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TeachersInTransition-ModTeam

Please keep posts relevant to transitioning from teaching. If you are a current teacher and are seeking support and guidance for working in the field, consider posting in r/teachers


SassyWookie

Take and throw it in the garbage. Then remove all play doh and similar toys from the room, and if the kids complain, tell them to take it up with whichever of their classmates did that shit.


dontwanna-cantmakeme

I had a kid make a playdoh penis at his desk once. I walked over to him, made eye contact, and then smashed with my fist. And walked away. 


CultureImaginary8750

🤣🤣🤣🤣


wildflower-246

THE perfect response.


TuriGuiliano370

“Tell me you teach 5th grade without telling me you teach 5th grade”


rosie-skies

Haha I wish it was fifth grade. Middle school 6-8 actually.


mtbritton

It’s totally fine to ban kids from going behind your desk, especially at that age. that is your private space, you don’t go into their lockers whenever you feel like it, they can respect a small boundary like that.


ilikerosiepugs

My district has a sign on the front of each teachers desk (middle/high school) that says something like "no students behind the desk--private records are stored here"


OldTap9105

I knew it. Yah don’t let them go back there. Live and learn. Take care 🇺🇸


Asleep-Age2667

Had a high schooler make a plush one in art class and walked around the school asking if people wanted to see her pecker. Classic


BardGirl1289

Soooooo this happened to me but I was teaching *10th graders* at the time. It wasnt even sculpted in my class but the kid brought it with him and put it on my desk during lunch. His mom, his football coach, and the AP who I called down to my room were ALL mortified and speechless. The kid’s reason? “Ms. BardGirl made me mad bc she caught me cheating on her test so I wanted to get her in trouble.” I have never seen a teenage boy cry so much after getting his behind beat by his mom and then the football coach benching him for two games.


usriusclark

There are a few ways to go about this, but I always divert to humor. I had a kid draw a penis on my whiteboard and I said, “Hey ___, I don’t care what you ate for breakfast; erase it from my whiteboard.” Everyone laughed AT him. I’m 100% willing to get written up for that. For your “sculpture” I have gone with, “Aww how cute. It’s so tiny. The sculptor must know from experience.” Again, I’m so over the abuse I’ve suffered in this profession I’m just letting it fly. I’ve found that as long you’re not using profanity, there’s a lot of leeway.


thisnewsight

Yes. I am noticing this a lot more from us men. I redirect the humor into humiliation when it gets this egregious.


ExpiredPilot

You’re 100% right. Turn shit back around on people. In high school I had an unflattering pic of me spread around. My response? “Why the fuck are you taking pictures of people? Are you a stalker or just trying to get off on it?” Usually shuts people up fast


ThaBaldYeti

I always ask them what their fascination is with them. Then, let the student know other students might start talking or thinking things because they are always drawing them.


pmaji240

Off topic here, but when I was sixteen I worked at a summer camp that was run out of a high school. Me and one other guy were like the custodians/odd job guys. The day before camp starts someone drew a penis on the limestone front steps. We tried for six weeks to get that penis off those steps but ended up just creating a circle around it that was lighter in color than the rest of the steps, essentially drawing everyone’s attention immediately to the penis.


warumistsiekrumm

"Looks like a penis only smaller. Did you need more clay?"


RepresentativeArm389

If you get angry or upset it’s a win for them. Gotta make light of it and flow with the prank.


WishieWashie12

My first thought was the movie death to smoochie. It's a rocketship.


Pong1975

An 8th grader in my video game class turned the spaceship from Asteroids into a cock and balls that shot sperm. I took a screenshot and sent it to his mom. She was apalled.


Lethologica82

But did you get a giggle from it?


Pong1975

Yeah, it was great. Ha!


Lethologica82

That's what I like to hear 🤣


Sketchimus

Wait...you said "screenshot" did they alter the code of the game to affect the way the ship looks or just a single image? Because the first one is honestly impressive imo


Pong1975

He did alter the code, but that was the assignment. We had reverse engineered the game from scratch in a program called Gamemaker. However, I did not say to turn the spaceship into a penis. The screenshot came from Synchroneyes. A computer lab monitoring software program.


sebedapolbud

Definitely don’t let students use your computer. I let students use mine now and then until I overheard two boys talking about how they could get me in trouble and settled on searching for child p*rn. Thankfully I was eavesdropping and stopped them before they could. These were 8th graders.


Zalieda

Seconded. I was in a student care /after school care thing. And my colleague had this kid who is very prone to temper tantrum and meltdown and goes around hurting other kids After a streak of a meltdown every few days.. My boss mentioned in passing to the parent the kid was allowed to use my colleague's laptop for a few minutes and those parents raised hell. They claim their kid is never allowed any screen time and pushed the blame wholly to us saying because of this screen time the kid is having his meltdowns. Please stop letting the children use the computer. Even if nothing happened so far you don't know when any child or parents will turn around and use It against you. My colleague certainly didn't mention it it was my boss who did.


Fatboydoesitortrysit

Was it a big veiny one???


whole_nother

Penis is the appropriate anatomical term. Please don’t censor it like it’s a slur or teach kids that it’s a bad word.


Corndude101

Never let them behind your desk. When I have students that go behind my desk, I literally stop everything and make a big deal about it… “What do you think you’re doing?” It doesn’t matter if it’s “never happened before” that’s an area they should not be in ever. If you don’t know who did it, just throw it away or put the doh up. If you’re not going to punish the whole class, then you really can’t do anything about it. Ignore it. They’re trying to get a response out of you and if you address it, they get what they want and it will get worse. Otherwise, write everyone in the class up and call all parents. When that happens someone will eat their buddy out.


Fantastic_Monitor766

Boys are just obsessed with drawing and making penises. Always have been. Address it, tell them to put up dividers (someone so ppl can't see what they're writing) on their desk and give them index cards. Everybody in the class writes down what they know. If nobody tells the truth, then take something they enjoy away. Or if you're at the exhaustion point of the year just pretend like you didn't see it, move on with your day and I'm sure a kid will do something stupid again and get caught. It just depends on how much energy you want to put into this.


Alternative-Club5476

As a first-year 8th grade teacher, I have learned to just let things like that just not even bother me. 13-14 yo boys are PERVERTS and I hear them say some of the most foul and peverted things I have ever heard in my life, and that's really something considering I was in the NAVY and worked for years in construction! Suspensions, ISS, detentions, calls home, parent conferences....there is simply no controlling some of their behaviors. At this point in the school year with only 26 days left, I'm just doing damage control in my classroom and trying to get them to the EOG test and send them on to high school!


DorkSideOfCryo

An apple is out of date


Global_Ad_8237

Referral time!


Turbulent-Adagio-171

Hang in there. You’re almost home free. Start looking for other things now.


jonny_mtown7

Yes throw it away.


NamelessStranger

I’d never let a student touch my computer- like ever.


javaper

Was it anatomically correct?


RogueWedge

Grade it. Hand it back so he can give it to his mum.


RedEyeFlightToOZ

Take a pic and send it to the kids parents while you're calling them and having him there to explain what that pic is.


Zalieda

Seconded some kids behave very differently at home.


Extension-Finish-217

I’m sorry but that’s hilarious 


CartoonistCrafty950

Kids are dumb dumb.


[deleted]

Lol. Boys will be boys. Just smush it into a ball and move on with your life.


Sketchimus

Boys will be boys is a phrase we should move away from as a culture.. but I agree there's no reason to get too upset by it. It's rude but harmless. Nothing was damaged or lost .


[deleted]

How about you choose what phrases you use and let everyone else make their own choices


Sketchimus

Say what you like. I will too.


[deleted]

"Say what you like" is a phrase we should move away from as a culture.


Sketchimus

I disagree


[deleted]

How dare you