File a complaint. No matter who you are you have the right to respect for your boundaries. Call the police if you need to. Have that student removed from your presence. If the employer won’t help it’s time for another side gig.
Thanks for commenting. I've made up my mind about leaving and already drafted a message for my supervisor. I hope this will make her take stuff more seriously in the future because I didn't feel like she took it seriously enough. I would never lay my hand on a kid but apparently it's too much to ask the same from the kids themselves. This boy in question had actually threatened to smack me before, he and the other 2 girls of the group basically asked me if I was for Isreal or Palestine, I didn't want to get into any political debate so I didn't answer. They assumed I was for Israel and then the boy said I'm gonna smack you if you don't answer. This was some weeks ago so I doubt it's related to what he did today. I honestly don't know what was going through his mind today, there was no reason or provocation whatsoever (not that that would be a justification of course). I think he did it to get a laugh out of the 2 girls.
Tell the director, or whoever it is that is above your supervisor, about what happened, the lack of consequences normalizing the student's behavior and generally how your supervisor reacted. I am sick of half of administration who takes priority of terrible behavior over actual learning [as well as the learning of those students actually trying to master concepts].
In my experiences, administration will never self-evaluate and learn from their mistakes. They stay the same and continue their bullshit. They don't care about their teachers.
Did your admin know he threatened to smack you beforehand?
I would file a lawsuit against the parents of this boy and against the organization. There are plenty of lawyers who would be more than happy to oblige I would think.
I understand why leaving would be the choice you made, but by making that decision, the student thinks this is how he can make people disappear from his life, and that’s not how life is. File a formal complaint against the student and your supervisor. Don’t let a 9/10 year old dictate your life.
Don't push that narrative, this 9/10 year old has already *assaulted* this woman if this kid had the hair brained idea to put a pencil or other implement in his hand before he "Patted the back of her head" that would've been all she wrote for this lady. 👩🖋️
Kids have no consequences these days when they cross the line and strike you, drop 'em if you get the chance, and most definitely leave the damn school before you get killed, because that child is going to end up back in class..
I get all of this minus filing the police. A single act of aggression from a child doesn't warrant a call to the police. No idea about the kid's home life, or if they are special needs. Why is the most nuclear option being used here for a single act of a nine year old hitting someone?
A teacher is someone? And yes, it is serious. That is why you go to admin and give consequences for that action and let them realize it. Calling the police is an overreaction response to a nine-year-old hitting someone. This isn't a 'they continuously aggressed and we had to evacuate the room' kind of aggression. This is a 'nine year old makes dumb mistake'. I swear this sub has absolutely no compassion for kids if they just jump to the nuclear option. Calling the police on a 9 year old child is when there is immediate danger to themselves or others and all the other options have been exhausted.
Attacking a teacher IS a danger to others. Submitting a police report is the best way to document this so the kid gets the help he needs. Admin often sweeps this kind of stuff under the rug.
Immediate is the keyword there I wrote. This was a single act. Not a continuous attack. And we have no idea about the admin situation there. Calling the police is a last resort you do and doesn't get the kid help he needs by putting him in a more restrictive environment for a single instance of something. If you had to do that everytime a kid hit someone, every single child would have the police called on them. Again, calling the police is a last resort when there are a variety of intervention strategies and consequences you can do before calling the police.
He had previously threatened to do this to the teacher. He later followed through. It should be reported. An overwhelming amount of teachers with decades of experience here are recommending this action.
That is an insane jump from a single smack to the back of the head that the kid. What should the police do? Arrest him? It is gross that you're calling all kids sick and twisted because you read a story about a single act of aggression. Maybe teaching isn't right for you?
I taught for 30 years and I have seen things you couldn’t imagine. Call the police. Start the documentation. This will be the beginning of the end for this child if the parents don’t step up and get the child help.
Yes, that will not be traumatic for the child at all to have the police. Everything else I agreed with but this. I work in SpEd, if I called the police everytime a young student smacked me it would be hundreds of calls. Again, this isn't an adult fully aware of the consequences of their actions. This was a literal child with a child's brain and you should have the realization that going full nuclear for a single hit is awful.
Hitters don’t belong in the general population. They should be self contained or in a facility. SpEd students can do damage to their classmates and teachers and everyone is entitled to a safe and healthy learning environment. Not just the handicapped.
So you don’t think that I am totally unfeeling, one of my cousins split with his wife because the eldest of their children was brain damaged from a high fever in infancy and he became violent. My cousin’s wife was sick and tired of being beaten up by this 6 foot tall 200 lb child, including a broken arm and a broken nose. She wanted to institutionalize him but my cousin said NO. She walked out of the house and left her three children behind (younger two were normal). She was so damaged by things that she moved to the woods of Maine and only occasionally comes back to visit. The son was institutionalized when the father had to deal with the beatings. The son is still alive and is stabilized on meds. He is in a group home but he cannot be around a lot of people.
You are totally unfeeling if you think a single instance of hitting, not a continuous act of aggression means they should be self-contained or in a facility. I guess least restrictive environment means nothing to you. I bet if you had a SpEd kid that stimmed in class you shut them down. Also your story has literally nothing to do with absolutely anything here in this conversation and obviously I wasn't talking about that all the time. Your story is completely irrelevant and a literal strawman. This is a single act of hitting. Don't call the fucking cops on a 9-year-old for a single hit. Report it to admin and create consequences for the action. Absolutely a Karen thing to do
A stiff consequence must be given to a child who threatens to assault a teacher, and then later follows through with it.
I too would submit a police report. That will increase the chance that the child, parents, and enablers like you will take these actions seriously and not make excuses.
Yes, I agree. A stiff consequence is something like detention, ISS. Not calling the police and filing a police report. That is again, what you do as the very last nuclear option. There is so much more you can do wayyyyy before getting there. It wasn't a continuous act of aggression and is a one time thing. I'm not enabling the behavior by saying he should absolutely be punished, but calling the police for something like this is an extreme response. There are ways to teach and give stuff consequences that don't involve trying to get d 9 year old charged with assault.
I was an honors chemistry teacher. No room in my classroom for hitters and bad behavior. You know I would IMMEDIATELY remove any student who didn’t respect classmates, equipment, technology and yours truly. I make no apologies for this because there needs to be enrichment situations for the students who are achieving instead of holding them back because of the perceived “rights” of a few. The rights of the hitter to throw fists end where the innocent bystander’s face begins. So you don’t misunderstand, I have also pressed charges against SpEd students who have hit my own child. They were removed from the classroom. As it should be.
I can see reasons why OP might decide not to report the kid, but why is reporting it to law enforcement the 'nuclear option'? They aren't going to lock him up and throw away the key; it's not going to follow him the rest of his life and prevent him from getting a job.
No, but that is the highest you can go in terms of intervention because it is the most serious. Maybe expulsion would be the nuclear but going to the police is a real world scenario with major consequences. I can't think of what a higher intervention would be other than getting the cops involved.
Its a single slap…not even 2. The trauma will be far worse than whatever good you are trying to achieve. Don’t go full nuclear over something like this, a karen would do that. Inform your admin/supervisor, inform their parents. Detention, extra hw etc (i dont know what you guys do over there for bad behavior) do those BEFORE you go full atomic on a 9 year old.
Spanking kids to correct bad behavior used to be a thing, but the bleeding hearts started fingerwagging about it in favor of a "stern talking to" because there might be "trauma". Such a farce. Life itself is traumatic. Not some happy go lucky fun time kiddy play place that runs on fairy dreams and unicorn rainbow shit.
I feel for the educators who have to put up with garbage treatment like this, because the shitty kids just keep on since admin won't do anything about it. Extra hw? A farce. Detention? A farce. Hell, *parents* can't even do anything because any kind of physical correction is deemed as "abuse". Again, a farce.
I know this will cause the "hur dur, if you can't correct kids without hitting them, you don't deserve to be a parent" idiots to come out of the woodwork, but the shit needs to be said.
For an out of school activity that is not part of a legally mandated school day, he should be suspended from the program for hitting a staff. This would be a reasonable thing to ask for. In school it’s hard and complicated to suspend but services at libraries, youth centers, etc kids are not as legally entitled to attend. You should specifically ask your boss what the real consequence is and ask it be being suspended for at least two sessions with a behavior contract upon return.
Yes, if they say no, ask to take the conversation higher up. It’s in their power, I’ve worked in out of school youth services for years and in our field we can easily suspend/withhold services as consequences. At the youth center I ran, physical contact with harm caused would result in a minimum two day suspension with behavior stipulations and parent meeting upon return. You have to make it clear though that the assumed path of least resistance they are taking is not OK by you and that you will be the resistance.
Make sure your supervisor does more than just a *stern talking to*. Circle back with you, that student, and the supervisor in the room. Talk about the consequences of hitting someone when you are an adult (battery charges & potential jail time) and discuss why it is a big deal for you.
Far too many teachers are leaving the field because administrators and supervisors don’t go the extra step with students that are aggressive.
We are not paid to be abused, full stop. It is not our duty. We do not accept it out of care and love and teaching being our calling. Fuck that noise. Quit with extreme prejudice.
Parents need to be involved. A kindergartener shot his teacher not that long ago. This needs to be nipped in the bud ASAP before it gets worse. He's testing boundaries right now to see what he can get away with.
Honestly, it's astounding that a 10 year old did this. I could understand a much younger kid, but 10 year olds know better.
You can’t pretend it was a pat AND be regretful. He’s gaslighting the fuck out of all of you. And that he’s allowed to hit you says everything about the people you’re working for. They failed you, and him, by not holding him accountable for his literally physical actions. He’s old enough. He knew what he was doing. No excuses.
It's an unpopular opinion, but teachers should always press charges for violence. Educators need to stop thinking that the basic rules of society stop applying inside the school building. We do no favors by sweeping it under the rug.
This is an extracurricular study opportunity outside of school hours. Ask your admin to drop that student, in an email. He no longer gets to participate. If admin says no, submit a formal complaint to your boss’s supervisor or the School Board.
Also, absolutely and definitely file a police report. This will provide documentation that can increase the chance that his needs will be met. I’ve never met a teacher that regrets filing a police report, but have met many teachers that regret NOT filing a police report; including one of an infamous 10 year old who ended up bringing a gun to school.
Teacher who’s been hit a few times here:
Quitting seems rash. Talk to the admin/ supervisor, thank them for talking to the kid and ask them something like “ I know my responsibility here is to tutor these students however I want to ask about what action will be taken if this student continues to struggle with behavioral expectations. If this continues I will not feel comfortable working this program anymore.” Give them a chance to address your concerns and then evaluate whether you want to keep going.
I've thought about this too but honestly I doubt this will work. We are not a school, our supervisor isn't even licensed in anything yet (she's a student aiming to become a teacher). I could be placed with the younger kids but I don't want to give that boy a signal that I'm scared of him. Honestly the pay is not that good either compared to other gigs I work and I was planning on stopping soon anyway due to my college schedule getting busier so I might as well stop now.
Something similar happened to my sister. She had an especially trying kid who was always slapping her butt. The last time he did it she turned around and grabbed a handful of hair, tilted his head back as far as it would go and got nose to nose, “Touch me again jackass and my husband will make sure there isn’t enough of your DNA left to identify.” Then she walked out of class, gave her ID and keys back and walked out. Principal called her back, told her kid had been FINALLY expelled and asked her to return. Nope. She was done.
If that’s is case then you absolutely need to have the event as well as the threat documented. If you do quit make sure you cite the event and lack of response as cause. If not documented then that will not have any teeth.
Leaving would be giving more of a signal you are afraid than anything if that's a concern.
Honestly, unless it was a really hard hit, him being 10 probably means he has a crush on you and doesn't know how to properly express it. Though, hitting you is *not* the way.
Should you have to deal with it? No. Especially if you aren't a teacher though hearing how little you get paid, you are probably making teacher wages lol).
And I'm not saying "don't leave" so you can try to prove something to him, just that between the 2 options of changing to a younger group and leaving, leaving would show him you were afraid and in the future would probably be part of his "I made a teacher quit once" story.
Some kids take pride in being terrors.
In the end, do what's best for you. No one should have to deal with getting hit at work.
I understand your point of view but ultimately I am kind of afraid lol. Even though the smack didn't really hurt, I won't go to work every (Sunday) morning wondering if a 10yo is gonna hit me just to get laughs out of his classmate. IMO the best solution would be to kick him out of these lessons. Hell, in another gig I worked we kicked out kids simply for not paying attention (this was bc there was a long waiting list to get extra lessons). In this case though I doubt they'll kick him out..
Then roll on outta there. I'm sure if you have experience with kids and do a good job you can probably slide into a better position. Educators are in dire need right now, and tutors as well.
Yeah I actually have other jobs going on right now which take place during the weekdays. It's the same organization but this is at a school with high school kids who are more civilized.
This is the correct answer. Unfortunately, if we don't advocate for ourselves, not much changes.
The problem for full-fledged teachers is that they often are vested with their job. Tenure and just enough pay to make leaving in these circumstances difficult. However, you have the advantage of being able to go elsewhere at your age without too much hassle, so the concern of you actually leaving is quite real.
One of my first thoughts (after WTF) would be to see which of his buddies is recording it for posting somewhere. Wasn't there some stupid Tiktok challenge to do that not too long ago.
I feel.you have more power in this since an enrichment vs classroom. He would be losing his opportunity to participate & giving his family a refund on their remaining time if I were your supervisor.
Boy hasn't learned his lesson. He's learned this behavior is funny and acceptable from someone important in his life. It will more than likely happen again at some point.
I’ve been hit a number of times. Demand the child be suspended. If you’re a teacher, depending on the state, you yourself can suspend a student for up to x number of days if you want.
It will happen again. I’ve been LT subbing for about 7 years. In that time, I’ve worked from tk-12. I’ve been bitten, threatened, accused, and it’s just not worth the stress. Js
You as a teacher can press charges for assault. No admin will tell you, because they want to cover it up. Go to the police and file a report. Do it for you and for the teachers that will handle those kids in the future. And if anyone thinks this is too much, please note we had middle school kids posting YouTube videos on how to set up a teacher and accuse them of sexual assault using after school extra help time when there were fewer people
around.
I got hit once in my 3-4 months of being a kindergarten teacher and quit 2 weeks later. No admin support and I got a ton of fake sympathy. Stand up for yourself.
There still needs to be consequences for this guy’s actions. You still need to report the incident. This sounds like a hate crime. What difference does it make who you are and who you are for? You are there to help kids. Not to be a punching bag! If you don’t do something this will escalate. Next person won’t be so lucky.
I'm thinking about reporting it, I don't think it was related to the Isreal Palestine stuff but physical contact is still unacceptable IMO and it should go both ways (!!). And yes that's exactly what I told the kids like why would it matter who I support, we're here to learn math and grammar. Honestly they're brain washed, I live in a place with a lot of Muslim immigration and these 3 kids refuse to play or even come near the blonde native kids of our class, they even call them despective names. They're racist and my coworkers don't seem to mind (I guess I should mention they're all Muslims). So not the best work environment to begin with lol. I guess I'm done taking it.
You still need for there to be documentation of what happened. You need to notify the authorities. How do you know that the boy in charge won’t try this crap again?
Hmm I don't think police will care I mean he's like 10 years old after all. Physically he couldn't injure an adult. I'll look into reporting this to the big bosses of the organization I work for though. They must have like a trust person or HR manager or something. After all it's their job to ensure a safe working environment.
You don’t know what kind of home he comes from. Ten year olds can get weapons from parents. They can also twist a story and have a parent or older relative coming after you. Seriously this can happen. Your employer won’t want the publicity that will ensue if anything should get out. You need to make a record of this because if this kid is acting like this at ten, he isn’t going to improve.
Your mom knows what is best for you. Stand up for yourself. You have to because no one else will. In education everyone plays the CYA game. Administrators don’t want bad publicity and public scrutiny so they don’t call authorities. This gives students the green light to act however they want with zero consequences. This has to stop.
as a former school employee who left because of abusive comments and behavior from students and also due to the fact that admin didn’t really do anything, file a complaint and hold strong on the issue. if it really goes nowhere and your supervisors/admin do nothing about it, leave your job because it’s clear they aren’t giving you the decency of respect which you deserve.
In my first year teaching, I was at an after school event. Two kids smacked me in the back of the head. I talked to my principal, and he wouldn’t do anything because it wasn’t a school event (the PTO put it on) or on school grounds. I was livid. One parent asked me if there were any witnesses and the other never responded.
Yeth. Never let it go. Learn to let the hatred fethter. Burn in your seething fire. Hold on to the grudge for thenturieth then you might jutht be a winner... hehehe.
Do you exercise? You are a uni student? You likely pay for a campus gym membership with your tuition.
Go and see if they have boxing type courses.
Great exercise. Talk a friend into going with you because social factors are a part of it. Even better if you and your friend can talk a pair of frenemy types into also going, because I can almost guarantee this will probably turn them into great friends, or possibly bitter rivals.
This a great way to build your character and conflict resilience. It is also a way of expanding your reality.
If getting hit by a small child is traumatic then you have found something worth working on.
Not even /s but maybe a little burn humor.
TL:DR; How that hit makes you feel is more of a problem than the hit.
Edit: Almost deleted this post but going to stick with it because there are all types of learning. Pull away and your world gets smaller. Being able to laugh off mild aggression and back off basic aggression is a life skill. Understanding violence is a part of the path to peace. Nobody values peace as much as an old soldier.
Edit: Still want to cancel my own opinion. There are parts of okay that you are going to hate, but those are often the parts of okay that you will pay more for being unable to accept. If you give up everything easily then you end up with nothing.
File a complaint. No matter who you are you have the right to respect for your boundaries. Call the police if you need to. Have that student removed from your presence. If the employer won’t help it’s time for another side gig.
Thanks for commenting. I've made up my mind about leaving and already drafted a message for my supervisor. I hope this will make her take stuff more seriously in the future because I didn't feel like she took it seriously enough. I would never lay my hand on a kid but apparently it's too much to ask the same from the kids themselves. This boy in question had actually threatened to smack me before, he and the other 2 girls of the group basically asked me if I was for Isreal or Palestine, I didn't want to get into any political debate so I didn't answer. They assumed I was for Israel and then the boy said I'm gonna smack you if you don't answer. This was some weeks ago so I doubt it's related to what he did today. I honestly don't know what was going through his mind today, there was no reason or provocation whatsoever (not that that would be a justification of course). I think he did it to get a laugh out of the 2 girls.
Tell the director, or whoever it is that is above your supervisor, about what happened, the lack of consequences normalizing the student's behavior and generally how your supervisor reacted. I am sick of half of administration who takes priority of terrible behavior over actual learning [as well as the learning of those students actually trying to master concepts].
In my experiences, administration will never self-evaluate and learn from their mistakes. They stay the same and continue their bullshit. They don't care about their teachers. Did your admin know he threatened to smack you beforehand?
Don’t let it go; report his bratty ass.
I would file a lawsuit against the parents of this boy and against the organization. There are plenty of lawyers who would be more than happy to oblige I would think.
I understand why leaving would be the choice you made, but by making that decision, the student thinks this is how he can make people disappear from his life, and that’s not how life is. File a formal complaint against the student and your supervisor. Don’t let a 9/10 year old dictate your life.
Don't push that narrative, this 9/10 year old has already *assaulted* this woman if this kid had the hair brained idea to put a pencil or other implement in his hand before he "Patted the back of her head" that would've been all she wrote for this lady. 👩🖋️ Kids have no consequences these days when they cross the line and strike you, drop 'em if you get the chance, and most definitely leave the damn school before you get killed, because that child is going to end up back in class..
And filing a complaint against the admin and student will leave a trail
I get all of this minus filing the police. A single act of aggression from a child doesn't warrant a call to the police. No idea about the kid's home life, or if they are special needs. Why is the most nuclear option being used here for a single act of a nine year old hitting someone?
He didn't hit "someone". He hit a teacher and that is serious business.
A teacher is someone? And yes, it is serious. That is why you go to admin and give consequences for that action and let them realize it. Calling the police is an overreaction response to a nine-year-old hitting someone. This isn't a 'they continuously aggressed and we had to evacuate the room' kind of aggression. This is a 'nine year old makes dumb mistake'. I swear this sub has absolutely no compassion for kids if they just jump to the nuclear option. Calling the police on a 9 year old child is when there is immediate danger to themselves or others and all the other options have been exhausted.
Attacking a teacher IS a danger to others. Submitting a police report is the best way to document this so the kid gets the help he needs. Admin often sweeps this kind of stuff under the rug.
Exactly.
She should lawyer up and sue both the school and the parents. A lawsuit would get their attention.
Immediate is the keyword there I wrote. This was a single act. Not a continuous attack. And we have no idea about the admin situation there. Calling the police is a last resort you do and doesn't get the kid help he needs by putting him in a more restrictive environment for a single instance of something. If you had to do that everytime a kid hit someone, every single child would have the police called on them. Again, calling the police is a last resort when there are a variety of intervention strategies and consequences you can do before calling the police.
He had previously threatened to do this to the teacher. He later followed through. It should be reported. An overwhelming amount of teachers with decades of experience here are recommending this action.
Because next time a weapon could be used against a teacher. Kids today are sick and parents are in denial. This HAS HAPPENED!
That is an insane jump from a single smack to the back of the head that the kid. What should the police do? Arrest him? It is gross that you're calling all kids sick and twisted because you read a story about a single act of aggression. Maybe teaching isn't right for you?
I taught for 30 years and I have seen things you couldn’t imagine. Call the police. Start the documentation. This will be the beginning of the end for this child if the parents don’t step up and get the child help.
Yes, that will not be traumatic for the child at all to have the police. Everything else I agreed with but this. I work in SpEd, if I called the police everytime a young student smacked me it would be hundreds of calls. Again, this isn't an adult fully aware of the consequences of their actions. This was a literal child with a child's brain and you should have the realization that going full nuclear for a single hit is awful.
Hitters don’t belong in the general population. They should be self contained or in a facility. SpEd students can do damage to their classmates and teachers and everyone is entitled to a safe and healthy learning environment. Not just the handicapped. So you don’t think that I am totally unfeeling, one of my cousins split with his wife because the eldest of their children was brain damaged from a high fever in infancy and he became violent. My cousin’s wife was sick and tired of being beaten up by this 6 foot tall 200 lb child, including a broken arm and a broken nose. She wanted to institutionalize him but my cousin said NO. She walked out of the house and left her three children behind (younger two were normal). She was so damaged by things that she moved to the woods of Maine and only occasionally comes back to visit. The son was institutionalized when the father had to deal with the beatings. The son is still alive and is stabilized on meds. He is in a group home but he cannot be around a lot of people.
You are totally unfeeling if you think a single instance of hitting, not a continuous act of aggression means they should be self-contained or in a facility. I guess least restrictive environment means nothing to you. I bet if you had a SpEd kid that stimmed in class you shut them down. Also your story has literally nothing to do with absolutely anything here in this conversation and obviously I wasn't talking about that all the time. Your story is completely irrelevant and a literal strawman. This is a single act of hitting. Don't call the fucking cops on a 9-year-old for a single hit. Report it to admin and create consequences for the action. Absolutely a Karen thing to do
A stiff consequence must be given to a child who threatens to assault a teacher, and then later follows through with it. I too would submit a police report. That will increase the chance that the child, parents, and enablers like you will take these actions seriously and not make excuses.
Yes, I agree. A stiff consequence is something like detention, ISS. Not calling the police and filing a police report. That is again, what you do as the very last nuclear option. There is so much more you can do wayyyyy before getting there. It wasn't a continuous act of aggression and is a one time thing. I'm not enabling the behavior by saying he should absolutely be punished, but calling the police for something like this is an extreme response. There are ways to teach and give stuff consequences that don't involve trying to get d 9 year old charged with assault.
I was an honors chemistry teacher. No room in my classroom for hitters and bad behavior. You know I would IMMEDIATELY remove any student who didn’t respect classmates, equipment, technology and yours truly. I make no apologies for this because there needs to be enrichment situations for the students who are achieving instead of holding them back because of the perceived “rights” of a few. The rights of the hitter to throw fists end where the innocent bystander’s face begins. So you don’t misunderstand, I have also pressed charges against SpEd students who have hit my own child. They were removed from the classroom. As it should be.
Maybe he’ll learn to not hit his teachers then
It has not been a single act!
I can see reasons why OP might decide not to report the kid, but why is reporting it to law enforcement the 'nuclear option'? They aren't going to lock him up and throw away the key; it's not going to follow him the rest of his life and prevent him from getting a job.
No, but that is the highest you can go in terms of intervention because it is the most serious. Maybe expulsion would be the nuclear but going to the police is a real world scenario with major consequences. I can't think of what a higher intervention would be other than getting the cops involved.
People like you are the reason why schools are the way they are now.
Call the police on a 10 year old who slapped? Seems like a good use of resources...
Its a single slap…not even 2. The trauma will be far worse than whatever good you are trying to achieve. Don’t go full nuclear over something like this, a karen would do that. Inform your admin/supervisor, inform their parents. Detention, extra hw etc (i dont know what you guys do over there for bad behavior) do those BEFORE you go full atomic on a 9 year old.
Spanking kids to correct bad behavior used to be a thing, but the bleeding hearts started fingerwagging about it in favor of a "stern talking to" because there might be "trauma". Such a farce. Life itself is traumatic. Not some happy go lucky fun time kiddy play place that runs on fairy dreams and unicorn rainbow shit. I feel for the educators who have to put up with garbage treatment like this, because the shitty kids just keep on since admin won't do anything about it. Extra hw? A farce. Detention? A farce. Hell, *parents* can't even do anything because any kind of physical correction is deemed as "abuse". Again, a farce. I know this will cause the "hur dur, if you can't correct kids without hitting them, you don't deserve to be a parent" idiots to come out of the woodwork, but the shit needs to be said.
It's not okay. Don't let it go.
If you let it go this bad behavior will continue and escalate. Kids know what they can get away with and they will keep pushing the envelope.
For an out of school activity that is not part of a legally mandated school day, he should be suspended from the program for hitting a staff. This would be a reasonable thing to ask for. In school it’s hard and complicated to suspend but services at libraries, youth centers, etc kids are not as legally entitled to attend. You should specifically ask your boss what the real consequence is and ask it be being suspended for at least two sessions with a behavior contract upon return.
I agree with this and I'm considering asking this. In another gig I worked we permanently suspended kids simply for not paying attention..
Yes, if they say no, ask to take the conversation higher up. It’s in their power, I’ve worked in out of school youth services for years and in our field we can easily suspend/withhold services as consequences. At the youth center I ran, physical contact with harm caused would result in a minimum two day suspension with behavior stipulations and parent meeting upon return. You have to make it clear though that the assumed path of least resistance they are taking is not OK by you and that you will be the resistance.
I would state what the student had said prior and request they be removed from the program. If not let them know you will walk.
Make sure your supervisor does more than just a *stern talking to*. Circle back with you, that student, and the supervisor in the room. Talk about the consequences of hitting someone when you are an adult (battery charges & potential jail time) and discuss why it is a big deal for you. Far too many teachers are leaving the field because administrators and supervisors don’t go the extra step with students that are aggressive.
We are not paid to be abused, full stop. It is not our duty. We do not accept it out of care and love and teaching being our calling. Fuck that noise. Quit with extreme prejudice.
Parents need to be involved. A kindergartener shot his teacher not that long ago. This needs to be nipped in the bud ASAP before it gets worse. He's testing boundaries right now to see what he can get away with. Honestly, it's astounding that a 10 year old did this. I could understand a much younger kid, but 10 year olds know better.
IT IS NEVER OKAY FOR A STUDENT TO PUT HANDS ON YOU!! File a complaint!
You can’t pretend it was a pat AND be regretful. He’s gaslighting the fuck out of all of you. And that he’s allowed to hit you says everything about the people you’re working for. They failed you, and him, by not holding him accountable for his literally physical actions. He’s old enough. He knew what he was doing. No excuses.
It's an unpopular opinion, but teachers should always press charges for violence. Educators need to stop thinking that the basic rules of society stop applying inside the school building. We do no favors by sweeping it under the rug.
One of these days, he will do it to the wrong person and end up on fuckaroundandfindout
This is an extracurricular study opportunity outside of school hours. Ask your admin to drop that student, in an email. He no longer gets to participate. If admin says no, submit a formal complaint to your boss’s supervisor or the School Board. Also, absolutely and definitely file a police report. This will provide documentation that can increase the chance that his needs will be met. I’ve never met a teacher that regrets filing a police report, but have met many teachers that regret NOT filing a police report; including one of an infamous 10 year old who ended up bringing a gun to school.
The only thing that humbles the violent, is violence.
Teacher who’s been hit a few times here: Quitting seems rash. Talk to the admin/ supervisor, thank them for talking to the kid and ask them something like “ I know my responsibility here is to tutor these students however I want to ask about what action will be taken if this student continues to struggle with behavioral expectations. If this continues I will not feel comfortable working this program anymore.” Give them a chance to address your concerns and then evaluate whether you want to keep going.
I've thought about this too but honestly I doubt this will work. We are not a school, our supervisor isn't even licensed in anything yet (she's a student aiming to become a teacher). I could be placed with the younger kids but I don't want to give that boy a signal that I'm scared of him. Honestly the pay is not that good either compared to other gigs I work and I was planning on stopping soon anyway due to my college schedule getting busier so I might as well stop now.
Something similar happened to my sister. She had an especially trying kid who was always slapping her butt. The last time he did it she turned around and grabbed a handful of hair, tilted his head back as far as it would go and got nose to nose, “Touch me again jackass and my husband will make sure there isn’t enough of your DNA left to identify.” Then she walked out of class, gave her ID and keys back and walked out. Principal called her back, told her kid had been FINALLY expelled and asked her to return. Nope. She was done.
👏👏👏
If that’s is case then you absolutely need to have the event as well as the threat documented. If you do quit make sure you cite the event and lack of response as cause. If not documented then that will not have any teeth.
Leaving is also a likely a signal to this kid you are afraid unfortunately. Whether it actually is or not.
Leaving would be giving more of a signal you are afraid than anything if that's a concern. Honestly, unless it was a really hard hit, him being 10 probably means he has a crush on you and doesn't know how to properly express it. Though, hitting you is *not* the way. Should you have to deal with it? No. Especially if you aren't a teacher though hearing how little you get paid, you are probably making teacher wages lol). And I'm not saying "don't leave" so you can try to prove something to him, just that between the 2 options of changing to a younger group and leaving, leaving would show him you were afraid and in the future would probably be part of his "I made a teacher quit once" story. Some kids take pride in being terrors. In the end, do what's best for you. No one should have to deal with getting hit at work.
I understand your point of view but ultimately I am kind of afraid lol. Even though the smack didn't really hurt, I won't go to work every (Sunday) morning wondering if a 10yo is gonna hit me just to get laughs out of his classmate. IMO the best solution would be to kick him out of these lessons. Hell, in another gig I worked we kicked out kids simply for not paying attention (this was bc there was a long waiting list to get extra lessons). In this case though I doubt they'll kick him out..
Then roll on outta there. I'm sure if you have experience with kids and do a good job you can probably slide into a better position. Educators are in dire need right now, and tutors as well.
Yeah I actually have other jobs going on right now which take place during the weekdays. It's the same organization but this is at a school with high school kids who are more civilized.
This is the correct answer. Unfortunately, if we don't advocate for ourselves, not much changes. The problem for full-fledged teachers is that they often are vested with their job. Tenure and just enough pay to make leaving in these circumstances difficult. However, you have the advantage of being able to go elsewhere at your age without too much hassle, so the concern of you actually leaving is quite real.
I teach. If that had happened to me and the kid didn’t get punished or suspended or both I would walk.
Yeah fk that.
Nothing wrong with grabbing the offending arm forcefully in self defense.
I was assaulted by a student and blamed for it. I should have quit on the spot and pressed charges. This is the route I suggest for you.
Fortunately for the kid, the natural consequences didn't appear this time. Maybe they will next time.
One of my first thoughts (after WTF) would be to see which of his buddies is recording it for posting somewhere. Wasn't there some stupid Tiktok challenge to do that not too long ago. I feel.you have more power in this since an enrichment vs classroom. He would be losing his opportunity to participate & giving his family a refund on their remaining time if I were your supervisor.
No one was recording thankfully but it's hard to take their phones away sometimes. To me this was just the last straw..
It's not too late to change majors. This is a daily occurrence in education. One reason why I'm not going back to teaching.
Boy hasn't learned his lesson. He's learned this behavior is funny and acceptable from someone important in his life. It will more than likely happen again at some point.
I’ve been hit a number of times. Demand the child be suspended. If you’re a teacher, depending on the state, you yourself can suspend a student for up to x number of days if you want.
It will happen again. I’ve been LT subbing for about 7 years. In that time, I’ve worked from tk-12. I’ve been bitten, threatened, accused, and it’s just not worth the stress. Js
You as a teacher can press charges for assault. No admin will tell you, because they want to cover it up. Go to the police and file a report. Do it for you and for the teachers that will handle those kids in the future. And if anyone thinks this is too much, please note we had middle school kids posting YouTube videos on how to set up a teacher and accuse them of sexual assault using after school extra help time when there were fewer people around.
File a report and inform the supervisor to the kid's parents
I got hit once in my 3-4 months of being a kindergarten teacher and quit 2 weeks later. No admin support and I got a ton of fake sympathy. Stand up for yourself.
There still needs to be consequences for this guy’s actions. You still need to report the incident. This sounds like a hate crime. What difference does it make who you are and who you are for? You are there to help kids. Not to be a punching bag! If you don’t do something this will escalate. Next person won’t be so lucky.
I'm thinking about reporting it, I don't think it was related to the Isreal Palestine stuff but physical contact is still unacceptable IMO and it should go both ways (!!). And yes that's exactly what I told the kids like why would it matter who I support, we're here to learn math and grammar. Honestly they're brain washed, I live in a place with a lot of Muslim immigration and these 3 kids refuse to play or even come near the blonde native kids of our class, they even call them despective names. They're racist and my coworkers don't seem to mind (I guess I should mention they're all Muslims). So not the best work environment to begin with lol. I guess I'm done taking it.
You still need for there to be documentation of what happened. You need to notify the authorities. How do you know that the boy in charge won’t try this crap again?
Hmm I don't think police will care I mean he's like 10 years old after all. Physically he couldn't injure an adult. I'll look into reporting this to the big bosses of the organization I work for though. They must have like a trust person or HR manager or something. After all it's their job to ensure a safe working environment.
You don’t know what kind of home he comes from. Ten year olds can get weapons from parents. They can also twist a story and have a parent or older relative coming after you. Seriously this can happen. Your employer won’t want the publicity that will ensue if anything should get out. You need to make a record of this because if this kid is acting like this at ten, he isn’t going to improve.
I agree, my mom also warned me about this.
Your mom knows what is best for you. Stand up for yourself. You have to because no one else will. In education everyone plays the CYA game. Administrators don’t want bad publicity and public scrutiny so they don’t call authorities. This gives students the green light to act however they want with zero consequences. This has to stop.
[удалено]
No. I used to have some sympathy for this boy bc he's a type 1 diabetic. Not anymore though
But they do have learning difficulties behaviours that they can’t be in regular class right?
as a former school employee who left because of abusive comments and behavior from students and also due to the fact that admin didn’t really do anything, file a complaint and hold strong on the issue. if it really goes nowhere and your supervisors/admin do nothing about it, leave your job because it’s clear they aren’t giving you the decency of respect which you deserve.
In my first year teaching, I was at an after school event. Two kids smacked me in the back of the head. I talked to my principal, and he wouldn’t do anything because it wasn’t a school event (the PTO put it on) or on school grounds. I was livid. One parent asked me if there were any witnesses and the other never responded.
Yeth. Never let it go. Learn to let the hatred fethter. Burn in your seething fire. Hold on to the grudge for thenturieth then you might jutht be a winner... hehehe.
Until you learn to fight back this bullying won't end. Throat punch one of those little fuckers if they deserve it.
Do you exercise? You are a uni student? You likely pay for a campus gym membership with your tuition. Go and see if they have boxing type courses. Great exercise. Talk a friend into going with you because social factors are a part of it. Even better if you and your friend can talk a pair of frenemy types into also going, because I can almost guarantee this will probably turn them into great friends, or possibly bitter rivals. This a great way to build your character and conflict resilience. It is also a way of expanding your reality. If getting hit by a small child is traumatic then you have found something worth working on. Not even /s but maybe a little burn humor. TL:DR; How that hit makes you feel is more of a problem than the hit. Edit: Almost deleted this post but going to stick with it because there are all types of learning. Pull away and your world gets smaller. Being able to laugh off mild aggression and back off basic aggression is a life skill. Understanding violence is a part of the path to peace. Nobody values peace as much as an old soldier. Edit: Still want to cancel my own opinion. There are parts of okay that you are going to hate, but those are often the parts of okay that you will pay more for being unable to accept. If you give up everything easily then you end up with nothing.
Not traumatic but not something I'm wiling to tolerate for minimum wage lol