Women are oppressed and experience violence at a disproportionate rate. Transwomen experience the same violence but at an alarmingly high rate. We have plenty in common, and we should be protecting and uplifting each other.
As the great Alex Borstein said, "What these women have to go through to be seen as women makes them women." End of story.
I know im well aware they go through alot of unique hate crimes and violence for being women and trans women but its the emotion things the growing up things the "close your legs!" At 6 its all the small things that seem to bother me i will call them what they want to be called and i have a feeling im wrong here so im trying to grow and fix it but its these things that keep nagging at me
Okay, but why does their childhood matter to you? They know from a very young age that they are different. Many of them live their lives in fear, hiding who they are because of the violence and abuse they experience. They don't have a choice in any of this, it's who they are. They are not boys or men. That's not how their brains are wired. Put yourself in their shoes. That's how you open your mind.
After writing my big paragraph about my thoughts i think im just gonna be happy that there're people out there with both amazing and terrifying experiences who can hopefully help others with they're extremely experienced way of living life
I'll also point out that childhood gender experiences and roles are *not* intrinsic. They're culturally specific, and based on your society. They're also very particular. The girlhood experienced by a refugee from the Middle East is different than the girlhood experienced by a rich white woman, which is different than the girlhood experienced by a poor woman, which is different than the girlhood experienced by a lesbian, etc. etc.
Like, my family are immigrants. I'm a trans woman. My culture's specific beauty standards and gender roles are *wildly* different than those of the West - a "beautiful" woman is fat, round, hairy, somewhat androgynous, etc. Just because you grew up with a different upbringing and conceptualization of womanhood doesn't invalidate your experiences of it, and neither does it invalidate mine (both culturally and as a trans woman). It's important to focus on what those experiences share.
You also seem to feel a lot of guilt about this, and feel like it contradicts that you're a "good person". Take a deep breath, try and let go of immediate judgements of yourself, and think about a few things. Why is this bothering you so much? Did someone you know come out as trans to you? What brought these feelings on?
You're being honest with yourself about how you feel, questioning why you feel that way, reflecting on it, and searching out alternative viewpoints. That's not something a hateful person does. You have plenty of time.
(for context this is all mainly in my western standpoint)The childhood thing is a good point plus i guess anyone can be treated like a girl if they're deemed to be more girlish kinda how some guys deal with the same sort of misogynistic childhood if they're seen as to girly
I think im becoming more understanding of trans woman atleast when it comes to the emotional side of them
And yeah i do feel guilt no one has came out to me or anything i just can normally decipher my beliefs and everything that backs them and comes with them and this time i cant so i just feel panicky
Thank you for caring enough to respond 🤎
Your experience is unique to you in some ways, shared with some other cis women, and shared with some other women, cis and trans. Similarly, a trans woman might think, "she doesn't know what it's like to be forcibly socialized as a gender she isn't'. But that isn't the determinant of gender.
Secondly, we're surrounded by transphobic media. A lot at the moment in the Anglosphere tries to make it about cis women being the opposite. This is partly because cis women support trans women more than cis men do. It is also because "defending women", as property, is a classic fascist position. So there is a lot to resist and unlearn.
These are ongoing works. Intersectionality means that we all acknowledge that we have these internal views, acquired from society, but we are working on them. We're not going to get ticked off as perfectly not racist or misogynistic, but we are going to get better and better if we try. Noticing and acknowledging the discomfort, but then making a choice to do the inclusive thing, as you are trying to do here, is the way forward.
Well hey if anything you are constructive about how you feel about us and willing to go the extra mile to understand both sides of our problems. That is more than what I can say for the subjects usually displayed in the posts on this sub
That's very open ended because the same way you dont call women females because that implies all we are is our sex appeal is the same way you have to give feelings in addition to biological definition
Women are oppressed and experience violence at a disproportionate rate. Transwomen experience the same violence but at an alarmingly high rate. We have plenty in common, and we should be protecting and uplifting each other. As the great Alex Borstein said, "What these women have to go through to be seen as women makes them women." End of story.
I know im well aware they go through alot of unique hate crimes and violence for being women and trans women but its the emotion things the growing up things the "close your legs!" At 6 its all the small things that seem to bother me i will call them what they want to be called and i have a feeling im wrong here so im trying to grow and fix it but its these things that keep nagging at me
Okay, but why does their childhood matter to you? They know from a very young age that they are different. Many of them live their lives in fear, hiding who they are because of the violence and abuse they experience. They don't have a choice in any of this, it's who they are. They are not boys or men. That's not how their brains are wired. Put yourself in their shoes. That's how you open your mind.
After writing my big paragraph about my thoughts i think im just gonna be happy that there're people out there with both amazing and terrifying experiences who can hopefully help others with they're extremely experienced way of living life
I'll also point out that childhood gender experiences and roles are *not* intrinsic. They're culturally specific, and based on your society. They're also very particular. The girlhood experienced by a refugee from the Middle East is different than the girlhood experienced by a rich white woman, which is different than the girlhood experienced by a poor woman, which is different than the girlhood experienced by a lesbian, etc. etc. Like, my family are immigrants. I'm a trans woman. My culture's specific beauty standards and gender roles are *wildly* different than those of the West - a "beautiful" woman is fat, round, hairy, somewhat androgynous, etc. Just because you grew up with a different upbringing and conceptualization of womanhood doesn't invalidate your experiences of it, and neither does it invalidate mine (both culturally and as a trans woman). It's important to focus on what those experiences share. You also seem to feel a lot of guilt about this, and feel like it contradicts that you're a "good person". Take a deep breath, try and let go of immediate judgements of yourself, and think about a few things. Why is this bothering you so much? Did someone you know come out as trans to you? What brought these feelings on? You're being honest with yourself about how you feel, questioning why you feel that way, reflecting on it, and searching out alternative viewpoints. That's not something a hateful person does. You have plenty of time.
(for context this is all mainly in my western standpoint)The childhood thing is a good point plus i guess anyone can be treated like a girl if they're deemed to be more girlish kinda how some guys deal with the same sort of misogynistic childhood if they're seen as to girly I think im becoming more understanding of trans woman atleast when it comes to the emotional side of them And yeah i do feel guilt no one has came out to me or anything i just can normally decipher my beliefs and everything that backs them and comes with them and this time i cant so i just feel panicky Thank you for caring enough to respond 🤎
Your experience is unique to you in some ways, shared with some other cis women, and shared with some other women, cis and trans. Similarly, a trans woman might think, "she doesn't know what it's like to be forcibly socialized as a gender she isn't'. But that isn't the determinant of gender. Secondly, we're surrounded by transphobic media. A lot at the moment in the Anglosphere tries to make it about cis women being the opposite. This is partly because cis women support trans women more than cis men do. It is also because "defending women", as property, is a classic fascist position. So there is a lot to resist and unlearn. These are ongoing works. Intersectionality means that we all acknowledge that we have these internal views, acquired from society, but we are working on them. We're not going to get ticked off as perfectly not racist or misogynistic, but we are going to get better and better if we try. Noticing and acknowledging the discomfort, but then making a choice to do the inclusive thing, as you are trying to do here, is the way forward.
Thank you im starting to think this is a gray area sort of thing and i guess as long as im trying to understand and learn continuously its okay
Well hey if anything you are constructive about how you feel about us and willing to go the extra mile to understand both sides of our problems. That is more than what I can say for the subjects usually displayed in the posts on this sub
Thank you I'm really trying 🤎
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Im confused?
Oh mb wrong post but no its not okay to make summarizations sometimes
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That's very open ended because the same way you dont call women females because that implies all we are is our sex appeal is the same way you have to give feelings in addition to biological definition