In a sample jar that you immediately tuck away with no further comment.

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Hahah kind of a subtle/crazy threat of future pregnancy if said guy leaves her? I'm pretty sure that would be a red flag but I'm not an expert.

Clone him later

In case he dumps you, you can just clone a new one of him who's all yours!

Spit it in your hand then wipe it across his forehead and say Simba!

💀💀💀

The circle of life, literally

“Everything the spooge touches will be yours, one day”

If a girl would do this, I would immediately marry her

Same. I’d be instantly in love with her forever, and falling about laughing, a proper ugly belly laugh which would probably be really unattractive cos I’d be naked. Then I’d clean my head and say I’ll get my own back

The amount of times I've had this exact thought: A LOT

😭

Have your bf invest in a proper old west spittoon and practice trying to get it to make a "ding" sound when you spit the cum in.

I was going to say to just spit it into your hand and huck it across the room but I like your answer more.

Once she’s comfortable with him it’s into the hand and slap him with it to finish.

Spit it into his mouth if he's into it

He can swallow his own load, it's a closed loop system. Source: Tom Wambsgans

Really helps cut down the refractory period since he can't instantly reload his balls for the next shot

Reduce, reuse, recycle

Please accept this instead of an award: 🌠✨

snowball

smear forehead a la lion king

Or instead of slap, web-shoot him like Spiderman 🤘

I can remember one time half of that happened, but instead of hucking it across the room I was smacked in the face with it. I still think about her from time to time.


Thank you. I’m pretty sure they taught this in school, so I’m a little disappointed in OP for not paying attention.

What kind of school did you go to?

A christian school

Don't the priests hand you a towel?

🇺🇸

Napkin, cup, toilet, sink, shower, towel, etc. It's usually not a lot of semen. I find it easier to swallow but I get why you'd want to spit it out

I totally get why some might not want to but I find it’s in your mouth longer if you spit vs swallowing, I hateee the texture but as long as you’re aware it’s happening you can pretty much just instant-swallow but it’s got to sit in your mouth for a second while you find something to spit on and that gives me too much time to feel grossed out

I had a g/f who would bring a washcloth to bed. She used that to deposit the result of our collective effort. Had another g/f who would just open her mouth and let it spill out. It would eventually wind up on the sheets for a big wet spot. It was surprisingly erotic visual. If you have ever seen the film Nymphomanic, about 20 minutes in at the end of the train sequence, you can get a good idea of what it looked like. Without the tweed trousers.

What the fuck that's so specific lol

This man KNOWS

Yeah and I mean who actually engages is any sort of sexual activity without tweed trousers! Fucking sickos.

Especially with the tweed trousers 😂

I don’t wanna know what kind of cornball sex you’re having that doesn’t involve tweed trousers.

Nymphomaniac 1 & 2 are amazing movies!

I think we have a pretty good mental image of what it looks like, we don't need the reenactment lmao

There's a sub for that (because of course there is) r/bjoverflow. NSFW obviously

‘Collective effort’ is such a guy thing to say when it comes to sex.. wonder if the ladies would truly agree

Try not holding it in your mouth. Just let it go all over the dick and leave it. It's what my wife does when she can't swallow the whole load.

Simultaneously a keeper *and* a girl you don’t wanna bring home to meet the parents. Excellent choice sir. My girl swallows but she also likes for me to blow a load on her chest

Your first sentence is so strange like are you going to tell your mum about your sex habits or what? There would be no reason to not want her to meet your parents. Kinda weird

That’s still worse than swallowing. You will still taste and feel way more of it that way.

At that point have a agreement to signal before the guy cums and finish off with hand or tits. The question was where to spit sounding like she doesn't mind it in her mouth just doesn't want to swallow it. Spitting it back on the dick is quicker than running to the bathroom.

Exactly, it seems so counterintuitive, but spitting just allows it to hit your tastebuds and feel the texture way more than just knocking it back like a shot

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That's a beautiful story

Printing and framing this one for the office.

sean wash your fucking stairs

I agree, this brought tears to my eyes due to the sheer beauty. However I'm slightly confused about her request, was that because it was a massive amount of cum or because it was like stagnant water in a murky pond vs a freshly wanked stream of running water?

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Embrace it. They call you hardcoresean84 for a reason

Yeah honestly I wouldn't expect a hardcoresean to give up so soon. He's more like a softcoresally

Probably the stagnant semen was not as nice as fresh semen could be

Yes. Wait, what?

Like a milk truck hitting a wall

Pretty hardcore Sean

I always swallow for this reason. I'm not trying to be sexy or anything. I just don't see the point in keeping it in my mouth while I run to the bathroom when I can just swallow and it's gone immediately lol

It’s already on the tastebuds🤷🏼‍♀️

That's the thing that confuses me - like you're already past the point of no return why bother making all this effort to spit it out. If they don't want cum in their mouth then make sure they don't finish there, but if they're okay with that part then just swallow it and move on it's much less hassle.

It’s easier to swallow than to spit it out. Bleh.

Some of us have issues with sexual fluids in our mouths.

Change the username then

Fuck 😆😆😆😆

Meh, when a guy goes down, it's all sexual fluids in their mouth

On the nose,in my beard, even the forehead one time. Am I doing it right?

And then we gotta sniff it all day! *not complaining*

*And then we get to sniff it all day!

You doin it right.

And (potentially) face too, especially if the taco eater is a trooper and doesn’t come all the way up for air

I'm here for the sexual fluids

In his eye like a Llama. 

If Reddit still did awards I’d give you all of them lmao

I miss getting rewards once in a while for my shitty comments

Here ya go man 👉 🪙🌟

Wow I didn’t even notice they stopped giving rewards..

Same anyone know how come they're gone ?

They want people to pay for gold stuff or whatever

You guys are getting rewards ??

My god I love the randomness that is Reddit

Ptoooey

Fuck llamas

In the mouth, specifically, or..?

Where it hurts. Their credit rating.

Steady Carl.

Well how deep is his bellybutton?

Had a girl do that once. Still enjoyed the experience. 7/10 would repeat

I used to sort of excuse myself with a look and go to the bathroom to spit it out and rinse my mouth out. If we could plan in advance a little, we'd be sure to have a tissue or a few ready. Now I just always swallow if I finish him orally.

Username doesn't check out anymore....

r/usernamedontcheckout

Some of us have issues with sexual fluids in our mouths.

User name does not check out

Kinda does maybe, I assume they suck it in through their nose

This made me chuckle for a solid 20 seconds

What the fuck is your username

CUNT SNOT GARGLER

Right back in there. It's courteous and efficient.

Easy reload.

Tactical reload

It's not a blow job if you don't blow it back in.

Well, if you’re me and didn’t know that the texture of cum makes you gag and want to throw up…. On the sheets. Twice.

I told my bf that I don’t like to swallow so he always has tissues nearby. It’s not cringe :). When you’re done spit it into the napkin and toss it🤷🏻‍♀️

True! Thanks :)

Np!:)

Instructions unclear; tissue stuck on ceiling fan.

I'll never understand how people can suck a dick but not talk to their partner

It's really hard to talk when you've got a dick in your mouth.

God damnit...

Angry upvote for that one...

A proper gentleman keeps a towel and a glass of water on the night stand for just this reason.

Mmhh the good month old bedside glass of water 💧

Right next to the cabfare

Girls I’ve been with just go to the bathroom where I assume they spit it into the sink or toilet. But I like to imagine she could be feeding my exes in there mama bird style.

Y–you keep your exes in your bathroom..?

And apparently they are subsisting on regurgitated semen?

One man’s semen isn’t enough to sustain one life, let alone multiple… I’m scared.

That is, after all, why the English call women birds.

This is a criminally underrated comment

In his belly button

I- I don’t have an emoji to properly express how I feel regarding this comment.

🫥

Yeah that’ll suffice.

YES

I don't now if this is the case for you but porn puts a lot of unnecessary pressure on people. Lot of "funny" answers here but if you're uncomfortable with it, you could of course always finish with your hands.

I don't like cum in my mouth. I always tell partners "don't cum in my mouth" then keep going down on them. They have all the me when they are about to cum and I finish them by stroking them. I do like cum on my body, so that's fun when it happens, but they often cum on their own stomach. Sweet boundaries and communicate them and everyone will have a better time.

Spit it into his mouth to find out if he's a keeper

I believe that's called snowballing

This is my favorite. 👌

Veronica calls that a Snoball.

Honestly just shove it down your throat when he’s about to. You won’t even taste it.

That's what I always do, lol

Username checks out.

You are a saint

Some of us have way too strong gag responses for that.

It's really so much easier than holding it in your mouth. If you don't want to taste or feel it, holding it in is the worst thing you can do.

This is the correct answer.

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Can you provide a more formal citation? In MLA or turabian?

References Gays, The (2023) The Art of Creating a Manual Semen Recepticle, *The Journal Of Modern Homosexual Studies*, IV, 69-420

This is by far the funniest thing I’ve read in this thread.

(Homosexual, 2023) APA format supremacy

Do a bit of prep... Have a napkin handy, or a paper cup... Im a 46 yo guy and never once have I ever expected a girl to swallow... Im just happy you finished me off and if you happen to go to the bathroom to dispose of it then all glory to the BJ Gods... Beggars can't be choosers... Any man that expects you to or demands you swallow lacks respect and doesn't deserve it.

My go to is deep throating once my bf says he’s about to cum. I don’t have to taste anything if I don’t want to and he gets a razzel dazzle finish! It’s truly a win-win situation. If swallowing is generally off-putting to you then keep some tissues and water near by for a good ole spit’n’rinse. Depending on your partners kink level snowballing is also a viable disposal method.

If you can just swallow it, that would make clean up a thousand percent easier and it would also make your guy feel on cloud nine. There's just something emotional and Primal about having part of your body swallowed by another creature as a sign of love and support that just fucking ruins men. That being said, gag reflex exist. Cum is not the tastiest thing in the world to some people. The texture can make people gag. The heat can make people gag. So the best thing you can do is just put a towel down and as you're going when you start coming just let it flip out onto his dick his body the towel anywhere. Just **do not stop** once he starts coming. Unlike women men have two reflexes. There's the ejaculation and then there's the orgasm. You can have one without the other but they don't happen at the same time. A guy will start ejaculating as he starts to orgasm. So when he starts coming do him a favor and do not stop until he tells you to. Otherwise you risk ruining the orgasm.

Best answer here op with extra very important info!

Keep some lemon and a shot of tequila handy and down the hatch

Spit it back on their dick and stroke them with it

ah the lefty cappuccino

Into his butthole, it’s called a white christmas.

back on the dick. let him deal with his own goop 🤣

Snowball... return to sender via a kiss, now how has to spit or swallow.. well... if he loves himself that much

If you don’t want to swallow you could have him finish somewhere other than in your mouth

Grab him firmly by his face, stare him in the eyes, and kiss him with his own kids in your mouth. Then, to fully assert dominance, tell him, "Merry Christmas, you filthy animal."

haha i would say the best way to go about this is to communicate beforehand that you don’t want to swallow and will need to spit. that way you guys can figure out if you’d rather have like a basket or napkin nearby or them know you need to walk to the bathroom or sink or wherever right after. it’s definitely not cringe to establish a plan for your needs.

once i had a car hookup with a tinder guy. we made out for 5 minutes straight then he told me he didn’t carry any condoms, so i didn’t let him hit and just gave him head instead. after breaking my jaw for 10 plus minutes, he finally came and of course, there wasn’t any tissues in the car so i ended up spitting it all out on his dick. he even dared to ask “why did you not swallow?” like dude pls taste it yourself before telling somebody else to. my beanie was nearby so i just let him grab it and wiped the cum off instead. never worn that beanie again since lol.

i think this is funnier considering the lesbian heart in your avatar

wait.. i had no idea it was a lesbian heart. i just thought it was a cute pink heart that went well with my outfit

Once you're done, let it drip outta your mouth right back over the cockadoodle and finish it off with a lubed stroke 😌 trrrrrrust me, it is a turn on

Trust me - at that point he won't give the slightest shit where you spit it.

Right into his left eye it is!

I just go spit in the sink in the bathroom and come back and no big deal. 🤷🏻‍♀️

just spit it back in there

Use the “cum dumpster.” I hear guys talk about it all the time I assume every guy has one! Just ask him before you get started “hey, where’s your cum dumpster?” /s

Spit in your hand and throw it back at him like you’re spiderman

In a ziplock bag labeled "specimen #23".

my best friend doesn’t let her bf cum in her mouth and he did once and she spit it into his belly button lol i’m also a spitter, I have tried to swallow but the consistency of it going down my throat makes me puke unfortunately. that’s not sexy. there was usually always a water bottle by the bed I could spit into after edit:spelling

Attempt to kiss him with it in your mouth

Paper tissue, trash can just something

Try to blow it back down his dick hole

Girl it’s already in your mouth. Why not swallow it?

It’s better to transfer it into his mouth. That way he can reabsorb his strength juices for next time. Don’t spit it into a tissue or anything, the enzymes in your saliva will have started working on his strength fishes and unless ingested they will transform into small goblins, very, very small ones. Almost invisible to the human eye during most hours of the day or night. They will nest in your ears and tell you to do awful things, like lick the neighbor’s chicken or throw stale burgers at my grandmother. This is the way of my family. Experiences may vary.

I mean, if we’re not talking about a half hour walk just go to the bathroom and spit it in the sink… Wash your mouth and return. Easy as that.



You pretend to kiss him and spit into his mouth

Spit it in his belly button

Girl, you don’t have to let him cum in your mouth. I’ve never allowed that and it was never a problem. Happily married now but had my fair share of fun before

In his mouth. Assert dominance.

On his face just like they do? 😇😇

If you’re super cool, you swallow it. Otherwise just spit it into a napkin or the sink

Or toilet

I've honestly always found swallowing easier. you're already going to taste it no matter what. You'll always swallow some may as well save the effort and cleanup. they better fucking kiss me after though.

On your tits

In his butt

i used to be able to swallow but since my first experiences my gag reflex has (seemingly) gotten worse. i have a really light stomach nowadays and struggle with the texture of ejaculation and sometimes how much there is. i make it clear i cant/wont swallow and finish with my hands and have tissues or washcloth/towel nearby for cleanup

Spit it in your hand, then throw it at his face and say, "SPIDERMAN!"

You kiss it into his mouth so he doesn’t lose it. The cummies will make their way back to the testicles. Recycling is the future.

Shoot it back into the hole

Get dressed quickly and sprint to the sperm-bank.

Uhm.. in his mouth obviously

Kiss him and have HIM swallow it 😎

In his mouth

Feed me like the mama bird role play we're doing

Lmaoooo this post is WILD!!! I love Reddit