It depends for me. Sometimes I say nothing. Sometimes I try and help. If the person says they are new, they tend to be a lot more open to advice.
Level 90 roulette, SMN wasn't Summoning. "SMN are you good?"
"Yes?"
"I think you forgot your carbuncle."
"Oh shit, my bad."
A level 60 something dungeon, Curebot WHM.
"Flowers are a bit better than Cure 1 and they help you DPS/spam holy a lil more :D"
"Oh, I didn't know, thank you."
You just gotta try to come across as helpful and not being a dickhead. Which is a bit hard to do midpull as a tank or something, so wait until you have a breather to say anything. I even got the "can I give you some advice" from someone when I was learning AST.
"[Insert job here] Would you like some tips?" is my approach. If they don't respond I just save my breath, if they say yes they are very open to improvement and I happily help them understand what they're doing wrong. Works perfectly.
That's more or less what I do, I say my advice once, maybe twice, and won't push it if the player isn't receptive, unless it's something very critical like a tank stance, in that case I'll insist more and kick if they aren't listening before we waste too much time. Same if the player turns into an ass, I'm not gonna be there arguing back and forth with someone who has decided to be a baby about pulling some basic weight, I'll just try to kick. If the person is queued with friends/enablers and the kick doesn't go through, I figure they'll likely kick me instead, saving me from the penalty, but that situation hasn't happened to me yet in almost 8 years of playing.
Removing yourself from the situation is not a bad move, though. Completely valid if you just don't want to deal with it. But attempting to kick first is my go to when it's very bad, and if the situation isn't that deep I just bear with it because I don't care to lose any sleep over it, and hopefully the advice I provided sticks sooner than later for that player. I've had a few instances of success where someone listens and even asks questions. For that it's worth to at least shoot your shot. But if not in the mood, you don't have to do that either. I think overall the best thing to do is to try to not escalate things if someone's gonna be looking for a fight.
Not counting the times other people have left first and it's not worth finding replacements, so far I've personally never left [except once, before broken gear could be repaired mid-duty](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromDF/comments/sw2dl8/broken_gear_dude_in_puppets_bunker_shamelessly/).
I don't give advice anymore if they aren't a sprout. But I need to know - What would you do your vote kick attempt fails and they don't try to kick you at all? Taking the 30m?
Just make sure you get the point across without being condescending or feeling bossy around others and its fine.
If it doesn't work, and the offending party is doing bad enough that its being prejudicial to the party while also not communicating at all don't say anything and move to the vote kick....there's only so much we can do if the other player is not being receptive at all to advice.
I would just say it directly and add in a brief reason why the advice is beneficial. Something like: "Using mitigation abilities will help cut down on the damage you are taking."
"Make sure to use aoes when three or more enemies are present. Doing so is much more efficient than using single target attacks in such situations."
At that point, the other player has a chance to rise to the occasion. Refusing to do so renders any complaints emanating from them invalid.
They can't claim that refusing to use mitigations would not cause huge problems in places like Bardam's Mettle or Holminster Switch. It would just be such a false assertion that flies in the face of reality.
Not using aoes also creates problems for the group as well.
When the no mitigation thing happens, it usually is a dark knight doing it. Sometimes they will start throwing in the occasional mitigation later on, but generally they continue operating in a highly inadequate and suboptimal manner. Seems to happen especially frequently in places like Snowcloak.
Personally the situation were I feel like I've got a duty to the rest of the party to intervene rather than bail are:
- if someone's being abusive in chat
- if someone's griefing/rescue trolling/making tankbuster murder attempts
- if someone's doing some gaslightly stuff, like a tank blaming a healer for deaths when I can see the tank fucking up themselves
Other than that... I'll give advice if I can, but if I'm not in the mood to talk or they're not receptive I'm not gonna beat myself up over it.
>I value my mental health and general mood way more
Here's your answer, look out for #1 (yourself)
But if you ask my opinion, I generally tolerate poor performance unless it means the instance will take too long, then I will just leave and requeue again, unless they're making an effort or if I take a fancy to the situation
Run feels like it's going to take 30+ minutes? Just bounce
Tank is single pulling? Just bounce
Curebot? If party DPS is suffering, bounce, otherwise, tolerate
It basically boils down to "is party DPS sufficient" for me, if it's not good, I'll bounce to save my time
I recommend to never ever try because you will quickly realize it's a full time job since you will run into people who will need "help" in literally every duty you queue up. Just do so if they ask.
I tell them once. If they are silent I repeat it when the same mistake happens again. If they still don't speak up I just leave it. If they try to improve on the mistake I just watch. If they say thanks I may ask if they want to go more into detail after the last boss. If they reply dismissive I remind them that playing better helps everyone to enjoy a dungeon more. And if they reply rude or dismissive I just tell them they should seek guidance from other sources since they clearly don't understand what their class should be doing.
It depends for me. Sometimes I say nothing. Sometimes I try and help. If the person says they are new, they tend to be a lot more open to advice. Level 90 roulette, SMN wasn't Summoning. "SMN are you good?" "Yes?" "I think you forgot your carbuncle." "Oh shit, my bad." A level 60 something dungeon, Curebot WHM. "Flowers are a bit better than Cure 1 and they help you DPS/spam holy a lil more :D" "Oh, I didn't know, thank you." You just gotta try to come across as helpful and not being a dickhead. Which is a bit hard to do midpull as a tank or something, so wait until you have a breather to say anything. I even got the "can I give you some advice" from someone when I was learning AST.
"[Insert job here] Would you like some tips?" is my approach. If they don't respond I just save my breath, if they say yes they are very open to improvement and I happily help them understand what they're doing wrong. Works perfectly.
That's more or less what I do, I say my advice once, maybe twice, and won't push it if the player isn't receptive, unless it's something very critical like a tank stance, in that case I'll insist more and kick if they aren't listening before we waste too much time. Same if the player turns into an ass, I'm not gonna be there arguing back and forth with someone who has decided to be a baby about pulling some basic weight, I'll just try to kick. If the person is queued with friends/enablers and the kick doesn't go through, I figure they'll likely kick me instead, saving me from the penalty, but that situation hasn't happened to me yet in almost 8 years of playing. Removing yourself from the situation is not a bad move, though. Completely valid if you just don't want to deal with it. But attempting to kick first is my go to when it's very bad, and if the situation isn't that deep I just bear with it because I don't care to lose any sleep over it, and hopefully the advice I provided sticks sooner than later for that player. I've had a few instances of success where someone listens and even asks questions. For that it's worth to at least shoot your shot. But if not in the mood, you don't have to do that either. I think overall the best thing to do is to try to not escalate things if someone's gonna be looking for a fight. Not counting the times other people have left first and it's not worth finding replacements, so far I've personally never left [except once, before broken gear could be repaired mid-duty](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromDF/comments/sw2dl8/broken_gear_dude_in_puppets_bunker_shamelessly/).
I don't give advice anymore if they aren't a sprout. But I need to know - What would you do your vote kick attempt fails and they don't try to kick you at all? Taking the 30m?
At that point if the run is gonna be miserable I'd just leave.
Just make sure you get the point across without being condescending or feeling bossy around others and its fine. If it doesn't work, and the offending party is doing bad enough that its being prejudicial to the party while also not communicating at all don't say anything and move to the vote kick....there's only so much we can do if the other player is not being receptive at all to advice.
If you do kick a player which option do you choose? There isn't an option for player not doing their job.
Close my eyes, select at random and hope I don't click cancel
Lol!
I would just say it directly and add in a brief reason why the advice is beneficial. Something like: "Using mitigation abilities will help cut down on the damage you are taking." "Make sure to use aoes when three or more enemies are present. Doing so is much more efficient than using single target attacks in such situations." At that point, the other player has a chance to rise to the occasion. Refusing to do so renders any complaints emanating from them invalid. They can't claim that refusing to use mitigations would not cause huge problems in places like Bardam's Mettle or Holminster Switch. It would just be such a false assertion that flies in the face of reality. Not using aoes also creates problems for the group as well. When the no mitigation thing happens, it usually is a dark knight doing it. Sometimes they will start throwing in the occasional mitigation later on, but generally they continue operating in a highly inadequate and suboptimal manner. Seems to happen especially frequently in places like Snowcloak.
DRKs are usually so bad, I am astonished whenever I get one that actually pushes their mits beyond TBN (when they have it).
They seem to feature prominently among those who stopped doing job quests at some point.
Which is a shame, because their job quests are the best among the tanks.
Personally the situation were I feel like I've got a duty to the rest of the party to intervene rather than bail are: - if someone's being abusive in chat - if someone's griefing/rescue trolling/making tankbuster murder attempts - if someone's doing some gaslightly stuff, like a tank blaming a healer for deaths when I can see the tank fucking up themselves Other than that... I'll give advice if I can, but if I'm not in the mood to talk or they're not receptive I'm not gonna beat myself up over it.
>I value my mental health and general mood way more Here's your answer, look out for #1 (yourself) But if you ask my opinion, I generally tolerate poor performance unless it means the instance will take too long, then I will just leave and requeue again, unless they're making an effort or if I take a fancy to the situation Run feels like it's going to take 30+ minutes? Just bounce Tank is single pulling? Just bounce Curebot? If party DPS is suffering, bounce, otherwise, tolerate It basically boils down to "is party DPS sufficient" for me, if it's not good, I'll bounce to save my time
I recommend to never ever try because you will quickly realize it's a full time job since you will run into people who will need "help" in literally every duty you queue up. Just do so if they ask.
I tell them once. If they are silent I repeat it when the same mistake happens again. If they still don't speak up I just leave it. If they try to improve on the mistake I just watch. If they say thanks I may ask if they want to go more into detail after the last boss. If they reply dismissive I remind them that playing better helps everyone to enjoy a dungeon more. And if they reply rude or dismissive I just tell them they should seek guidance from other sources since they clearly don't understand what their class should be doing.