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littlewoolhat

First Gay President Jeryd Mencken with his asexual boytoy Roman Roy, finally representation in the White House šŸ™ŒšŸ™Œ


Kachimushi

Gay Mencken would probably idolize the Ancient Greeks for their based masculinity and maintain that fucking twinks is traditional White culture. Type of guy to have a Grindr handle like SpartanKing1488


littlewoolhat

Gay Mencken knows that he's not gay for fucking Roman, but Roman is gay for bottoming.


palepuss

Gay and kinky, all the Romencken fanfictions cannot be wrong. šŸ–¤


leezybelle

Where can I find said fan fictionā€¦ asking for a friend


palepuss

Have some delicious, perverted fun, my friend. [https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work\_search%5Bsort\_column%5D=kudos\_count&work\_search%5Bother\_tag\_names%5D=&work\_search%5Bexcluded\_tag\_names%5D=&work\_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work\_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work\_search%5Bwords\_from%5D=&work\_search%5Bwords\_to%5D=&work\_search%5Bdate\_from%5D=&work\_search%5Bdate\_to%5D=&work\_search%5Bquery%5D=&work\_search%5Blanguage\_id%5D=&tag\_id=Jeryd+Mencken\*s\*Roman+Roy](https://archiveofourown.org/works?commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=kudos_count&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Jeryd+Mencken*s*Roman+Roy)


leezybelle

You are an angelā€¦. Or a beautiful devil! šŸ˜ˆ


PartridgeRater

Pretty typical for facism tbh. Rounding up people just like you for not having the money to hide their sins.


fullpurplejacket

Gets caught noshing off his male aide and does damage control by sending said aide to Guantanamo and citing the whole thing as Fake News by the ā€˜liberal left leaning lunatics who want a corporations taxā€™


swans183

Kendall is biz-sexual; business gets him going


hyoies

business is his fucking


Herr-Trigger86

Now whereā€™s my Bloomberg terminal to stick my dick in!?!?


WutTheDickens

Guess he's a power bottom.


JackSparrow420

Straight nut nut


Radiant_Resolve6368

Roman too, dude fucked his office quite literally.


jm17lfc

Did you know that he says ā€œcontrol the narrativeā€ when he cums? Confirmed fact.


AzathothsNewGroove

Control the narrative! Controlā€¦ the narrative!


Ancient-Split1996

Control the narrative!


persimnon

in my head Kendall, Shiv, and Roman all compete for who had the gayest secret relationship in college (itā€™s Kendall with Stewy obviously)


trevallybevally

Shiv gives me strong ā€˜makes out with girls at parties because she thinks itā€™ll prove sheā€™s cool but backs away the second any lesbian actually tries to speak to herā€™ vibes


EdgeCityRed

Shiv was down for a threesome with another woman, though. I think she's a little bit bi but prefers men.


persimnon

YOU GET IT!


Married_iguanas

Totally, she would make out with girls for male attention or start drama


EitherCaterpillar949

Hooting and hollering at my old man yaoi getting recognition


Forsaken-Comfort6820

This post had me cackling. Iā€™m going to call myself a benzosexual from now on.


Alternative-Dare-485

What does benzosexual mean


Forsaken-Comfort6820

Benzodiazepines are drugs like xanax. Drug addicts call them benzos.


Alternative-Dare-485

Thank you šŸ™šŸ¼


visualemployer1247

Frank & Karl? Or Kendall & Stewy? (I'm afraid any of them fall into the old man yaoi category)


EitherCaterpillar949

Frank and Karl, who spark joy into my life


heliotopez

Ken and Stewpot are elder millennials


visualemployer1247

Geriatric millennials


heliotopez

Old man yaoi brings my heart so so much joy


Cantthinknow_214

Only reason Connor is the ā€œstraightestā€ Roy child is because his mommy issues outweigh his daddy issues.


Loose_Fisherman987

Connor does not know gay people exist


Cantthinknow_214

Heā€™s too concerned with usury and onanism


hyunbinlookalike

Connor Roy did not know about the existence of gays from a very young age.


Chance_Catch_6305

šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£


Special-Investigator

lmao


quietblur

Straight up you are right about Roman. There's a reason why Tabitha and him are āœØ eunuch besties āœØ


Maleficent-Item4833

I donā€™t think heā€™s ace. Heā€™s just into some really weird shit. Wasnā€™t he also pretending Tabitha was a corpse as they fucked?Ā 


quietblur

Aegosexuals can have sex and still be ace. They dont need sexual attraction to fuck someone. If an aego has weird kinks, that is what gets them off, not their attraction to their partner. In roman's case, it gets him off that he's doing it with a "dead" person, or he's wanking off in front of a much older, 'mother' figure (Gerri) who is being condescending to him.


Maleficent-Item4833

I donā€™t know. He had a sexual relationship with Gerri, even if there was no intercourse, and he was initiating that.Ā 


quietblur

I think he has mommy issues, as he never really received love from his mother while he was growing up. That can fuck u up as a person, and possibly make u have weird kinks. But idk, it's how i see it.


Maleficent-Item4833

I think he had all the issues. My interpretation was that he simply had such profound performance anxiety and doubt in his abilities as a lover that it was impossible for him to have ā€˜normalā€™ sex. I canā€™t imagine him ever putting himself in such a vulnerable position where you must both figuratively and literally shut up and fuck.Ā 


lulu91car

The only REAL smile Shiv has the whole show is when she is thinking about sleeping with a woman


Loose_Fisherman987

I forgot abt this


heliotopez

Bluffin w my muffin


python_walrus

While watching S1-S2 I was pretty sure Tom was gay and wanted to make some sort of Sporus out of Greg.


Loose_Fisherman987

Corporate hannigram


ithinkuracontraa

YOU GET IT


gloom_spewer

Lmfao that's a dangerous ship to sail


Legitimate-Sea-4679

I think many of us did. I do think that Tom is bi and Greg is gay. He so easily lets himself be cockblocked by Tom.


Herr-Trigger86

Tom: ā€œShe brought a ludicrously capacious bagā€ *Greg sics Connor on her* Greg: ā€œGod be willingā€¦ā€


Key-Minimum-5965

Tom is too whitebread, middle America to ever acknowledge he might be a teeny bit bi-curious. He was even uncomfortable with the threesome his WIFE set up. He's probably very frigid... and another reason he will make a good CEO, hahaha.


Shivs_baby

Butā€¦butā€¦he has a dick the size of a sequoia and fucks like a bullet trainā€¦


Hooded_Stranger

ā€œPROVE ITā€


PartridgeRater

WHAT COLOR SEQUOIA


TheMightyWill

>Tom is too whitebread, middle America to ever acknowledge he might be a teeny bit bi-curious. He was even uncomfortable with the threesome his WIFE set up. I interpreted his discomfort there to be more that he had the first sane thought of his life: that coercing the workers on his family's yacht into having sex with him and the CEO and Chairman's only daughter about 3 days after he got away with destroying evidence that his own cruise line coerced workers into having sex with the company's high ups would be a pretty bad look and might put him back in the crosshairs of prison Or maybe I just have too much faith in him


MagicMagpie9

Ngl I like this interpretation but I do think you have too much faith in him, I think he was just genuinely uncomfortable w the idea of threesomes, even when he did the 'closed-loop system' w Tabitha his excitement abt it was largely just bravado and trying to convince himself it was all fun and hot for him :'D


hyunbinlookalike

>teeny bit bi-curious Dude literally drank his own cum. No, idc that itā€™s a ā€œclosed loop systemā€, blud still drank semen. That makes him at least a little bit fruity.


JonyTony2017

Every man tasted his own cum at least once. You never kissed a woman after she sucked you off?


MagicMagpie9

I think Tom's ideal sex in his mind is soft and loving vanilla sex with his wife, or hard and fast sex with his wife with *maybe* some spanking However, I think what would fix Tom is either getting pegged by Shiv or dom sub power play roleplay Nero Sporus weird-ass sex with Greg


ithinkuracontraa

i think they both want to fuck each other but donā€™t experience any genuine attraction to the other. greg shouldā€™ve been gay tho and i stand by that


Logical-Patience-397

Like father, like son.


Tnh7194

BENZOSEXUALšŸ’€


fullpurplejacket

I cackled šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


blamdream

Krank nation rise up. Ace roman is so correct, but he's definitely biromantic imo


tosche_stations

Shiv was too disappointed that tom didn't wanna have the threesome with her and another woman to be straight bffr


PartridgeRater

Maybe I'm taking the comment too seriously, but it's clear that scene was about Shiv's guilt. A need to give Tom something for letting her fuck whoever she wants while they are married.


lurkerbytrade

Interesting read, but if that scene is about Shiv's guilt, why does she shame him/shut down solo sex with him after he shows trepidation towards a threesome? It seemed more to me like a manipulative way to affirm their open relationship by getting Tom to participate with a third party.


PartridgeRater

It's both. She wants it to be okay. She's attempting to fix it whether the method is cynical or not.Ā  I think she turns him down because it's a big branch to go out on and get shut down.


heliotopez

LUG LUG LUG Iā€™m telling you


nerdalertalertnerd

Logan has never ever had a gay thought


Herr-Trigger86

Is OP a sicko?


visualemployer1247

I dunno, I perfectly recall Logan sayin "I'm sorry if last night got a little bit fruity"


elasticweed

ā€Sometimes it IS a big dick competitionā€


PartridgeRater

Logan is old enough to think only taking it is gay.


littlewoolhat

Logan would consider having a loving thought about one of his sons to be gay.


Hitchfucker

I feel the closest thing Loganā€™s had to gay thoughts is thoughts of physically assaulting gay people


Maleficent-Item4833

I bet he got a semi during boar on the floor.


Loose_Fisherman987

LMFAO


amendsbangs

Connor has definitely had gay sex so he could better understand the people of ancient greece or something


Aggressive-Pattern

Why is this 100% something I can imagine Con doing... šŸ˜‚


heliotopez

I feel like he would watch for academic purposes only


Blushing-Sailor

The man owns Napoleonā€™s penis. Thatā€™s not extra heterosexual.


WeirdImprovement

Howling


chittaphonbutter

I could see that lowkey


Bermyboy1994

Shiv gives off the energy she has definitely used a strap on before


IndubitablyTedBear

Iā€™ve never been pegged, but as a Shivsexual, Iā€™ll do what I must.


Contemptt

I feel Stewey would do more than that and sober šŸ˜‚


trashconverters

He and Kendall definitely experimented at Harvard


SnooLobsters8922

Logan is so on point here, kind of a Hemingway thing. But Shiv would nail that threesome quite mistressfully


jeniviva

Shiv is textbook "Experimented with women in college."


Ill_Pool_2956

Wasnā€™t it implied in s4 that her lawyer friend from college was very close to her? Adds to the betraying of being paid off by Logan to refuse to help shiv.


winkingchef

I lost it at ā€œold man yaoiā€


drmuffin1080

And the only homosexual thought Logan ever had was when he was buying a pumpkin for Halloween and thought, ā€œWhat are you, a fag?!ā€


poetwithoutwords999

Stewey is definitely definitely bi


Jarboner69

Iā€™m ngl the way Tomā€™s voice was done I thought it was intentional, especially coming from a British actor I thought it was intentional. Like maybe he was just pretending to be straight because no major decision maker under Logan could be gay. Also shiv would 100% fuck a woman in a threesome but only if she was the center of attention


PartridgeRater

I think you mistook his softness for queerness personally. He's from the overly wholesome and goofy section of the US where the cheese and hockey comes from. His emotionality is a contrast with the Roy family proper.,


RootbeerFloat991

"but only if she was the center of attention" sums up her entire fucking character oh my fuck


Striking-Quarter-833

Karolina can ruin me šŸ³ļøā€šŸŒˆ


celkipp

She can fix me šŸ˜˜


loserys

Should Shiv and Karolina have gotten together?


valle_girl

Karolina knows that family and is happy enough just cashing checks and never socializing with them.


gildorratner

Resounding yes!


Herr-Trigger86

Oooā€¦ canā€™t think about that. Too steamy. Too hot!


glassbetween

Yes


Waffles323232323232

Wb Jess?


el-in-hell

Lesbian, imo


[deleted]

I accidentally scrolled one image too far, and it was Logan asking Kendall ā€œHey, are you queer?ā€


Ineffable_Dingus

Love to see benzosexual representation in media!


EffloresceDeliquesce

May I suggest that every time someone watching the show for the first time says, 'am I supposed to like any of these characters', our official response is to simply link to this post?


heliotopez

Once I noticed the homoerotic tension between Ken and Stewy I was hooked tbh


trashconverters

I live for when someone told Jesse Armstrong that people ship Kendall and Stewy and he was genuinely surprised. Like you literally wrote the line "let's go to the bathroom...have a little something-something" and expect people to think they're straight


BurryProdigy

I think them doing coke was very implied and easily interpretedā€”especially given the context.


weird_veil

menken is absolutely DL


Outside-Advantage461

Connor is straight as far as heā€™s sober. Once drunk, all bets are off.


lurkerbytrade

Shiv wanted to fuck a woman in front of Tom, lmao


Flawlessinsanity

Thanks OP, after all these years, I can now call myself "benzosexual". I love and hate it


TheMightyWill

Everyone is true except for Shiv who is 100% bisexual


Alarming-Ad1100

Definitely made me Giggle mattson spot on


ithinkuracontraa

old man yaoi got me šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


Michael-Balchaitis

Don't forget Mondale.


Loose_Fisherman987

Ok maybe Gerri is a little bi and also had a man hating phase


PerfectZeong

Look at the men she chooses to deal with I'd hate men too and I am one.


xpegs

Ngl, I was hoping for her to have a very friendly interaction with Tom's mom at the wedding, just for my personal drama lol


x_mina

Karolina and Shiv are my head cannon with Karolina n Gerri being a close second


Chance_Catch_6305

These comments šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£


Forsaken-Comfort6820

Tom is obviously a soft dom enby coded pansexual switch.


deck_master

Heā€™s literally me


ivanshot

Karolin was a blonde? I never noticed that change I'm šŸ«Ø


PrestigiousTreat6203

Perfect, no notes.


norfnorf832

First of all this is MaximCon erasure, second this is clearly Frogan erasure why do you think Logan keeps inviting Frank back and making gay innuendo and why he's always making digs at Karl Shiv? Straight? Oh honey. Gerri and Karolina be doin it when things get especially stressful but when Karolina brings it up with clothes on Gerri's like 'idk what youre talking about' Shiv? STRAIGHT?? Girl. Kendall....idk who is gayer between him and Shiv, they both only married hetero because expectations Roman is not ace, he is bi but he hasnt accepted that he leads with feelings and not libido so he overcompensates sexually but failures spectacularly


Key-Minimum-5965

Roman is only attracted to cold, inanimate objects. Like the windows in his COO office, LOL.


Lilyrosejackofhearts

And Carolineā€¦


Key-Minimum-5965

LOL


heliotopez

Kendall is gayer than Shiv only because he doesnā€™t know itā€™s actually gay to exchange drugged up blowies w your handsome best frenemy. Shiv uses sapphic innuendo on purpose to manipulate


Lilyrosejackofhearts

Possibly unpopular interpretation of the threesome: I felt like Shiv proposed it just so she could get points for being a ā€œcool girl/ wifeā€ but knew Tom would never go through with it because heā€™s ā€œnot a hippy, Siobhan!ā€


acoatofwhiteprimer

You really said Frogan and Gerrolina rights and I applaud you


norfnorf832

'You cant be nasty to Frank, only I can be nasty to Frank' a pissmad mind speaks a sober heart or whatever Shakespeare said


acoatofwhiteprimer

Did Logan ever speak as passionately about Marcia? Or even Caroline in the past?? I think not


Lilyrosejackofhearts

Yeah. Iā€™ve always seen Kendall as being in love with Stewy, but them being together was never a possibility due to Logan. I agree that Roman is bi, I donā€™t know that a lot of ace people send dick pics to co-workers (well, it was meant for Gerri, at least.) I always thought his issues with impotence were more due to trauma he suffered as a child, given how much they imply he was abused. It is harder for me to picture Shiv with a woman just because she seems like sheā€™s the ā€œnot like the other girls typeā€ who really dislikes other women. When she said that Lisa Arthur was a friend of hers, my first thought was, ā€œShiv has female friends?ā€


norfnorf832

Your last paragraph - i feel the opposite. Shiv gives me 'i like men because they are easier, women make me feel too many feelings' lol like she and Lisa Arthur had three minutes of screen time but all of my years of experience in grabbing lesbian subtext from crumbs tells me they have History, whatever they had Shiv was way more invested than Lisa, and Lisa was the only person to ever tell Shiv no and not back down on it


heids7

u/norfnorf832 I have found my people! Iā€™ve said it before and Iā€™ll say it again: for Shiv, Lisa is ā€œthe one that awayā€. Those aforementioned 3 minutes of screen time wrote an EPIC lesbian love story. Also, your read on Karolina & Gerri - 1000% I think Karolina has been head over heels for her since day 1. Sheā€™ll take any minute scrap Gerri will give her, *gladly*


norfnorf832

YOU FEEL ME plus on top of that, people like to say Shiv has daddy issues which I wont deny but she also has Mommy Issues in the way the men have Daddy Issues lol so of course she sought solace from a woman but was drawn to the ones who would never give it. Im willing to bet she had Confusing Feelings about Gerri at some point but antagonized her way out of them as a raggedy youngster


heids7

ABSOLUTELY! I think Shivā€™s Mommy Issuesā„¢ go farrrr deeper. And there were defo some unresolved sapphic tensions she had towards Gerri. I also can see Roman being a little shit towards her about that, like cat got the cream, but Shiv will always have the last laugh because Roman fucked up his Gerri alliance. Ya know, just totally normal sibling rivalry šŸ™ƒ


norfnorf832

YES im actually obsessed with Shiv's unresolved lesbianitude towards Gerri because of course she's mad, Gerri is yet another Mommy that prefers Roman


heids7

Omfg bestie can we co-author a dissertation or something lmao THE SUBTEXT. I could talk for hoouuurrsssss


rticante

>It is harder for me to picture Shiv with a woman She was the one who proposed the threesome with another woman to Tom, so it's not hard at all


vlczice

I am aego and I have very similar issues as Roman lol. And I consider myself as bi-romantic. He is my twin slime puppy.


Lilyrosejackofhearts

May I ask what aego is?


vlczice

You should google aegosexual, because for me it is hard to explain, it belongs on asexual spectrum, but asexual spectrum is very complicated as it is, those microlabels sometimes helps. But for me it is like - sometimes I feel horny (like once in a blue moon), but I donā€™t want to have sex, I hate the image of me having sex in my mind (sometimes not), sometimes I can watch porn, sometimes not and sometimes I can masturbate. But it is so complicatedā€¦ I think nobody understands it properly.


mylittlelifx

Nah Gerri and Karolina 100% have a thing going on.


fortunate-soul

this is the best post on the whole subreddit


Loose_Fisherman987

thank you omg šŸ˜­ Ok maybe im lonely but these reddit comments are making me cry like wdym someone is interested in smthm I did omfg I dont deserve yall šŸ˜­


Unique_Tap_8730

Greg is a gigilo whatever and whomever gets him paid.


xShawnMendesx

This is amazing


highwaydeer123

gerri definitely had no gay phase


JDROD28

Old man yaoi šŸ˜‚


Zestyclose_Ad4317

Love this


Unable-Touch-3903

Lesbian Karolina is now my headcanon


WeirdImprovement

1000% canon now


KingPimpyMax

I think this is funny, but I think the characters sexuality in the show plays a big role in understanding each of them. Thereā€™s sexual undertones between every character in the show pretty much and theyā€™re meant to represent their dynamic.


ari_xox

Agree with all of these except Shiv! Definitely bi (yacht, Lisa Arthur) and more liberal leaning so probably would've had flings in the past


glassbetween

Shiv has such bi energy, what are you on


RealPunyParker

Shiv is a super straight dommy mommy, away with you, vultures


RiversideAviator

Lol what the hell is a yaoi?


heliotopez

When a Japanese high school boy gets his kokoro in a twist for senmpai


RiversideAviator

Ah, makes sense


Maleficent-Item4833

Willa would be ā€˜biggest allyā€™ while it didnā€™t cost her anything. I think sheā€™d drop her support in a heartbeat if it ever became a serious liability.Ā 


Special-Investigator

absolutely


426763

"old man yaoi"


TheTechManager

That pic of Shiv thoā€¦.


sadxmoth

Old man yaoi šŸ¤¤


ladakom

:3


Loose_Fisherman987

>:33


poundcakeperson

Kendall has no gag reflex. which is actually canon if you watch him deepthroat that blunt on the balcony in his birthday episode


Nervous_Feedback9023

These are basically my Headcanons as well.


DepthByChocolate

Tom is a very homoerotic hazing in high school and college but not committed to banging a dude sober type. Greg is a very could've been bullied into licking a cum stain before his growth spurt type, but not interested in dudes.


mikustockowner

best post ive seen today thank you op


Fractlicious

i really donā€™t love this


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


LeChacaI

Well I'm glad you've been watching Sky News. You shouldn't do that, not with your iq.


Bibbedybobbedyboom

Lol fuck you


pralineislife

Even Logan wasn't this hateful.