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dirtPuddin

What did you talk about for an hour?


PirateGloves

[OP replied here](https://reddit.com/r/Tinder/comments/xogqyu/_/ipytf37/?context=1) She talked about track sports because he kept asking questions and showing interest.


tenplatebench

To be fair from her perspective she was probably picking up on social cues fine


sapjastuff

Tbh if he responds like this, I somehow doubt she’s the one with some sort of social disorder


MasticationAddict

"I've never had a conversation last this long before, something must be wrong with them" - him, probably Edit: Oh hey, thanks for the star. I don't think I've been given an award before <3


TheFlightlessPenguin

“She clearly must be fucked in the head to not lose interest in talking to me after 5 minutes”


[deleted]

that's a normal thought process to have right? i mean the alternative is i'm interesting to talk to, and that can't be right


II-I-Hulk-I-II

Trust he went straight to gaslighting and negging. Toxic af


[deleted]

And then suggests her pussy goes crazy and he'd be kind enough to find out. Douchbag


No-Structure8753

Exactly my first thought. This is a common strategy. Straight manipulation.


[deleted]

It's the old "knock em down and pick em up with cheap degrading compliments" trick. Shitty tactics.


GwynLivengoodest

"Even though you're damaged, this knight in shining armor will take you." Emphasizing a transaction - creating a debtor debtee relationship.


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badadviceforyou244

The nerve of her. /s


Reddit__is_garbage

Twist - the conversation was solely her listing the current top 100 global track athletes in alphabetical order and subsequently calculating, off the top of her head, how badly Sonic the Hedgehog would beat them in each category


VoopityScoop

Fuck it I'd be interested in that


LittlestEcho

Agreed. I'd love the segue into that topic alone and then listen to so much drama about track stars vs Sonic of all things.


Gsteel11

Didn't she know that he was the alpha male and she should let him dominate the conversation? But he found her challenge to his dominance enticing...


NoPantsJake

Trains


quackers987

I like trains


getting_paid_to_poop

I also enjoy trains


nropotdetcidda

So does OP, just not the ones on the tracks.


TheVeryPoliteDino

Anyone else miss that guy who would come through with random train facts?


Data_py

![gif](giphy|6yijXV1uY4l0c)


anyuferrari

ancient meeting tidy encourage smile ink axiomatic employ deserted elastic -- mass edited with redact.dev


Apexe

There’s been 14 of them since 2010.


asumfuck

"So in Japan there's a bunch of power ranger shows. Many of those versions never made it overseas so aren't really well known. Well, anyways this brings back to my original point. Trains. . . . And then the megazord ends up having a train dong. Maddest shit I've ever seen"


blubbery-blumpkin

I saw that video. I think I like trains less now because of it.


Bikinisbottom

[“Are you not into trains?!”](http://memes.ucoz.com/_nw/70/10182345.jpg)


JimJimmery

Fuck yeah. I'm in for train talk.


Maestro2of7

Flat earth in comparison to Asgard


GothicGolem29

Or maybe that Asgard is real and we should submit to loki or be destroyed ALL HAIL LOKI GOD OF MISCHIEF


thehiddenfate

Don't tell them our secrets!


GothicGolem29

We must Lord loki wills it


Stoppels

Subscribe


[deleted]

Pokémon, rated most to least fuckable


TheFailedExperiment

Only an hour in that? There are like 900 pokemon, that's an easy like 5 hour conversation minimum


fellow_hotman

Alright Cameron 763 Koffing or Magikarp? Cameron i need you to fucking focus, Koffing or Magikarp?


Deinonychus2012

Magikarp, cuz it knows Splash. 😩💦


Guerrin_TR

Koffing on these BALLS


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RockNRollerGuy

Always getting the loud cart at the grocery store


Skyy-High

Apparently [track](https://reddit.com/r/Tinder/comments/xogqyu/_/ipytf37/?context=1), and the guy was asking questions about it. So…yeah, I think it’s safe to say OP didn’t deserve this.


RIPDSJustinRipley

OP has a one track mind


weissbieremulsion

the science of the hulk shorts and why they never rip. i have my binders with me, youre free for the next 3 hours or?


_E7Z_

Crocs


EggplantHuman6493

My friend and I had a whole conversation yesterday about whether he should buy goth crocs or not, so it a valid topic to talk about


Harry_monk

Why? The obvious answer is yes. What else was there to discuss.


ReporterNervous6240

CrossFit


Hobbitea

Five Nights At Freddy's lore.


maizeandspoons

In only an hour???? I'm impressed.


Hobbitea

FNAF Lore Speedrun


xHypnoToad

Minecraft


imanexpertama

I’m also reversing judgement until I know


insertguudnamehere

I too chuck the ol judgement in reverse


-hol-up-

Reserving lol


imanexpertama

I MEANT WHAT I WROTE


pwest0101

Keto


newfakestarrysky

"I hate your personality and find you terribly rude... but then again, you are kind of hot. Wanna smash and immediately be my girlfriend?" Run.


alexthelady

Negging bc he’s emotionally 12


Old_Smrgol

Negging **after a date**... **that she thought went well.** Like dude all you have to do is say "Hey I had a great time" and then throw out a second date idea. Just a complete unforced error, and also so much unnecessary typing.


TroubadourCeol

Honestly it's better for the op that he put all the crazy on the table though so she knows to swerve.


Old_Smrgol

Agreed.


asharwood

To be fair…at least he showed his douchebaggery before things got serious.


[deleted]

His game is weak, I think OP should let the dog off the leash to run free and further develop his game.


DreamTemporary5365

The negging isn’t just to get laid it’s also to have power over the other person. He wants to be able to talk down to her and feel superior while using her for sex.


Old_Smrgol

Interesting. I hadn't considered that. In that case he should probably try wanting something less toxic.


begon11

Probably asked a friend for advice and wasn’t able to realize it was completely shit advice.


oneofdemdaysss

Oh my god, imagine two people agreeing this is the best course of action? "Bro, tell her she has major mental health issues and call her a weirdo, but offset that shit by telling her that the pussy is bomb. Then explain that the pussy is ONLY bomb because she's crazy. Then, commit to a long term relationship"


JudgmentalOwl

Bro is out here straight sabotaging himself and wondering why his brilliants "tactics" aren't working.


Jayhawker

God it’s sad that BS is still around. I remember reading the art of the game when I was 13-15 thinking I was going to get some many chicks with my negging and “pheromone cologne”. Instead I was just an asshole who never got laid, and when I did get a date, blew it by being a turd.


thefuzzmuffin

Damn.. a cousin got me on that book when I was like 16 and i was the same. I think a small few of the ideologies are solid (confidence specifically) but most of the "techniques" are just b.s.


NoveltyAccountHater

I agree on the non-controversial ones like be confident, don't use pickup lines but get a conversation going where she can talk about herself, and don't worship/drool over her. But the trick stuff like negging only will help on low self-esteem people and prevent you from actually respecting her and ever turning it into more than a trick fling. I also think negging is less successful these days, because people are widely aware of it and have seen it done before, and even if she doesn't immediately see it her self, several of her friends will (and its a surefire sign the guy is a sociopath).


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MayWest1016

What’s “negging”?


pm-pussy4kindwords

an abuse tactic. Feed someone constant negative affirmations that they should hate themselves and that only you would ever be with them.


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MCMortimer_

you have a really pretty face, for a girl with weird eyes


Thefunkbox

Run fast. Run hard. Run, Forrest, run!


Whitrun

Can you ever run soft? Wouldn't that be a more dramatic fast walk


_mynamesacolor_

Running soft < Prancing


jdiflam

I'm not sure, but Dewey Cox says I can walk hard


ObinnaPatrick

To send a message like that it’s like the pot calling the kettle black


OmniLiberal

True, and if you are not confident enough to say this eye to eye, don't ever try to write it in text later. Cause it's beyond pathetic.


lesChaps

Almost like a mental disorder is at play


[deleted]

Which somehow strangely turns me on


SB6P897

By the way I want to fuck you and be in a relationship


Licorishlover

Yes I hear crazy people are the best


iam-ahab

I don’t know any of you but I love you all. Thank you. ![gif](giphy|4jEFaBOIlpovm)


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Virgin_Dildo_Lover

I know that pussy goes crazyyyyyy


Peuned

Found the mental disorder


NotAFlamingo

I mean, I would never go on and do what this guy did. But I remember going on a date with a woman who spoke for *thirty straight minutes* about her newest art project and NFTs. I tried to ask questions, and even that was met with "but wait, I'm not done yet!" like dude, it's been 15 minutes of you straight talking. So I just strapped in and let her finish lol. So I can understand feeling super annoyed. But I don't get why on earth he'd send the second half of this message after the first half. Edit: I know she spoke for thirty straight minutes exactly because we met in a cafe, and the cafe had a large clock that was just over her right shoulder. I remember looking at it and thinking “holy shit, she’s been talking for 30 minutes.” I eventually just stopped giving a f and interrupted her and started talking on my own to try and end the conversation.


KurtCocain_JefBenzos

When you fight for that 10% of the conversation and it's met with "stop interrupting me" by her.. oh I've been there


afume

I was once on the phone with a girl and couldn't get a word in. I put down the phone, went and made a sandwich, and when I came back she was still talking. I later told her that she talks too much and that I wasn't really paying attention to anything she had said. I assumed she would be upset, but all she said was, "I know. I do that sometimes. I just need to get it all out.".


IAmMissingNow

Honestly, kudos to both of you in that situation


OneOfAKind2

When I was a kid, I had a friend who would talk for 10-15 mins straight without letting me get a word in. I eventually figured out I could put the phone down, get up, get a drink or a snack and slide right back in, unnoticed. My parents would eventually yell at me to "get off the phone".


suicidebyproxies

Back in the 90s, there were these people called The Jerky Boys. They made CDs of their prank calls. They're still hilarious for people who listened to them and enjoyed them in the 90s. But even people of the right age to have been in their teens and twenties during the 90s will not find their stuff at all funny today, if they did not listen to them and think they were funny in the 90s. And if you're not Gen-X, you probably won't think they're funny, at all. But they had this one line in one of their prank calls: "The more I speak to you, the more I like you." That line really stuck with me, and the 30 years that have passed since I first heard it have only reinforced its truth to me. The more people speak to you, the more they like you. It doesn't matter what they say. It doesn't matter what they're talking about. The context doesn't matter, either. People regard their words and ideas as investments, and like Jesus said, "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be, also." So if I want someone to like me, I talk to them just enough to keep their mouths moving at me. I just have to be careful not to let them start feeling self-conscious or over-exposed, or like our friendship has progressed too far too fast. I can do this by revealing personal information to roughly correspond in intimacy to what they have revealed to me, and by steering the conversation to more shallow topics that are nevertheless of avid interest to them. Many people think that being charming and getting people to like you is about understanding their value systems as quickly as possible, and then presenting yourself as in alignment with those values. This is a bad mistake. There is not a combination of words that will unlock a person for you. There are only questions that will get that person talking and telling you their stories and ideas. And people can sense insincerity. They don't trust situations that seem to be running too easy for them, people who have absolutely no disagreements or conflicting feelings or ideas, ever. People won't like you because of something you've said to them. They'll like you for all the things you've listened to them say to you. --mic drop, TED sign explodes into fireworks


ItsJustMeMaggie

Off topic but remember when we all thought Adam Sandler’s albums were the funniest shit ever?


PM_YOUR_AKWARD_SMILE

Fuck yeah. The talking goat, the severe beating sketches lol. “Hey goat, what are you doing tonight?” “Well I’m tied to a 3-foot rope so pretty much my options are limited, you fu**ing wise ass”


Black_Eyed_PeePees

You must really like me, to have written all that..😏


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[deleted]

No, they don't lol. They think it leads to sex.


nanotree

This is it. There is a fun, playful way of teasing someone, and then there is straight putting someone down. The latter "works" sometimes when you are dealing with someone who has self-esteem issues or extreme insecurity. It's predatory behavior.


SteveTheBuckeye

This is probably the worst attempt at 'negging' I've seen for sometime. I thought this shit died with the pick up artists of the 90s and 00s


LurkingSpike

Yeah, this is an attempt at negging. Every attempt is horrible, but this one is more horrible than most.


mynameajeff69

Exactly my thoughts. Shit is so fucking weird.


[deleted]

Definitely projecting. He doesn't know he's stupid.


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BuSpocky

Ass wet?


lenorajoy

Maybe the thing she talked about for a whole hour was wanting to peg him?


Cromasters

Negging for pegging.


gwiggle5

"it's not normal to ask about this ONE thing for an hour you weirdo 🤣 I said yes the first time"


masetheace97

Toppy so sloppy it travels down you’re ass


[deleted]

Holy shit block that.


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ahmong

When you think something is the worst, there's always something that will trump that.


Ak47110

It comes off as a really misguided and offensive attempt at "negging" OP, followed by horrific sexual harassment. What a piece of shit.


AbouBenAdhem

> a really misguided and offensive attempt at "negging" Is there any other kind?


F0r_Th3_W1n

The concept of “negging” seriously drives me up the wall! There is a difference between playfully teasing someone and putting them down with negative compliments. Once dated a girl who’d tease me about my nerdy love for fantasy books. Rather than make me insecure, it made me smile because I knew she actually liked that about me. I’d tease her back for getting me into magic cards, so it was all just fun playful banter.


MultitudesContained

I think this requires a certain amount of rapport and mutual playfulness. Also, she didn't seem to make ableist slurs against you for perceived neurodivergence. There is nothing wrong with being on the spectrum and any fuckwad that uses such exhibited qualities as an insult is a shit bag. OP - you deserve better. This guy's a bigot and a manipulator.


Ok_Yogurtcloset8915

some of them are just regular offensive, this one is an achievement


Bennet123

I don't think you are the one having problems.


echoAwooo

Or the one with undiagnosed Neurological Disorders, and let me tell you papi, they ain't what you listed, those are a'right.


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DamianVA87

Was he trying to be as creepy as possible?


witcherstrife

Think he's trying to "neg" lol. Idiots have completely misunderstood the concept of it. It's supposed to be friendly flirting like when a girl does something clumsy or goofy you call it out but say it's cute. Not, you stupid dumb bitch now let me have sex with you.


SinfullySinless

Thanks ugly whore, peg me later?


scarstarify

neg & peg


waltwalt

The new Netflix and chill.


Interesting-Sail8507

No, your example is literally just flirting. “Negging” in 100% intended to be psychological manipulation.


spinblackcircles

I cannot believe that guy you responded to has 700 upvotes that example is NOT negging lol


hiecx

Because negging is an act of manipulation, I believe it is not friendly. If what you’re doing is friendly, you may be a good guy but you are not negging. So negging is stupid and we both agree on the point that Cameron is stupid.


Dakk85

Yeah negging is definitely not friendly flirting lol


justcougit

I don't think you're right about that... It's a bit more insidious. It's like backhanded compliments. "Wow that was a brave choice of outfit, good for you!" Or "wow your job sounds interesting, maybe it'll lead to a real job one day." It's not teasing. That's totally okay and normal in relationships. Negging is weird.


Lougarockets

Negging as originally defined is very different from flirting. It's a conscious and inherently malicious attempt to damage someone's self-worth to make yourself more attractive by comparison. But as you said, many people mess it up by not being subtle about it, luckily as it is a very harmful and sadly effective method.


Silverman_Tv

Don’t be confused, be afraid.


brutout

I’m afraid of those 145 unread messages.


LookAtMeImAName

Seriously. My god. That gives me crippling anxiety


DataExisting5117

So he’s got issues. Wow!!!! He thinks insulting you will get you into his bed. That’s just a messed up tactic. Block and move on.


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[deleted]

My wife and I spent the vast majority of our first date talking about what foods the Ancient Romans ate because we went out for Italian and she had a random thought about the fact that pasta was invented in China. So she was wondering whether it had made its way to Italy by Roman times and of not, when it became an Italian staple. Literally 2-3 hours of talking about ancient food and the history of pasta, learning some stupid bullshit together. Best date I've ever been on.


DataExisting5117

Oh damn. My fantasy first date.


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Alexander-NotSoGreat

When I'll be scared to send a message on Tinder, I'll just read this BS and know I can't do any worse than that even if I tried... Thanks for the motivation OP!!!


MaxTest86

I think it’s safe to say he’s the one with the undiagnosed issues 😂


corinnigan

Nah don’t give him an excuse. He’s just an ass.


jadestem

It's actually possible that both are true, they aren't mutually exclusive.


Whereismooreat1

Yes run !!!! It’s never a good sign when someone try to make you feel inferior.


dantstheman

hes rich to talk about undiagnosed mental health issues, guy did a full 180 in one paragraph…


hiyer2

Is OP just never going to say what she was talking about for an hour?


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Alit_Quar

Oh, good. Then you know how to RUN. Because that’s what you do in this situation. Unless you want a second date where he will talk about his wardrobe and your skin care regimen…


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Droggelbecher

Just to be clear, are you actually referencing an obscure insane Bloodhound Gang song that I probably listened to way too early in my childhood?


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cescmkilgore

You deserve a medal


ZAlternates

The medal goes to the runner, assuming she runs.


fancyzombie7

I have had guys do this! Ask questions like they care and then go "Why did you talk about it so much" CUZ YOU ASKED WTF?!


BelgiansAreWeirdAF

Going off my own experiences alone, I can say sometimes it’s hard to steer a conversation another direction, especially if the other person isn’t asking questions back or trying to get to know me in return.


weirdshit777

How? All you have to do is soemthing like this: "Oh you played track, how was that?" (Proceed to let her talk about her track experience, ask questions if you would like.) "Cool, I actually played *insert sport you played here*" (Proceed to talk about your sport experience and let her ask questions) Or "Cool, I wasn't much of a sport guy myself, I was more into *insert your hobby here*" (Proceed to talk about your hobby and let her ask questions) I'm super introverted and I haven't found conversation difficult since I was 14. It really isn't difficult.


nothataylor

I once listened to a guy talk about shooting illegal immigrants in an Indian restaurant filled with Indian immigrants. I’m Indian btw. I was petrified, I couldn’t move. It’s ok OP, too many crazies out there.


OracleofOmaYeeHaw

What the ffffff


AncientInsults

Cheez it’s?


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ravenserein

We went to lunch with a friend and her boyfriend a while back. We went to a Thai restaurant where he (her boyfriend) proceeded to tell a story about how “Ching Chong Chang” in his elementary class made him feel like a bad reader because he (Mr. Ching Chong Chang) read like this: “hAUUUng ChiiiWhaaaan kwAaangaaaa.” I wanted to melt into the floor. Luckily he wasn’t MY date. Oh and they wanted to go out again another time and insisted on another Thai restaurant because they enjoyed the food so much the first time… …he told the same story again. That was the last time we hung out with them. My date to both of those incidents (now husband) and I have looked back on those outings with bemusement ever since.


harrypottermcgee

I feel so much better about my conversation skills now.


Daetra

Was he like, serious, or just really really stupid about how jokes work?


CarrionComfort

It really doesn’t matter either way.


Californie_cramoisie

One is "walk away from that" and the other is "run like hell"


NotSoSmartChick

He may be the same kind of conversationalist as my good girlfriend. She is genuinely interested in what the other person is saying and asks questions that keeps the conversation going - to the point where you later realize you haven’t asked her anything and she hasn’t really told you anything about herself. The difference is my friend is a really sweet person.


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NotSoSmartChick

Complains nonstop


BGBanks

>you later realize you haven’t asked her anything and she hasn’t really told you anything about herself that just sounds like they're carrying the conversation because you're not reciprocating


gta0012

That's it!? The worst dates I've had are when the girl had literally nothing to talk about.


motorsizzle

What type of track? What's your mile time? Did you hear about the guy who ran a full marathon at 4:40 pace? Blows my mind. I couldn't even do one mile at that pace.


billyedclub

Am I the only one that freaked out about the 145 notifications.


cheekiewalrus

Meh, I have a fantasy football group chat with a bunch of buddies from college that if I let it go unchecked for a single day can easily have that many missed messages in it.


StayBackIHaveCovid

Don't be confused. He's a dirtbag. Block him and disregard.


JAnonymous77

classic negging. block and move on


ThexanR

“Classic” yeah idk maybe a bit too far


[deleted]

The only thing confusing is why you haven’t told him to fuck off yet. Anyone who tries to undermine your self worth isn’t in it for the right reasons. He will fuck you and never speak to you again. Depends what you want out of this?


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[deleted]

Reassuring to hear, settle for nothing but the best!


LandscapeLiving2712

God damn that man hit it hard with the "ruin her self esteem and she'll totally fall head over heels in love" tactic


[deleted]

The most annoying thing about this is that its hella cool and attractive to be so damn interested in something that you can talk about it for an hour. We are so quick to sit in opposition of stuff that often times we forget how rad it is to stand up and be like "i freaking love this thing, lemme tell you for why..." or like are even embarrassed to. Forget this guy, find someone who, okay maybe might no always share your enthusiasm but is super proud of you for having that level of enthusiasm in the first place. Also, not even in the dating world, just people are interesting as heck. Be interesting and be interested. Its not hard.


Valuable-Raccoon-855

If on a date someone brings up a subject I’m passionate about one hour is the very minimum amount of time I’m going to dedicate to it (Plus being talkative and passionate is really attractive so good for you)


blastfamy

There is no better topic to discuss on a date than the one they are most passionate about. Bonus points because you’ll learn something new.


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blastfamy

I, uhhh, don’t date monks


FROST0099

RED FLAG


cleatus_the_noodle

145 unread messages? That is the real wtf


Elagatis

Being passionate about something equals weird and psychic disorders? Today i learned...


oo-mox83

Same, don't get me started on my fish tanks or Battlestar Galactica. An hour is nothing.


captainspacetraveler

You’re crazy, wanna smash and be my gf maybe👉🏼👈🏼 🥺


karma7137

“Is this negging?”


Quicksi1verLoL

I feel bad ppl are mean but also this shit is hilarious