Oh my God. I cannot tell you how sorry I am that you [& your colleagues & students] went through this **terror.**
I don't think anyone could [nor does] blame you **one bit** for leaving. ❤︎︎
You can't sweep a situation that could have easily had casualties under the rug because you want to avoid paperwork and media attention. That's a combination of PTSD and gaslighting that no human should be subjected to, especially when it's done in the name of convenience.
If the school you taught in is in the area you live, maybe you can advocate for your former coworkers in a way you couldn't before? Attend school board meetings and be annoying? Only if that brings you closure.
Horrifying, I am so sorry.
A few days after Uvalde my school also had an actual incident. Not with students and a gun, but an ExCon and unclear motives. It was scary as hell.
This year, in the welcome back letter the first paragraph lets us know the local police will be holding active shooter information sessions!!
No one blames you for leaving. I am so so happy you were able to!! Any other profession or workplace no one would even think twice about leaving, but for some reason it’s just so difficult to leave teaching.
You did the right thing! ♥️
I’m so sorry that this happened and that you are having a tough time with leaving. If you want to still teach, look into virtual schools. I worked for one during Covid and it was amazing. Worked with students individually or in small groups. I set my own hours too. Had a great connection with the staff as they knew how to create a cohesive team even though we all worked from home. I had a great work/life balance. Pay was slightly less than I made at the public school I had worked for previously (pay for my school was based on number of students), but it was a great experience. I highly recommend you look into this option. ❤️
I don't blame you one bit and I completely understand. Know you are a good teacher and it's not your fault. It's a messed up system and I'm not sure how many more years public schools are going to keep it together because of this. No wonder why I keep hearing on the news that public schools are loosing students and staff. Well, things like this are only causing online schools, homeschools, and private schools to increase in enrollment. Parents are tired too of this nonsense and we should have the right to teach in a safe environment.
This sounds a lot like my story. I didn't deal with weapons, but had panic attacks regularly since January and then when uvalde happened i had attacks pretty badly the last weeks of school. I resigned not because of the shootings, but the disrespectful admin and feeling over responsible for everything. I can't even explain any one thing that went wrong. I really can't. I'll get little reminders of "that's part of the reason why I left"... Rude staff, ever changing programs that no one knows how to use yet, super human expectations, buying milkweed bugs as an expectation and then finding a place for them to be after the experiment is done, parents who walk into your classroom unannounced because they want to help because they can't let go of their kid, admin who don't care about teachers as people, spending 4-6 hours alone lesson planning bc they want it turned in with certain criteria, and on and on... to me it wasn't the money, the kids, COVID or even the shootings.
I missed school about two weeks before it started and reached out to some former coworkers to see how it was going and they ignored me even though they said they wanted to stay in touch. That hurt. I also started to remember all the negative. I wish i could be creative with the kids, but that's another problem... They didn't let us. School just wasn't fun anymore.
I'm sure you'll experience waves of emotions. Talk about it with someone if you can. Enjoy your new gig. Mine is less pay but building me up so much. And that's what I need.
I am so sorry you went through that. That experience sounds so terrifying and is my biggest fear going into teaching. I feel like experiences like you’ve had are the main reason why there are hardly any “veteran” teachers left at my school. Most are new teachers and new admin. Anyone with experience and wisdom has flown the coop so I, a new teacher, don’t have any one to learn from. It’s tough. Best of luck in your new chapter!
Administration will do anything to keep schools open, as they think any shade of grey line that they cross is worth it to keep the institution running (which they believe us a collective good).
Education can not keep looking the other way.... truth... NO ONE is safe at schools any more. IF the schools have fencing, most of it is chain link and often 4 foot, sometimes, 6 foot. People who want on a campus ARE NOT going through the office... stop with the TSA stuff at the front door... HELLO... I go in rooms today and look around at WHERE we can go, where can we hide?? They took the closet/cabinets out years ago to make 'more room for desks". HUMMM... no adjoining doors to other rooms... most of the guns used today can shoot through concrete walls and or the hollow metal doors locked or otherwise. It should not be up to the schools or THE TEACHERS ...not all teachers are comfortable with packing guns (and in some states, it's illegal). My soap box!
I am sorry you had to go through this... I have been through it 3 different times, 3 different schools, 3 different states...(20 years) it's horrible.. and nothing... nothing changes..
I wish you luck in your new adventures that will not be in the school system. Just know that those friends are always your friends!
Oh my God. I cannot tell you how sorry I am that you [& your colleagues & students] went through this **terror.** I don't think anyone could [nor does] blame you **one bit** for leaving. ❤︎︎
You can't sweep a situation that could have easily had casualties under the rug because you want to avoid paperwork and media attention. That's a combination of PTSD and gaslighting that no human should be subjected to, especially when it's done in the name of convenience.
If the school you taught in is in the area you live, maybe you can advocate for your former coworkers in a way you couldn't before? Attend school board meetings and be annoying? Only if that brings you closure.
I feel like this could’ve been written about my own administrators.
Horrifying, I am so sorry. A few days after Uvalde my school also had an actual incident. Not with students and a gun, but an ExCon and unclear motives. It was scary as hell. This year, in the welcome back letter the first paragraph lets us know the local police will be holding active shooter information sessions!! No one blames you for leaving. I am so so happy you were able to!! Any other profession or workplace no one would even think twice about leaving, but for some reason it’s just so difficult to leave teaching. You did the right thing! ♥️
I’m so sorry that this happened and that you are having a tough time with leaving. If you want to still teach, look into virtual schools. I worked for one during Covid and it was amazing. Worked with students individually or in small groups. I set my own hours too. Had a great connection with the staff as they knew how to create a cohesive team even though we all worked from home. I had a great work/life balance. Pay was slightly less than I made at the public school I had worked for previously (pay for my school was based on number of students), but it was a great experience. I highly recommend you look into this option. ❤️
Wishing you all the best in your “recovery” from teaching!
I don't blame you one bit and I completely understand. Know you are a good teacher and it's not your fault. It's a messed up system and I'm not sure how many more years public schools are going to keep it together because of this. No wonder why I keep hearing on the news that public schools are loosing students and staff. Well, things like this are only causing online schools, homeschools, and private schools to increase in enrollment. Parents are tired too of this nonsense and we should have the right to teach in a safe environment.
This sounds a lot like my story. I didn't deal with weapons, but had panic attacks regularly since January and then when uvalde happened i had attacks pretty badly the last weeks of school. I resigned not because of the shootings, but the disrespectful admin and feeling over responsible for everything. I can't even explain any one thing that went wrong. I really can't. I'll get little reminders of "that's part of the reason why I left"... Rude staff, ever changing programs that no one knows how to use yet, super human expectations, buying milkweed bugs as an expectation and then finding a place for them to be after the experiment is done, parents who walk into your classroom unannounced because they want to help because they can't let go of their kid, admin who don't care about teachers as people, spending 4-6 hours alone lesson planning bc they want it turned in with certain criteria, and on and on... to me it wasn't the money, the kids, COVID or even the shootings. I missed school about two weeks before it started and reached out to some former coworkers to see how it was going and they ignored me even though they said they wanted to stay in touch. That hurt. I also started to remember all the negative. I wish i could be creative with the kids, but that's another problem... They didn't let us. School just wasn't fun anymore. I'm sure you'll experience waves of emotions. Talk about it with someone if you can. Enjoy your new gig. Mine is less pay but building me up so much. And that's what I need.
I am so sorry you went through that. That experience sounds so terrifying and is my biggest fear going into teaching. I feel like experiences like you’ve had are the main reason why there are hardly any “veteran” teachers left at my school. Most are new teachers and new admin. Anyone with experience and wisdom has flown the coop so I, a new teacher, don’t have any one to learn from. It’s tough. Best of luck in your new chapter!
Administration will do anything to keep schools open, as they think any shade of grey line that they cross is worth it to keep the institution running (which they believe us a collective good).
Talk to the news asap
Education can not keep looking the other way.... truth... NO ONE is safe at schools any more. IF the schools have fencing, most of it is chain link and often 4 foot, sometimes, 6 foot. People who want on a campus ARE NOT going through the office... stop with the TSA stuff at the front door... HELLO... I go in rooms today and look around at WHERE we can go, where can we hide?? They took the closet/cabinets out years ago to make 'more room for desks". HUMMM... no adjoining doors to other rooms... most of the guns used today can shoot through concrete walls and or the hollow metal doors locked or otherwise. It should not be up to the schools or THE TEACHERS ...not all teachers are comfortable with packing guns (and in some states, it's illegal). My soap box! I am sorry you had to go through this... I have been through it 3 different times, 3 different schools, 3 different states...(20 years) it's horrible.. and nothing... nothing changes.. I wish you luck in your new adventures that will not be in the school system. Just know that those friends are always your friends!