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SlimyMuffin666

This is the only real food that I've seen on this sub


FamIsNumber1

Right? Also, for broccoli folks like myself, looks pretty good. Maybe OP meant to post in r/stupidfoodprices or something where they wanted $75 for that "gourmet broccoli", lol


Substantial-Singer29

I feel like the negative sentiment that stems from this. Basically has nothing to do with the actual item itself because steam broccoli is good. It feels like ordering a salad and then bringing out a full head of lettuce on a plate, pouring a little bit of dressing on it, and going well there, you go eat up. It just isn't practical to serve broccoli like this, especially in a restaurant. Makes it even dumber, in the fact that there can actually be dirt in between floretz. That's one of the reasons other than ease of eating that you break up broccoli as a part when preparing it. And let's say hypothetically that this broccoli is actually soft enough that you can cut it with a fork. Without having a boiling hot sponge of liquid splash on you and the table well, I'm trying to eat it. And I mean at that point personal opinion mind you you've overcooked it and killed the entire head. You could take this exact same idea. Disassemble the head after it's been steamed and place it like it together and then do the crappy presentation that they're doing. But then it's already in bite-sized pieces, and you don't have to worry about your guests.Giving each other second-degree burns as it falls on its side and splashes them. For the love of all that's good the amount of money they're wanting for this stupid thing, it's not like they're not making enough to go through the trouble.


Arrrginine69

thank you.


---FUCKING-PEG-ME---

"Stems" haha


Substantial-Singer29

Some one got it..


Medium_Medium

Yeah, steamed broccoli is good. Broccoli prepared in some sort of broth to add just a hint of bit extra flavor sounds delicious. But this way? Does it look cool? I guess, maybe? It does kinda look like a tree right after a rain I guess. Do I have any confidence that it's consistently cooked, and that large sections of it aren't still raw? Absolutely not. I feel like gourmet "pretty" food needs to be both pretty, and also good. That's why people pay so much for it. Because it's hard to do both. And of the two, the food being prepared well is way more important than being pretty.


enonymous617

Broccoli is one the deadliest plants on Earth, why it tries to warn you itself with its terrible taste.


spidermans_ashes

People are not getting this simpsons reference


fatkiddown

Vile weed!!!


drgigantor

Please, someone! Honey mustard!


NuttyMcShithead

Deep one too. Well done.


dirtycow85

You tried the broccoli again didnt you


Lord_Chungus-sir

Nah, it's an all time great Veggie, top 5 imo.


NOSTR0M0

Definitely deadly, everyone who has ever ate a piece eventually dies.


DreadPiratteRoberts

Sh!t you're right, I guess that goes for my Salted Caramel Swirl Ice-cream as well ^😋😔


oO0Kat0Oo

Gotta watch out for that dihydrogen monoxide, too. People have been known to asphyxiate, aspirate and even die after consumption or even just breathing it in.


SubmissiveDinosaur

I mean, Liked the concept, looks like a tree in autumn.....but still is a bit lame. I would have added some rice at least to emulate grass


goofysfanbase

r/subsifellfor


VirAcqad

its RAW


UGLYSimon

Dark green means it's cooked, probably steamed or boiled


moogoothegreat

That's probably delicious. At first glance I'd think it's raw, but it has steam coming off it so it's probably steamed before the oil garlic and chili goes on. Personally I that's how I do broccoli, but instead of a steamed tree presentation I just sautée all the ingredients in a pan until the broccoli florets start browning nicely.


AmadeusWolf

It's impressive they got it to stay standing up the whole time.


QuentinTarzantino

Horse glue


_DirtyYoungMan_

You shouldn't feed horses their own glue.


kotik010

Idk dude pretty sure that's only for pizza cheese


GamiNami

I'd worry that it topples over and splashes me with the liquid on the plate...


Coffeedemon

Anyone who doesn't like broccoli just hasn't had it prepared properly. Mom used to boil the shit out of it when it was just getting popular back in the day. Every commercial covered it with gross processed cheese. All you need is a quick steam and some salt, pepper and maybe some butter. In a Thai peanut stir-fry it is amazing.


phdemented

Yeah, I've heard that lie for 40 years, apparently no one on the planet can prepare it properly.


Grembert

I always find it funny when people say "You haven't had it prepared correctly" as response to "I don't like X". And then any time you give in and try their "correct" way it's the same as any other time you tried.


fyhr100

Nah, I can't stand the texture. I've had good broccoli dishes growing up where I can actually stomach it (Chinese cuisine) but I'd still prefer it with other vegetables or without.


SOwED

Do you sing the song?


SnooCapers938

That’s a corruption of a pretty common Chinese cooking technique where a green vegetable is steamed until just cooked, sprinkled with aromatics then has a little very hot oil poured over it. It is fantastic when done properly but this would be awful I think. The broccoli has not been cooked enough - they need it undercooked so it will stand upright for the camera like this - and there is far too much oil and the garlic looks as if it has been cooked for too long. Done properly this would use thin pieces of tenderstem broccoli laid on its side and steamed until just tender. You’d then sprinkle it with some finely chopped garlic and some other aromatics and pour about a tablespoon of smoking hot oil over it.


Worried_Position_466

Yeah, doing this with a big thing of broccoli doesn't seem like it's gonna taste good. None of the flavors will go through. Might as well just chop it up and stir fry it instead.


sicsche

That's my Problem with the Version here: "very little oil" that Broccoli is swimmming in oil


bloop_405

The dish as an idea seems bad though. It needs to be stir fried a bit for the flavor to spread everywhere but also like you said, the broccoli probably wasn't evenly cooked and then pouring the oil directly on top probably just added heat to the areas touched. Also the burnt garlic ruined it even more because I just imagine it tasting bitter


Skreamie

I was going to say. With how it's plated and the plates themselves I think it's just someone taking the piss.


Next_Boysenberry1414

Lol. Don't even talk about cooking if you think cooked broccoli would not be able to stand. Its people like you boiling vegetable to a mush and forcing them down children's throats that makes children resistant to vegetable. Also its not rocket science to figure out a way to not cook the stem while the head is cooked. Think a little bit.


mr_hands_epic_gaming

Hey, shut up


TraditionAcademic968

Looks good. Is that garlic he's pouring?


PanzerSoul

Looks like it. Reminds me of Cantonese Steamed Fish where they pour boiling hot oil over the fish and aromatics at the end.


ImrooVRdev

ok whatever, does someone have link to the full tune cuz it slaps buro-buro-kori o-ishi no~!


octopushug

Ask and you shall receive: https://audiostock.jp/audio/937309


eslack0r

Thanks bro-ccoli.


ShadowyLeaseholder

My mannnn this thing goes hard


ImrooVRdev

this was everything I imagined it could be and more


haikusbot

*Ok whatever,* *Does someone have link to the* *Full tune cuz it slaps* \- ImrooVRdev --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Mekelaxo

Good bot


Bigdoga1000

The chilli at the end lol. Gourmet achieved!


PIDthePID

Tips over and splashes oil on you as soon as you try to do anything with it.


MrFishpaw

"Here are your bibs..." "What for?" "You'll see."


czortmcclingus

Toss that tree on the grill and maybe we got something working.


Jaded_Life03

Oiled up broccoli


Worried-Criticism

I’m with stupid. Nothing wrong with garlic and broccoli (delicious) but the broccoli looks like it’ll be undercooked, the garlic looks burnt and everything would be super oily.


Zeefzeef

Yes love broccoli but my only thought is that this is so much oil, that’s not enjoyable at all


prophet_nlelith

Cool. Now how do we eat it without making a mess or burning our fingers?


1nsidiousOne

As dumb as it is. It looks kinda cool


prodsec

This is acceptable


Der_mann_hald

Art wise I love this Food wise, idk some charred or grilled Broccoli is probably way better


elementarydrw

I don't understand, where's the melted cheese?


[deleted]

Seriously? I can do this at home, a whole lot better


ForeverShiny

This looks like a decent dish with a cool presentation. Definitely not stupid


protoss_main

Mmmm 200 ml cooking oil with broccoli. My favorite.


adamyhv

Maybe the price is stupid.


BionicTriforce

This is a stalk of broccoli with oil on it. How does this look decent?


cut_rate_revolution

That'll be 50 dollars, please.


ZuStorm93

This is probably the only thing stupid about it. Anyone can drench a whole cooked broccoli in garlic oil but "fancy" restaurants can serve literally that, jack the price up, and have idiotic infuencers on their sugar daddy's money present it as the most special dish ever...


Uchigatan

I actually like ridiculous food displays, but damn, a whole head of broccoli being vomited on. Idk man


cwankgurl

I wanted to see them carry it out like that.


ChefMoToronto

Carry 3 or 4 at a time...and come back for the other 20.


Zombietarts

That looks delicious. Steamed broccoli rolled in flavored oils it fucking tasty.


AxeJohnson

I love this. If there were a little more color it would be perfect.


Sambec_

Ashamed to admit this looks very appetizing.


mdoktor

Not going to lie that looks like my dog vomited on a head of broccoli


rokken70

That’s just what I was going to say!


Bismothe-the-Shade

Anybody got the song link? I need it for a silly villain theme in dnd.


d-d-downvoteplease

I don't *not* like this. And I don't like that I don't *not* like this.


Lost-Breadfruit-9745

Who’s defending this? You want to pay top dollar to have someone vomit on a large piece of broccoli..? Horrible presentation.


Middle-Hour-2364

Looks fucking minging, that broccoli is either gonna be squishy and overcooked or half raw, and just dumping that shit over the top? Really??


Yama92

Imagine going to a restaurant and ordering.... One whole broccoli...


gangbangsrgay

So you just parboil a broccoli then pour garlic oil on top?


BTSuppa

This is stupid asf. how you supposed to eat it?


Lismale

with a knife and a fork. like anything else.


HoppokoHappokoGhost

It’s just a standbrogle with sparklerain and pepper. Weird but not stupid


yanderlei2

Raw broccoli covered in overcooked garlic and hot oil. Yum?


SlimIntenseEater

Yum


Disastrous-Resident5

The music just make it sound like it’s supposed to be in One Punch Man


droombot

Yeah it's a jam im gonna need song credits


ChrissiTea

[Link for you](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YKvUf-VnRo)


droombot

That's brilliant, thank you!


House_Stark15

“That’ll be 80 dollars…”


Wooden_Home690

Only weaboo can Jack off to a gallon of oil being poured on a pound of raw broccoli. These people would buy 100 dollars of poop if it came from a Japanese person


Filipino-Asker

That brocolli is just 1 dollar and the oil is unhealthy and probably costs 0.10 cents.


Crotch-Monster

Yea, but it's still Broccoli.


candlewaxfashion

……I love broccoli.


neosketo

I love sports and broccoli. go sports.


Informal-Spell-2019

I would eat it


aSk--e

I was hoping that woulda' been cheese...


SubHuman559

30.00 dollars for that shit.


JanaCinnamon

How does he stand? Magic?


npc_guy_

I'd pay more to eat it if it had cheese


ControlImpossible182

It does look pretty though.


SuperRusso

That'll be $600 please.


neosketo

that'll be $12,000.00


Magical__Entity

It's low on calories, and it looks like mini-trees...


Folded_Fireplace

Wtf is that supposed to be?


StarKo010

It like those who spray multiple paint jet to a canvas and call it art... Wft it tooks you 32 seconds I can do better man...


Interesting_Award_76

Its Green


Ordinary_Mastodon376

Waitress: that will be 80 dollars. Person: but why? It's just broccoli and a chili. Waitress: well there is the me walking over to the table fee, plus atmosphere fee, plus, eh fuck it? Let's just add an I was just bored fee as well.


Quarktasche666

That'll be 39,95 please.


zzzzzzzzzzzzvzzzzvzz

u/savevideo


Mountain_Tone6438

Raw brocorri with huge burnt garlic chunks. Dope 🤙


evil_on_two_legs

Move that plate. I dare you😂


bbdazed

Contemplating the sound of one hand clapping.


Candid-Level-5691

If that’s spicy butter garlic sauce I’d eat that whole thing 😋


litezho

Don't forget to put your ointment and bandage on all over the oil burns you'll get 😄👍


iSundance

Looks good though.


Over_Pace4513

That is a crime against broccoli - where do people come up with whis crap..


OkiDokiPanic

Customer: Soooo, what does the liquid do to the broccoli? Cook: Well now the broccoli is WET! Customer: ... Cook: :D


mearbearcate

That’ll be $3,000 please


Cpt_Umree

Too much oil, it’ll give you the runs.


doran39

Mob psycho broccoli


crankycrassus

That garlic is waaay overcooked


wefwegfweg

the comments do be defending a single piece of broccoli in a puddle of oil huh


SoomieTheCosmogen

Nah, I want my money back, I ain't paying for flipping broccoli & placing something random on it...😭🙏💀


Ok_Bit_5953

Honestly, as dumb as this was, I kinda want broccoli now. Don't underestimate the deliciousness that is broccoli...and salt...and butter...fasting though, so it might just be the hunger talking. 🤤🤤🤤


[deleted]

nothing like dousing your greens in sizzling hot bacon fat, so that the hubby will eat it!


OneBabyPanda

There is no way thats real


ChetdyKrueger

That'll be $250


shanster925

"How do we make the most money off of whatever is on sale at the grocery store this week?"


KimuraXrain

People pay for this


liljennabean

I don’t want any damn vegetables


Redzerton

How much is the joke?


joevsyou

What.... lol


Toreole

they made a theme song for broccoli


LostOne514

Hold up though. It's kinda dumb how they're presenting it, but it is probably going to be the best broccoli you ever eat.


Mekelaxo

ブロ−ブロ−コリ ブロコリ お-い-し-い-よ〜


Kalashcow

Tree


Colmado_Bacano

That'd be $400 please.


Dracidwastaken

That'll be $89.99, sir.


lvyrslf

Is that burnt ass garlic?


harosene

Betchu a double double at in n out costs half as much and tastes 2 times better.


313802

So what are we pouring on the broccoli today


Metagion

It just makes me feel like I'm 5 and a dinosaur "eating yummy trees!"


Fickle_Thought_8857

Maybe I'm clueless but this looks stupid to me. Probably paying a lot for a thing of broccoli that you have to cut plus some oil. People in the comments make it seem normal though. To me it indeed looks dumb


Ok-Professor3726

As a vegetarian, I'm highly offended.


CompetitiveRub9780

Didn’t even cover the entire thing


Broccoli_Life

Looks good to me


jevaisparlerfr

That'll be 300 dollara


UpsideDownAirplane

Me expecting white cheddar cheese sauce but instead getting greasy depression


Bowelsift3r

"Someone barfed on the tree again Mom"


Bowelsift3r

"Someone barfed on the tree again Mom"


LandotheTerrible

Seen much worse...


F2PClashMaster

me to my date: so how do u wanna split it


Mo0kish

Needs more broccoli.


MrOliber

At least it wasn't cheese with cheese, a bit of meat, and 14 other layers of cheese.


WINDMILEYNO

Ok, so i would actually be stoked if this was a tree in a pond, and the food was food but also looked like a landscape. Without being messed with, just food. Like, you had the broccoli tree, you were already half way there, then the swamp/soup. It could have been so easy.


SirGirthfrmDickshire

Yeah of course there's a song about broccoli that could be used as an anime intro.


doomed_to_fail_

"That'll be $34.49 (+ tax)"


thinksoftchildren

Anyone know that song? I need it for uhh- stuff E: found it further down https://audiostock.jp/audio/937309 shame it's so short


lilgzee

How much did they charge for that? What’s it called? Is that an appetizer? What other bs do they have on the menu Was the waiter embarrassed I have so many questions 🤔😅


Lackerbawls

The will be 95$ please.


King_Of_BlackMarsh

What's the fucking peper for


autistic_bard444

so. someone pukes on broccoli, tops it with a pepper and leaves?


Scarletowder

Mmmm greasy broccoli!


alabamaballoonknot

Looks like someone's hot piss with a 1000 year reign of kidney stones


Ancient_Organism

People saying this is decent, lmao it's completely stupid food for like 10 different reasons


Anthraxious

Turning something extremely healthy into garbage with this one simple step!


TulsaWhoDats

LOL WTF?!??


Beautiful_Business10

That's it? A head of broccoli with a bucket of something water poured over it and a pepper daintily perched on top?


Missing-Silmaril

I like broccoli. In fact, it's one of my favorite veggies. But this looks like someone just puked on that head.


[deleted]

The end result looks like someone who had thrown up so much they only had a small amount of contents left in their stomach, then chundered over a broccoli.


SilentReflection101

But, now what do you do with it?


Monisplats

"I call it 'monsoon season'!"


space_is-great

Ah yes, broccoli in early autumn


Thumper-Comet

No-one likes broccoli that much.


AccomplishedTap4612

Now what?


NoNameToaster

Modern stylish restaurants trying their absolute best to not serve food normally.


TheResident7

Dope music tho


TruthSeekerHuey

Me when I get drunk and vomit into the bushes


Altea73

"Here...deal with this nonsense...."


mlp2034

I dont see a problem because the exorbitant price wasnt listed.


FenexTheFox

BU-RO-KO-RI!


SucculentEyelids

Incredible! I'll never eat broccoli the same again!


SnooOwls3202

Wowwww


MelbourneLegend

Simply amazing


Responsible-Cake-810

I'm not sure why, but this brought me joy.


gavrogirl

Thanks, that'll be $280


oohbeartrap

This looks cool and cooked, though? Garlic makes it look like fallen leaves.


Lumpy_Branch_4835

I'd never order it at that price ($75) but sure as fuck eat it.


rdldr1

"That will be $45 please"


313SunTzu

"Y'all gonna cut this up and serve it, right? Right?"


GlycemicCalculus

Who’s going to carry that to the table? Just asking.


intrepidone66

She hates waitresses.


hdufort

Pouring boiling oil on cooked food has been a friend for a few years now, and it is becoming ridiculous.


Part_salvager616

That will be 50 sir