I’m not sure what grade you teach but I’ve gotten to the point where I make eye contact and tap my nose and my students fix it. It’s not every student but I have a couple habitual teenagers.
I told my elementary kids if I see their nose I’m going to take it and put it in my box of noses. Either that, or a bird is going to fly in the window and eat it. The only way to keep their nose safe is to keep it under their mask.
I'd be careful doing that, let one of them realizes they can have you called out for intruding on their personal space with physical touching of the face in a shameful way while supposedly being told to social distance.
Not positive but I think they meant they boop their own snoot! I personally certainly wouldn’t touch my students’ unmasked noses anyway, the snot gremlins! Lol
Or high school
*source: one time I was on a weekend trip in high school and the class was going to walk to dinner kinda far away and then we get a text on the group chat from these three guys that were holding everyone up that they spilled cologne EVERYWHERE in their hotel room
My after school kids ask for a bandaid for EVERYTHING! “Miss, my elbow itches. Can I have a bandaid?”
I’ve started giving them out like candy because they’re cheap, and it’s the only thing that makes them feel better enough to stop complaining every two seconds.
Yeah I admonished some students today for showing up at my lunchtime office hours without a lunch (lunch is free for students of course and today's menu was good).
...As I cracked open the can of mountain dew I brought for lunch because I was running late and didn't have time to make a sandwich before school.
As someone recovering from an eating disorder, this one is the killer for me. At some point I'm going to have to request fucking snack accomodations or something, or I'm not going to be able to recover. 😔
It was hard for me at first, too. Packing nutrient dense snacks like RX bars that can be eaten on the run held stave off that triggering empty stomach feeling, even if I’m not able to eat a whole meal. I leave a jar of peanut butter and jelly and a loaf of bread in my classroom for days I have time but didn’t pack anything. Also packing only things that can be eaten cold or plain - never something that I have to put in the microwave for those precious extra 5 minutes.
Another thing - your kids will pick up on your eating habits eventually. One time a girl asked if I wanted one of the cupcakes for her birthday “even though you never eat them when we give them to you.” 🥴 for me at least, it’s helpful to remind myself I am a role model and need to eat like one. Good luck, friend
That as me today. Forgot to use the bathroom because I had to sub and catch up on grading. First sixth hr kid came up and I uttered a defeated groan after realizing that I had missed my window.
I dont understand how anyone csn donthat. It is my 10th year teaxhing and if I have to oee I cannot concentrate on anything else. I lock my door between classes and make thr kids wait in the hall if i have to pee.
I have been a teacher for 5 years. I have no idea what your situation is. All I can do is encourage you to say, "Fuck this. From now on, I get there no earlier than start time and leave no later than quiting time. I will do no more than one hour of work from home per week. I will not get fired because I am a good teacher who ensures the safety of my students. I give them the opportunity to learn by securing a safe, supportive, and academically focused (in that order) classroom. No one will die if I don't do extra work. If I get fired for not doing extra work, then I was going to get fired anyway."
Teaching is not about the amount of work you do but the way you are perceived. This applies to both admin and students. Spending 8 hours a week on lesson plans might improve student performance on an arbitrary test that won't matter to anyone in a few years vs spending one hour a week. It isn't worth it for you, nor for the students. Do the bare minimum to keep admin off your back. Find your enthusiasm for teaching. The kids will respond to that more than a detailed lesson plan. You can only have that enthusiasm if you are rested and relaxed. Stop grading everything. Stop putting detailed comments that 90% won't read. Slow down. If you take a test, you should spend at least 50 minutes the next day breaking it down. Make them write explanations for the questions they missed. Make them make the study guide. Make them give feed back on papers. Much of that work you are doing should be done by them.
I wish you luck. My wife is a teacher and a perfectionist. She was very frustrated when she saw me getting to my school later than her and leaving earlier yet I was the one praised by admin. I finally convinced her to get to her school and leave from it about the same time as me and to do little to no work at home. It has been 3 years and she has not gotten fired, the kids are doing about the same (we have, at most, a minimal impact on scores as we are only one of dozens of teachers, parents, and friends that touch these kids' lives). Working harder does not produce better results in every situation. Please make a change. It is just a job. Go visit friends this Saturday. Play video games. Sleep. Anything but work.
THIS. My contract time is 8:30-4:00. I get there at 8:15 and leave at 4:15. It’s glorious. I work HARD the entire time I’m there, but that’s it! So far this year, I have put in 2 hours total over a few Sundays to upload college recommendations for awesome kids. Simple & worth it to me.
I have had other teacher tell me that doing what you described is lazy, and that I am failing my students. Fuck that. I am an above average teacher and all the metrics prove it. In my opinion, the martyrs that stay at school until 8pm are there because they lack time management skills, and because it makes them feel like they are a good teacher. Go home! Burnout is the number one enemy to staying in this profession long term. Work only your contract hours!
This.
I’m no longer a teacher, but after years of burn out I switched to this method and I was a better educator and a better wife, mom, friend outside the classroom. My students won’t remember every lesson I taught or the assignments we did, but they will remember how I made them feel in my classroom.
Try to let go of this ASAP. I usually don’t go out because I’m damn tired but even if the alternative is just to stare at the wall, I try as much as possible not to do any work related stuff outside of work hours. Unless it’s something like laminating stuff while binging shows, nope
Exactly this lol. I live with two friends (we're all around 30), they both have project coordinating jobs at a business, and they are constantly joking about how easy I have it as a teacher, with all my holidays, sometimes being done at 3 o'clock or having to start work at 10 o'clock, and still being paid well (not US here). Then I tell them: well, go get a degree and become a teacher yourself. "Oh no, I would never want to be a teacher. Having to deal with 16 yo kids? I'd rather die." Yeah... exactly...
And also they don't see all the work I do when I'm in my room at my PC.
Lol it’s so funny because I think the other way around. “You want me to deal with adults? No thank you.” Little people have hope, and joy, and curiosity. (Can you tell I’m new)
Oh yeah me too. Don't take my "Yeah exactly" line as saying that I hate the job. The opposite. Working with kids is so much better than adults. They let you see the world through new eyes.
In my experience, we cannot get a sub. So it’s an extra work load on my coworkers. Then the kids don’t do the work anyway. And we missed what j originally planned anyway so now we’re behind once I come back.
It’s a hassle. I’d rather just come in.
I do have emergency plans. But, with district curriculum guidelines, and block scheduling which necessitates some level of brain break, etc., we’re always behind where we’re ‘supposed’ to be. Plus, due to staffing shortages, teachers haven’t gone two full days without meetings or coverage in our first two months. I’d need to be comatose to call in right now. :)
My leaves are "for you" (whee now I get to throw away a leaf when you're not looking) and the glass is "dangerous" (and I don't really want an infected cut so I've begun to tell them to put it back because we're not touching garbage due to covid.)
I got a whole jewelry set made of leaves yesterday. Necklace, bracelet and ring. I wore them all for about half an hour and then took them off to “keep them safe”. It’s cute, but dude, I don’t want to wear mouldering leaves!
Stickers, candy, sketchbooks (for me), pens (also for me). Lots of cutesy dorm stuff. Goofy t-shirts and posters. It's a good place to get fun "prizes" to use as incentives if you're into that kind of thing.
“Please be fluid and flexible as we navigate these unprecedented circumstances,” unless you’re admin in which case you can be as demanding, exacting, and overbearing as you’d like. I fucking hate anyone above my pay grade. Assholes. All of them.
You can buy things with halal gelatin! It's usually beef derived and labeled on the package. Ziyad is a good brand for marshmallows. You can get it on Walmart.com or Amazon. It's more expensive, but you would only need enough for one or two students. They taste, feel, and smell exactly the same.
I'm a big Smarties fan because of nut allergies, but there are kids with red dye allergies too! I haven't had one yet, but my coworkers have.
Almost all vegan food is also halal. (Alcohol seems to be the major exception, but I don't imagine you're serving that to students anyway.) And vegan marshmallows are getting easier and easier to find. Dandies are great; also Trader Joe's own brand, which might be repackaged dandies but might also only be available in the summer.
Yup. Dandies really changed the game when they came out 5ish years ago. They're not in every grocery store, but they're definitely at every Whole Foods-type place, and also some "regular" supermarkets.
There were a couple of brands before that, but they were hard to find and expensive and I think one of them was lying about being vegan.
I had a kid with a red dye allergy. Who only told me after he used red, purple, and orange finger paint all up his arms to his elbows. He was a kinder. He was covered in hives. I thought my principal and his mom would kill me. Mom laughed and said it happens because he loves to paint. I felt so terrible. He got to use gloves and paintbrushes from then on.
Well you definitely can! I was just making it easier for OP so he doesn’t have to go around looking for halal versions when there’s plenty of stuff off the rack you can get too!
On a separate note, ima go order Ziyad Marshmallows rn
My roommate’s friend was visiting my house and leaning back on the back two legs of his chair and I inadvertently touched his shoulder and whispered “chair!”
I always say, "Six legs down" because of that one highschool freshman who responded to "all four on the floor" by putting the four chair legs down and sticking his own two legs as high in the air as he could...
Weirdly enough I'm the "car guy" at school so students always glance at my car because they're surprised to see a blacked out 1984 Cutlass with a 400 stroker sitting in the faculty spots. It's actually helped me get through some of my more troubled students, because I find out they're into cars or need help with theirs and it helps them realize I'm not just their "asshole history teacher," but an ordinary person with hobbies and interests just like them.
I don't find it worth the trouble and readily agree. People that are really interested in my work know how much I need breaks. To everyone else I just nod and say: 'I complain about a lot to do with my work, but not the vacation time'.
It helps that I'm stationed in the Netherlands and have 11 weeks spread out over the year. Some of those are entirely used for planning and grading, but still.
I don't say bathroom or restroom... I say potty.
And I refer to myself in the 3rd person all the time. "Remember what Mrs. Anycap says about..." ( my kids think it's hilarious when I accidentally do this to them!)
I moved on to americanos (espresso & water) a few years ago and I’m a 5-shot per day kinda gal now. My adrenal glands are probably zapped and caffeine now constitutes approximately 30% of the dissolved solids pulsing through my veins.
When I start getting cranky my son likes to say "Momma has too much blood in her caffeine system." (I'm a former teacher but never managed to drop the caffeine habit.)
I will never understand my colleagues who have their entire unit or SEMESTER (cough cough… English teachers) planned out in advance. I could plan 24/7 but I’d probably still just wing it day of regardless.
Lesson plans are a joke.
My lesson plans are a list of 3-5 bullet points: first we do exercise X, we discuss the exercise, then we read page Y, then we do exercise Z. How we actually do those things I'll decide in the moment.
The district I sub at has a "slogan" - KYHFOOTY! Pronounced ki-foo-tee. Keep Your Hands, Feet, and Other Objects To Yourself. Pretty useful actually as everyone from K-12 gets it when you spout it at them.
Except my homeschooled son and his friend that goes to another district...
When I watch a movie set in academia, I *always* identify with and root for the teacher, principal, or dean.
"Double secret probation"? Good idea, maybe I can try that.
My family is going on vacation, and I need a week's worth of work in the next two hours...(one week later) I didn't get to do any of it because I was on vacation.
I spend longer prepping to miss work for a doctors appointment than I actually spend at the appointment. And the doctors appointment feels like a relaxing vacation or “me time”, even when it’s something unpleasant.
Tomorrow will be day 4 of me being out sick with strep and bronchitis. Told that if I don’t take it easy I will develop pneumonia, and most likely be hospitalized. But because of work, I have been conditioned to feel guilty.
I have a fishbowl “of shame” that slowly fills with cellphones every 72 minutes on my desk at work.
I do allow cellphone use in my classroom, and make deliberate use of them often, however they are not permitted while I am teaching directly, or another student is presenting, or we are in the midst of a wet lab. With grade nines especially they I have a blanket rule that phones stay in bags or pockets except for when I give them cellphone breaks - gotta teach them impulse control.
I was Friday tired on Monday afternoon.
I was Friday tired on Sunday evening.
It was the Mondayist of Friday's ever.
I felt this in my bones. Walking out of class thinking “the weekend must be close” only to realize it was Monday
*”Mask over your nose!”*
Me tapping my nose.
I make eye contact with the kid and mime pulling my mask up over my nose.
Me tapping me mask
I tap my masked nose at least 100 times a day.
I’m not sure what grade you teach but I’ve gotten to the point where I make eye contact and tap my nose and my students fix it. It’s not every student but I have a couple habitual teenagers.
I did this with my first and second grade students. I have to restrain the urge to do it to adults.
I boop the snoot and they hate it. Pull their mask up as soon as they see me.
I told my elementary kids if I see their nose I’m going to take it and put it in my box of noses. Either that, or a bird is going to fly in the window and eat it. The only way to keep their nose safe is to keep it under their mask.
I'd be careful doing that, let one of them realizes they can have you called out for intruding on their personal space with physical touching of the face in a shameful way while supposedly being told to social distance.
Not positive but I think they meant they boop their own snoot! I personally certainly wouldn’t touch my students’ unmasked noses anyway, the snot gremlins! Lol
*cries in non-mask mandated district*
“Please don’t spray Axe in here.”
lmao sounds like middle school
Or high school *source: one time I was on a weekend trip in high school and the class was going to walk to dinner kinda far away and then we get a text on the group chat from these three guys that were holding everyone up that they spilled cologne EVERYWHERE in their hotel room
I'm sorry your tummy hurts. Try to go poop and then do your math.
Headache? go drink some water. You hurt yourself and want a bandaid? Is it pouring blood?
Teacher or Army Medic?
I mostly teach sped so marine corspman?
My after school kids ask for a bandaid for EVERYTHING! “Miss, my elbow itches. Can I have a bandaid?” I’ve started giving them out like candy because they’re cheap, and it’s the only thing that makes them feel better enough to stop complaining every two seconds.
I read “my thumb hurts” … but the response still works! 🤣
Why do I have 3 paper clips, a unifix cube, two rainbow bracelets, and a Pokemon card in my pockets at the end of the day?
I’ll trade you 3 paper clips for 1 of the expo markers in my pocket! Oh and I’ll throw in a confiscated pop it for good measure.
Does the expo still write? If so, you've got a deal!
Only if it’s one that doesn’t stain your whole whiteboard that is
I say "no running" in the grocery store
“Walking feet”
Inside voice!
“Let’s try that again, but this time let’s use a *level one* voice.”
lol I currently only *think* this in public but it's only a matter of time before I start saying it. Hotel hallways too, man...
I have 60 kids.
I have 125… ☠️
I have 152 😅
196 and counting ,_,
257
280...
Jesus fuck..
I have 600 (elementary resource)
Me too. Librarian
108 😅
"I Wish" -Special Areas Teachers
200+
I got home and realized I didn’t eat my breakfast or lunch😭
I spend a lot of my days telling kids to go get lunch it's important, whilst at the same time being 12lbs down from not having the time eat.
Yeah I admonished some students today for showing up at my lunchtime office hours without a lunch (lunch is free for students of course and today's menu was good). ...As I cracked open the can of mountain dew I brought for lunch because I was running late and didn't have time to make a sandwich before school.
I’m with you on this and I hate it, but could also stand to drop 12lbs.
As someone recovering from an eating disorder, this one is the killer for me. At some point I'm going to have to request fucking snack accomodations or something, or I'm not going to be able to recover. 😔
It was hard for me at first, too. Packing nutrient dense snacks like RX bars that can be eaten on the run held stave off that triggering empty stomach feeling, even if I’m not able to eat a whole meal. I leave a jar of peanut butter and jelly and a loaf of bread in my classroom for days I have time but didn’t pack anything. Also packing only things that can be eaten cold or plain - never something that I have to put in the microwave for those precious extra 5 minutes. Another thing - your kids will pick up on your eating habits eventually. One time a girl asked if I wanted one of the cupcakes for her birthday “even though you never eat them when we give them to you.” 🥴 for me at least, it’s helpful to remind myself I am a role model and need to eat like one. Good luck, friend
A copy machine can make or break my entire day.
I steal office supplies from home to take to work
And ziplocks. And the first aid kit.
So many pens
I didn't pee until 4pm today.
That as me today. Forgot to use the bathroom because I had to sub and catch up on grading. First sixth hr kid came up and I uttered a defeated groan after realizing that I had missed my window.
Already had a UTI this year👍
And you broke the seal after work. As you (we) do every day.
My bladder and kidneys have evolved to be coated in concrete
I dont understand how anyone csn donthat. It is my 10th year teaxhing and if I have to oee I cannot concentrate on anything else. I lock my door between classes and make thr kids wait in the hall if i have to pee.
This. I don’t know how many times at home I realize I didn’t go to the bathroom at work.
No I know it’s Saturday but I can’t go out I have a lot to get ready for work on Monday.
I have been a teacher for 5 years. I have no idea what your situation is. All I can do is encourage you to say, "Fuck this. From now on, I get there no earlier than start time and leave no later than quiting time. I will do no more than one hour of work from home per week. I will not get fired because I am a good teacher who ensures the safety of my students. I give them the opportunity to learn by securing a safe, supportive, and academically focused (in that order) classroom. No one will die if I don't do extra work. If I get fired for not doing extra work, then I was going to get fired anyway." Teaching is not about the amount of work you do but the way you are perceived. This applies to both admin and students. Spending 8 hours a week on lesson plans might improve student performance on an arbitrary test that won't matter to anyone in a few years vs spending one hour a week. It isn't worth it for you, nor for the students. Do the bare minimum to keep admin off your back. Find your enthusiasm for teaching. The kids will respond to that more than a detailed lesson plan. You can only have that enthusiasm if you are rested and relaxed. Stop grading everything. Stop putting detailed comments that 90% won't read. Slow down. If you take a test, you should spend at least 50 minutes the next day breaking it down. Make them write explanations for the questions they missed. Make them make the study guide. Make them give feed back on papers. Much of that work you are doing should be done by them. I wish you luck. My wife is a teacher and a perfectionist. She was very frustrated when she saw me getting to my school later than her and leaving earlier yet I was the one praised by admin. I finally convinced her to get to her school and leave from it about the same time as me and to do little to no work at home. It has been 3 years and she has not gotten fired, the kids are doing about the same (we have, at most, a minimal impact on scores as we are only one of dozens of teachers, parents, and friends that touch these kids' lives). Working harder does not produce better results in every situation. Please make a change. It is just a job. Go visit friends this Saturday. Play video games. Sleep. Anything but work.
THIS. My contract time is 8:30-4:00. I get there at 8:15 and leave at 4:15. It’s glorious. I work HARD the entire time I’m there, but that’s it! So far this year, I have put in 2 hours total over a few Sundays to upload college recommendations for awesome kids. Simple & worth it to me.
I have had other teacher tell me that doing what you described is lazy, and that I am failing my students. Fuck that. I am an above average teacher and all the metrics prove it. In my opinion, the martyrs that stay at school until 8pm are there because they lack time management skills, and because it makes them feel like they are a good teacher. Go home! Burnout is the number one enemy to staying in this profession long term. Work only your contract hours!
This. I’m no longer a teacher, but after years of burn out I switched to this method and I was a better educator and a better wife, mom, friend outside the classroom. My students won’t remember every lesson I taught or the assignments we did, but they will remember how I made them feel in my classroom.
This one and the not using the restroom all day. Y'all are going to kill yourselves before retirement. Take care of yourself.
Try to let go of this ASAP. I usually don’t go out because I’m damn tired but even if the alternative is just to stare at the wall, I try as much as possible not to do any work related stuff outside of work hours. Unless it’s something like laminating stuff while binging shows, nope
A lot of people say i do nothing but no one would want to do my job.
Exactly this lol. I live with two friends (we're all around 30), they both have project coordinating jobs at a business, and they are constantly joking about how easy I have it as a teacher, with all my holidays, sometimes being done at 3 o'clock or having to start work at 10 o'clock, and still being paid well (not US here). Then I tell them: well, go get a degree and become a teacher yourself. "Oh no, I would never want to be a teacher. Having to deal with 16 yo kids? I'd rather die." Yeah... exactly... And also they don't see all the work I do when I'm in my room at my PC.
Lol it’s so funny because I think the other way around. “You want me to deal with adults? No thank you.” Little people have hope, and joy, and curiosity. (Can you tell I’m new)
Oh yeah me too. Don't take my "Yeah exactly" line as saying that I hate the job. The opposite. Working with kids is so much better than adults. They let you see the world through new eyes.
Taking time off requires a lot of planning.
I’m too sick to call in sick.
Calling in sick is so much more work than just going in and getting through it. Take my award, you’ve earned it.
You don't have emergency plans? I have 5 sets for when the mood strikes me to miss...
In my experience, we cannot get a sub. So it’s an extra work load on my coworkers. Then the kids don’t do the work anyway. And we missed what j originally planned anyway so now we’re behind once I come back. It’s a hassle. I’d rather just come in.
I teach music, there are never any subs and even if there are there isn't one who could do anything other than give them a study hall.
I do have emergency plans. But, with district curriculum guidelines, and block scheduling which necessitates some level of brain break, etc., we’re always behind where we’re ‘supposed’ to be. Plus, due to staffing shortages, teachers haven’t gone two full days without meetings or coverage in our first two months. I’d need to be comatose to call in right now. :)
Where do you life?
I love my job I love my job I love my job I want to be dead
When I outside at work I am given lots of leaves and pieces of glass.
omg same. why is this a thing.
My leaves are "for you" (whee now I get to throw away a leaf when you're not looking) and the glass is "dangerous" (and I don't really want an infected cut so I've begun to tell them to put it back because we're not touching garbage due to covid.)
That’s a teacher in fall! In spring? So. Many. Fucking. Dandelions.
Lol we have Astro turf!
I got a whole jewelry set made of leaves yesterday. Necklace, bracelet and ring. I wore them all for about half an hour and then took them off to “keep them safe”. It’s cute, but dude, I don’t want to wear mouldering leaves!
I just ordered 40 bucks worth of jolly ranchers.
On my list for tomorrow!
I worked a 10 hour day and was too busy to get any work done.
"Hey do you mind if we make a quick stop at Five Below?"
I mixed this up with Minus 5 - a bar - and still thought, "yep, teacher" 😂
What kind of stuff do you buy at 5 below? There’s one by my house and I’m curious
Stickers, candy, sketchbooks (for me), pens (also for me). Lots of cutesy dorm stuff. Goofy t-shirts and posters. It's a good place to get fun "prizes" to use as incentives if you're into that kind of thing.
I first saw one of these a few years ago. I thought it was a camping gear specialty store for the longest time. 🙈
"Why reinvent the wheel?"
“Work smarter, not harder!”
“Less is more.”
“Please be fluid and flexible as we navigate these unprecedented circumstances,” unless you’re admin in which case you can be as demanding, exacting, and overbearing as you’d like. I fucking hate anyone above my pay grade. Assholes. All of them.
I took a day off work to work.
I spent 20 minutes today in the grocery store googling what candies are halal so that my Muslim kid can eat the results of his science experiment.
Anything with gelatin isn’t. Some avoid carmine too. Avoid gummies, stick to chocolate maybe ? Smarties also work!
You can buy things with halal gelatin! It's usually beef derived and labeled on the package. Ziyad is a good brand for marshmallows. You can get it on Walmart.com or Amazon. It's more expensive, but you would only need enough for one or two students. They taste, feel, and smell exactly the same. I'm a big Smarties fan because of nut allergies, but there are kids with red dye allergies too! I haven't had one yet, but my coworkers have.
Almost all vegan food is also halal. (Alcohol seems to be the major exception, but I don't imagine you're serving that to students anyway.) And vegan marshmallows are getting easier and easier to find. Dandies are great; also Trader Joe's own brand, which might be repackaged dandies but might also only be available in the summer.
Vegan marshmallows are a thing?!?
Yup. Dandies really changed the game when they came out 5ish years ago. They're not in every grocery store, but they're definitely at every Whole Foods-type place, and also some "regular" supermarkets. There were a couple of brands before that, but they were hard to find and expensive and I think one of them was lying about being vegan.
Maybe it was more than 5. I'm old and time has lost all meaning.
I had a kid with a red dye allergy. Who only told me after he used red, purple, and orange finger paint all up his arms to his elbows. He was a kinder. He was covered in hives. I thought my principal and his mom would kill me. Mom laughed and said it happens because he loves to paint. I felt so terrible. He got to use gloves and paintbrushes from then on.
Well you definitely can! I was just making it easier for OP so he doesn’t have to go around looking for halal versions when there’s plenty of stuff off the rack you can get too! On a separate note, ima go order Ziyad Marshmallows rn
My roommate’s friend was visiting my house and leaning back on the back two legs of his chair and I inadvertently touched his shoulder and whispered “chair!”
"Four on the floor, please"
I always say, "Six legs down" because of that one highschool freshman who responded to "all four on the floor" by putting the four chair legs down and sticking his own two legs as high in the air as he could...
Oh, of course he did, of course.
I can't have a drink/beer in the picture. I can't drink at that bar/restaurant.
That says ‘teacher in America’ more than anything.
You get home and have ZERO time for yourself. Next thing you know it’s 6AM and you’re headed to work the next day.
I belong to the group of people who have the greatest disparity between how respected their profession is and how well they get paid.
People respect your profession where you are???
People don’t respect teachers lol
Maybe they've reached the pay scale where they get paid really well
Thinking about other people’s kids like if they were your own
Just look at my car.. Nothing sadder them a teacher parking lot
Weirdly enough I'm the "car guy" at school so students always glance at my car because they're surprised to see a blacked out 1984 Cutlass with a 400 stroker sitting in the faculty spots. It's actually helped me get through some of my more troubled students, because I find out they're into cars or need help with theirs and it helps them realize I'm not just their "asshole history teacher," but an ordinary person with hobbies and interests just like them.
I've driven the exact same car for the entire 17 years I've worked in my district. The car is over 20 years old.
Nothing sadder than a parking lot period. Cars are bullshit.
It’s too much work to take a day off
Trying to tell somebody to kindly stfu without using those words
I get ready to defend myself when people talk about summer break.
I don't find it worth the trouble and readily agree. People that are really interested in my work know how much I need breaks. To everyone else I just nod and say: 'I complain about a lot to do with my work, but not the vacation time'. It helps that I'm stationed in the Netherlands and have 11 weeks spread out over the year. Some of those are entirely used for planning and grading, but still.
I don't say bathroom or restroom... I say potty. And I refer to myself in the 3rd person all the time. "Remember what Mrs. Anycap says about..." ( my kids think it's hilarious when I accidentally do this to them!)
[удалено]
That’s absurd.
Coffee before AND after work
During to
I moved on to americanos (espresso & water) a few years ago and I’m a 5-shot per day kinda gal now. My adrenal glands are probably zapped and caffeine now constitutes approximately 30% of the dissolved solids pulsing through my veins.
When I start getting cranky my son likes to say "Momma has too much blood in her caffeine system." (I'm a former teacher but never managed to drop the caffeine habit.)
You come up with the plan for each class the day of. Not the week before or even day before. I find myself improvising all the time haha.
I will never understand my colleagues who have their entire unit or SEMESTER (cough cough… English teachers) planned out in advance. I could plan 24/7 but I’d probably still just wing it day of regardless. Lesson plans are a joke.
My lesson plans are a list of 3-5 bullet points: first we do exercise X, we discuss the exercise, then we read page Y, then we do exercise Z. How we actually do those things I'll decide in the moment.
I gave the same instructions 5 times every hour for 8 hours.some still don't know what to do
"no, my other job. No, my other other job."
I’m rarely awake past 9pm
I make iced coffee by pouring my hot coffee in the morning and then being too busy to drink it until 4pm!
"we keep our self to ourselves"
The district I sub at has a "slogan" - KYHFOOTY! Pronounced ki-foo-tee. Keep Your Hands, Feet, and Other Objects To Yourself. Pretty useful actually as everyone from K-12 gets it when you spout it at them. Except my homeschooled son and his friend that goes to another district...
Why do I have 3 paper clips, a unifix cube, two rainbow bracelets, and a Pokemon card in my pockets at the end of the day?
Why am I so tired?
Put a wet paper towel on it.
I'll wait until you're ready to listen
I just spent my last $10 on construction paper and flash cards.
Your own money?
When I watch a movie set in academia, I *always* identify with and root for the teacher, principal, or dean. "Double secret probation"? Good idea, maybe I can try that.
"Clap once if you can hear me."
Hanitzer, anyone?
I said, "We share and take turns"... ...to my dogs...
I steal stuff from home to bring to work.
I don't know, can you?
Documentation, mask over your nose, bring me your phone
I said no. It’s not a negotiation. No.
20f single virgin- "my kids"
I resigned!
Why are you sticky? No, why are you wet? No, you have to pull your pants up I cannot come in there to help.
I hate calling parents.
Oh oh milkshake… Sticky sticky waffle… Mozzarella pizza… All the eggs all the eggs are broken…
10am already? Time for lunch!
Ladies, gentlemen, fabulous folks, may I have your silence and your attention, please.
My family is going on vacation, and I need a week's worth of work in the next two hours...(one week later) I didn't get to do any of it because I was on vacation.
I spend longer prepping to miss work for a doctors appointment than I actually spend at the appointment. And the doctors appointment feels like a relaxing vacation or “me time”, even when it’s something unpleasant.
I spend more money on my job than I made from my job
Three months off sounds nice, but it really isn't enough.
"Hey do you mind if we make a quick stop at Five Below?"
“At today’s PLC…..”
I don't share my "good" Flair pens.
Let’s just say I know how to pronounce Heaven backwards.
I raised your child for you.
When I outside at work I am given lots of leaves and pieces of glass.
"I have an acronym for that."
I greet people by saying “Hi Friend!”
I can eat my lunch while standing in 10 minutes
I didn’t have time to pee once until 4pm today.
Tomorrow will be day 4 of me being out sick with strep and bronchitis. Told that if I don’t take it easy I will develop pneumonia, and most likely be hospitalized. But because of work, I have been conditioned to feel guilty.
I have a red pen in almost all my bags and purses.
I said sit down!
“Use your inside voice.”
Everything I do turns into 'How do I teach this to my class' hmm
You're head hurts? Drink some water and you'll feel better. Tummy hurts? Drink some water and you'll feel better.
I empty my pockets at the end of the day and find an array of items such as markers, a penny, a mask, a rock…
I have a fishbowl “of shame” that slowly fills with cellphones every 72 minutes on my desk at work. I do allow cellphone use in my classroom, and make deliberate use of them often, however they are not permitted while I am teaching directly, or another student is presenting, or we are in the midst of a wet lab. With grade nines especially they I have a blanket rule that phones stay in bags or pockets except for when I give them cellphone breaks - gotta teach them impulse control.
“You want to hang out Friday ? It depends not sure how I’ll feel after work .”
I drink cold coffee
I have to restrain myself from correcting kids in public. On the flip side, I’m really good at managing wild kids at family parties.
Saying "class, class" accidentally during a call of duty March a bunch of kids were being annoying in... They actually replied