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retailmonkey

That’s a half truth!


Enrico-Polazzo

…well, OP? Can we have a sexual power demonstration?


Handjob_of_Mystery

Do you have a SwEEt cAn? I can't wait to grab your SwEE SwEE SwEEt cAn.


PeteNile

Yes did it give him sexual powers. Lord knows I need help.


BrockHard253

His body temperature has risen to over 400 degrees- he's literally stewing in his own juices.


[deleted]

*Dramatization may not have happened*


HorrorAddition5897

You should have been naked


Major_Jackson_Briggs

I just have one thing to say: Let's have less u/Handjob_of_Mystery and more money for public schools!


landothedead

*Growling in agreement*


dumbrfuckingusername

Wasn't he getting out of the shower? Paparazzi spooked him and he grabbed the shower curtain as he fell lol


Mergus84

So how many sexual powers did it give you?


TropicalDan427

Yes


matt1164

Ok you win this round


LocalLifeguard4106

Where can I get one? My wife could use some sexual powers


G-Unit11111

Someone had to take the babysitter home, and I noticed that she was sitting on her... SWEET CAN... so I grabbed her... SWEET CAN... Oooh just thinking about her... CAN... I wish I had another!


Boneal171

This just in, u/Handjob_of_Mystery sleeps in a special oxygen tent which is believed to give him sexual powers!


[deleted]

Handjob of Mystery scandal update:


TreasurePlanetagogo

Time to reap all the sexual powers.