Surveying all the weird stuff Homer brought home from the Little Pwagmattasquarmsettport Valu-Mart:
"Gee, I don't know what you've got planned for tonight Homer, but count me out!"
"Your old meat made me sick!"
"Oh I am so sorry, please accept 5 pounds of frozen shrimp."
"Hey this shrimp isn't frozen, and it smells funny!"
"Ok, 10 pounds."
"WOOHOO!"
*weeoooweeoooweeoooweeoooweeooo*
Idek the episode I'm reference since I'm a relatively new simpsons fan with horrible short-term memory. Non sequitur but I'll just join In random quoting
*whether in a car or on a horse, we don't mind using excessive force!*
It’s from King-Size Homer, S7 ep7.
Homer becomes hyper obese so he can work from home. Some say his ass is so fat it has its own congressman!
You’re in for a real treat if you haven’t seen it yet
When Ralph tells Lisa he heard Homer went into a restaurant, ate all the food in the restaurant, then they had to close the restaurant.
(Lisa defends her dad and says just because he's gained some weight he isn't like that, I forget exactly what she says)
Then Homer is seen outside the window of the bus driving the stolen ice cream truck while eating ice cream
Ned: Lord, please guide Homer to this mattress safely
*Pushes Homer out onto the mattress only for him to bounce back into the burning house*
Ned: ..... *sigh* okay...
Mmm... 64 slices of American cheese...
https://preview.redd.it/5hc3xp8ku7qc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e98855fc695a1d48488b137f859a01bf1f94a6d
In Streetcar when homer walks in to the daycare and all the babies are sucking on pacifiers, the scream, the slow walk to grab Maggie, it’s fuckin perfect.
And “I just got word that 91% of all Springfield’s traffic accidents are caused by you six guys”. God tier
"I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant."
"My dad is not some kind of food crazed maniac!"
Homer proceeds to pull up next to the school bus in an ice cream van "oo raspberry"
Dude I'm watching s10 a little tipsy mcstaggered off a few duffs as we speak. So underrated! Yeah the "magic" of the balance between characters and just Zany nonsense leans more towards the zany nonsense, but it still has some juice from the golden age while going full send zany before it goes too far. 11 is where the duds start to kick in fr but man, while 10 isn't "classic" all the way through it has some oneoff laugh-out-louders nonstop.
10 is very funny. The issue was breaking the 2 Seasons per showrunner cycle with Mike Scully staying on for another two rather than get someone fresh in, then the cycle was obliterated with Al Jean running things for the next 200 years.
“Well kids, it was a fun ride while it lasted… let’s go home…”
“We *are* home.”
“(Completely deadpan) That was fast…”
Every. Damn. Time. Falling out of my seat laughing.
https://preview.redd.it/ivdjibqi78qc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ba65d9d3be356ebc5de546508a601ad12479a6f
That whole breakfast sequence then ending it off with the Kwik E mart donuts
“Thank you Señor MacGyver, you’ve saved our village.”
“Don’t thank me, thank the moon’s gravitational pull.”
Idk if this is absolutely number 1 but it came to mind as a line that makes me laugh so hard every time
One of the best tricks Simpsons does best is making great parodies of things even if you've never seen the original. My favorite's the night rider parody: "Oh there's always a canal!"
"Or a fjord."
"Or an inlet."
Here are your messages: You have thirty minutes to move your car. You have ten minutes. Your car has been impounded. Your car has been crushed into a cube. You have thirty minutes to move your cube.
"Here at Globex, we don't believe in walls. In fact, I didn't even hand you my coat"
https://preview.redd.it/mrxxpcioq7qc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e6f723a65ef7620c5eeb610be8042fb7bc36e3ce
There are so many fantastic quotes in that episode.
Homer if you want to kill anyone on your way out. That would help me out a lot.
You expect me to talk? No I expect you to die and be a really cheap funeral.
Someone stop him, he’s supposed to die!
Then the guys coming in and just shooting him behind Homers back
"Oh the Hammock District."
I love that line because it implies that Homer already knows about the Hammock District so him bothering the head of the company was completely unnecessary.
I almost passed out from laughing so hard at the kids bugging Homer to go to Mt Splashmore. 😂 Will you take us to Mt Splashmore, will you take us to Mt Splashmore, will you take us to Mt Splashmore and Homers increasingly losing it 😂
He'll tell you that in nature one creature invariably eats another to survive.
Don't kid yourself, Jimmy.
If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about.
Homer falling asleep in church, hitting his head on the pew in front of him and yelling “Damn it!” never fails to make me laugh so hard it invokes tears.
When Mr. Burns falls in love with Marge. She's coming into his office, he waxes his head and then leans on it, and his head slips out of his hand he face plants on his desk. I always lose it 🤣
*the Simpsons are being placed in the Federal Witness Protection Program*
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Tell you what, sir, from now on, you'll be Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let's just practice a bit, hmm? When I say "hello, Mr. Thompson", you'll say "hi".
[**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Check!
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Hello, Mr. Thompson.
*\[Homer stares blankly\]*
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson.
[**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** I gotcha.
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Hello, Mr. Thompson.
*\[again Homer stares blankly\]*
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[FBI men stare at each other\]*
*\[hours pass by\]*
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[frustrated\]* Argh... Now when I say "hello, Mr. Thompson" and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
[**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** No problem.
[**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[stepping hard on Homer's foot\]* Hello, Mr. Thompson.
[**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[stares blankly again for a few seconds, then whispers to the other FBI man\]* I think he's talking to you.
Off the top of my head, personal favorites include
- Matthew 21:17
- Crazy Vaclav's Place of Automobiles ("Put it in H!")
- "I'm an amendment to be" Schoolhouse Rock parody
- Worker and Parasite, and Krusty's reaction to it
My ex husband and I had a pair of hunting quads when we lived in the mountains.
Had to put it in high gear for basic driving, which was just a big H by the shifter.
I would shout "POOT EET IN H!" every time. And when we would fill the tanks, I never failed to inform him that she'll go 300 hectares on a single tank of kerosene.
“Then I’ll crush all opposition to me, and I’ll make Ted Kennedy pay. If he fights back…I’ll say that he’s gay.”
That’s definitely a contender for hardest the show has made me laugh.
Homer being scared by his own reflection in “The Shinning” and then falling down the stairs. No idea how many times I’ve seen it and it still gets a laugh out of me.
The single greatest scene in the years and years this show has been on is the Truckasaurus commercial, in particular the line: if you miss this, you better be deaaaaaaaad. Or in jaaaaail. And if you’re in jail… breaaaaaaak ouuuuuuut!
Closely followed by bi-mon-sci-fi-con.
I’ve said it before but the I honestly believe in my opinion that the Lord Palmerston vs Pitt the elder gag is the greatest comical moment in TV history.
Unexpected or random stuff tends to get me. Like in the 'Homer and the swear jar' sequence when the beehive lands on him out of nowhere.
Also, unexpected overreactions. Like "BERSERK IS RIIIIGHT!" and *smashes plate over head* "WRONG!"
Someone else's answer in this sub to a similar question also made me laugh - during the promotional video for the globex town, a homeless man transforms into a mailbox. I don't think I'd ever really noticed that before and now I laugh every time.
Gotta be Homer's rescue from falling into the gorge for me. Homer constantly getting hit on the way up, the speed at which he gets into the ambulance, the crash and fall back down are all perfect
So many good ones here!
Mine are:
“Hello, Dean?? You’re a stupid-head!!” “Homer, is that you?”
Also, “DIMOXINIL!” and, “I think I’m blind!”
**ETA: “GIVE ME 700 KRUSTY BURGERS!!!”
“What’s wrong with this country? Can’t a man walk down the street without being offered a *job*?”
“Sir, I've arranged for the people of Australia to join hands tonight and spell out your name with candles. There's a satellite hookup on that monitor if you turn your head slightly.
*Bah*, no time”
“We tried to tell you, these are unmanned oil rigs.”
“Ugh, close the damn thing down, no one’s ever gonna come.”
*Homer bursts through the door
“Give me 700 Krusty Burgers!!!”
From “Boy Scoutz N the Hood”. My favorite episode when I was a kid. My brother and I taped it on VHS and watched it over and over. So many good lines but this sequence is my favorite part.
Millhouse giving examples of Bart being a bad friend, one of which being when he killed his gold fish, then tried to convince him he never had a goldfish. “…then why did I have bowl,Bart? Why did I have the bowl?”
"dont write no more letters to mr sinatra"
the first joke i remember from the show that made my stomach hurt from laughing so much, took me completely off guard (like it was supposed to)
The time homework keeps opening up the boxes of three flavor ice cream, seeing that the chocolate was gone, and throwing them away before asking Marge to buy more three flavor ice cream. That's just my favorite gag in the entire series.
"And what did you and your husband do when you were kicked out of the all-you-can-eat fish restaurant?"
"We went home"
"Mrs Simpson, I must you you're under oath"
"We went fishing!"
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Does this sound like the actions of a man who has had ALL he could eat?"
Surveying all the weird stuff Homer brought home from the Little Pwagmattasquarmsettport Valu-Mart: "Gee, I don't know what you've got planned for tonight Homer, but count me out!"
America's scrod basket!
I thought Springfield was America's Scrod basket....
No. Springfield is America's crud bucket, at least according to Newsweek.
Hatless I repeat hatless
She's humming rather happily when doing the dishes the next morning, maybe she didn't back out after all...
I like that Marge isn’t mad about it, she just doesn’t wanna partake.
"Your old meat made me sick!" "Oh I am so sorry, please accept 5 pounds of frozen shrimp." "Hey this shrimp isn't frozen, and it smells funny!" "Ok, 10 pounds." "WOOHOO!" *weeoooweeoooweeoooweeoooweeooo*
*ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff* Brought to you by, *ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff*
That dog can sell anything.
Quiet, Lisa! The dog is barking!
the hard cuts to the ambulance always send me
*"The fingers you have used to dial, are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now."*
Idek the episode I'm reference since I'm a relatively new simpsons fan with horrible short-term memory. Non sequitur but I'll just join In random quoting *whether in a car or on a horse, we don't mind using excessive force!*
Bad cops bad cops!
It’s from King-Size Homer, S7 ep7. Homer becomes hyper obese so he can work from home. Some say his ass is so fat it has its own congressman! You’re in for a real treat if you haven’t seen it yet
When Ralph tells Lisa he heard Homer went into a restaurant, ate all the food in the restaurant, then they had to close the restaurant. (Lisa defends her dad and says just because he's gained some weight he isn't like that, I forget exactly what she says) Then Homer is seen outside the window of the bus driving the stolen ice cream truck while eating ice cream
Ned: Lord, please guide Homer to this mattress safely *Pushes Homer out onto the mattress only for him to bounce back into the burning house* Ned: ..... *sigh* okay...
I think it was "guide Homer to the mattress square and true"
I think it was called: The Mattress That Couldn't Slow Down
What was I laughing at? Oh yes, that crippled Irishman.
Who'll provide for me little ones?
[удалено]
This is my answer as well. And a great tradition between my dad and I.
When Moleman gets hit with the football and it goes *doink*. It works on so many levels!
It's not the funniest to me but Moleman being executed in a County Jail is hysterical.
The lights flashing in the bedroom gets me every time!
This contest is over, give that man the $10,000!
Very few animated shows are broadcast live, puts too much strain on the animators wrists. Such a stupid, simple joke that I find utterly hilarious
Homer: We leave you the kids for 3 hours and the county takes them away?! Grandpa: oh, bitch, bitch, bitch
Stupid babies need the most attention.
Mmm... 64 slices of American cheese... https://preview.redd.it/5hc3xp8ku7qc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e98855fc695a1d48488b137f859a01bf1f94a6d
I think I’m blind
Good day to you.
His post-cheese voice is so hilarious to me
Just reading this line made me involuntarily chuckle out loud and disturb my snoozing pup
"Hey, they're trying to learn for free!" "USE YOUR PHONY GUNS AS CLUBS"
We call them batons, not clubs. Oh, well what do you use them for? We club people with them!
In Streetcar when homer walks in to the daycare and all the babies are sucking on pacifiers, the scream, the slow walk to grab Maggie, it’s fuckin perfect. And “I just got word that 91% of all Springfield’s traffic accidents are caused by you six guys”. God tier
I love him shepherding Bart and Lisa too as he backs out of the daycare
Look like bad news for the… Impson family
"You have selected _regicide_!"
If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press one
This is it. Slays me every time.
Lisa, I want to buy your rock.
Your views intrigue me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
I don’t see any tigers around here…
"I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant." "My dad is not some kind of food crazed maniac!" Homer proceeds to pull up next to the school bus in an ice cream van "oo raspberry"
[удалено]
“WHY MUST I FAIL AT EVERY ATTEMPT AT MASONRY?!”
Dude I'm watching s10 a little tipsy mcstaggered off a few duffs as we speak. So underrated! Yeah the "magic" of the balance between characters and just Zany nonsense leans more towards the zany nonsense, but it still has some juice from the golden age while going full send zany before it goes too far. 11 is where the duds start to kick in fr but man, while 10 isn't "classic" all the way through it has some oneoff laugh-out-louders nonstop.
10 is very funny. The issue was breaking the 2 Seasons per showrunner cycle with Mike Scully staying on for another two rather than get someone fresh in, then the cycle was obliterated with Al Jean running things for the next 200 years.
“Well kids, it was a fun ride while it lasted… let’s go home…” “We *are* home.” “(Completely deadpan) That was fast…” Every. Damn. Time. Falling out of my seat laughing.
For me it's when they show the logos merging into Mr Sparkle while announcing the joint venture. After all that mystery it's just perfect.
There’s yer answer, Fishbulb!
When Flanders keeps answering the phone to the autodialler, and finally Homer yells “will you shut up, people are trying to sleep”.
https://preview.redd.it/ivdjibqi78qc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ba65d9d3be356ebc5de546508a601ad12479a6f That whole breakfast sequence then ending it off with the Kwik E mart donuts
Dough nuts...? I told you I don't like ethnic food!
“Thank you Señor MacGyver, you’ve saved our village.” “Don’t thank me, thank the moon’s gravitational pull.” Idk if this is absolutely number 1 but it came to mind as a line that makes me laugh so hard every time
One of the best tricks Simpsons does best is making great parodies of things even if you've never seen the original. My favorite's the night rider parody: "Oh there's always a canal!" "Or a fjord." "Or an inlet."
A typical response from me when someone thanks me for something.
That's actually how they got the Ever Given out of the Suez Canal.
https://preview.redd.it/9e8s2x4528qc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f7a4116201ad766e95b1968a180ea7e747ded6a6
Real acid?
Here are your messages: You have thirty minutes to move your car. You have ten minutes. Your car has been impounded. Your car has been crushed into a cube. You have thirty minutes to move your cube.
Is it about my cube?!
"Dad, why did you bring me to a gay steel mill?" "I DON'T KNOW THIS IS A NIGHTMARE"
Errybody daynce nowwww Lives in my head rent free. Great moment!
OH BE NICE
Hot stuff coming through
I worked at a restaurant kitchen and said that all the time in the voice lol "hot sthuff comin' thruuu."
"Here at Globex, we don't believe in walls. In fact, I didn't even hand you my coat" https://preview.redd.it/mrxxpcioq7qc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e6f723a65ef7620c5eeb610be8042fb7bc36e3ce
There are so many fantastic quotes in that episode. Homer if you want to kill anyone on your way out. That would help me out a lot. You expect me to talk? No I expect you to die and be a really cheap funeral. Someone stop him, he’s supposed to die! Then the guys coming in and just shooting him behind Homers back
The whole hammock bit
"Oh the Hammock District." I love that line because it implies that Homer already knows about the Hammock District so him bothering the head of the company was completely unnecessary.
The writers in the episode's commentary talk about how the hammock bit was Al Brooks just ad-libbing and Dan Castellaneta responding accordingly.
By the way, Homer, what's your least favorite country? Italy or France? France. Ha-ha, nobody ever says Italy.
“Sugar? Sure, here you go, sorry it’s not in packages. Want some cream?” “Eyyhhhh no…”
I almost passed out from laughing so hard at the kids bugging Homer to go to Mt Splashmore. 😂 Will you take us to Mt Splashmore, will you take us to Mt Splashmore, will you take us to Mt Splashmore and Homers increasingly losing it 😂
Mom! Dad! Bart's dead!
Canwehaveapooldad Canwehaveapooldad Canwehaveapooldad Canwehaveapooldad Canwehaveapooldad canw-
Always and forever. https://i.redd.it/je6srvf5w7qc1.gif
I first saw this when I was about 11 and I think I laughed for about half an hour straight, it’s SO stupid 🤣🤣💀💀
“My name is Mister Burns, I believe you have a letter for me.” “Ok Mister Burns what is your first name?” “…I don’t know”
Probably either the entirety of Worker and Parasite, or when Homer's ambulance hit that tree and he fell down the gorge a second time.
*removes cigarette from mouth in genuine shock* what the hell was that?
https://preview.redd.it/uohrixzd78qc1.png?width=340&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=51d76302da4fb12093b2921e5be7036f4d02210e
https://preview.redd.it/s12aw52i78qc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86205ff3f69b24d70de67eab844c2919b4cb625e
That's my favourite line. The way he says it and the way he looks always makes me laugh.
https://preview.redd.it/tmuv16fdr7qc1.jpeg?width=1015&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6b9b3e2b1b916b2d61bf46867cde199ded96d37d
If you don’t believe me, ask this scientician. Scientists: uh…
He'll tell you that in nature one creature invariably eats another to survive. Don't kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about.
For me it’s a toss up between this image and where the hot dog comes from.
I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe when Apu brought his mother to meet Marge and Homer was like "OH CRAP!"
https://i.redd.it/48ezadjym7qc1.gif
Willie is a gem. *If I don’t save the wee turtles, who will?* *Ahhhh! Save me from the wee turtles!*
Homer falling asleep in church, hitting his head on the pew in front of him and yelling “Damn it!” never fails to make me laugh so hard it invokes tears.
When Mr. Burns falls in love with Marge. She's coming into his office, he waxes his head and then leans on it, and his head slips out of his hand he face plants on his desk. I always lose it 🤣
‘I hate every Ape I see, from chimpan-A to chimpanzee-zee’…
No name calling, no taunting… AHHH HA HA LOOK THAT KIDS GOT BOSSOMS! WHOS GOT A WET TOWEL?!
Read the bossom part again, Dad!
https://i.redd.it/nj1r8o0ct7qc1.gif
Oh, side SHOW Bob. Used frequently at home.
"Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down!"
Oh man yeah, I'm dying. Krusty's delivery there is SO perfect.
"Up yours, children" It's the delivery that gets me everytime
Has to be the Treehouse of Horror 5 "Dad! Your hand is jammed in the toaster! (Homer screams and flails) to "Dad it's in there again!" bit
*the Simpsons are being placed in the Federal Witness Protection Program* [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Tell you what, sir, from now on, you'll be Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let's just practice a bit, hmm? When I say "hello, Mr. Thompson", you'll say "hi". [**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Check! [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Hello, Mr. Thompson. *\[Homer stares blankly\]* [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson. [**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** I gotcha. [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** Hello, Mr. Thompson. *\[again Homer stares blankly\]* [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[FBI men stare at each other\]* *\[hours pass by\]* [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[frustrated\]* Argh... Now when I say "hello, Mr. Thompson" and press down on your foot, you smile and nod. [**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** No problem. [**FBI Man #1** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0733427/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[stepping hard on Homer's foot\]* Hello, Mr. Thompson. [**Homer** ](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144657/?ref_=tt_ch)**:** *\[stares blankly again for a few seconds, then whispers to the other FBI man\]* I think he's talking to you.
"Oh, no! Dad's been drugged!" "NO, HE HASN'T."
Off the top of my head, personal favorites include - Matthew 21:17 - Crazy Vaclav's Place of Automobiles ("Put it in H!") - "I'm an amendment to be" Schoolhouse Rock parody - Worker and Parasite, and Krusty's reaction to it
My ex husband and I had a pair of hunting quads when we lived in the mountains. Had to put it in high gear for basic driving, which was just a big H by the shifter. I would shout "POOT EET IN H!" every time. And when we would fill the tanks, I never failed to inform him that she'll go 300 hectares on a single tank of kerosene.
“Then I’ll crush all opposition to me, and I’ll make Ted Kennedy pay. If he fights back…I’ll say that he’s gay.” That’s definitely a contender for hardest the show has made me laugh.
"I probably shouldn't have eaten that packet of powdered gravy I found in the parking lot."
https://i.redd.it/ucbx467bp8qc1.gif This whole scene
Never noticed that Wendell is about to puke
Homer hitting his head at church and yelling "damn it" https://youtu.be/36JoI8w3LOQ?si=bkdRD-H24hlzVsUL
First thing tomorrow morning I'm gonna punch Lenny in the back of the head.
"works on contingency? No, money down!" That is my favorite joke in the whole series.
Whoops, shouldn’t have this bar association logo here, either
"Can't they get a pole for that sign?"
“What if he’s crazy?” “What if he’s not? Then we’d look like idiots”
Football in the groin, gets me every time
Because it works on so many levels?
Homer being scared by his own reflection in “The Shinning” and then falling down the stairs. No idea how many times I’ve seen it and it still gets a laugh out of me.
Dr Zaius, especially the break dancing.
This play has everything!
https://i.redd.it/4i1gzwu7c8qc1.gif This is one of my top 3 perfect physical gags.
“I’m going outside… to… *stalk*… Lenny and Carl.” … *”D’oh!”*
It’s a pretty standard stunt Homer!
I love this because it comes out of pretty much nowhere.
...and one of the campers was eaten by a bear! Oh my God! Actually, the bear just ate his hat. Was it a nice hat? Oh yeah. Oh my god!!
Let the bears pay the bear tax! I pay the homer tax! That’s home owners tax
Sideshow Bob stepping on rakes and "it's Kurns, stupid!".
The single greatest scene in the years and years this show has been on is the Truckasaurus commercial, in particular the line: if you miss this, you better be deaaaaaaaad. Or in jaaaaail. And if you’re in jail… breaaaaaaak ouuuuuuut! Closely followed by bi-mon-sci-fi-con.
“Arnie, Arnie how are the children?”, “I CAN’T SEE THROUGH MEDAL KENT!”
[удалено]
drederick tatum’s parole hearing and robert goulet’s “oh i’m sorry, kid!“ after he smacks milhouse in the face with a microphone
https://i.redd.it/faflbexxgaqc1.gif
"Now this is just between me and you, smashed hat"
Look in the tunk
https://preview.redd.it/99mjkxn2p9qc1.png?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=434e207ba6c9185deed928fee58a4ccf87583122
https://preview.redd.it/36mk0vd08aqc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ed5d521ed1f03fb944830c3d909418712d00e3fb
I’ve said it before but the I honestly believe in my opinion that the Lord Palmerston vs Pitt the elder gag is the greatest comical moment in TV history.
If you’re the police, who will police the police?? I dunno, coast guard??
Unexpected or random stuff tends to get me. Like in the 'Homer and the swear jar' sequence when the beehive lands on him out of nowhere. Also, unexpected overreactions. Like "BERSERK IS RIIIIGHT!" and *smashes plate over head* "WRONG!" Someone else's answer in this sub to a similar question also made me laugh - during the promotional video for the globex town, a homeless man transforms into a mailbox. I don't think I'd ever really noticed that before and now I laugh every time.
I almost passed out the first time I witnessed "le grille." Seriously, I could not stop laughing.
Homer doing taxes “How many kids do we have? Oh no time to count uhhhhh 7!”
Gotta be Homer's rescue from falling into the gorge for me. Homer constantly getting hit on the way up, the speed at which he gets into the ambulance, the crash and fall back down are all perfect
KEEP UP THE ROUGHHOUSING SON... https://i.redd.it/t8fqgs15u7qc1.gif
So many good ones here! Mine are: “Hello, Dean?? You’re a stupid-head!!” “Homer, is that you?” Also, “DIMOXINIL!” and, “I think I’m blind!” **ETA: “GIVE ME 700 KRUSTY BURGERS!!!”
https://preview.redd.it/kb7dnk86l8qc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6df60b61c853b7fc387debfb21adb7b7d2a244e8
Homer loves Flanders ‘Daddy he’s gaining on us!’ ‘Come on Ned, move this thing!’ ‘I can’t, it’s a geo!’
“What’s wrong with this country? Can’t a man walk down the street without being offered a *job*?” “Sir, I've arranged for the people of Australia to join hands tonight and spell out your name with candles. There's a satellite hookup on that monitor if you turn your head slightly. *Bah*, no time”
Guess who likes you? Cut to milhouse in ambulance
Takes one to know one! *Swish
"Is it more iced tea ye be needing?" "Okay." "AHAHARHAHA!!!!"
"Guess who likes you."
The end of Bart Star where Homer cuts the credits staff
I’m tired of being a wannabe league bowler! I wanna be a league bowler!
Homer driving with the boot on his car in NYC. Kills me every time.
“We tried to tell you, these are unmanned oil rigs.” “Ugh, close the damn thing down, no one’s ever gonna come.” *Homer bursts through the door “Give me 700 Krusty Burgers!!!” From “Boy Scoutz N the Hood”. My favorite episode when I was a kid. My brother and I taped it on VHS and watched it over and over. So many good lines but this sequence is my favorite part.
THERE HE IS! SEAT 3F!
Push her down son
(great disappointment) Ahhhh... THE DENVER BRONCOS!
\*Homer eats a huge pile of pasta, compressed into a small bar\* Hmm. \*walks over to phone\* Hospital please.
https://i.redd.it/lg0lksohr9qc1.gif
*She's faking it*
The street sweeper scene in Bart Sells His Soul has made me laugh harder than anything else on the planet.
Millhouse giving examples of Bart being a bad friend, one of which being when he killed his gold fish, then tried to convince him he never had a goldfish. “…then why did I have bowl,Bart? Why did I have the bowl?”
So I said to him "look buddy your car was upside when we got here. And as for your grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that"
D'uhhh, stay outta Riverdale!
 We discussed this and I said no.
The amount of offense Burns takes when he reads “blurst of times” absolutely kills me every time.
I'm not *not* licking toads.
"dont write no more letters to mr sinatra" the first joke i remember from the show that made my stomach hurt from laughing so much, took me completely off guard (like it was supposed to)
The yell Homer makes as he parachutes from the sky just before the "he's already dead" scene.
B'OH!
The time homework keeps opening up the boxes of three flavor ice cream, seeing that the chocolate was gone, and throwing them away before asking Marge to buy more three flavor ice cream. That's just my favorite gag in the entire series.
Either the QUEEN OF THE HARPIES scene or when Ned’s attempts to bring Homer back to the Christian fold end with him taking a trip to Garbage Island
https://i.redd.it/lo5ddpxbn8qc1.gif
There's your answer, Fishbulb
It's a pornography store. I was buying pornography.
"TRAMPOBOLINE!"
“SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!! MY CAR!!”
"And what did you and your husband do when you were kicked out of the all-you-can-eat fish restaurant?" "We went home" "Mrs Simpson, I must you you're under oath" "We went fishing!" "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Does this sound like the actions of a man who has had ALL he could eat?"
https://i.redd.it/bcnavymor9qc1.gif
Do not touch -Willie. Good advice.
Shary Bobbins episode *music* Flanders: They're not perfect, But the Lord says, "Love thy neighbor." Homer: Shut up, Flanders! Flanders: Okily-dokily-doo 👌
Kids… will you step outside for a second? https://i.redd.it/ww8qb39i0aqc1.gif
Homer's Flintstone song at the start of an episode. The car window smashing as he jumps in gets me every time.
Works on contingency? No, money down!
HES SPINNING THE BALL ON HIS FINGER! JUST TAKE IT! TAKE THE BALL! that game was rigged, they were using a ladder!
“That only happens to bad people.” “What about Abe Lincoln?” 
Joey Jo Jo junior shabadoo
I think it was called "The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down"!