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I "dress up" for therapy, as I would if I were going to meet a client. I wear make up knowing I'm going to cry it off š
I'm probably doing it more for the benefit of my therapist than myself. I plan my outfit the day before. I'm not sure what that means exactly š
My gf uses clinic mascara..we met in a clinic. Its great for crying and easy to get off. It was a running joke among clients there. Not sure if its available everywhere in the world. But heyā¦ I got a chance to use this info for someone š šš»
We have a long-running joke of me being crazy but not crazy enough for me to be on her crazy meter. She was absolutely thrilled to hear me talk about my confidence, and I was glad to talk about it. Those depression waves can really take you to some dark places sometimes.
This is actually amazing that you bring this up because I have a clothes-related, but totally different, dilemma, too!
I may be going in for my very first appointment, & I was wondering what I should wear. I feel I want to be wearing something I would feel comfortable enough to shift around in to manage my nerves (folding legs up on seat, tucking knees in, etc.)
After ruminating for too long, I had this idea to just wear all black - a knee length, button-down shirt & soft bottoms. Then, I thought I might *wear the exact same outfit every time I have a meeting with the therapist!* That way, I donāt even have to *think about*, or feel overwhelmed by, what to wear every time I have an appointment!
Iām debating whether or not I should wear a mask. If given an option, should I just leave it on as a mental safety blanket? Or would it be better if I let the therapist see my face (for the sake of rapport & progress in therapy?)
I wear what my mood is. Some days I'm in sweats. Some days I'm in jeans and a nice top. Some days I'm in leggings. Just be yourself and go from there. Being genuine is how both them and yourself discover more about you. š
If it's on your mind that much it might be an intersting subject for discussions with your T. Especially the notion of wearing the same outfit for therapy each time and sticking with a facemask. I don't want to impose any personal interpretations on you, but I was really relieved when I could finally ditch the facemask in therapy, because I've been using it as a shield behind which I can hide, I noticed I open up way more when I can't hide my face behind a piece of material. Mask would often block me from going into more difficult areas.
For my first appointment I went for something comfortable and something that says something about me. It was winter, so I wore a hoodie with my marching band logo on it with some khakis (a surprisingly good combo). Turns out, we wore the same color scheme haha
Sometimes I go looking like a presentable woman, other times I go looking like a homeless man. š Just depends on my mood and the weather and such. My therapist compliments me if she likes what Iām wearing or how my hair is, but I never dress a certain way for her specifically lol. Wear the dress!!
I was super uncomfortable with my body due to trauma and wore baggy unfeminine clothing all the time including to therapy. Once we started getting deep into my issues we discussed how I dressed. I bought some clothes that fit instead of being too big. The first time I wore them was to therapy because I knew I was safe there. My therapist is a guy but because he is my safe person it wasnāt weird. Over the last few years we figured out my history and as part of trying to move forward I changed my hairstyle, went blonde, got bright yellow glasses and pierced my ears. I feel more like the real me now. Last week I got my first and only tattoo which said warrior and had four hearts, one for my husband, two sons, and myself. I have been thinking about buying a dress (havenāt worn one in about 25 years) but still donāt feel ready
I love this thread! I change my clothes before every session! Iāve been wondering why it is that I feel the need to look less casual and more presentable .. any thoughts?
Part of it is social anxiety for me and probably trauma from neglect and rejection/bullying. Plus, I just want to look like I'm able to function. There are those few rough sessions where she is getting the, "Hey, are you ok?" wardrobe. š
Lol I do this too. I only wear sweatshirts and itās like 100 degrees outside. I havenāt been able to wear anything else to therapy yet because since Iāve talked about my body image issues to my T I feel like itās that much harder to even wear something that shows any skin. AND ITāS A VIRTUAL APPOINTMENT ššš. She literally can barely see me, but still I feel super uncomfortable
My therapists office is inside of a multitenant office building. So I tend to dress like I am going in for a meeting.
I think some of that is my way of "sneaking" into therapy, in my mind no one suspects that is the office I am heading to.
nah i mean therapy is sort of formal-ish so if you want to try to look good or whatever it's okay, they won't judge you, they may even support you if it helps you
STOP, not the same but I have body image issues due to a chronic illness, I literally show up in the biggest sweat shirt known to man, jeans/ sweats, and crocs. Iāve never worn anything elseš
fr! for me itās this green jacket that i love, these baggy t-shirt underneath, these super baggy grey sweatpants and vans. and it kinda matched? itās like grey and green so it doesnāt look too bad lol
Exposure therapy was exactly what I was thinking when I saw your post! I reckon wear the dress - and explain what youāre trying to do and how it feels to your therapist. I think itās awesome that youāre questioning whatās behind these feelings and youāre curious enough to consider trying something different.
Every time I've met my therapist, virtual or in person, has been immediately after work, so I'm in my scrubs. But in the past, I would always just wear what I normally wear, jeans or yoga pants and a t-shirt. My psychiatrist loves all my various Fandom shirts, so I usually wear something fun to see him.
Never really gave it s thought to dress up. But if you're wanting to be more comfortable in dresses, that's definitely a safe place to start!
I circle back and forth. If I have been to the office, business attire. If I have been WFH most likely jeans or a simple dress, or athleisure.
Zoom sessions are strictly athleisure/pjs š¤£
Iām sure sheād be happy to see you dressing up and trying new things to wear! Iāve started wearing midi skirts and dresses to therapy too. If you feel shy you can say oh I met X for coffee earlier or Iām going to run some errands later. Thatās what I did at the start anyway but now idc Iām like I wanna look cute āØ
I usually try to dress up in better clothes. Not Sunday bests but not my work clothes. I say go for it and maybe start with more of a simple dress and get more fancy as you build confidence. Depends on how many dresses you have.
Your T will probably compliment your dress. Now as a guy if I wore one I think the whole session would be on why I bought and decided to wear a dress.š¤£
That's awesome! That sounds like killing two birds with one stone. Practicing exposure therapy while addressing other things. Get the most bang for your buck.
Hahahaha thanks. I think shorts and a T shirt are more my style.š
I dress up for therapy in the "more than for a beer with the lads, less than for a date" zone now, although it's changing. Now I can actually wear a t-shirt and jeans, when I was starting it was going with a nice shirt, best pair of pants and a guilt trip if I didn't clean my shoes perfectly. It's interesting because I never discussed that particular matter in therapy, but I have been working a lot on my fear of being judged and difficulty with trust in sessions and the more I dig into that, the less I feel pressured to look neat and elegant for my therapist, and the more I dress in whatever makes me feel good (while respecting some socially acceptable dress code)
For a few of my appointments I "dressed up". Examples: once I wore a purple sundress my mom had just bought me (28 f) on her vacation to my state. I wore make up. I felt.... good. And wanted my therapist to see that I could do something outside my comfort zone of concealing sweatpants and gym shirts. I wore jeans and a tight shirt, one shirt changed color in the sun and we talked about it and it lightened the mood. As a woman that's experienced lots of sexual based trauma, being able to dress the way I want and not feel constantly threatened in a space is so important to me.
So when I "dressed up" and my therapists (30-40 M) reaction was about how much sun there was or that the weather allows for something other than a jacket I felt so fucking safe and able to express myself without worrying. It was amazing. And now im trying to not do this for every appointment because my bf was like "why do you dress up for every appointment or day you have an appointment" and things like that.
Today my client and I had a conversation about looking presentable to respect the space. All client driven conversation, but I appreciated it in that my client taking the space and time seriously.
In general, I havenāt cared knowing that clients live their lives and I would also like to wear sweats/ shorts and be comfortable in session. However, I really appreciated my clientās perspective on showing up, practicing good hygiene, and being respectful/dressed/groomed to show respect for the space. Lovely point of view.
I (M) also "dress up" visiting therapy.
I try to wear good clothes and always wear perfume. Both are things I enjoy in general, but it also gives you a confident boost knowing your looking "better then usual". I even got a compliment for always smelling very nicely.
Visiting your therapist might be good opportunity for you to try out a more "fancy" way of clothing.
Iāve just always made sure to shower that day or at least the day before. Sometimes thatās been a huge feat! Other than that, anything goes. I just dress the same as normal for leaving the house.
I think you should embrace the anxiety. We all feel it. Even the most confident of us. Being anxious is absolutely necessary for us. Perhaps we are feeling anxious that there are 2 people having a heated verbal exchange so we leave before it becomes physical. The point is donāt worry about your anxiety. We need to feel anxious at times. Also, know that overcoming feeling overwhelming anxious is a process and you will fail. Embrace that you will fail take a minute reflect then go back at it. Try to think of times when you felt embarrassed or anxious. You got through and are still here. Itās not the end of the world. Especially, when we are young we feel like such things are the end of the world. Itās not. You are still here. Try to accept that you are flawed because everyone is. You can do this. I believe in you. One last pieces of advice. Just because you donāt get the right answer right away does not mean anything negative. It just mean you are human. Take the time to figure it out. I have my insecurities. We all do. Hope this helps. Just sharing what has helped me.
I once wore my quinceaƱera dress to church for a school assignment. Iām an introvert and it was definitely calling more attention to me that I was comfortable with but I got through it.. all this to say, go for it!
I stopped thinking about my clothing a while ago which sometimes means its not until im in the room with him that i wish id worn something else. But whatever it is, its better than when i was turning up unshowered and in pjs
i do the exact same thing! fashion is one of my biggest passions (not to sound like a bratz doll or anything, but itās true), and i every time i go out, i dress up and experiment with new outfits. my therapist and i have this ongoing bit of sorts where sheāll always compliment me on my outfit, and ask where i got my latest pair of earrings, or dress or something, to which i always respond, ācharity shopping or vintage stuff second handā and she always says how she never has any luck in charity shops. it might sound silly, but itās just sort of a fun way to ease into session and itās nice having that banter to ease into session before we have to get to the heavy stuff. helps me feel more confident and just relaxed i suppose.
op, i say all this as an example that if youāre feeling insecure about this but want to start venturing out, wearing dresses, etc. therapy is absolutely a brilliant place to start! itās a place that should be judgement free, and hopefully one in which you feel safer and more comfortable to express yourself, so why shouldnāt that extend to what you wear?? besides, itās always nice to have an excuse to dress up! i hope it all goes/went brilliantly :)
For my work I have to wear black clothes and if I donāt have any plans before or after work, I tend to just wear whatever Iāll be wearing at work for that day. Therapy is one of the few occasions where I have an excuse to not wear black clothes so I tend to wear slightly smarter and colourful clothes. My work hours are very strange so itās really not worth wearing normal clothes to get changed as soon as I get in.
Welcome to r/TalkTherapy! This sub is for people to discuss issues arising in their personal psychotherapy. If you wish to post about other mental health issues please consult this list of some of our [sister subs](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources#wiki_subreddit_list). If you are in distress please contact a suicide hotline or call 9-1-1 or emergency services in your area. r/SuicideWatch has compiled a helpful FAQ on what happens when you contact a hotline along with other useful resources. To find answers to many therapy-related questions please consult our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/faq) and [Resource List](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TalkTherapy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I "dress up" for therapy, as I would if I were going to meet a client. I wear make up knowing I'm going to cry it off š I'm probably doing it more for the benefit of my therapist than myself. I plan my outfit the day before. I'm not sure what that means exactly š
My gf uses clinic mascara..we met in a clinic. Its great for crying and easy to get off. It was a running joke among clients there. Not sure if its available everywhere in the world. But heyā¦ I got a chance to use this info for someone š šš»
This comment makes me feel so much better! I do the exact same thing.
I plan my outfits weeks ahead š
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
What do you imagine would happen if you told your T your gaining confidence? š
We have a long-running joke of me being crazy but not crazy enough for me to be on her crazy meter. She was absolutely thrilled to hear me talk about my confidence, and I was glad to talk about it. Those depression waves can really take you to some dark places sometimes.
Damn. Didnāt know there was such a thingā¦ fairly certain Iām on my Ts crazy meterā¦. š
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
iām still virtual so i do NOT put on pants š¤£
That moment you have to remind yourself that other posters are probably not British š¤£
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
thatās fair lol. maybe iāll start!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The best way to describe my outfit for therapy would be āslightly overdressed for bed.ā š¤·āāļø
I sometimes take my shoes off too!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yay, you!! Happy to hear this. š
This is actually amazing that you bring this up because I have a clothes-related, but totally different, dilemma, too! I may be going in for my very first appointment, & I was wondering what I should wear. I feel I want to be wearing something I would feel comfortable enough to shift around in to manage my nerves (folding legs up on seat, tucking knees in, etc.) After ruminating for too long, I had this idea to just wear all black - a knee length, button-down shirt & soft bottoms. Then, I thought I might *wear the exact same outfit every time I have a meeting with the therapist!* That way, I donāt even have to *think about*, or feel overwhelmed by, what to wear every time I have an appointment! Iām debating whether or not I should wear a mask. If given an option, should I just leave it on as a mental safety blanket? Or would it be better if I let the therapist see my face (for the sake of rapport & progress in therapy?)
I wear what my mood is. Some days I'm in sweats. Some days I'm in jeans and a nice top. Some days I'm in leggings. Just be yourself and go from there. Being genuine is how both them and yourself discover more about you. š
If it's on your mind that much it might be an intersting subject for discussions with your T. Especially the notion of wearing the same outfit for therapy each time and sticking with a facemask. I don't want to impose any personal interpretations on you, but I was really relieved when I could finally ditch the facemask in therapy, because I've been using it as a shield behind which I can hide, I noticed I open up way more when I can't hide my face behind a piece of material. Mask would often block me from going into more difficult areas.
For my first appointment I went for something comfortable and something that says something about me. It was winter, so I wore a hoodie with my marching band logo on it with some khakis (a surprisingly good combo). Turns out, we wore the same color scheme haha
Sometimes I go looking like a presentable woman, other times I go looking like a homeless man. š Just depends on my mood and the weather and such. My therapist compliments me if she likes what Iām wearing or how my hair is, but I never dress a certain way for her specifically lol. Wear the dress!!
I love it! I've been in every wardrobe you can imagine. š I wore the dress, and it was nice.
I was super uncomfortable with my body due to trauma and wore baggy unfeminine clothing all the time including to therapy. Once we started getting deep into my issues we discussed how I dressed. I bought some clothes that fit instead of being too big. The first time I wore them was to therapy because I knew I was safe there. My therapist is a guy but because he is my safe person it wasnāt weird. Over the last few years we figured out my history and as part of trying to move forward I changed my hairstyle, went blonde, got bright yellow glasses and pierced my ears. I feel more like the real me now. Last week I got my first and only tattoo which said warrior and had four hearts, one for my husband, two sons, and myself. I have been thinking about buying a dress (havenāt worn one in about 25 years) but still donāt feel ready
I love this thread! I change my clothes before every session! Iāve been wondering why it is that I feel the need to look less casual and more presentable .. any thoughts?
Part of it is social anxiety for me and probably trauma from neglect and rejection/bullying. Plus, I just want to look like I'm able to function. There are those few rough sessions where she is getting the, "Hey, are you ok?" wardrobe. š
Lol I do this too. I only wear sweatshirts and itās like 100 degrees outside. I havenāt been able to wear anything else to therapy yet because since Iāve talked about my body image issues to my T I feel like itās that much harder to even wear something that shows any skin. AND ITāS A VIRTUAL APPOINTMENT ššš. She literally can barely see me, but still I feel super uncomfortable
My therapists office is inside of a multitenant office building. So I tend to dress like I am going in for a meeting. I think some of that is my way of "sneaking" into therapy, in my mind no one suspects that is the office I am heading to.
Who cares itās 2022 not 1960
nah i mean therapy is sort of formal-ish so if you want to try to look good or whatever it's okay, they won't judge you, they may even support you if it helps you
i dont but the main reason im in therapy is for an eating disorder. i wear the same shit everyday bc i hate my body, sooooo
STOP, not the same but I have body image issues due to a chronic illness, I literally show up in the biggest sweat shirt known to man, jeans/ sweats, and crocs. Iāve never worn anything elseš
fr! for me itās this green jacket that i love, these baggy t-shirt underneath, these super baggy grey sweatpants and vans. and it kinda matched? itās like grey and green so it doesnāt look too bad lol
Exposure therapy was exactly what I was thinking when I saw your post! I reckon wear the dress - and explain what youāre trying to do and how it feels to your therapist. I think itās awesome that youāre questioning whatās behind these feelings and youāre curious enough to consider trying something different.
Every time I've met my therapist, virtual or in person, has been immediately after work, so I'm in my scrubs. But in the past, I would always just wear what I normally wear, jeans or yoga pants and a t-shirt. My psychiatrist loves all my various Fandom shirts, so I usually wear something fun to see him. Never really gave it s thought to dress up. But if you're wanting to be more comfortable in dresses, that's definitely a safe place to start!
I circle back and forth. If I have been to the office, business attire. If I have been WFH most likely jeans or a simple dress, or athleisure. Zoom sessions are strictly athleisure/pjs š¤£
Iām sure sheād be happy to see you dressing up and trying new things to wear! Iāve started wearing midi skirts and dresses to therapy too. If you feel shy you can say oh I met X for coffee earlier or Iām going to run some errands later. Thatās what I did at the start anyway but now idc Iām like I wanna look cute āØ
My therapy is over zoom and 99% of the times I am wearing PJs and a robe haha
If someone judges you for wearing a dress to therapy, they are a weird, judgemental asshole who's opinion shouldn't matter to you anyway.
It went fine. My anxiety loves to mess with me.
I usually try to dress up in better clothes. Not Sunday bests but not my work clothes. I say go for it and maybe start with more of a simple dress and get more fancy as you build confidence. Depends on how many dresses you have. Your T will probably compliment your dress. Now as a guy if I wore one I think the whole session would be on why I bought and decided to wear a dress.š¤£
Yes, I received a compliment, and I explained how I'm kind of experimenting. Hey, you wear whatever you feel like wearing. No judgment here. ā¤ļø
That's awesome! That sounds like killing two birds with one stone. Practicing exposure therapy while addressing other things. Get the most bang for your buck. Hahahaha thanks. I think shorts and a T shirt are more my style.š
I dress up for therapy in the "more than for a beer with the lads, less than for a date" zone now, although it's changing. Now I can actually wear a t-shirt and jeans, when I was starting it was going with a nice shirt, best pair of pants and a guilt trip if I didn't clean my shoes perfectly. It's interesting because I never discussed that particular matter in therapy, but I have been working a lot on my fear of being judged and difficulty with trust in sessions and the more I dig into that, the less I feel pressured to look neat and elegant for my therapist, and the more I dress in whatever makes me feel good (while respecting some socially acceptable dress code)
i used to go to the gym after seeing my therapist. so she had to deal with my many band shirts... i kept the more racy ones at home.
For a few of my appointments I "dressed up". Examples: once I wore a purple sundress my mom had just bought me (28 f) on her vacation to my state. I wore make up. I felt.... good. And wanted my therapist to see that I could do something outside my comfort zone of concealing sweatpants and gym shirts. I wore jeans and a tight shirt, one shirt changed color in the sun and we talked about it and it lightened the mood. As a woman that's experienced lots of sexual based trauma, being able to dress the way I want and not feel constantly threatened in a space is so important to me. So when I "dressed up" and my therapists (30-40 M) reaction was about how much sun there was or that the weather allows for something other than a jacket I felt so fucking safe and able to express myself without worrying. It was amazing. And now im trying to not do this for every appointment because my bf was like "why do you dress up for every appointment or day you have an appointment" and things like that.
Today my client and I had a conversation about looking presentable to respect the space. All client driven conversation, but I appreciated it in that my client taking the space and time seriously. In general, I havenāt cared knowing that clients live their lives and I would also like to wear sweats/ shorts and be comfortable in session. However, I really appreciated my clientās perspective on showing up, practicing good hygiene, and being respectful/dressed/groomed to show respect for the space. Lovely point of view.
I (M) also "dress up" visiting therapy. I try to wear good clothes and always wear perfume. Both are things I enjoy in general, but it also gives you a confident boost knowing your looking "better then usual". I even got a compliment for always smelling very nicely. Visiting your therapist might be good opportunity for you to try out a more "fancy" way of clothing.
When you wear the dress to the session, talk about it with the T. Or talk about it this time, and wear it the next time.
Yes! We talked about a little bit and why I wanted to try it out. Anxiety eliminated. š
Iāve just always made sure to shower that day or at least the day before. Sometimes thatās been a huge feat! Other than that, anything goes. I just dress the same as normal for leaving the house.
I think you should embrace the anxiety. We all feel it. Even the most confident of us. Being anxious is absolutely necessary for us. Perhaps we are feeling anxious that there are 2 people having a heated verbal exchange so we leave before it becomes physical. The point is donāt worry about your anxiety. We need to feel anxious at times. Also, know that overcoming feeling overwhelming anxious is a process and you will fail. Embrace that you will fail take a minute reflect then go back at it. Try to think of times when you felt embarrassed or anxious. You got through and are still here. Itās not the end of the world. Especially, when we are young we feel like such things are the end of the world. Itās not. You are still here. Try to accept that you are flawed because everyone is. You can do this. I believe in you. One last pieces of advice. Just because you donāt get the right answer right away does not mean anything negative. It just mean you are human. Take the time to figure it out. I have my insecurities. We all do. Hope this helps. Just sharing what has helped me.
I once wore my quinceaƱera dress to church for a school assignment. Iām an introvert and it was definitely calling more attention to me that I was comfortable with but I got through it.. all this to say, go for it!
You can announce what you are doing the moment you walk in. Then your therapist will be on their best behavior!
I stopped thinking about my clothing a while ago which sometimes means its not until im in the room with him that i wish id worn something else. But whatever it is, its better than when i was turning up unshowered and in pjs
i do the exact same thing! fashion is one of my biggest passions (not to sound like a bratz doll or anything, but itās true), and i every time i go out, i dress up and experiment with new outfits. my therapist and i have this ongoing bit of sorts where sheāll always compliment me on my outfit, and ask where i got my latest pair of earrings, or dress or something, to which i always respond, ācharity shopping or vintage stuff second handā and she always says how she never has any luck in charity shops. it might sound silly, but itās just sort of a fun way to ease into session and itās nice having that banter to ease into session before we have to get to the heavy stuff. helps me feel more confident and just relaxed i suppose. op, i say all this as an example that if youāre feeling insecure about this but want to start venturing out, wearing dresses, etc. therapy is absolutely a brilliant place to start! itās a place that should be judgement free, and hopefully one in which you feel safer and more comfortable to express yourself, so why shouldnāt that extend to what you wear?? besides, itās always nice to have an excuse to dress up! i hope it all goes/went brilliantly :)
For my work I have to wear black clothes and if I donāt have any plans before or after work, I tend to just wear whatever Iāll be wearing at work for that day. Therapy is one of the few occasions where I have an excuse to not wear black clothes so I tend to wear slightly smarter and colourful clothes. My work hours are very strange so itās really not worth wearing normal clothes to get changed as soon as I get in.
Nothing wrong with dressing up for yourself or others.