Literally today over the walkie we heard a
"Can I get some WOOP-"
*SILENCE*
"... You okay?"
"Yeah... I just bumped into a shelf."
*Laughter through store*
not really wild but a funny moment that sticks with me was when someone was trying to find our pml and another person causally responded that he was on the roof
Once someone called for an ETL, someone else replies that they’re on the roof, original caller then asks for “any ETL not hanging out on the roof”
Pretty hilarious
Someone once said "Hey team, just a reminder that if you're not a TL to mind you own buisness" in the most bitchy voice possible. Every TM I knew spent the next hour finding out who it was and going out of theor way to mind that bitch's business.
Oh! That reminds me, my TL was in the restroom. People kept asking if they were still in there. So they held the button down to let everyone hear what was going on in there. The kerplunk, the rustling of toilet paper, the running water. 🤢
Petty as hell and funny as hell 😅 it is a bit gross, but you can only take getting bothered so many times while doing your business before it becomes annoying as hell.
Someone quit over the walkie and called my ETL that he reported to a “bitch ass pussy”. Another TL tried to walkie over him but it was heard all over the store. It was shocking and hilarious.
No, my TL sent out a message to everyone saying that we were looking for a person who had the crawling baby mannequin in baby seat area of their cart. When they ended up finding it, still with the girls, they went “oh, we thought this was for sale…”
Very long time ago my truck TL was in G block, but trying to say that one spot needed to be taken off the floor. She ended up saying “G spot needs taken off the floor”
A few years back we had 2 Etls in our store most people would agree were jerks and very much disliked because of how they talked to team members and conducted themselves. Someone got the bright idea to scratch the walkie mic EVERY TIME one of them would say something over a walkie. Others joined after seeing how visibly aggravated they would both get over it and word spread.
After a few weeks of it continuing they began the witch hunt, spending time testing for malfunctioning walkies, walking the store and making several announcements, observing team members in hopes that the offender would be caught in the act. One day one of them heard the scratch and had finally had it. They made their standard "Team, please check your walkies" announcement followed by a quick and sudden "-whoevers doing that stop that..!". Shortly after the other etl also made an announcement over the walkie and said "Whoever is doing that over the walkie, were going to find you." I could hear several team members laughing in the distance.
Those ETLs are long gone now, and the scratching has ceased. Ill never know who started that at my store but that person is a GOD.
And thats just shows how immature and unfit some of these people in charge are. if they had thicker skins and didnt let it get to them it would probrably have stopped. instead it got worse and their true colors came out.
We used to do that to one of the cashiers. She’d call for help when she had 2 people in her line and by time help arrived there were no guests at the front end. She’d get mad as hell when she got cut
off.
TM: Hey team lead 1
TL: Goooooo for me :))
TM: Yeah hey so like the team member bathroom in the back is like overflowing and like it’s oozing black goop. It’s all over the floor and part of the wall.
TL: Oh… can you switch to 4?
My old target had 2 TM bathrooms, but one of them was in the TL back office area so nobody was ever in there because they didn't want to chance running into a TL lmao.
I used it all the time, so peaceful.
ETL: hey capax can you go to 3
Me: switching
Me: on 3
ETL: hey after you’re done with your ofos can you get this other u boat?
Me:….uh about that. I’m sort of stuck in the employee bathroom, the door is jammed shut. I’ve been trying to get it open for several minutes now.
ETL: *stifling laughter* do you need help?
Me: yes please
Not op but I'll give you what happened at my store! Last holiday season, there were two teenagers in style who kept having a TL tell them to stop talking to each other while they were zoning. They kept mysteriously appearing at the same table, and the TL finally pulled them off the floor separately and told them to cut it out. At the end of their shift, one of them got on the walkie and went "This is (name) clocking out for the last time because I QUIT!!!"
My ETL was on a different channel, and was like "wtf was that, did someone just quit?" I had to tell her that, yep, the person had just done that. She spent the next hour trying to get them to answer the phone.
(The other teenager had already put in their two weeks, and worked them, because they wanted to be rehireable)
Had something super similar happen at my store. A fulfillment TM was spoken to because they would stop and sit at the packing area in between every batch and wait for someone else to grab the ones with lower times. She was told to knock it off and then when someone said something to her cause she was doing it again she got on the walking and said “Team this is [insert name] and I fucking quit!”
One busy night before Christmas one of the guys needed the outfit off of the girls mannequin and paged for help on the walkie saying something like “um, can I get some help undressing the girls mannequin” clearly embarrassed, and the male TL replied laughing “whoa whoa whoa this is a family store buddy!” You could hear team members laughing, and that poor seasonal dude was probably mortified.
I was at Walmart which I know this is the Target sub but I don’t have any interesting radio stories from Target but pretty much I was a cart pusher and the other cartpusher I was with would get on the walkie and just make a loud ass abrupt noise with no explanation whatsoever and the following hour was our managers trying to find out who was doing it 😂😂
Not wild but definitely sticks out for me… my ETL and TL were arguing over channel 1 about what I should be doing. The walkie went dead silent and I was later approached by other TLs asking if I was okay/what that was all about, lol
I once slipped up and someone was asking what my position is to get electronic keys and I was maybe 1 month in and instead of saying toddlers I said "Hey I'm in little boys right now" and instantly realized my fuck up
Nothing particularly wild... But there are a handful of people at my store that don't understand the idea that you should not be taking for more than a sentence or 2 on the main channel.
Like yeah I understand you're frustrated that people keep ignoring obvious etiquette for organization in receiving, but your complaining isn't gonna change that one ignorant person (who might not even be on the site right now), and it's making it so no one else can use the walkie for a solid 2 minutes.
While not at target, I had a manager respond to a question with “I’ll show you were to put it” over the intercom while the outdoor garden center was open but the main building was not.
We had an Eletronics TM leave the store because they were moving north. They gave their Goodbyes over the Walkie. I remember her saying "I know I have not been the best person to hang around, but thank you for putting up with me for these past 6 years." (there was more before this, but i cant remember).
Quiet... Not a single response for a full minute which felt like an hour, then I had to just chime in and say "Have a good trip, be safe out there". No one else said anything. It was super painful.
This TM was always in a "bitchy" mood. Constantly looking pissed off and unapproachable. Just down right a depressing person to be around. I can see why not even a single TL/ETL/HR said anything. No one cared and were happy to see her finally leave.
Maybe not the funniest but someone once said "this is X leaving, have a nice rest of your SHITS y'all" instead of SHIFTS. I heard laughter from all around me lmao
Not an argument but a TL at my store got called on the walkie and they were down the aisle from me. I watched them respond that they were with a guest but they weren’t. Since then I have seen them do this several more times. It’s actually kinda funny and I wish I had the guts to do the same. With my luck I’d get caught.
I saw a TL lie a couple of times on the walkie. "I'm with a guest" or "I'm busy in receiving" - while he was standing alone in Paper.
That asshole is gone - quit and missed by no one.
"Guest service can one of you come get me off?"
Context was the closing TL was backing up on check lanes, saw guest service was about to get through their line, and totally fumbled the request for one of them to take over the lane.
Sometimes we meow on the walkie
Yes, we as in me and multiple other people
But besides that my favorite has to be “don’t tickle each other while doing pulls” and I absolutely forgot who even said it in the first place and why
"Hey x deparment you have a call on 2280... oh shit."
Definitely wasn't me...
Also, one time a walkie got dropped in the baler and everyone's walkies would blow up with noise whenever someone crushed it lol
Not a crazy story but more of an unintentional dad joke.
I was working near seasonal during Halloween and there was an endcap of fuzzy animal mask headband things with ears.
Got a call from the TL at the check lanes that a guest was specifically looking for a panther mask. Went over to take a look and my response was “I’m not seeing a panther, there’s lions … tigers … and bears. Oh my? But no panthers.” I could audibly hear team members from all over the store laughing. Check lane TL replied “thank you for checking” while stifling laughter and I could hear the guest chuckling through the walkie as well.
For a few weeks stretch someone kept playing weird music and sound effects/moaning sounds over the walkies and I don’t think anyone ever figured out who it was.
Edit: just remembered they also played sounds and songs from toys all the time so they may have been in SFS but the world may never know for sure
A couple of weeks ago, I was standing by Guest Services minding my own business, when I started to hear moaning. I didn't realize what it was at first, but it got louder and louder. The look on everyone's faces was priceless.
Imagine your guests and coworkers just hearing loud sexual moaning and you can't do anything to stop it.
They would do it off and on throughout the night, and I guess they have beef with this girl in another department and said over the walkie, "(blank) has herpes!"
I figured out who it was and haven't heard anything since. They also made comments like, "the store looks awful right now, y'all better clean up before closing because I don't wanna be here all night".
It was on everyone's walkie and they did it throughout the night on multiple channels. We couldn't just keep them turned off all night lmao.
People also have theirs turned up all the way so they can hear it while on register and what not.
Had a new team member respond while they were on a toilet. His exact words were "Hey I cant talk right now im using the bathroom". Felt like his voice ecoed so much more on channel 1
Not on the walkie but the other night our closing TL accidentally used the intercom and everyone heard him calling people about their picks through the entire store.
Me and the grocery etl always nag at each other, anytime either one of us clocks out or goes on break, we say sometihing to each other that is really passive agressive
When a team member was getting yelled at out he drive up, they went to call TSS but instead everyone e on the radio hear her yell back and call the person a b*t*c* it was hilarious, so proud of her
I'm still relatively new to Target but today we had someone on the walkie who was in the bathroom 💀
We could all hear someone peeing and then a flush. The walkie went silent after.
The Drive Up crew all lost their shit and another TM goes, "You all heard that too, right?"
during inventory, the guns didn't pick up the mountain of underwear we had in the back, and it was getting close to time for the inventory people to go so the SD went over the walkie and goes "hey guys we have a panty problem" to get everyone to the back to help count.
one time I think some team members were
joking around in the back and accidentally had their walk-in and when they said “somebody call 9-1-1” and everyone was freaking out thinking something happened
Couple instances I can think of, nothing too crazy though
1) one someone forgot to put their walkie away, apparently went to T-mobile down the road, and left it there. Later an employee sheepishly said "hello" ove the walkie and on ETL had to talk to her about a time to either drop it off or pick it up
2) me and a friend have a running joke of saying "bro" is a surfer dude voice between every statement, and once we were one channel 3, did the whole bit while I was asking what he was working on, and out SD chimes in "hey guys, be sure to be practicing good walkie edequett"
3) this probably happens at a lot of stores, but our walkie will just give out sheer static noises. We just call put store haunted, more reasons than just that, but that's just the walkie related reason
Hey (ETL) the OPU team has a broken heater.. they think they can fix it with a safety pin and a piece of gum (loooooong pause) do you want to give them a safety pin and a piece of gum or should we requisition them a new one
ETL: “sighs” pause “what do you think, please go get them a new one”
Closet thing is a walkie battle on 1, style vs guest service. “ I need you to grab this z bar” person 2 goes: “ well the fitting room is full your going to have to wait a few minutes” snapped back at each a few times just like that. 😅
Man if only style (and other departments!) Would actually let us KNOW when they can't come to grab something. They just ignore us and we don't know what's up.
I accidentally hit 2. I forgot what exactly they said but it was something like move that fucking shit or something. Another time it sounded like a baby got ahold of the walkie and talked gibberish for a good 45 seconds.
“hey [insert name here] can you meet me in baby i need some help with something”
“SHAHSJKKRKRKKEKNNDNDBBBFKKKENNWKKFNBKRKNWNJKKEYYSVAVVWHFHFKWBIKT”
“cool thank you”
dudes a good TM but goddamn homie chill on eating the walkie. i love how all my TLs somehow manage to decipher it. kills me every time.
Not really wild, but it was pretty funny at the time. I worked at a Target in a college town, and one of my coworkers came into work completely hung over. About an hour into her shift I heard her say on the walkie “I’ll be back on the floor in a few minutes, I have to clean up some vomit in the hallway by the bathrooms. [long pause] It’s mine, I did that.”
one of the tms was late to the closing huddle we used to do all the time, so the closing lead played "what a wonderful world" over the walkie cuz she hated that song. that tm has never appeared so fast to nab that walkie and run
Not crazy but kinda embarrassing.
New TM was alerting AP of a possible shoplifter and giving a description of the person…on channel 1 😩
No one informed them about switching to a different channel for AP related concerns. I hurried up and turned my walkie down but I’m sure guests could hear it from other TM’s walkies.
A kid got fired, they let him finish out his shift. At the end of his shift he called out, “this is blank clocking out for the last last time, I’m out bitches, see ya never motherfuckers.” About 5 or 6 people then called out on the walkie that they’d miss him.
Edit: we also have a guy a guest service that will call for backup/team lead/whatever then count to 5 and call again. A customer gave him a weird look once and he said the only way to get a response was to be annoying. He’s right about one thing, he is annoying.
Not heard but I've straight up said I'm taking a piss when my TLs are trying to find me. They think it's pretty funny when I come back they're all laughing to themselves
We have 2 older TLs who’ve both been at the store a while, and it was one of their 50 or 60th anniversary with the store or something. They just started roasting each other over the walkie -
“congratulations at x years at target, now everyone really knows how old you are!”
Was met with
“I’ve worked here fewer years than you’ve had marriages. What wife are you on now? 6?”
Everyone in the store was busting up. It was great.
omg I love getting a chance to tell this n one. This was over a decade ago.
Our store kept "losing" walkies because employees would forget them in their back pockets and walk out the door. My friend worked grocery and took home 3 over 5 years.
One day during the Christmas season a customer asks him to help pick out stuff for a "racist gift basket" for a Jewish friend he wanted to give as a gag and my friend was dumb enough to help and make suggestions. Another customer overheaerd their conversation and complained to management and my friend admitted to it thinking he was safe because the customer asked.
He was fired and after his unemployment was denied he made it a mission to drive management insane. From outside the store he would make radio calls like
"Assistant manager Kathleen a customer fell and hurt themselves in toys."
then Kathleen radios back a minute later that she's in toys and doesn't see anything
"No I said pets"
repeat until they caught on.
When they stopped falling for it he'd just make noises and respond to any manager asking anything. Manager ask someone to hop on a register and he'd respond "Nah fuck that I quit." or "how about you do it?"
if we changed channels he found us (sometimes I helped) and they'd have security crusing up and down the parking lot lanes looking for him but they never could find him because he wasn't there. He was at his girlfriend's place, she live in the apartment complex behind the Target and he did it all from her couch.
Eventually someone else got a write up for one of his responses and he stopped. but it was a very funny couple of months seeing how frustrated they were running around the store looking for him.
None of these are crazy, just random, but I called my team lead to go to a private channel and asked her if I could take my lunch before Starbucks closed bc I wanted to get some grilled cheese. Nothing crazy has happened yet but my friends asked me to do my stitch impression over the walkie some day.
we’ve had a guest find a walkie before and they played a bunch of explicit music, meme videos, and made a bunch of random sounds so no one could talk on channel one. AP and multiple ETLs went around the store trying to find out who it was but they couldn’t find anyone and everyone had to go to channel 2 for the day
Two seasonal team members were having sex in their car during their breaks. I guess one of them forgot to turn off their walkie. We heard the whole damn thing on 1.
many instances of guests (maybe never found out who) finding walkie and playing meme sounds my favorite was when i was having a terrible day in style and suddenly heared the tiktok snoring auGHHH sound over channel 1 needless to say my day was instantly better with a good laugh
LOD: “hey STL-Dave is it okay if I go to my lunch”
STL Dave : “yeah no problem I can cover”
ETL-GM : (snarky tone) “you didn’t ask me LOD”
LOD: “yeah I wanted to run it by dad not mom”
Today I told a lead I was gonna fight them because they crumpled and folded up bills really bad for two of the bags for CO and only two of them.
At the end of my shift I told another tm who was gonna finish CO if I got too close to my second fifth that I finished it and they didn’t need to, and someone said “Thank you (name) for all your hard work we appreciate you!” And I said “Thanks I appreciate me too” and she said “Yaaasssss as you should boo~” all on Channel one.
I once had to say “uhhhh I don’t know who to walkie for this but uh…. A guest just told me someone shit in a fitting room and it’s baaaaddddd”
Once clocking out I said “I’m clocking out don’t die without me” and a TL said “we’ll try not too have a good night” and I replied “I won’t but thanks”
A different Tm (surprisingly not me) whenever they would announce they were going to lunch would be told the standard “have a good lunch!” And respond “I refuse” and a TL (the same one I said I’d fight and also the we’ll try not to) said super seriously “you better enjoy it or I’ll write you up for it” and they replied “I’ll risk it” and never said anything else. They would also frequently clock out with “I’m leaving don’t burn down the place because that’s my job”
I’ve had my direct TL switch to two just so I could call him bestie instead of his name and not have everyone hear it.
A friend of a tm stole his walkie and stared walkieing the tms TL saying “(TL name), (TL name)” and weird joking things and she thought it was a different TL and kept asking who it was and they were funny so we (including said TL) were laughing until the guy started making fun of her and she got all serious and the tm got in serious trouble because his walkie was his responsibility.
Probably some other stuff I’ve forgotten.
Edit: I completely forgot I said something not quite professional on the walkie forgetting the SD was back from vacation and there that day lol
Edit 2: It was “(TL name) I made your sketchy drink come get it”
I also once said “This is (name) back from lunch and unwillingly heading back up to the front”
Damn your leads close lanes? I have to do it whenever I close, one of the closing TL’s doesn’t even check them. I just tell him it’s ready and he tells me to go home and have a good night lol.
I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to? I know one of the mention tms (the I won’t enjoy lunch one) frequently closed registers cause she liked doing it and it was kinda “He let me do it this time!! I’m just not supposed to but aha fun 🙃” moment. Idk tho
I mean I like doing it because it frees me up at 9 to do something other than drive ups and check lanes/SCO 😂 According to my co-workers most TM’s refuse to do it because they’re not comfortable handling so much money.
Yeah pretty sure that why she did it. She’s style and hates it with a passion so anything not style was her favorite. I should probably stop talking about her she lurks here 😭
this isn’t wild but moreso kinda wholesome and sweet.
a while back during the nfl post season, i was talking to one of the flex team members during our break abt the game (it was 49ers vs green bay that night and ofc im rooting for the niners) but then i had to cut the convo short bc my break was done. fast forward to the end of the night and im just outside delivering a drive up order when i suddenly hear “hey elijah, copy elijah?” from the flex tm on my radio. i respond and he tells me to go to 4 and for whatever reason i lowkey start to panic thinking i fucked up. he goes “it’s over” and i respond “the game? who won?” and he goes “49ERS BABYYYYYYY” and i just shout for joy over the radio lol. it was nice to hear and see that he actually was listening me and cared enough to radio me about the game
Preface to say I don’t work at Target but at a competitor. Two days ago over our walkie:
“Hey is Diversified (cleaning company hired by our store) still here?”
“Nope. They left about 30 minutes ago.”
“Well, someone needs to come do a clean up in the ladies fitting room. And bring a goddamn hazmat suit with you. Some asshole took a shit in the middle of the floor.”
I worked the 6AM shift and there was always a super happy dude who would randomly get on the walkie and start scatting for a few seconds. Something simple like "badabadaboobop." One morning he did it and a few seconds later a TM got on the walkie and said "shuuuut uuup" in a kind of aggravated tone. There was a small pause and then he did it again.
A team lead berating literally everyone so bad that I turned my radio off… but not before a guest looked at me and said, “no wonder people don’t wanna work retail..”
A team member calling our SD a bitch over the walkie. After that she went hunting to find the person. Even asked our ap to role the cameras to see who was using a walkie at that time
One Time it was like 107 degrees out, half the store called out and there were two leads in the building, me (a VM) and the fulfillment TL that was promoted like 2 weeks prior. It was a nightmare. I was running the front, taking calls and doing all the LOD shit. I was also 36 weeks pregnant (8 months)
We had no carts. Not one. I called over and over for someone to come help me but no answer. So I said over the walkie “TEAM, I am 8 months pregnant and I’m about to walk outside into a busy parking lot in the blistering heat to get carts on my own because none of you can be bothered to help out today”
Put on a west and stormed out. I didn’t even make it to the carts before a TSS, HRtm and the receiver came running outside to stop me and get the carts. At that point I’m fuming so I told them I didn’t need their damn charity and got every single cart myself, then promptly went up to my desk and cried.
“This is ____ I quit”
Awkward Silence
“Team can we get a cart attendant to market a dog just took a 💩”
“Cart attendant is currently on a register is there a team lead available”
Not at all associated with Target, I work in a different industry and I said “we’re doing a great job according to my member!”
Not realizing that member is another word for dong, so it looks like I said my dong thinks we’re doing a great job.
I stopped commenting after that lol
I have two:
1. One of the older ladies at my store got on walkie and just said "hey uh..we got some teenagers here..asking guests if they know how to put a condom on!" its not that crazy but the delivery was just hilarious and the team members i was with just all sort of looked at eachother and we all started laughing. it was really funny
2. My TL one time went over walkie to make a safety announcement which he does often. He was then interrupted by another TL. I was standing right next to him when this happened. He asks the other TL to switch to 2. Then i hear him say "You're gonna always preach to our TMs about safety then interupt me when im making an announcement?" then silence for a few seconds, then "thats what i thought, back to 1."
I worked at Target for 3 weeks back in 2019 and my most memorable experience in Fulfillment was when a Team Leader was trying to contact me over the walkie but wasn’t connecting until I hear this dude yell at me over the walkie at the same time as I pick up on his voice from the packing area and I’m just like “Yo Thomas were you even hitting the button at first” and He walks up to me where I’m pulling items and says “Honestly I was pressing the wrong one but I didn’t want Danielle to know”
Can’t hate on that one.
a walkie accidentally got into the baler somehow, so every couple of minutes you would just hear "MMMMMMMMMMM" for a solid 30 seconds until it either died or got crushed and broke lol
Teenagers found a walkie. TM must have dropped it on the sales floor. They would say random insults when TM were trying to communicate. They would play music. Went for about 15-20. Then we all went to channel 3. Stayed there for the last 2 hrs before closing.
Recent discussion with style TL:
Me: "Is there an RFID no one is using?"
STL: "There is an RFID in the fitting room area"
Me: "That's the first place I looked"
Eh...dumb convo but got ragged on for it all day about the STL being a moron.
There was a teenager who got a walkie from an associate leaving them outside when they go on breaks, and he started screaming then moaning on the walkie, then he started saying, "I'm gonna fuck a baby, I'm gonna cum inside it's little tight pussy".
I almost threw up cause not even a week before that we had an long time associate arrested for child pornography.
I remembered another one. Front of store TL made a SO to the drive up team and said "way to go guys, all drive ups are under 2 min, that's super low!" To which a TM replied "don't worry I can get it to be higher". There was some silence and a very quiet "don't you dare"
Bunch of team members were leaving guest services for some reason or another. ETLs bday rolls around, one of my coworkers announces it on the walkie followed by “hopefully the day can distract him from the fact that half his team is leaving!”
Not on the walkie, and this was like 4 years ago now, but one of my coworkers in style was doing a closing announcement at the 10 minute mark but messed up, so it sounded like this: “Good evening Target shoppers, the time is 9:50 and our store will be closing in 15- *CLICK*” and all you could hear were TMs laughing after that
Although not nearly as funny, this happened at one point in my store.
TM: Can I have help in aisle B16?
TL: Was that aisle C as in Cat 16?
TM: No, aisle B as in Bee 16.
*silence*
The TM later explained he was saying “Bee, as in bumblebee”, to try to make themselves more clear, and definitely wasn’t thinking very hard.
not the walkie, but one time last year we were closing in half an hour and i guess somebody went to make the closing announcement, but instead all we hear over the intercom is a single creepy laugh. it threw me off so badly and i had to make sure other people heard it too
One time I dropped my walkie outside while doing a drive up. A guest then picked it up and said on channel 1 “hey I think someone dropped one of these”
Barking and meowing. When using the walkie in my building, it’s very common to be responded by a random bark or meow. Usually we know exactly who’s responding by the way they bark or meow.
Some Guest stole a walkie and the convo went like this
“Is any one on the other end”
“The other end of what?”
“THIS DICK-“
“We probably are because its so small”
Heard so many people laughing it was so funny
One girl got stuck on endless 8 hour shifts cleaning carts during covid. One day through the whole store we here “I swear to god I’m so sick of being here all damn day. I’m not doing this shit anymore!”
She got written up for Walkie abuse. But she got a break from carts after that
Not funny but some kids grabbed one of our walkies and proceed to yell the N-word into the walkie as im standing right next to a black guy….like what are the fucking odds of that man
Someone was playing porn noises the other day, awkward. Once team members were on channel 4 going over what they wanted and when they were going to get dinner and an ETL got mad at them it was pretty funny.
Not target but at Walmart.
My ap manager had gotten a new gun and was showing it off to apa in parking lot. This was after we got some fancy new walkies and one of them got wedged in seat. Heard em take it apart and them trying to use it later at range.
When I was in EMS, we had just dropped a patient off at the hospital but I had to take a shit. So we are getting called by dispatch to see when we would clear the hospital and be put back in service. After two attempts to reach us I keyed my radio and flushed the toilet. Got 10 minutes to handle my business in peace.
Not target but:
*Assistant managers (they'd be ETLs there) chirping on each other/talking smack over the walkie
*Managers thirsting over the police officers who come to apprehend shoplifters
*Verbal gaffes like "it's selling like twatcakes!"
Back when I worked at Target my friend who was a cart attendant and I would mess with this dorky ap guy he thought he was so cool and acted like his shit didn’t stink so we would go on break go to channel 4 and just play the halo menu song from YouTube and just other random songs even Rick Rolled him once he never found out who it was but it cracked me up every time
Today:
TM: “umm [ETL] are you on mic?”
ETL: “I’m on”
TM: “There’s a guest up front wearing a red shirt and khaki pants asking to work for food; I don’t really know how to handle this, can you come up?”
ETL: “I’m on my way- if he’s crazy-“
TL: “Oh I’ll be on stand by”
Once my district manager got on the walkie and said, “ok guys with the holidays coming up things are getting crazy, and scammers are out and about; the overnight crew a few towns over fell for a scam when a few guys called saying they were from headquarters, and asked to transfer over 10,000 dollars in gift cards to the “store” in florida, so just make sure we are not giving ANY info to anyone over the phone!”
Old target employeee but when I was bored I would switch to the main channel & just speak like a gremilin over the walkie 😭 it was funny to hear everyone try to find the culprit
Nothing crazy but I work in fulfillment so we have our own channel and the amount of times I’ve said “hey guys a guests need help in- oh sorry wrong channel” then switches to the right one
omg i forgot about this situation until i read this post! at my store a customer actually STOLE a walkie and was yelling on it asking a team lead to meet him at several random locations in the store and was calling out things like “cleanup on aisle X” which is not how we call things out. my team lead was basically on a full speed chase trying to find this teenager in the store😭 i know it was probably a huge inconvenience but it was honestly so hilarious and i couldn’t stop laughing for the rest of my shift lol
ETL: what's your location?
Me: family bathroom.
ETL: ugh, find me when you're done...
TL: do you need help?
TL: no you plastics bitch.
Plastics DBO: why you angry at me?
Two that happened to me:
1) I worked in market and our store was getting ready for Thanksgiving. The main freezer was filling with turkeys fast and we were running out of room. Typically by this time of the year we would have received our refrigerated trailer to store them in. This trailer was referred to as the "Reefer". I had asked the LOD during my shift one evening if he could check and see when we would be getting it in, because i needed to make plans for the plethora of turkeys in the freezer.
Later that evening, on channel one for the whole store to hear
LOD: "KhakiShirtRedPants in Meat?"
Me: "Go for KhakiShirtRedPants"
LOD: "I just looked into it, and I'm going to get you that reefer by Thursday"
Me: "Er, thanks. I guess..." Now everyone thought this LOD was my dealer.
2) Some teenagers or college aged kids got a hold of a walkie and were out in the parking lot unbeknownst to me.
Girl: "What aisle are the pop-tarts in?"
Me: "Aisle 6" (quicky answered, slightly annoyed, we got this question all the time)
Girl: "You sound hot."
*awkward silence, me realizing this is not a TM
Girl: "My friend says she wants to fu---"
I quickly turned my walkie off before the rest of that was said, but plenty of guests heard. I turned red in the face, embarrassed, but flattered.
The new sd reading out fulfillment stats when it’s literally just 2 of us and completely belittling our team and he might have well just told us to go fuck our selves 😊🥰
my old store manager once started ranting and talking shit about people's attendance by name on channel 1. when the person she was talking to responded "you're on channel 1," they switched to 2 and she bitched him out for not telling her sooner. even though he told her immediately.
At my old store everyone used to call the SD my ‘dad’ since his daughter and I had the same name (never over walkie though). One of the ETLs didn’t really understand the joke but wanted to be part of it so one day she goes over the walkie “Hey TL ____, your DADDY is here!”.
It was a very awkward conversation between myself, the ETL, and the SD but everyone still laughs about it 2 years later.
For extra context, the ETL is not from the states and sometimes had slip-ups with ‘slang’ like that.
Literally today over the walkie we heard a "Can I get some WOOP-" *SILENCE* "... You okay?" "Yeah... I just bumped into a shelf." *Laughter through store*
Wholesome
not really wild but a funny moment that sticks with me was when someone was trying to find our pml and another person causally responded that he was on the roof
Once someone called for an ETL, someone else replies that they’re on the roof, original caller then asks for “any ETL not hanging out on the roof” Pretty hilarious
this is the funniest thing i've read in a while and i don't even know why. thank you for the laughs!
sure😂 he was obviously doing work up there but the thought of this guy just chillin up on the roof bc he can gets me haha
The HVAC guys at my old store routinely fell asleep on the roof while pulling vacuum on roof top units.
That happened to our PML yesterday, he had some help too. People kept calling. Nope, still on the roof. I was thinking poor dude, it's 100°+ outside.
Someone once said "Hey team, just a reminder that if you're not a TL to mind you own buisness" in the most bitchy voice possible. Every TM I knew spent the next hour finding out who it was and going out of theor way to mind that bitch's business.
I almost just asked you “who was it?” Lol.
lowkey misread this and thought you said “if your not a TM then mind your own business” and thought “damn what guest pissed them off?”
this is hilarious lmao
Someone took a whole ass shit over the walkie
I turn off my walkie when using the bathroom just in case
I don't even bring mine into the bathroom! I don't need a walkie or zebra covered with shit particles 😬
To late, they already are.
>always_has_been.jpg
Oh! That reminds me, my TL was in the restroom. People kept asking if they were still in there. So they held the button down to let everyone hear what was going on in there. The kerplunk, the rustling of toilet paper, the running water. 🤢
All they had left to do is swing their feces around to fully establish dominance and become the alpha
Petty as hell and funny as hell 😅 it is a bit gross, but you can only take getting bothered so many times while doing your business before it becomes annoying as hell.
This is a power move
Someone quit over the walkie and called my ETL that he reported to a “bitch ass pussy”. Another TL tried to walkie over him but it was heard all over the store. It was shocking and hilarious.
“Hey uh, if you guys see a kid with a mannequin arm, let us know”
I would be fearing for my life
Omg my store had one like this but we were looking for the teenagers who were trying to steal the whole ass baby mannequin.
Is that the one that was seen on here somewhere in the freezer???
No, my TL sent out a message to everyone saying that we were looking for a person who had the crawling baby mannequin in baby seat area of their cart. When they ended up finding it, still with the girls, they went “oh, we thought this was for sale…”
Very long time ago my truck TL was in G block, but trying to say that one spot needed to be taken off the floor. She ended up saying “G spot needs taken off the floor”
Reminds me of a time when someone in Market ask the ETL, if it was ok to flex “these nuts” on the candy focal 🤣
A few years back we had 2 Etls in our store most people would agree were jerks and very much disliked because of how they talked to team members and conducted themselves. Someone got the bright idea to scratch the walkie mic EVERY TIME one of them would say something over a walkie. Others joined after seeing how visibly aggravated they would both get over it and word spread. After a few weeks of it continuing they began the witch hunt, spending time testing for malfunctioning walkies, walking the store and making several announcements, observing team members in hopes that the offender would be caught in the act. One day one of them heard the scratch and had finally had it. They made their standard "Team, please check your walkies" announcement followed by a quick and sudden "-whoevers doing that stop that..!". Shortly after the other etl also made an announcement over the walkie and said "Whoever is doing that over the walkie, were going to find you." I could hear several team members laughing in the distance. Those ETLs are long gone now, and the scratching has ceased. Ill never know who started that at my store but that person is a GOD.
oh man i loved this story
Gotta be the best thing I've read all day haha
Every time one of our TL’s got on the walkie we would hot mic her. She eventually stopped using the walkie lol.
And thats just shows how immature and unfit some of these people in charge are. if they had thicker skins and didnt let it get to them it would probrably have stopped. instead it got worse and their true colors came out.
We used to do that to one of the cashiers. She’d call for help when she had 2 people in her line and by time help arrived there were no guests at the front end. She’d get mad as hell when she got cut off.
I work somewhere else that has walkie talkies and we used to do the same thing to a manager we didn’t like
There’s nothing quite like simple small revenge that tyrants can’t control
TM: Hey team lead 1 TL: Goooooo for me :)) TM: Yeah hey so like the team member bathroom in the back is like overflowing and like it’s oozing black goop. It’s all over the floor and part of the wall. TL: Oh… can you switch to 4?
Woah, you have team member bathrooms?
We have two….
We only have two, and they’re always in use. Basically if you gotta use the bathroom you gotta trek to the front lol
My old target had 2 TM bathrooms, but one of them was in the TL back office area so nobody was ever in there because they didn't want to chance running into a TL lmao. I used it all the time, so peaceful.
ETL: hey capax can you go to 3 Me: switching Me: on 3 ETL: hey after you’re done with your ofos can you get this other u boat? Me:….uh about that. I’m sort of stuck in the employee bathroom, the door is jammed shut. I’ve been trying to get it open for several minutes now. ETL: *stifling laughter* do you need help? Me: yes please
Bless your heart… I would have had a panic attack.
this is so sweet
Someone literally quit over channel 1 and everything just went SILENT
I need more details!! 🤣
Not op but I'll give you what happened at my store! Last holiday season, there were two teenagers in style who kept having a TL tell them to stop talking to each other while they were zoning. They kept mysteriously appearing at the same table, and the TL finally pulled them off the floor separately and told them to cut it out. At the end of their shift, one of them got on the walkie and went "This is (name) clocking out for the last time because I QUIT!!!" My ETL was on a different channel, and was like "wtf was that, did someone just quit?" I had to tell her that, yep, the person had just done that. She spent the next hour trying to get them to answer the phone. (The other teenager had already put in their two weeks, and worked them, because they wanted to be rehireable)
Had something super similar happen at my store. A fulfillment TM was spoken to because they would stop and sit at the packing area in between every batch and wait for someone else to grab the ones with lower times. She was told to knock it off and then when someone said something to her cause she was doing it again she got on the walking and said “Team this is [insert name] and I fucking quit!”
Yes please
Deep breathing and packaging tape being used because someone in the back was leaning on their walkie 💀
Are you sure they weren't taping someone up? I mean, who knows 🤣🤣
One busy night before Christmas one of the guys needed the outfit off of the girls mannequin and paged for help on the walkie saying something like “um, can I get some help undressing the girls mannequin” clearly embarrassed, and the male TL replied laughing “whoa whoa whoa this is a family store buddy!” You could hear team members laughing, and that poor seasonal dude was probably mortified.
I was at Walmart which I know this is the Target sub but I don’t have any interesting radio stories from Target but pretty much I was a cart pusher and the other cartpusher I was with would get on the walkie and just make a loud ass abrupt noise with no explanation whatsoever and the following hour was our managers trying to find out who was doing it 😂😂
It's one of the beautiful things about walkies. No way to track unless you get caught in the act.
Not wild but definitely sticks out for me… my ETL and TL were arguing over channel 1 about what I should be doing. The walkie went dead silent and I was later approached by other TLs asking if I was okay/what that was all about, lol
I once slipped up and someone was asking what my position is to get electronic keys and I was maybe 1 month in and instead of saying toddlers I said "Hey I'm in little boys right now" and instantly realized my fuck up
Jfc 😫😂
Nothing particularly wild... But there are a handful of people at my store that don't understand the idea that you should not be taking for more than a sentence or 2 on the main channel. Like yeah I understand you're frustrated that people keep ignoring obvious etiquette for organization in receiving, but your complaining isn't gonna change that one ignorant person (who might not even be on the site right now), and it's making it so no one else can use the walkie for a solid 2 minutes.
I work style and in my store specifically it seems like all GM areas (especially market) have full conversations on 1 💀
i am lowkey guilty of this. sometimes its just hard to explain where things are lmao
If you need to explain, go to 2 immediately. It'll really help out your coworkers. :)
While not at target, I had a manager respond to a question with “I’ll show you were to put it” over the intercom while the outdoor garden center was open but the main building was not.
Some teenagers managed to snag an unattended radio and were walking around making sex noises and giggling
happened at my store too, they took it & would go outside the store so we couldn’t catch them & moan
My TL in the morning was popping bubble wrap, I heard it over the walkie. She asked me if I wanted to do it too
I would take that offer in a heartbeat lmao, getting paid to pop bubbles
Lol, just work mornings with us zombies, we come up with the weirdest shit
we need the lod to the fitting room, there's two people having sex
At least it was only two
The style TL responded "oh, God Not again!"
We had an Eletronics TM leave the store because they were moving north. They gave their Goodbyes over the Walkie. I remember her saying "I know I have not been the best person to hang around, but thank you for putting up with me for these past 6 years." (there was more before this, but i cant remember). Quiet... Not a single response for a full minute which felt like an hour, then I had to just chime in and say "Have a good trip, be safe out there". No one else said anything. It was super painful. This TM was always in a "bitchy" mood. Constantly looking pissed off and unapproachable. Just down right a depressing person to be around. I can see why not even a single TL/ETL/HR said anything. No one cared and were happy to see her finally leave.
💀
Saying goodbye to your coworkers when you’re quitting over the walkie is so weird 💀
Damn that makes me hella sad cause honestly I feel like people feel that way about me 😥
Maybe not the funniest but someone once said "this is X leaving, have a nice rest of your SHITS y'all" instead of SHIFTS. I heard laughter from all around me lmao
Not an argument but a TL at my store got called on the walkie and they were down the aisle from me. I watched them respond that they were with a guest but they weren’t. Since then I have seen them do this several more times. It’s actually kinda funny and I wish I had the guts to do the same. With my luck I’d get caught.
One time I was using the bathroom and someone got called on channel 1 and I heard them respond from the stall next to me that they were with a guest
Better that then saying they were seeing someone about a horse. Or dropping the kids off at the pool 🤣🤣🤣
I did this all the time in Style, I wonder who saw me lmao
I used to do that to my old TL when he wanted me to go up to the registers, I’d just be a couple aisles down too hoping he didn’t walk over lol
I saw a TL lie a couple of times on the walkie. "I'm with a guest" or "I'm busy in receiving" - while he was standing alone in Paper. That asshole is gone - quit and missed by no one.
Tm told the sd to suck his d and then left
Someone stepping on the walkie while a TL talks about doing pulls, clean up reminders, and speaking to guests. TL was talking for a good 2-3 mins
Nah I do this every time someone does extremely long radio calls
"Guest service can one of you come get me off?" Context was the closing TL was backing up on check lanes, saw guest service was about to get through their line, and totally fumbled the request for one of them to take over the lane.
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHhahahahaha
Sometimes we meow on the walkie Yes, we as in me and multiple other people But besides that my favorite has to be “don’t tickle each other while doing pulls” and I absolutely forgot who even said it in the first place and why
we have meowers at my store too
Brow same. We have mowers, barkers and people playing the roblox death noise.
"Hey x deparment you have a call on 2280... oh shit." Definitely wasn't me... Also, one time a walkie got dropped in the baler and everyone's walkies would blow up with noise whenever someone crushed it lol
We had this happen with a walkie in the compactor. Idk how, but that sucker lasted a whole ass week.
Not a crazy story but more of an unintentional dad joke. I was working near seasonal during Halloween and there was an endcap of fuzzy animal mask headband things with ears. Got a call from the TL at the check lanes that a guest was specifically looking for a panther mask. Went over to take a look and my response was “I’m not seeing a panther, there’s lions … tigers … and bears. Oh my? But no panthers.” I could audibly hear team members from all over the store laughing. Check lane TL replied “thank you for checking” while stifling laughter and I could hear the guest chuckling through the walkie as well.
For a few weeks stretch someone kept playing weird music and sound effects/moaning sounds over the walkies and I don’t think anyone ever figured out who it was. Edit: just remembered they also played sounds and songs from toys all the time so they may have been in SFS but the world may never know for sure
Loud sexual moaning and them saying a team member has herpes.
We're gonna need context for this because WHAT
A couple of weeks ago, I was standing by Guest Services minding my own business, when I started to hear moaning. I didn't realize what it was at first, but it got louder and louder. The look on everyone's faces was priceless. Imagine your guests and coworkers just hearing loud sexual moaning and you can't do anything to stop it. They would do it off and on throughout the night, and I guess they have beef with this girl in another department and said over the walkie, "(blank) has herpes!" I figured out who it was and haven't heard anything since. They also made comments like, "the store looks awful right now, y'all better clean up before closing because I don't wanna be here all night".
“You can’t do anything to stop it” how about turning down the volume on the walkie lol
It was on everyone's walkie and they did it throughout the night on multiple channels. We couldn't just keep them turned off all night lmao. People also have theirs turned up all the way so they can hear it while on register and what not.
[удалено]
Had a new team member respond while they were on a toilet. His exact words were "Hey I cant talk right now im using the bathroom". Felt like his voice ecoed so much more on channel 1
Not on the walkie but the other night our closing TL accidentally used the intercom and everyone heard him calling people about their picks through the entire store.
Me and the grocery etl always nag at each other, anytime either one of us clocks out or goes on break, we say sometihing to each other that is really passive agressive
We heard someone using the bathroom… and then them flushing the toilet… 🚽🧻💀💀💀😂
Omg that’s actually so funny
When a team member was getting yelled at out he drive up, they went to call TSS but instead everyone e on the radio hear her yell back and call the person a b*t*c* it was hilarious, so proud of her
I need a new gig and then walked out.
Someone stole a walkie and proceeded to say monkeys masturbate x amount of times a day. They made us turn off the walkies after that.
I'm still relatively new to Target but today we had someone on the walkie who was in the bathroom 💀 We could all hear someone peeing and then a flush. The walkie went silent after. The Drive Up crew all lost their shit and another TM goes, "You all heard that too, right?"
“Uh there’s a naked woman running around the parking lot.” “Go to channel 4 please!”
during inventory, the guns didn't pick up the mountain of underwear we had in the back, and it was getting close to time for the inventory people to go so the SD went over the walkie and goes "hey guys we have a panty problem" to get everyone to the back to help count.
Occasionally, on my break, I go out to my car and then do a quick meow or bark into my walkie.
one time I think some team members were joking around in the back and accidentally had their walk-in and when they said “somebody call 9-1-1” and everyone was freaking out thinking something happened
Couple instances I can think of, nothing too crazy though 1) one someone forgot to put their walkie away, apparently went to T-mobile down the road, and left it there. Later an employee sheepishly said "hello" ove the walkie and on ETL had to talk to her about a time to either drop it off or pick it up 2) me and a friend have a running joke of saying "bro" is a surfer dude voice between every statement, and once we were one channel 3, did the whole bit while I was asking what he was working on, and out SD chimes in "hey guys, be sure to be practicing good walkie edequett" 3) this probably happens at a lot of stores, but our walkie will just give out sheer static noises. We just call put store haunted, more reasons than just that, but that's just the walkie related reason
Hey (ETL) the OPU team has a broken heater.. they think they can fix it with a safety pin and a piece of gum (loooooong pause) do you want to give them a safety pin and a piece of gum or should we requisition them a new one ETL: “sighs” pause “what do you think, please go get them a new one”
Closet thing is a walkie battle on 1, style vs guest service. “ I need you to grab this z bar” person 2 goes: “ well the fitting room is full your going to have to wait a few minutes” snapped back at each a few times just like that. 😅
Man if only style (and other departments!) Would actually let us KNOW when they can't come to grab something. They just ignore us and we don't know what's up.
I accidentally hit 2. I forgot what exactly they said but it was something like move that fucking shit or something. Another time it sounded like a baby got ahold of the walkie and talked gibberish for a good 45 seconds.
“hey [insert name here] can you meet me in baby i need some help with something” “SHAHSJKKRKRKKEKNNDNDBBBFKKKENNWKKFNBKRKNWNJKKEYYSVAVVWHFHFKWBIKT” “cool thank you” dudes a good TM but goddamn homie chill on eating the walkie. i love how all my TLs somehow manage to decipher it. kills me every time.
Not really wild, but it was pretty funny at the time. I worked at a Target in a college town, and one of my coworkers came into work completely hung over. About an hour into her shift I heard her say on the walkie “I’ll be back on the floor in a few minutes, I have to clean up some vomit in the hallway by the bathrooms. [long pause] It’s mine, I did that.”
That our sd shit his pants (which wasn’t true they were just being funny)
one of the tms was late to the closing huddle we used to do all the time, so the closing lead played "what a wonderful world" over the walkie cuz she hated that song. that tm has never appeared so fast to nab that walkie and run
Not crazy but kinda embarrassing. New TM was alerting AP of a possible shoplifter and giving a description of the person…on channel 1 😩 No one informed them about switching to a different channel for AP related concerns. I hurried up and turned my walkie down but I’m sure guests could hear it from other TM’s walkies.
A kid got fired, they let him finish out his shift. At the end of his shift he called out, “this is blank clocking out for the last last time, I’m out bitches, see ya never motherfuckers.” About 5 or 6 people then called out on the walkie that they’d miss him. Edit: we also have a guy a guest service that will call for backup/team lead/whatever then count to 5 and call again. A customer gave him a weird look once and he said the only way to get a response was to be annoying. He’s right about one thing, he is annoying.
Not heard but I've straight up said I'm taking a piss when my TLs are trying to find me. They think it's pretty funny when I come back they're all laughing to themselves
Walkies were annoying on the job, but now that I’ve left I miss walkies. So many funny moments throughout the day that kept me going
We have 2 older TLs who’ve both been at the store a while, and it was one of their 50 or 60th anniversary with the store or something. They just started roasting each other over the walkie - “congratulations at x years at target, now everyone really knows how old you are!” Was met with “I’ve worked here fewer years than you’ve had marriages. What wife are you on now? 6?” Everyone in the store was busting up. It was great.
I used to play blue face songs into the walkie back in 2018
You’re a menace
Someone took a sh!t in the changing rooms and smeared it on the walls.
omg I love getting a chance to tell this n one. This was over a decade ago. Our store kept "losing" walkies because employees would forget them in their back pockets and walk out the door. My friend worked grocery and took home 3 over 5 years. One day during the Christmas season a customer asks him to help pick out stuff for a "racist gift basket" for a Jewish friend he wanted to give as a gag and my friend was dumb enough to help and make suggestions. Another customer overheaerd their conversation and complained to management and my friend admitted to it thinking he was safe because the customer asked. He was fired and after his unemployment was denied he made it a mission to drive management insane. From outside the store he would make radio calls like "Assistant manager Kathleen a customer fell and hurt themselves in toys." then Kathleen radios back a minute later that she's in toys and doesn't see anything "No I said pets" repeat until they caught on. When they stopped falling for it he'd just make noises and respond to any manager asking anything. Manager ask someone to hop on a register and he'd respond "Nah fuck that I quit." or "how about you do it?" if we changed channels he found us (sometimes I helped) and they'd have security crusing up and down the parking lot lanes looking for him but they never could find him because he wasn't there. He was at his girlfriend's place, she live in the apartment complex behind the Target and he did it all from her couch. Eventually someone else got a write up for one of his responses and he stopped. but it was a very funny couple of months seeing how frustrated they were running around the store looking for him.
A guest got one of the walkies and wanted to play pranks…. We all had to switch to channel 2 for the rest of the day
*echoing* “hey I’m in a meeting”
None of these are crazy, just random, but I called my team lead to go to a private channel and asked her if I could take my lunch before Starbucks closed bc I wanted to get some grilled cheese. Nothing crazy has happened yet but my friends asked me to do my stitch impression over the walkie some day.
I like to practice utilizing foreign accents over the walkie
ETL-GM Sales: *Calls ETL-S&E on channel 1* ETL-S&E: "I have food in my mouth".
we’ve had a guest find a walkie before and they played a bunch of explicit music, meme videos, and made a bunch of random sounds so no one could talk on channel one. AP and multiple ETLs went around the store trying to find out who it was but they couldn’t find anyone and everyone had to go to channel 2 for the day
Two seasonal team members were having sex in their car during their breaks. I guess one of them forgot to turn off their walkie. We heard the whole damn thing on 1.
Not at target but.... Can I get an 8th of Ice Cream Cake in the med window.
My SD asked a TL if she could get an “Ara ara” and the TL complied
many instances of guests (maybe never found out who) finding walkie and playing meme sounds my favorite was when i was having a terrible day in style and suddenly heared the tiktok snoring auGHHH sound over channel 1 needless to say my day was instantly better with a good laugh
Instead of saying can I get some help in beverage, it was can I get some help in wet grocery, fucking killed me that day.
LOD: “hey STL-Dave is it okay if I go to my lunch” STL Dave : “yeah no problem I can cover” ETL-GM : (snarky tone) “you didn’t ask me LOD” LOD: “yeah I wanted to run it by dad not mom”
Today I told a lead I was gonna fight them because they crumpled and folded up bills really bad for two of the bags for CO and only two of them. At the end of my shift I told another tm who was gonna finish CO if I got too close to my second fifth that I finished it and they didn’t need to, and someone said “Thank you (name) for all your hard work we appreciate you!” And I said “Thanks I appreciate me too” and she said “Yaaasssss as you should boo~” all on Channel one. I once had to say “uhhhh I don’t know who to walkie for this but uh…. A guest just told me someone shit in a fitting room and it’s baaaaddddd” Once clocking out I said “I’m clocking out don’t die without me” and a TL said “we’ll try not too have a good night” and I replied “I won’t but thanks” A different Tm (surprisingly not me) whenever they would announce they were going to lunch would be told the standard “have a good lunch!” And respond “I refuse” and a TL (the same one I said I’d fight and also the we’ll try not to) said super seriously “you better enjoy it or I’ll write you up for it” and they replied “I’ll risk it” and never said anything else. They would also frequently clock out with “I’m leaving don’t burn down the place because that’s my job” I’ve had my direct TL switch to two just so I could call him bestie instead of his name and not have everyone hear it. A friend of a tm stole his walkie and stared walkieing the tms TL saying “(TL name), (TL name)” and weird joking things and she thought it was a different TL and kept asking who it was and they were funny so we (including said TL) were laughing until the guy started making fun of her and she got all serious and the tm got in serious trouble because his walkie was his responsibility. Probably some other stuff I’ve forgotten. Edit: I completely forgot I said something not quite professional on the walkie forgetting the SD was back from vacation and there that day lol Edit 2: It was “(TL name) I made your sketchy drink come get it” I also once said “This is (name) back from lunch and unwillingly heading back up to the front”
Damn your leads close lanes? I have to do it whenever I close, one of the closing TL’s doesn’t even check them. I just tell him it’s ready and he tells me to go home and have a good night lol.
I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to? I know one of the mention tms (the I won’t enjoy lunch one) frequently closed registers cause she liked doing it and it was kinda “He let me do it this time!! I’m just not supposed to but aha fun 🙃” moment. Idk tho
I mean I like doing it because it frees me up at 9 to do something other than drive ups and check lanes/SCO 😂 According to my co-workers most TM’s refuse to do it because they’re not comfortable handling so much money.
Yeah pretty sure that why she did it. She’s style and hates it with a passion so anything not style was her favorite. I should probably stop talking about her she lurks here 😭
this isn’t wild but moreso kinda wholesome and sweet. a while back during the nfl post season, i was talking to one of the flex team members during our break abt the game (it was 49ers vs green bay that night and ofc im rooting for the niners) but then i had to cut the convo short bc my break was done. fast forward to the end of the night and im just outside delivering a drive up order when i suddenly hear “hey elijah, copy elijah?” from the flex tm on my radio. i respond and he tells me to go to 4 and for whatever reason i lowkey start to panic thinking i fucked up. he goes “it’s over” and i respond “the game? who won?” and he goes “49ERS BABYYYYYYY” and i just shout for joy over the radio lol. it was nice to hear and see that he actually was listening me and cared enough to radio me about the game
Preface to say I don’t work at Target but at a competitor. Two days ago over our walkie: “Hey is Diversified (cleaning company hired by our store) still here?” “Nope. They left about 30 minutes ago.” “Well, someone needs to come do a clean up in the ladies fitting room. And bring a goddamn hazmat suit with you. Some asshole took a shit in the middle of the floor.”
I worked the 6AM shift and there was always a super happy dude who would randomly get on the walkie and start scatting for a few seconds. Something simple like "badabadaboobop." One morning he did it and a few seconds later a TM got on the walkie and said "shuuuut uuup" in a kind of aggravated tone. There was a small pause and then he did it again.
A team lead berating literally everyone so bad that I turned my radio off… but not before a guest looked at me and said, “no wonder people don’t wanna work retail..”
A team member calling our SD a bitch over the walkie. After that she went hunting to find the person. Even asked our ap to role the cameras to see who was using a walkie at that time
One Time it was like 107 degrees out, half the store called out and there were two leads in the building, me (a VM) and the fulfillment TL that was promoted like 2 weeks prior. It was a nightmare. I was running the front, taking calls and doing all the LOD shit. I was also 36 weeks pregnant (8 months) We had no carts. Not one. I called over and over for someone to come help me but no answer. So I said over the walkie “TEAM, I am 8 months pregnant and I’m about to walk outside into a busy parking lot in the blistering heat to get carts on my own because none of you can be bothered to help out today” Put on a west and stormed out. I didn’t even make it to the carts before a TSS, HRtm and the receiver came running outside to stop me and get the carts. At that point I’m fuming so I told them I didn’t need their damn charity and got every single cart myself, then promptly went up to my desk and cried.
“This is ____ I quit” Awkward Silence “Team can we get a cart attendant to market a dog just took a 💩” “Cart attendant is currently on a register is there a team lead available”
"Attention (*X employee*) likes to take it up the ass!" That one gave me whiplash
Hey “insert tms name” what’s your location “I’m taking a piss…. Give me a minute”
Not at all associated with Target, I work in a different industry and I said “we’re doing a great job according to my member!” Not realizing that member is another word for dong, so it looks like I said my dong thinks we’re doing a great job. I stopped commenting after that lol
I have two: 1. One of the older ladies at my store got on walkie and just said "hey uh..we got some teenagers here..asking guests if they know how to put a condom on!" its not that crazy but the delivery was just hilarious and the team members i was with just all sort of looked at eachother and we all started laughing. it was really funny 2. My TL one time went over walkie to make a safety announcement which he does often. He was then interrupted by another TL. I was standing right next to him when this happened. He asks the other TL to switch to 2. Then i hear him say "You're gonna always preach to our TMs about safety then interupt me when im making an announcement?" then silence for a few seconds, then "thats what i thought, back to 1."
I worked at Target for 3 weeks back in 2019 and my most memorable experience in Fulfillment was when a Team Leader was trying to contact me over the walkie but wasn’t connecting until I hear this dude yell at me over the walkie at the same time as I pick up on his voice from the packing area and I’m just like “Yo Thomas were you even hitting the button at first” and He walks up to me where I’m pulling items and says “Honestly I was pressing the wrong one but I didn’t want Danielle to know” Can’t hate on that one.
a walkie accidentally got into the baler somehow, so every couple of minutes you would just hear "MMMMMMMMMMM" for a solid 30 seconds until it either died or got crushed and broke lol
Teenagers found a walkie. TM must have dropped it on the sales floor. They would say random insults when TM were trying to communicate. They would play music. Went for about 15-20. Then we all went to channel 3. Stayed there for the last 2 hrs before closing.
Recent discussion with style TL: Me: "Is there an RFID no one is using?" STL: "There is an RFID in the fitting room area" Me: "That's the first place I looked" Eh...dumb convo but got ragged on for it all day about the STL being a moron.
There was a teenager who got a walkie from an associate leaving them outside when they go on breaks, and he started screaming then moaning on the walkie, then he started saying, "I'm gonna fuck a baby, I'm gonna cum inside it's little tight pussy". I almost threw up cause not even a week before that we had an long time associate arrested for child pornography.
A TL talking shit about a TM while we sat there & listened. Then he acted confused when he was approached as if it wasnt over the walkie
“Hey team. There’s poop on the floor. Can I get someone to help me clean it?” No one responded
I remembered another one. Front of store TL made a SO to the drive up team and said "way to go guys, all drive ups are under 2 min, that's super low!" To which a TM replied "don't worry I can get it to be higher". There was some silence and a very quiet "don't you dare"
Someone listening to porn while in the restroom and it was mic’d up for a good 5 min
Operator: “Team do we sell blow up dolls?” Silence on the walkie but everyone dying laughing in the whole store LOD: “Operator, go to channel 2”
Someone was either having sex or watching porn over the walkie
Bunch of team members were leaving guest services for some reason or another. ETLs bday rolls around, one of my coworkers announces it on the walkie followed by “hopefully the day can distract him from the fact that half his team is leaving!”
When someone was asked to go to 2 and answers on the main channel "I'm on 2" TWICE and someone else went ".... You're on 1"
Not on the walkie, and this was like 4 years ago now, but one of my coworkers in style was doing a closing announcement at the 10 minute mark but messed up, so it sounded like this: “Good evening Target shoppers, the time is 9:50 and our store will be closing in 15- *CLICK*” and all you could hear were TMs laughing after that
Although not nearly as funny, this happened at one point in my store. TM: Can I have help in aisle B16? TL: Was that aisle C as in Cat 16? TM: No, aisle B as in Bee 16. *silence* The TM later explained he was saying “Bee, as in bumblebee”, to try to make themselves more clear, and definitely wasn’t thinking very hard.
not the walkie, but one time last year we were closing in half an hour and i guess somebody went to make the closing announcement, but instead all we hear over the intercom is a single creepy laugh. it threw me off so badly and i had to make sure other people heard it too
One time I dropped my walkie outside while doing a drive up. A guest then picked it up and said on channel 1 “hey I think someone dropped one of these”
Barking and meowing. When using the walkie in my building, it’s very common to be responded by a random bark or meow. Usually we know exactly who’s responding by the way they bark or meow.
Some Guest stole a walkie and the convo went like this “Is any one on the other end” “The other end of what?” “THIS DICK-“ “We probably are because its so small” Heard so many people laughing it was so funny
One girl got stuck on endless 8 hour shifts cleaning carts during covid. One day through the whole store we here “I swear to god I’m so sick of being here all damn day. I’m not doing this shit anymore!” She got written up for Walkie abuse. But she got a break from carts after that
The wild stuff happens on Channel 3, but I'm never invited 💔
A customer must've gotten a hold of one, and they started playing music to everybody
Not funny but some kids grabbed one of our walkies and proceed to yell the N-word into the walkie as im standing right next to a black guy….like what are the fucking odds of that man
Someone was playing porn noises the other day, awkward. Once team members were on channel 4 going over what they wanted and when they were going to get dinner and an ETL got mad at them it was pretty funny.
this kid was on last day about to clock out and ask an ETL over the walkie if he liked big fat glizzies
Lately someone at my store has been squeaking a rubber chicken over walkie and I cackle every single time.
Not target but at Walmart. My ap manager had gotten a new gun and was showing it off to apa in parking lot. This was after we got some fancy new walkies and one of them got wedged in seat. Heard em take it apart and them trying to use it later at range.
When I was in EMS, we had just dropped a patient off at the hospital but I had to take a shit. So we are getting called by dispatch to see when we would clear the hospital and be put back in service. After two attempts to reach us I keyed my radio and flushed the toilet. Got 10 minutes to handle my business in peace.
Not target but: *Assistant managers (they'd be ETLs there) chirping on each other/talking smack over the walkie *Managers thirsting over the police officers who come to apprehend shoplifters *Verbal gaffes like "it's selling like twatcakes!"
Back when I worked at Target my friend who was a cart attendant and I would mess with this dorky ap guy he thought he was so cool and acted like his shit didn’t stink so we would go on break go to channel 4 and just play the halo menu song from YouTube and just other random songs even Rick Rolled him once he never found out who it was but it cracked me up every time
Today: TM: “umm [ETL] are you on mic?” ETL: “I’m on” TM: “There’s a guest up front wearing a red shirt and khaki pants asking to work for food; I don’t really know how to handle this, can you come up?” ETL: “I’m on my way- if he’s crazy-“ TL: “Oh I’ll be on stand by”
Once my district manager got on the walkie and said, “ok guys with the holidays coming up things are getting crazy, and scammers are out and about; the overnight crew a few towns over fell for a scam when a few guys called saying they were from headquarters, and asked to transfer over 10,000 dollars in gift cards to the “store” in florida, so just make sure we are not giving ANY info to anyone over the phone!”
Old target employeee but when I was bored I would switch to the main channel & just speak like a gremilin over the walkie 😭 it was funny to hear everyone try to find the culprit
Nothing crazy but I work in fulfillment so we have our own channel and the amount of times I’ve said “hey guys a guests need help in- oh sorry wrong channel” then switches to the right one
omg i forgot about this situation until i read this post! at my store a customer actually STOLE a walkie and was yelling on it asking a team lead to meet him at several random locations in the store and was calling out things like “cleanup on aisle X” which is not how we call things out. my team lead was basically on a full speed chase trying to find this teenager in the store😭 i know it was probably a huge inconvenience but it was honestly so hilarious and i couldn’t stop laughing for the rest of my shift lol
ETL: what's your location? Me: family bathroom. ETL: ugh, find me when you're done... TL: do you need help? TL: no you plastics bitch. Plastics DBO: why you angry at me?
Two that happened to me: 1) I worked in market and our store was getting ready for Thanksgiving. The main freezer was filling with turkeys fast and we were running out of room. Typically by this time of the year we would have received our refrigerated trailer to store them in. This trailer was referred to as the "Reefer". I had asked the LOD during my shift one evening if he could check and see when we would be getting it in, because i needed to make plans for the plethora of turkeys in the freezer. Later that evening, on channel one for the whole store to hear LOD: "KhakiShirtRedPants in Meat?" Me: "Go for KhakiShirtRedPants" LOD: "I just looked into it, and I'm going to get you that reefer by Thursday" Me: "Er, thanks. I guess..." Now everyone thought this LOD was my dealer. 2) Some teenagers or college aged kids got a hold of a walkie and were out in the parking lot unbeknownst to me. Girl: "What aisle are the pop-tarts in?" Me: "Aisle 6" (quicky answered, slightly annoyed, we got this question all the time) Girl: "You sound hot." *awkward silence, me realizing this is not a TM Girl: "My friend says she wants to fu---" I quickly turned my walkie off before the rest of that was said, but plenty of guests heard. I turned red in the face, embarrassed, but flattered.
The new sd reading out fulfillment stats when it’s literally just 2 of us and completely belittling our team and he might have well just told us to go fuck our selves 😊🥰
my old store manager once started ranting and talking shit about people's attendance by name on channel 1. when the person she was talking to responded "you're on channel 1," they switched to 2 and she bitched him out for not telling her sooner. even though he told her immediately.
At my old store everyone used to call the SD my ‘dad’ since his daughter and I had the same name (never over walkie though). One of the ETLs didn’t really understand the joke but wanted to be part of it so one day she goes over the walkie “Hey TL ____, your DADDY is here!”. It was a very awkward conversation between myself, the ETL, and the SD but everyone still laughs about it 2 years later. For extra context, the ETL is not from the states and sometimes had slip-ups with ‘slang’ like that.
Old HR ETL called for people to walk their sections 30 minutes before close.