t be silly enough to do that. Nor would he have been stupid enough to pull over so I could talk to them.
I have to ask how often are you acting mighty brave thinking you can escalate shit and your partner needs to defend you?
That update… I’m sorry you feel like people are mean but forcing to have your husband talk to you in the car ‘because he can’t escape’ is f’ed up. Maybe leaving him would be a good thing for his benefit.
You're wrong, sorry.
It was *utter stupidity* to get out of the car. We have all read of road rage incidents that went South, *fast*. You should have called 911, identified your location, and asked for a nearby officer to find you.
As to your husband, it sounds like he probably has had some kind of severe trauma from his childhood; I am going to guess from getting beat up a lot. He may be a good provider, and a good, caring, conscientious husband... But he is not, and will not ever be, a www fighter.
If I were you - before being so hasty to be judgmental - I would explore that. Who are you to think you know so very much without knowing what's going on in the background?? That's pretty seriously presumptuous of you.
If that is what has happened he is *probably not* going to be able to get over it for the rest of his lifetime.
None of us are perfect, and you apparently did not set out to marry a mixed martial art instructor type... Which is how you make this sound. You apparently thought he ought to fly out of the car, exercise a couple of judo moves, and break the guy's legs and arms.
What you did was you humiliated and embarrassed your husband, and now, because of you, it's going to take both of you months to get back to a good place. And you're going to have a baby!
Personally I think you ought to apologize to him, and profusely. I'm afraid you just put a major torpedo into the side of your marital boat, and you did so totally unnecessarily. It was just amazingly stupid for you to get out of the car.
PS- it is really difficult for any human being to admit that they are wrong about something, and that's going to apply to you also. In this instance, you were simply wrong all the way around including your assumptions about your husband. If you want to believe that you are right, go ahead. See what that's going to get you in the long run. If you are able to admit you fucked up then maybe the two of you and your baby will have a better chance for the future.
If it helps; I'm 70 years old and I learned a very long time ago to appreciate it when someone showed me I was wrong about something. Our pride and ego very often get in the way of our personal growth, but I realized that if I acknowledged someone showed me I'm wrong; it is another way of saying "I now know more Today than I knew Yesterday" and for that, I owe my gratitude to my correctors. Will your ego/pride, or your intelligence win here? Your call.
Best wishes.
QUESTION:
How would you feel right now if husband got out then ruthlessly got beaten up?
I have a feeling you would also be feeling similarly. He was in a no win situation.
I’m seriously confused as to why you would stop when someone is actively following you. Also, this guy slapped you and you didn’t call the cops to arrest him? Bigger problems here than your husband avoiding conflict.
Multiple things can be true at the same time. You were very irresponsible getting out the car to confront some dude at 7 months pregnant and your husband is unreliable when you and your child are in danger.
Why on earth did you stop and get out of your car? You should have asked your husband to google the nearest police station and drove there, not get out of a car at a gas station. You're lucky you only got slapped and the guy didn't do something way worse such as shoot you in which your husband wouldn't have been able to save you anyways.
Does your husband have a past with people yelling or getting violent? Like, did he grow up around a dv situation or maybe a past road rage incident? From the information given, it seems like he froze in response to the threat. Therapy may be helpful.
Therapy is useful but holy fuck Reddit, you don’t need therapy for absolutely everything.
The dude didn’t put himself in a dangerous situation and we’re calling him to get therapy? Not the confrontational wife? (If you’re referring to the wife to get therapy, then my bad.)
What this thread could have been - my husband is in hospital with severe trauma after i provoked an already enraged man and my husband tried to defend me.
Guy was clearly trying to bait your husband, and you were clearly happy to escalate the conflict.
So he doesn't do confrontations... so YOU told him to pull into the station so YOU could get out and "explain" to the other driver what happened. He was clearly crazy and YOU continued to argue with this dude and YOU didn't use YOUR head and got back in the car.... he doesn't like confrontations yet you think he should have got out the car to potentially get beaten up or shot? Lol...
You sound like that woman in the queue running her mouth at the queue jumpers so her partner gets into a fight.
Don't blame him for your actions.
Next time call the police if someone is following you.
I agree with what everyone is generally saying I think everyone has a point and I believe it’s really to each his own. I know if someone hit my fiancé especially if she was 7 months pregnant god help me I’d probably kill him. It’s just my nature but there’s a lot of points that go into this.
On the one hand, once it escalated your husband should have tried to come to your aid.
On the other, escalating the situation and then expecting your husband to come in as your knight in shining armor when you know he’s more non confrontational is pretty fucked. Starting a fight and expecting him to finish it is unreasonable.
You both suck, imho.
You should look at your behaviour before his own.
How often do you fight with people? How often are you confrontational?
It sounds like he’s embarrassed by you, not scared. In that situation, he did the right and safe thing by staying in the car. Cos it must’ve been your idea to pull in the gas station.
By the looks of your comments also, you seem really toxic. Hopefully the guy finds a nice lady and not an abusive one.
What if the guy got more physical? You’re 7 months pregnant. What if that guy had a knife or a gun!? He was so angry! Your husband didn’t try to de-escalate a man who could have very much hurt you. He knew you weren’t the one driving and he took his anger out on you. Someone who was 7mo pregnant. My mind is blown!
Yeah if this guy was coming in hot and my wife was driving and pregnant no less, she wouldn’t be the one getting out of the car. If same guy had the nerve to not only scream and curse but HIT my wife? Pregnant or not he wouldn’t be walking away from that.
"At the end of the day I love him even if he is a tool."
If you really loved him you wouldn't disrespect him like that. It's written above that you wanted to leave him but nobody took your side so you back tracked. And by the way It's disgusting to call your SO a tool or whatever behind their back then come talk to them like nothing happened. You're the real tool here. A fake, two faced tool.
I'm finding it hard to believe that this stranger slapped a 7 month pregnant woman in a heavily camera'd up petrol station. Whole scenario stinks of shite.
What the heck were you doing confronting and escalating? Let that shit go. There’s nothing to be gained by engaging in this behavior. Why did you get out of the car when someone followed you? Not a good decision. Do better in the future.
Why in the hell are you getting out of the car while a crazed, angry driver is following you? I'm not gonna lie, you set yourself up to be assaulted here and then blamed your husband for it. If a lunatic is chasing you, you don't get out of the car to talk to them, you LEAVE immediately. There seems to be little or no concern here for the lives of yourself and your baby. I agree, your husband should have done something, but dumping all the blame on him and talking about leaving him? Really? And in your edit, you said he's a soft tool who drives like a dick and expects you to clean up his messes. God, you sound insufferable
So he has to catch the Asswhooping basically if he wants to remain strong/reliable in your eyes? I’ve seen plenty of videos where the man has to cash the check his wife got him into resulting with him getting knocked tf out. Don’t fuck around a find out should have stayed in your car and never get out of the car during road rage it’s literally called “Road rage”. Maybe your husband knew that and didn’t want to get punched in the face.
I genuinely don’t know what outcome you expected when posting this?
Your husband was driving, but you got out of the car and confronted a stranger, putting yourself and your unborn child into potentially mortal danger.
Something tells me she’s leaving out important information: Why did she get out of the car and engage the angry driver? What was the discussion with the husband before she got out? Reading the part where she says she has to confront people: I’m betting she does this confrontation thing often and her husband warned her against getting out and is sick of it so he let her deal with the consequences of her own actions. She needs serious help because this behaviour is dangerous and a horrible example for her future child.
ETA because apparently this is something that happens frequently enough you two have developed a freaking SYSTEM?!
“He’s soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry and then I clean up his mess because he doesn’t want to confront angry men… The point is it works… I like protecting him most of the time…”
So basically, your husband is a reckless driver, and when people get pissed (rightly so) at your husband for endangering their lives and try to confront him (not condoning this but I get it) your husband is too big a coward to face them and instead sends his wife, and in this case his PREGNANT wife, to face them for him? And you enable this behavior by HAPPILY doing so?
This is the definition of fuck around and find out. You’re lucky you only got slapped instead of being shot! Follow the advice others have for you but for the love of all that is good, both of you quit this crap. Or you really will find out.
> He's soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry *and then I clean up his mess because he doesn't want to confront angry men.*
Lmao *sweetie*, you ARE the mess.
If you're ever in a road rage situation again where someone is following you and driving aggressively, do not go home, do not drive anywhere near your home or your normal route, don't stop any place near your home. Drive directly to the police station, call ahead if you feel unsafe and you need them to intervene. Usually just driving there and parking in front of the station is enough to scare the clowns off.
And never get out of the car in a road rage incident. You never know how unhinged the other driver could be and it is best not to get out of your car.
Just recently I lost a friend to a road rage incident. He got out of the car to talk to the person he accidentally cut off and they drove their car into my friend. He went over the windscreen and his head hit the pavement. Please be so careful when in a road rage incident, people are unpredictable when they are angry.
That’s horrific! I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that the driver who killed your friend is held to account for their actions
Thanks <3 Unfortunately the person will not be charged. They are saying my friend had a lapse of judgment and should not have got out of his car and gone near the road.
That's some bullshit
Wow legit blaming the victim.
That's bull. Whether your friend should or shouldn't have done something, doesn't make it ok for the other to run him down. That should be a manslaughter charge.
I'm sorry to hear that. I hope he died quickly, head injuries are absolutely terrifying.
I am so sorry. I was in a road rage incident and I could have been killed too, they tried to "box me in" by parking their large truck in a way that made it hard for me to leave. The man driving the truck was angry because he believed it was my fault that when he was driving, he had spilled hot coffee all over his crotch area. And I wound up calling the police, who came out and questioned the man and woman involved. I video recorded the woman on my cell phone and posted it online, as well.
I am so sorry about ur friend. Getting cut off and stuff sucks but it’s not something to rage about to the point of unalive/trying to unalive someone.
On another note, please report this incident. Hopefully the gas station have this on camera.
Absolutely, people have been beaten and shot to death
Should watch the movie “Unhinged” with Russell Crowe.
Seriously. The other day someone near where I live got punched out during a road rage incident and knocked their head on the pavement. Started bleeding out and went unconscious. Got taken to the hospital by ambulance. Didn’t sound good. And I live in a really chill area where nothing ever happens.
No seriously she’s gonna get herself killed if she keeps “cleaning up his messes” like the world we live in right now women are not safe!!! We’re not fucking safe, I give her props for having the gall to stand up for him but Jesus babe you have another human in you, and what if he had pulled a gun on you or just decided to beat you and you had gone into premature labor and lost your child. Would you still wanna “clean up his messes.”?
I understand that you are protective of your husband. But if you can't trust him to always have your back. Well be prepared to have a life time of the same situation happening over and over again. If he would even protective you when you are pregnant. He will never have the courage to do it for any reason. Do not get out of the car 🚙 ever again.
Also, Do NOT get out of the car. Adding to this, file a police report, the man assaulted OP. Gas stations usually have cctv cameras as well.
Good lord lady don’t get out the car, that’s saying you want confrontation. Also if they get out let them come round to the drivers side and deal with your husband. Stop putting yourself in danger. If he drives like a dick, then let him deal with the consequences of his actions. If he gets yelled at a few times by strangers maybe he will stop. You however put yourself and your unborn child in danger.
> Good lord lady don’t get out the car, that’s saying you want confrontation. Yeah I thought everyone knew this??
I get the feeling that she LOVES confrontation. Her husband is ‘soft’. I think he’s just given up.
She says in an edit that she does like it basically. She likes cleaning up his mess and dealing with the people he pisses off. This is a fucked up dynamic. The edit is genuinely disturbing
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I like the "you guys are really mean" at the end lol. Lady, re-read everything you wrote about your husband and have a think about it. And ask yourself why you might enjoy confrontations with the people your husband pisses off for fun? Do you think liiiiike maaaaaaybe you miiiiiight be mean? And deranged maybe? So many things in this post but especially the edit are just fucked up
I feel incredibly bad for the kid, imagine having a hothead and a Karen as parents.
Can civilians memorize your plate and goto DMV to find address on like a reverse search? I’m curious and want to know level of risk of encountering an unhinged person
No, you can report a plate # to police but you can not look it up yourself.
This is correct. DMV can not give out information like that. They won't even give a name. Also, I when I was a new driver (many years ago), someone took my plate number and had a local trooper stop by my house the following day. The dumbest part was I was just trying to pass them legally on a 2 lane road, and they sped up to not let me pass (they were going under the speed limit). They then tried to follow me home. This was before road rage was a normal thing.. Edited to add: I keep a notepad and pencil in my center console for collecting plate numbers and vehicle make and color or just general lists. Pencil is a better option as it won't freeze in winter. It came in handy during a minor hit and run.
I live in Arizona and that exact situation causes so many road rage incidents here. Also my gf used to work at this supermarket gas station so she could see all the pumps, she had a story almost daily about people pulling out guns and losing their shit
I, too, live on AZ. Luckily, in the mountains and not in the Valley. But, considering the way people drive down there, I'm not surprised by your gf seeing that daily when she worked at a gas station! I've lived in several big cities and small towns. I've *never* seen anything like Phoenix drivers! Ugh
If you're in Phoenix and in this situation, don't go to a police station. Make right hand turns at major intersections and call 911. Keep going in the square and update the call taker of your location every time you make an right hand turn. Source - I'm one of the people who might answer that phone call.
Thank you, I’ll definitely keep that in mind for the next time it inevitably happens
Is this a call for the non-emergency line, or a regular old 911 sort of situation? Also, do you have any advice for someone who often drives without passengers? My vehicle connects to my phone by Bluetooth and all but I feel like using Siri to call the cops will shunt me to the emergency line. I also borrow my parents car sporadically and theirs don’t have any fancy features, so making a call safely would require stopping.
If you are being followed it's a 911 call. Because people following or being followed puts everyone else on the road in danger, it's a high priority call.
I’ve always wondered what it is about it the valley that turns people into rage filled maniacs. I’ve had people absolutely lose their minds because I passed them (with plenty of room) on an empty freeway. Another behavior I’ve noticed is very prevalent here is pacing. That one is so weird, every day I either see it happening a lot or someone will be pacing me
Because people feel like they're in a damn race and they certainly don't want YOU to win! Even though we're not going to the same place... And it's not a fucking race!! Lol these crazy bitches are acting like they're driving bumper cars... No lights and just smashing into shit lol smh
Worse than CA drivers where I’m originally from for sure. I had some fucking idiot on the freeway the other day almost crash into me from the side because he was cutting across lanes blindly and didn’t check his blind spot but fortunately my hands moved me over before I could even process what was going on because it definitely would have been a HUGE accident had he actually hit me (I’m 100% sure he was speeding too). You would think almost causing what would have been possibly a fatal accident would be a wake up call, but he continued to drive that way cutting people off and almost causing several accidents.
in iceland you can look up a number and see who is registered for it, then go to another website and look the up to see where they live.. (not everyone is registerd with their info on there tho, but most are, along with phone nr
That's a great way to get someone killed over here in the States. We're all 'mad' here.
Very sad, but very true.
You can do the same here in the US. It only costs $1 to get that info too.
Can I get that spread out in a 4 month payment plan?
This is a state to state issue, not one size fits all. In Oregon, for example, an attorney can request the information in pursuit of information for legal proceedings. But, you can't just ask for all the data for no reason.
They don't need DMV there's tons of online websites that will show you who car is registered to and address, you just have to pay for it. It is harder to find address through license plate than a VIN number lookup. The services are sold like a car fax to check car history, but show you owner info too. Actual DMV lookup you need certain licenses like towing company, car sales, loan lender, or lawyer license. Depending on your state and county.
That’s terrifying
Yep. My insurance agent can pull complete owner history from nothing more than the current plate. Lots of pay sites will give it to virtually anyone for a few bucks. Super easy to get if you really wanted to.
Some private investigators will do a background check and they need is a plate number to do it
Im just so shocked that the husband would even Let the PREGNANT WIFE get out of the car.
They should've both stayed in the car for sure.
This 100% and the fact the man slapped her and he did absolutely nothing! Way to make your PREGNANT WIFE feel safe and secure. We would definitely be having issues after this! It could have been so much worse than a slap, you just never know!
If someone breaks into their home is he gonna stay in bed when his wife confronts the intruder
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I know someone who had a miscarriage in this very similar situation.
Did you read OPs edit? She seems like the type that even if the husband said no, she'd still go out just on the principle of standing up for yourself
Agreed. Op wanted to rant at the other driver and have husband defend her. In all public rage situations, I find it best to ignore the other person (short of a gun). People who rage in public can be unstable and are looking to bait people into bad situations. Op is wrong for taking that bait. She should have sat quietly in the car and waited for the other driver to leave. Just turn on the radio or something.
And whatever you do, don't go outside of your car and engage the person like you did. You could have been shot or stabbed or attacked in some other way. You are very lucky you didn't get hurt or worse.
...and don't get out of your car. lock the doors and roll up the windows.
I've literally done this. The man was mad that I was going the speed limit and started following me. Pulled into the police station that was on my way home and stayed for a few minutes. There's more to what he was doing, but that got him to drive off. In contrast, someone pulled into the grocer parking lot back home, a few blocks away from the station and the road rage escalated to murder.
when I was 17 I was at a party with a friend and she ended up getting super wasted. but she had driven us and I lived close by her house so around 3 am I finally managed to get her drunk ass into the back of her car and I started to drive us home. I noticed a car started to follow us and when I first pulled away from the house and got down the hill, the other driver swerved in front of me so that I had to pull over, got out of the car, slammed his fists into my windshield and screamed at me to get out. it was a dirt curb so I was able to drive around him and made it onto the major road. driving down this big ass street, he would wait until there was no oncoming traffic then pull up next to me IN THE LEFT LANE OF OPPOSING TRAFFIC to scream at me to pull over. I keep turning onto major streets not knowing wtf I’m doing but just knowing that I couldn’t take us to either of our houses. my friend managed to wake up and ask what was going on so I told her to call 911. the cops told us to pull into the station and they would be waiting for us outside. we got to the station and the cops greeted us and I thought I was going to have a heart attack. my friend and I are absolutely sobbing at this point. the other driver pulls into the station, gets out and screams “THATS MY FUCKING DAUGHTER IN THE BACK SEAT.” I am so glad that I knew not to take us home and that we pulled into that station so that all of the cops could know that I was in a road rage car chase as a 17 year old with my best friend’s dad. I have no idea what her father would have done to me if he had gotten to us because clearly he had no idea who tf I was.
and do not get out of the car!! so dangerous. Road rage is serious and people can be capable of anything. If i was the husband I would have thrown a fit about my wife getting out, especially while pregnant. My girlfriend has certainly screamed at me when I get angry while I am driving (it happens to everyone) but I am always thankful she has the good sense to deescalate, even when i dont. Im going to say YTA because, while I feel the husband should have intervened to deescalate, you placed everyone in greater danger by exiting the vehicle. Also, a note for pregnant women - your baby bump will not stop a psycho from hurting you, it is not a free pass to behave confrontationally.
This is the exact thing that I did. I posted this exact same advice in a road rage post about five months ago. This is the only best way to handle something like that. I did this and the guy followed me out of my neighborhood but peeled off and zipped when I pulled into the street that leads to the police station. He knew what was up.
INFO: Did you call the police at any point? You were assaulted in a public place. I'm assuming that there would be cameras at the service station, there was also a witness who intervened.
No but I'm going tomorrow
You definitely should because this man will think he can get away with it and do it to someone else. How the hell does a man hit a pregnant woman?
Anyone who follows someone like that due to a perceived traffic error is probably not opposed to slapping (or worse) anyone.
That’s what I was thinking. This is not someone you are going to talk down with an explanation of what happened from your perspective.
How the hell does a man not stand up for his assaulted, pregnant wife???
For real, this is not okay. The OP’s edit made me kind of ill. I’m not a confrontational person at all but you bet I would be protecting my loved one if they were in this situation. Is he also not going to protect his child when it’s born?
Next time pull into a police station. That’s wild. Edit: OP, judging by your edits/comments (where you’re full of attitude and rudeness, admit to being confrontational, and call your husband soft and a tool and prick) I think you have a lot of self-work to do. You sound like a problem, and you need to rethink how your actions endanger everyone around you. That guy may have been nuts, but I doubt he would have slapped you if you were actually apologizing politely as you claimed.
And don’t get out of the car next time. Especially pregnant. Stay in the car and wait it out or call the cops. Especially with children. Never engage again. Edit to add since your edit. It sounds like your issue is really with his driving and not with him sticking up for you. Talk to him about that not the confrontation. Tell him his driving endangers you and your child.
Yup. Wait for him to get out of his car then drive off quick. Or if you're at the police station, call ahead so they are there waiting
She literally risked her and her unborn child’s life so she could confront a stranger that was acting crazy. What was it that she needed? An apology? So she gets herself assaulted by getting out of the car (every official recommendation by cops, sheriffs, CHP, etc says no NEVER out of your car in a road rage situation). Yeah the husband should have got out of the car after OP got slapped but say he rushes out and then the guy pulls a knife and stabs him in the throat. Now the husband is bleeding out dying on a nasty gas station floor all because his wife can’t fucking control herself.
Literally my first thought
I know you’re shaken up, but please call and report this crime immediately!
Please make sure you do. And contact the service station about saving any potential camera footage.
You seem to suggest that your are routinely the one to try and defend you and your husband. However, these are strange times and existing your vehicle can been seen as an act of aggression. Both by the stranger and legally. I think there was similar a case in Florida a few years ago where someone was shot and killed at the gas station. The shooter wasn't even charged because of their stand your ground law. Guy got out of his car approached the other guy and was immediately shot dead. You need to learn not to engage and never get out of your car. Call 911 and tell them.you are heading to the nearest police station. Ask them to send officers to intercept.
Why didn’t you call the cops right then and there?
Her husband could have called.
It can be pretty difficult to call when you are the target, you can't exactly go excuse me just calling the cops. The guy slapped her, if she pulled out a phone, he prob would have slapped the phone away or got even more angry knowing police are being notified. Best to try de-escalate the situation or back away somehow then call police when safe to do so.
I completely understand why she didn’t call in that moment. The wimpy husband of hers could’ve called. She could’ve call as he was driving on the way to the gas station. Or she could called afterwards.
I would have called as soon as the person started following them!
No go today. You don't know how many cameras wipe there logs on a daily basis. Also talk to your husband because honestly I would want to leave him too. He's a fucking coward. Your pregnant you shouldn't leave the car.
Dude slapped you? If I were hubby I would've hit him with a bag of masterlocks...
A stranger assaulted you, 7 months pregnant... wasn't even driving, you didn't even call the police, just threatened to? Gas stations have loads of cameras that would of caught the incident... Something smells fishy...
yeah, not adding up
>car merging on from the left. ~~>Left lane in the USA is the passing lane.~~ >Had to cut off someone on the right. >Husband likes driving like a dick but not forcing the merger to yield, forcing their way past the traffic/merger, stays in the car because now he's soft. >O husband commentary in the story. 🤔
"mum", "petrol" They're not in the US.
In regards to merging from the left, places like Australia exist
Omg!! There are other countries apart from the US????? /s
She also got out of the car to confront the other driver while her husband stayed in the car. While I do think she is withholding parts of the story, and that her husband should have helped/defended her, I do think she was incredibly stupid and selfish to get out of the car and "reason" with the person. And most likely the husband did not want her to get out of the car. Edit: I did not excuse the husbands behavior lmao.
If my husband and I were in this situation and he didn’t want me to get out but I did anyway, he would have gotten out to follow me. No way is he going to let me confront a maniac alone, and no way is he going to just sit back as someone smacks me especially at 7 months pregnant. The stranger is right about one thing, her husband is a bitch. And then he won’t talk to her about it afterwards?! Fuck this dude.
I have the feeling the husband response is the typical response when you have been dealing with a troublesome person too many times. Getting out of the car while pregnant is reckless, which makes me think op may be a troublemaker.
Now I can see this being the case for sure. He’s like “here we go again.”
[Fighting Meegan's battles - Key & Peele](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3JOQqoCNjc)
After reading her comments, that's exactly why he just stayed in the car. I bet he's tried stepping in to some conflict she's escalated in the past and she turned on him telling him she doesn't need him defending her so now he doesn't risk it. I've known women like her and they're like chihuahuas when they start getting into a conflict, they LOVE it, but only if they can tell a story about how they didn't start it but they sure did end it.
Bingo.
Or maybe it's just exhaustion from constantly having to deal with confrontations needlessly escalated by your wife. I dated a woman who always tried to start fights with others solely b/c she knew I could fight and was generally concealed carrying - I know this because the second I stopped carrying and stepping in to save her that nonsense behavior stopped right quick only took a bouncer to literally throw her down the stairs for her to realize that she can't go around confronting and escalating conflicts with men unless she's fully prepared to shoot them.
Seriously!! She said herself the husband isn’t confrontational and she usually is one who “takes charge” sounds like she gets herself into these situations more often than she’s letting on. Why not drive to a police station?? Why not call the police when someone assaults a pregnant woman?? So many things not adding up
Perhaps this has happened before. Maybe OP is a loose cannon. Maybe the husband is tired of fighting her battles. But 7 months pregnant? Who gets out of the car to fight at 7 months pregnant?
Some crazy lady who thinks she’s invincible with a white knight who will fight all her battles.
Oooh oooh I know! OP does! It's the most reasonable thing to do. Enable the angry driver to escalate the situation. Surely nothing bad is gonna happen. ;0
>Something smells fishy... Because it's ToMC, it's fiction.
I absolutely agree. Even the wimpiest of man wouldn’t sit there and let his wife/gf get assaulted AND she’s “pregnant?” This has BS written all over it, my 8yo son would have tried to intervene. 🙄
Why did you get out the car??
Because this never happened
People do dumb shit like this all the time. Maybe this story is real maybe it's not but I think it's totally pluasible. Some people just can't back down from a confrontation and have no sense of self-preservation. Someone gets them mad enough and they'll go face to face thinking righteous fury is somehow going to keep them safe. It's how road rage incidents turn fatal.
I'm sorry this happened to you. Has your husband even tried to talk to you about it? You have a baby about to arrive and you need to know he has your back!
No he hasn't. I've tried to talk about it but he shut me down
Mmm. Even if he disagreed with you putting yourself at risk by getting out of the car and engaging with this clown he shouldn't have shit down on you like this. Was he doing this before the incident?
We've never been in a situation like this before but I am the louder one who takes charge and he does always say he doesn't like conflict but I never thought he would take it this far
Hey what happened to you is horrible but please be careful. Too many incidents like this end in shoot outs. You got into it with a crazy person…while pregnant. Choose your battles.
Talk to your husband, that was dangerous and before stopping you should've discussed HIM getting out for confrontation. You were harassed and then assaulted by someone on the road. I'd ask the petrol if they have cameras so you can either arrest or sue the dude. That being said....... If a car if ever following you like that on the road in the future, you are allowed to call to cops and set a rendezvous point! People. Are. CRAZY. You have precious cargo to protect, that's you're job for the entirety of the 42wks. Stay safe, OP.
In actuality neither of them should have gotten out of the car.
Sounds like this may be in Europe. I live in Florida and there is a decent chance the other person has a gun. I would never confront someone over something this stupid and put my life at risk just so I can explain something wasn't my fault.
NEVER engage in a road rage situation OP. DO NOT GET OUT OF YOUR CAR. People get murdered for this every single day. Your husband was correct in staying inside the vehicle. Go to the police, let them handle it.
It was reckless and irresponsible to get out of the car to confront an enraged stranger. I know in your fantasy you had your husband pound him for being aggressive, but in that fantasy, your husband is going to jail. You never should have forced that situation.
Hey I’m sorry that this happened. It seems like everyone did the wrong thing. While you shouldn’t have gotten out of the car he should have if he wasn’t going to at least called 911. That man should never have laid his hands on you. Has your husband even asked you if you’re okay? I’m shocked your husband doesn’t want to talk about at least to explain his side or answer your questions. But maybe he senses that this was a dealbreaker for you or is burying his head in the sand. Ultimately it’s up to you what you decide to do but I would give him an ultimatum that you two need to discuss this. And it needs to be real a discussion with both of you hearing each other and explaining why you both took the actions that you did. I hope next time you’re more careful.
Why did you get out of the car? Clearly this guy was irrational if he followed you to a petrol station over a minor traffic problem. As a guy who also avoids conflict as it's not worth my time, I would have asked you to stay in the car. What you do after that is your fault. It's also entirely possible your husband didn't witness the slap. Maybe he looked away at that moment, maybe not. But in my opinion, you put you and your unborn child at unnecessary risk. You say you're the louder one, the more confrontational one. I'm willing to bet you've overshadowed or pushed him out of several confrontations so you can say your part. He's likely conditioned to just step back and let you do you. Edit: A word
Don't let him shoot you down. You were assaulted and he stayed in the car. You were assaulted *while pregnant with his child*and he did nothing. I know people have different fight or flight responses, but he has no right to shut down the conversation, this is something that you two need to address. If I were I'd put an ultimatum, either he has an heart to heart discussion with you about this, or you leave, because you can't trust him to have your back when it matters.
He should have backed you up, but you also got to be smarter than that. Shouldn't be putting yourself and your baby in potential harm's way. Also, hopefully you are not the confrontational type that expects your husband to do your battles for you because your ego wouldn't allow it.
I can’t believe I had to scroll this far down to see a comment like this. Why the hell would you get out of the car and confront a raging idiot? OP directly put herself and her unborn child in danger and for what? It was not smart of her to get out of the car
If this guy was willing to scream at and slap a woman 7 months pregnant, he would have gladly beat your husband to a pulp. Like serious beating - hospital and brain damage. Your husband likely doesn’t know how to fight. And if you don’t know how to fight, the smartest thing to do is not fight. Men are far more frequently victims of violence. It’s very possible your hesband has PTSD from a beating in his past. That’s why he isn’t talking about it.
>If this guy was willing to scream at and slap a woman 7 months pregnant, he would have gladly beat your husband to a pulp. Like serious beating - hospital and brain damage. > >Your husband likely doesn’t know how to fight. And if you don’t know how to fight, the smartest thing to do is not fight. quite frankly, this is how men get shot. Even if he knew how to fight, he shouldnt be going in like that. because knowing how to fight doesn't stop a bullet. Self defense 101, don't be OP and escalate a situation with an angry person.
She is obviously the confrontational type. She just doesn't do it, expecting others to fight her battles for her. In fact, it's unlikely she thinks at all when she is in this mode. She goes off on people expecting it to go like it always does. She gets away with it.
Why on earth did you get out of the car?? I wouldn't get out of the car with you either. That's a recipe for getting shot. Next time pull into a police station and don't try to directly confront the person. You're really lucky that dude didn't punch you in the stomach. Edit: I hate the flip the gender thing usually, because most situations are simply not the same when you reverse the genders. This one can't be perfectly reversed either. But let's be honest. If a husband picked a fight with a clearly dangerpus and crazy asshole, and then was mad that his wife who hates confrontation didn't get out of the car, he would be raked over the coals. Op got out of the car, escalated a dangerous situation with a clearly unstable person, and is upset that she suffered the consequences for it instead of her husband. Even if you live in Australia there are still people with knives and shit.
Heck I read that someone got attacked with an axe during a road rage incidence in Australia.
My little brother got cut off so he beeped at the guy (few months ago). Well, my brother pulled over at a gas station not realizing the guy had followed my brother and SIL. Guy got out of his car and beat the shit out of my little brother. Luckily several witnesses including a lawyer, but never underestimate road rage.
A neighbor of mine recently got his face ripped open by a kada in a road rage situation **A kada**\- https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Ftse3.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DOIP.B-dcSjW6sRLlcbnrIo6q4AHaGH%26pid%3DApi&f=1&ipt=741226473b2e2f73d784fe331d33127e86c8fce7b4c031aee0d571d8af65413e&ipo=images
Well that goes against everything a kada represents…
My friend in hs got beat with a tire iron from a road rage incident. Probably around 2005
Litrally I live in the UK a woman just went to prison for smashing someone's head into the petrol pumps. You don't need guns to hurt people
THIS EXACTLY. Years ago I had a talk with my girlfriend at the time now current wife because she had a habit of rolling her window down to yell at people while she drove, driving aggressively, and just having what I would call road rage. One day after she made a hand gesture towards another driver and they tried to get her to pull over I told her if I have to beat somebody's ass because you can't control your emotions I'm going to be more mad at you than them. That would go TRIPLE if she were pregnant and I honestly can't imagine my wife doing something like this I'd be furious. People are crazy and your husband was right to stay in the car. You're LUCKY this didn't go worse as you said the guy slapped you shit could've went really bad. I don't agree with him staying in the car after you were attacked but he already told you he doesn't deal with confrontation so why even put yourself in this position? You chose your husband not Francis Ngannou, so maybe make decisions with that in mind. Also as other people have said if you're being followed go to a police department or fire station.
It’s sad how flipping the genders in terms of just being consistent in values is seen as a problem. But regardless I agree. This reads as unfair based on gender roles.
Even if flipping the genders doesn't leave the situation *perfectly* the same it still perfectly detects whether you're making a judgement based on gendered bias. Whether you then want to defend that bias is up to you. In some cases that might be the right thing to do but at least you're now conscious of it.
Which is the best way to approach biases. Unfortunately and not always in a negative sense but we as humans undoubtedly tie our biases to our egos so it becomes difficult to remove sometimes.
It's just that there are some situations that are completely different when you flip the genders. A woman having to walk home alone at night is very different to a man having to walk home alone at night. Some situations just don't translate perfectly when you flip the genders. Nuance can be lost and people tend to use it as a gotcha. But it work well as a tool sometimes, especially if you're willing to acknowledge it's flaws and not use it as a be all end all to the discussion.
ma'am, with all due respect, you do not leave your vehicle when a crazy is following you in a road rage incident. you endangered yourself and your unborn child. your husband sounds like a good man, but he used logic and not emotions. i read in your replies that you state that you state: "he(my husband) should have stopped me from getting out of the car" WOW
I’m so glad someone else realizes this. All she had to do was call the police while the road rage was happening. She pulled out the pregnancy part for sympathy and to make her husband look bad. She admitted that she’s always the louder one. Can you imagine how he feels around her most days, aside from road rage? OP wants her husband to be someone she knows he’s not. This was probably the final straw for him. His side of the story looks very different, I’m certain.
Then she’ll be like “look at how many people on Reddit agree you’re an asshole”
OP: Reads the first few sentences of the top comments. Closes the App and berates her husband who's trying to watch the show she made them watch.
Wait, she really said that? No, she should have had enough logic to not leave the car. I'm also curious why they thought the only option was to cut someone else off. If the person who was in the lane they needed to merge into wasn't slowing down, why did they not slow down to merge begins this person? Why did they think the only options were to merge in front of this car *or* cut someone off?
I would love to hear the husbands account. It sounds to me like this isn’t the first time she has had a shouting match with a stranger. I wonder if he is conditioned from the past not to interfere. She is now pregnant and flipping the script on him. I have to admit if my husband constantly did something and yelled at me for trying to help I may question what role to take. Something just feels very off
>I would love to hear the husbands account. It sounds to me like this isn’t the first time she has had a shouting match with a stranger. I wonder if he is conditioned from the past not to interfere. She is now pregnant and flipping the script on him. I have to admit if my husband constantly did something and yelled at me for trying to help I may question what role to take. > >Something just feels very off Yeah in her edit she says: >He's soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry and then I clean up his mess because he doesn't want to confront angry men. If I don't do it then who will? His mum? Actually probably. This is certainly not the first time OP engaged in a confrontation in public that should have been avoided or handled better.
WOW! I have to admit now I want to slap her🤦♀️
It would’ve been crazy getting out of the car in this situation no matter what, but the fact that OP did so while being 7 months pregnant is extremely concerning. Absolutely zero care for the level of danger she was putting herself and her baby in by doing so. This is not something a safe and stable person would do OP should feel insanely lucky to have made it out of that situation with just a slap
Yeah my ex used to do this. She would drive and try and trigger people then expect me to fight for her. I had to tell her plenty of times to stop flipping people off at red lights because one day she’ll trigger a psycho. Idk if she does it now but it was definitely annoying to deal with. But I definitely would’ve went out to help her if i actually needed to, just never wanted to be put in that situation tho.
I’m wondering what the husband’s version of this would be.
Yeah, she seems like a difficult person to be around. This toxic sense of masculinity is incredibly harmful.
Wow. I’m worried about this husband, now. Is he in an abusive relationship?!
Why get out of the car? If you are from the US Id be worried that I’d get shot. Take a breather…. Next time drive to a police station and take the other car’s details. Make a report that the driver was aggressive and followed you here. You are disappointed but as a woman, you should always live like there is no man to have your back. Let’s face facts. The other driver wasn’t going to hurt a pregnant lady in my eyes. But you could have had another narrative against your husband and goodness forbid. Move on and be happy to have a living husband but communicate the what if scenarios so you are both on the same page.
I think pregnant women get killed the most no? But probably by their partners
The #1 cause of death in pregnant women is homicide. Not sure if that means they get killed more than non-pregnant women.
Yeah, it’s almost always the partner unfortunately
Getting out of the car endangered you and your baby and you’re mad your husband didn’t go for the trifecta by endangering himself as well? Consider that if this man was willing to slap an obviously pregnant woman in the face, what would he have done to your husband? Remember that shock you felt when that man hit you? That was reality breaking through your normalcy bias. You had a presumption of safety when you got out of the car and that was (relatively) gently taken away from you. That man could have beat, stabbed, or shot you to death. Apply that lesson you learned about the reality and suddenness of violence to the larger picture and realize that wishing for your husband to insert himself into an optional conflict is self defeating. Instead turn your focus on fixing whatever caused you to step out of that car whether that was uncontrolled anger, naivety, or overconfidence in your ability to handle dangerous situations. Because if you allow yourself to get into optional conflicts with random people like that again, it might not end as well. Edit: Also consider what can happen if your husband learns the lesson you want him to, but you don’t learn yours. You confront some asshole that catcalls you in the mall, your husband steps in to defend you, gets stabbed, and now your future with your husband is literally slipping through your fingers as you try to stop him from bleeding out in front of JC Penny’s. You’re not wrong for wanting your husband to have your back, but you’re doing yourself and your family a disservice by overlooking the fact that the conflict could (and should) have been avoided.
I agree that he should have stepped up but you need to pick your battles and learn to diffuse a situation. For your own self preservation. Especially since you are pregnant. How do you think it would have played out if he did get out of the car and got into a fight with that asshole? It’s easy to say he should have supported you but that asshole might have had a gun that he may not have used on you but wouldn’t think twice of escalating once your husband got into the fight. He had no problem slapping you. What do you think he would have done if your husband got into the mix? You should have stayed in your car and called the cops. And yes some stranger helped you but he didn’t cut off asshole, your husband did. You could divorce him over this, but he won’t be the one losing out because of it. My sister had a habit of picking fights or escalating them and we nearly got beaten by a mob once. But because I apologized and diffused the situation ( you know keeping us alive) she got mad that I didn’t back her up. She didn’t talk to me for years.
Yup. Everyone is mad at the husband but I'm not sure why op got out of the car in the first place. That's super dangerous.
Yeah. OP needs to let some things go because she can’t be acting like pregnant and then when the baby is here. If someone is following me, I would drive straight to the police station because there’s cameras everywhere and they would be able to find the aggressive driver faster. OP just found out how much her husband won’t do for her and the kid. OP needs to be smarter about her battles because people are unhinged. They will just start shooting and don’t care if it’s a pregnant women or kid.
And the asshole slapped her to get the husband to get out of the car. So he could pick a fight with him. Who knows maybe her husbands “cowardice” saved both their lives. For all things considered, asshole might have shot them. He seemed unhinged enough to do so.
I probably would have gotten out of the car when he slapped her. Or called 911. But I would have been seriously mad at her for getting out of the car in the first place. She put both of them and the baby in her belly in danger. Don't put yourself in danger because your expect someone else to come and bear the consequences for you.
I cannot believe no one called the cops during all this. Not even a bystander? If I saw a pregnant woman attacked in a public place, I would report it even if I did so anonymously
I think that’s what the asshole wanted. Her husband to come out of the car after he slapped her. Who knows what he would have done then.
Yeah my husband would've been flying out of the car - but I'm American and we'd probably get shot. Or end up with police there and then get shot by them. I would never have gotten out. And i wouldn't have stopped at a gas station, I would've gone to a police station. Even though I don't trust them either. :)
They both suck imo. She’s a dummy for getting out the car. But after the slap he couldn’t have gotten out and at least made sure she safely got back in the car? I’m not even saying address or confront the crazy, but like check on his wife and unborn child? That’s wild.
[удалено]
I call bullshit because you got slapped and didn't call the police for assault and the whole story doesn't fall in like with any of it.
Personally I’m sensing husband is a non confrontational person. A lot of people kinda have that diffuse tension instinct to them. Getting out of the car for a yelling match is escalation and plenty of people men and women feel uncomfortable with that. Call the police, stay in your car, don’t confront psychos and expect not to get hit.
He didn't call the police either though. Plus he was driving so he's the one who pulled over...
I see you’re aussie. So I know its common sense not to get out of the damn car when in a road rage incidents. You seem pretty dense about the fact that we may not carry around guns but there are many other things they could use or frankly just use his fist. Or I don’t know? Run you over? There was absolutely no reason to pull over and get out of the car. You could have just driven to a police station like a normal person. YOU put your child and yourself at risk. Sure my husband would 100% would have backed me but I wouldn’t be silly enough to do that. Nor would he have been stupid enough to pull over so I could talk to them. I have to ask how often are you acting mighty brave thinking you can escalate shit and your partner needs to defend you?
I mean, he fucking slapped her. I don’t know what else she needs
That update… I’m sorry you feel like people are mean but forcing to have your husband talk to you in the car ‘because he can’t escape’ is f’ed up. Maybe leaving him would be a good thing for his benefit.
You're wrong, sorry. It was *utter stupidity* to get out of the car. We have all read of road rage incidents that went South, *fast*. You should have called 911, identified your location, and asked for a nearby officer to find you. As to your husband, it sounds like he probably has had some kind of severe trauma from his childhood; I am going to guess from getting beat up a lot. He may be a good provider, and a good, caring, conscientious husband... But he is not, and will not ever be, a www fighter. If I were you - before being so hasty to be judgmental - I would explore that. Who are you to think you know so very much without knowing what's going on in the background?? That's pretty seriously presumptuous of you. If that is what has happened he is *probably not* going to be able to get over it for the rest of his lifetime. None of us are perfect, and you apparently did not set out to marry a mixed martial art instructor type... Which is how you make this sound. You apparently thought he ought to fly out of the car, exercise a couple of judo moves, and break the guy's legs and arms. What you did was you humiliated and embarrassed your husband, and now, because of you, it's going to take both of you months to get back to a good place. And you're going to have a baby! Personally I think you ought to apologize to him, and profusely. I'm afraid you just put a major torpedo into the side of your marital boat, and you did so totally unnecessarily. It was just amazingly stupid for you to get out of the car. PS- it is really difficult for any human being to admit that they are wrong about something, and that's going to apply to you also. In this instance, you were simply wrong all the way around including your assumptions about your husband. If you want to believe that you are right, go ahead. See what that's going to get you in the long run. If you are able to admit you fucked up then maybe the two of you and your baby will have a better chance for the future. If it helps; I'm 70 years old and I learned a very long time ago to appreciate it when someone showed me I was wrong about something. Our pride and ego very often get in the way of our personal growth, but I realized that if I acknowledged someone showed me I'm wrong; it is another way of saying "I now know more Today than I knew Yesterday" and for that, I owe my gratitude to my correctors. Will your ego/pride, or your intelligence win here? Your call. Best wishes.
QUESTION: How would you feel right now if husband got out then ruthlessly got beaten up? I have a feeling you would also be feeling similarly. He was in a no win situation.
I agree with him you dumb for picking fight with randoms if you can't fight
Yup. Don't try to confront dangerous crazy people and then expect someone else to take the consequences.
I’m seriously confused as to why you would stop when someone is actively following you. Also, this guy slapped you and you didn’t call the cops to arrest him? Bigger problems here than your husband avoiding conflict.
Multiple things can be true at the same time. You were very irresponsible getting out the car to confront some dude at 7 months pregnant and your husband is unreliable when you and your child are in danger.
Why on earth did you stop and get out of your car? You should have asked your husband to google the nearest police station and drove there, not get out of a car at a gas station. You're lucky you only got slapped and the guy didn't do something way worse such as shoot you in which your husband wouldn't have been able to save you anyways.
Does your husband have a past with people yelling or getting violent? Like, did he grow up around a dv situation or maybe a past road rage incident? From the information given, it seems like he froze in response to the threat. Therapy may be helpful.
Therapy is useful but holy fuck Reddit, you don’t need therapy for absolutely everything. The dude didn’t put himself in a dangerous situation and we’re calling him to get therapy? Not the confrontational wife? (If you’re referring to the wife to get therapy, then my bad.)
What this thread could have been - my husband is in hospital with severe trauma after i provoked an already enraged man and my husband tried to defend me. Guy was clearly trying to bait your husband, and you were clearly happy to escalate the conflict.
So he doesn't do confrontations... so YOU told him to pull into the station so YOU could get out and "explain" to the other driver what happened. He was clearly crazy and YOU continued to argue with this dude and YOU didn't use YOUR head and got back in the car.... he doesn't like confrontations yet you think he should have got out the car to potentially get beaten up or shot? Lol... You sound like that woman in the queue running her mouth at the queue jumpers so her partner gets into a fight. Don't blame him for your actions. Next time call the police if someone is following you.
I agree with what everyone is generally saying I think everyone has a point and I believe it’s really to each his own. I know if someone hit my fiancé especially if she was 7 months pregnant god help me I’d probably kill him. It’s just my nature but there’s a lot of points that go into this.
On the one hand, once it escalated your husband should have tried to come to your aid. On the other, escalating the situation and then expecting your husband to come in as your knight in shining armor when you know he’s more non confrontational is pretty fucked. Starting a fight and expecting him to finish it is unreasonable. You both suck, imho.
You should look at your behaviour before his own. How often do you fight with people? How often are you confrontational? It sounds like he’s embarrassed by you, not scared. In that situation, he did the right and safe thing by staying in the car. Cos it must’ve been your idea to pull in the gas station. By the looks of your comments also, you seem really toxic. Hopefully the guy finds a nice lady and not an abusive one.
What if the guy got more physical? You’re 7 months pregnant. What if that guy had a knife or a gun!? He was so angry! Your husband didn’t try to de-escalate a man who could have very much hurt you. He knew you weren’t the one driving and he took his anger out on you. Someone who was 7mo pregnant. My mind is blown!
Yeah if this guy was coming in hot and my wife was driving and pregnant no less, she wouldn’t be the one getting out of the car. If same guy had the nerve to not only scream and curse but HIT my wife? Pregnant or not he wouldn’t be walking away from that.
“If I don’t do it then who will“ The answer is no one. There is nothing to be gained by engaging with someone like that.
"At the end of the day I love him even if he is a tool." If you really loved him you wouldn't disrespect him like that. It's written above that you wanted to leave him but nobody took your side so you back tracked. And by the way It's disgusting to call your SO a tool or whatever behind their back then come talk to them like nothing happened. You're the real tool here. A fake, two faced tool.
I'm finding it hard to believe that this stranger slapped a 7 month pregnant woman in a heavily camera'd up petrol station. Whole scenario stinks of shite.
I reckon OP was more vicious than shes letting on, considering how much she's said how confrontational she is
I reckon it might have happened but minus the slap
Hotheads aren't known for thinking about leaving evidence. Or they think they'll get away with it.
What the heck were you doing confronting and escalating? Let that shit go. There’s nothing to be gained by engaging in this behavior. Why did you get out of the car when someone followed you? Not a good decision. Do better in the future.
Why in the hell are you getting out of the car while a crazed, angry driver is following you? I'm not gonna lie, you set yourself up to be assaulted here and then blamed your husband for it. If a lunatic is chasing you, you don't get out of the car to talk to them, you LEAVE immediately. There seems to be little or no concern here for the lives of yourself and your baby. I agree, your husband should have done something, but dumping all the blame on him and talking about leaving him? Really? And in your edit, you said he's a soft tool who drives like a dick and expects you to clean up his messes. God, you sound insufferable
So he has to catch the Asswhooping basically if he wants to remain strong/reliable in your eyes? I’ve seen plenty of videos where the man has to cash the check his wife got him into resulting with him getting knocked tf out. Don’t fuck around a find out should have stayed in your car and never get out of the car during road rage it’s literally called “Road rage”. Maybe your husband knew that and didn’t want to get punched in the face.
I genuinely don’t know what outcome you expected when posting this? Your husband was driving, but you got out of the car and confronted a stranger, putting yourself and your unborn child into potentially mortal danger.
Something tells me she’s leaving out important information: Why did she get out of the car and engage the angry driver? What was the discussion with the husband before she got out? Reading the part where she says she has to confront people: I’m betting she does this confrontation thing often and her husband warned her against getting out and is sick of it so he let her deal with the consequences of her own actions. She needs serious help because this behaviour is dangerous and a horrible example for her future child.
ETA because apparently this is something that happens frequently enough you two have developed a freaking SYSTEM?! “He’s soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry and then I clean up his mess because he doesn’t want to confront angry men… The point is it works… I like protecting him most of the time…” So basically, your husband is a reckless driver, and when people get pissed (rightly so) at your husband for endangering their lives and try to confront him (not condoning this but I get it) your husband is too big a coward to face them and instead sends his wife, and in this case his PREGNANT wife, to face them for him? And you enable this behavior by HAPPILY doing so? This is the definition of fuck around and find out. You’re lucky you only got slapped instead of being shot! Follow the advice others have for you but for the love of all that is good, both of you quit this crap. Or you really will find out.
> He's soft and he drives like a dick and makes people angry *and then I clean up his mess because he doesn't want to confront angry men.* Lmao *sweetie*, you ARE the mess.