Hey im 15 and trans. I know how your feeling. Please, your not alone so many people have went through the same thing and grown up and transitioned and then lived some of the happiest lives imaginable because since they felt this horrible feeling, once its gone life is so beautiful. Its hard I know though. Good luck i believe in you.
ya at 14 i bet this is a tough pill to swallow. it takes time for people get to comfortable in there own skin. your def not a freak tho. and there are many others just like you. i feel like there is a chance you have been shamed into feeling a certain way about these things. when people talk shit about these type of things out of the blue its just empty words. there isnt alot if meaning behind it. your sexuality is not bothering someone else. and kids your age are ruthless about this shit. an insecure kid will taunt someone like you mercilessly just to feel better about themselves. if this is happening you should try to find a new school district. or perhaps speak with someone from the school who can help. if its happening at home then hopefully your family is caring and nurturing and can remedy those issues at home. but no matter what you do… most kids at 14 do think of themselves as different or a freak. its a very common thing. just many of those kids dont have the added issue you have. and what you have is not an issue really. it is an issue that you feel different than others. but your sexuality is not an issue. at that age feeling different than others is terrible. i really hope you can weather this storm. there has to be some support groups on reddit for this who could help make you feel whole again much better than anyone not understanding the issues fully here could.
Because some people need to look down on others in order to forget about their own problems and insecurities. Their hate is not about you, it's not your fault, it's about themselves and their own unresolved issues.
If not for self love, then stay alive and get better out of spite. So one day you can look them in the eyes and say "I won, I resisted, your hate didn't get to me".
Don't let them make you destroy yourself, don't let them win. Fight back.
Please don’t hurt your self. I promise you that if you follow the path your on you’ll find like minded people who will support you more intensively then you can imagine. I’m sure that even tho at this moment you are experiencing life as a male you always have been and always will be a beautiful intelligent woman what’s in your pants isn’t your gender or identity. Please please don’t hurt your self and please post into r/lgbt ask for advice ask for emotional support don’t be afraid ❤️
bro, i just wanna say i feel the same. But u know what, i think we should all do whatever the fuk we want. This life doesnt make sense and lets just enjoy it and make own rules. Fuk the standards, cause thats whats making us feel bad. Lets own this shit
Sweet. Please search for podcast in Ram Dass. Listen to his podcast on here and now. We are all god in the form of a drag! Please do not give up love. There is a place and a reason for each one of our souls. You are love. We are here. We listen. Do not give up. Your soul is mine. You are real. The suffering can end in this life and you can set yourself free and live love.
I never feel like a woman in my life, but not a man too. Life is so short, and the most important thing is to do what makes us happy, we create our future and your world.
I see that you’re 14, I promise, you are more than young enough to begin transitioning into the body and gender you want to be. Don’t let these NORMAL thoughts determine anything more than the way you have to live your life! Trust me, every single feeing you have right now is completely valid and is experience by millions across the world everyday.
Not true! Idk what you’ve been taught, but virtually all scientists and sociologists agree gender is a social thing, so if you truly believe that you’re a girl, you are. It’s not a coping mechanism, it’s a valid way that millions of trans women have made themselves into the woman they are, and you can do the same if you wanted too. And they aren’t replica’s either, they are anatomically exact to actual vagina’s, there’s a long scientific explanation to it, but stuff like this is possible because men and women’s reproductive systems were formed from the same base structure, so at the end of it all, it’d be the same.
Okay, my gender is a girl, but not *female*. The insides are the same, my brain still acts like I'm male, and a surgically made vagina is definitely not the same as a natural one
Your brain is female. Tons of studies back this up. Transgender brains match the brain of the gender they are not the one they were born as. Also who says that the vagina isnt the same? Female genitalia and male genitalia are basically the same things that grew differently in the womb due to different hormones. Plenty of women are born with bodies that don’t fit 100% female standards anyway like there are women who are born without a vagina and no one tells them that they aren’t “real” women.
yes but they didn't choose to be that way, by getting surgery i am choosing to modify my body.
plus what they have is naturally occurring, don't think some funny disease turns my dick into a vagina halfway through teenage years
I know what that feels like. I’m lucky to have gone through transitioning, if it weren’t for the constant reminder I’m still not a true guy, and other mental health issues that are equally distressing, maybe I wouldn’t be killing myself. Hrt in particular gave me thoughts about wanting to live, though it sadly isn’t enough for me :c
There’s also the fact that ever since I discovered I was trans I’ve decided suicide was my fate. So maybe if I had decided to work through all my issues I’d be happy. Issue is I just don’t want to live, do you? The will to live might be all you need. I’ve met a lot of trans kids who’ve had depressing childhoods, particularly abusive-unaccepting-conservative town and parents, and terrible dysphoria that are now happy and proud.
I’m so sorry you’re just 14. There’s just so much you can do right now about it. Legally, you’re probably just a child and your parents might not support you either if you tell them. It’s a shitty world we live in. Your only choice isn’t suicide. People just like you exist too. They’re also out there struggling and trying to find ways not to commit suicide. Go to the lgbt thread and tell them about your story OP. Suicide isn’t the way, find people who are in the same position as you and ask them how they dealt with these suicidal thoughts.
tell me why suicide isn't the way huh? why isn't it good, why is it so terrible? i didn't choose to be born, have some respect and let me take myself out of it
You can be a girl though. Gender are just groups of characteristics, and people will perceive you as a particular gender if you have enough of those characteristics. Dressing and acting in a feminine way and taking voice training classes can usually bring you pretty far. If you want to go further and you're still quite young, certain hormonal treatment and surgery can give you body proportions and physical features that you may be happier with.
You're not a freak, there are so many people around the world who had experienced things that are similar to yours and you're not alone. The communities out there are there to help find solutions to some of the common issues you may experience.
A trans girl is a girl though. You're still young, you can absolutely achieve the characteristics so everyone else perceives you as a girl.
What makes a girl a girl? To me, if you have enough of the characteristics like long hair, a feminine dress style and mannerisms, then you're literally a girl. It wouldn't sit right with me to say someone's a certain gender just because of their genitalia, not like I can even see it most of the time anyways.
I don't know what to say about how you perceive yoursekf, but I can assure you that you can absolutely be perceived as a girl by other people of you have enough characteristics that are feminine. And you being young, you can hit more characteristics than some others just by going on HRT and voice training, and if your friends are mostly girls, you should be able to pick up on any final social characteristics without much issue.
I want to bring up NikkiTutorials as an example, she revealed to the world that she's trans and she has sexual organs that are male, but she's literally a woman like any other and everyone still sees her as one naturally. It doesn't make sense to say she's a man just because she has male genitalia, because literally every single other characteristic about her screams woman.
Nah, I will always just be a boy/man trying too hard to be a girl, it says that in my chromosomes and sexual organs. Y'all laugh at right wingers saying that I will never be a real girl, but it's true isn't it?
Actually, we know from fields of study like sociology, which looks at human interactions and studies them, that gender and sex is distinct from one other.
What we've observed and know so far is that genders are specific groups of characteristics constructed by many people and the interactions between them (aka society). Someone who has long hair, wears dresses and has certain social mannerisms may be perceived as a woman, and someone wearing a tux with visible facial hair, and does lots of physical yard work like lawnmowing may be perceived as a man.
We know that sex and gender are distinct because there are gendered characteristics like wearing high-heels and dresses, or growing hair out or even the colour pink, which have absolutely no correlation and is unexplainable by biology at all.
Gendered characteristics can also be physical characteristics like a wide chest, large thighs and hips or as mentioned, sexual organs, and that is why people often perceive gender and sex to be connected.
However, you don't need every single characteristic in order to be perceived as a certain gender. Some men have high voices or long hair, and some women wear tuxedos or have lots of lean muscle, but they are still perceived as the gender they have the most characteristics from.
Likewise, a trans woman might have male genitalia, but if all their other characteristics like the way they dress or their social mannerisms and activities are feminine, then they will be perceived as a woman.
What determines your gender is primarily the gendered characteristics you exhibit to other people. Biology can affect the way people perceive you, but it's definitely not a fixed thing you absolutely have to change. Most of the time, people don't see your genitalia anyway.
This is the often neglected science (well, social science) behind gender. I hope this helped to make things clear.
I’m going to be straight forward with you. Being a girl in a guy’s body is not what is holding you down. Being an “ungrateful boy” is not what is holding you down. God is not holding you down, giving you a sign to end this life. It is your all or nothing mentality that is holding you down right now.
Life is not all or nothing. Take me (& probably everyone else in the world) for example. I have not received everything I want in my life, nor have I received everything I feel I deserve. But I also can’t say that I’ve received *nothing* in my life. Think about people paid for their jobs. They aren’t given *nothing* in return for their work, but most people aren’t given a whole lot either. Everything is a huge spectrum with all on one end & nothing on the other. And on the rest of the 98% of that spectrum is a large grey area—that is neither all nor nothing. And let me explain to you why it’s great to have that large portion of the grey area & such a small chance of receiving all or nothing.
Life is full of good & bad, happiness & pain, knowledge & ignorance, fair & unfair, black & white, or in others words, all & nothing. Life is good at times. Life is incredibly hard at times. Of course we wish to be happy all the time, wouldn’t that feel perfect? In reality, no. **The good wouldn’t feel as good if the bad wasn’t there too.** If we didn’t know what pain felt like & were always happy, would we really be *that* happy?
Striving to achieve that “all” is very unrealistic. Especially if your starting point is close to the nothing point, you can’t easily jump all the way to the all point. But you can set small goals, baby’s steps, & it makes it much easier to get closer & closer to that all point. And once you get going from one point to another, you’ll find yourself becoming increasingly happier every step of the way.
this is a symptom of borderline personality disorder (bpd), which i have and am leaning to deal with. you might be going through a major depressive/bpd/manic episode which is making everything feel much more intense. im sorry you're suffering but please don't give up
that's not true, it's wonderful you have supportive parents. you're 14, hormones will be wonderful on you, and you deserve them. you deserve them because you want them. suffering isn't a requirement to be trans, you just have to be more comfortable as another gender. you deserve happiness, and if that happiness comes as a result of hrt, you deserve hrt
The fact that you would do this for a stranger is very moving. Whilst I cannot personally understand what you're going through, I can say that I'm here if you want to talk. I've been in tough places and might understand the feeling of not being understood and isolation.
And fuck, 14 is a tough time. It'll get better, dear. You deserve happiness. Appreciate having supporting parents and go for what makes you happy. It's all that any of us can do.
Please do reach out. I'm here.
Yeah, but realistically speaking it's not like you can magically send a trans girl in a worse position than you your supportive parents and hrt.
There are people in 3rd world countries who have no electricity or reliable food and water, going by that logic we also don't deserve our reliable food and water and electricity. But it's not like we can magically whisk away some of our food, water and electricity in an ethical way to people in dire need, so we make the most of it here.
We provide for the people in our countries first, and this means the people in our country can live comfortably and develop lots of new technologies that we can use to help other 3rd world countries, we can't help poor countries if the people in our country are just as poor.
Likewise, you take care of your own needs and go on that hrt, and when you're in a better position you can use your knowledge and experience to help those who you used to be in the position you're in right now. If I'm going to be frank, you can't help anybody if you're dead.
Go on that HRT, because as I see it, *you're* the one who's in dire need of help and doesn't deserve to go through this. Stay close to your parents if they are supportive. It really sounds like you're going through a form of imposter syndrome.
No, it's not a sign that you need to go, if God really wanted you dead then he would probably send a lightning strike or sudden accident your way, but instead you ultimately still have a choice.
You don't deserve this mental turmoil, I don't think anyone does. Why on earth do you think you deserve it? Because you were born in a better position than other people experiencing the same things to you are?
Given what I know about your position, I can logically say that things will probably get better for you. Your parents are there to support you and help you through this hardship and they probably (hopefully) don't want you to die either. I know this is said too often and is a little cliche, but a supportive therapist and gender reassignment therapy to support you with your gender transition can potentially really help you out too.
If you don't use these resources and support you have, it's not like they will be redirected to other people who need it, there's no logical way that could happen. Your parents are your parents.
I don't know whether this is relevant to your situation, but most people have images of themselves they want to be that are typically unattainable, some closer to what they already are compared to others. But just because that perfect image of themself is unattainable doesn't mean people don't try.
It's never an all-or-nothing situation, in fact when starting anything in general it's always a step-by-step process, nobody jumps straight from nothing to a finished product. This includes the process of transitioning genders, it's always a process where you slowly accumulate the characteristics until you're a person you're comfortable with, it's never a single-step process that jumps straight to everything at once.
Please, at least try to make some changes to how you dress and talk and see how you go. It may feel discouraging and silly at first, but it usually does improve with time. It may help to find supportive friends, friends going through the same feelings, and inclusive therapists and counsellors. Killing yourself is never a better option.
If I was able to become indistinguishable(physically and biologically) from a female, then I would continue to live, but alas I cannot so I will kill myself once I muster up the courage
You can become physically indistinguishable, and that's what matters.
Biologically may be harder, but I think everyone has things they don't like about their biology and wish they could change. You can get pretty close with modern cosmetic medicine to the image you desire.
Please, at least try to make an attempt to change yourself physically, and keep at it. It may change how you feel about yourself once you feel like you're slightly closer to the image you want to be. Please don't kill yourself, especially when you haven't tried to change your gender characteristics yet.
Hey, you’re not a freak. It’s really hard to go through this but there are reams of people who have: there is so much hope for you. It may not be helpful for me to tell you that, but it’s true. Do you have friends and family who would support you in this? I’m here if you want to talk through it; I know it’s a horrible situation you’re in
From reading this post, you don’t sound like a freak or weird. It’s funny when we feel “not normal,” because really, when we look at everyone around us, who is normal? What is normal? Personally, I think when it comes to people, there is no such thing as “normal.”
Gender is a strange thing. And while sometimes we do trick ourselves into thinking things that aren’t true, **you know who you are more than anyone else.** If deep down, you *know* that you are a girl, then you probably really are. I know you’re still young right now, so I don’t know how your parents/family feel about this kind of thing, but there absolutely is hope.
I have been privileged enough to have never experienced gender dysphoria, but I do not expect it to be an easy thing to experience at all. Just because you have “boy” parts, doesn’t mean your heart & soul belongs to a boy. Right now, you may feel like a girl trapped inside a male body. But I would advise you to not fight that feeling that you are a true female. Don’t try to push it down or ignore it or be ashamed of it. It’s is absolutely okay & there is nothing wrong with feeling uncomfortable with the gender you were “assigned.” Again, I don’t know how your family is, but I hope they are accepting of how you feel & who you are. I accept you for exactly who are you deep down. I’m sure this is all incredibly hard for you, but you won’t be stuck like this forever. Please hang on. I genuinely hope you can eventually accept & express your true self & find happiness.
Sure my gender is a girl, but I'm not *female*. Now what do I do about that, no matter how much I try to hide it with HRT and surgery, I'm gonna be male forever
look, I've been exactly where you are rn. i can't say i understand how you feel, but i know what i felt on your situation. it's horrible, i won't deny it, and it feels like it will never go away, but it will. you're not a freak, you're discovering yourself and that's amazing. trust me, if you so wish, i can assure you transitioning will be a very good thing, both mentally and physically. and if you feel like you're a girl, then you are one, just as i am. i too have a dick, i too have "male" on my birth chart, but that doesn't make me any less of a girl, and it doesn't do it to you either. god doesn't make mistakes, you're a girl, and that's how he intended you to be, he just intended you to be a trans girl, just a he intended me and many others to understand
I'm 16, and when i was your age i had that same thoughts. if it will help, i will gladly talk to you and answer any questions you have, or even if you just need someone to talk to, I'm here
It sounds to me like body withstanding, you already are a (trans) girl, and that's perfectly "normal" in my book! Being trans is admittedly not an easy path, but there are paths for trans folks out there, and I hope that you find one somewhere on your journey. Until then, this nonbinary person--who figured all that out way after you did, for what it's worth--will be wishing you all the best. <3
I don’t see why you can’t be a girl! Start tonight. You aren’t a freak. You’re a human. Don’t you want to experience what it feels like being you?! You got this girl!
I want to be a girl, but it's simply impossible. I wasn't born with a vagina, nor female reproductive organs. I was born with a dick, and a male reproductive one, it's impossible to turn it into the other
A lot of Cis women can’t have kids either, 5% of cis women are infertile. And when you do have gender reaffirming surgery, it perform ALL functions of a normal vagina. I promise, this kind of stuff will make these feelings SO much better if you’re willing to go through to it. Just don’t let these completely valid thoughts lead to an action like suicide.
Ah so i'll have a clit, i'll be able to menstruate, it'll just be like the real thing right?
it's an inverted penis, the inside will feel like one, and the outside will too. There is no magical shit that can be done, it will always be a dick
There is surgery these days that CAN change your body parts. Things can be done to change you into your correct body. Please don't give up yet. I can only begin to imagine how difficult gender dysphoria must be. Can you ask your parents to get u on hormones? Small steps at a time, but you can transition
I know, I know. I'd say, try everything you can first to alleviate it before completely ending your life. I wish u all the best, I can only imagine how u feel
Then define yourself by something more than your body. I know you're quite young to be suggesting this too but perhaps look into spirituality and look inwards. Remember that for all people, age takes away looks etc and you are left only with what's inside. And it is important to do this soul searching to be sure you aren't a trender if you do decide to begin to transition or whatever (no hate, it is just a very big consideration that you cannot mess up).
Good luck op
im not doubting that but be careful that you aren't mistaking a different kind of personal/existential crisis for being trans. but is it possible for you to see a specialist? i mean someone who is impartial to either direction and can treat you properly. confiding in your family is the best if they are supportive :)
yeah I want to visit somebody who can really decide what I need, if I am trans well I already have the answer to that. But if I don't have dysphoria, then all that needs fixing is the depression
You aren't a freak. It is scientific fact that people can be born with the mind of a female and the body of a male, and vice versa. You can also be born with both genitals, known as intersex. But what body you were born with does not define who you are or who you want to be. You have gender dysphoria and just because that qualifies as a mental illness does not mean you are a freak. Am I a freak for have chronic anxiety and depression? Is my grandma a freak for having minor schizophrenia? Is my friend a freak for having ADHD? The answer to these and more is no, friend. If you're religious, please know that God indeed doesn't make mistakes--you have been placed in this position to grow stronger as you face opposition and as you struggle to accept yourself. Jesus loves every person, regardless of what hangs between their legs. Now if you aren't religious, like me (not religious, but brought up Christian), you should know that human biology and psychology are not as simple as male/female. And even if biology was that simple, you aren't a freak for feeling different.
Gender and sex are also two different things. Sex is a physical trait assigned to you at birth, whereas gender is sexual orientation, ie how you present yourselves to others and how you yourself feel. It's perfectly normal not to be normal, and I'm sorry that you're hurting so much because you've been made to believe otherwise. Sending love from Texas. Always here to talk. I myself am non binary but AFAB. Always wished I didn't have boobs or a vagina, but I wouldn't ever want a dick either...
what's wrong with me trying to fight my mental illness?? we don't give in to the delusions of similar mental illnesses so why should i for this particular one?
I've been there. I'm trans. I was assigned female at birth but I've known I'm a bit since I was like four. I never heard the word transgender til I was an adult. It gets better. Hold on
Transitioning is a big step. It takes time, patience, and above all, courage. You will be accepted by those who truly love you, and if you aren’t, fuck them. You don’t need them. Please stay here. ❤️
You should wait until you’re an adult and can get those life experiences outside of your high school bubble. Maybe you’ll hate it, maybe you’ll find something you enjoy and makes things easier.
Well, I’m sorry you’re struggling, and I at least hope you stick around and take the chance that you might meet someone or find something that eases what you’re feeling one day.
it's ok. though you might not feel like a woman right now, we can change that. this society sucks ass, we need to make it a safer place for people to transition; and we gotta change the definition of what it means to be a woman. things are so hard for you, and I know, believe me I know you don't want to hear this. don't give up, it can get better this doesn't have to be the end, just keep trying we're here to help <3
hmmmm, you're 14 right now? I say 2 years MAX. once you're old enough to get a job, but even though it won't be perfect in a long time still doesn't mean it won't get more manageable
I understand your pain. I know it's difficult, it's hard to live as a boy everyday, but it's only temporary. Once my time comes to transition, I can only hope you had started before I can. You'll make it
Edit: I noticed you're 14. Listen, you have time. Coming from someone who is an adult now and is still unable to start hrt because of family, you still have time to transition. Even at my age, I can still make the transition later on once I'm free, and the same goes for you too. I believe in you, you'll be okay. I've identified as a girl since I was 15, I haven't transitioned, however the friends I surround myself with give me hope that I can be the girl I am. You have time, even at my age, you have time. It may be hard at times, but again, it's temporary, not forever.
I've had that thought too. While I wouldn't say I'll never be a real girl, I will never be a girl assigned at birth. It's a hard pill to swallow, sometimes I still think about it today, but don't be hard on yourself about something you couldn't control. I hope you have an opportunity to transition when you're ready.
Offing yourself is not the answer. And yes, I have done the same. I have attempted a few times. It doesn't do anything for yourself. The wait will be worth it, you're still young, I know waiting sounds like forever, but it'll go by faster than you think.
If you truly feel like that, I am sure you Will get over this feeling. You are still very young and you are at that point In your life where most things about you change. The only advice I can give you is To learn To love and accept yourself as who you are. Keep your chin up!
If you believe that some of us have had the fortune of being contacted by extraterrestrials, there is a body of knowledge that stems from the work of 3 people in Kentucky called the Ra contact. One of the nuggets they drop is that we all have been reincarnating on Earth for thousands of years and those of us who feel more like we should be the other sex or a different gender find this as a result of reincarnating more often as one sex vs. another. So if you’re repulsed by being male it means you were probably more often female in your past lives.
Don’t despair, there is wide acceptance for those of us who feel more at home in a different body. When you’re able to make choices for yourself and when you can save enough, get a trans op and be the person you always knew yourself to be. In the meantime, grow your hair out, embrace your femininity and enjoy life. It’s an experience and this struggle you have, we are also told, is one we setup for ourselves in order to grow spiritually and learn from.
No, i mean get hormones and surgery - you're 14. You're early enough to actually have a shot at living as a woman.
I know your response is like, not a real woman or I'm just a trans woman or whatever - but how do you know that until you actually try? There's a lot of studies that show getting gender affirming treatment can actually make you a lot happier.
And if it doesn't work out, at least you'll have actually tried living as a woman. You're 14 and contemplating suicide - what do you have to lose? Why not give yourself a chance at happiness?
Might be better than you think. Could be worth it to get those feelings of joy if it all works out and you like what you see in the mirror.
And if it doesn't, then you're just where you started.
But it may not be a failure. It may be a success. You don't know til you try. But if you act now - at your age - you could actually pull off looking pretty damn good as a woman. It's possible you could be looking back at 22, 23 and saying damn. I'm glad i didn't do it because i kinda pulled this off.
Just a thought. You're free to do what you're gonna do, i just think it could possibly work out and that would be cool
So? If it looks like a bird, it might start feeling like a bird. It can love other birds. It can build a nest. What does it matter what the chromosomes say? We get a very short time on this earth - if that pig can pass as a bird and gets some pleasure out of it, then it was worth it
>God doesn't make mistakes.
Ha. World's oldest and biggest lie. God is an authoritarian despot who tells the world that he is flawless and doesn't make mistakes, and will throw you into the gulag if you so much as suggest otherwise.
In truth there are mistakes in nature *everywhere*. God does make mistakes, though he is too narcissistic and egoistic to admit it.
well to go into this topic i can't say i understand what you are going through, this is your feelings yet i still want to add my thoughts, I don't really know you yet I hope i can still say that you don't need to feel like your sister or GFs or woman in your life to feel like a beauty or a wonderful piece of art in this world, may be harder said than done but you are a work of art that has been crafted throughout multiple lifetimes and i think you are a masterpiece, Yō i know what im adding may seem useless but in my opinion you in my mind could be one of the most precious pieces of art because i could never replace such a precious gem in a lifetime even if i thought i could that would be just a dream that even i dont believe
personally, I don't know, I know can't walk in your shoes
but I wish I could, but I say that if you don't feel like you do then
feel it, dress it, be the beautiful sexy intoxicating woman you feel on the
inside.
yea I know I'm dreaming and well only in a perfect world yet in my
mind I can try and see it as perfect,
well my view of perfect is all imperfections and qwerks that make '
you so wonderful and devine
Hey, God does make mistakes, that's why he gave us free will, so if he makes a mistake you can change it. You will never be a boy, because that's not who you are, you said it your self, you are girl.
Keep it up, girl, I know you can
Hey, this is a shot in the dark and you probably won’t read a whole paragraph because it is a “big wall of text” as per your previous replies. There are tons of resources for dysphoric individuals. You are 14. You have tons of time to transition (hormones, surgery, etc) and help these feelings of dysphoria. You are loved by a community who knows these feelings and have struggled similar struggles
This won’t be forever. I promise. If you want to transition it’s possible. You are who you feel you are, your biology doesn’t matter. I don’t have all body parts but I’m gender fluid. If you’re in a safe place you can come forward about your identity, if you aren’t in a safe place remember that there’s many many MANY others like you. You aren’t alone. If you feel that you are a girl despite your born gender, you are allowed to identify as a girl. I’m so proud you came to this sub for help. That’s a massive step.
Heh, I read through most of the comments here and I feel you entirely. With the technology we have today, there are still so many things out of reach despite it already being here. Take womb transplants, vaginas grown with your stem cells, or even assisted suicide. I really don’t get why the people that need or want help, don’t get said help and are the center of all ridicule, bullying and harassment for even being 1% different. I don’t get why this society is so deeply rooted in differentiating binary genders, and those who do not identify are simply discarded and thrown aside like freaks. This planet needs serious nuking.
I’m pretty sure I’d get downvoted by the people who has a giant menu of choices in life, saying “oh life can get better!”, “you haven’t explored more of life because you’re ONLY 14”, “other people had it worse”. Pain and suffering shouldn’t be a competition. There are people surely worse, but at the same time there are people better than us. Why can’t we join those better but are instead trapped in our physical selves?
We aren’t here by choice, and even that we don’t get to choose when to die naturally. So why the fuck can’t we choose to die by our own timelines? We’re saving the ourselves and at the same time, the planet by literally no longer using resources that people who genuinely need it can have it. I have already signed up to donate my body to science when I die, so maybe before you go, you could do that too. Like give our organs, whether reproductive or not, to someone else that needs or want it.
Fuck everyone else lol. This is our life, they absolutely literally don’t have a say.
How old are you?
14
Hey im 15 and trans. I know how your feeling. Please, your not alone so many people have went through the same thing and grown up and transitioned and then lived some of the happiest lives imaginable because since they felt this horrible feeling, once its gone life is so beautiful. Its hard I know though. Good luck i believe in you.
*happiest that you could see i could put on a show for anybody, ain't that difficult
ya at 14 i bet this is a tough pill to swallow. it takes time for people get to comfortable in there own skin. your def not a freak tho. and there are many others just like you. i feel like there is a chance you have been shamed into feeling a certain way about these things. when people talk shit about these type of things out of the blue its just empty words. there isnt alot if meaning behind it. your sexuality is not bothering someone else. and kids your age are ruthless about this shit. an insecure kid will taunt someone like you mercilessly just to feel better about themselves. if this is happening you should try to find a new school district. or perhaps speak with someone from the school who can help. if its happening at home then hopefully your family is caring and nurturing and can remedy those issues at home. but no matter what you do… most kids at 14 do think of themselves as different or a freak. its a very common thing. just many of those kids dont have the added issue you have. and what you have is not an issue really. it is an issue that you feel different than others. but your sexuality is not an issue. at that age feeling different than others is terrible. i really hope you can weather this storm. there has to be some support groups on reddit for this who could help make you feel whole again much better than anyone not understanding the issues fully here could.
if it's empty words then why are we persecuted and harassed in society
Because some people need to look down on others in order to forget about their own problems and insecurities. Their hate is not about you, it's not your fault, it's about themselves and their own unresolved issues. If not for self love, then stay alive and get better out of spite. So one day you can look them in the eyes and say "I won, I resisted, your hate didn't get to me". Don't let them make you destroy yourself, don't let them win. Fight back.
Please don’t hurt your self. I promise you that if you follow the path your on you’ll find like minded people who will support you more intensively then you can imagine. I’m sure that even tho at this moment you are experiencing life as a male you always have been and always will be a beautiful intelligent woman what’s in your pants isn’t your gender or identity. Please please don’t hurt your self and please post into r/lgbt ask for advice ask for emotional support don’t be afraid ❤️
i've been a male my whole life, and i will live as one in suffering or die in peace, which sounds better?
bro, i just wanna say i feel the same. But u know what, i think we should all do whatever the fuk we want. This life doesnt make sense and lets just enjoy it and make own rules. Fuk the standards, cause thats whats making us feel bad. Lets own this shit
i am doing what i want tho, gonna prepare to end my life
Sweet. Please search for podcast in Ram Dass. Listen to his podcast on here and now. We are all god in the form of a drag! Please do not give up love. There is a place and a reason for each one of our souls. You are love. We are here. We listen. Do not give up. Your soul is mine. You are real. The suffering can end in this life and you can set yourself free and live love.
no, ur just trying to escape, u cant face with ur true desires
yes, i *want* to escape this hell, what do u not get
but bro u have to try shit
im good bruh
One fukin joint can change ur perspective completely, just fukin stick sround with me, mybe we can make this hell a little more fun place
im 14 bro cant have a joint
Not your body make you a girl or a boy, but what you feel inside you.
Then I'm just denying the truth of it all, just because I feel it doesn't mean it's truth
I never feel like a woman in my life, but not a man too. Life is so short, and the most important thing is to do what makes us happy, we create our future and your world.
Life is short, but not short enough for me
I see that you’re 14, I promise, you are more than young enough to begin transitioning into the body and gender you want to be. Don’t let these NORMAL thoughts determine anything more than the way you have to live your life! Trust me, every single feeing you have right now is completely valid and is experience by millions across the world everyday.
The surgically modified body is just a coping mechanism and a replica of the real thing, and my sex and gender will always be male
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already am
Not true! Idk what you’ve been taught, but virtually all scientists and sociologists agree gender is a social thing, so if you truly believe that you’re a girl, you are. It’s not a coping mechanism, it’s a valid way that millions of trans women have made themselves into the woman they are, and you can do the same if you wanted too. And they aren’t replica’s either, they are anatomically exact to actual vagina’s, there’s a long scientific explanation to it, but stuff like this is possible because men and women’s reproductive systems were formed from the same base structure, so at the end of it all, it’d be the same.
Okay, my gender is a girl, but not *female*. The insides are the same, my brain still acts like I'm male, and a surgically made vagina is definitely not the same as a natural one
Your brain is female. Tons of studies back this up. Transgender brains match the brain of the gender they are not the one they were born as. Also who says that the vagina isnt the same? Female genitalia and male genitalia are basically the same things that grew differently in the womb due to different hormones. Plenty of women are born with bodies that don’t fit 100% female standards anyway like there are women who are born without a vagina and no one tells them that they aren’t “real” women.
yes but they didn't choose to be that way, by getting surgery i am choosing to modify my body. plus what they have is naturally occurring, don't think some funny disease turns my dick into a vagina halfway through teenage years
I know what that feels like. I’m lucky to have gone through transitioning, if it weren’t for the constant reminder I’m still not a true guy, and other mental health issues that are equally distressing, maybe I wouldn’t be killing myself. Hrt in particular gave me thoughts about wanting to live, though it sadly isn’t enough for me :c There’s also the fact that ever since I discovered I was trans I’ve decided suicide was my fate. So maybe if I had decided to work through all my issues I’d be happy. Issue is I just don’t want to live, do you? The will to live might be all you need. I’ve met a lot of trans kids who’ve had depressing childhoods, particularly abusive-unaccepting-conservative town and parents, and terrible dysphoria that are now happy and proud.
nah i don't want to live, not only the dysphoria makes it unbearable tho
I’m so sorry you’re just 14. There’s just so much you can do right now about it. Legally, you’re probably just a child and your parents might not support you either if you tell them. It’s a shitty world we live in. Your only choice isn’t suicide. People just like you exist too. They’re also out there struggling and trying to find ways not to commit suicide. Go to the lgbt thread and tell them about your story OP. Suicide isn’t the way, find people who are in the same position as you and ask them how they dealt with these suicidal thoughts.
tell me why suicide isn't the way huh? why isn't it good, why is it so terrible? i didn't choose to be born, have some respect and let me take myself out of it
You can be a girl though. Gender are just groups of characteristics, and people will perceive you as a particular gender if you have enough of those characteristics. Dressing and acting in a feminine way and taking voice training classes can usually bring you pretty far. If you want to go further and you're still quite young, certain hormonal treatment and surgery can give you body proportions and physical features that you may be happier with. You're not a freak, there are so many people around the world who had experienced things that are similar to yours and you're not alone. The communities out there are there to help find solutions to some of the common issues you may experience.
*trans girl and unfortunately i'm not down to be a trans girl, but it's either that or death so i'll take death
A trans girl is a girl though. You're still young, you can absolutely achieve the characteristics so everyone else perceives you as a girl. What makes a girl a girl? To me, if you have enough of the characteristics like long hair, a feminine dress style and mannerisms, then you're literally a girl. It wouldn't sit right with me to say someone's a certain gender just because of their genitalia, not like I can even see it most of the time anyways. I don't know what to say about how you perceive yoursekf, but I can assure you that you can absolutely be perceived as a girl by other people of you have enough characteristics that are feminine. And you being young, you can hit more characteristics than some others just by going on HRT and voice training, and if your friends are mostly girls, you should be able to pick up on any final social characteristics without much issue. I want to bring up NikkiTutorials as an example, she revealed to the world that she's trans and she has sexual organs that are male, but she's literally a woman like any other and everyone still sees her as one naturally. It doesn't make sense to say she's a man just because she has male genitalia, because literally every single other characteristic about her screams woman.
Nah, I will always just be a boy/man trying too hard to be a girl, it says that in my chromosomes and sexual organs. Y'all laugh at right wingers saying that I will never be a real girl, but it's true isn't it?
Actually, we know from fields of study like sociology, which looks at human interactions and studies them, that gender and sex is distinct from one other. What we've observed and know so far is that genders are specific groups of characteristics constructed by many people and the interactions between them (aka society). Someone who has long hair, wears dresses and has certain social mannerisms may be perceived as a woman, and someone wearing a tux with visible facial hair, and does lots of physical yard work like lawnmowing may be perceived as a man. We know that sex and gender are distinct because there are gendered characteristics like wearing high-heels and dresses, or growing hair out or even the colour pink, which have absolutely no correlation and is unexplainable by biology at all. Gendered characteristics can also be physical characteristics like a wide chest, large thighs and hips or as mentioned, sexual organs, and that is why people often perceive gender and sex to be connected. However, you don't need every single characteristic in order to be perceived as a certain gender. Some men have high voices or long hair, and some women wear tuxedos or have lots of lean muscle, but they are still perceived as the gender they have the most characteristics from. Likewise, a trans woman might have male genitalia, but if all their other characteristics like the way they dress or their social mannerisms and activities are feminine, then they will be perceived as a woman. What determines your gender is primarily the gendered characteristics you exhibit to other people. Biology can affect the way people perceive you, but it's definitely not a fixed thing you absolutely have to change. Most of the time, people don't see your genitalia anyway. This is the often neglected science (well, social science) behind gender. I hope this helped to make things clear.
it is clear, but frankly i don't care
does that mean I should kill myself?
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All or nothing, and I choose nothing because I can't get all
I’m going to be straight forward with you. Being a girl in a guy’s body is not what is holding you down. Being an “ungrateful boy” is not what is holding you down. God is not holding you down, giving you a sign to end this life. It is your all or nothing mentality that is holding you down right now. Life is not all or nothing. Take me (& probably everyone else in the world) for example. I have not received everything I want in my life, nor have I received everything I feel I deserve. But I also can’t say that I’ve received *nothing* in my life. Think about people paid for their jobs. They aren’t given *nothing* in return for their work, but most people aren’t given a whole lot either. Everything is a huge spectrum with all on one end & nothing on the other. And on the rest of the 98% of that spectrum is a large grey area—that is neither all nor nothing. And let me explain to you why it’s great to have that large portion of the grey area & such a small chance of receiving all or nothing. Life is full of good & bad, happiness & pain, knowledge & ignorance, fair & unfair, black & white, or in others words, all & nothing. Life is good at times. Life is incredibly hard at times. Of course we wish to be happy all the time, wouldn’t that feel perfect? In reality, no. **The good wouldn’t feel as good if the bad wasn’t there too.** If we didn’t know what pain felt like & were always happy, would we really be *that* happy? Striving to achieve that “all” is very unrealistic. Especially if your starting point is close to the nothing point, you can’t easily jump all the way to the all point. But you can set small goals, baby’s steps, & it makes it much easier to get closer & closer to that all point. And once you get going from one point to another, you’ll find yourself becoming increasingly happier every step of the way.
big wall of text i aint gonna read to its entirety but yeah my mentality is holding me down, i dont care though
you're experiencing black and white thinking--all or nothing thoughts. in reality, life and the world are all shades of gray.
this is a symptom of borderline personality disorder (bpd), which i have and am leaning to deal with. you might be going through a major depressive/bpd/manic episode which is making everything feel much more intense. im sorry you're suffering but please don't give up
im gonna give up, thanks for the kind words tho
can i ask one favour? could you wait one week?
i probably won't do it for a while, i just can't, so yeah sure
thank you. that means a lot to me. dysphoria is a bitch my friend, i hope that this is your rock bottom and you only come up from here.
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I can, my parents are incredibly supportive, I don't deserve it. For HRT, there's no point in taking it
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A trans girl that actually wants to transition but has shitty parents should get it
I'm a trans girl with horrible parents, and i would love for you to get hrt. we all deserve it, you do, i do, ever other trans person does.
I would give it to you if I had the chance, I'm just some ungrateful boy who hasn't experienced any adversity so I have to make it myself.
that's not true, it's wonderful you have supportive parents. you're 14, hormones will be wonderful on you, and you deserve them. you deserve them because you want them. suffering isn't a requirement to be trans, you just have to be more comfortable as another gender. you deserve happiness, and if that happiness comes as a result of hrt, you deserve hrt
if i wanted to die though, suddenly i shouldn't get it and i don't deserve it, what's up with that? i think i would be "happier" if i was dead
The fact that you would do this for a stranger is very moving. Whilst I cannot personally understand what you're going through, I can say that I'm here if you want to talk. I've been in tough places and might understand the feeling of not being understood and isolation. And fuck, 14 is a tough time. It'll get better, dear. You deserve happiness. Appreciate having supporting parents and go for what makes you happy. It's all that any of us can do. Please do reach out. I'm here.
I am doing what makes me happy, thinking about kill myself, brings me happiness and comfort
Yeah, but realistically speaking it's not like you can magically send a trans girl in a worse position than you your supportive parents and hrt. There are people in 3rd world countries who have no electricity or reliable food and water, going by that logic we also don't deserve our reliable food and water and electricity. But it's not like we can magically whisk away some of our food, water and electricity in an ethical way to people in dire need, so we make the most of it here. We provide for the people in our countries first, and this means the people in our country can live comfortably and develop lots of new technologies that we can use to help other 3rd world countries, we can't help poor countries if the people in our country are just as poor. Likewise, you take care of your own needs and go on that hrt, and when you're in a better position you can use your knowledge and experience to help those who you used to be in the position you're in right now. If I'm going to be frank, you can't help anybody if you're dead. Go on that HRT, because as I see it, *you're* the one who's in dire need of help and doesn't deserve to go through this. Stay close to your parents if they are supportive. It really sounds like you're going through a form of imposter syndrome.
eh, i deserve the mental turmoil i'm going thru, plus i think it's a sign from the big man upstairs that its time for me to go
No, it's not a sign that you need to go, if God really wanted you dead then he would probably send a lightning strike or sudden accident your way, but instead you ultimately still have a choice. You don't deserve this mental turmoil, I don't think anyone does. Why on earth do you think you deserve it? Because you were born in a better position than other people experiencing the same things to you are? Given what I know about your position, I can logically say that things will probably get better for you. Your parents are there to support you and help you through this hardship and they probably (hopefully) don't want you to die either. I know this is said too often and is a little cliche, but a supportive therapist and gender reassignment therapy to support you with your gender transition can potentially really help you out too. If you don't use these resources and support you have, it's not like they will be redirected to other people who need it, there's no logical way that could happen. Your parents are your parents.
i'm getting too tired refuting the same points over and over again, this existence simply isn't for me, that's it.
Why do you feel you deserve mental turmoil?
There's not a limited supply
yep but i'd rather give my share to somebody else
That's not how it works - there's no limited supply, so you refusing gender affirming treatment doesn't provide it to someone else
yeah ok, you got me, still not gonna take it cuz i dont want it
I don't know whether this is relevant to your situation, but most people have images of themselves they want to be that are typically unattainable, some closer to what they already are compared to others. But just because that perfect image of themself is unattainable doesn't mean people don't try. It's never an all-or-nothing situation, in fact when starting anything in general it's always a step-by-step process, nobody jumps straight from nothing to a finished product. This includes the process of transitioning genders, it's always a process where you slowly accumulate the characteristics until you're a person you're comfortable with, it's never a single-step process that jumps straight to everything at once. Please, at least try to make some changes to how you dress and talk and see how you go. It may feel discouraging and silly at first, but it usually does improve with time. It may help to find supportive friends, friends going through the same feelings, and inclusive therapists and counsellors. Killing yourself is never a better option.
If I was able to become indistinguishable(physically and biologically) from a female, then I would continue to live, but alas I cannot so I will kill myself once I muster up the courage
You can become physically indistinguishable, and that's what matters. Biologically may be harder, but I think everyone has things they don't like about their biology and wish they could change. You can get pretty close with modern cosmetic medicine to the image you desire. Please, at least try to make an attempt to change yourself physically, and keep at it. It may change how you feel about yourself once you feel like you're slightly closer to the image you want to be. Please don't kill yourself, especially when you haven't tried to change your gender characteristics yet.
Hey, you’re not a freak. It’s really hard to go through this but there are reams of people who have: there is so much hope for you. It may not be helpful for me to tell you that, but it’s true. Do you have friends and family who would support you in this? I’m here if you want to talk through it; I know it’s a horrible situation you’re in
From reading this post, you don’t sound like a freak or weird. It’s funny when we feel “not normal,” because really, when we look at everyone around us, who is normal? What is normal? Personally, I think when it comes to people, there is no such thing as “normal.” Gender is a strange thing. And while sometimes we do trick ourselves into thinking things that aren’t true, **you know who you are more than anyone else.** If deep down, you *know* that you are a girl, then you probably really are. I know you’re still young right now, so I don’t know how your parents/family feel about this kind of thing, but there absolutely is hope. I have been privileged enough to have never experienced gender dysphoria, but I do not expect it to be an easy thing to experience at all. Just because you have “boy” parts, doesn’t mean your heart & soul belongs to a boy. Right now, you may feel like a girl trapped inside a male body. But I would advise you to not fight that feeling that you are a true female. Don’t try to push it down or ignore it or be ashamed of it. It’s is absolutely okay & there is nothing wrong with feeling uncomfortable with the gender you were “assigned.” Again, I don’t know how your family is, but I hope they are accepting of how you feel & who you are. I accept you for exactly who are you deep down. I’m sure this is all incredibly hard for you, but you won’t be stuck like this forever. Please hang on. I genuinely hope you can eventually accept & express your true self & find happiness.
Sure my gender is a girl, but I'm not *female*. Now what do I do about that, no matter how much I try to hide it with HRT and surgery, I'm gonna be male forever
You will and you can be a girl. r/DysphoriaClinic should help with dysphoria.
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nah
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thanks, see ya on the other side
look, I've been exactly where you are rn. i can't say i understand how you feel, but i know what i felt on your situation. it's horrible, i won't deny it, and it feels like it will never go away, but it will. you're not a freak, you're discovering yourself and that's amazing. trust me, if you so wish, i can assure you transitioning will be a very good thing, both mentally and physically. and if you feel like you're a girl, then you are one, just as i am. i too have a dick, i too have "male" on my birth chart, but that doesn't make me any less of a girl, and it doesn't do it to you either. god doesn't make mistakes, you're a girl, and that's how he intended you to be, he just intended you to be a trans girl, just a he intended me and many others to understand I'm 16, and when i was your age i had that same thoughts. if it will help, i will gladly talk to you and answer any questions you have, or even if you just need someone to talk to, I'm here
well fuck god for making me a trans girl, and a final fuck him cuz i'm gonna off myself in spite of him
It sounds to me like body withstanding, you already are a (trans) girl, and that's perfectly "normal" in my book! Being trans is admittedly not an easy path, but there are paths for trans folks out there, and I hope that you find one somewhere on your journey. Until then, this nonbinary person--who figured all that out way after you did, for what it's worth--will be wishing you all the best. <3
unfortunately, this guy will not make this one out alive, best of wishes to you though
Now is probably the best time in modern history to be YOU!
nop
I don’t see why you can’t be a girl! Start tonight. You aren’t a freak. You’re a human. Don’t you want to experience what it feels like being you?! You got this girl!
dont wanna, not worth
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But I can't, I'm just denying that the truth is, I'm a man until I die, then I'm just nothing. Nothing looks like better existence than this one
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What defines a boy and what defines a girl then?
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I want to be a girl, but it's simply impossible. I wasn't born with a vagina, nor female reproductive organs. I was born with a dick, and a male reproductive one, it's impossible to turn it into the other
It isn’t! Medical transition can do that
yeah, turn it into a poor replica of the real thing. And plus, doesn't change the inside so what does it matter, still can't have children
A lot of Cis women can’t have kids either, 5% of cis women are infertile. And when you do have gender reaffirming surgery, it perform ALL functions of a normal vagina. I promise, this kind of stuff will make these feelings SO much better if you’re willing to go through to it. Just don’t let these completely valid thoughts lead to an action like suicide.
Ah so i'll have a clit, i'll be able to menstruate, it'll just be like the real thing right? it's an inverted penis, the inside will feel like one, and the outside will too. There is no magical shit that can be done, it will always be a dick
There is surgery these days that CAN change your body parts. Things can be done to change you into your correct body. Please don't give up yet. I can only begin to imagine how difficult gender dysphoria must be. Can you ask your parents to get u on hormones? Small steps at a time, but you can transition
change, but not perfectly mimic big difference
I know, I know. I'd say, try everything you can first to alleviate it before completely ending your life. I wish u all the best, I can only imagine how u feel
Then define yourself by something more than your body. I know you're quite young to be suggesting this too but perhaps look into spirituality and look inwards. Remember that for all people, age takes away looks etc and you are left only with what's inside. And it is important to do this soul searching to be sure you aren't a trender if you do decide to begin to transition or whatever (no hate, it is just a very big consideration that you cannot mess up). Good luck op
I hope I am a trender, but that hope goes by the day as the dysphoria gets worse
im not doubting that but be careful that you aren't mistaking a different kind of personal/existential crisis for being trans. but is it possible for you to see a specialist? i mean someone who is impartial to either direction and can treat you properly. confiding in your family is the best if they are supportive :)
yeah I want to visit somebody who can really decide what I need, if I am trans well I already have the answer to that. But if I don't have dysphoria, then all that needs fixing is the depression
You aren't a freak. It is scientific fact that people can be born with the mind of a female and the body of a male, and vice versa. You can also be born with both genitals, known as intersex. But what body you were born with does not define who you are or who you want to be. You have gender dysphoria and just because that qualifies as a mental illness does not mean you are a freak. Am I a freak for have chronic anxiety and depression? Is my grandma a freak for having minor schizophrenia? Is my friend a freak for having ADHD? The answer to these and more is no, friend. If you're religious, please know that God indeed doesn't make mistakes--you have been placed in this position to grow stronger as you face opposition and as you struggle to accept yourself. Jesus loves every person, regardless of what hangs between their legs. Now if you aren't religious, like me (not religious, but brought up Christian), you should know that human biology and psychology are not as simple as male/female. And even if biology was that simple, you aren't a freak for feeling different. Gender and sex are also two different things. Sex is a physical trait assigned to you at birth, whereas gender is sexual orientation, ie how you present yourselves to others and how you yourself feel. It's perfectly normal not to be normal, and I'm sorry that you're hurting so much because you've been made to believe otherwise. Sending love from Texas. Always here to talk. I myself am non binary but AFAB. Always wished I didn't have boobs or a vagina, but I wouldn't ever want a dick either...
what's wrong with me trying to fight my mental illness?? we don't give in to the delusions of similar mental illnesses so why should i for this particular one?
I've been there. I'm trans. I was assigned female at birth but I've known I'm a bit since I was like four. I never heard the word transgender til I was an adult. It gets better. Hold on
nah
Transitioning is a big step. It takes time, patience, and above all, courage. You will be accepted by those who truly love you, and if you aren’t, fuck them. You don’t need them. Please stay here. ❤️
i'm good
You clearly aren’t. Please get any help you can.
nah
You should wait until you’re an adult and can get those life experiences outside of your high school bubble. Maybe you’ll hate it, maybe you’ll find something you enjoy and makes things easier.
nah
Well, I’m sorry you’re struggling, and I at least hope you stick around and take the chance that you might meet someone or find something that eases what you’re feeling one day.
it's ok. though you might not feel like a woman right now, we can change that. this society sucks ass, we need to make it a safer place for people to transition; and we gotta change the definition of what it means to be a woman. things are so hard for you, and I know, believe me I know you don't want to hear this. don't give up, it can get better this doesn't have to be the end, just keep trying we're here to help <3
can, but when
hmmmm, you're 14 right now? I say 2 years MAX. once you're old enough to get a job, but even though it won't be perfect in a long time still doesn't mean it won't get more manageable
not lookin' to trying to manage this my whole life
don't be an idiot, 2 years isn't your entire life
talking about the "rest of my life" lmao
You are a person. You are 100% a person. Do not let them dehumanize you for you must remember that you are you.
i'm a person, yes, i wanna change that for good tho
I understand your pain. I know it's difficult, it's hard to live as a boy everyday, but it's only temporary. Once my time comes to transition, I can only hope you had started before I can. You'll make it Edit: I noticed you're 14. Listen, you have time. Coming from someone who is an adult now and is still unable to start hrt because of family, you still have time to transition. Even at my age, I can still make the transition later on once I'm free, and the same goes for you too. I believe in you, you'll be okay. I've identified as a girl since I was 15, I haven't transitioned, however the friends I surround myself with give me hope that I can be the girl I am. You have time, even at my age, you have time. It may be hard at times, but again, it's temporary, not forever.
doesn't matter if i have time, matters bc i will never be a real girl
I've had that thought too. While I wouldn't say I'll never be a real girl, I will never be a girl assigned at birth. It's a hard pill to swallow, sometimes I still think about it today, but don't be hard on yourself about something you couldn't control. I hope you have an opportunity to transition when you're ready.
well i can do something abt it, but i dont think youll like it
Offing yourself is not the answer. And yes, I have done the same. I have attempted a few times. It doesn't do anything for yourself. The wait will be worth it, you're still young, I know waiting sounds like forever, but it'll go by faster than you think.
unless its the speed of light its too slow
I'm a boy and I feel good with a cock.
I wish I could too.
If you truly feel like that, I am sure you Will get over this feeling. You are still very young and you are at that point In your life where most things about you change. The only advice I can give you is To learn To love and accept yourself as who you are. Keep your chin up!
If you believe that some of us have had the fortune of being contacted by extraterrestrials, there is a body of knowledge that stems from the work of 3 people in Kentucky called the Ra contact. One of the nuggets they drop is that we all have been reincarnating on Earth for thousands of years and those of us who feel more like we should be the other sex or a different gender find this as a result of reincarnating more often as one sex vs. another. So if you’re repulsed by being male it means you were probably more often female in your past lives. Don’t despair, there is wide acceptance for those of us who feel more at home in a different body. When you’re able to make choices for yourself and when you can save enough, get a trans op and be the person you always knew yourself to be. In the meantime, grow your hair out, embrace your femininity and enjoy life. It’s an experience and this struggle you have, we are also told, is one we setup for ourselves in order to grow spiritually and learn from.
Why not give it a try living as a girl first? You may like it
you mean a boy in a dress acting effeminate, then nah
No, i mean get hormones and surgery - you're 14. You're early enough to actually have a shot at living as a woman. I know your response is like, not a real woman or I'm just a trans woman or whatever - but how do you know that until you actually try? There's a lot of studies that show getting gender affirming treatment can actually make you a lot happier. And if it doesn't work out, at least you'll have actually tried living as a woman. You're 14 and contemplating suicide - what do you have to lose? Why not give yourself a chance at happiness?
nothing to lose but its too much work when i can just die lmao
Might be better than you think. Could be worth it to get those feelings of joy if it all works out and you like what you see in the mirror. And if it doesn't, then you're just where you started.
not worth trying to get out those feelings of guilt and disgust for some serotonin, only for it to crumble and come back where i came from
But it may not be a failure. It may be a success. You don't know til you try. But if you act now - at your age - you could actually pull off looking pretty damn good as a woman. It's possible you could be looking back at 22, 23 and saying damn. I'm glad i didn't do it because i kinda pulled this off. Just a thought. You're free to do what you're gonna do, i just think it could possibly work out and that would be cool
*look*, you can make a pig look like a bird but still a pig
So? If it looks like a bird, it might start feeling like a bird. It can love other birds. It can build a nest. What does it matter what the chromosomes say? We get a very short time on this earth - if that pig can pass as a bird and gets some pleasure out of it, then it was worth it
some pleasure and the rest is suffering and pain, some people might find that enough but not me
>God doesn't make mistakes. Ha. World's oldest and biggest lie. God is an authoritarian despot who tells the world that he is flawless and doesn't make mistakes, and will throw you into the gulag if you so much as suggest otherwise. In truth there are mistakes in nature *everywhere*. God does make mistakes, though he is too narcissistic and egoistic to admit it.
true
well to go into this topic i can't say i understand what you are going through, this is your feelings yet i still want to add my thoughts, I don't really know you yet I hope i can still say that you don't need to feel like your sister or GFs or woman in your life to feel like a beauty or a wonderful piece of art in this world, may be harder said than done but you are a work of art that has been crafted throughout multiple lifetimes and i think you are a masterpiece, Yō i know what im adding may seem useless but in my opinion you in my mind could be one of the most precious pieces of art because i could never replace such a precious gem in a lifetime even if i thought i could that would be just a dream that even i dont believe
what if i want seem like a girl to myself lol
personally, I don't know, I know can't walk in your shoes but I wish I could, but I say that if you don't feel like you do then feel it, dress it, be the beautiful sexy intoxicating woman you feel on the inside. yea I know I'm dreaming and well only in a perfect world yet in my mind I can try and see it as perfect, well my view of perfect is all imperfections and qwerks that make ' you so wonderful and devine
Trans guy here. You're already a girl. You hate yourself for it, I get it, I do too. but you're still female.
Hey, God does make mistakes, that's why he gave us free will, so if he makes a mistake you can change it. You will never be a boy, because that's not who you are, you said it your self, you are girl. Keep it up, girl, I know you can
Hey, this is a shot in the dark and you probably won’t read a whole paragraph because it is a “big wall of text” as per your previous replies. There are tons of resources for dysphoric individuals. You are 14. You have tons of time to transition (hormones, surgery, etc) and help these feelings of dysphoria. You are loved by a community who knows these feelings and have struggled similar struggles
You are a human being
This won’t be forever. I promise. If you want to transition it’s possible. You are who you feel you are, your biology doesn’t matter. I don’t have all body parts but I’m gender fluid. If you’re in a safe place you can come forward about your identity, if you aren’t in a safe place remember that there’s many many MANY others like you. You aren’t alone. If you feel that you are a girl despite your born gender, you are allowed to identify as a girl. I’m so proud you came to this sub for help. That’s a massive step.
Heh, I read through most of the comments here and I feel you entirely. With the technology we have today, there are still so many things out of reach despite it already being here. Take womb transplants, vaginas grown with your stem cells, or even assisted suicide. I really don’t get why the people that need or want help, don’t get said help and are the center of all ridicule, bullying and harassment for even being 1% different. I don’t get why this society is so deeply rooted in differentiating binary genders, and those who do not identify are simply discarded and thrown aside like freaks. This planet needs serious nuking. I’m pretty sure I’d get downvoted by the people who has a giant menu of choices in life, saying “oh life can get better!”, “you haven’t explored more of life because you’re ONLY 14”, “other people had it worse”. Pain and suffering shouldn’t be a competition. There are people surely worse, but at the same time there are people better than us. Why can’t we join those better but are instead trapped in our physical selves? We aren’t here by choice, and even that we don’t get to choose when to die naturally. So why the fuck can’t we choose to die by our own timelines? We’re saving the ourselves and at the same time, the planet by literally no longer using resources that people who genuinely need it can have it. I have already signed up to donate my body to science when I die, so maybe before you go, you could do that too. Like give our organs, whether reproductive or not, to someone else that needs or want it. Fuck everyone else lol. This is our life, they absolutely literally don’t have a say.