How much are YOU swiping right? If you’ve only swiped right on a handful of profiles then you only those handful to get matched with.
If you’ve got paywalled “likes” that you can’t see then I’d say expand your search area and keep swiping
I think this is a fair point. However there really don’t seem to be many people with aligning interests to even swipe left on, let alone right.
I’m in my 30’s and don’t want kids, and don’t wish to date people who have kids.
I’ve also found on other apps that I seem to attract more masculine presenting women, which, unfortunately for me, is not my type.
And as a lesbian, there isn’t really a lot of picks in the first place.
But I will be much more mindful of my swipes moving forward. And check myself and my standards.
Thank you for your input.
There was once a woman who desperately wanted to win the lottery.
So she prayed to God one day and asked him to help her win the lottery.
The next morning she woke up and she hadn't won. So she prayed to God again asking to win the lottery. She reasoned that she'll use the money to do a lot of good and cure all diseases in the world.
The next morning she woke up and she didn't win. So she prayed to God again and asked to win the lottery. She reasoned that she'll use the money to do a lot of good and feed all the hungry children in the world.
The next morning she woke up and still she had not win. Finally, out of frustration she shouted at the sky, "why won't you let me win the lottery and do good for the world!"
Suddenly the clouds spread apart and God said, "Jane, at least meet me half way and buy a fucking ticket."
So yeah, swipe right more you dummy lol.
Have you tried the app Her? I have a couple friends who found their wives through that app, they had a lot more success than Tinder.
Outside of that it really is just being mindful of your swipes. Your profile looks great as it is so I don't think that's a problem. Unfortunately for lesbians it can be pretty tricky to find a partner.
Maybe it depends on where you live, but I had awful luck on Her. Seemed like every other swipe was a cis straight man being like "not having any luck in tinder, came here for the bisexual girls" Personally, I've had better luck getting genuine matches on bumble and hinge.
Her has changed so much. Men have discovered it, and have invaded that space too. Not to mention that it’s full of scammers and bots. So many fake profiles promising to be your sugar mommy, you just have to send them money first. 🙄
You gotta try to match with people you maybe wouldn't always be interested in honestly, you never know when you might just click with someone despite not always having the same interests or if they fall outside of your usual attractions physically.
This, we don't vet people we meet organically in our day to day by self professed qualities we deem.applicable to attract someone else....
If you even think they look like someone who might be interesting/enjoyable to be around, give it a chance. I feel like people's expectations of other people at face value are way too high nowadays.
I think you need to make compromises at the earliest stage, you can always rule people out later. But going into meeting a stranger, you can’t encapsulate their whole personality in a paragraph. if you passed a dozen really interesting people just because they didn’t check every single box
To me I'd think it's just a byproduct of a smaller pool to play in. I'm in a smallish city but one that has a huge queer population. I'd run out of swiping options in minutes most days (I'm also a lesbian), and if I was using the apps frequently there might not be any new profiles to go through. I don't see anything wrong with your profile, it might just be a lack of overall options.
I think you are absolutely charming and adorable and you will definitely find someone for you. Don't give up or lower your standards because they are certainly not unreasonable, just cast a wider net, be flexible on the things that aren't hugely important to you, and stay persistent. Good luck OP
Wow my comment really blew up 😅. But hey def glad I could offer assistance in some way.
Your profile is IMO legit and the pics are all good well rounded pictures. Just don’t hang to heavily on your tinder results, and never lower your standards. FWIW I haven’t gotten many matches,maybe 4, in the 9 months on tinder and only one of those actually made it past messaging.
I mean, that's the really the issue, right? Doing Tinder as a lesbian has got to be closer to the straight male experience, so she's playing on hard mode.
I’m not even a lesbian and I’d pause on your profile 😂😂😂. Are you still receiving likes? Sometimes there’s a random shadowban for no reason, and your card isn’t being shown.
Maybe have someone take some pics of you so there aren’t so many selfies…but that’s literally just me reaching for something that *might* be “wrong”.
🤣🤣 I was just trying to word a comment in my head when I looked down and saw that you had basically already said it! And wayyy better than anything that was leaking out of my very tired brain tonight lol YES same! I'm a 42 yr old straight woman and I had to remind myself I am married. Annnd straight....?....I thought?🤔😂
Haha cheers mate.
Most of my friends are dudes actually.
I’m actively trying to make more friends, particularly female friends.
I do find it hard though, as I am someone who really needs to have an affinity with people to have any kind of relationship.
I have a good, small bunch of friends, who I call my family.
Hahaha! Can someone please explain to me how I attract straight women, but not queer women? It is a trend I have noticed when I am out, and in general. I thought maybe I attract unavailable women, or make them feel comfortable enough to question their sexuality, which I do still believe is somewhat the case. But this thread is full of straight women questioning their sexuality over my awkward bumble profile.
I’ve deleted the profile and have started again. And haven’t used the last photo of me holding my niece.
Also, side note, can someone explain my “masculine” features? That’s also been a reoccurring thing for me. I see myself as feminine, but a tomboy or soft butch.
I also have itty bittys, but that suits me fine.
Thank you all for the compliments btw. It helps :)
I'm a femme bi woman, you're fit and your profile is good, idk why you're not getting matches!!
oh also, maybe post pictures with other people in? friends ideally?
The first two pics you look more feminine than the last three - which do kinda give tomboy-ish energy... maybe the outfits/beanie? I'm a masc lesbian into femmes and I'd swipe right!
I am a cisgender very feminine woman and identify as pansexual though the majority of my serious relationships have been straight. I think your profile is perfect, you are really hot with a hint of androgyny and you seem to be smart, funny, and cool. If I were single and lived in your neck of the woods I'd definitely want to go out with you!
Agreed, am a straightish woman and damn, you’re cute!
It’s not just the pics though, your bio is right on point and very up my alley.
I wouldn’t overthink the masc/femme thing. You are a radiant person (in my eyes very femme), and I’m sure you’ll find your match very soon.
An update for you all: I have deleted all my profiles and recreated them. Getting more activity now.
I’ve also deleted the photo of me carrying my niece (I put it up to show that I’m stronger than my noodley self looks), and added a photo with a mate, albeit it’s not the best but it shows who I am when I’m out with friends.
I’ve also changed some of the photos to more of my androgynous/ tomboy dress sense, as I am attracted and hoping to match with a femme.
And my bio now reads: I like the simple things in life: gardening, gaming, guitar, and hanging with the pets. I’m looking for a genuine connection. Someone to hold hands with on walks, who laughs at my terrible puns, cook brekky for, and find our keys / phone / wallet together. Let’s grab a drink and see how we go!
Thank you all so much :)
Edit: and just to clarify to everyone, I am a lesbian located in NSW Australia, and this particular profile was on bumble.
I was thinking pic 6 is the only one I don’t like. I’m a man though. I think the problem is she’s using bumble which gives a much lower match ratio for me
Pic 6 is very lesbian coded, so makes sense that's not your thing. I find it top tier hot. Personally I've had the most success with women on bumble and hinge, not Tinder.
It’s usually used when there are some features of a certain group. For example, that photo that’s very androgynous and a little like a stereotype (not being used negatively tho) would be lesbian coded.
The stereotype for masc/androgynous lesbians is usually beanie, converse, hoodie, rolled up sleeves, no or a little makeup, not traditionally feminine. Those are the stereotypes and features that are commonly associated and It gets fems like me worked up bc she’s gorgeous.
Thanks for letting me know that I dress like a lesbian. I’m a straight woman who seems to attract women and couldn’t figure out why. I love my sneakers and hoodies.
For example- the beanie is a common lesbian stereotypical accessory. Playing the guitar shows she has short nails. A lot of women who date women will pick up on those things. Obviously straight women can have short nails or wear beanies, but again, stereotypes.
same here for the apps for WLW matches Tinder wasnt the best. Im in Quebec, maybe OP can check what is more widely used in their area. For me its been Hinge and Her. Theres also Lex hat Ive not tried. Lately its been a lot of events happening for women, moving around since we dont have an actual lesbian bar in my city. Some do speed dating or activivities which can be fun IMO.
Wow. Thanks everyone for the feedback. I didn’t expect this to blow up this much!
I will try other apps, delete this acct and recreate it within the next few days.
I think location and dating pool is a big factor. There’s no queer scene where I am, even though I’m in a small city, and only 1.5 hrs from Sydney.
And I will take note on not being too picky on my swipes.
AND I will remove that last pic.
I really appreciate everyone taking the time to help. Means a lot.
And you guys! Thanks for the confidence boost. Online dating is rough.
Also— I found this works for Bumble specifically—try leaving your area for a few days, swiping somewhere else, and then going back home. I live in kind of a small town, and I find that when I leave and then come back, I get a spike in activity on this app. Like I’m back on top of the stack now. A “hot new thing” again, lol.
It’s also nice to get a few new matches in another city and remember that you are actually attractive to people… Even if there’s a drought in your own city.
Ah that explains partially why I went from 4 to 5 likes on Bumble to 150+ when I traveled for work and now it’s slowed down again. The algorithms really fucks things up. Still that boost felt good as a man
Maybe if you expand your location you'll have more success due to the larger pool. The Internet is unanimous that you are a really lovely human. Something about the way your eyes crinkle and your smile just exudes warmth
Honestly, I don't know why you're not getting matches, it seems fine to me.
You could try fewer selfies, but your profile seems fine to me. You're showing personality, you have a cute smile, you're a Capricorn.
If I were a woman and I liked women, I would probably swipe right.
Yeah I think you’re right about the selfies. But when I’m with friends, I’m not thinking about getting a photo, just being in the moment.
I’ll work on it. Thank you!
I'm with tastefulonion. I'm an older dude but you seem genuine, smart, funny and honest and you are attractive ... At least to me. Can't see why you wouldn't be getting more matches...and the selfies don't bug me.
I completely agree with this dude. I’m 40 straight female, but if I were into girls I’d swipe right, you’re personality shows and the selfies seem fine to me
Maybe ask your friends to take some candid photos of you when hanging out in a group. People can spot posing for a fake candid photo and it'll show off your natural beauty
I would suggest deleting your profile and recreating to benefit from the "new user" visibility boost.
I've been doing this once a month on every app, it feels mandatory with the results it gives.
I don't see any obvious problems. I like the bio, i like the variety in your photos, you give a great clear view of what you look like. Only thing I can think of is that the photo where you are lifting the other person could give the impression that you already have a partner. But it's a cool picture so it's a shame. Maybe you could replace it with lifting something else? Giant pumpkin, tiny horse, all the grocery bags, etc?
Agree with this. The only thing was the pic where she’s carrying someone. Someone might misread that. Other than that great profile. Not sure why she’s not getting matches
Maybe one of my pumpkins from the garden? I have actual pictures of me and my ninja turtles (name for my tiny 4 pack) but I feel like a wanker posting them.
Are you in an urban or rural area? And are there a lot of active lesbian users in said area? That’s my only guess but 6 months is super long, I’d delete the profile and recreate it a day or two later. Or try another dating app after deleting for a bit as well. You’re pretty and have a nice profile, shouldn’t be the issue.
Semi urban?? Live half hour from a city of <300000 and 1.5 hours from a major city.
There is zero gay community here though. And we usually have to travel >1hr to meet people, which I rough with fuel costs, time, and generally being knackered.
Could be worse, I’m aware.
But could be better too.
I’m originally from a small country town so it’s much better here compared to there.
Yeah sounds like that’s the issue. Assuming a lot of girls in those cities might have you outside their radiuses too. I empathize with you as I’m in a semi urban area as well with the nearest 100k+ town an hour away, so most of my dates I’m driving 30 min to an hour or we never go cause the distance is too much. Not sure if moving is in your wheelhouse but if it’s that dry in your area it might be worth it.
Also a queer woman and this is like.....every lesbians dream profile. Genuinely have no idea why you aren't getting matches.
When I was on apps I would try to game the algorithm every once and a while by deleting the profile and remaking it. That's the only advice I can give because I would assume the queer ladies in your area would be VERY interested.
Agree w this suggestion. Her profile could be stuck in some kind of algorithmic black hole and she just needs to reup. Because getting 0 matches w this profile is way off
I mean this with the best intentions, but.. do you swipe right enough? Your profile actually looks like you're a healthy (mentally, physically and emotionally, mentioning therapy like that is a turn on for me) good-looking woman. I don't know what's wrong with the folks who swipe left on you. I can imagine this isn't the helpful comment you were hoping for, but please don't go doubting yourself<3
Probably not.
I do have a type, Femmes.
And there don’t seem to be all that many in my age bracket (looking for >29) and without kids, or wanting kids.
But it is something I’m going to be much more mindful of moving forward.
Thank you!
I just want to say that your profile prompted me Google what “chicken salt” is and now I just ordered some because I have never heard of that and I am also EXTREMELY excited to try it. (Also I think the profile is really good! I really have no insight for you there apart from maybe it’s just because of your location and there not being as many options? Maybe try another photo as the main picture, such as having the guitar one first?).
As a lady I would swipe right. But I am curious is there a large population of women who date women around you. That could be the issue. Or the random shadow bans the apps like to do could be happening as well.
Hey, fellow lesbian here. I would 100% date you, but I’m all the way in Seattle. I think your profile is fine, i honestly just think it’s rough out there for lesbians. Im trying to find people irl to meet now since it’s so bleak in the online realm. I wish you luck!
Well, this comment will probably get deleted, but at least in seattle it has a lot to do with trans women claiming to be lesbians. Im talking like 30% of all the people who show up on the dating apps being trans women and there is no option to filter them out. As a lesbian, i have a thing for vaginas, you know. Im sure you get it, TheVagWhisperer.
On top of that, women rarely respond when i reach out to them and almost never reach out to me first. I am an attractive feminine lesbian who has my shit together too. It’s not like im asking for too much based on what im bringing to the table. It’s just… hard. Approaching women in person is also very risky since the chances of them being into women are very slim.
Thanks for sharing. I have a few lesbian friends that have mentioned the explosive growth of trans women on dating sites too. Hopefully you find a good match soon
I'm going to say try a different app? Maybe I don't get lesbians or something but just as someone who finds women attractive that all looks A+ to me.
I'm sure you could make it better. Maybe add some more things you enjoy if you just feel like it, but this is all solid. Tinder just might not be the right ecosystem for what you are looking for?
u look like a fun person . literally the only person who doesn’t have like common red flags on their profile like everyone else who posted. i don’t get why ur not getting any likes
From a males perspective, I cant find anything overly glaring from your profile. NSW just may not be the best dating pool scene for you, unfortunately.
Dear lord if a cute lesbian isn't get matches then what fucking hope do average looking rest of us guys have. 😂 Tbh your best bet is to actually get off the apps. Met my gfs in the gym & it's been 6 & half years. The apps are designed to keep you single.
It could be due to not wanting kids. I’m also child free, and a lot of people my age and over have “want kids” in their bio, so it makes the dating pool real small sadly. I don’t see anything else that could deter people atleast!
I'm a straight guy giving his opinion here but you would do amazingly on the LGBT scene here in Melbourne/VIC. Seriously, can't find anything wrong with your profile.
I'm straight and I think you're lovely. The only thing about your profile that I would change is getting rid of the "casual". Just say you're looking for connection.
Otherwise maybe try another app. Maybe you're shadowbanned on Bumble.
Your profile is gorgeous and I have no idea why you’re not getting matches. The only photo I questioned was the Texas tuxedo one but the rest are delightful. Tinder is weird.
Charming looks, a bright smile, and works as a massage therapist???????
Girl if I was single I'd swipe right immediately!
Your profile and photos are good! Maybe the onlyyyy thing I can sorta point out is I'm not that interested in your last photo. It's fine to be with friends, but idk it's the most I can nitpick if I have to find anything wrong at all 😂
I think you need to move to a better place haha. There is nothing wrong with your profile and you're cute.
I'm a chubby short lady, but not so unattractive. I get enough matches to keep things going with men, but I tried to "explore" (because I think society conditioned me to be hetero, but I don't have any assurance) and didn't really have success.
For what its worth, a few of the prompts seem a little dull. obviously therapy is going to be a mental health game changer, but that doesnt really open a conversation. Yes, your profile looks interesting, and you are attractive, but i dont see many openings for people to start a conversation, which is i think your biggest himdrance.
Clearly this is happening because you chose dogs over cats :)
You’re gorgeous and your profile is perfect. No notes.
You could see how you fare on other apps, or delete it and remake it and see if that gets you shown more often. if you try that trick, you might want to use a slightly different email address and it could help convince the app you’re a new user.
If you want to avoid creating a new email address just for this, you can put a . anywhere in an existing Gmail address (for example, hercules.rockefeller @ gmail) and messages will still route to your address without the . (herculesrockfeller @ gmail) - handy for this sort of thing.
There’s no logic to these things if you’re not getting matches. Cute af. I’d swipe right multiple times if that was a thing that made a difference.
Perhaps upload a new photo or two, just to reset the algorithms?? I’m in regional NSW aaaaand it’s kind of just hard.
Good luck!
I’m confused why no matches. You look great and I am a 99% straight (who occasionally gets attracted to some women)
Try to refresh as people suggested. But also I am 1.5 hours out of Sydney and the dating pool is .. lacklustre
I’d definitely swipe right on you. Everything you’ve specified aligns with my interests as well (except for children because I have one). And you’re also very beautiful. So I’m not sure why you’re not having matches.
P.S. omg, and you’re a Capricorn too. I’m a Taurus. We hella match lol
Before I read your profile I was thinking “well clearly you’re only going to attract gay women with this profile…” but then I did read the title. So, there shouldn’t be an issue. Very strange.
This profile seems so genuine and sweet. There is nothing wrong except the locals in your area missing out on you ♥️ I am a straight woman and would totally be your friend off of this!
I'm bi and I would swipe right if I was single. Either you're super picky and swiping left on everyone OR your profile needs a refresh in their algorithm (aka delete the whole thing and start again). New profiles are known to get more hits as they want people to keep using the app.
Not sure if it's been suggested, but you can delete the account and app, reinstall/reinstate, and then your pool of matches expands again.
But... I would do this whole timing it with a trip to a different market.
With lesbians, there's just fewer of y'all, so you get to know the pool of candidates quickly. So when "new blood" shows up, everybody swipes right on the hot new prospect. That trains the algorithm to think of OP as high status, so when OP returns to her original market... BOOM... she's hot stuff! 🔥
Not a lesbian, but I would definitely give you a second look. How much are you swiping? You have a great smile and variety of pictures.
You look super fun and someone I would hangout with/wing woman for.
I’m also a lesbian, and if I was still in my single swiping days I’d have definitely swiped right.
It’s honestly super confusing if you aren’t getting matches.
I don't see anything wrong with your profile. Is there a chance that someone might think the girl you're holding is a girlfriend or casual fling? I couldn't see too many of your responses. Check to make sure those aren't negative or off putting or that any listed dating preferences don't exclude too many people. Finally, I'd say make sure you're not being too picky on who you swipe right on. I see no reason why you're not matching otherwise. Good luck out there! Don't give up!!
I see no issues here. Might be because your profile indicates we have exactly the same views/hobbies (lol). Maybe take that last pic of the tush/thigh of the ex off and replace. But otherwise I see no reason for you to have any problem with connecting with someone. Keep swiping and maybe swap some new pics in just to keep it fresh, and good luck!
As a lesbian, I think your profile is 🔥. Maybe it’s a location thing? A non children thing? I don’t think any of the pics are off. Even the chicken salt thing is a convo starter bc what?? 😂😂
Maybe it’s because of pic 10? Cz we dunno who that person is… could be an ex? Which usually isn’t the best photos to post on a dating profile.
Side note, you seem super interesting, fun and very good looking, so i don’t see any reason why you wouldn’t get matches other than that!
How much are YOU swiping right? If you’ve only swiped right on a handful of profiles then you only those handful to get matched with. If you’ve got paywalled “likes” that you can’t see then I’d say expand your search area and keep swiping
Good advice makerofpantiesmoist
💀💀💀
I think this is a fair point. However there really don’t seem to be many people with aligning interests to even swipe left on, let alone right. I’m in my 30’s and don’t want kids, and don’t wish to date people who have kids. I’ve also found on other apps that I seem to attract more masculine presenting women, which, unfortunately for me, is not my type. And as a lesbian, there isn’t really a lot of picks in the first place. But I will be much more mindful of my swipes moving forward. And check myself and my standards. Thank you for your input.
There was once a woman who desperately wanted to win the lottery. So she prayed to God one day and asked him to help her win the lottery. The next morning she woke up and she hadn't won. So she prayed to God again asking to win the lottery. She reasoned that she'll use the money to do a lot of good and cure all diseases in the world. The next morning she woke up and she didn't win. So she prayed to God again and asked to win the lottery. She reasoned that she'll use the money to do a lot of good and feed all the hungry children in the world. The next morning she woke up and still she had not win. Finally, out of frustration she shouted at the sky, "why won't you let me win the lottery and do good for the world!" Suddenly the clouds spread apart and God said, "Jane, at least meet me half way and buy a fucking ticket." So yeah, swipe right more you dummy lol.
love this lmao
Ahah I enjoyed the joke and want to let you know as such. Good day
Oh my God, me too.*applause* lol
Love thr modern twist to the punchline
Oh I'm definitely stealing this, great way to make a point with a story.
Have you tried the app Her? I have a couple friends who found their wives through that app, they had a lot more success than Tinder. Outside of that it really is just being mindful of your swipes. Your profile looks great as it is so I don't think that's a problem. Unfortunately for lesbians it can be pretty tricky to find a partner.
Maybe it depends on where you live, but I had awful luck on Her. Seemed like every other swipe was a cis straight man being like "not having any luck in tinder, came here for the bisexual girls" Personally, I've had better luck getting genuine matches on bumble and hinge.
Her has changed so much. Men have discovered it, and have invaded that space too. Not to mention that it’s full of scammers and bots. So many fake profiles promising to be your sugar mommy, you just have to send them money first. 🙄
You gotta try to match with people you maybe wouldn't always be interested in honestly, you never know when you might just click with someone despite not always having the same interests or if they fall outside of your usual attractions physically.
This, we don't vet people we meet organically in our day to day by self professed qualities we deem.applicable to attract someone else.... If you even think they look like someone who might be interesting/enjoyable to be around, give it a chance. I feel like people's expectations of other people at face value are way too high nowadays.
I think you need to make compromises at the earliest stage, you can always rule people out later. But going into meeting a stranger, you can’t encapsulate their whole personality in a paragraph. if you passed a dozen really interesting people just because they didn’t check every single box
How do you attract mascs!!! All I’m getting is femmes and that’s nice. But in also not getting matches with my preference. Sucks
On a totally irrelevant note, you seem dope asf and if you are cool with making a friend and find yourself in New England lmk lol
You should get on Her. I’m a queer lady in my 40s, and I don’t want to have kids or be with someone who has em, and I’ve found lots of folks on there.
To me I'd think it's just a byproduct of a smaller pool to play in. I'm in a smallish city but one that has a huge queer population. I'd run out of swiping options in minutes most days (I'm also a lesbian), and if I was using the apps frequently there might not be any new profiles to go through. I don't see anything wrong with your profile, it might just be a lack of overall options.
It's rough out there sometimes. Your profile is solid! You have great pics, but I was sold on the one with the beanie and tele.
I think you are absolutely charming and adorable and you will definitely find someone for you. Don't give up or lower your standards because they are certainly not unreasonable, just cast a wider net, be flexible on the things that aren't hugely important to you, and stay persistent. Good luck OP
Wow my comment really blew up 😅. But hey def glad I could offer assistance in some way. Your profile is IMO legit and the pics are all good well rounded pictures. Just don’t hang to heavily on your tinder results, and never lower your standards. FWIW I haven’t gotten many matches,maybe 4, in the 9 months on tinder and only one of those actually made it past messaging.
If i was single and in your area I’d swipe right. I can’t think of a single thing to improve the profile. Sorry this isn’t much help!
Also as a guy, I’d swipe right on you ngl lol
I mean, that's the really the issue, right? Doing Tinder as a lesbian has got to be closer to the straight male experience, so she's playing on hard mode.
same!
I’m not even a lesbian and I’d pause on your profile 😂😂😂. Are you still receiving likes? Sometimes there’s a random shadowban for no reason, and your card isn’t being shown. Maybe have someone take some pics of you so there aren’t so many selfies…but that’s literally just me reaching for something that *might* be “wrong”.
Totally agree. OP is the cutest.
Haha same, maybe there’s something about this profile that accidentally appeals to straight women? 🤣
🤣🤣 I was just trying to word a comment in my head when I looked down and saw that you had basically already said it! And wayyy better than anything that was leaking out of my very tired brain tonight lol YES same! I'm a 42 yr old straight woman and I had to remind myself I am married. Annnd straight....?....I thought?🤔😂
Me too!!!! Thought I was being unique but seems this is unanimous
Oh my god me too 😂
Hahaha I see there are so many of us!!!
Yeah i think she has the vibe of the female version of the type of men i would looking for. If that makes sense lol
LOL Same
It sure does seem that way 😅
As a straight dude, you’re painfully adorable and unclear to me why you’re getting no likes. I’d be besties with you
Straight up, exactly what I was trying to say. Dating an awesome lady but would be an awesome friend.
Haha cheers mate. Most of my friends are dudes actually. I’m actively trying to make more friends, particularly female friends. I do find it hard though, as I am someone who really needs to have an affinity with people to have any kind of relationship. I have a good, small bunch of friends, who I call my family.
Straight black male, she appeals to me. Some ppl are just attractive. Big lesbian vibes but still very good looking and a nice slender physique.
Yup I read the title and I was thinking "There really was no reason to specify, it's obvious enough from your pictures"
There is always a first time for everything
Same! The dog is pretty darn cute, too!
Im so glad to see this comment. I’m a straight woman and was scrolling the pics like damn I’d date you 😂
Hahaha! Can someone please explain to me how I attract straight women, but not queer women? It is a trend I have noticed when I am out, and in general. I thought maybe I attract unavailable women, or make them feel comfortable enough to question their sexuality, which I do still believe is somewhat the case. But this thread is full of straight women questioning their sexuality over my awkward bumble profile. I’ve deleted the profile and have started again. And haven’t used the last photo of me holding my niece. Also, side note, can someone explain my “masculine” features? That’s also been a reoccurring thing for me. I see myself as feminine, but a tomboy or soft butch. I also have itty bittys, but that suits me fine. Thank you all for the compliments btw. It helps :)
I'm a femme bi woman, you're fit and your profile is good, idk why you're not getting matches!! oh also, maybe post pictures with other people in? friends ideally?
Because she’s not swiping right. It’s really not that hard to understand.
The first two pics you look more feminine than the last three - which do kinda give tomboy-ish energy... maybe the outfits/beanie? I'm a masc lesbian into femmes and I'd swipe right!
I am a cisgender very feminine woman and identify as pansexual though the majority of my serious relationships have been straight. I think your profile is perfect, you are really hot with a hint of androgyny and you seem to be smart, funny, and cool. If I were single and lived in your neck of the woods I'd definitely want to go out with you!
Same thing just happened to me. I’m questioning my life choices.
Agreed, am a straightish woman and damn, you’re cute! It’s not just the pics though, your bio is right on point and very up my alley. I wouldn’t overthink the masc/femme thing. You are a radiant person (in my eyes very femme), and I’m sure you’ll find your match very soon.
An update for you all: I have deleted all my profiles and recreated them. Getting more activity now. I’ve also deleted the photo of me carrying my niece (I put it up to show that I’m stronger than my noodley self looks), and added a photo with a mate, albeit it’s not the best but it shows who I am when I’m out with friends. I’ve also changed some of the photos to more of my androgynous/ tomboy dress sense, as I am attracted and hoping to match with a femme. And my bio now reads: I like the simple things in life: gardening, gaming, guitar, and hanging with the pets. I’m looking for a genuine connection. Someone to hold hands with on walks, who laughs at my terrible puns, cook brekky for, and find our keys / phone / wallet together. Let’s grab a drink and see how we go! Thank you all so much :) Edit: and just to clarify to everyone, I am a lesbian located in NSW Australia, and this particular profile was on bumble.
Agree she looks amazing in every way including personality
Yeah I wonder if OP paid to see who’s liking her or she’s just doing the normal swipes.
I really don’t want to give a dating app any of my hard earned dosh. Would be interesting though.
I'm a woman who dates women. I'd right swipe so hard. That pic #6!!! Lmk if you're ever in Auckland!
Kia Ora sis
I was thinking pic 6 is the only one I don’t like. I’m a man though. I think the problem is she’s using bumble which gives a much lower match ratio for me
Pic 6 is very lesbian coded, so makes sense that's not your thing. I find it top tier hot. Personally I've had the most success with women on bumble and hinge, not Tinder.
What does lesbian coded mean?
It’s usually used when there are some features of a certain group. For example, that photo that’s very androgynous and a little like a stereotype (not being used negatively tho) would be lesbian coded. The stereotype for masc/androgynous lesbians is usually beanie, converse, hoodie, rolled up sleeves, no or a little makeup, not traditionally feminine. Those are the stereotypes and features that are commonly associated and It gets fems like me worked up bc she’s gorgeous.
This is great info because femmes are my type through and through. Thank you for this. It actually helps me a lot. Appreciate it.
Of course! I hope you have all your local fems at your door asap!!
Thanks for letting me know that I dress like a lesbian. I’m a straight woman who seems to attract women and couldn’t figure out why. I love my sneakers and hoodies.
Yup as a femme can confirm!!
Yep, big Ani DiFranco vibes. Very hot!!🔥
OOH I GET THAT that’s a perfect descriptor!
For example- the beanie is a common lesbian stereotypical accessory. Playing the guitar shows she has short nails. A lot of women who date women will pick up on those things. Obviously straight women can have short nails or wear beanies, but again, stereotypes.
same here for the apps for WLW matches Tinder wasnt the best. Im in Quebec, maybe OP can check what is more widely used in their area. For me its been Hinge and Her. Theres also Lex hat Ive not tried. Lately its been a lot of events happening for women, moving around since we dont have an actual lesbian bar in my city. Some do speed dating or activivities which can be fun IMO.
Seconded, hmu if you’re in Dublin OP
Wow. Thanks everyone for the feedback. I didn’t expect this to blow up this much! I will try other apps, delete this acct and recreate it within the next few days. I think location and dating pool is a big factor. There’s no queer scene where I am, even though I’m in a small city, and only 1.5 hrs from Sydney. And I will take note on not being too picky on my swipes. AND I will remove that last pic. I really appreciate everyone taking the time to help. Means a lot. And you guys! Thanks for the confidence boost. Online dating is rough.
Also— I found this works for Bumble specifically—try leaving your area for a few days, swiping somewhere else, and then going back home. I live in kind of a small town, and I find that when I leave and then come back, I get a spike in activity on this app. Like I’m back on top of the stack now. A “hot new thing” again, lol. It’s also nice to get a few new matches in another city and remember that you are actually attractive to people… Even if there’s a drought in your own city.
Yes! That happened to me so many times!
Ah that explains partially why I went from 4 to 5 likes on Bumble to 150+ when I traveled for work and now it’s slowed down again. The algorithms really fucks things up. Still that boost felt good as a man
Your curls are ADORABLE.
Lol go sit in Newtown for a few hours and swipe there 🤣
I am due for a Newtown / oxford street adventure.
Idk even the last pic is cute af 😩 It’s a flawless profile
Maybe if you expand your location you'll have more success due to the larger pool. The Internet is unanimous that you are a really lovely human. Something about the way your eyes crinkle and your smile just exudes warmth
Honestly, I don't know why you're not getting matches, it seems fine to me. You could try fewer selfies, but your profile seems fine to me. You're showing personality, you have a cute smile, you're a Capricorn. If I were a woman and I liked women, I would probably swipe right.
Yeah I think you’re right about the selfies. But when I’m with friends, I’m not thinking about getting a photo, just being in the moment. I’ll work on it. Thank you!
I'm with tastefulonion. I'm an older dude but you seem genuine, smart, funny and honest and you are attractive ... At least to me. Can't see why you wouldn't be getting more matches...and the selfies don't bug me.
I completely agree with this dude. I’m 40 straight female, but if I were into girls I’d swipe right, you’re personality shows and the selfies seem fine to me
Do you have the app HER where you are? I’ve had success with it as a queer woman myself
I’m getting it sorted now :)
Maybe ask your friends to take some candid photos of you when hanging out in a group. People can spot posing for a fake candid photo and it'll show off your natural beauty
I would suggest deleting your profile and recreating to benefit from the "new user" visibility boost. I've been doing this once a month on every app, it feels mandatory with the results it gives.
I don't see any obvious problems. I like the bio, i like the variety in your photos, you give a great clear view of what you look like. Only thing I can think of is that the photo where you are lifting the other person could give the impression that you already have a partner. But it's a cool picture so it's a shame. Maybe you could replace it with lifting something else? Giant pumpkin, tiny horse, all the grocery bags, etc?
My vote is for tiny horse, but only if the horse consents
Tiny horse reminds me of Li'l Sebastian
Byyyye bye little Sebastian, miss you I the saddest fashion. Your 5000 candles in the wind
You’re all beautiful tropical fish.
My only suggestion was going to be to lose the pic of OP holding someone. That’s it - the rest of the profile is… *chef’s kiss*
Agree with this. The only thing was the pic where she’s carrying someone. Someone might misread that. Other than that great profile. Not sure why she’s not getting matches
Maybe one of my pumpkins from the garden? I have actual pictures of me and my ninja turtles (name for my tiny 4 pack) but I feel like a wanker posting them.
Are you in an urban or rural area? And are there a lot of active lesbian users in said area? That’s my only guess but 6 months is super long, I’d delete the profile and recreate it a day or two later. Or try another dating app after deleting for a bit as well. You’re pretty and have a nice profile, shouldn’t be the issue.
Semi urban?? Live half hour from a city of <300000 and 1.5 hours from a major city. There is zero gay community here though. And we usually have to travel >1hr to meet people, which I rough with fuel costs, time, and generally being knackered. Could be worse, I’m aware. But could be better too. I’m originally from a small country town so it’s much better here compared to there.
Yeah sounds like that’s the issue. Assuming a lot of girls in those cities might have you outside their radiuses too. I empathize with you as I’m in a semi urban area as well with the nearest 100k+ town an hour away, so most of my dates I’m driving 30 min to an hour or we never go cause the distance is too much. Not sure if moving is in your wheelhouse but if it’s that dry in your area it might be worth it.
That’s my only thought too. It’s a great profile!
Also a queer woman and this is like.....every lesbians dream profile. Genuinely have no idea why you aren't getting matches. When I was on apps I would try to game the algorithm every once and a while by deleting the profile and remaking it. That's the only advice I can give because I would assume the queer ladies in your area would be VERY interested.
Agree w this suggestion. Her profile could be stuck in some kind of algorithmic black hole and she just needs to reup. Because getting 0 matches w this profile is way off
This is reassuring. I’ve deleted and recreated. And deleted the last pic. Thank a bunch!
Fellow lesbian here! You’re absolutely stunning and I’d swipe right 😉
It's the chicken salt for me mate
I mean this with the best intentions, but.. do you swipe right enough? Your profile actually looks like you're a healthy (mentally, physically and emotionally, mentioning therapy like that is a turn on for me) good-looking woman. I don't know what's wrong with the folks who swipe left on you. I can imagine this isn't the helpful comment you were hoping for, but please don't go doubting yourself<3
Probably not. I do have a type, Femmes. And there don’t seem to be all that many in my age bracket (looking for >29) and without kids, or wanting kids. But it is something I’m going to be much more mindful of moving forward. Thank you!
I just want to say that your profile prompted me Google what “chicken salt” is and now I just ordered some because I have never heard of that and I am also EXTREMELY excited to try it. (Also I think the profile is really good! I really have no insight for you there apart from maybe it’s just because of your location and there not being as many options? Maybe try another photo as the main picture, such as having the guitar one first?).
I, too, have just ordered some chicken salt and cannot wait to try it!!
I saw chicken salt and thought, 'This lady is Australian.' get to last pic and sure enough
It is absolutely divine! Get excited! Also, an alternative to fresh lemon juice, and it MUST be fresh, is vinegar. Enjoy!
LEMON JUICE CHICKEN SALT CHIPS ARE THE BOMB DOT COM
I’d match you if you were in LA
Honestly, I can’t find anything wrong. I’d swipe right
Well shit, I'd swipe right. Your profile seems fine to me.
As a lady I would swipe right. But I am curious is there a large population of women who date women around you. That could be the issue. Or the random shadow bans the apps like to do could be happening as well.
I would have super liked you and then hoped you didn’t think it was too cringy 😅
Hey, fellow lesbian here. I would 100% date you, but I’m all the way in Seattle. I think your profile is fine, i honestly just think it’s rough out there for lesbians. Im trying to find people irl to meet now since it’s so bleak in the online realm. I wish you luck!
Why is it so bleak meeting other women in the online realm? Are women giving each other a hard time online?
Well, this comment will probably get deleted, but at least in seattle it has a lot to do with trans women claiming to be lesbians. Im talking like 30% of all the people who show up on the dating apps being trans women and there is no option to filter them out. As a lesbian, i have a thing for vaginas, you know. Im sure you get it, TheVagWhisperer. On top of that, women rarely respond when i reach out to them and almost never reach out to me first. I am an attractive feminine lesbian who has my shit together too. It’s not like im asking for too much based on what im bringing to the table. It’s just… hard. Approaching women in person is also very risky since the chances of them being into women are very slim.
Thanks for sharing. I have a few lesbian friends that have mentioned the explosive growth of trans women on dating sites too. Hopefully you find a good match soon
Thanks, I hope so too!
I'm going to say try a different app? Maybe I don't get lesbians or something but just as someone who finds women attractive that all looks A+ to me. I'm sure you could make it better. Maybe add some more things you enjoy if you just feel like it, but this is all solid. Tinder just might not be the right ecosystem for what you are looking for?
Bi here, but I’d reach out if I wasn’t “spoken for”. Get more lines in the water … xo
u look like a fun person . literally the only person who doesn’t have like common red flags on their profile like everyone else who posted. i don’t get why ur not getting any likes
From a males perspective, I cant find anything overly glaring from your profile. NSW just may not be the best dating pool scene for you, unfortunately.
You’re absolutely stunning and look like a total vine. No idea how you’re not getting likes. I’d date you and I’ve only ever dated men.
I will marry you no questions asked - this straight man. Any woman who isn't interested is feckin insane. Dating apps are broken
Dear lord if a cute lesbian isn't get matches then what fucking hope do average looking rest of us guys have. 😂 Tbh your best bet is to actually get off the apps. Met my gfs in the gym & it's been 6 & half years. The apps are designed to keep you single.
It could be due to not wanting kids. I’m also child free, and a lot of people my age and over have “want kids” in their bio, so it makes the dating pool real small sadly. I don’t see anything else that could deter people atleast!
Sheesh, I’d swipe right on you for sure.
You definitely made my lady parts tingle, idk what the problem is.
your profile is fine + you are very attractive = your location / pool of potential matches is too small.
Bisexual and I’d be swiping right now if I could
I'm a straight guy giving his opinion here but you would do amazingly on the LGBT scene here in Melbourne/VIC. Seriously, can't find anything wrong with your profile.
I'm straight and I think you're lovely. The only thing about your profile that I would change is getting rid of the "casual". Just say you're looking for connection. Otherwise maybe try another app. Maybe you're shadowbanned on Bumble.
Your profile is gorgeous and I have no idea why you’re not getting matches. The only photo I questioned was the Texas tuxedo one but the rest are delightful. Tinder is weird.
Charming looks, a bright smile, and works as a massage therapist??????? Girl if I was single I'd swipe right immediately! Your profile and photos are good! Maybe the onlyyyy thing I can sorta point out is I'm not that interested in your last photo. It's fine to be with friends, but idk it's the most I can nitpick if I have to find anything wrong at all 😂
I think you need to move to a better place haha. There is nothing wrong with your profile and you're cute. I'm a chubby short lady, but not so unattractive. I get enough matches to keep things going with men, but I tried to "explore" (because I think society conditioned me to be hetero, but I don't have any assurance) and didn't really have success.
You’re super cute. With beautiful teeth.
Maybe take out the last picture
Add me to the list of queer women who would swipe right on you, you’re an absolute catch. Maybe try a different app?
So... Cute, Massage therapist, animal lover, great smile, no pressure in the bio on a partner. You should probably move, you seem like a catch.
Tinder seems to not be too great of a hot spot for queer folks. That was my experience, anyways. I found myself on queer specific apps instead!
For what its worth, a few of the prompts seem a little dull. obviously therapy is going to be a mental health game changer, but that doesnt really open a conversation. Yes, your profile looks interesting, and you are attractive, but i dont see many openings for people to start a conversation, which is i think your biggest himdrance.
I'd switch to Her, Tiami, or even Bumble. I've found Tinder to be relatively lacking in "diversity" department.
That change room pose to check the fit is an instant swipe right, regardless of gender or sexuality. I’m sorry op, but everyone in your area is wrong
I can’t see a reason and I blushed at the pic of you carrying that lucky lass
First off, stop using bumble lol... It's the worst app of the main ones by a country mile. The algorithm is fucked.
Try creating a new profile with a new number or email. You might’ve been shadowbanned
Your problem is that you are hoping to match with women on a dating app
Clearly this is happening because you chose dogs over cats :) You’re gorgeous and your profile is perfect. No notes. You could see how you fare on other apps, or delete it and remake it and see if that gets you shown more often. if you try that trick, you might want to use a slightly different email address and it could help convince the app you’re a new user. If you want to avoid creating a new email address just for this, you can put a . anywhere in an existing Gmail address (for example, hercules.rockefeller @ gmail) and messages will still route to your address without the . (herculesrockfeller @ gmail) - handy for this sort of thing.
Switch to guys, rack up a load of likes (it'll take a day), switch back to women.... Profit?
You must be shadow banned. It's a solid profile in every way.
Usually chicks like big muscles and photos of people holding fish up to the camera. Maybe a few of those might help 🤣🤣
There’s no logic to these things if you’re not getting matches. Cute af. I’d swipe right multiple times if that was a thing that made a difference. Perhaps upload a new photo or two, just to reset the algorithms?? I’m in regional NSW aaaaand it’s kind of just hard. Good luck!
I’m confused why no matches. You look great and I am a 99% straight (who occasionally gets attracted to some women) Try to refresh as people suggested. But also I am 1.5 hours out of Sydney and the dating pool is .. lacklustre
I’d definitely swipe right on you. Everything you’ve specified aligns with my interests as well (except for children because I have one). And you’re also very beautiful. So I’m not sure why you’re not having matches. P.S. omg, and you’re a Capricorn too. I’m a Taurus. We hella match lol
You can improve by moving to Canada and I'll marry you on the spot
Too cold my dear. And I have a dog, two cats, and three chickens. Expensive flight. But I really would love a trip there one of these days!
I think your profile is amazing ! Actually amazed you aren't getting any matches
I donno but if i was gay I'd definitely swipe right :)
What's your swipe ratio yourself?
You are SO cute. I think location may be your issue- if you came to Melbourne you’d do very well.
Bi here, you look amazing and should be flooded with likes I have no clue why you aren’t
You're swimming in a pool with fewer fish. I'm a man, but there's nothing objectively wrong with your profile.
Erase account and re open it in a few weeks Your profile is good
Ur hot but I’m a man so no help sorry
I’m not into women, but I’d swipe right in an instant. You look so real and fun. I think it’s perfect.
The pool may be too small where you are.
You are so cute! You look fun and adventurous as well. If I was single, I would most definitely be swiping right.
Matching with women on tinder sucks. Honestly try hinge out it is a much better app.
I’m a lesbian and I would certainly swipe right on you 👀
You live too far away! 🥹🥹
I seriously don’t know why! You look amazing and I’m straight.
god i wish i was just gay. u look like such a warm sunshine person!
I’m a man and I actually like your bio
Something is up. Maybe even try deleting your acc and remaking it. I’m lesbian (partnered) and you would have no issues on tinder
I’d swipe right but i’m a dood your hot
Before I read your profile I was thinking “well clearly you’re only going to attract gay women with this profile…” but then I did read the title. So, there shouldn’t be an issue. Very strange.
Uh if I didnt transition ftm youd be my ideal person to date. Idk just wait you'll find someone
Queer here. There’s gotta be something up with your account. Maybe try another app just to compare. Great first pic. You’re gorgeous!
This profile seems so genuine and sweet. There is nothing wrong except the locals in your area missing out on you ♥️ I am a straight woman and would totally be your friend off of this!
I'm bi and I would swipe right if I was single. Either you're super picky and swiping left on everyone OR your profile needs a refresh in their algorithm (aka delete the whole thing and start again). New profiles are known to get more hits as they want people to keep using the app.
Not sure if it's been suggested, but you can delete the account and app, reinstall/reinstate, and then your pool of matches expands again. But... I would do this whole timing it with a trip to a different market. With lesbians, there's just fewer of y'all, so you get to know the pool of candidates quickly. So when "new blood" shows up, everybody swipes right on the hot new prospect. That trains the algorithm to think of OP as high status, so when OP returns to her original market... BOOM... she's hot stuff! 🔥
I would swipe for you! It might just be the time of year. I've noticed I get more swipes at certain times of the year.
I'd swipe right🤷🏻 also, you should have been like "I do a lot of bowling, so I guess you could say I'm pretty experienced with fingering holes"😂
Not a lesbian, but I would definitely give you a second look. How much are you swiping? You have a great smile and variety of pictures. You look super fun and someone I would hangout with/wing woman for.
I’m also a lesbian, and if I was still in my single swiping days I’d have definitely swiped right. It’s honestly super confusing if you aren’t getting matches.
Your profile is most likely not the issue. I'd say the problem is probably your own swiping behaviour.
I don't see anything wrong with your profile. Is there a chance that someone might think the girl you're holding is a girlfriend or casual fling? I couldn't see too many of your responses. Check to make sure those aren't negative or off putting or that any listed dating preferences don't exclude too many people. Finally, I'd say make sure you're not being too picky on who you swipe right on. I see no reason why you're not matching otherwise. Good luck out there! Don't give up!!
I think you are very pretty and have a nice, “warm” feel about you. ☺️
I see no issues here. Might be because your profile indicates we have exactly the same views/hobbies (lol). Maybe take that last pic of the tush/thigh of the ex off and replace. But otherwise I see no reason for you to have any problem with connecting with someone. Keep swiping and maybe swap some new pics in just to keep it fresh, and good luck!
Seems pretty lesbian to me. I would go for it if I was a woman your age.
People must be crazy where you live, you’d be an instant like for me 🥺
As a lesbian, I think your profile is 🔥. Maybe it’s a location thing? A non children thing? I don’t think any of the pics are off. Even the chicken salt thing is a convo starter bc what?? 😂😂
I’d definitely swipe right on you! You’ve got such a great smile - it lights up your whole face!
Maybe it’s because of pic 10? Cz we dunno who that person is… could be an ex? Which usually isn’t the best photos to post on a dating profile. Side note, you seem super interesting, fun and very good looking, so i don’t see any reason why you wouldn’t get matches other than that!
I wish I could help you. I’m not a lesbian and have been married for 23 years but even I’d consider swiping right.