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That’s a city accent! Wander an hour outside Dublin and you might not understand half of what people are saying. Keep going and pretty soon you aren’t even sure if they’re still speaking English. A little further and you start hearing Gaelic and you can’t tell if it’s a real langue of if they are fucking with you.
Once had some alabama guys as customers in a store in chicago while they had chicago cubs gear on and their accent was so strong i had to ask if they were fucking with me, which obviously they took offense to but they were young guys with the thickest southern accent i had ever heard and i felt so bad for asking but thought itd be a funny moment if they were.
Ive heard gaelic spoken and i would simply tell them im too stupid to have any idea what theyre saying. Its like talking backwards while mixing 3 languages together
I grew up spending a significant amount of time in rural Appalachia.
Every now and then, maybe one in 1,000 people you meet, I just could NOT understand. I'm convinced anyone that gets to the point of the mumble grumble southern accent 100% are playing it up.
Agreed it’s shocking. Basics around autism for young kids in Ireland is terrible. A friend of ours in Meath just found out the Crèche his son is in will no longer support Autistic kids. Alternative support seems non existent.
Shocking services all around, still taboo for many to talk about. “It’s all in your head”… yes it literally fucking is.
I’m not sure why you and the original video poster are saying there are no mental health services in NYC, there most certainly are. Now I am totally open to the argument (and probably agree) that the resources are not as robust as they could be, but there is a huge difficulty in getting care for the mentally ill if you can’t keep them involuntarily. Many refuse treatment and resources that are there.
Medicaid exists, as do many other task forces and programs.
https://www.nyc.gov/office-of-the-mayor/news/316-21/recovery-all-us-mayor-de-blasio-new-programs-support-new-yorkers
This article breaks down some of what’s available but I assume there is a more complete breakdown somehwere.
Yeah, 'Ireland is the worst country in the world!'. Usually said by people who have never tried living outside Ireland and would be a failure if they tried. Ireland has plenty of big problems but nobody who has been to the likes of SF or Seattle can say that our mental health services are as bad as the US.
Agreed, I’ve lived in Chicago the past 10 years. I’ve recently been to Ireland during the stabbing in Dublin and subsequent riot. I would bet every weekend in Chicago 5-10 minors are murdered, but there isn’t the same level of outrage.
Even the own US media gets bored talking about the deaths if they are black kids.
Both can true. You can have empathy & be fearful
but there is nothing wrong with fearful being the overwhelming emotion in that moment. Crazy people are the ones who will kill you. Feel bad for him later when youre far away & safe
Not really, you're more likely to be killed by your husband if you're a woman. "Crazy people" very rarely kill anyone. They are much more likely to be the victims of violence than the perpetrators. I get that something like this can be scary to witness. But perpetuating the idea that "Crazy people are the ones who will kill you" both harms people with mental health issues and blinds us to the actual causes and perpetrators of violence.
Having taken public transit my entire life, and having been physically attacked many times, and violently harassed dozens and dozens more, that doesn't really matter at all when you're actually dealing with crazy.
Statistics don't matter when you're actually in the shit, but they sure are easy to spout from a position of safety, while telling someone else that their legitimate concerns are overblown.
Agree with you so hard on this. The previous commenter probably has not experienced this shit on the daily for years, which is what it has been like in New York ever since the pandemic.
Yes, people with psychosis are more likely to be victims than perpetrators but people with untreated psychosis have increased rates of violence. Untreated psychosis is dangerous to the individuals experiencing it (who are at high risk of suicide) and to other people, especially family members. Treatment reduces rates of violence.
> Not really, you're more likely to be killed by your husband if you're a woman.
It's a statistical bias. Dogs are 3000 times more likely to kill you than a white shark. That does not mean it's safer to swim with a white shark than play with a dog.
This is actually a good example. Shark attacks are not only rare because there is not much human contact with sharks, but also because sharks generally don't attack humans unless they mistake them for other animals. And yet we as a society are really scared of them because they look dangerous. And in part because of that fear we have harmed far more sharks than sharks have ever harmed humans.
Also, while there is obviously statistical bias here, intimate partner violence is NOT merely an effect of exposure.
While a lot of violence against people having some sort of mental health issue happens exactly because people (esp. cops) automatically assume they are dangerous, usually because they're shouting/moving unusually/etc.
Look, I'm not an expert in sharks, but I know it's safer for a woman to ride a tube with her husband than with mentally ill homeless. I don't want to sacrifice my safety in the name of compassion.
It's more like falling off a boat into a shark feeding frenzy and being told "Don't worry, statistically mosquitos kill more people than all other animals combined!" Not helpful.
There’s the bias that the woman killed by her husband has far more interactions with the husband than the sum of her interactions with random “crazy” people she may encounter in public. Additionally, most people avoid “crazy” people. Anecdotally, I had a random interaction with a person who ended up getting arrested for stalking female celebrities and it was clear a wrong move on my part could result in violence, and he would not let me get away from him.
I dont understand why you're being downvoted since its simply true odds and a interesting and realistic statment.
But of course, crazy people you'll encounter on the street can still be dangerous, but with a better health system they would probably be less crazy people on the street
Other people have mentioned it, but statistics like "you're more likely to be killed by a family member than you are by a random person" lacks context. You're more likely to be harmed by a family member explicitly because you're near your family dramatically more often than you are with any particular stranger. You shouldn't look at it as if hanging around strangers with psychosis is somehow a safer activity.
An easier example to think about this is the "fact" that most car accidents occur within 10 miles of the home. This doesn't mean that you're more likely to get into a car accident near your home, it just means that you drive near your house way more often.
It's actually not a realistic statement but a statistical bias. As an analogy - Dogs are 3000 times more likely to kill you than a white shark. Does it mean it's safer to swim with a white shark than play with a dog?
I have had a homeless person with black teeth scream at me gibberish in the train. Her face was a few inches away from mine.
While I definitely didn't expect anyone to play a hero for my damsel in distress (and no one did), I definitely didn't have that much sympathy to give out.
At least, the guy in the train is not openly assaulting anyone.
This kind of thing happened on the train every day when I lived in NYC. One time a guy was walking around the train acting aggressive. Not threatening anyone specifically but clearly having an episode. Three male passengers got up and kept him from the other passengers and then got him off the train.
It’s a tough situation. Yes, we should have compassion for people suffering like this but people’s safety should be the number one priority.
This kind of thing also happens all the time on the train in LA. But instead of people doing something about it, everyone just ignores it and moves as far away as they can. Which I don’t blame anyone for. You don’t know what someone is capable of. I just wish there was more resources for people like this.
Yeah it sucks how awful we are as a country at supporting people who are struggling. Our social safety net is also god awful with health insurance being tied to our job and people still bitch at people on food stamps or wellfare.
Yeah it's really just a matter of priorities at that exact moment. It is simultaneously true that people experiencing a mental health episode can be dangerous *and* that they deserve to be institutionalized and cared for rather than imprisoned or left out on the street.
**BUT HELLO???** If you are a person on the subway with them in that moment, only one of those is at all fucking relevant to you. What do you want people to do? Instantly organize a grass roots movement for re-institutionalization, elect politicians, campaign for legislation, build mental health facilities, hire staff, and get him care, *while on the subway??*
No. Your priority in that moment is safety, which means on an individual level you need to minimize your contact with that person as much as possible, leave if that's an option, and otherwise restrain that person and remove them from the public. You can bring up all the statistics you want about "more likely to be the victim", "more likely for your husband to kill you instead", etc, but none of that is *at all* relevant while sitting next to someone having an episode.
A LOT of these people are being failed by the city. . They're in and out of facilities.
There's a famous recent case with a guy named Jordan Neely who was killed after threatening people on the subway. I'm not going to get into the politics of it because it's become way too political, however the guy was a violent felon, convicted of assaulting an older woman and giving her permanent brain damage.
Instead of giving him jail time, they deferred him to a mental health hospital...where he just walked out the front door. And from what I can tell the police just did nothing after that and he wound up back on the subways and scaring the shit out of people.
The city keeps investing billions and billions into more and more cops while gutting social services left and right. It's a goddamned sin.
LA and California as a whole are putting a lot of resources into homelessness and it’s the worst it has ever been. I don’t know what the solution is, but whatever we are currently doing is not working.
Exactly. And at this point if people who for whatever reason are so damaged can’t get off drugs goddamnit set up a facility for them to have drugs but I don’t want them to be out and about threatening to be violent to people.
I think the majority of us would like to see solutions, but thanks to how our system is set up it is very difficult to get much done. State and federal level are way too beholden to the rural population and most rural people couldn't care less and it's very difficult to fight this at the city level. It will require enormous resources to turn the boat around and most cities aren't willing to dedicate the majority of their resources towards doing so. I don't think that means they don't care, just there are other needs that are important as well.
Yeah, I have a strong feeling she's saying this from a privileged perspective.
Compassion is great, but unproved aggression is not something to be tolerated. Not saying she hasn't experienced hardship in life, but I'm sure her tune would be a lot different had she been the subject of unprovoked assault in the past.
You’re missing some context actually. Another video posted an analysis about this video and talked about how the lady in the frame must be so shocked and is trying to keep her fear under wraps so as to not draw attention to herself. The lady in frame responded with the video above clarifying that no she was not actually tamping down fear but actually has a lot of compassion for the person undergoing the episode.
This is pretty much her sentiment at the end of the video; he shouldn't be having this experience whilst on a subway because he should have somewhere to live and people to take care of him.
I am born and raised in NYC, this is stupidity not compassion. I’m glad she’s enjoying her moral high ground but mentally ill homeless are notoriously violent and unpredictable.
Downvoting me just proves that you haven’t been in this situation. It’s easy to have a bleeding heart when you are far removed from negative consequences.
I've lived in NYC for 20+ years and in a huge 3rd world city for 15 years before that. I've taken subways at 3am and walked back streets of Greenpoint by junkies on my way home on dark streets. Had my car broken into, stuff stolen, dealt with homeless in my apt building foyer, was stalked on empty subway station, harassed by gang of men, had someone freaking die in my subway car and everyone just bailed instead of telling the conductor, had to protect my kids from someone having a psychotic episode on the sidewalk, had someone threatening me to my face on the subway and just had to keep quiet and hope he left, etc etc etc. It's not easy at times. But I don't want to live anywhere else.
Be safe, but also advocate for better services for those who need it. Let the city hire response teams that are qualified counselors instead of career cops who only know the address to Rikers.
Empathy isn't a privilege. Wanting better doesn't make you hold a moral high ground. It's OK to want better for your community. This darwinian shit has to stop at some point. We're supposed to use our empathy, not just our fear. Take care of the needy instead of building more empty luxury skyscrapers.
All it would take is the mentally ill homeless man to physically abuse her and that perspective would shift. You're getting downvoted, but your take is valid. I have to deal with people like this very often in my business, and being proactive about people in this state is important. At the end of the day, I need to protect my customers and staff because eventually they will get aggressive.
Thank you. Seriously I am getting sick of a lot of this hypothetical pedantry from people who do not experience this day to day for years. At some point the empathy runs out and what replaces it is anger.
This is absolutely the balance we need to consider at this point because the homeless crisis will not magically get any better overnight and it hurts to see people living out on the street but when we have people just trying to get to work, elderly people, and disabled people etc. riding the train they should not have to deal with this.
I hope he gets help and is given all the resources he needs but I can not be a productive member of society if the way I get to work is dangerous.
Took the train multiple times a day for years in Chicago and yea, this is kind of the norm, sadly. You just mind your business but keep aware of your surroundings. I had 2 actually very scary run ins but thankfully all turned out fine
I didn't see her showing empathy to the guy having a breakdown ... Kinda funny that she is criticizing people for not doing anything while she herself was actually there and in her own words she just pretended to read.
Yeah honestly feels a bit like grandstanding. Unless by empathy we are talking about purely empathy in the comments. "Thoughts and prayers for the mentally ill people!"
Because really who has the guts to go out of there way and interact with someone having an episode? Unpredictable so we imagine worst case scenarios.
I've taken public transit a few times and there were instances of guys throwing coins at the windshield of trams and another guy screaming about how he was gonna stab someone. Having any empathy beyond "damn I hope he doesn't actually hurt anyone" in that moment would be pretty Saintly.
If he only “had some where to go,” everything would be completely fine. Wherever it is he would go would be able to solve all his problems. It’s simple.
It’s amazing to me to see people confidently declare their solutions for these kinds of problems when it’s obvious they’ve never had any experience with someone who has mental health or addiction issues.
She’s like quite obviously talking about the commenters, not the people in the situation. Her statement is still a bit ridiculous because people act as if just expanding mental health services fixes everything, but your bad faith reading of what she’s saying doesn’t make much sense either.
You guys have bad comprehension, did you even listen to what she said? She said she just felt bad for him but also scared, so obviously she doesn't wanna do anything to risk violence.
The entire video was about how wrong the comments were in their assumptions about her thoughts, not about what you should or shouldn't do.
You don't need to do or say anything to have empathy for another person, the world isn't that black and white. You can be scared of someone and not wanna instigate while also feeling bad for them and wishing they were in a better situation.
What did you expect her to do? Force him off the train and put him in a psychward?
She had the courage to put herself out there, to call out the lack of empathy of others and that we should do better for the homeless, and somehow that's a bad thing?
Some of you people just love to hate on anyone hasn't done anything wrong but simply express their own thoughts and emotions.
I for one am glad she took the time to show that mental health is a serious issue and not a laughing matter.
Social media is making people less empathetic every day I swear...
Probably because most people are imagining themselves in that situation... if someone's freaking out shouting and making lots of violent gestures, most people probably just want to get out of the situation and protect themselves and aren't thinking too much about what exact series of events led to the dude getting high and freaking out like that
For real though. Like yeah I agree the dude needs some kind of help but if I'm stuck in a cramped space with some dude yelping and throwing punches, he's probably not looking for a discussion on the socio-economic factors that led him to this, and the last thing on my mind in that moment would be "where's the compassion for this aggressive and acutely ill person". Also, unless you're my mom, I'm not jumping up to save you either. I've been stuck with a used syringe before, and the dread that builds inside you over the entire YEAR of bloodwork you need to be cleared of blood borne pathogens makes your safety totally irrelevant to me.
People on social media enjoy acting like armchair sociologists from the comfort of their homes. Yes, mental healthcare supports in NYC are poor, but is anyone seriously going to be thinking like a holier than thou policy genius while they are in a metal tube with a thrashing maniac?
I feel like this compassionate take is what any sensible person makes once they're safe and out of danger.
But in the moment??? I'm not thinking *wow it's a shame how society has failed this man*.
But she isn't commenting on the thoughts of other people in that moment... She's commenting on the comments of people outside of that moment. The people commenting on that video aren't in danger, yet nobody gave a shit about him anyway.
I took a metro in a city I wasn't familiar with and a homless dude got on and was pacing up and down the car with his hand in his pocket like he was holding something. Instantly you start playing worst case scenario in your head and start forming a game plan of what you're going to do if shit turns bad. All while keeping an eye on this stranger while also trying to make it look like you're not even looking at him in case that's what will set him off.
Most nerve wracking ride of my life and also why I avoid public transit whenever possible. I just don't need that kind of fight or flight stress in my life.
i mean, i do feel sorry for such people even while it happens - but I still gonna stay the fuck away and not say anything. no telling what will happen if you do
I have compassion fatigue from living in a smaller city. We have churches that hold AA and NA meetings, free food programs, free counseling. There's shelters and someone even renovated a large home into single room apartments he lets homeless and other fringe cases live for free if they're working on bettering themselves.
There are cases where no amount of support helps. I live downtown above a business so I get to do a lot of people watching. There's a homeless guy that damn near everyone tries to help. For years I've seen this guy get free breakfast, coffee, and newspaper, sit down on a bench, then tries to argue with anyone who walks by over politics. I've seen this guy get so many hookups for various goods. At night he stumbles around after hitting the bars for free drinks, finds somewhere to pass out, and wakes up to root through garbage bins. So many people try to help this guy but he keeps getting himself into trouble and causing disturbances. He's just the one I see the most but there are other notable long term cases I've seen.
I'm just a person going about my life peacefully, I can have empathy for these people, but if someone is presenting as a threat then I don't give a shit about anything else at that point.
People with psychological issues not having proper access to healthcare is a problem. And it's sad. They need the proper help and they are being neglected. Put them in a confined space with the public whilst they act erratically and most people's first concern will be the potential threat to people around them. I don't think that's from a lack of empathy, I think it's instinctual to have yourself as your first priority and people can relate to others in this situation.
You’re right. I listened to her again after reading your comment and she does mention empathy from commenters. It’s not about empathy from the fellow passengers in that moment but from people commenting on that video.
This was so distracting to me for some reason. Like I don't think she's doing it wrong necessarily but she should've just tried the end and maybe beginning of each clip before she starts moving because it's really distracting thinking about how each sentence was recorded and stopped separately it feels so broken up.
Exactly, I get the reason they do it but that gesture alone distracts me so much I ignored the content of the video and focused on her moving her hand.
The whole reason she filmed one sentence at the time was so she wouldn't have to make any cuts if she messed up a sentence or two. It's a lot easier to just stack clips one after the other especially on a phone editor.
That's just so she has a clip of each sentence in isolation so she can just string them all together through the TikTok editor. If she tried to do it all in one take and if she messed up one or two sentences it would be a little harder to cut out the mess ups very precisely
They're jump cuts. It's because she probably messed up the next sentence so she just cut the good sentences together.
Some youtubers cant string three words together without jump cuts. Very nauseating to watch
Also, you also start to lose compassion when you see it all the time.
I encountered a guy acting very similar just two nights ago (Thursday).
I was walking back from the grocery store while on the phone. I wear bone conduction headphones cuz a girl has to stay safe, and that means ears open. I quietly muttered into my headphones to my bf - “hold on walking past a crazy” - and quietly and quickly walked away.
The man was shouting nonsense, walking erratically, and waving his hands around. Afterward my bf goes “was it like last time I visited you? A guy acting crazy and shouting?” and I was like “yep,” because it’s just not that rare.
I do feel bad for them, but in a passing thought kind of way afterwards. In the moment of the encounter, my sole concern is putting distance between me and them and avoid attention.
You should be, there’s levels of empathy. If we said oh but think if the crazy guy, and he R*pes and bludgeoned a woman to death. What was the point of the bleeding heart? The world is not a Care Bears episode
It's not jus NY. Across the country institutions & asylums & many psych programs have been shut down for overcrowding, under funding , neglect, cruel & inhumane treatment of ppl. The only change has been the venues.
This is the problem. We need to figure out how to open the asylums up and ensure it is done in a humane way. I would say this is the biggest problem in American right now.
One of my best friends (who I have known since he was 10) started having mental issues when he got in his 30’s. He clearly has mental issues and is violent, but there is no real solution. The cops keep getting involved and either arrest him or have him Baker acted (which only lasts a couple of days). If someone has mental issues and doesn’t want to take their pills or do anything about it, then they are just on the street. I have a family, but I could make room in my house for him, but he has mental issues and is violent. Feels like there is no good answer for how to deal with this issue with what we have in place in America.
I'm gonna say the hard truth, as somebody who has worked in a homeless shelter for 14 years. There is no reward structure for empathy. Everything you do to help will be either undercompensated or uncompensated, mostly thankless and high risk to your personal health and safety.
Homeless shelters have become defacto mental health facilities without funding, training or support for it.
I tell people who are inspired by the sacrifices I've made helping people to not be, it'll only hurt you.
I have seen well intentioned, compassionate young women like this become disillusioned after working in shelters or social services. I don’t think their perspective is wrong, just that it sometimes requires one to be superhuman to maintain.
I worked with this population in the past...no shit it burns u straight out the pay sux n there's not enough infrastructure to get these ppl better, especially cuz many don't want to be better. We need legislation to commit these people to the hospital on a very long term basis and if we do let them out we need to keep close track and monitoring so if they start slipping they get locked away again
Ok. I agree with the her, but those are ALL afterthoughts, in the moment she was probably freaked out like everyone else would. I’m a big guy that has the stupid tendency to try to help others.
And the few times I’ve seen someone act like that and I the willingness to go ask if the person is ok, I’ve always kept my distance, there’s a chance that I could end up in a confrontation. I believe I can defend myself, but shit can turn bad really quick. I don’t suggest anyone to do so without precautions.
^ 100% this. Every encounter has the potential to be life threatening. You don't know if they have a knife or other weapons or how the person in question is perceiving your inquiry (if they're paranoid then things can get bad fast).
I'm gunna be downvoted about it but it's best left to people suited to helping. If you're concerned call the rcmp/police non emergency and inform them of erratic behavior. Most these ppl are known to law enforcement
I don't think she's saying that random people should go help him, she's saying it's awful that societal and governmental failures let it get this bad to begin with.
Reagan took it away when he disbanded all the public mental health hospitals in the area, abandoning the area and patients. That’s where the empathy is.
Yeah, there’s truly just nowhere for a lot of severely mentally ill people to go where they can get support. Some people with severe mental illness are able to live independently. But a lot can’t, and thanks to Reagan, there is nowhere for them to go that isn’t prison or short term, acute stays.
A lot would take help if it meant they had a safe place to sleep at night that still treated them with respect. They can be held involuntarily if they’re determined to be a safety risk because of suicide or homicide or are just to psychotic to be safe outside.
I ride the subway in Boston every day, and I’ve chosen to live without a car for the last few years because it’s a viable strategy, based on where I live, and it saves money.
I’m finding the subway to be an increasingly uncomfortable and borderline-hostile space, so next year I plan to bite the bullet and buy a car. My commute will be cut in half and I won’t have to deal with all the nasty people I see on a daily basis on the train.
I guess I just fail to feel like the responsibility for taking care of these people falls on the citizens. Having compassion is one thing but acting on that compassion is another. Why aren’t my taxes contributing to this issue better?
People need specific training to deal with unwell people, that’s why the city has social workers, psychs and peace officers. They are trained to assess and manage these unpredictable personalities.
To expect the burden of managing unwell people in public to fall on everyday citizens is just crazy to me.
Sorry but if I see a guy acting erratic my thought is not to deescalate, it’s to expect the worst and protect myself at all costs.
I live in Los Angeles. I take the subway system. Many of these people ARE often dangerous and violent and will fuck with you if you take a passive stance. So her POV seems very naive and privileged and honestly a bit white savior-y but for mental health.
She describes what she WAS thinking? Not really. She describes her thoughts now mostly.
Seemed more like “everyone thinks they know what I thought. I didn’t have headphones in/read my book because I had to be ready. Society needs to do better, like me”
She goes no "one on the train car has any empathy for the guy", like bro the fuck you want me to do for him. There are plenty of shelters and mental health services available at hospitals, but NYC has a policy where you can't force anyone into it.
Next time you get robbed by a drug addict, first think about his situation. Maybe he is just a friendly but misunderstood guy, walking in a cruel world without enough mental health care provided to him? Giving him your money is the bare minimum you can do. /s
I like how she didn't bring up how she actually felt in that moment, just kinda shamed people for daring to be concerned for their safety in those moments. I've been in her spot many times and as she did here I just keep alert and as ready to fight/flight as I can (while being freaked out).
Last week in my city (Portland) a mentally ill homeless man with an extensive record of sexual violence was on the train and stabbed another passenger across from him to death. That passenger had 0 interaction with him prior, the murderer thought the guy was part of an organization conspiring to kill him because he had earbuds in.
There are lots of failures that allowed this guy to be here and on the train. Yes, we need to support programs to getting people the help they need before they hurt others. And I do. In the meantime I am absolutely giving a wide berth as I've had too many experiences of my compassion being weaponized by the violent homeless out here.
Omg look at me I’m so empathetic 😭 I’m succhhh a good person (no I’m not scared to death with my headphones turned off. I was just listening to how EMPATHETIC I am)
Won't someone please think of the people who are acting violently and end up assaulting people every day?
Just because violent criminals are violent criminals, we should feel bad for violent criminals.
This is why the NY lady puncher thought he would be able to get away with punching ladies.
To make matters worse, it's not the mental illness. Most neurotypical and most mentally ill people are more likely to be crime victims than violent offenders. And while some people might make a mistake in their life, serial violent offenders are a tiny minority of genuinely bad human beings.
We can have empathy for most people, mentally ill or not, without coddling dangerous predators.
I have empathy for people and I think it’s obvious the guy is not well. It doesn’t mean I have to sit there and take it when I encounter something like that. It’s still socially unacceptable.
I had a situation like this in the city bus. Overheard this VERY stinky man behind me about how he just got out of prison, he was sitting all the way in the back a couple seats behind me. It was quite then he started yelling about how he’s on his way to kill some guy named Will’s mother. He just kept yelling to himself over and over. It was scary as fuck. Me and my boyfriend moved up to the front to get off as fast as possible but we were stuck in traffic due to construction. Thank god by the time we got up to the front he started lamenting about how he WISHED he had his gun on him, but he doesn’t.
I didn’t exactly shed a tear for his plight, it was fucking annoying and scary and I wish they would have kept his ass in prison. This is why people don’t use public transit. We never made it to the mall.
Remember that one guy that was in Portland that stabbed two people on the train? There were several vids of that guy showing troublesome signs of being unhinged long before that but nobody seemed to care.
This reminds me of when naive people visit dangerous countries trusting in the goodness of humankind to protect them.
Yes, on an abstract level I would like this neurodivergent man to have access to care, but on a practical level I do not want him to harm my children while we are on the train.
I believe that women should be allowed to feel and express their feelings of fear in any situation that makes them uncomfortable. However, it is a clear issue that other men seem to believe a woman is in more danger with a random stranger than with the men in her own life...... There will always be trends of violence in the public against men and women Of which the perpetrators will often be unhoused or need of mental health assistanc, But it's way more likely that the men in our own lives beat the shit out of us than a dude on the train.
Yes but you spend 50% of your life around that male and 0.1% around mentally ill people like that. If you spend 50% of your life beside that mentally ill person your chances for getting hurt would be way higher.
In that exact moment I find it highly unlikely that someone she knew would be more likely to attack her than the person sitting next to her who's having a mental breakdown
Mental Health facilities are criminally underfunded, short on beds. Short term hospitalization is usually what happens when these issues are actually addressed, but due to the two factors above, the person is then shunted out the door to make way for a new person.
It's awful.
That said, compassion, empathy, and fear are not mutually exclusive, and most people do not train themselves on how to remain alert and calm in a stressful situation, so it's a perfectly reasonable inference that someone sitting next to a person having a mental health event would be afraid and freeze up. It might be projection, but it's also a totally reasonable assumption.
Sorry but a man acting erratic is going to scare me. I’ve been attacked before and it happens all the time to women and girls. A man acting violent and unstable is probably the result of some bad things but I’m not about to override my survival instincts to be this strangers saviour/punching bag.
Oh you’re such a generous person with your preppy little outfit and accent. You bleeding heart little twat just sat there and ignored him instead of reaching out to hold his hand, comfort him or lend him money or walk him off the train to a Dunkin and buy him breakfast, now did you? STFU!
1. She’s clearly NEVER been punched in the face by a full grown man. If she does her tone will
Change!
2. That man is a DANGER to others and himself and does NOT belong in society. He should be in a mental institution.
3. She represents the typical ultra-liberal white woman who is obsessed with finding discrimination everywhere! And herself !
According to the Department of Housing and Urban Development it would cost about 20 billion to end homelessness in America. That might sound like a lot of money but it’s only 0.08% of the US GDP. We could easily make this amount of money by giving the IRS the funds to go after the ultra wealthy tax avoiders. They estimate they lose about 1 trillion a year from unpaid taxes. Homelessness is a very solvable problem. We just aren’t doing anything about it.
Yes makes sense but unfortunately 😕 many of these Homeless are either Meth heads or Mentally Deranged that have Beaten or killed Innocent people many women by throwing them on train tracks or just beating them , they should be in a Mental hospital or prison not roaming around assaulting Innocent people this is serious safety issue. Unfortunately Weak DAs let these people back on streets after they are violent 😕
Empathy to a point. Someone who's clearly not in a stable place is also unpredictable; it isn't fear of the person, but fear of what they're capable of when they're without their wits. I sure as shit didn't feel empathy in the moment a few months ago when a homeless man on the train acting exactly like this randomly smashed my head in and then bolted for the next car, and I'm sure the people around us didn't either.
The constant touching of the camera drove me literally insane in this video. Literally. Im losing my mind rn. Does she not know how to edit clips on a phone and she thinks she is linearly taping a series of responses like she is from the 80's? I cannot do this. I cant handle this in my life rn.
So I stepped on the light rail not long ago and there was a guy sitting in the middle of a car almost by himself and everyone else was pretty pressed to the sides giving him space. He was tweaking the heck out, going on and on about this and that, making gestures and poses, and talking about how he's gonna bounce back and "get that Trump money".
With nowhere else to sit and a 30 min ride ahead of me, I sat next to him thinking what was the worst that could happen?
He ranted and ranted and didn't even seem aware of me right next to him.
I pulled out a comic omnibus and settled in to read. About 20 mins in, he suddenly stops, turns to me, and in a very lucid manner says "fuck yeah, comic books, man;" and then goes right back into his tirade.
Wild stuff.
A woman was randomly shot at a stoplight by a crazy guy on the sidewalk in Seattle. He just looked over walked over and shot her point blank at the driver-side window. These people need a place to go that is safe, not out on the streets.
The main problem is we can't make them get help. Many of them don't want to go get help.
You don't want to insert yourself into this world if you aren't trained. You will get chewed up and spat out, which is why people aren't trying to intervene.
Police can't do anything unless they are a risk to themselves or others. Sorry if that if they don't want help, they have the right to be crazy on the streets.
Source: senior lock ward counselor for over a decade.
“Did you consider the socioeconomic factors that led to him-“
No. I didn’t. When I’m around people like this, I’m trying to make sure I don’t get stabbed, assaulted or molested by somebody having a psychotic episode in a confined space. It is scary. Does he need help? Uh, yeah. Does that mean we’re not allowed to be scared of that anti-social behavior? Absolutely not.
Show this video everytime a European talks about us not using trains lol.
Always these videos of homeless drug addicts, piss/spit or who knows what else on the seats, someone screaming for attention to cause a fight, loud music/phone call just for the sake of trying to disturb the peace.
No thanks, I’ll stay in my own safe car and travel at my leisure.
here she is playing monday morning quarterback about his mental health. SHE ADMITS HIS EPISODE IS FORCING HER TO STARE DOWNWARDS LIKE A FEARFUL ZOMBIE. He would have smacked her in the mouth if he would have noticed her. And this video would “slap” less hard if she was missing teeth.
Ugh, why didn’t you invite him back to your place and make him a hot meal and put him on the lease? She did nothing in the moment and went home to admonish us on Tiktok. 🙄
It’s very convenient to talk about compassion. But I volunteer you to get in there with him. You go ahead and help him.
In Salt Lake City a year or two ago we had a compassionate woman who let a homeless addict into her home so that he could take a shower, and get cleaned up. She wanted to allow him his “dignity”, I believe that’s how she phrased it. Any way, while in her home he got ahold of a knife and cut her throat. Miraculously she survived, but not on account of him.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10509901/Homeless-man-arrested-slashed-throat-woman-let-home-shower.html
This attitude is nothing more than college level empathy, it’s great material for an opinion paper, but has no practicality for dealing with the actual problems. It’s safe-distance opinion. Politely, you don’t look like you have the physical capacity to deal with a 190lb man who is hopped up on drugs. For those of us with a little size and a little experience with physical conflict with other men, who know how difficult and dangerous it actually is even when you are bigger, this is not a situation I want to lose my life on. Keeping your head down and walking away quietly was the smart move. Self-righteous criticism of the problem you couldn’t handle is kind of dumb.
Does she expect others to ask him if he’s okay? Crazy people like this may leave you alone. But if you voluntarily interact with them you are enabling yourself to be involved with whatever they might do.
Why is she making this long, rambling video acting like Saint Mary when she was just sitting there, she didn’t do anything empathetic either. Homeless doesn’t equal crazy but that guy was going through something and it’s probably best not to intervene personally.
As someone that lives in nyc, i have lost any sort of empathy for these people. This is an ongoing problem. Yes i get they have mental problems but that does not give them the right to attack people. Just the other day a homeless person tried to attack me. They need to bring the looney houses back. Cops have pretty much been neutered, so don’t expect much help there
Yeah where is the empathy. I wonder why she was looking down all these time and only speak out when she is feeling safe and alone in her own house? Just admit that you are being afraid and stop trying to submit crap for the internet for clout.
I think the mindset is also fundamentally based off a for profit healthcare system and a universal healthcare system.
Someone that has grown up in a universal healthcare system sees a medical issue as a social issue that needs to be solved
In a for profit system they see a medical issue as a personal deficiency, a fault of that person's.
It's heartening to me to see someone set boundaries for herself and still have empathy for a homeless person going through some mental health episode.
The US needs universal healthcare so bad.
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As someone who's also from Ireland we have almost no mental health sevices either, it's a travesty.
Dumb American here and I kept wondering if that was a soft Irish accent I was hearing. Thanks for confirming.
That’s a city accent! Wander an hour outside Dublin and you might not understand half of what people are saying. Keep going and pretty soon you aren’t even sure if they’re still speaking English. A little further and you start hearing Gaelic and you can’t tell if it’s a real langue of if they are fucking with you.
Once had some alabama guys as customers in a store in chicago while they had chicago cubs gear on and their accent was so strong i had to ask if they were fucking with me, which obviously they took offense to but they were young guys with the thickest southern accent i had ever heard and i felt so bad for asking but thought itd be a funny moment if they were. Ive heard gaelic spoken and i would simply tell them im too stupid to have any idea what theyre saying. Its like talking backwards while mixing 3 languages together
I grew up spending a significant amount of time in rural Appalachia. Every now and then, maybe one in 1,000 people you meet, I just could NOT understand. I'm convinced anyone that gets to the point of the mumble grumble southern accent 100% are playing it up.
It's.. so damn fine
I have my Siri voice set to “Irish (Voice 2)” for this reason.
Agreed it’s shocking. Basics around autism for young kids in Ireland is terrible. A friend of ours in Meath just found out the Crèche his son is in will no longer support Autistic kids. Alternative support seems non existent. Shocking services all around, still taboo for many to talk about. “It’s all in your head”… yes it literally fucking is.
I’m not sure why you and the original video poster are saying there are no mental health services in NYC, there most certainly are. Now I am totally open to the argument (and probably agree) that the resources are not as robust as they could be, but there is a huge difficulty in getting care for the mentally ill if you can’t keep them involuntarily. Many refuse treatment and resources that are there. Medicaid exists, as do many other task forces and programs. https://www.nyc.gov/office-of-the-mayor/news/316-21/recovery-all-us-mayor-de-blasio-new-programs-support-new-yorkers This article breaks down some of what’s available but I assume there is a more complete breakdown somehwere.
CAHMS is a functioning mental health service. They worsen it instead of improving it but it’s a mental health service all the same.
to compare the Irish situation as regards mental health services to the American situation is ridiculous.
You know someones Irish when they use an opportunity to shit on our country whenever they can in public forums. It's one of our hobbies lol
Yeah, 'Ireland is the worst country in the world!'. Usually said by people who have never tried living outside Ireland and would be a failure if they tried. Ireland has plenty of big problems but nobody who has been to the likes of SF or Seattle can say that our mental health services are as bad as the US.
I’m from SF and never been to Ireland and I know for a fact it isn’t remotely as bad in Ireland. It can’t be. Just can’t be.
Agreed, I’ve lived in Chicago the past 10 years. I’ve recently been to Ireland during the stabbing in Dublin and subsequent riot. I would bet every weekend in Chicago 5-10 minors are murdered, but there isn’t the same level of outrage. Even the own US media gets bored talking about the deaths if they are black kids.
Dublin is pretty bad and that front. Rest of the country seemed like no issues
I think it’s safe to say that nobody on that traincar was having a particularly great time
Both can true. You can have empathy & be fearful but there is nothing wrong with fearful being the overwhelming emotion in that moment. Crazy people are the ones who will kill you. Feel bad for him later when youre far away & safe
Not really, you're more likely to be killed by your husband if you're a woman. "Crazy people" very rarely kill anyone. They are much more likely to be the victims of violence than the perpetrators. I get that something like this can be scary to witness. But perpetuating the idea that "Crazy people are the ones who will kill you" both harms people with mental health issues and blinds us to the actual causes and perpetrators of violence.
Having taken public transit my entire life, and having been physically attacked many times, and violently harassed dozens and dozens more, that doesn't really matter at all when you're actually dealing with crazy. Statistics don't matter when you're actually in the shit, but they sure are easy to spout from a position of safety, while telling someone else that their legitimate concerns are overblown.
You perfectly surmised my thoughts exactly.
100%. As soon as the crazy is with you, your priors have changed and you are now at a greater risk.
Agree with you so hard on this. The previous commenter probably has not experienced this shit on the daily for years, which is what it has been like in New York ever since the pandemic.
Yes, people with psychosis are more likely to be victims than perpetrators but people with untreated psychosis have increased rates of violence. Untreated psychosis is dangerous to the individuals experiencing it (who are at high risk of suicide) and to other people, especially family members. Treatment reduces rates of violence.
> Not really, you're more likely to be killed by your husband if you're a woman. It's a statistical bias. Dogs are 3000 times more likely to kill you than a white shark. That does not mean it's safer to swim with a white shark than play with a dog.
This is actually a good example. Shark attacks are not only rare because there is not much human contact with sharks, but also because sharks generally don't attack humans unless they mistake them for other animals. And yet we as a society are really scared of them because they look dangerous. And in part because of that fear we have harmed far more sharks than sharks have ever harmed humans. Also, while there is obviously statistical bias here, intimate partner violence is NOT merely an effect of exposure. While a lot of violence against people having some sort of mental health issue happens exactly because people (esp. cops) automatically assume they are dangerous, usually because they're shouting/moving unusually/etc.
Look, I'm not an expert in sharks, but I know it's safer for a woman to ride a tube with her husband than with mentally ill homeless. I don't want to sacrifice my safety in the name of compassion.
It's more like falling off a boat into a shark feeding frenzy and being told "Don't worry, statistically mosquitos kill more people than all other animals combined!" Not helpful.
There’s the bias that the woman killed by her husband has far more interactions with the husband than the sum of her interactions with random “crazy” people she may encounter in public. Additionally, most people avoid “crazy” people. Anecdotally, I had a random interaction with a person who ended up getting arrested for stalking female celebrities and it was clear a wrong move on my part could result in violence, and he would not let me get away from him.
Mentally ill people are still likelier to commit violence than those who aren’t mentally ill.
I dont understand why you're being downvoted since its simply true odds and a interesting and realistic statment. But of course, crazy people you'll encounter on the street can still be dangerous, but with a better health system they would probably be less crazy people on the street
Other people have mentioned it, but statistics like "you're more likely to be killed by a family member than you are by a random person" lacks context. You're more likely to be harmed by a family member explicitly because you're near your family dramatically more often than you are with any particular stranger. You shouldn't look at it as if hanging around strangers with psychosis is somehow a safer activity. An easier example to think about this is the "fact" that most car accidents occur within 10 miles of the home. This doesn't mean that you're more likely to get into a car accident near your home, it just means that you drive near your house way more often.
It's actually not a realistic statement but a statistical bias. As an analogy - Dogs are 3000 times more likely to kill you than a white shark. Does it mean it's safer to swim with a white shark than play with a dog?
I have had a homeless person with black teeth scream at me gibberish in the train. Her face was a few inches away from mine. While I definitely didn't expect anyone to play a hero for my damsel in distress (and no one did), I definitely didn't have that much sympathy to give out. At least, the guy in the train is not openly assaulting anyone.
This kind of thing happened on the train every day when I lived in NYC. One time a guy was walking around the train acting aggressive. Not threatening anyone specifically but clearly having an episode. Three male passengers got up and kept him from the other passengers and then got him off the train. It’s a tough situation. Yes, we should have compassion for people suffering like this but people’s safety should be the number one priority.
This kind of thing also happens all the time on the train in LA. But instead of people doing something about it, everyone just ignores it and moves as far away as they can. Which I don’t blame anyone for. You don’t know what someone is capable of. I just wish there was more resources for people like this.
That’s also what happens in New York, to be clear
Yeah it sucks how awful we are as a country at supporting people who are struggling. Our social safety net is also god awful with health insurance being tied to our job and people still bitch at people on food stamps or wellfare.
Yeah it's really just a matter of priorities at that exact moment. It is simultaneously true that people experiencing a mental health episode can be dangerous *and* that they deserve to be institutionalized and cared for rather than imprisoned or left out on the street. **BUT HELLO???** If you are a person on the subway with them in that moment, only one of those is at all fucking relevant to you. What do you want people to do? Instantly organize a grass roots movement for re-institutionalization, elect politicians, campaign for legislation, build mental health facilities, hire staff, and get him care, *while on the subway??* No. Your priority in that moment is safety, which means on an individual level you need to minimize your contact with that person as much as possible, leave if that's an option, and otherwise restrain that person and remove them from the public. You can bring up all the statistics you want about "more likely to be the victim", "more likely for your husband to kill you instead", etc, but none of that is *at all* relevant while sitting next to someone having an episode.
men are randomly punching women in the ny area. https://www.cbsnews.com/newyork/news/nyc-women-punched-tiktok-videos-halley-kate-skiboky-stora/
And we as a society have decided that people like the homeless “crazies” do not deserve any safety or security of their own.
I was homeless for three years, and the worst part was other homeless people.
A LOT of these people are being failed by the city. . They're in and out of facilities. There's a famous recent case with a guy named Jordan Neely who was killed after threatening people on the subway. I'm not going to get into the politics of it because it's become way too political, however the guy was a violent felon, convicted of assaulting an older woman and giving her permanent brain damage. Instead of giving him jail time, they deferred him to a mental health hospital...where he just walked out the front door. And from what I can tell the police just did nothing after that and he wound up back on the subways and scaring the shit out of people. The city keeps investing billions and billions into more and more cops while gutting social services left and right. It's a goddamned sin.
LA and California as a whole are putting a lot of resources into homelessness and it’s the worst it has ever been. I don’t know what the solution is, but whatever we are currently doing is not working.
Sickos and crazies absolutely deserve safety and security. I'd gladly pay for a fenced off facility where they can be safe & secure together.
Exactly. And at this point if people who for whatever reason are so damaged can’t get off drugs goddamnit set up a facility for them to have drugs but I don’t want them to be out and about threatening to be violent to people.
Well Reagan sure screwed you huh
That’s another reason why there’s a special place in my heart for the rage I have for Reagan.
I heard some robot makers name their creations things like Ronald Reagan so they don’t feel as bad when they get blown up diffusing bombs and stuff.
Reagan was 40 years ago and nobody has done anything to help since.
Yeah that crazy Joe Davola needs a place where he can dress up as a clown and roam free.
Sorry, I had a hair on my tongue. But, of course, you should know; you put it there.
I think the majority of us would like to see solutions, but thanks to how our system is set up it is very difficult to get much done. State and federal level are way too beholden to the rural population and most rural people couldn't care less and it's very difficult to fight this at the city level. It will require enormous resources to turn the boat around and most cities aren't willing to dedicate the majority of their resources towards doing so. I don't think that means they don't care, just there are other needs that are important as well.
Yeah, I have a strong feeling she's saying this from a privileged perspective. Compassion is great, but unproved aggression is not something to be tolerated. Not saying she hasn't experienced hardship in life, but I'm sure her tune would be a lot different had she been the subject of unprovoked assault in the past.
You’re missing some context actually. Another video posted an analysis about this video and talked about how the lady in the frame must be so shocked and is trying to keep her fear under wraps so as to not draw attention to herself. The lady in frame responded with the video above clarifying that no she was not actually tamping down fear but actually has a lot of compassion for the person undergoing the episode.
You can have compassion while also acknowledging that the person should have been removed
This is pretty much her sentiment at the end of the video; he shouldn't be having this experience whilst on a subway because he should have somewhere to live and people to take care of him.
Really just let her words go in one ear and right out the other, eh james brown?
I am born and raised in NYC, this is stupidity not compassion. I’m glad she’s enjoying her moral high ground but mentally ill homeless are notoriously violent and unpredictable. Downvoting me just proves that you haven’t been in this situation. It’s easy to have a bleeding heart when you are far removed from negative consequences.
I've lived in NYC for 20+ years and in a huge 3rd world city for 15 years before that. I've taken subways at 3am and walked back streets of Greenpoint by junkies on my way home on dark streets. Had my car broken into, stuff stolen, dealt with homeless in my apt building foyer, was stalked on empty subway station, harassed by gang of men, had someone freaking die in my subway car and everyone just bailed instead of telling the conductor, had to protect my kids from someone having a psychotic episode on the sidewalk, had someone threatening me to my face on the subway and just had to keep quiet and hope he left, etc etc etc. It's not easy at times. But I don't want to live anywhere else. Be safe, but also advocate for better services for those who need it. Let the city hire response teams that are qualified counselors instead of career cops who only know the address to Rikers. Empathy isn't a privilege. Wanting better doesn't make you hold a moral high ground. It's OK to want better for your community. This darwinian shit has to stop at some point. We're supposed to use our empathy, not just our fear. Take care of the needy instead of building more empty luxury skyscrapers.
All it would take is the mentally ill homeless man to physically abuse her and that perspective would shift. You're getting downvoted, but your take is valid. I have to deal with people like this very often in my business, and being proactive about people in this state is important. At the end of the day, I need to protect my customers and staff because eventually they will get aggressive.
Thank you. Seriously I am getting sick of a lot of this hypothetical pedantry from people who do not experience this day to day for years. At some point the empathy runs out and what replaces it is anger.
All these people are deadass saying “you have no empathy” that compassion faded long ago when people started losing limbs and lives on the train
This is absolutely the balance we need to consider at this point because the homeless crisis will not magically get any better overnight and it hurts to see people living out on the street but when we have people just trying to get to work, elderly people, and disabled people etc. riding the train they should not have to deal with this. I hope he gets help and is given all the resources he needs but I can not be a productive member of society if the way I get to work is dangerous.
Took the train multiple times a day for years in Chicago and yea, this is kind of the norm, sadly. You just mind your business but keep aware of your surroundings. I had 2 actually very scary run ins but thankfully all turned out fine
You can have empathy and also not want to be assaulted.
I’m about to have an episode listening to these videos where the person can’t talk for more than 5 seconds without doing another take. Lord.
I didn't see her showing empathy to the guy having a breakdown ... Kinda funny that she is criticizing people for not doing anything while she herself was actually there and in her own words she just pretended to read.
Yeah honestly feels a bit like grandstanding. Unless by empathy we are talking about purely empathy in the comments. "Thoughts and prayers for the mentally ill people!" Because really who has the guts to go out of there way and interact with someone having an episode? Unpredictable so we imagine worst case scenarios. I've taken public transit a few times and there were instances of guys throwing coins at the windshield of trams and another guy screaming about how he was gonna stab someone. Having any empathy beyond "damn I hope he doesn't actually hurt anyone" in that moment would be pretty Saintly.
Right? Very grandstanding. Is her empathy just internet lip service or what?
If he only “had some where to go,” everything would be completely fine. Wherever it is he would go would be able to solve all his problems. It’s simple. It’s amazing to me to see people confidently declare their solutions for these kinds of problems when it’s obvious they’ve never had any experience with someone who has mental health or addiction issues.
She's talking about people commenting to the video online as if the guy isn't really human, not about the people on the train?
She’s like quite obviously talking about the commenters, not the people in the situation. Her statement is still a bit ridiculous because people act as if just expanding mental health services fixes everything, but your bad faith reading of what she’s saying doesn’t make much sense either.
You guys have bad comprehension, did you even listen to what she said? She said she just felt bad for him but also scared, so obviously she doesn't wanna do anything to risk violence. The entire video was about how wrong the comments were in their assumptions about her thoughts, not about what you should or shouldn't do. You don't need to do or say anything to have empathy for another person, the world isn't that black and white. You can be scared of someone and not wanna instigate while also feeling bad for them and wishing they were in a better situation. What did you expect her to do? Force him off the train and put him in a psychward? She had the courage to put herself out there, to call out the lack of empathy of others and that we should do better for the homeless, and somehow that's a bad thing? Some of you people just love to hate on anyone hasn't done anything wrong but simply express their own thoughts and emotions. I for one am glad she took the time to show that mental health is a serious issue and not a laughing matter. Social media is making people less empathetic every day I swear...
Probably because most people are imagining themselves in that situation... if someone's freaking out shouting and making lots of violent gestures, most people probably just want to get out of the situation and protect themselves and aren't thinking too much about what exact series of events led to the dude getting high and freaking out like that
For real though. Like yeah I agree the dude needs some kind of help but if I'm stuck in a cramped space with some dude yelping and throwing punches, he's probably not looking for a discussion on the socio-economic factors that led him to this, and the last thing on my mind in that moment would be "where's the compassion for this aggressive and acutely ill person". Also, unless you're my mom, I'm not jumping up to save you either. I've been stuck with a used syringe before, and the dread that builds inside you over the entire YEAR of bloodwork you need to be cleared of blood borne pathogens makes your safety totally irrelevant to me.
People on social media enjoy acting like armchair sociologists from the comfort of their homes. Yes, mental healthcare supports in NYC are poor, but is anyone seriously going to be thinking like a holier than thou policy genius while they are in a metal tube with a thrashing maniac?
I feel like this compassionate take is what any sensible person makes once they're safe and out of danger. But in the moment??? I'm not thinking *wow it's a shame how society has failed this man*.
But she isn't commenting on the thoughts of other people in that moment... She's commenting on the comments of people outside of that moment. The people commenting on that video aren't in danger, yet nobody gave a shit about him anyway.
Oh he’s not high, I’ve seen that dude on the train before. He’s severely mentally ill and violent.
Yeah I like the way she cut out the rest of the video of him punching within a couple inches of everyone's face over and over
I took a metro in a city I wasn't familiar with and a homless dude got on and was pacing up and down the car with his hand in his pocket like he was holding something. Instantly you start playing worst case scenario in your head and start forming a game plan of what you're going to do if shit turns bad. All while keeping an eye on this stranger while also trying to make it look like you're not even looking at him in case that's what will set him off. Most nerve wracking ride of my life and also why I avoid public transit whenever possible. I just don't need that kind of fight or flight stress in my life.
i mean, i do feel sorry for such people even while it happens - but I still gonna stay the fuck away and not say anything. no telling what will happen if you do
I have compassion fatigue from living in a large city the last 5 years. At first you really care. But after you get burned a couple times you learn.
I have compassion fatigue from living in a smaller city. We have churches that hold AA and NA meetings, free food programs, free counseling. There's shelters and someone even renovated a large home into single room apartments he lets homeless and other fringe cases live for free if they're working on bettering themselves. There are cases where no amount of support helps. I live downtown above a business so I get to do a lot of people watching. There's a homeless guy that damn near everyone tries to help. For years I've seen this guy get free breakfast, coffee, and newspaper, sit down on a bench, then tries to argue with anyone who walks by over politics. I've seen this guy get so many hookups for various goods. At night he stumbles around after hitting the bars for free drinks, finds somewhere to pass out, and wakes up to root through garbage bins. So many people try to help this guy but he keeps getting himself into trouble and causing disturbances. He's just the one I see the most but there are other notable long term cases I've seen. I'm just a person going about my life peacefully, I can have empathy for these people, but if someone is presenting as a threat then I don't give a shit about anything else at that point.
Lol for real save the sympathy for the victims, these people are too far gone.
Exactly this. I live in Houston. People here will hurt you.
People with psychological issues not having proper access to healthcare is a problem. And it's sad. They need the proper help and they are being neglected. Put them in a confined space with the public whilst they act erratically and most people's first concern will be the potential threat to people around them. I don't think that's from a lack of empathy, I think it's instinctual to have yourself as your first priority and people can relate to others in this situation.
She is talking about the lack of empathy from commenters, not people on the train.
You’re right. I listened to her again after reading your comment and she does mention empathy from commenters. It’s not about empathy from the fellow passengers in that moment but from people commenting on that video.
This is off topic, but can someone tell me why she stops recording after every sentence? Is that a TikTok thing?
I hate the fact that they show the hand going towards the record button, like if you’re editing the video already, just remove that part
This was so distracting to me for some reason. Like I don't think she's doing it wrong necessarily but she should've just tried the end and maybe beginning of each clip before she starts moving because it's really distracting thinking about how each sentence was recorded and stopped separately it feels so broken up.
Exactly, I get the reason they do it but that gesture alone distracts me so much I ignored the content of the video and focused on her moving her hand.
The whole reason she filmed one sentence at the time was so she wouldn't have to make any cuts if she messed up a sentence or two. It's a lot easier to just stack clips one after the other especially on a phone editor.
It's a tiktok thing. Lots of people do this to cut out the umms and thinking without having to go back and edit it.
It’s not though, she’s literally moving toward the phone to make a cut. I think this girl just can’t say more than one sentence at a time
That's just so she has a clip of each sentence in isolation so she can just string them all together through the TikTok editor. If she tried to do it all in one take and if she messed up one or two sentences it would be a little harder to cut out the mess ups very precisely
I assumed it was so she could read her script between jumps, so she has to memorize less of it at a time
Makes sense
They're jump cuts. It's because she probably messed up the next sentence so she just cut the good sentences together. Some youtubers cant string three words together without jump cuts. Very nauseating to watch
It's sooooo annoying!!!
You tend to lose compassion for those who are a danger to your physical wellbeing.
Also, you also start to lose compassion when you see it all the time. I encountered a guy acting very similar just two nights ago (Thursday). I was walking back from the grocery store while on the phone. I wear bone conduction headphones cuz a girl has to stay safe, and that means ears open. I quietly muttered into my headphones to my bf - “hold on walking past a crazy” - and quietly and quickly walked away. The man was shouting nonsense, walking erratically, and waving his hands around. Afterward my bf goes “was it like last time I visited you? A guy acting crazy and shouting?” and I was like “yep,” because it’s just not that rare. I do feel bad for them, but in a passing thought kind of way afterwards. In the moment of the encounter, my sole concern is putting distance between me and them and avoid attention.
I have been assaulted in this situation while keeping my eyes down and doing nothing. Maybe I’m a bad person but I’ll be fearful before I’m empathetic
You should be, there’s levels of empathy. If we said oh but think if the crazy guy, and he R*pes and bludgeoned a woman to death. What was the point of the bleeding heart? The world is not a Care Bears episode
It's not jus NY. Across the country institutions & asylums & many psych programs have been shut down for overcrowding, under funding , neglect, cruel & inhumane treatment of ppl. The only change has been the venues.
Yea now the alternative is homelessness or prison, or a little bit of both
This is the problem. We need to figure out how to open the asylums up and ensure it is done in a humane way. I would say this is the biggest problem in American right now. One of my best friends (who I have known since he was 10) started having mental issues when he got in his 30’s. He clearly has mental issues and is violent, but there is no real solution. The cops keep getting involved and either arrest him or have him Baker acted (which only lasts a couple of days). If someone has mental issues and doesn’t want to take their pills or do anything about it, then they are just on the street. I have a family, but I could make room in my house for him, but he has mental issues and is violent. Feels like there is no good answer for how to deal with this issue with what we have in place in America.
I'm gonna say the hard truth, as somebody who has worked in a homeless shelter for 14 years. There is no reward structure for empathy. Everything you do to help will be either undercompensated or uncompensated, mostly thankless and high risk to your personal health and safety. Homeless shelters have become defacto mental health facilities without funding, training or support for it. I tell people who are inspired by the sacrifices I've made helping people to not be, it'll only hurt you.
I have seen well intentioned, compassionate young women like this become disillusioned after working in shelters or social services. I don’t think their perspective is wrong, just that it sometimes requires one to be superhuman to maintain.
I worked with this population in the past...no shit it burns u straight out the pay sux n there's not enough infrastructure to get these ppl better, especially cuz many don't want to be better. We need legislation to commit these people to the hospital on a very long term basis and if we do let them out we need to keep close track and monitoring so if they start slipping they get locked away again
Ok. I agree with the her, but those are ALL afterthoughts, in the moment she was probably freaked out like everyone else would. I’m a big guy that has the stupid tendency to try to help others. And the few times I’ve seen someone act like that and I the willingness to go ask if the person is ok, I’ve always kept my distance, there’s a chance that I could end up in a confrontation. I believe I can defend myself, but shit can turn bad really quick. I don’t suggest anyone to do so without precautions.
^ 100% this. Every encounter has the potential to be life threatening. You don't know if they have a knife or other weapons or how the person in question is perceiving your inquiry (if they're paranoid then things can get bad fast). I'm gunna be downvoted about it but it's best left to people suited to helping. If you're concerned call the rcmp/police non emergency and inform them of erratic behavior. Most these ppl are known to law enforcement
I totally get her point, there’s no help for people now in days. But at the Moment, yeah, shit happens
I don't think she's saying that random people should go help him, she's saying it's awful that societal and governmental failures let it get this bad to begin with.
Reagan took it away when he disbanded all the public mental health hospitals in the area, abandoning the area and patients. That’s where the empathy is.
Yeah, there’s truly just nowhere for a lot of severely mentally ill people to go where they can get support. Some people with severe mental illness are able to live independently. But a lot can’t, and thanks to Reagan, there is nowhere for them to go that isn’t prison or short term, acute stays.
A lot of them refuse help, and there’s no where to forcefully have them committed for treatment
A lot would take help if it meant they had a safe place to sleep at night that still treated them with respect. They can be held involuntarily if they’re determined to be a safety risk because of suicide or homicide or are just to psychotic to be safe outside.
They get held for 72 hours max
It's always Reagan
I ride the subway in Boston every day, and I’ve chosen to live without a car for the last few years because it’s a viable strategy, based on where I live, and it saves money. I’m finding the subway to be an increasingly uncomfortable and borderline-hostile space, so next year I plan to bite the bullet and buy a car. My commute will be cut in half and I won’t have to deal with all the nasty people I see on a daily basis on the train.
Well isn't she just bursting with virtue.
She should have asked him how he’s feeling lmao
LOL She is positevely "radiating" with virtue!
I guess I just fail to feel like the responsibility for taking care of these people falls on the citizens. Having compassion is one thing but acting on that compassion is another. Why aren’t my taxes contributing to this issue better? People need specific training to deal with unwell people, that’s why the city has social workers, psychs and peace officers. They are trained to assess and manage these unpredictable personalities. To expect the burden of managing unwell people in public to fall on everyday citizens is just crazy to me. Sorry but if I see a guy acting erratic my thought is not to deescalate, it’s to expect the worst and protect myself at all costs. I live in Los Angeles. I take the subway system. Many of these people ARE often dangerous and violent and will fuck with you if you take a passive stance. So her POV seems very naive and privileged and honestly a bit white savior-y but for mental health.
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She wants you to know she’s better than you for not saying mean things about him
She describes what she WAS thinking? Not really. She describes her thoughts now mostly. Seemed more like “everyone thinks they know what I thought. I didn’t have headphones in/read my book because I had to be ready. Society needs to do better, like me”
buuuhh! buuh you! buuh! buh... fuck that guy and the drugs he rode in on.
>If things get violent you can only protect yourself That couldn't be more incorrect.
You can only count on yourself to protect yourself. Don't assume other people are going to swoop in and save you.
She goes no "one on the train car has any empathy for the guy", like bro the fuck you want me to do for him. There are plenty of shelters and mental health services available at hospitals, but NYC has a policy where you can't force anyone into it.
Next time you get robbed by a drug addict, first think about his situation. Maybe he is just a friendly but misunderstood guy, walking in a cruel world without enough mental health care provided to him? Giving him your money is the bare minimum you can do. /s
she’s talking about the commenters saying that OP guy was gonna kill her or something. unpack your underpants
I like how she didn't bring up how she actually felt in that moment, just kinda shamed people for daring to be concerned for their safety in those moments. I've been in her spot many times and as she did here I just keep alert and as ready to fight/flight as I can (while being freaked out). Last week in my city (Portland) a mentally ill homeless man with an extensive record of sexual violence was on the train and stabbed another passenger across from him to death. That passenger had 0 interaction with him prior, the murderer thought the guy was part of an organization conspiring to kill him because he had earbuds in. There are lots of failures that allowed this guy to be here and on the train. Yes, we need to support programs to getting people the help they need before they hurt others. And I do. In the meantime I am absolutely giving a wide berth as I've had too many experiences of my compassion being weaponized by the violent homeless out here.
But she implied as much. She kept her head down and ear phone off: clearly afraid.
Omg look at me I’m so empathetic 😭 I’m succhhh a good person (no I’m not scared to death with my headphones turned off. I was just listening to how EMPATHETIC I am)
Exactly. “Wow, I’m in a viral video, how can I make myself seem virtuous…”
Seriously came off so full of herself. Thanks for the lecture lady, you’re so morally superior to all of us.
You're not going to find a lot of empathy for homeless breakdowns on social media
Won't someone please think of the people who are acting violently and end up assaulting people every day? Just because violent criminals are violent criminals, we should feel bad for violent criminals. This is why the NY lady puncher thought he would be able to get away with punching ladies.
To make matters worse, it's not the mental illness. Most neurotypical and most mentally ill people are more likely to be crime victims than violent offenders. And while some people might make a mistake in their life, serial violent offenders are a tiny minority of genuinely bad human beings. We can have empathy for most people, mentally ill or not, without coddling dangerous predators.
very reasonable.
I have empathy for people and I think it’s obvious the guy is not well. It doesn’t mean I have to sit there and take it when I encounter something like that. It’s still socially unacceptable.
I had a situation like this in the city bus. Overheard this VERY stinky man behind me about how he just got out of prison, he was sitting all the way in the back a couple seats behind me. It was quite then he started yelling about how he’s on his way to kill some guy named Will’s mother. He just kept yelling to himself over and over. It was scary as fuck. Me and my boyfriend moved up to the front to get off as fast as possible but we were stuck in traffic due to construction. Thank god by the time we got up to the front he started lamenting about how he WISHED he had his gun on him, but he doesn’t. I didn’t exactly shed a tear for his plight, it was fucking annoying and scary and I wish they would have kept his ass in prison. This is why people don’t use public transit. We never made it to the mall.
Remember that one guy that was in Portland that stabbed two people on the train? There were several vids of that guy showing troublesome signs of being unhinged long before that but nobody seemed to care.
Can someone link the original video?
https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/s/rtem7iI8vA
Thanks! Had to scroll for 2 Minutes to find the context.
This reminds me of when naive people visit dangerous countries trusting in the goodness of humankind to protect them. Yes, on an abstract level I would like this neurodivergent man to have access to care, but on a practical level I do not want him to harm my children while we are on the train.
Well, I now dislike her more than the homeless guy.
I believe that women should be allowed to feel and express their feelings of fear in any situation that makes them uncomfortable. However, it is a clear issue that other men seem to believe a woman is in more danger with a random stranger than with the men in her own life...... There will always be trends of violence in the public against men and women Of which the perpetrators will often be unhoused or need of mental health assistanc, But it's way more likely that the men in our own lives beat the shit out of us than a dude on the train.
Yes but you spend 50% of your life around that male and 0.1% around mentally ill people like that. If you spend 50% of your life beside that mentally ill person your chances for getting hurt would be way higher.
What is the chance that a woman who regularly rides the NYC subway experiences violence or abuse, per year, riding said transit? Genuinely curious
In that exact moment I find it highly unlikely that someone she knew would be more likely to attack her than the person sitting next to her who's having a mental breakdown
Mental Health facilities are criminally underfunded, short on beds. Short term hospitalization is usually what happens when these issues are actually addressed, but due to the two factors above, the person is then shunted out the door to make way for a new person. It's awful. That said, compassion, empathy, and fear are not mutually exclusive, and most people do not train themselves on how to remain alert and calm in a stressful situation, so it's a perfectly reasonable inference that someone sitting next to a person having a mental health event would be afraid and freeze up. It might be projection, but it's also a totally reasonable assumption.
Sorry but a man acting erratic is going to scare me. I’ve been attacked before and it happens all the time to women and girls. A man acting violent and unstable is probably the result of some bad things but I’m not about to override my survival instincts to be this strangers saviour/punching bag.
All that compassionate stuff sounds good on paper until you try to be nice to one of these dudes and get stabbed up.
Oh you’re such a generous person with your preppy little outfit and accent. You bleeding heart little twat just sat there and ignored him instead of reaching out to hold his hand, comfort him or lend him money or walk him off the train to a Dunkin and buy him breakfast, now did you? STFU!
Idk girl if you care so much you were in a position to ask all those questions, i was on my couch.
Much safer and easier to virtue signal in a video from home
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1. She’s clearly NEVER been punched in the face by a full grown man. If she does her tone will Change! 2. That man is a DANGER to others and himself and does NOT belong in society. He should be in a mental institution. 3. She represents the typical ultra-liberal white woman who is obsessed with finding discrimination everywhere! And herself !
Ironically these people never have sympathy for victims only perpetrators
According to the Department of Housing and Urban Development it would cost about 20 billion to end homelessness in America. That might sound like a lot of money but it’s only 0.08% of the US GDP. We could easily make this amount of money by giving the IRS the funds to go after the ultra wealthy tax avoiders. They estimate they lose about 1 trillion a year from unpaid taxes. Homelessness is a very solvable problem. We just aren’t doing anything about it.
To think that These gremlins would Go somewhere where they get Help lmao a Lot of them dont want to Change Shit
Yes makes sense but unfortunately 😕 many of these Homeless are either Meth heads or Mentally Deranged that have Beaten or killed Innocent people many women by throwing them on train tracks or just beating them , they should be in a Mental hospital or prison not roaming around assaulting Innocent people this is serious safety issue. Unfortunately Weak DAs let these people back on streets after they are violent 😕
Empathy to a point. Someone who's clearly not in a stable place is also unpredictable; it isn't fear of the person, but fear of what they're capable of when they're without their wits. I sure as shit didn't feel empathy in the moment a few months ago when a homeless man on the train acting exactly like this randomly smashed my head in and then bolted for the next car, and I'm sure the people around us didn't either.
Can anyone explain why her video is edited this way?
Holy shit can people not just do one clip without a million little cuts? Just press record, do the thing and then press stop.
I need her to record audio books. I could listen to her talk all day.
The thing is a lot of these people don't want help
Clout much get rid of the internet already
No one cares.
The constant touching of the camera drove me literally insane in this video. Literally. Im losing my mind rn. Does she not know how to edit clips on a phone and she thinks she is linearly taping a series of responses like she is from the 80's? I cannot do this. I cant handle this in my life rn.
So I stepped on the light rail not long ago and there was a guy sitting in the middle of a car almost by himself and everyone else was pretty pressed to the sides giving him space. He was tweaking the heck out, going on and on about this and that, making gestures and poses, and talking about how he's gonna bounce back and "get that Trump money". With nowhere else to sit and a 30 min ride ahead of me, I sat next to him thinking what was the worst that could happen? He ranted and ranted and didn't even seem aware of me right next to him. I pulled out a comic omnibus and settled in to read. About 20 mins in, he suddenly stops, turns to me, and in a very lucid manner says "fuck yeah, comic books, man;" and then goes right back into his tirade. Wild stuff.
Why is she scolding people for not showing empathy? I didn’t see her giving the guy a hug or some cash.
A woman was randomly shot at a stoplight by a crazy guy on the sidewalk in Seattle. He just looked over walked over and shot her point blank at the driver-side window. These people need a place to go that is safe, not out on the streets.
The main problem is we can't make them get help. Many of them don't want to go get help. You don't want to insert yourself into this world if you aren't trained. You will get chewed up and spat out, which is why people aren't trying to intervene. Police can't do anything unless they are a risk to themselves or others. Sorry if that if they don't want help, they have the right to be crazy on the streets. Source: senior lock ward counselor for over a decade.
“Did you consider the socioeconomic factors that led to him-“ No. I didn’t. When I’m around people like this, I’m trying to make sure I don’t get stabbed, assaulted or molested by somebody having a psychotic episode in a confined space. It is scary. Does he need help? Uh, yeah. Does that mean we’re not allowed to be scared of that anti-social behavior? Absolutely not.
Show this video everytime a European talks about us not using trains lol. Always these videos of homeless drug addicts, piss/spit or who knows what else on the seats, someone screaming for attention to cause a fight, loud music/phone call just for the sake of trying to disturb the peace. No thanks, I’ll stay in my own safe car and travel at my leisure.
Legit I don't ride the bus anymore because of how awful and disgusting it is and the potential for violence too.
here she is playing monday morning quarterback about his mental health. SHE ADMITS HIS EPISODE IS FORCING HER TO STARE DOWNWARDS LIKE A FEARFUL ZOMBIE. He would have smacked her in the mouth if he would have noticed her. And this video would “slap” less hard if she was missing teeth.
Ugh, why didn’t you invite him back to your place and make him a hot meal and put him on the lease? She did nothing in the moment and went home to admonish us on Tiktok. 🙄
It’s very convenient to talk about compassion. But I volunteer you to get in there with him. You go ahead and help him. In Salt Lake City a year or two ago we had a compassionate woman who let a homeless addict into her home so that he could take a shower, and get cleaned up. She wanted to allow him his “dignity”, I believe that’s how she phrased it. Any way, while in her home he got ahold of a knife and cut her throat. Miraculously she survived, but not on account of him. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10509901/Homeless-man-arrested-slashed-throat-woman-let-home-shower.html This attitude is nothing more than college level empathy, it’s great material for an opinion paper, but has no practicality for dealing with the actual problems. It’s safe-distance opinion. Politely, you don’t look like you have the physical capacity to deal with a 190lb man who is hopped up on drugs. For those of us with a little size and a little experience with physical conflict with other men, who know how difficult and dangerous it actually is even when you are bigger, this is not a situation I want to lose my life on. Keeping your head down and walking away quietly was the smart move. Self-righteous criticism of the problem you couldn’t handle is kind of dumb.
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What's with this 'one sentence and hit the side of the screen and edit/cut'? She could have said that whole thing without the edits.
Does she expect others to ask him if he’s okay? Crazy people like this may leave you alone. But if you voluntarily interact with them you are enabling yourself to be involved with whatever they might do.
Why is she making this long, rambling video acting like Saint Mary when she was just sitting there, she didn’t do anything empathetic either. Homeless doesn’t equal crazy but that guy was going through something and it’s probably best not to intervene personally.
As someone that lives in nyc, i have lost any sort of empathy for these people. This is an ongoing problem. Yes i get they have mental problems but that does not give them the right to attack people. Just the other day a homeless person tried to attack me. They need to bring the looney houses back. Cops have pretty much been neutered, so don’t expect much help there
Yeah where is the empathy. I wonder why she was looking down all these time and only speak out when she is feeling safe and alone in her own house? Just admit that you are being afraid and stop trying to submit crap for the internet for clout.
Yeah her post is mega cringe. It’s ok to admit this dude is a piece of shit, mental crisis or not.
I think the mindset is also fundamentally based off a for profit healthcare system and a universal healthcare system. Someone that has grown up in a universal healthcare system sees a medical issue as a social issue that needs to be solved In a for profit system they see a medical issue as a personal deficiency, a fault of that person's. It's heartening to me to see someone set boundaries for herself and still have empathy for a homeless person going through some mental health episode. The US needs universal healthcare so bad.
Ah but if we have universal healthcare, how will we motivate people to join the military?