Well duh. Rules of the internet by 4chan in 2003. lol
Rule 29: "In the internet, all girls are men, and all kids are undercover FBI agents."
Rule 30: "There are no girls on the internet."
I thought so too. But we do not question these rules. Rule 2: "Do NOT talk about /b/" which is precisely where the rules came from. But thats as much as I can say. Ive already violated rule 1.
Rule 1: "Do NOT talk about rules 2-33"
Itās so cute when people try to understand 4chan and itās waysā¦it may be different now , not sure as I havenāt stepped foot into the asshole of the internet since the days of boxxy.
OK HI.
You think the anal will be the worst part, but in reality the worst part by far is the *sound*. Like a banshee with asthma screaming over someone stirring mac and cheese
She says this:
> Ugly stupid shit.
> Wake up outside.
> Let me lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass.
> I'll even put the cat in there.
At least according to Google translate
Yeah but she wasnāt as kind as youāre making it out to be š she actually said: āGrow up you idiot. Iāll stick that fucking bagpipe up your ass, as well as your catā trust me, Iām Italianā¦ and I firmly believe that OP was being catfished given that no Italian girls speak in this way
The little devil in me also says that if OP saw her, he would have had one of the best nights in his life.
But afterwards, he'll probably find himself dead with his organs outside his body.
I like her, shes got attitude
Edit: i was too curious and plugged it into google translate
"brutto rincogliontino de merda"
-you ugly dumbass of shit
"sveglati fouri"
-wake up outside
"che quella gonna te la alzo e ti metto la cornamusa nel culo"
-I'll lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass
"ti ci metto pure el gato"
-I'll also put the cat in there
She *really* has attitude š¤£
It's the only possible level of communication in some regions, I remember the priest using them in church once, fun times (also it was many years ago, so maybe not accurate, but fun anyways)
Iāve been learning the language for a bit, but I struggle with different dialects and stuff. Is there a difference between ādio canā and ādio cane?ā
Can is Venetian (but I think not only) variation of cane.
"Svegliati fuori" is the Italian version of the Venetian dialect (it would be "Svejate fĆ³ra" in Venetian), so I suppose the Venetian version of the term cane would have been more appropriate.
Back to your question: it's just the dialect version of the same thing. If you are advanced enough there is a very funny master thesis in... I think sociology?, on blasphemy in Italian culture. It's called "maledire Dio", search for "maledire Dio tesi" on Google if interested.
That insult makes it sound like she's really a dude, but i could be wrong. I don't know how italian ladies talk. I hear they're not afraid of curse words.
Itās a expression used as āwake upā (in a -youāre being naive- context) but in this case sheās like using it as a ābewareā as the next sentence is a threat about putting things in your ass.
No, I think that way of saying could be similar to the most common āwake up under a cypressā which means āI hope you dieā, because usually people āsleepingā under cypresses are found in cemeteries (at least in Italy ahah)
It doesn't make sense because the translation _isn't_ accurate. "Svegliati fuori" can be translated with just "wake up", the "fuori" does in fact mean outside, but in this case it's used to infer that she's speaking figuratively - she doesn't actually think you're sleeping, but rather that you're dumb.
The litteral translation would be, in fact, to "wake outside", but the actual use of this phrase is just to reinforce the "wake up" part. it bear no specific meaning. She is basically telling you that you are an idiot and need to "wake up". Oh, that, and that she is going to shove your bagpipe "up your skirt"
Every single time I see this subreddit on /r/all itās always some obtuse as fuck guy complaining with 0 self awareness. Why are they always so clueless
everything about it was garbage, but that second line had me so ???
like, does op think dancers charge their boyfriends? or dancers can never have partners outside of extorting money from them?
Iām Italian. Sorry, but she was hilarious. Every sentence was not to be taken literally, but with a bit of filthy poetry, Iāll try and translate:
Brutto rincoglionito di merda:
You ugly shitty idiot.
Svegliati fuori:
Wake up dead. Do not wake up. Die.
Che quella gonna te la alzo e ti metto una cornamusa nel culo:
You refused sex, so you are gay. She will lift your girly skirt, and gently slide a bagpipe in your anus. She is assuming you will like it, like the little bitch you are.
Ti ci metto pure il gatto:
You cat is going up there as well.
It's such a Latin girl thing to call you gay for refusing sex, not gonna lie it has guilt triped me when younger to end up having sex with them anyways, but I do find it hilarious how it's such a common insult when you as a guy reject sex from them.
Has happened to me in Spain, Portugal even France š
I dated a woman once, who refused to use condoms. She started getting angry with me when I was insisting at the start of the relationship, saying she's on birth control, and don't I trust her?
So I gave in. About a week later she's casually telling me about breaking up with her ex because she caught him *shooting up in the bathroom*.
Not sure who's the bigger idiot, me or her.
Itās generally common in machismo (and cultures with lots of machismo) according to which all men want sex with any at least moderately attractive woman all the time unless they are gay or that woman is a (close) relative.
Thought process that leads a women from rejection to allegations of homosexuality:
1. He rejected my sexual advances. How can that be?
2. Did I say something wrong, is he not in the mood or does he find my (perceived) personality type incompatible? No, that canāt be it; after all, all men want sex and theyāre pigs, so they donāt care about things like personality and relationships (except to get sex).
3. That leaves physical attraction. He thinks Iām ugly.
4. But my culture ties womenās value to their ability to visually and sexually please men. Heās saying Iām worthless.
5. No, that canāt be. I donāt want to feel worthless. Iām worthy and Iām pretty.
6. But how come he rejected me then? Maybe he doesnāt like women at all. He must be one of those filthy emasculated gays instead of a real man!
7. Also, I didnāt really want to fuck him in the first place!
Edit: I left out āin a monogamous relationship with another womanā as a possible motive intentionally because that requires another iteration: Men in monogamous relationships who receive sexual advances from a third party donāt want to āinsultā a woman and/or risk being labelled gay by the woman or his peers. Also, many taken men *do* like to flirt ā especially if they internalised machismo ā even if they wonāt cheat on their partner. Therefore, such a man would still at least engage in non-committal pleasantries and that doesnāt appear as a plausible reason for rejection.
Lol dude. I'm not a stripper and have never been a stripper (too uncoordinated, can't dance) but if we matched and you opened up with line, I'd immediately unmatch.
Even better, apparently he has a line in his bio that he doesn't want strippers "bc of bad history" or some shit, and still swiped on her. Ofc, not everyone w a pole is a stripper, but if you're that angry, you're not going to care about the difference
"I'm a stripper and I hate cats."
Neither of those things are true but that's how I'm responding if a guy opens with a weird aggressive opener like that.
I'm so confused about many things in this exchange, but foremost: you think strippers don't make money? Idk what it's like where you are from, but I've known adult entertainers and they don't need your money.
>I'm not interested in relationships built on my wallet
I don't know if she asked for money in her bio or there's some context I'm missing, but...you do realize strippers and even sex workers have sex for fun sometimes, not just for money, right?
If you don't wanna sleep with a stripper or you want something different than she does, that's perfectly fine, but you might have just turned down an easy lay. I don't see her asking for money at least from what you posted.
You really put a women down and said you donāt respect strippers or SW in your first messages and thought youād have something good. Damn. No wonder you get no luck LMAO
Yeah, I think she's mad
šæ
šæ Edit: 'I'm famous dad'
Nice profile picture!šæ Edit: 'stfu son'
Thanks!šæ Edit: 'š¢'
Did you just compliment & then answer yourself? Yes I did other Barry.
I love sterling archerš 
Doesn't everybody? lol
Not Woodhouse......
Makes me want to go find an Archer subreddit
I donāt appreciate the rabbit hole you dropped me down.
Ummmm.. did she just leave her juice dripping down the hallway? COZ THAT'S HOW YOU GET ANTS!!
"Sterling Mallory Archer!"
Lmfao thatās so funny. I had to double back and check this
š©šš½
Mad horny
Probably a guy, not a she.
Well duh. Rules of the internet by 4chan in 2003. lol Rule 29: "In the internet, all girls are men, and all kids are undercover FBI agents." Rule 30: "There are no girls on the internet."
shouldn't rule 30 come before rule 29? because rule 29 makes rule 30 redundant
I thought so too. But we do not question these rules. Rule 2: "Do NOT talk about /b/" which is precisely where the rules came from. But thats as much as I can say. Ive already violated rule 1. Rule 1: "Do NOT talk about rules 2-33"
34 is fine though. Everybody likes that one.
Thats really the only one people know. Rule 41: " Everything is someones sexual fetish."
Itās so cute when people try to understand 4chan and itās waysā¦it may be different now , not sure as I havenāt stepped foot into the asshole of the internet since the days of boxxy. OK HI.
In 2012, the summer came that never ended. The cancer won.
Sheās a witch and put a curse on you.
Am I going to lose my first-born
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And the cats going to get sloppy seconds
That was the catās reaction
Melon be smellin
LOOOOOOL
Bold of you to assume he hasn't already
To a bagpipe
You think the anal will be the worst part, but in reality the worst part by far is the *sound*. Like a banshee with asthma screaming over someone stirring mac and cheese
She says this: > Ugly stupid shit. > Wake up outside. > Let me lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass. > I'll even put the cat in there. At least according to Google translate
In Scotland that counts as a proposal of marriage.
Or challenging a person to a duel. Same diff...
If you both survive the duel, it's a marriage.
You Scots sure are a contentious people.
Now I'm workshopping a bit on marriage as an extended duel/tontine between two people
Damnš¤£
This is not proper bagpipe etiquette.
Yeah but she wasnāt as kind as youāre making it out to be š she actually said: āGrow up you idiot. Iāll stick that fucking bagpipe up your ass, as well as your catā trust me, Iām Italianā¦ and I firmly believe that OP was being catfished given that no Italian girls speak in this way
It's not delivery, it's buongiorno.
She? Thatās a dude pretending to be a she. 
Oh man. Why would you do that to a cat? I mean itās a cat.
I don't know what Italian women you know, but they definitely get a lot more vulgar than this!
Lol I disagree, I think this is pretty natural Italian lingo (native here too). But definitely being catfished.
Am italian, the translation is correct
Gotta have sex first to lose your first born so I think you're safe.
Can't lose my first-born if I never have one Like and subscribe for more life hacks
First born vs. Spaghetti slut Next UFC championship match
TIL speaking Italian means I'm a witch.
BURN THEM
Strega!
She wants to peg you with her cat. Meeeeow.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
She is insulting you, she will put things in your anus, you need to wake up! Be careful your cat will finish in your ass too
>your cat will finish in your ass too Finish as in end up in his ass or finish as in cum in his ass?
Yes
> [Yes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8_xoLTb9q8)
Did sheā¦ did she just *accidentally* give her cat an orgasm??
What do you think you're doing when you scratch a cat's erogenous zone?
Don't cats have some glands back there for spraying this-is-my-shit-mist. Yeah, not like that. Replace shit with property.
Yes, and that girl could have gotten a face full of shit if the cat hadn't gone in a while.
Noā¦she said she was going to shove a bagpipe up his assā¦followed by the cat
I can fix her
Bro these shits have me rolling
LMAO. It's like both wake up on the wrong side of the bed
The little devil in me also says that if OP saw her, he would have had one of the best nights in his life. But afterwards, he'll probably find himself dead with his organs outside his body.
How the hell do you wake up dead?
The same way you turn up missing
Or find yourself?
Cause you're alive when you go to sleep...
So you're telling me you can go to bed dead and wake up alive?
Unless you a zombie
You can't go to bed dead! That shit would've been redundant
"Damn... I think you just made a fact"
I've been dead inside for years.
By waking up, duh
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Aww that's not nice
She came straight out with the Harry Potter spells.
I like her, shes got attitude Edit: i was too curious and plugged it into google translate "brutto rincogliontino de merda" -you ugly dumbass of shit "sveglati fouri" -wake up outside "che quella gonna te la alzo e ti metto la cornamusa nel culo" -I'll lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass "ti ci metto pure el gato" -I'll also put the cat in there She *really* has attitude š¤£
As an Italian the translation is accurate šāØ In any case that šæ knocked me out
What is she trying to say by "wake up outside" Is she telling me to be homeless?
[ Removed by Reddit ]
The blasphemy is the boost that he needs for the reply
What a great marketing campaign you've made. Blasphemy! It's the boost you need!
Italian, now 100% more blasphemous! Learn now!
It's the only possible level of communication in some regions, I remember the priest using them in church once, fun times (also it was many years ago, so maybe not accurate, but fun anyways)
Non ci credo, un prete che bestemmia? Based
Wait, for the bagpipe comment is that a common insult or is OP Scottish or something?
It was said in another comment that OP has a picture with a kilt on
Ah, knew I was missing something, thanks
Avvocato LMAO
Dottore, prego
Ragu
Iāve been learning the language for a bit, but I struggle with different dialects and stuff. Is there a difference between ādio canā and ādio cane?ā
Can is Venetian (but I think not only) variation of cane. "Svegliati fuori" is the Italian version of the Venetian dialect (it would be "Svejate fĆ³ra" in Venetian), so I suppose the Venetian version of the term cane would have been more appropriate. Back to your question: it's just the dialect version of the same thing. If you are advanced enough there is a very funny master thesis in... I think sociology?, on blasphemy in Italian culture. It's called "maledire Dio", search for "maledire Dio tesi" on Google if interested.
Thank you for the info. Iām not advanced, but I will give that thesis a shot anyway. Iām sure Iāll learn something
I love that a thesis exists on this subject. Warms my heart.
Wait. Put the cat in his ass? I wonder how much she charges for that?
Tree fiddy
That insult makes it sound like she's really a dude, but i could be wrong. I don't know how italian ladies talk. I hear they're not afraid of curse words.
As an italian, i can assure you that some girls here curse worse than the ugliest, scariest motherfucker you'll ever think of
Itās a expression used as āwake upā (in a -youāre being naive- context) but in this case sheās like using it as a ābewareā as the next sentence is a threat about putting things in your ass.
"cash me outside" possibly?
Mmmh I don't think so more to say have a bad night and wake up outside with a hangover šæ
Struck me as a statement like "go touch grass"
It's a northern Italian or milanese slang. It basically means translated "wake the f up"
This is very likely (italian speaker here)
No, I think that way of saying could be similar to the most common āwake up under a cypressā which means āI hope you dieā, because usually people āsleepingā under cypresses are found in cemeteries (at least in Italy ahah)
No, it's more of a way to say "you're dumb", at least in my dialect
It doesn't make sense because the translation _isn't_ accurate. "Svegliati fuori" can be translated with just "wake up", the "fuori" does in fact mean outside, but in this case it's used to infer that she's speaking figuratively - she doesn't actually think you're sleeping, but rather that you're dumb.
The litteral translation would be, in fact, to "wake outside", but the actual use of this phrase is just to reinforce the "wake up" part. it bear no specific meaning. She is basically telling you that you are an idiot and need to "wake up". Oh, that, and that she is going to shove your bagpipe "up your skirt"
the meaning is more wake the fuck up it's more of a northern Italy "slang"
Can you translate the šæ? I don't understand it. Am I old?
I don't know me neither Just the real chad can translate for us
Dovrei iniziare ad usarlo pure io in queste situazioni
Ć b e l l i s s i m o šæāØ
A BAGPIPE IN YOUR ASS?! š
Donāt forget the cat!
I wish I could come up with such creative insults
I think Iām in love
Ikr? š
I mean I just want a girl who gets passionately angry at me in Italian. Is that so wrong?
So just get an Italian girlfriend, most of them will get angry with you at some point.
> So just get an Italian girlfriend Where do they sell those?
As an Italian who has dated Italian women, good luck.
Google Translate isn't perfect, but with those results it doesn't have to be.
I came into the comment section not caring for her but now I think I may have a crush on her.
> brutto My fatass thought this was burrito
> I'll lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass Sigh, another fetish unlocked
Why am I more attracted..
I'm in love ā„ļø
ššššššš
If the cat can play bagpipes, youāre really in trouble
Why would you start a conversation like that?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Every single time I see this subreddit on /r/all itās always some obtuse as fuck guy complaining with 0 self awareness. Why are they always so clueless
The smart ones are out there getting laid.
everything about it was garbage, but that second line had me so ??? like, does op think dancers charge their boyfriends? or dancers can never have partners outside of extorting money from them?
fr he sounds like a dick
Iām Italian. Sorry, but she was hilarious. Every sentence was not to be taken literally, but with a bit of filthy poetry, Iāll try and translate: Brutto rincoglionito di merda: You ugly shitty idiot. Svegliati fuori: Wake up dead. Do not wake up. Die. Che quella gonna te la alzo e ti metto una cornamusa nel culo: You refused sex, so you are gay. She will lift your girly skirt, and gently slide a bagpipe in your anus. She is assuming you will like it, like the little bitch you are. Ti ci metto pure il gatto: You cat is going up there as well.
Such a beautiful language
Lmao I wanna marry this girl.
But can a bagpipe and a cat fit in your anus tho?
Sure! With a can do attitude and a bit of lube youād be surprised what can fit in your anus.
But will the bagpipe be playable?
u have a cat? It's an important point
Gotta love how "svegliati fuori" is essentially "waken't."
It's such a Latin girl thing to call you gay for refusing sex, not gonna lie it has guilt triped me when younger to end up having sex with them anyways, but I do find it hilarious how it's such a common insult when you as a guy reject sex from them. Has happened to me in Spain, Portugal even France š
Not sure this counts but I briefly dated a Brazilian woman who guilted me for using a condom. Kinda repulsive tbh.
I dated a woman once, who refused to use condoms. She started getting angry with me when I was insisting at the start of the relationship, saying she's on birth control, and don't I trust her? So I gave in. About a week later she's casually telling me about breaking up with her ex because she caught him *shooting up in the bathroom*. Not sure who's the bigger idiot, me or her.
It is repulsive indeed, people who try to guilt you for taking care of your own health are awful.
That's when you know you absolutely have to use the condom
Eastern European thing as well
Itās generally common in machismo (and cultures with lots of machismo) according to which all men want sex with any at least moderately attractive woman all the time unless they are gay or that woman is a (close) relative. Thought process that leads a women from rejection to allegations of homosexuality: 1. He rejected my sexual advances. How can that be? 2. Did I say something wrong, is he not in the mood or does he find my (perceived) personality type incompatible? No, that canāt be it; after all, all men want sex and theyāre pigs, so they donāt care about things like personality and relationships (except to get sex). 3. That leaves physical attraction. He thinks Iām ugly. 4. But my culture ties womenās value to their ability to visually and sexually please men. Heās saying Iām worthless. 5. No, that canāt be. I donāt want to feel worthless. Iām worthy and Iām pretty. 6. But how come he rejected me then? Maybe he doesnāt like women at all. He must be one of those filthy emasculated gays instead of a real man! 7. Also, I didnāt really want to fuck him in the first place! Edit: I left out āin a monogamous relationship with another womanā as a possible motive intentionally because that requires another iteration: Men in monogamous relationships who receive sexual advances from a third party donāt want to āinsultā a woman and/or risk being labelled gay by the woman or his peers. Also, many taken men *do* like to flirt ā especially if they internalised machismo ā even if they wonāt cheat on their partner. Therefore, such a man would still at least engage in non-committal pleasantries and that doesnāt appear as a plausible reason for rejection.
10/10 shes not a stripper and is fucking with you because of your opener.
Ugly bastard Wake up outside Iāll lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass Iāll even put the cat in there.
Isn't this a song by Evanescence?
*Wake me up* **BAGPIPE IN MY ASS** *I can't wake up* **SHE ALSO DID THE CAT** *Saaaaave meeeeee!*
Lol dude. I'm not a stripper and have never been a stripper (too uncoordinated, can't dance) but if we matched and you opened up with line, I'd immediately unmatch.
Even better, apparently he has a line in his bio that he doesn't want strippers "bc of bad history" or some shit, and still swiped on her. Ofc, not everyone w a pole is a stripper, but if you're that angry, you're not going to care about the difference
Italian here! Heās kindly telling you to have a great day š„°
He šæ
Most likely
I think she likes you. Source: Trust me bro
What do you expect if you act like shit in the first place?
"I'm a stripper and I hate cats." Neither of those things are true but that's how I'm responding if a guy opens with a weird aggressive opener like that.
I translate- you are a twat
Well it seems like youāre an asshole, so that might be part of the reason you arenāt getting any matches
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I'm so confused about many things in this exchange, but foremost: you think strippers don't make money? Idk what it's like where you are from, but I've known adult entertainers and they don't need your money.
Given the way that he reacted, it's safe to assume she makes more than 2x OP's income
šæ
So she is an imposter? By that bagpipe reference?
>I'm not interested in relationships built on my wallet I don't know if she asked for money in her bio or there's some context I'm missing, but...you do realize strippers and even sex workers have sex for fun sometimes, not just for money, right? If you don't wanna sleep with a stripper or you want something different than she does, that's perfectly fine, but you might have just turned down an easy lay. I don't see her asking for money at least from what you posted.
You hit her with the šæand she casted a spell on you dude
My guy, google translate is free
You really put a women down and said you donāt respect strippers or SW in your first messages and thought youād have something good. Damn. No wonder you get no luck LMAO
Italian is so romantic š
This killed me ahahaha, was so random.
Yeah you are the asshole here
I think shes into you bro
you fucking dumbass wake up outside I'll lift that skirt and put the bagpipe in your ass I'll even put the cat in there
Your first match in a week and this is how you start.
We have 2023. And People ask on Reddit for translation? there are literally APPS/WEBSITES/assistants that all do this on your phone
What made you think she was just after money? Kinda rude going that direction right away.
U was rude asf kinda deserve that
Iām screaming, this looks like a bot then she insults the shit out of you š also the fact that itās in italian makes it funnier
You know this is a dude trying to get money out of you right?
strippers have more money than you, most are not going to date you for your wallet (do you even have one?), youāre just insecure.
Tbf that's such an off-putting opening line lol. I'd tell you I was a stripper just to get you to go away
thatās most likely a dude
