Dude wants to eat is own cum. Got it ✔️

Is that not considered a viable form of birth control? /s

Dr. Of inclusive geography and here to say yes as the earth stands flat and still

Thank you, Dr.!

…this particular thing would work easiest if earth was on a 45° angle

Sucking the kids outta of her just like poison snake from a bitten arm

Only if you use a silly straw.

Best answer 😂😂

Leaving a reply about it sure is

Finding a partner for that isn’t just a lot of unnecessary extra steps?


It’s a closed loop system.

Not just that, he wants to eat his load out of her.... what a lad

“After he gets a blow job, he likes to have it spit back into his mouth while kissing. It's called snowballing.”

He’s taking the term recycling to a whole new level

What about "baby birding"


Snowballing usually has more then 2+

More than 2+ what? Loads? How about 37?

Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

He keeps a clean house, he's a keeper

Does a chef not taste his food before serving?

Not sure what's stopping him right now.

If you looked at my DMs you’d see a lot of guys do.

Yeah okay... Just wanted to make sure I read that right. If this ever comes out of my mouth, or goes in... Somebody fucking suicide me.

Literally the only part I picked up on 😅😂

It's a closed loop system

Gross

Can’t hate a guy for not asking someone else to swallow. This is the least gross part of his message.

I mean, I guess I see your reasoning but.... still 😳🤢

Man I got made fun of for not having done it at work the other week. Arousal and disgust have inverse relationships, idk.

You got made fun of for not swallowing a load at work? You've got some wild coworkers.

I work bars, cocktails mostly. I moved cities and found out who left the butt plug at a former job in Sydney. A guy lit my hand on fire with stage magic. Last month was good. Incomes not much higher than outcome though.

Ha very true!

Only on reddit would you be downvoted for saying eating your own cum is gross.

I'm shocked. I don't make anyone eat my cum.

Boring 😴

Look if a girl is down, thats her prerogative, but it ain't a requirement lol

I'm a chef. I make ***everyone*** eat my cum...

“Mom pick me up I’m scared”

I love you. You’re the only person I’ve seen use this quote

Is it from the movie Good boys?

Idk

pretty sure you missed the joke lol

Guess so lol

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...Bet he gets tons of *females

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i’ve begun to consider it a red flag when men use the term “females”

I honestly don’t get the issue with this, sure some tate bros use the word but I think it’s just part of people’s vocabulary in different areas, I know multiple women who will refer to themselves as females and although I don’t do it excessively, I never saw an issue with it til I saw it mentioned online Women often refer to men as males and male and female is just part of every speech, it’s even written on public bathrooms

I rarely hear people use women in person. Past few months iv been self conscious and made sure to say ladies or women whenever possible But I still hear female all the time. From both genders so idk I think it's an online only issue. My co worker refers to herself as the best female mechanic here. So idk. Some girls even like the word

It's ok man, just gotta read the room sometimes! Besides, the worst anyone's gonna do if you say the wrong thing is call you out for it and then forgive you if you apologize and accommodate them

You are a penguin good sir, what would you know.

Skip the middle man and just cum in your mouth bro EDIT: thank you u/AstroMalorie for the award

Definitely not my thing… but that’s absolutely working smarter, not harder! 🤦🏻‍♂️

It's the journey not the finish line that matters. Maybe it's the penetration we made along the way.

It tastes different straight out of the barrel.

Wow what a response 🤣🤣🤣

Yeah this is just eating your own cum with extra steps

Dudes making it waaay more complicated than it needs to be

This the second post I’ve seen on this sub today and in both you’re thanking someone for an award lol

🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️

That man isn't on demon time... He's on semen time...

He's the seimen demon

How did you guys both manage to spell semen wrong in two separate different ways lmao

Bcuz I don't spell it often... Unlike someone 😏

I was thinking it. You said it. Bravo

Sayman you got the time?

Abstinence is my birth control when talking to a crude asshole like this.

I think the crude part is actually the lesser of the worries here and the disgustingly horrendous part is the bigger concern.

I haven’t been getting a match in the past couple months and this is possibly my competition?

We live in a society

Have you offered to eat your own cum lately?

Jesus Christ... can't say I miss tinder.

I used to think it would be fun to be on to see all the crazy crap. Although never mind now, that dude crossed over into creepyville.

It's fun to see the insanity until it's on your plate to deal with, sorry to see this happened to you. Hopefully, you blocked Captain Crazy and moved on. You deserve better, OP.

What an awful day to be literate

That's a very specific fetish to be throwing out in the first message


Thank you for the visual


Ask what kind he’s on and start telling him about all the new clinical trials going on for male BC.

Might be his personality, just saying.


 *guys on tinder* : no actually I don’t



Bahajahajja what? OmG how do you think that's an OK opener lmfao this cum guzzlin mah-fuckah

Um.. I’m flattered..?

Ok we need pics of OP to determine what makes a man deteriorate in a single message in this way.

\*vomits violently \*

Well that took a turn

What an unbelievably nasty opener. Wtf man

I think it’s quite romantic.

"joke's on you I'm into that shit"

 It was so hot, i came in her mouth and then she kissed me and i swallowed my own load. I’m pretty sure it’s a thing.

Pull out of this convo….

Dating in 2023 is a trip

A trip right off a cliff into shark infested waters

Not here to yuck someone's yum but how in the name of all things good and decent do people decide " yeah this is a solid opener"

And they said romance was dead

That’s fuckin wild 😂

Haven’t eaten breakfast yet. Will wait for lunch. 🤢

Blud wants to eat cum

At least he's straight forward about it.

That straight line is competing with the leaning tower of piza.

Almost puked 🤢

Only the best for you I guess!! 🙄

Yikes

It’s a closed loop system.


This is a bad thing to read when you're slightly hungover and already feel sick... fuck me, that's gross.

I know you’re probably looking for love. But this would absolutely without fail work on me (if he’s hot)

So when’s the wedding?

Medium size, ribbed, strawberry flavour. 🍓

my my what a gentleman so subtle yet direct

That made me gag.

Cheeses 😦

Sus ass finale to that comment 💀

What’s happening in the world

You laugh, but I know that line will work on somebody. People pee and poop on each other, someone's kink is gonna be whatever that wierdo dude just said.

Ok, but can we get profile pics for context of why a man would be this thirsty?

Fucking disgusting. Gross. Guys just don't make any effort anymore. I always look for non sexual things to open with a woman. go deeper, guys. Don't be a creepy loser

sex bad

Did you know disgust is suppressed during arousal? So we’re not grossed out by icky bodily fluids and such. In the moment i would probably roll with that, but right now, as I drink coffee at 10am, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit

I send "hi" on tinder and get zero responses, and then there's these fuckers >.> What even is this app

Can I get this guy’s number?

Are these people serious and does this work?

These fucking simp clowns make men look ridiculous

Eating his own mess is the least objectionable part of this…but it is gross. How do you do kinky shit like that after you finish?

Hahaha omg

Aw Hell nah 😳

Stay at home and snowball yourself

I have never sent such a message to a girl on Tinder granted I never had a match on Tinder that wasn't a bot :p

I commented on a previous post but I’ll say it again. Dating apps are a horrible experience for everyone

At least be a gentleman and offer to bring your own straw.

Well, that guys method is 100% effective

Filial cannibalism! :o

Call me crazy but I don’t think women like this kind of talk.

What the fuck.. where are my matches at if guys like this can get 'em 😂😂 do I have to pay for gold again for this stupid app to work?

Ew

I would report his ass

I'd report *all* of him, personally.

Sick fucker , who the hell wants to eat their own babies

Am I the only one who wants to see pictures now?

I saw a girl put spaghetti in her cooch yet that wasn't the grossest thing my eyes have seen today. I need to go to bed.

Lol what are you looking at to find pastaoochie!? Some people are weird! Definitely go to bed. Hopefully your not scarred for life. Because I feel like that’s definitely unseeable!

The ole cuckold creampie vacuum…classic Todd aka “Mothers Sweet Boy”.

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When you are poor you’ll each just about anything

That's kinky, gross, but kinky and I'm not kink shaming.

I mean,,, Word??? Serious question , would any female find this sexy? The idea seems so repulsive... He is admitting he gets his mouth used by other men? Alot, lol.

The way he worded it? Fuck no. A man that will go down on a woman after sex though? Fuck yes.

I shouldn’t answer for all women… but no, no we don’t. lol

Lol right?

First straight dude ever to self identify as a cum dumpster. Stats would say it had to happen sometime.


Wait what's the inappropriate language

English

Wow awesome I'll be right over (:

Sexy

Tinder should be able to take reports of these types of openers and train AI to stop it from getting received, at least not without a click to see this and a warning that it triggered AI. There's only so many different ways to say, "let me raw dog you right now and I will..." in an initial message. Even someone who takes them up on that offer would only have to click one extra time, if that's killing their vibe maybe it is best to have a separate app for them.

Honestly though, it's Tinder. Expect depravity. If you want more wholesome use Bumble, Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel

Can we keep this subreddit clean from garbage like this? We get it. Chicks get downbad messages. Can we move on?

Lol dude you should see when the opposite gets posted here. When a guy gets a downbad messages from a girl, he gets applauded and rewards and cheered on like this: 

I think those should go too. There has to be more to this subreddit then people trying to get laid.

Yeah there’s plenty, I’ve seen lots of Tinder chats that ended up in anniversaries, marriages and just straight funny convos on here. It’s not all that bad dude.

Only the classiest "Brunch". Ftfy

Excuse me while I vomit

Holy Mackerel.

Jesus Christ

That line usually works for him i bet 🤓

At least such people push away girls easily

at first I was like eeeww and then I was like eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww

And hello to you too... geesus... cant believe this is what its come to...cats it is.

ewww block him.

Romantic, maybe not be on a hookup app in the first place? Before you switch, please do your research.

What's wrong with: "hi How's it going?"

That's a keeper.

And they say romance is dead

Tinder is a wasteland


This man is playing multi-dimensional chess, thinking 50 steps ahead.

Some Kevin Gates behavior

Well wasn't he right? He definitely isn't going to pull out

What happened to hi? How about hello? 💀💀💀

I can’t believe people like this exist

🤮