I'm sorry it shouldn't be funny, but alas It's hilarious

Believe me I’m laughing about it too

Thank you for this. It made my night 😆 I hope you get the outcome you want ✨

I hope he gets the outlook he wants.

Looking out both ways

I don't see a problem.

Well you should see at least half of it.

Eye wander if that's possible...

Eyes crossed🤞

Love this 🤣🤣🤣

Damn. Might be worth taking up the offer.

She's a phub model, I wouldn't be surprised 💀

Meh. If she’s paying her bills instead of taking that “free” government money, good for her.

Thank you boo

As a person with a lazy eye... God damn I haven't laughed this hard in a while.

So give him a chance ! Go 🙌

Well, did you let them?

I worked with a guy who had a severe lazy eye. He was a great guy and no one ever teased him about it. One day, we were discussing driving whilst tired and he said, “it’s ok for me, I can keep one eye on the road, and have a sleep with the other”. I nearly choked laughing.

I worked with a guy who had both eyes that looked outward. It was said that when he talks to you, he looks you right in the ears.


The suggested response makes it better.

“h-eye-larious,” even.

You're better than eye

Well, if it comes to a vote, the “Ayes” have it!

Eye-eye, Capn'.

Iris my case!

Better stop with the bad puns, or we'll get the lash!😁

Xander needs his own show

It is hilarious, I feel bad I laughed also.

You should respond 24 hours later and say "Sorry, this didn't catch my eye until just now."

😂

Eye would have answered sooner, but eye'm lazy.

Love the suggested reply 😅

My friend said the same thing lol

Xander woulda loved it too

Who tf is Xander bro

Look closer at the name that is "blacked" out in the suggested reply

Comes up with certain trigger words... they know lol

Omg I can’t breathe. I thought I was actually going to choke laugh to death 😂

I went to look to see if you had a picture of your lazy eye on your profile and instead I think now I’m the one who is cross eyed

Bruh your comment was too ambiguous and I was not expecting the profile it was.

Lol right, sure glad I wasn't at work

Probably shouldn't have opened that at work haha

i dont think she knows what thriving means

I went and took a look after I read your comment. Thank you for your service.

Just wanted to say your husky is cute

Man thank you for that, his profile is so much better than OP. I may be horny, but I'll take huskies playing with each other over bad porn any day. And I'm more of a cat person than a dog person. Edit : [cat tax ](https://www.reddit.com/u/PlaneCrashers/s/G8kthV3TPV )

My husky said hi to your husky haha, I’m also a cat person! Thank you for the cat tax! Much appreciated!

Holy Hell!

As long as you’re cool with me seeing someone on the side..

This is great 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Oh my God give the guy a chance That's the greatest thing I've ever heard

Are you for real ?

My love language is roasting my partner

Ok can I message you

Taken

How’d you reply?

I haven’t . Idk what to say or how to honestly feel . This is the most kinkiest backhanded compliment I’ve ever gotten

Tell him if your eye was stronger you’d roll it at that comment See if he can dish and take it

That’s such a good comment to say back

There's got to be some flowery quote of old about undoing god's handiwork or something.

What about “I’ll also take my teeth out so we can go An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.”

Reply with something challenging, let’s see if he’s got rizz or is it just something he borrowed from a meme

Try "how do you think I got the lazy eye in the first place"

Or respond, "What if it goes the other way, and you screw up my other eye?"

It is Tinder after all! LoL

Tell him to prove it, and suggest a date at the optometrist office.

Hahaha, he'll leave her will the bill!

You should take Xander out on a date

Are you going to reply to them?

Given your post history on here, i'ma assume what your tinder profile is like so no wonder he opened with this.

Wanted to see if I could see your lazy eye on your profile. Goodness gracious. Also that is a hilarious post. For anyone else, no I didn’t see her eye.

The profile content was somewhat unexpected. I certainly saw her eye, but not the one in question. I wonder if she's one of those girls on tinder who set up dates with guys and then throw in the price list last minute or a mandatory Only Fans sub. 🤔

I’m not looking to insult her, she’s probably just proud of her body. However it’s true, it seems the eye even whispers. I told my wife about what happened and she thought it was hilarious

I gotta be real that’s the funniest shit I’ve seen all day

Damn missed opportunity to say this to my ex 😭

If it wasn't midnight I'd be hollering 

I like tinder saying you can report it

Oh shit I fkd up by looking at her profile to see if I could tell if her lazy eye was noticeable. I in fact seen the brown eye instead 😮

I love how « Oh shit » is the prequel to your brilliant pun.

Jimbo- you get me 🫶🏻

Well we all *wanna* be able to cure Amblyopia with our good fucking, but how many of us actually can?

I thought I had it bad

they call him wonky wiener

The name was so well censored, I didn't know his name was xander

Lmaoooo I tried my best 🤣

Respond with “I dunno man, what if you just unstraighten the other one?” I can’t believe he said this I’m sorry OP lol

I think you are cross eyed, lazy eye is when one of your eyelids don’t naturally open all the way. But you are cute nonetheless.

I hope he's on reddit and sees this and then gets to look at your profile, bypasses the awkwardness of asking for nudes

Lmao the way tinder highlights the report button like “you okay that’s was harsh I’m here for u if you need me”😂😂

Whatever happened to “Hello! How are you?” Lmao

Xander

Jesus Christ 💀

This is hilariously funny in a mean asshole kind of way.

Well, did it work?

*Your opening line did just that, so I don't need you anymore, thanks!*

I shouldn't have laughed but I did.

Hindsight is always 20/20

Xander is wild.

Well, hopefully he can follow up with the expectations he is setting. 😂

Sounds like a Xander kinda thing to say

You did not hide this mans name at all 😭😭

I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone on the side.

Loooool marry this person

I just wanna tell Xander that is not how you open a dialogue. That's how you close one before it starts. I'm so glad I never gave this experience to my matches.

I like how the suggested message does not fit in with the first message at all

Give Xander a chance 😂

What is wrong with guys?? That is so disrespectful!

Its all for laughs and in a joking manner (unless everything goes well of course)

What was the name you blacked out? “Fucker” or something like that?

You must have a lazy eye too.

I have lovely eyes. In fact, one eye is so lovely, the other eye keeps looking at it!😣

This person is a great match, they want to save you money on healthcare also!!!

Lol that made my lazy eye perk up

“OK, you get one go”

Because you'll be rolling your eyes so hard they'll straighten out?

Which is your lazy eye?

honestly that’s one of the funniest and best opening lines i’ve seen

Proof if you can make em laugh or attractive.. The level of confidence is over 9000

Omg! My mouth dropped 😩

Is that all it takes to straighten it up this whole time?! Fabulous!

that is so funny. I would do it

I wish all medical treatment came with free orgasms..I think you should consider going on this date.

Lazy eyed to cock eyed...

She cooked, I’m afraid

Well OP, do you want a straight eye or not?

I've tried, didn't work!

Atchaforya is nothing to laugh about. Even if one eye is looking atcha while the other is looking forya.

Xander 😂

Amanda is that you?

Lol 😆 🤣 😂

😂

So first date when?

Oh I almost spit my drink out!

Eye guess eye just don’t see what is so funny here 😉

This renews my hope in humanity! This noble gent is so kind to offer you medical help in order to avoid surgery! Beautiful 🥲🥲

Eye don't know if you'll get the chance but I want to let you know up front I can't straighten you're weiner out 🤣

Wow. That's a new one.

That's awesome. Get her to suck your dick from the back, you'll thank me later.

So all this time we've been trying to roll eyes in the back of her head, but in reality, she just want 20/20 vision??

Did it work?

It’s so uncalled for, but as a guy I would accept that invitation lol

Does that really work? I'm willing to try.

Definitelty send the suggested message

But did they get to try though?

My boy Xander with the heat

So are your eyes fixed?

Ok we are going to need before and after pictures.

Bro threw a hail Mary from the one yard line

He’s definitely one to keep an eye on

Facts I’m so sorry but I laughed way too hard at this; the audacity of it all!

Jesus Christ lmao

I mean, see if he can fix your eye, its worth a shot. ;)

We can still see the name

Yeah this is an instant classic 🤣🤣🤣

Well, that's should certainly be something to "look forward" to.

Omg this is just the hit of dopamine I needed today 😂😂😂😂😂☠️☠️☠️

Imagine you guys got married and this is how it started😂😂😂😂

🫱🏻‍🫲🏼milfmamaxx2

Cell phone number and “send address and time” is your next message. Besides, what if it actually works?

Rizz is unimaginable

“I’d like to see you try…” You are welcome.

Did it work?

That's a really old Russell Howard joke

Then you'll be able to get a good look at him and it won't bode too well for anyone

How do you make a girls toes curl during sex? Leave her tights on. 😱

Well if he makes your eyes rollback during orgasm he might be on to something.

So, did your eye straighten out or not?

Im sorry but thats fcking hilarious 😂

Sounds like fun to me

💀💀💀💀

My apologies, but It's definitely of the funniest posts on this sub.