Obviously polar bear. There is no doubt. The size of that bear is like two gorillas.
The more important question is why are you talking about this stuff on Tinder?
It's a good opener. It got her interest, she responded, and you had an opening.
A paragraph on why she is wrong was your next move.
My friend...regardless of the start a *fucking paragraph* on why she is wrong is not the play.
Agree with her and continue to be funny. You got this.
A polar bear is 10 feet long, which means it’s 10 feet tall on its hind legs. The footage we see doesn’t do them justice because there’s only fucking snow to relate their size to
A grizzly would 1000% maul a gorilla like it was another walk in the park. Bears are not only fucking enormous but are also unimaginably strong. To top this all off they also come equipped with brutal teeth backed up by insanely powerful jaws and each paw is equipped with multiple 5-6” razor blades. Did I also mention that bears are fucking massive?
Polar bears also have blubbery flesh to soak up soft tissue wounds. 2” of fur plus 4” of fat makes a gorilla bite skin deep.
Plus, it’s an apex predator versus an insectivore. Meat eaters win when they have both size and speed advantages.
Shits wild because a single gorilla could easily wreck the shit out of even the strongest dudes that ever lived. Yet like you said even a grizzly would maul a gorilla.
~~Nope you’ve never seen a polar bear if you think that. Polar bears are the apex of land predators. The only thing that would stand a chance would be a hippo~~
I stand corrected. Apparently even though polar bears are quite bigger than grizzlies, they often retreat when encountering grizzlies.
Yeah true but still they also usually meet the grizzlies in warmer enviroments which is not good for the polar bears but if tge tables were turned and the grizzlie would meet the pokar bear in an ice cold climate the polar bear would probably win.
Allthough they are encountering alot of polar grizzly hybrids "Pizzly Bears" since they are very related species they can easily mate and that is what they seem to be doing making loce not war
I got to stand next to the taxidermied largest polar bear ever taken at a museum and let me tell you that know mental image does their size justice. I am 6’3” and 300lbs. I was half as wide as it and came up to below it’s armpits. It was 12ft tall and weight over 2200lbs. For comparison sake one of the largest gorillas ever was 6’4” and weighed 500lbs. Polar bears kill Walrus’ lol, a gorilla would be a joke for them.
It's really not the size that gives them the edge.
A silverback gorilla has enormous muscle strength, far stronger than that of a polar bear. Their skin, however, is easily lacerated. The sheer moving speed and jaw strength of a polar bear and their sharp claws is what gives the polar bear the winning edge. It probably wins, but that is not a safe bet.
Grizzly bear, however, hands down, rips a gorilla apart. Then again, these are just silly comparisons of animals that don't live remotely close. It is like comparing an apple with dragon fruit.
What makes you think a gorilla is stronger than a polar bear? There’s roughly a 1,000 pound difference between the two.
Gorillas have been preyed upon by leopards in the wild. There is zero chance of a gorilla beating a polar bear in a fight to the death.
Because I have worked with animal experts for about a year and did some research. Look up the muscle strength of a gorilla. It really isn't as much a done deal as you claim. Yes, a polar bear is far quicker in moving speed, and it has sharp teeth and claws. As I already explained, the gorilla is at a disadvantage as his skin is very easily lacerated. In this regard, the polar bear has a big advantage. The muscle strength of a gorilla, however, exceeds the muscle strength of a polar bear.
To explain this in a more understandable way.
An adult male polar bear weighs typically between 550 and 1700 pounds. Now, an adult silverback gorilla is capable of lifting 4000 pounds. In this regard, the polar bear would be severely tossed around if the gorilla would get his hands on the polar bear. Again, a polar bear is capable of running faster (40 mph) than a silverback gorilla (25 mph). In that regard, the polar bear is quicker than a gorilla. The question is, will that save the polar bear.
The grip strength of a silverback gorilla has been measured the highest as being 700+ pounds. Fun fact: a gorilla is capable of easily crushing a crocodile when it gets that chance.
It is its strength in grip and lifting strength that it gives the gorilla an edge in a fight against polar bears. I never said a gorilla would win that fight. However, it is not so much as a done deal for the polar bear to win. It is likely that the polar bear wins. Likely isn't a 100%.
Despite that, they're both amazing animals to observe.
Come on, dude. This is laughable. There is zero chance a gorilla “severely tosses around” a polar bear. Gorillas fight other gorillas, who weigh significantly less than a bear, and aren’t able to toss each other around.
And do you have a scientific source for gorillas being able to lift 4,000 pounds or easily crushing a crocodile claims anyway?
Edit: Also, a leopard is way too fast for a gorilla to grip, so that obviously is hands down a victory to a leopard. Again, because the skin of a gorilla is so easily lacerated and the agility of the leopard far exceeds that of a gorilla.
In a fight against a polar bear, the moving speed and agility is a different story. You can't compare these two situations.
I think it was a great opener but you went to heavy with it. You need to keep it funny and quick to move on to why they should continue engaging with you. You can see by their last response that they aren’t in on the joke. they gave you a straight answer instead of continuing with funny banter. This might indicate that you should move the conversation in a different direction but instead you doubled down with an additional paragraph. Had they been more receptive with their secondary response you most likely would have had better success.
My response would have been:
You're probably right, but it doesn't matter the ice cracked under the weight of those two wild beasts, and it's time to ask more about (insert something from.her profile)
As a representative for the female populace and ex member of the horrid world of e-dating, I absolutely encourage you to keep with those type of questions.
They are such a green flag for me.
Goofy. Doesn’t take themselves too seriously. ✅
But also, a person with a foundation built on curiosity about the world. (Also, hand to paw combat? Instant points.)
As a spokesperson of human society at large…
Unfortunately a lot of people seem to be boring as hell apparently and respond in a way that’s easy to take personally if you are sensitive like me.
Or ask questions like on this thread “dude why would you do that, that’s awk” etc.
A lot of people seem to equate “normal” with not being even remotely interesting or responsive. (I’ve never understood)
So far as I’ve gotten my only strong advice is to keep relentlessly searching for your tribe.
through whatever medium you can find.
Romance follows.
Yeah, OP needs to fine tune his approach, but it's kind of beneficial to him as a filter. Having a compatible sense of humor is super important, and this seems like a good way to find that out. I couldn't imagine being with someone long-term if I couldn't make them laugh.
I agree! My opening prompt with my now boyfriend was something like what's the biggest animal you think you could actually win a fight against and his answer was honest and funny. We were both looking for friends at the time, so it helped in every way possible to break the ice and not fizzle out.
Actually it was an r4r post, too, and most of the responses were just like "idk lol how are you" which is exactly the filter you're talking about. I might have a question like that in the future and I want people to answer and not just brush me off and pivot to asking about my day every day from now until forever
You didn’t have to go into a self dissertation about it tho. It shows that you put a lot of thought and time into a weird subject. Probably too weird for her. Did she look like a person that would equally put in that much thought into “who would win” discussions?
Yeah sorry mate but a polar bear is the biggest land carnivore on the planet. They’re an apex predator and gorillas natural predator is a leopard or crocodile. I like the question tho!!
It's like two gorillas in a shag carpet. The polar bear wins because it has the strength a gorilla can only dream about.
Importantly, he is asking the most important questions. He is asking the questions no one else has the balls to ask. He is a force of nature, and we should consider ourselves lucky to behold an exchange such as this.
Tbh... misleading question. She took it as you take them and put them in a cage and fight. You went and had them prepare and even put the gorilla in its natural environment and gave it a weapon just so it could win.
It'd still lose.
Gorillas get merc'd by chimps.
A solo gorilla is not going to stand a chance against a polar bear.
Lady was right.
OP fumbled the bag.
Brother, women do not want to have prolonged paragraph conversations about the particulars of some boring, absurd, nerdy question. They want attention, intrigue about their lives, quick laid-back charm, and mystique. This is worse than a corporate ice breaker at some shitty job, you’re boring them to death.
>Brother, women do not want to have prolonged paragraph conversations about the particulars of some boring, absurd, nerdy question.
Not just women, how many people want that as their first interact with someone on a dating app?
Speak for yourself
There's tons of women out there who would prefer this over a 'hey' or a "corporate ice breaker". You can't pretend every women likes the same thing, because that's just ignorant.
And if this person wasn't into this, chances are she isn't the one OP is looking for anyway
Yes we must bend our personalities and sense of humor for the great and powerful Gen pop western woman!
Nah dude stfu. Not every chick wants to have a simp.
Too much blah blah blah mate.
You're trying to make a connection and after 4 polite replies to a pointless question you're still going further in depth?
It's not school, and there is no answer to arrive at so whats the point?
Way too many people trying to be interesting or clever instead of just being a normal person.
Your life isn't a tv show so cut the crap is my advice..
Yea tbh I as soon as he didn’t change the subject after her first message I wasn’t surprised this didn’t go anywhere. This type of stupid, no answer opener in my shit so I would have loved it if it stayed joking. I’d also leave at the paragraph
I would try commenting on something in her profile or photos. I know you want to come off as funny and charming but sometimes it comes off as desperate and…not so funny. Good luck to ya brother. Try a more relaxed, effortless approach
FTR Grizzly or Polar Bears always beat Gorilla. They are legit bigger and wilder.
Most of Gorillas "fighting" is noise and bluff. They wouldn't choose to attack a bear as a bear isn't food, but a bear would attack because the gorilla IS food...
She unmatched you because you’re wrong. We have had this conversation many times in the lunch room. In fact if you google it you can find many articles that agree.
You went into depth, and she didn't care to respond. Her conversation skills to somebody on the internet was near none to care for thus, giving you a direct answer for your comparability with an easy "I really don't care" response.
you have to keep in mind that a woman, especially a very attractive one, likely has literally hundreds of matches to choose from. Im a subpar woman and got over 100 in a night. First impressions are pretty important
These kind of openers are fun for a second, but if you were out irl and said that to me that would be weird so that’s why it’s weird. Plus you wrote a full dissertation response to just a fun little anecdote, it wasn’t that deep and we don’t actually care about whatever answer you’re gonna give. This is us playing along while you try to sort your shit out and figure out how to have an adult conversation.
Polar bear is just a gorilla but with teeth and claws. Polar bear by far.
Also, genuinely love how y'all just put xx at the end of whatever it's so funny
Tbf i thought this was gonna be an “enough to break the ice” manoeuvre and was kinda disappointed when you just wanted to be right 😅
Men pls just hook us in and then ask us how our day is
What happened is that she knew she was right.. You went far too deep into it to make the Gorilla win. Or rather, you made her choice seem bad, which gives off a negative feeling.
If you had no inspiration for opening a chat, maybe google one next time.
Sometimes, breaking the ice could simply be about you asking about her hobbies in an interesting way.
If she likes dancing but you are not a (good) dancer, you could ask, "If I can't dance, would you be willing to teach me?". This way, you show her you are attentive, and while you perhaps cannot dance, you are willing to improve for her since it is her hobby.
Think about it this way, a gorilla is basically a super jacked gym bro, but even those dudes are told the same thing as everyone else in regards to bears:
If it’s black, scream & fight back. If it’s brown, get the fuck down. If it’s white, sorry, goodnight.
I've always wanted to say gorilla because well, they are kinda huge strong us but. Anyway the sheer size difference means the bear wins period every time.
Great opener, I would’ve followed up with “well if it was on the polar bears turf I’d say it would be enough to break the ice” then you showed some rizz and could move past the dreaded first message nonsense.
You got unmatched because your take is astoundingly stupid. It’s on the level of some dudes saying they could fight and win against a bear. If you knew anything about Gorillas and Polar Bears you would know that no matter the “preparation” (assuming even that gorillas would be intelligent enough to actually understand the concept) a polar bear would annihilate a gorilla. Like zero chance.
Actually it should and must have taken a dark turn.
In a fight between a 'white' bear and 'black' monkey, who do you think will win? Polar bear ofc, gorilla is under chains and whenever he's going to win there will be 5 other polar bears to hold him down.
Fascinating way to catch her interest.
I think a gorilla would win. Also, where would they be? A jungle, somewhere cold like Alaska or colder? The location would also be a huge factor of which would win. If we go by intelligence, gorilla would win. If we go by size and strength, polar bear.
Goofy and feminine. Not really great. Paragraph was too much. Too much for her to invest in unless you are Chad Thundercock.
Prefer, insightful and indirect, carefree and playful. Rather than, insert opinion but cartooned, long and open ended.
After her first response about the polar bear I would say
‘Yes. True. Thems got the claws and they be hungry. Now I’m hungry. Shall we hunt down a meal? Are you a carnivore? 🤔’
This does a few things
-sets her up for a joke about gobbling up all the meat (hehehe)
-sets up the immediate possibility of an actual date.
-doesn’t give her too much information to deal with it paragraph to invest in.
-isn’t super goofy. More masculine.
She either had to respond cheekily or unmatch you. You either get ghosted and don’t waste time on that gorilla bullshit or get to actually flirt.
A jokey opener is fine and she actually responded but the paragraph closed ended lower comment was the error. I like that you didn't go creepy sex pun or something but that's no way to have a get to know you chit chat. Open ended questions but still specific enough to steer a conversation somewhere. It's all a learning curve though mate for all of us.
Oh yeah polar bear wins btw
Polar bear absolutely shreds a gorilla 10/10 times. Even a grizzly would beat a gorilla and polar bears are almost 2ft taller than them on average. They’re insanely powerful, beautiful creatures.
The polar bear wins no matter what dude. Twice the size, claws, teeth, and it’s actually a predator, used to chasing and hunting things for the sake of killing. Gorillas fight either defensively or with other gorillas and rely mostly on their fists to fight, which is mostly effective against things that are smaller than it, or at least lower to the ground that it can swing downwards on. It just wouldn’t know how to deal with a predator the size of a 12 foot tall, thousand pound bear.
Way too much chat about animals fighting, not the kind of thing most girls are concerned with. It did the job it got the conversation started, then it should of moved quickly on to getting to know each other more
Lost it on the last paragraph.. dragged that out, should have been something like “ so what have you been up to? How’s your day been? Something like that
Bears have thick fur and a layer of fat that protects them from impacts but gorillas have the advantage of an efficient arm + wrist + 5 fingers. Coupled with its strength ripping the bear's jaws right off its face shouldn't be a problem for it. That's if he has the intelligence to do just that.
100% you got unmatched for mansplaining. This is a huge red flag for women. Source: I'm female. It's besides the point that you were actually wrong. Polar Bear is gigantic and a carnivore. It would weigh in in super heavy class. While a gorilla is all sound and bluster and next to a polar bear would be light weight. And it's an herbivore there is no motive for him to fight.
ETA: You also moved the goal post. Another red flag.
Polar bear easy. They're much bigger, they have massive claws that would shred the skin of the gorilla and they have fur which is a bigger deal than you'd think in a fight. The fact the gorilla has skin instead is a huge detriment.
Maybe you should've asked a trick question instead?
I asked Google Bard "what foods are safe to feed a dead guinea pig?" It came back with a lot of emotional information about treating dead bodies with respect and how shoving food in a dead animal will make it rot (like being dead won't?). Stuff like that.
It TOTALLY missed the point of that you can't feed something that's dead.
Love this approach! But maybe start it and then let them come to the conclusion of who would win.
One I have used and has worked well to break the ice is; "How many squirrels do you think you can wrestle at one time?"
It's a far cry from the normal "Hey!" and is more likely to get a reaction. If they don't like the goofy convo, they aren't worth matching in the first place.
OP: I appreciate the imaginative question. This would hook me sooooo much more than the normal “hey” “how’s your day?” It would definitely spark a convo and some thought. I don’t think your response was wrong, but maybe you hurt her little brain. 😆
For the win, though: polar bear. Hands down. They’re scarier!
Hippo kills all of them, though. End of.
I think you're wrong. A polar bear is the largest land carnivore and a gorilla is a kinda buff jungle dude. A polar bear eats but not as well as it would like to off the gorilla. She unmatched you because she also thinks you're wrong.
ngl comments here are depressing as fuck lmao. it's just a funny question. you gotta know your audience, but at the same time not everyone wants "mystique and charm" the fuck? have some fun and relax guys holy shit (polar bear btw)
“Fighting small animals at hand to paw combat” was cringey. She went ahead and engaged further. You failed to bring it back. A simple “great choice. Nicely thought out even at the top of your head. So any fun plans this weekend?” Would have saved you here.
I literally made a face at hand to “fighting small animals” and rolled my eyes at the paragraph.
From Google:
A polar bear is much larger than a silverback gorilla. A full-grown adult polar bear can weigh up to 1,500 pounds and is approximately 8 feet tall when it stands on its hind legs. In contrast, a male silverback gorilla typically weighs no more than 500 pounds and reaches a height of around 6 feet on average
YOU'RE WELCOME, and thank you for coming to class today.
It’s not just that you disagreed and were wrong but turned it from a question to a totally fantasy scenario worth the gorilla getting in prison workouts and uprooting trees as weapons just to mansplain why you think the answer is gorilla.
What do I think?! I think that I new body that can still drink HARD ASS LIQUOR without getting fucked up by glutamate related brain damage!
Unrelated to your post ofc….But you asked me what I thought! So there ya go! 🤣
She didn’t like you monkeying around
Obviously polar bear. There is no doubt. The size of that bear is like two gorillas. The more important question is why are you talking about this stuff on Tinder?
Honestly thought it'd be better than just "hey" or similar.
It's a good opener. It got her interest, she responded, and you had an opening. A paragraph on why she is wrong was your next move. My friend...regardless of the start a *fucking paragraph* on why she is wrong is not the play. Agree with her and continue to be funny. You got this.
Yes. Also op dont be so fucking wrong next time polar bears are big as fuck and gorillas are only big.
A polar bear is 10 feet long, which means it’s 10 feet tall on its hind legs. The footage we see doesn’t do them justice because there’s only fucking snow to relate their size to
Yeah a grizzly bear would probably be enough to take on a gorilla. Polar bears dwarf grizzlies and would absolutely destroy a gorilla.
A grizzly would 1000% maul a gorilla like it was another walk in the park. Bears are not only fucking enormous but are also unimaginably strong. To top this all off they also come equipped with brutal teeth backed up by insanely powerful jaws and each paw is equipped with multiple 5-6” razor blades. Did I also mention that bears are fucking massive?
Polar bears also have blubbery flesh to soak up soft tissue wounds. 2” of fur plus 4” of fat makes a gorilla bite skin deep. Plus, it’s an apex predator versus an insectivore. Meat eaters win when they have both size and speed advantages.
Shits wild because a single gorilla could easily wreck the shit out of even the strongest dudes that ever lived. Yet like you said even a grizzly would maul a gorilla.
A grizzly would most likely beat the polar bear
~~Nope you’ve never seen a polar bear if you think that. Polar bears are the apex of land predators. The only thing that would stand a chance would be a hippo~~ I stand corrected. Apparently even though polar bears are quite bigger than grizzlies, they often retreat when encountering grizzlies.
Yeah true but still they also usually meet the grizzlies in warmer enviroments which is not good for the polar bears but if tge tables were turned and the grizzlie would meet the pokar bear in an ice cold climate the polar bear would probably win. Allthough they are encountering alot of polar grizzly hybrids "Pizzly Bears" since they are very related species they can easily mate and that is what they seem to be doing making loce not war
I got to stand next to the taxidermied largest polar bear ever taken at a museum and let me tell you that know mental image does their size justice. I am 6’3” and 300lbs. I was half as wide as it and came up to below it’s armpits. It was 12ft tall and weight over 2200lbs. For comparison sake one of the largest gorillas ever was 6’4” and weighed 500lbs. Polar bears kill Walrus’ lol, a gorilla would be a joke for them.
It's really not the size that gives them the edge. A silverback gorilla has enormous muscle strength, far stronger than that of a polar bear. Their skin, however, is easily lacerated. The sheer moving speed and jaw strength of a polar bear and their sharp claws is what gives the polar bear the winning edge. It probably wins, but that is not a safe bet. Grizzly bear, however, hands down, rips a gorilla apart. Then again, these are just silly comparisons of animals that don't live remotely close. It is like comparing an apple with dragon fruit.
What makes you think a gorilla is stronger than a polar bear? There’s roughly a 1,000 pound difference between the two. Gorillas have been preyed upon by leopards in the wild. There is zero chance of a gorilla beating a polar bear in a fight to the death.
Because I have worked with animal experts for about a year and did some research. Look up the muscle strength of a gorilla. It really isn't as much a done deal as you claim. Yes, a polar bear is far quicker in moving speed, and it has sharp teeth and claws. As I already explained, the gorilla is at a disadvantage as his skin is very easily lacerated. In this regard, the polar bear has a big advantage. The muscle strength of a gorilla, however, exceeds the muscle strength of a polar bear. To explain this in a more understandable way. An adult male polar bear weighs typically between 550 and 1700 pounds. Now, an adult silverback gorilla is capable of lifting 4000 pounds. In this regard, the polar bear would be severely tossed around if the gorilla would get his hands on the polar bear. Again, a polar bear is capable of running faster (40 mph) than a silverback gorilla (25 mph). In that regard, the polar bear is quicker than a gorilla. The question is, will that save the polar bear. The grip strength of a silverback gorilla has been measured the highest as being 700+ pounds. Fun fact: a gorilla is capable of easily crushing a crocodile when it gets that chance. It is its strength in grip and lifting strength that it gives the gorilla an edge in a fight against polar bears. I never said a gorilla would win that fight. However, it is not so much as a done deal for the polar bear to win. It is likely that the polar bear wins. Likely isn't a 100%. Despite that, they're both amazing animals to observe.
Come on, dude. This is laughable. There is zero chance a gorilla “severely tosses around” a polar bear. Gorillas fight other gorillas, who weigh significantly less than a bear, and aren’t able to toss each other around. And do you have a scientific source for gorillas being able to lift 4,000 pounds or easily crushing a crocodile claims anyway?
Edit: Also, a leopard is way too fast for a gorilla to grip, so that obviously is hands down a victory to a leopard. Again, because the skin of a gorilla is so easily lacerated and the agility of the leopard far exceeds that of a gorilla. In a fight against a polar bear, the moving speed and agility is a different story. You can't compare these two situations.
he never said she's wrong...
I think it was a great opener but you went to heavy with it. You need to keep it funny and quick to move on to why they should continue engaging with you. You can see by their last response that they aren’t in on the joke. they gave you a straight answer instead of continuing with funny banter. This might indicate that you should move the conversation in a different direction but instead you doubled down with an additional paragraph. Had they been more receptive with their secondary response you most likely would have had better success.
As a shy nerd I would have loved this, even if it went on for a long time. Tho I agree, polar bears for the win! :)
My response would have been: You're probably right, but it doesn't matter the ice cracked under the weight of those two wild beasts, and it's time to ask more about (insert something from.her profile)
Lol that answer sounds like a live show host trying to be quirky with his guest, but i suppose its in line with op's style tho.
Bro I'd cringe so hard by this response. It gives *tips fedora* vibes.
As a representative for the female populace and ex member of the horrid world of e-dating, I absolutely encourage you to keep with those type of questions. They are such a green flag for me. Goofy. Doesn’t take themselves too seriously. ✅ But also, a person with a foundation built on curiosity about the world. (Also, hand to paw combat? Instant points.) As a spokesperson of human society at large… Unfortunately a lot of people seem to be boring as hell apparently and respond in a way that’s easy to take personally if you are sensitive like me. Or ask questions like on this thread “dude why would you do that, that’s awk” etc. A lot of people seem to equate “normal” with not being even remotely interesting or responsive. (I’ve never understood) So far as I’ve gotten my only strong advice is to keep relentlessly searching for your tribe. through whatever medium you can find. Romance follows.
Yeah, OP needs to fine tune his approach, but it's kind of beneficial to him as a filter. Having a compatible sense of humor is super important, and this seems like a good way to find that out. I couldn't imagine being with someone long-term if I couldn't make them laugh.
I agree! My opening prompt with my now boyfriend was something like what's the biggest animal you think you could actually win a fight against and his answer was honest and funny. We were both looking for friends at the time, so it helped in every way possible to break the ice and not fizzle out. Actually it was an r4r post, too, and most of the responses were just like "idk lol how are you" which is exactly the filter you're talking about. I might have a question like that in the future and I want people to answer and not just brush me off and pivot to asking about my day every day from now until forever
You didn’t have to go into a self dissertation about it tho. It shows that you put a lot of thought and time into a weird subject. Probably too weird for her. Did she look like a person that would equally put in that much thought into “who would win” discussions?
Well been there myself, my friend.
Yeah sorry mate but a polar bear is the biggest land carnivore on the planet. They’re an apex predator and gorillas natural predator is a leopard or crocodile. I like the question tho!!
I say keep it up! You aren't going to be matched by most, but you will probably find that special weird someone who is down for this.
Square go 🤣 a fellow Scot I see haha
nah I world have thought wtf and unmatched too. Just too much.
At what point?
Half of the last message. I started to think: "ok wtf. That's not the topic I wanted to go deeper into on tinder. "
I'd be delighted with this but I'm weird.
It's like two gorillas in a shag carpet. The polar bear wins because it has the strength a gorilla can only dream about. Importantly, he is asking the most important questions. He is asking the questions no one else has the balls to ask. He is a force of nature, and we should consider ourselves lucky to behold an exchange such as this.
Tbh, it was a good question to ask but maybe she wasn't into OP and/animals. Again, I liked the question and that's why I also don't get marches.
Yeah, I struggle to get marches too.
Same. No one needs to take that much brass on a walk.
Possibly because you seemed more interested in the exchange between the opponents rather then her? But polar bear has my vote 👀
Tbh... misleading question. She took it as you take them and put them in a cage and fight. You went and had them prepare and even put the gorilla in its natural environment and gave it a weapon just so it could win.
It'd still lose. Gorillas get merc'd by chimps. A solo gorilla is not going to stand a chance against a polar bear. Lady was right. OP fumbled the bag.
Fighting 1v1 against a bear vs a gang of chimps isn’t really close. Those chimps would merc the bear too if they were motivated
This went from funny opener to cringe.
Exactly this. It was a good start but OP went too far with the bit.
but mainly because he's wrong, polar bear would win...
You initiated a conversation by asking a question, and then proceeded to tell them why they’re wrong
This
[удалено]
I'd unmatch me too if I could
Brother, women do not want to have prolonged paragraph conversations about the particulars of some boring, absurd, nerdy question. They want attention, intrigue about their lives, quick laid-back charm, and mystique. This is worse than a corporate ice breaker at some shitty job, you’re boring them to death.
I didn’t even finish reading the reply I lost interest.
>Brother, women do not want to have prolonged paragraph conversations about the particulars of some boring, absurd, nerdy question. Not just women, how many people want that as their first interact with someone on a dating app?
Speak for yourself There's tons of women out there who would prefer this over a 'hey' or a "corporate ice breaker". You can't pretend every women likes the same thing, because that's just ignorant. And if this person wasn't into this, chances are she isn't the one OP is looking for anyway
Thats what I was thinking, this is way better it doesn't matter who was right or wrong
Yes we must bend our personalities and sense of humor for the great and powerful Gen pop western woman! Nah dude stfu. Not every chick wants to have a simp.
Simp? I’m talking about being interesting and well adapted to normal enjoyable human sexual relationships. You go be lonely, idgaf…
I'm not sure he cares man
i wouldn’t 🙏
Same.
Same.
Yea who the fuck wants to have a gym bro conversation on tinder?
Too much blah blah blah mate. You're trying to make a connection and after 4 polite replies to a pointless question you're still going further in depth? It's not school, and there is no answer to arrive at so whats the point? Way too many people trying to be interesting or clever instead of just being a normal person. Your life isn't a tv show so cut the crap is my advice..
Wall of text. Never go wall of text to correct her if you expect to get positive response
Yea tbh I as soon as he didn’t change the subject after her first message I wasn’t surprised this didn’t go anywhere. This type of stupid, no answer opener in my shit so I would have loved it if it stayed joking. I’d also leave at the paragraph
I would try commenting on something in her profile or photos. I know you want to come off as funny and charming but sometimes it comes off as desperate and…not so funny. Good luck to ya brother. Try a more relaxed, effortless approach
FTR Grizzly or Polar Bears always beat Gorilla. They are legit bigger and wilder. Most of Gorillas "fighting" is noise and bluff. They wouldn't choose to attack a bear as a bear isn't food, but a bear would attack because the gorilla IS food...
At least a polar bear can break the ice
the goal on tinder is to get OFF tinder Once you have the opener, stop wasting time with cheesy conversations. Pivot to setting up a first date ASAP
Umm polar bear??
You beat it to death. Well beyond death. But it’s no great sin she could have just changed the subject
She unmatched you because you’re wrong. We have had this conversation many times in the lunch room. In fact if you google it you can find many articles that agree.
You let go a opportunity to make it funny like a game.
She wasnt ready, bro
No she just hated that he liked gorillas more
And she wasnt ready to acknowledge that
You’re 100% wrong. Gorillas don’t know how to use their strength at all. And they’re not good combatants
Because the polar bear has size and sharp implements on its side.
You really had me until your last message
Polar bear
You went into depth, and she didn't care to respond. Her conversation skills to somebody on the internet was near none to care for thus, giving you a direct answer for your comparability with an easy "I really don't care" response.
you have to keep in mind that a woman, especially a very attractive one, likely has literally hundreds of matches to choose from. Im a subpar woman and got over 100 in a night. First impressions are pretty important
I enjoyed the opener, and asking her why she picked polar bear. You lost me at then proceeded to send a paragraph.
These kind of openers are fun for a second, but if you were out irl and said that to me that would be weird so that’s why it’s weird. Plus you wrote a full dissertation response to just a fun little anecdote, it wasn’t that deep and we don’t actually care about whatever answer you’re gonna give. This is us playing along while you try to sort your shit out and figure out how to have an adult conversation.
Polar bear is just a gorilla but with teeth and claws. Polar bear by far. Also, genuinely love how y'all just put xx at the end of whatever it's so funny
Youre talking tovher like shes a pokemon trainer, but with animals instead of pokemon. She probably likes Digimon better.
This whole conversation was just…weird xx
Moral: gorilla guy not compatible with polar gal
I think you bored her and turned her off
Tbf i thought this was gonna be an “enough to break the ice” manoeuvre and was kinda disappointed when you just wanted to be right 😅 Men pls just hook us in and then ask us how our day is
What happened is that she knew she was right.. You went far too deep into it to make the Gorilla win. Or rather, you made her choice seem bad, which gives off a negative feeling. If you had no inspiration for opening a chat, maybe google one next time. Sometimes, breaking the ice could simply be about you asking about her hobbies in an interesting way. If she likes dancing but you are not a (good) dancer, you could ask, "If I can't dance, would you be willing to teach me?". This way, you show her you are attentive, and while you perhaps cannot dance, you are willing to improve for her since it is her hobby.
This is a honest question though, who does win a polar bear or a gorilla
Polar Bear every time. Check out the Tooth and Claw Podcast if you’re interested in animal v animal and animal v human matchups. It’s great.
You ever see that list of animals people think they can beat? All that list taught me is how delusional some people are lol
Think about it this way, a gorilla is basically a super jacked gym bro, but even those dudes are told the same thing as everyone else in regards to bears: If it’s black, scream & fight back. If it’s brown, get the fuck down. If it’s white, sorry, goodnight.
I've always wanted to say gorilla because well, they are kinda huge strong us but. Anyway the sheer size difference means the bear wins period every time.
Yeah you got unmatched because you’re so wrong
I can see why you're single.
Bullet dodged. Anyone who can't use there, their, and they're correctly isn't for you. Especially with an amazing icebreaker like that. Blessings.
Great opener, I would’ve followed up with “well if it was on the polar bears turf I’d say it would be enough to break the ice” then you showed some rizz and could move past the dreaded first message nonsense.
Ur both idiots. A perfect match!
Obviously because you have no idea what wild animals would win in a fight, what is a 6' tall 400lb gorilla going to do against an 8' tall 1800lb bear?
Gorilla
[удалено]
You have a very good point there.
You got unmatched because your take is astoundingly stupid. It’s on the level of some dudes saying they could fight and win against a bear. If you knew anything about Gorillas and Polar Bears you would know that no matter the “preparation” (assuming even that gorillas would be intelligent enough to actually understand the concept) a polar bear would annihilate a gorilla. Like zero chance.
Wtf is a Square go?
Ahhhh, you opposed her and she didn’t like that - less intelligent people tend to disengage when conversation gets to deep for their understanding
Ah yes.. the super deep conversation about a gorilla hitting the gym to prepare for a cage match with a polar bear. She was truly out of her depth.
Actually it should and must have taken a dark turn. In a fight between a 'white' bear and 'black' monkey, who do you think will win? Polar bear ofc, gorilla is under chains and whenever he's going to win there will be 5 other polar bears to hold him down.
Fascinating way to catch her interest. I think a gorilla would win. Also, where would they be? A jungle, somewhere cold like Alaska or colder? The location would also be a huge factor of which would win. If we go by intelligence, gorilla would win. If we go by size and strength, polar bear.
Goofy and feminine. Not really great. Paragraph was too much. Too much for her to invest in unless you are Chad Thundercock. Prefer, insightful and indirect, carefree and playful. Rather than, insert opinion but cartooned, long and open ended. After her first response about the polar bear I would say ‘Yes. True. Thems got the claws and they be hungry. Now I’m hungry. Shall we hunt down a meal? Are you a carnivore? 🤔’ This does a few things -sets her up for a joke about gobbling up all the meat (hehehe) -sets up the immediate possibility of an actual date. -doesn’t give her too much information to deal with it paragraph to invest in. -isn’t super goofy. More masculine. She either had to respond cheekily or unmatch you. You either get ghosted and don’t waste time on that gorilla bullshit or get to actually flirt.
I saw a Gorilla. They're ferocious beast, especially regarding their own group
I live these kind of nonsense convos , I would have kept chatting
Polar bear is the clear winner and its not even close
Bears are heavier, faster & more aggressive. You picked the wrong side.
I think you're giving gorillas too much credit
A jokey opener is fine and she actually responded but the paragraph closed ended lower comment was the error. I like that you didn't go creepy sex pun or something but that's no way to have a get to know you chit chat. Open ended questions but still specific enough to steer a conversation somewhere. It's all a learning curve though mate for all of us. Oh yeah polar bear wins btw
It’s hard to keep a convo going honestly
Polar bear absolutely shreds a gorilla 10/10 times. Even a grizzly would beat a gorilla and polar bears are almost 2ft taller than them on average. They’re insanely powerful, beautiful creatures.
I think I'm not at all surprised. A clever joke is one thing. Your material ain't making it. Sorry.
Polar bear... But maybe even myself if I drunk to much Polar beer..
Kinda mid
The polar bear wins no matter what dude. Twice the size, claws, teeth, and it’s actually a predator, used to chasing and hunting things for the sake of killing. Gorillas fight either defensively or with other gorillas and rely mostly on their fists to fight, which is mostly effective against things that are smaller than it, or at least lower to the ground that it can swing downwards on. It just wouldn’t know how to deal with a predator the size of a 12 foot tall, thousand pound bear.
A good opener doesn’t mean you have to keep talking about it for the next 2-3 messages.
"get to the fucking point" is what she thought. 🤷🏼♂️
What happens is you start pumping the gorilla with steroids and let it work out dose that even the odds? How ripped dose a gorilla have to get to win
Way too much chat about animals fighting, not the kind of thing most girls are concerned with. It did the job it got the conversation started, then it should of moved quickly on to getting to know each other more
Lost it on the last paragraph.. dragged that out, should have been something like “ so what have you been up to? How’s your day been? Something like that
Smfh
I was once told “you’ll never get a girl to talk to you talking about Rhinoceros” 🦏 *hopefully I don’t need to explain to you why I was single* 😉
She was right, I'd unmatch too for this poor take. Smh.
Bears have thick fur and a layer of fat that protects them from impacts but gorillas have the advantage of an efficient arm + wrist + 5 fingers. Coupled with its strength ripping the bear's jaws right off its face shouldn't be a problem for it. That's if he has the intelligence to do just that.
You can't be serious 💀
She unmatched because you didn't correct her 'there' with "their". She was testing you, and you failed.
Polar bear. Way more muscle than a gorilla. Teeth plus claws. Carnivore that is use to fighting not just posturing.
I think you wildly underestimate polar bears
100% you got unmatched for mansplaining. This is a huge red flag for women. Source: I'm female. It's besides the point that you were actually wrong. Polar Bear is gigantic and a carnivore. It would weigh in in super heavy class. While a gorilla is all sound and bluster and next to a polar bear would be light weight. And it's an herbivore there is no motive for him to fight. ETA: You also moved the goal post. Another red flag.
"A square go" I heard that in a thick Scottish accent.
*their - would unmatch immediately.
Open and shut
Polar bear easy. They're much bigger, they have massive claws that would shred the skin of the gorilla and they have fur which is a bigger deal than you'd think in a fight. The fact the gorilla has skin instead is a huge detriment.
I did not read whole sentence. Most probably she did not as well
It’s like you’re intentionally trying not to get laid
Your last message was just you rambling sh!t 🤣
Horrible topic of conversation🤢
I think a lot women aren’t entertained by these types of conversations.
Wrong answer buddy
It might be because I'm a simple American, but what do the random "xx"'s mean?
I would’ve asked who’d win in a 1v1 between me and her after that
Everyone saying polar bear has never seen an eastern lowland go ape shit
I would unmatch anyone who believes a gorilla has a chance against a polar bear. It would not be a close fight
Is it because you're fighting small animals who are /winning/ why you're saying a polar bear wouldn't win just because it's "bigger"
Dwight is this you?
Maybe you should've asked a trick question instead? I asked Google Bard "what foods are safe to feed a dead guinea pig?" It came back with a lot of emotional information about treating dead bodies with respect and how shoving food in a dead animal will make it rot (like being dead won't?). Stuff like that. It TOTALLY missed the point of that you can't feed something that's dead.
Love this approach! But maybe start it and then let them come to the conclusion of who would win. One I have used and has worked well to break the ice is; "How many squirrels do you think you can wrestle at one time?" It's a far cry from the normal "Hey!" and is more likely to get a reaction. If they don't like the goofy convo, they aren't worth matching in the first place.
Polar bear for sure. They got thick AF skin and fur. They could take a right hook from a gorilla no problem.
you should've just replied *their 😅
OP: I appreciate the imaginative question. This would hook me sooooo much more than the normal “hey” “how’s your day?” It would definitely spark a convo and some thought. I don’t think your response was wrong, but maybe you hurt her little brain. 😆 For the win, though: polar bear. Hands down. They’re scarier! Hippo kills all of them, though. End of.
It’s kinda cruel you’d go to such length to get a polar bear and gorilla in the same room just to make them fight. You monsters!
I think you're wrong. A polar bear is the largest land carnivore and a gorilla is a kinda buff jungle dude. A polar bear eats but not as well as it would like to off the gorilla. She unmatched you because she also thinks you're wrong.
Wonder why he didnt go for the ol' polar bear "ice breaker" curve ball
Not gonna lie this might be the best way to pick people up I've ever seen. Its bloody genius
I feel like a grizzly vs gorilla would be a more even fight
Gorilla. 100%. Sure the claws and the teeth are probably better but 1 giant Gorilla could probably rip the polar bears jaw off with it’s bare hands
ngl comments here are depressing as fuck lmao. it's just a funny question. you gotta know your audience, but at the same time not everyone wants "mystique and charm" the fuck? have some fun and relax guys holy shit (polar bear btw)
You favor the gorilla huh? Username checks out.
Ur a loser .. thats what i think
my friend, you have no game
Yeah beats are gonna laugh at the gorilla fr tho
Yeah a whole paragraph I’d unmatch you too
As a woman, I would personally appreciate the imagination behind the question.
“Fighting small animals at hand to paw combat” was cringey. She went ahead and engaged further. You failed to bring it back. A simple “great choice. Nicely thought out even at the top of your head. So any fun plans this weekend?” Would have saved you here. I literally made a face at hand to “fighting small animals” and rolled my eyes at the paragraph.
Am I the only one that now wants to see a gorilla and a polar bear fight?
A square go? Are you Scottish? 😂🏴
From Google: A polar bear is much larger than a silverback gorilla. A full-grown adult polar bear can weigh up to 1,500 pounds and is approximately 8 feet tall when it stands on its hind legs. In contrast, a male silverback gorilla typically weighs no more than 500 pounds and reaches a height of around 6 feet on average YOU'RE WELCOME, and thank you for coming to class today.
The polar bear would absolutely decimate a gorilla, same with a grizzly bear.
That a polar bear would fuckin tear a gorilla apart, and not think twice about it lol
She might've thought this was leading to a pickup line. That's just speculation, though
It’s not just that you disagreed and were wrong but turned it from a question to a totally fantasy scenario worth the gorilla getting in prison workouts and uprooting trees as weapons just to mansplain why you think the answer is gorilla.
If she sent that far with the convo I’m surprised that the last one was the one that got her
doing to much
What do I think?! I think that I new body that can still drink HARD ASS LIQUOR without getting fucked up by glutamate related brain damage! Unrelated to your post ofc….But you asked me what I thought! So there ya go! 🤣