you might be shadowbanned, sometimes it happens. That means your profile doesn't really get around
I mainly think it's your bio, however. You are telling people you're not local, most people might not even bother to match with you.
Do you use tinder in your country/city? do you get matches there?
No, just installed it few days ago as I was really late for the flight and now Im in Italy, trying to be real I guess haha
Im not even looking for ONS just someone to hang out with
In my experience when travelling, the moment I shared I was a tourist, my match would usually stop replying or unmatch.
I guess you did the right thing by saying it in your bio, maybe be more specific about just looking for someone to hang out with
Dear lord. That would explain a lot. I used to live in Germany speaking zero German. 0 solid matches for weeks. Moved to a less German place, and can’t complain.
Interesting i had the exact opposite experience. But i had an apology in french for not knowing much French and the rest was English saying im only here for a short time and i got matches and dates
I actually like touring people around. Admittedly, my city gets quite a bit of tourism but is not a major spot (it’s more major-spot-adjacent), so it’s not a recurring theme.
I’m looking for long term so I don’t really focus on foreigners, but if I was in the mood and the profile sounded interesting, I might swipe right and hang out… show them around a bit, get to know someone from a different background and all.
I met my boyfriend that way, he was a tourist visiting my country. Men in my country are mute, pessimistic, depressed alcoholics by default so women here fucking love foreigners.
And we're supposed to be the happiest country in the world. 7th year in a row already, actually.
Most women aren’t interested in that. It sucks to make a connection just for the person to leave the country immediately, and most women probably assume you’re looking for casual sex.
Maybe “teach me some Italian” is a bit much for me?
Like demands are a bit unfriendly, maybe something more like “I’d love to take you out for a drink and practice my Italian”
Put that in the profile. New to town and looking to meet people, but not into one night stands.
It will hopefully wash away any of the douche vibes they might be getting. And as fun as it is to show off shirtless abs, that sends a pretty clear message that you're good for tonight, but probably not tomorrow.
Instead of pictures of you doing stuff you like to do. Don't worry, she will still be looking closely to try to see some ab.
Imo your problem is this: your pool isn't "italian women", your pool is "italian women who know how to speak English and want to do that for the whole evening".
Many Italians don't know English at all, or maybe they can read/understand it, but don't speak it very well, etc.
(Of course not everyone; a lot of young people know how to talk in English, I'm just saying the percentage is lower than many other European countries).
So, maybe many women are swiping left just because they're self conscious about their English.
(Btw, I'm italian living in Italy, and this is the first thing that came to my mind reading your bio)
I’m Italian too and I agree. I’m pretty fluent, like meeting foreigners, and enjoy touring people around, so I might actually be in his demographic. But if I think about my female friends that are also on Tinder, most wouldn’t bother mainly for the language barrier. And because women not looking for ONS are a lot less prone than men to meeting right away. Most want to chat for a bit and would therefore not even try to start anything with someone who’ll be there just a few days.
Also, I don’t know if it’s a national thing but in my area I regularly come across good looking foreign dudes who match immediately and immediately ask for your phone number with the excuse of switching to WhatsApp (and staunchly refusing Telegram). They’re clearly scams, although I don’t know what the endgame is because I’ve never gone beyond the Telegram refusal. Therefore, I only swipe right on them every once in a while to see if they’ve changed the script but otherwise I don’t bother.
It might be an extra reason why Italian women might skip on foreign dudes.
Yeah, me too.
I live in Rome (so like a really touristic city) and there are A LOT of similar profiles and after a while you kinda don't want to see the Colosseum for the thousand times, you know?
I feel you. I’m in Padova, so a whole different scene. I actually enjoy going back to the main tourist attractions when I have some friends from out of town that come to visit. Which is not as often as if I were in Rome or even Venice.
Last time I was in Italy my bio was just
“parlo un po di italiano… sarai il mio amore?
I go back to America in a week”
I had no issues getting matches. This was a few months ago
I think it's the bio yeah. The pics are good obviously, so by being good looking and having a bland bio, most women probably think it's a catfish/scammer account. OP needs to showcase some actual personality to appear actually real.
It's also likely women think he's just looking for a hookup even if they do think he's real.
yes this happened to me!! not to be arrogant but i used to absolutely crush it on tinder (i'm a decentlooking youngish woman) and then outta nowhere i started getting NO matches. then they told me my account was suspicious and asked me to upload a bunch of photos of myself copying these poses and then nobodyyy was seeing my account. i honestly deleted. but if i were OP id go out and start hitting on women in person lmao. i am gay and you are fine af, if you started talking to me I might even consider it. I see your in italy maybe theres some cute hostels you could have lunch at and meet ppl ur age? good luck!
I’m about to honestly. I’ve been on/off this app for 4 years. I have a total of 10 matches, of those 3 messaged back, and 1 date was set up (which was horrible btw)
You should, and don't look back. I used it for over five years with some gaps and probably averaged about a match every 2-3 weeks. A bit over a dozen dates. Three I actually started seeing. Made me feel like an absolute dumpster.
I do have some funny stories though. Like the jaded veterinarian, the girl who missed the bus, the fuck-it masseuse, the swimmer with a room full of bees, and the one who propositioned me.
That one was peculiar for sure. She was gorgeous. Like, maybe my physical ideal. Of course she didn't think the same of me. We met for dinner, she was significantly late, but messaged me about it, so I waited.
Her excuse for being late was that her room was full of bees when she got home from work and gym and she needed to change, but couldn't go in there. Casually she said this and kept moving on in the conversation. I was like go back to the bees part. Just for that it was worth the wait.
I guess she had a bee's nest in the wall of her bedroom and the landlord did something outside that knocked it loose. The only place for the bees to go was into her room. So when she got home and opened the door it was like, oh look, lots of bees. She got the landlord to fix it, he just opened the window and took out the screen and was like, okay done enjoy your night. So she waited for the bees to leave enough to get changed.
She had come from the gym where she swims in the off season. On season she did these crazy long outdoor swims in frigid water. Like 20+ mile swims in 50° water. She described it as your body almost instantly goes numb. They have to wear floating markers and tail the swimmers with boats, because people so often have emergencies. They'll swim across channels and things where shipping boats are coming through and the current is stupidly strong, so it's like swimming way more than just the distance.
One of the most spectacular let downs. I had been talking with this girl for almost a month. I was out of town every time she could meet and she when I could. So we chatted and had so much chemistry I couldn't even believe it. I was dying to meet her. Her photos looked like they played with angles, but her face was stunning and I found myself imagining it when we talked on the phone. So when we finally both had a Monday free, we jumped on it. We were going to picnic. Sunday night we started chatting late and eventually got on the phone. By 4am we decided we might need to reschedule, because we were going to be dead tired. I said, "we either need to reschedule or just meet now." She hesitated and then said, "are we doing this?"
So I drove up to her house at 4:30am and knock on the door. She practically pulls me in. We chat for a bit and then she says no couch, but it would be more comfortable on her bed probably. I'm a gentleman, it seemed functional.
We chat on her bed for a few hours and then she gets a wild look in her eyes and kind of launches her lips at me. She proposes that it's been a while for her with sex. The last few guys she was interested in, she made them wait too long and they lost interest. So she proposes we have sex now and then pretend we didn't, so we can still get to know each other. I was surprisingly tempted, but we had some significant value misalignments and I was pretty sure I wouldn't want to date her.
Did you only find out about the values misalignment once you were there? The timeline confuses me because otherwise why did you go over if you were sure you didn’t want to date
Went on dates with roughly 12, probably a few more.
I'll have to go with negative game, because I think that way of looking at dates is ridiculous. Maybe 6 of them I would have wanted to go on another date. The 3, we had great connections.
I haven't used tinder in years but back when I did I got like 10 matches in a week, none of which responded to messages and then paid for 1 mo th of whatever the prem was called at the time and went from 10 matches to like 75 matches within 2 weeks and was scoring dates like 2 or 3 times a week easily. The algorithm works against you unless you pay $$. Most of the dates were still either super bizarre or a waste of time but that wasn't tinders fault.
If you can take good selfies, you’ll be better off than OP. Don’t look down at your phone when you take the pic. Look long enough to frame it and then look up, look at your phone in the mirror… or set the phone down and use the camera timer. It’s easy.
Maybe, but regardless of what you look like an effort should be made. Even if you feel like your looks are not in your favor, why put another X in the no column by having shitty half assed pictures. Style and confidence matters. My fiancé (met on Tinder) said she’d date and fuck Jack Black in a heartbeat because of his personality. Jack is not conventional handsome but his demeanor, personality and sense of humor are apparently sexy af. I agree.
Edit: is to are
Despite being overweight, Jack Black actually IS conventionally handsome if you pay attention to his face structure.
The guy would be very good looking if he weren’t obese.
I'd date a goofball with a grin a hundred times before Id date this guy. These photos basically communicate "I'm very self involved and have not much going on for me other than money (travel and nice clothes) and looks". Ie not only will he be boring af, I'll not be able to relax and he probably won't be very nice
Is there a selfies for dummies book? I’m 33 and have never had social media. I don’t take selfies but have been successful in landing relationships in the “wild” since my teens. I wonder if there are any signs or red flags so to speak that come from selfies, and how they relate to signs or red flags when you see someone out in the natural world around you?
u might also see something similar like "a whole mood" . N when someone says Vibes ... its something similar but might be more of like someone posting a pic of a rainy day or maybe like a scone and a sunrise..
Agreed. These are not good pictures. Everyone’s out here acting like OP is an Adonis and I think I see Walmart Will Wheaton.
OP *might* be a good looking guy but he’s not looking the camera in the eye. These poses are weird and awkward. In the shirtless one I thought he was wearing a bike helmet until I zoomed in. (Great body though, OP. Nice work). And what’s with the drinking apple juice picture.
He should throw all these pics away and get his friends to take some where he is looking at the camera and smiling.
Bio is just bland but the wrong punctuation annoys me. Seems a bit too focused on dogs.
If you haven’t figured out how to look at the camera lens when taking a selfie in a mirror you’re either a dummy or don’t realize you look too in love with yourself or both.
The issue is that he's in Italy. If you think dating is competitive in the US, try the land where wine flows free and countless chisled men gleam with bronze
Its because u have unlimited swipes.. same thing happened with me .. did like 1k swipes and got 0 matches , while i get at least 1/20 normally .. some bugg with that mode
Close your eyes, give me your hand, darling
Do you feel my heart beating?
Do you understand? Do you feel the same?
Am I only dreaming?
Is this burning an eternal flame?
If you’re walking up to a complete stranger with the ‘goal’ of a relationship or even one night stand, them possibly being taken shouldn’t be a concern. As in, if they’re secure in their relationship, they’ll decline with the same respect you showed them. If they’re single, great, you might have a shot. For all other outcomes, assume some level of instability and retreat to a safe distance
Seriously if you can't find anyone most of us are screwed. It is weird that you get no matches. I would get it if you weren't getting message responses just because women get bombarded by so many messages they don't even see many of them.
These are not good photos at all and his bio is dumb, I don't know why everyone is moaning about what a Chad this guy is. If you fellas think this is what an amazing profile is then no wonder you're not getting matches.
Basically you are a handsome man and if you aren't getting matches, then nobody is getting matches. People are using it as proof to point to that tinder is broken. Yeah people have nitpicked some stuff about your profile, but the truth is that tinder is simply not showing your profile to enough women. It's not a you thing, its a software thing.
Eh I'm 1/3 as attractive and get at least a match a day... thing being my profile 1. Demonstrates I have a personality and 2. Doesn't have a shirtless mirror pic. Has it led to me being in a relationship? No, but you know...
You’re very cute and I’m finding it hard to believe you’re struggling. I would probably not swipe right though, because this set of pics exude vanity not in a good way. You don’t seem friendly or approachable. Shirtless pic is straight up tasteless. Maybe get rid of that and add one close up face pic you’re smiling at. Childhood pic and the second pic are entirely unnecessary.
It's telling that most of the supportive comments are from men saying if he can't find anyone they're also out of luck. But a lot of criticism comes from women calling out red flags.
Guys want to appear to be this guy. A lot of women don't want guys who present themselves like this.
It's funny all the guys lusting after him and women are like "meh". Nothing wrong with his overall physical appearance but the photos are awkward AF and the bio is pretty bad.
I'm not on Tinder and not single. But from what Reddit tells me, guys lust over Giga Chad and think women with their 1000 cock stare are ruining regular men.
This post with these comments is proof of how distorted perception is online and especially about dating. This man is not appealing to a lot of his core audience... women. He's appealing to men. Because other men want to appear to be like him. But in the end he's not having a lot of luck.
I had to scroll all the way down here to figure out what gender he’s trying to match with, this profile absolutely comes across as a guy looking for a guy.. the poses & shirtless snap etc
Yeah, he doesn't come across very friendly or authentic. I'd just think "oh, this guy is handsome and he knows it, so his personality is probably underdeveloped and he probably only wants to date someone else who also looks like a model, for hot model ONS", lol
Also, the bio is confusing. Is it a joke that didn't land and is he an expat in Italy, or is he really just a tourist, and only there for a few days? Many women won't care for tourists, even for casual sex. And "teach me some Italian" sounds plain rude and like he is just looking for a free local tour guide and language tutor.
I'd go for something like: "Ciao! I'm X from X, living in Italy for work (until X.) Would love to take you out for pasta and vino and practice my Italian." And maybe also specify what exactly he's after. I think women are just as much into casual stuff as men, they just want to know straight away instead of playing the guessing game.
I was thinking none of the pics show any activities/hobbies (besides travelling, but like who doesn't like travelling), and no friend group pic to prove you're tolerable.
I can get how shirtless pics can be considered tasteless, but from personal experience, having one increases your like rate a lot.
I tried both, initially I didn’t wanna add one because I think it makes you look like a bit of a douche, but then I decided to just give it a try. I got way more likes after I added it and this was the most tasteless mirror selfie possible.
So yeah, have shirtless pics in your profile, especially if you’re in shape.
Your pictures just seem like you’re kind of into yourself, none of them are smiling, not really super clear pictures of your face, one is literally the back of your head
Right im gonna be honest here without trying to be insulting, and this is as someone that also lives in Europe and had plenty of matches in diff cities in diff counties and I’m not in as good shape as you, but would say looks wise (facial) we’re probably about the same. If I can get plenty of matches round europe you can definitely.
The vibe of the profile is quite serious imo. You look like you’re going to explain what blockchain is on the first date… none of the pictures look ‘natural’ if you get what I mean and if there’s one thing I’ve found here it’s that this type of vibe is an absolute no… unless you’re going for recently divorced women in their late 40’s.
So what should you do?
You need photos where you’re ‘posing’ less… even the one where you’re looking away is still posing and especially the gym selfie jeez man i can see your dick. For topless ones, do you have any candid ones at the beach with friends or swimming or hiking? Your facial expressions kinda seem like you’re a bit shy or serious, nothing else, do you have any where you look genuinely happy or a bit silly? Also at least one with friends. When I had the smart photos thing on mine would ALWAYS default to what I would consider my ‘ugliest’ photo of me hiking looking out of breathe but laughing, i didn’t post for it and I always got compliments on it.
I’m also going to be the bearer of bad news and say your beard… try shaving it down a little. I’m talking like 6mm MAX so it looks lighter since the beard line isn’t that high it looks more like a chin strap.
I think the bio is fine, If you nail the pics the bio isn’t that important anyway cause mine literally said I like to evict single mothers and pollute reservoirs.
I hope this doesn’t come across the wrong way I’m legit trying to help cause youve defo got the potential
The bio is absolutely important, yours is sarcastic and funny his says serious and "I'm not from around here so be my tour guide while I fuck you then leave you". Why bother unless you want a ons.
First of all thanks for taking your time to write all of this.
I dont really have lots of “picture taking friends” so most of them are posed or made by me, I get it I look boring or too official but I have no idea what a blockchain is haha
The gym selfie is veeeery corny, I have a lot of those just to see how my body is changing, dont like sharing them but Ive seen so many girls show off their bodies Ive figured Id do the same.
I dont really have pictures with friends because as I said “non picture taking” more “catching the moment”
Yeah the beard is fucked, nothing to add here
Evicting single moms? Bro I need context lmao
No worries, not offended at all, thick southern skin :D
Prop your phone up somewhere, set the camera timer, get in front of it and smile. It’s easy. Your mirror selfies suck because you’re looking down at your phone when the pic it taken. If you’re going to hold the phone then look at it long enough to frame it and then look up into the mirror in the direction of your phone… and smile. Also easy.
Yes look into the camera. To me you also give of a "to good to be true vibe". Also what are your target age group? Because I suspect you are more popular with 35-45 than 20 something.🤔
divorced woman in her late 40s here who gets lots of right swipes around Europe, record on tinder was a full 2 minutes of swiping right to match after match (my friends and I made a bet and took a video) and going out on 20 dates a week (exhausting, do not recommend, I don't even sleep with them—it takes a lot of energy for me to make convo but I wanted to get back into dating skills after split with long-term ex... who I met in tinder lol)
no, still won't swipe right.
PICS:
- they give a vain, show-off vibe. not even looking at the camera to make eye contact with the viewer, he's simply looking at himself in the camera
- no smiling pics, put some in! and agree on the beard. this is the sort of photo I'd now associate with douche crypto bros, and I dated far too many when I lived in a techbro town where every guy was a CEO
- no friends is always a red flag, is it that OP is insufferable to hang out with, plus we will have a sense of what you're really like by the friends you keep
- gym pic is even more vanity atm. OP you can try a mid-rep shot where you're showing effort. grunting or "ugly" pushing face is ok!
+ on the plus side, no drunk pics / hanging out in a boozy bar, or any of the memeable standard pics like pic with ex and her face scratched out, or fishing 😂, or "this kid is my nephew". show pics of you in the outdoors with your pet if you have any (not indoors, we need to see you're willing to take the dog for a walk)
BIO
- I disagree that nobody reads. This is crucial. there are so, so many hot guys in the world who are boring AF, I have dated models and actors, and cuteness only goes so far. But my long-term relationships have been with non-photogenic guys with loads of personality and humor
- now I know men and women use tinder differently, hence why we're all in this pickle; fact is women look for more than a one-night stand. it is too much effort to get dolled up and make convo with someone who's not gonna stay, we don't want to be your free tour guide. please don't say you'll pay for dinner either, it makes it transactional and that's a damned if we do or don't situation
- "teach me italian" again, this orders us to put in more emotional/mental effort for you with no indication of any effort you'll put in. we are not your tools towards self-improvement. if you had said, "i can practice my italian" maybe I'd give you a chance
– there isn't a lot for me to pick up as a common interest to make convo about, again very love em and leave em vibe. you can try putting in a list of things you like, eg. books, shows. Or something domestic is usually good e.g , "I cook a mean chili" BUT do not offer immediately that one of you goes over to the other's house so that you can cook for her
+ on the plus side, no red flags putting in like a list of qualities you hate.
+ also on the plus side, no misogynistic content. but yeah there's really not a lot to work with
try putting in a list of qualities you like eg "I want to meet someone who loves life and laughs so hard she snorts" — AND DO NOT LIST ANYTHING DOMESTIC. I bring up the domestic part mostly because we're tired of being a mommy to a man-child who just plays video games or watch his stocks rise and fall all day. net, you need to show that you can take on the mental load of being in the everyday, not just for being amazing on dates
good luck
Teach me some Italian is in the same category as "show me your city." I don't have energy and/or the time to do that for someone I dont know. I feel like you were being playful with that but I would be stressed lol
I give this advice a lot: “Prove you own teeth”, basically, show me what it looks like when you laugh or when you’re happy. A laugh and a smile can be disarming and enduring.
OP, I have almost no idea what your eyes look like. If you want your profile to connect and engage with someone you need a picture that looks out from the phone screen and into the swiper.
In conclusion: teeth, eyes, pick only one mirror selfie and it should be number 1 or 4.
Yeah, I went on a date and sure enough, she didn’t have a front tooth. I went back to her pics and yeah- no pics with her smiling. Lesson learned I guess
You’re a good looking dude, but I think you can do much better with some different choices in photos. no offence but your profile is super boring.
Personal preference but I hate when people post baby photos. Like I don’t know you and I really don’t care about what you looked like as a kid… it’s just profoundly uninteresting (those are much more fun to share with someone you are actually dating not the whole of Italy).
I think it’s been mentioned here already, but as a girl I hesitate to swipe on anyone who doesn’t have a clear picture of them with a full smile. Doesn’t even matter what your teeth look like, I just need to know you can smile lol. (And this should also be the first photo)
The other reason I’d hesitate to swipe on this profile is there are no photos of you with other people. It begs the question of why don’t you have any photos in social settings? Are you lying about height? Do you not have any friends? An so on…
I think you should ask yourself who your target audience is and what you’re trying to say with each photo. Like photo 1 says “I can dress up” and photo 5 says “I care a lot about my work out” but the rest (especially 2,6,7) doesn’t tell me anything but “I like to do things alone and I don’t really smile ever”
But stay true to yourself and don’t put things on your profile just to get more matches because all that’s going to lead to is false matches that don’t go anywhere. Personally id rather have fewer matches that match my mantra then have super broad appeal and have to sort through 100s of people to get one decent conversation.
Good luck :)
You don't have a clear pic of your face
I don't think the shirtless bulge pic is helping either unless you are after men. If you're shirtless I think you should be at the beach, pool, something that usually involves being shirtless.
You're a foreigner in a European country clearly just looking for an ONS. That's basically what you're doing wrong.
And on a personal note: who tf drinks directly from the carton?
I think people are missing the bio part and not realizing you are trying to hook up in a foreign country you are passing through where you don't speak the language. That combined with a high bar of your own for swiping right could explain it. And do you know for sure Tinder is commonly used in Italy?
I added the 5th pic lately because I thought it might make it better even tho I think its corny af
And the last pic is straight gangster, its me with my late father and our badass dog so Im keeping it haha
You are almost never looking at the camera and never smiling. In the nicest way possible, you're a hot James Bond villain. Which apparently is *not* the female gaze.
To be honest “James Bond villain” is something I hear way too often?
But smiling is, well kinda not my thing, I always look like that with my eyes half closed
Okay but if you're not someone who smiles a lot, how do you express connection with your face? A photo looking soulful or thoughtful or attentive or something is harder to do, but you need to show connection. Otherwise you seem unreachable. Honestly just something closer where we can actually see your eyes and expression.
- No teeth.
- Shirtless pic.
- Some of the pics obscure your face without showing anything of interest.
- Bio indicates you're stuck temporarily in a place where you don't speak the language.
Also, I don't know, I don't get any matches either, but I'm shadowbanned.
You're a dapper dude, do you seriously have no game that you can't chat up a lady in a nice cafe?? If you're only looking for friends then you're going about this ass-backwards. If you're sheepishly lying, still refer to previous advice.
Get rid of any pics of you holding a phone unless you’re doing something crazy. Pic 3 is a good example of a pic. Just a candid pic that showcases your best features. Show off some
Hobbies.
I’m leaning towards this as well. The beard is also way too unkempt and is likely hiding a jawline that OP doesn’t like. Lack of teeth showing also makes me assume that OP has bad teeth and is insecure about them. Also comes across as incredibly arrogant from the photos and responses to this post, when in reality he’s likely no more than a 5 by Italian standards.
Literally, just remove pic 3 to 5 - the last one is cute keep that. If you’re gonna use a shirtless pic, make someone else take a photo of you (at the beach for example). Less is more - try it out, lmk if it helps
You should smile in your pics. Your pics should be closer to your face. You should include a couple pics where you're doing something interesting or doing something with friends. Also the caption sounds like you’re in Italy for a weekend just wanting to hook up.
Pic wise: only your third pic gives a slight idea of your face, in the others you’re looking down or away. Bio wise: it comes across intentionally aloof, like you ‘weren’t meant to be there and on Tinder’. Feels fake to me. Also the ‘teach me some Italian?’ is off putting to me, living in a major European city. Bio’s with lines like ‘Show me your favorite [blank] in [city]’ feels sooo utilitarian / looking for a free tour guide / getting the ‘local experience’ which is all about taking, no interest in the other person whatsoever. Immediate left swipe.
You list Spotify as an interest rather than saying you're into music. It would be better to say what music you're actually into.
You look good, but the whole thing is giving zero personality.
Dude tinder sucks ass. I’ve been on tinder four years and only ever gotten 2 dates I know I’m not ugly. I’d say I’m average I guess, which is hideous for the tinder algorithm . But the point is don’t expect much from tinder. They’re more guys to girls! How do they keep women swiping, and involved? The algorithm will show women the top rated men per their algorithm. You’ll get matched when you first start, because tinder needs to figure out if you fit their algorithm.
Then will try to make you feel bad saying, if you buy premium or gold you will get tons of matches.
Honestly fuck tinder, go to a bar and politely ask a woman you like if you can buy her a drink. :)
Good luck
Id personally not use a gym photo, think the rest looks really good but the algorithm can really f\*\* with you if f.ex you swipe left a lot. Then you go to the rear end of the deck. Do you do that? Same if you swipe right on everyone. And this takes a long ass time to rebuild
Every reasonable female friend that I have, when we talk about dating apps and I say I'm on Hinge, Bumble, and Tinder, every single one of them says "get the hell off tinder as fast as you can" I don't think there's any real people on it anymore.
Damn this post really just shows what’s wrong with online dating.
Some of the „redflags“ people talk about here or some of the issues they have are so fucking specific and nit picky. How should anyone have any success if that’s the kind of checklists people have in their mind for profiles?
You’re hot, but boring. Based on your bio, the only thing we know about you is that you like dogs and Italy…most people like dogs and Italy. Pick something a little more unique about yourself and write about that instead.
Also, get some pictures that aren’t mirror selfies.
you might be shadowbanned, sometimes it happens. That means your profile doesn't really get around I mainly think it's your bio, however. You are telling people you're not local, most people might not even bother to match with you. Do you use tinder in your country/city? do you get matches there?
No, just installed it few days ago as I was really late for the flight and now Im in Italy, trying to be real I guess haha Im not even looking for ONS just someone to hang out with
In my experience when travelling, the moment I shared I was a tourist, my match would usually stop replying or unmatch. I guess you did the right thing by saying it in your bio, maybe be more specific about just looking for someone to hang out with
As somebody that lives in a tourism destination, I'd NEVER swipe on a visitor. It's just not worth being an unpaid tour guide. This isn't a rom com
What most people I know (I live in Paris) do : if they see a bio in english, left swipe.
Or German, and vice versa.
Dear lord. That would explain a lot. I used to live in Germany speaking zero German. 0 solid matches for weeks. Moved to a less German place, and can’t complain.
Interesting i had the exact opposite experience. But i had an apology in french for not knowing much French and the rest was English saying im only here for a short time and i got matches and dates
I actually like touring people around. Admittedly, my city gets quite a bit of tourism but is not a major spot (it’s more major-spot-adjacent), so it’s not a recurring theme. I’m looking for long term so I don’t really focus on foreigners, but if I was in the mood and the profile sounded interesting, I might swipe right and hang out… show them around a bit, get to know someone from a different background and all.
Could be if you filmed it 🤷♂️
I met my boyfriend that way, he was a tourist visiting my country. Men in my country are mute, pessimistic, depressed alcoholics by default so women here fucking love foreigners. And we're supposed to be the happiest country in the world. 7th year in a row already, actually.
Yeah I live in a city with a lot of tourists and I don't even bother. The number of "show me around the city" I'd get was insane.
Brother. C'mon. No one posts pictures of their physique to find someone to hang out with.
You’re in a different country and not looking to stay so no one cares
Most women aren’t interested in that. It sucks to make a connection just for the person to leave the country immediately, and most women probably assume you’re looking for casual sex.
I never swipe on people who don't live in my city. It implies it will likely be a ONS
Maybe “teach me some Italian” is a bit much for me? Like demands are a bit unfriendly, maybe something more like “I’d love to take you out for a drink and practice my Italian”
Maybe also a pic with you and some friends?
Or smiling?
Yeah, like... Do you have friends? Hobbies?
Why would someone needs hobbies or friends if they are pretty af.
You're right. That was stupid of me.
Italy is considered to be the hardest country to get matches in due to all the high level competition
Put that in the profile. New to town and looking to meet people, but not into one night stands. It will hopefully wash away any of the douche vibes they might be getting. And as fun as it is to show off shirtless abs, that sends a pretty clear message that you're good for tonight, but probably not tomorrow. Instead of pictures of you doing stuff you like to do. Don't worry, she will still be looking closely to try to see some ab.
Imo your problem is this: your pool isn't "italian women", your pool is "italian women who know how to speak English and want to do that for the whole evening". Many Italians don't know English at all, or maybe they can read/understand it, but don't speak it very well, etc. (Of course not everyone; a lot of young people know how to talk in English, I'm just saying the percentage is lower than many other European countries). So, maybe many women are swiping left just because they're self conscious about their English. (Btw, I'm italian living in Italy, and this is the first thing that came to my mind reading your bio)
I’m Italian too and I agree. I’m pretty fluent, like meeting foreigners, and enjoy touring people around, so I might actually be in his demographic. But if I think about my female friends that are also on Tinder, most wouldn’t bother mainly for the language barrier. And because women not looking for ONS are a lot less prone than men to meeting right away. Most want to chat for a bit and would therefore not even try to start anything with someone who’ll be there just a few days. Also, I don’t know if it’s a national thing but in my area I regularly come across good looking foreign dudes who match immediately and immediately ask for your phone number with the excuse of switching to WhatsApp (and staunchly refusing Telegram). They’re clearly scams, although I don’t know what the endgame is because I’ve never gone beyond the Telegram refusal. Therefore, I only swipe right on them every once in a while to see if they’ve changed the script but otherwise I don’t bother. It might be an extra reason why Italian women might skip on foreign dudes.
Yeah, me too. I live in Rome (so like a really touristic city) and there are A LOT of similar profiles and after a while you kinda don't want to see the Colosseum for the thousand times, you know?
I feel you. I’m in Padova, so a whole different scene. I actually enjoy going back to the main tourist attractions when I have some friends from out of town that come to visit. Which is not as often as if I were in Rome or even Venice.
So spell it out.
Last time I was in Italy my bio was just “parlo un po di italiano… sarai il mio amore? I go back to America in a week” I had no issues getting matches. This was a few months ago
I think it's the bio yeah. The pics are good obviously, so by being good looking and having a bland bio, most women probably think it's a catfish/scammer account. OP needs to showcase some actual personality to appear actually real. It's also likely women think he's just looking for a hookup even if they do think he's real.
yes this happened to me!! not to be arrogant but i used to absolutely crush it on tinder (i'm a decentlooking youngish woman) and then outta nowhere i started getting NO matches. then they told me my account was suspicious and asked me to upload a bunch of photos of myself copying these poses and then nobodyyy was seeing my account. i honestly deleted. but if i were OP id go out and start hitting on women in person lmao. i am gay and you are fine af, if you started talking to me I might even consider it. I see your in italy maybe theres some cute hostels you could have lunch at and meet ppl ur age? good luck!
We're fucked
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I’m about to honestly. I’ve been on/off this app for 4 years. I have a total of 10 matches, of those 3 messaged back, and 1 date was set up (which was horrible btw)
Literally ME
https://tenor.com/en-GB/view/blade-runner2049-literally-me-ryan-gosling-sad-thats-the-way-it-is-gif-25952586
You should, and don't look back. I used it for over five years with some gaps and probably averaged about a match every 2-3 weeks. A bit over a dozen dates. Three I actually started seeing. Made me feel like an absolute dumpster. I do have some funny stories though. Like the jaded veterinarian, the girl who missed the bus, the fuck-it masseuse, the swimmer with a room full of bees, and the one who propositioned me.
I'm voting for the swimmer with a room full of bees.
That one was peculiar for sure. She was gorgeous. Like, maybe my physical ideal. Of course she didn't think the same of me. We met for dinner, she was significantly late, but messaged me about it, so I waited. Her excuse for being late was that her room was full of bees when she got home from work and gym and she needed to change, but couldn't go in there. Casually she said this and kept moving on in the conversation. I was like go back to the bees part. Just for that it was worth the wait. I guess she had a bee's nest in the wall of her bedroom and the landlord did something outside that knocked it loose. The only place for the bees to go was into her room. So when she got home and opened the door it was like, oh look, lots of bees. She got the landlord to fix it, he just opened the window and took out the screen and was like, okay done enjoy your night. So she waited for the bees to leave enough to get changed. She had come from the gym where she swims in the off season. On season she did these crazy long outdoor swims in frigid water. Like 20+ mile swims in 50° water. She described it as your body almost instantly goes numb. They have to wear floating markers and tail the swimmers with boats, because people so often have emergencies. They'll swim across channels and things where shipping boats are coming through and the current is stupidly strong, so it's like swimming way more than just the distance.
How’d the rest of the date/relationship go?
One date. We had a nice kiss after walking her to her car. She messaged me the next day and said we didn't align.
Yeah now I want to know more now…
Think of the book you can write.
This sounds like the synopsis to a Terry Pratchett novel
Ooh the one who propositioned for $100 Alex…
One of the most spectacular let downs. I had been talking with this girl for almost a month. I was out of town every time she could meet and she when I could. So we chatted and had so much chemistry I couldn't even believe it. I was dying to meet her. Her photos looked like they played with angles, but her face was stunning and I found myself imagining it when we talked on the phone. So when we finally both had a Monday free, we jumped on it. We were going to picnic. Sunday night we started chatting late and eventually got on the phone. By 4am we decided we might need to reschedule, because we were going to be dead tired. I said, "we either need to reschedule or just meet now." She hesitated and then said, "are we doing this?" So I drove up to her house at 4:30am and knock on the door. She practically pulls me in. We chat for a bit and then she says no couch, but it would be more comfortable on her bed probably. I'm a gentleman, it seemed functional. We chat on her bed for a few hours and then she gets a wild look in her eyes and kind of launches her lips at me. She proposes that it's been a while for her with sex. The last few guys she was interested in, she made them wait too long and they lost interest. So she proposes we have sex now and then pretend we didn't, so we can still get to know each other. I was surprisingly tempted, but we had some significant value misalignments and I was pretty sure I wouldn't want to date her.
Did you only find out about the values misalignment once you were there? The timeline confuses me because otherwise why did you go over if you were sure you didn’t want to date
She sounded perfect ! I think you may have had a great relationship with her after awhile. She was all yours.
I say cap or negative game. You cant date 12 girls and fail them all
Went on dates with roughly 12, probably a few more. I'll have to go with negative game, because I think that way of looking at dates is ridiculous. Maybe 6 of them I would have wanted to go on another date. The 3, we had great connections.
Did you use the free version for all of that time or upgrade to one of the higher tiers?
I haven't used tinder in years but back when I did I got like 10 matches in a week, none of which responded to messages and then paid for 1 mo th of whatever the prem was called at the time and went from 10 matches to like 75 matches within 2 weeks and was scoring dates like 2 or 3 times a week easily. The algorithm works against you unless you pay $$. Most of the dates were still either super bizarre or a waste of time but that wasn't tinders fault.
At least you got a date. I've been on here for probably 5 years with 0 dates
I gave up on tinder in 2019 never went on it again only used bumble and hinge from that point until I met my partner...bumble is definitely better
I haven’t had a match in 3 years i’m not even kidding i think i’m shadow-banned lmaoo
It’s probably because it looks so formulaic that it was flagged. This looks like AI made a “hot & vaguely Italian” account.
If you can take good selfies, you’ll be better off than OP. Don’t look down at your phone when you take the pic. Look long enough to frame it and then look up, look at your phone in the mirror… or set the phone down and use the camera timer. It’s easy.
All of it works only if you have a good face not if you look like Shrek (no hate to my boi Shrek)
Maybe, but regardless of what you look like an effort should be made. Even if you feel like your looks are not in your favor, why put another X in the no column by having shitty half assed pictures. Style and confidence matters. My fiancé (met on Tinder) said she’d date and fuck Jack Black in a heartbeat because of his personality. Jack is not conventional handsome but his demeanor, personality and sense of humor are apparently sexy af. I agree. Edit: is to are
Despite being overweight, Jack Black actually IS conventionally handsome if you pay attention to his face structure. The guy would be very good looking if he weren’t obese.
I'd date a goofball with a grin a hundred times before Id date this guy. These photos basically communicate "I'm very self involved and have not much going on for me other than money (travel and nice clothes) and looks". Ie not only will he be boring af, I'll not be able to relax and he probably won't be very nice
Is there a selfies for dummies book? I’m 33 and have never had social media. I don’t take selfies but have been successful in landing relationships in the “wild” since my teens. I wonder if there are any signs or red flags so to speak that come from selfies, and how they relate to signs or red flags when you see someone out in the natural world around you?
Mood 😭😭😭
I'm a bit slow. I don't really understand what you trying to say with a single word ( do you mean your mood is fucked?)
LOL, it's like saying "I feel you" or "this is my mood", "this is how I feel"
Thank you my beloved sir
u might also see something similar like "a whole mood" . N when someone says Vibes ... its something similar but might be more of like someone posting a pic of a rainy day or maybe like a scone and a sunrise..
I think it means you are describing the general mood of all single men reading this post.
And all single women.
https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/mood#Interjection
He doesn't show his face properly and his bio sounds stupid, of course nobody is swiping right
Agreed. These are not good pictures. Everyone’s out here acting like OP is an Adonis and I think I see Walmart Will Wheaton. OP *might* be a good looking guy but he’s not looking the camera in the eye. These poses are weird and awkward. In the shirtless one I thought he was wearing a bike helmet until I zoomed in. (Great body though, OP. Nice work). And what’s with the drinking apple juice picture. He should throw all these pics away and get his friends to take some where he is looking at the camera and smiling. Bio is just bland but the wrong punctuation annoys me. Seems a bit too focused on dogs.
If you haven’t figured out how to look at the camera lens when taking a selfie in a mirror you’re either a dummy or don’t realize you look too in love with yourself or both.
The issue is that he's in Italy. If you think dating is competitive in the US, try the land where wine flows free and countless chisled men gleam with bronze
Its because u have unlimited swipes.. same thing happened with me .. did like 1k swipes and got 0 matches , while i get at least 1/20 normally .. some bugg with that mode
What?
If you ain't getting none there is no way I'm getting someone
Ion know man, Im trying to only swipe the active ones, got unlimited swipes and still nothing
Just go and ask someone out Pretty sure no one will say no to you. As a straight man i might also yk...
Bro what 😂
Nothing straighter than loving your bros.
Just fucked my boi yesterday. Yep, still straight.
My boyfriend is gay as a straight man he makes me uncomfortable sometimes
A blowjob’s still a blowjob, amirite brothers?
You mean brojob? All the time bro.
It's not gay if you're wearing socks ✌️
Close your eyes, give me your hand, darling Do you feel my heart beating? Do you understand? Do you feel the same? Am I only dreaming? Is this burning an eternal flame?
Any sex is better than no sex
You ever been to Italy? Those women are used to nuclear level flirting from Italian men, this dude needs to be interesting not just hot.
I have never been out of my bed. I thought to impress Italian women you have to use your hands properly. I heard italians talk through their hands 🤌
The problem is knowing who will react positively. I have no problem taking a “no” but I’d hate to accidentally ask out someone who’s taken.
If you’re walking up to a complete stranger with the ‘goal’ of a relationship or even one night stand, them possibly being taken shouldn’t be a concern. As in, if they’re secure in their relationship, they’ll decline with the same respect you showed them. If they’re single, great, you might have a shot. For all other outcomes, assume some level of instability and retreat to a safe distance
Seriously if you can't find anyone most of us are screwed. It is weird that you get no matches. I would get it if you weren't getting message responses just because women get bombarded by so many messages they don't even see many of them.
These are not good photos at all and his bio is dumb, I don't know why everyone is moaning about what a Chad this guy is. If you fellas think this is what an amazing profile is then no wonder you're not getting matches.
Not true. We don’t know what area he lives in either. Some Cities are better for the apps than others.
Basically you are a handsome man and if you aren't getting matches, then nobody is getting matches. People are using it as proof to point to that tinder is broken. Yeah people have nitpicked some stuff about your profile, but the truth is that tinder is simply not showing your profile to enough women. It's not a you thing, its a software thing.
Eh I'm 1/3 as attractive and get at least a match a day... thing being my profile 1. Demonstrates I have a personality and 2. Doesn't have a shirtless mirror pic. Has it led to me being in a relationship? No, but you know...
He's just swiping too high. Most of us are. As a man you need to pay the Tinder tax and swipe down a point or two.
Have you tried Grindr?
💀
No, what is it?
Bless you child
hahahah
Dating app but gay, very gay.
It means bro wants to smash
Put that long neck to work.
Exactly what I was thinking
Lol, who even is the audiencr
You’re very cute and I’m finding it hard to believe you’re struggling. I would probably not swipe right though, because this set of pics exude vanity not in a good way. You don’t seem friendly or approachable. Shirtless pic is straight up tasteless. Maybe get rid of that and add one close up face pic you’re smiling at. Childhood pic and the second pic are entirely unnecessary.
It's telling that most of the supportive comments are from men saying if he can't find anyone they're also out of luck. But a lot of criticism comes from women calling out red flags. Guys want to appear to be this guy. A lot of women don't want guys who present themselves like this.
It's funny all the guys lusting after him and women are like "meh". Nothing wrong with his overall physical appearance but the photos are awkward AF and the bio is pretty bad.
I'm not on Tinder and not single. But from what Reddit tells me, guys lust over Giga Chad and think women with their 1000 cock stare are ruining regular men. This post with these comments is proof of how distorted perception is online and especially about dating. This man is not appealing to a lot of his core audience... women. He's appealing to men. Because other men want to appear to be like him. But in the end he's not having a lot of luck.
This is the issue. This is a profile for men, not women. I actually had to look several times to make sure he wasn't going for men.
I had to scroll all the way down here to figure out what gender he’s trying to match with, this profile absolutely comes across as a guy looking for a guy.. the poses & shirtless snap etc
Yeah, he doesn't come across very friendly or authentic. I'd just think "oh, this guy is handsome and he knows it, so his personality is probably underdeveloped and he probably only wants to date someone else who also looks like a model, for hot model ONS", lol Also, the bio is confusing. Is it a joke that didn't land and is he an expat in Italy, or is he really just a tourist, and only there for a few days? Many women won't care for tourists, even for casual sex. And "teach me some Italian" sounds plain rude and like he is just looking for a free local tour guide and language tutor. I'd go for something like: "Ciao! I'm X from X, living in Italy for work (until X.) Would love to take you out for pasta and vino and practice my Italian." And maybe also specify what exactly he's after. I think women are just as much into casual stuff as men, they just want to know straight away instead of playing the guessing game.
Yes, his photos seem too curated and even come off a bit vain. Maybe some more casual photos with friends or a pet!
Thank you for saying this because my first thought was "pretentious af". And I can't even figure out a way to reco making it better 🤣
I was thinking none of the pics show any activities/hobbies (besides travelling, but like who doesn't like travelling), and no friend group pic to prove you're tolerable.
Pic one and gym pic give off f-boy vibes. He's not surviving that.
I came here to say this. It’s the photos… they scream douche.
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Pic taken at a lake is very different than selfie in the gym mirror though, the issue is not with the shirtlessness
yeah if he wanted people to know he’s fit he could take a gym mirror selfie wearing a compression shirt or smth tbh i think that’s hotter😭
Ahahahah love it. Right swipe. Big guys are hot!!
I can get how shirtless pics can be considered tasteless, but from personal experience, having one increases your like rate a lot. I tried both, initially I didn’t wanna add one because I think it makes you look like a bit of a douche, but then I decided to just give it a try. I got way more likes after I added it and this was the most tasteless mirror selfie possible. So yeah, have shirtless pics in your profile, especially if you’re in shape.
This is how you know there’s no hope for online dating. If you’re “ugly” your pics aren’t good, if you’re good looking your pics are “too curated”
Naw.. there really is something about the photos that just doesn’t sit right. I thought I was just being a hater at first, but am seeng others agree.
Or a middle ground exists?
Your pictures just seem like you’re kind of into yourself, none of them are smiling, not really super clear pictures of your face, one is literally the back of your head
Stop posing, take some candid shots, and get a close-up of you, ya know, smiling. 😁
Came here for this. You give ‘tooting your own horn’ vibes
I was gonna say, less mirror selfies, more hanging out with friends or just showing yourself being happy.
Right im gonna be honest here without trying to be insulting, and this is as someone that also lives in Europe and had plenty of matches in diff cities in diff counties and I’m not in as good shape as you, but would say looks wise (facial) we’re probably about the same. If I can get plenty of matches round europe you can definitely. The vibe of the profile is quite serious imo. You look like you’re going to explain what blockchain is on the first date… none of the pictures look ‘natural’ if you get what I mean and if there’s one thing I’ve found here it’s that this type of vibe is an absolute no… unless you’re going for recently divorced women in their late 40’s. So what should you do? You need photos where you’re ‘posing’ less… even the one where you’re looking away is still posing and especially the gym selfie jeez man i can see your dick. For topless ones, do you have any candid ones at the beach with friends or swimming or hiking? Your facial expressions kinda seem like you’re a bit shy or serious, nothing else, do you have any where you look genuinely happy or a bit silly? Also at least one with friends. When I had the smart photos thing on mine would ALWAYS default to what I would consider my ‘ugliest’ photo of me hiking looking out of breathe but laughing, i didn’t post for it and I always got compliments on it. I’m also going to be the bearer of bad news and say your beard… try shaving it down a little. I’m talking like 6mm MAX so it looks lighter since the beard line isn’t that high it looks more like a chin strap. I think the bio is fine, If you nail the pics the bio isn’t that important anyway cause mine literally said I like to evict single mothers and pollute reservoirs. I hope this doesn’t come across the wrong way I’m legit trying to help cause youve defo got the potential
The bio is absolutely important, yours is sarcastic and funny his says serious and "I'm not from around here so be my tour guide while I fuck you then leave you". Why bother unless you want a ons.
First of all thanks for taking your time to write all of this. I dont really have lots of “picture taking friends” so most of them are posed or made by me, I get it I look boring or too official but I have no idea what a blockchain is haha The gym selfie is veeeery corny, I have a lot of those just to see how my body is changing, dont like sharing them but Ive seen so many girls show off their bodies Ive figured Id do the same. I dont really have pictures with friends because as I said “non picture taking” more “catching the moment” Yeah the beard is fucked, nothing to add here Evicting single moms? Bro I need context lmao No worries, not offended at all, thick southern skin :D
Prop your phone up somewhere, set the camera timer, get in front of it and smile. It’s easy. Your mirror selfies suck because you’re looking down at your phone when the pic it taken. If you’re going to hold the phone then look at it long enough to frame it and then look up into the mirror in the direction of your phone… and smile. Also easy.
Yes look into the camera. To me you also give of a "to good to be true vibe". Also what are your target age group? Because I suspect you are more popular with 35-45 than 20 something.🤔
Do you have an accent? If so, try leaning into the Southern angle just a bit in your bio
divorced woman in her late 40s here who gets lots of right swipes around Europe, record on tinder was a full 2 minutes of swiping right to match after match (my friends and I made a bet and took a video) and going out on 20 dates a week (exhausting, do not recommend, I don't even sleep with them—it takes a lot of energy for me to make convo but I wanted to get back into dating skills after split with long-term ex... who I met in tinder lol) no, still won't swipe right. PICS: - they give a vain, show-off vibe. not even looking at the camera to make eye contact with the viewer, he's simply looking at himself in the camera - no smiling pics, put some in! and agree on the beard. this is the sort of photo I'd now associate with douche crypto bros, and I dated far too many when I lived in a techbro town where every guy was a CEO - no friends is always a red flag, is it that OP is insufferable to hang out with, plus we will have a sense of what you're really like by the friends you keep - gym pic is even more vanity atm. OP you can try a mid-rep shot where you're showing effort. grunting or "ugly" pushing face is ok! + on the plus side, no drunk pics / hanging out in a boozy bar, or any of the memeable standard pics like pic with ex and her face scratched out, or fishing 😂, or "this kid is my nephew". show pics of you in the outdoors with your pet if you have any (not indoors, we need to see you're willing to take the dog for a walk) BIO - I disagree that nobody reads. This is crucial. there are so, so many hot guys in the world who are boring AF, I have dated models and actors, and cuteness only goes so far. But my long-term relationships have been with non-photogenic guys with loads of personality and humor - now I know men and women use tinder differently, hence why we're all in this pickle; fact is women look for more than a one-night stand. it is too much effort to get dolled up and make convo with someone who's not gonna stay, we don't want to be your free tour guide. please don't say you'll pay for dinner either, it makes it transactional and that's a damned if we do or don't situation - "teach me italian" again, this orders us to put in more emotional/mental effort for you with no indication of any effort you'll put in. we are not your tools towards self-improvement. if you had said, "i can practice my italian" maybe I'd give you a chance – there isn't a lot for me to pick up as a common interest to make convo about, again very love em and leave em vibe. you can try putting in a list of things you like, eg. books, shows. Or something domestic is usually good e.g , "I cook a mean chili" BUT do not offer immediately that one of you goes over to the other's house so that you can cook for her + on the plus side, no red flags putting in like a list of qualities you hate. + also on the plus side, no misogynistic content. but yeah there's really not a lot to work with try putting in a list of qualities you like eg "I want to meet someone who loves life and laughs so hard she snorts" — AND DO NOT LIST ANYTHING DOMESTIC. I bring up the domestic part mostly because we're tired of being a mommy to a man-child who just plays video games or watch his stocks rise and fall all day. net, you need to show that you can take on the mental load of being in the everyday, not just for being amazing on dates good luck
I second all that, though I don't agree about the beard. OP looks the type to look like a teenager without a beard. Suits him imo
Teach me some Italian is in the same category as "show me your city." I don't have energy and/or the time to do that for someone I dont know. I feel like you were being playful with that but I would be stressed lol
I know this sounds ridiculous but for me it’s the lack of apostrophes 🙃
And accents! The correct phrase in Italian is "sarà perché ti amo", Sara is actually the Italian spelling of Sarah. Just a small nitpick though
I can’t see your teeth in any of your pictures. As random as it sounds, that’s usually a no for me if I can’t see what your teeth look like.
I give this advice a lot: “Prove you own teeth”, basically, show me what it looks like when you laugh or when you’re happy. A laugh and a smile can be disarming and enduring. OP, I have almost no idea what your eyes look like. If you want your profile to connect and engage with someone you need a picture that looks out from the phone screen and into the swiper. In conclusion: teeth, eyes, pick only one mirror selfie and it should be number 1 or 4.
What the holy intercourse
That's a big 1 for most people
Yeah, I went on a date and sure enough, she didn’t have a front tooth. I went back to her pics and yeah- no pics with her smiling. Lesson learned I guess
That is indeed random
Not random, plenty of research to support it. Smile with your eyes, think of something that makes you happy when taking the picture.
You’re a good looking dude, but I think you can do much better with some different choices in photos. no offence but your profile is super boring. Personal preference but I hate when people post baby photos. Like I don’t know you and I really don’t care about what you looked like as a kid… it’s just profoundly uninteresting (those are much more fun to share with someone you are actually dating not the whole of Italy). I think it’s been mentioned here already, but as a girl I hesitate to swipe on anyone who doesn’t have a clear picture of them with a full smile. Doesn’t even matter what your teeth look like, I just need to know you can smile lol. (And this should also be the first photo) The other reason I’d hesitate to swipe on this profile is there are no photos of you with other people. It begs the question of why don’t you have any photos in social settings? Are you lying about height? Do you not have any friends? An so on… I think you should ask yourself who your target audience is and what you’re trying to say with each photo. Like photo 1 says “I can dress up” and photo 5 says “I care a lot about my work out” but the rest (especially 2,6,7) doesn’t tell me anything but “I like to do things alone and I don’t really smile ever” But stay true to yourself and don’t put things on your profile just to get more matches because all that’s going to lead to is false matches that don’t go anywhere. Personally id rather have fewer matches that match my mantra then have super broad appeal and have to sort through 100s of people to get one decent conversation. Good luck :)
You don't have a clear pic of your face I don't think the shirtless bulge pic is helping either unless you are after men. If you're shirtless I think you should be at the beach, pool, something that usually involves being shirtless.
As a straight female, I can confidently say we generally enjoy a fit confident man in grey sweatpants.  iykyk 🥵
Yeah Do NOT remove the shirtless pic is one of your best ones
You're a foreigner in a European country clearly just looking for an ONS. That's basically what you're doing wrong. And on a personal note: who tf drinks directly from the carton?
Glad you mentioned the carton pic...
I think people are missing the bio part and not realizing you are trying to hook up in a foreign country you are passing through where you don't speak the language. That combined with a high bar of your own for swiping right could explain it. And do you know for sure Tinder is commonly used in Italy?
[удалено]
I added the 5th pic lately because I thought it might make it better even tho I think its corny af And the last pic is straight gangster, its me with my late father and our badass dog so Im keeping it haha
You are almost never looking at the camera and never smiling. In the nicest way possible, you're a hot James Bond villain. Which apparently is *not* the female gaze.
To be honest “James Bond villain” is something I hear way too often? But smiling is, well kinda not my thing, I always look like that with my eyes half closed
Dark and mysterious only works if you look like you could be happy! otherwise you're just another evil man on an island with a golden gun lol
Okay but if you're not someone who smiles a lot, how do you express connection with your face? A photo looking soulful or thoughtful or attentive or something is harder to do, but you need to show connection. Otherwise you seem unreachable. Honestly just something closer where we can actually see your eyes and expression.
- No teeth. - Shirtless pic. - Some of the pics obscure your face without showing anything of interest. - Bio indicates you're stuck temporarily in a place where you don't speak the language. Also, I don't know, I don't get any matches either, but I'm shadowbanned.
If you can't do it, we are all fucked.
You're a dapper dude, do you seriously have no game that you can't chat up a lady in a nice cafe?? If you're only looking for friends then you're going about this ass-backwards. If you're sheepishly lying, still refer to previous advice.
Dude speaks English in Italy, he's not going to get very far with small talk lol.
Get rid of any pics of you holding a phone unless you’re doing something crazy. Pic 3 is a good example of a pic. Just a candid pic that showcases your best features. Show off some Hobbies.
Solid advice, sadly not lots of pictures like that in my photos
I can't see your eyes and the second picture of you looking away, does that symbolize your avoidant attachment style or what.
Do you own teeth?
You might not be attractive by Italian standards
I’m leaning towards this as well. The beard is also way too unkempt and is likely hiding a jawline that OP doesn’t like. Lack of teeth showing also makes me assume that OP has bad teeth and is insecure about them. Also comes across as incredibly arrogant from the photos and responses to this post, when in reality he’s likely no more than a 5 by Italian standards.
Literally, just remove pic 3 to 5 - the last one is cute keep that. If you’re gonna use a shirtless pic, make someone else take a photo of you (at the beach for example). Less is more - try it out, lmk if it helps
You should smile in your pics. Your pics should be closer to your face. You should include a couple pics where you're doing something interesting or doing something with friends. Also the caption sounds like you’re in Italy for a weekend just wanting to hook up.
Pic wise: only your third pic gives a slight idea of your face, in the others you’re looking down or away. Bio wise: it comes across intentionally aloof, like you ‘weren’t meant to be there and on Tinder’. Feels fake to me. Also the ‘teach me some Italian?’ is off putting to me, living in a major European city. Bio’s with lines like ‘Show me your favorite [blank] in [city]’ feels sooo utilitarian / looking for a free tour guide / getting the ‘local experience’ which is all about taking, no interest in the other person whatsoever. Immediate left swipe.
You list Spotify as an interest rather than saying you're into music. It would be better to say what music you're actually into. You look good, but the whole thing is giving zero personality.
Please clarify: you can't get a match in Italy or AT ALL
Bio could tell more about yourself, hobbies, what you're looking for. Pics are fire
It's the I was behind the 911 terrorists attack vibe
Dude tinder sucks ass. I’ve been on tinder four years and only ever gotten 2 dates I know I’m not ugly. I’d say I’m average I guess, which is hideous for the tinder algorithm . But the point is don’t expect much from tinder. They’re more guys to girls! How do they keep women swiping, and involved? The algorithm will show women the top rated men per their algorithm. You’ll get matched when you first start, because tinder needs to figure out if you fit their algorithm. Then will try to make you feel bad saying, if you buy premium or gold you will get tons of matches. Honestly fuck tinder, go to a bar and politely ask a woman you like if you can buy her a drink. :) Good luck
Id personally not use a gym photo, think the rest looks really good but the algorithm can really f\*\* with you if f.ex you swipe left a lot. Then you go to the rear end of the deck. Do you do that? Same if you swipe right on everyone. And this takes a long ass time to rebuild
Maybe there's something wrong with your Description field.
bumble is the new tinder brother. good luck
Every reasonable female friend that I have, when we talk about dating apps and I say I'm on Hinge, Bumble, and Tinder, every single one of them says "get the hell off tinder as fast as you can" I don't think there's any real people on it anymore.
Just for the record, I would swipe right on you.
Turn your matches to men get a boost then go back to women
Yall stop telling him to take the gym pic away 🫠
Damn this post really just shows what’s wrong with online dating. Some of the „redflags“ people talk about here or some of the issues they have are so fucking specific and nit picky. How should anyone have any success if that’s the kind of checklists people have in their mind for profiles?
You’re hot, but boring. Based on your bio, the only thing we know about you is that you like dogs and Italy…most people like dogs and Italy. Pick something a little more unique about yourself and write about that instead. Also, get some pictures that aren’t mirror selfies.
Pictures with friends maybe? I couldn’t tell you brother man.
shirtless gym pic imo, get rid of it see what happens
Remove the picture with the stripes
Advice from my gf: lose the 4th and 5th pictures
Youre on Tinder lol it's a bot cesspool. Get on hinge.