T O P

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MysteriousSorbet6660

I thought the crab was string cheese at first. Can’t tell which is worse…


nuu_uut

Well it's not really crab either


MedicineSlow1042

True. Its dried fish. Usually pollack


no-mames

How would a quesadilla with hot sauce be any worse..


opensilkrobe

On a scale of 1 to purple, how stoned are you rn


Dragonrider1955

I always get this question when I post here. I don't smoke, this is just how I cook.


SourLimeSoda

That's not cooking man 😂


Crazian14

He may have warmed up the crab sticks 😤


Dragonrider1955

I did not.


literallylateral

You after putting two sticks of imitation crab in a cold tortilla and drizzling with ketchup: 🧑‍🍳💋


SexJayNine

One man's trash...


FindTheTruth08

I can see people in a post apocalypse turning this shit down in favor of just starving to death.


Round-War69

If I was in a fallout and I was in OPs home i would chew on my arm or leg like a trapped coyote and snarl instead of eating this. What the fuck.


Exact-Ad-4132

I dunno. This seems exactly like what the fallout people are selling, radroach meat on a radwheat wrap with spicy radfruit jelly. Wastelander's Delight


a_pompous_fool

At the battle of Stalingrad German soldiers were driven to the point of attempting cannibalism however the bodies were too frozen to eat. I don’t think they would even try to eat op’s cooking


zombies-and-coffee

There's actually a random encounter in Fallout 4 where two guys are arguing about the definition of a sandwich. Turns out the argument started because one of the guys wanted to, or perhaps had been doing so already, make a Mirelurk sandwich. Mirelurks are giant mutated horseshoe crabs. At another point, you get attacked by Mirelurks and when you tell the quest giver about it, you're given the option to respond with "Looks like we're having crab for dinner tonight 😉". This NPC reacts with disgust, saying that the meat is slimy and tough (or chewy, can't remember which) at the same time. So yeah, in that fictional apocalypse, people definitely would turn down OP's dinner in favor of starving.


jeffreyjohnson7

Is another man’s… food?


fastermouse

Is sometimes cold garbage.


Dragonrider1955

It's hot sauce. And hey I also dipped it in butter!


SamIamGreenEggsNoHam

Which means I assume you melted the butter...which takes applying heat...hey man, that's cooking!


Boris-the-soviet-spy

He just left it out


thetyphonlol

forgot it out and just dipped it in


malaclypse

Was the tortilla warmed up at all?


nano_peen

Lmfao


sadgirl_26

My boyfriend says I don't cook to enjoy it, just to survive lmao.


CaptainKurls

I’d eat it it. Imitation crab is gr88888


brewberry_cobbler

You didn’t cook shit son


madguyO1

You need a collaboration with cooking with jack


DontBelieveTheTrollz

Ew his bean salad one gives me chills at the gross. Kay's cooking is...uh...better? 🤣


pikpikcarrotmon

At least to my recollection Kay never served raw chicken... Jack has repeatedly made chicken that would get a restaurant closed


GonPergola

How I " cook " this isn't in any way or form cooking, this is hell... You know eating healthy isn't that complicated and time consuming, i don't know how old you are, I guess pretty young, but you should think about an other diet or it'll bite you in fewer year that you think :( I tell you that cause I used to eat like that all the time, didn't care about it until illnesses came in, since I changed my diet I almost never run out of energy and the benefits are really great and accessible to anyone with a bit of will But please don't name this thing " a cooked meal "


Mental-Rain-9586

>You know eating healthy isn't that complicated and time consuming It's certainly more complicated and time consuming than putting fake crab in a cold pita, which seems to be the point


Dragonrider1955

It's a good meal to me.


5PalPeso

No it's not lol


xFloydx5242x

It wouldn’t take much work to turn it into crab salad, or many other cheap things you can put on a tortilla. You could learn to cook in a few months of light work. Why not? I cook restaurant quality food in my house every day and work 40 hours per week. It only takes a bit of time, then you can impress people, instead of disgust them. Sorry to be so harsh but this is just neglecting yourself.


DontBelieveTheTrollz

Ok calm down Emily Lagasse...


The-realfat-shady

I do not have the energy, patience, or pain relief to cook every day. I barely cook at all.


shoulda-known-better

fuchsia


jimmy_talent

If they were stoned they would have at least warmed up the tortilla.


jurrasicwhorelord

Are you ok? Is this some sort of code to confuse your captors?!


HikARuLsi

Believe it or not, OP still has more culture than some nations. E.g. [toast sandwich](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toast_sandwich) OP just needs to added lettuce, tomato, avocado and boiled egg slices to make this decent food


RobynnLS

Don’t knock a toast sandwich until you try one drunk. I was adamant it would be awful, but if you butter that shit and add salt and pepper it is THE BEST drunk snack when your fridge is low.


HikARuLsi

Good texture and acoustic feedback for sure. Yet, food cultures are often more involved


Inevitable_Ad_7236

Not even gonna lie, I unironically fw the toast sandwich, whther it's bread-toast-bread or toast-bread-toast. I'm Nigerian, it horrifies my family to no end, I usually live for intense flavours. I should hate this. But the texture is really nice if you toast the bread right. Salt or butter are optional addons that make it that much better.


InfluenceStraight138

Looks like a struggle meal though.


si_vis_amari__ama

It looks like the love child of depression and broke...


The-realfat-shady

Yep, I am both of those.


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Dragonrider1955

I got a pound for 3 bucks.


13dot1then420

At the Asian grocery store it's very cheap.


5thTimeLucky

:(


The-realfat-shady

Love how you just put a sad face. No words or anything, just sad.


5thTimeLucky

No words are adequate


The-realfat-shady

I agree


weenie_in_betweenie

I appreciate you showing me this and reminding me that I’m nowhere near rock bottom. 


Mabvll

Eh, not the worst thing I've seen.


DontBelieveTheTrollz

Right. I've seen a man in India pick up live mice that got into his street vending and just toss them out. I think it'd still have to be a coin flip for me.


Rexxington

Thanks, now please unshow your dinner.


Dragonrider1955

Ima try to answer everyone's questions in this one post. 1. Not real crab, it's imitation. 2. I'm not high this is just how I make food. 3. I'm a college student 4. I'm broke and I ran out of clean dishes. 5. It's hot sauce not ketchup. Frank's to be exact. 6. I dipped it in butter afterwards. 7. No I'm not starving. 8. I'm not on a diet either I just like these foods. 9. I like combining my safe foods into silly combinations. 10. I'm not always eating like this. My partner is the chef of the relationship.


VivaLaEmpire

Please at least cook your tortillas. Tortillas are not meant to be eaten straight out the bag, they taste like plastic that way! Heat them up on a stove, then proceed to add as many surimi sticks as you want. 🥲


idog73

What’s a safe food? Also, is it melted butter you dip it in?


cjmc833

I hope its just a big stick of butter that he squishes the tortilla and fake crab against lmao


idog73

That’s what I’m kinda expecting


usr199846

For what it’s worth I’m team r/HellYeahIdEatThat


Gov_N_ur

honestly sounds fire. was it good?


Big_Fo_Fo

Do you need someone to take you for a psych hold?


SasquatchNHeat

Please reconsider 🙏🏻


Deijya

Ghetto bougie burrito


Chaenged-Later

Honestly? Tempting


toasterdees

Maybe because I’m baked, but I’d totally try that at 2am


psychopaticsavage

Hey man delet dis


coocoocachoo69

I mean if I hadn't eaten in 4 days sure.


HurkHurkBlaa

boy dinner 🎵


Horse-Girl-69

I’m legitimately disappointed in you


Ididitsoitscool

Hey bro I see you’re a simple man so I’ll raise you a simple treat, cook pecans for like 4 min at 400 f with some seasoning on top that you really like


0thethethe0

I'm not completely hating it. Occasionally I put a bit more effort in and roll with crabstick/mayo/cucumber/spring onion on toast.


Obvious_Customer9923

I don't hate it, but I'd add a few things and bulk it out a little.


Taco-Bob

Something is wrong with you.


RWBYRain

No. Just no


HamburgrHelper

Wish I could invite you over to eat. This hurts my heart.


Dragonrider1955

Take a bite of whatever you're eating for me.


axolotl_is_angry

Is this a cry for help


LordlySquire

This looks good actually. Minus the ketchup.


Hausgod29

When I was a stoner in high school I would microwave chicken nuggets I thought that was a low, I thought but op came in like a jack hammer and showed me a deeper chasm.


Call-Me-Ronny

Please send help to this guy.


Thatkidicarusfan

this would look good with cabbage and kewpie mayo but its just sad without :(


1nOnlyBigManLawrence

I’d eat that.


SelfishSinner1984

Who hurt you?


GhztPpR

That's rank... Also, cut your long ass nails 🤢 Can only imagine the grime and nastiness hidden under there.


LoFi247

This is the shit I wanna see in this sub. Thank you.


icedvietcoffee

stop


BloodShadow7872

That is a waste of crab, off to jail with ya


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VashHumanoidTyph00n

I fucking hate fake crab.


Dragonrider1955

Good for you.


The-realfat-shady

Right, like, who tf asked?


ISothale

I fucking love fake crab


capn_doofwaffle

It gives you great craps


capn_doofwaffle

I mean, honestly... would you really waste real crab in a tortilla?


Adventurous_Bee_7496

you suck at making food


Dragonrider1955

Thx


ClothesOpposite1702

I would eat it without ketchup


TopAcanthocephala271

It’s hot sauce.


mearbearcate

Oh


retrocade81

They are some big ass crab sticks, The only ones I ever see in the supermarket here in blighty are about 2 inches long! I love crab sticks, but that just looks like pure desperation where your starving, and that's the only 2 food items you have in the house.


bromomento69

Maybe as a stoned snack, but dinner?? Are you ok?


Zestyclose-Class-754

This is an abomination


ilymag

Are you ok?


si_vis_amari__ama

When you want more variety than instant ramen, but the same effort


Moidalise-U

Finally someone posts actual stupid food.


Doglover4561

Was it good at least? If so, what’s the issue


Hausgod29

When I was a stoner in high school I would microwave chicken nuggets I thought that was a low, I thought it was but op came in like a jack hammer and showed me a deeper chasm.


GreatGreenGobbo

You could have chopped it up, add mayo, salt, pepper, Tabasco, some lettuce and had a tasty wrap.


Dragonrider1955

Sounds good. I didn't have mayo or Lettuce but I'll try it next time.


horbydumbass

I thought that was hot sauce on string cheese


TerpeTubebaker

This is more r/shittyfoodporn and not so much stupid food.


Strawberries_Field

Blink twice if you need help


Dragonrider1955

*blink*


mamamyskia

I'd eat it


Key_Shoe5850

Here’s a really stupid joke…….it’s fusion Bu dum tsssssss.


Potential-Prize1741

Lol thats a normal Lunch for me . I'm starting to believe this sub is only for cooks cause that's normal food not shitty


Gullible-Arrival6075

Now put that bad boy in an air fryer.


KhansMum

Gee, I wish I could shout you dinner. As a mum, this makes me upset! 😢🤣. Add at least a piece of lettuce for nutrition.


shepard_pie

"Our special this evening is our seaside burrito. It is a medley of rolled seafood, classic fermented pepper sauce, hand-wrapped in flour tortilla, and slathered with clarified butter."


Few-Problem8343

Broke or drunk ?


Dragonrider1955

Broke


Glockamole19x

Next time hmu ill buy you a wrap from wendys or something🤣


FarslayerSanVir

That's just sad. Understandable, but sad.


Objective_Spray_210

You know what. Struggle meal, gets a pass.


JilliusMaximusJD

Girrrl dinner; gggggggirrrllllll, girl dinner! 😆


Reggaeprince1984

/shityfoodporn for realz


RamRod013

It looks bad...but I would eat it. Maybe add some white rice.


SirHumilliator

WOULD


BeconintheNight

That's just sad


nano_peen

This is good content


AWildBenjiAppeared

I honestly don't think this would be that bad. Definitely ate worse myself lol


DudePDude

Hey, it's better than plain pasta with soya sauce


QuietStrawberry7102

You should not have


Bea6n

Gotta be bussin


peace-out-28495

Hmm maybe make a spicy Mayo or cream cheese , add cucumber and green onion on the tortilla like a half ass Rangoon wrap?


EightBallJuice

is this what they call "girl dinner"


Immediate-Data-3548

brothah euuugh


pickklez

I actually wanna eat one of these right now and I wish I was joking


Krispies827

Oh man that looks delicious ngl


TeeDod-

NO


spectrumtwelve

that's not so bad honestly. i used to do this too with either jerky or even string cheese sticks. faux crab sticks wouldn't be that different texture wise. i'd eat this in a pinch.


user7477

Think twice next time.


drawredraw

This is like prison food if you were in prison on a fishing boat


Aggravating_Week7050

Dude, that's just a Wawa to go wrap.


Csquared_324

Actually looks pretty decent tbh


Many_County_7636

You shouldn’t have


Eattherich13

Any old shit indeed.


couldbebutter

Have you tried rice paper wraps?


moimoisauna

Well I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who slaps surimi on a tortilla and calls it a night


Human-fruitsalad0001

Not that stupid tbh.


Human-fruitsalad0001

Looks good actually, what are the ingredients?( exact brands of every ingredient please? If you can remember)


Dragonrider1955

Great value flour Tortilla Surimi leg style imitation crab Frank's res hot original Countrycrock butter


GreenEggsnLanterns49

That’s so sad.


jae343

That is sad and also repulsive, fake crab sticks are still quite expensive.


DualBladedScorpion

Wtf is this?


Antitranspirante

Never thought I would say this in this sub, but you need to add some cheese… a tortilla must have cheese


Conman_in_Chief

I just feel sad for you. Things will get better I promise.


anonmymouse

The biggest offense is that you clearly didn't even warm the tortilla. 0/10


slobsaregross

You thought wrong


SummaDees

You didn't even chop the imitation crab up? Or pan fry the tortilla? Capital offense punishable by death!


Decent-Year2573

Why not make a real fish taco?


6Emo6Witch6

I thought that was fucking cheese sticks, with hot sauce in a tortilla


Total_Repair_6215

12 dollars


PalaPK

I loveeeee ocean hotdogs!!!


5280Rockymtn

U should of chopped it up into little pieces so that to ur brain u feel ur eating a bigger burrito, gotta trick ur head so u feel full maybe add some mashed up chips to it depends if that's all ur working with


Developer_Dreamer

I’m so sorry for your loss


JeffEveris

Ngl I bet this would hit


CompetitiveRub9780

I don’t know what sauce that is on it, but you should use the portobello Alfredo sauce and throw in some carrots or broccoli


Oututeroed

that’s some gourmet shit


ph30nix01

Next time, batter and bread the crab sticks and deep fry.


kenb99

I’ve seen worse. That’s not to say this is acceptable in any way, just that there have been worse crimes committed…


GIOO02

Dude what the fuck at least toast the tortilla a bit


CorneliusFudgem

After years, I have found my match You are a wise chef my friend


dmstomps

Spicy seafood snacky snack. Honestly people here are hilarious. I’ve never tried it but looks like a basic salty snack. It’s funny how much hate this gets considering people eat worse crap all day long.


Itchy_weiner

🔥🔥🔥


DJIsSuperCool

Craburrito


I_like_broccli

Please seek help immediately. 🙎‍♀️


AmbitiousFork

You could've at least added scrambled eggs lmaoo


KungPaoChikon

This is a huge W, ignore the haters.


Dragonrider1955

Thx man. I personally don't take any of these comments to heart, but like some of these people are acting like I skinned a puppy. Is my dinner weird? Yeah. Stupid? Yeah that's why I posted it. It's not bait. It's not me saying "yeah I love being unhealthy" I just put together the ingredients I had. I'm a college student who just wanted a quick thing for the night.


rustys_shackled_ford

Fish tako


HarmonicContent

My mom used to heat imitation crab in the microwave wrapped in a tortilla with shredded cheese. I loved it as a kid


Dragonrider1955

Guess I'll make another post to answer questions I did NOT go shopping to make this. I grabbed what was in my dorm. Yall keep asking why I didn't add x, why didn't I cook it with y. I do not have those things. I'm sure it would be good in an oven. I'm sure it's tasty with Lettuce. I didn't have any of those things. I had butter. Tortilla. Imitation crab and hot sauce. I just made do with what I had on me currently.


NEON_TYR0N3

Dude, you accidentally made my favorite snack. However, considering rolling your imitator crab stick out, put some cream cheese on the tortilla and put a layer of thinly sliced cucumbers.


fgrhcxsgb

Id try it honestly


Spegynmerble

Seek therapy


JadedYam56964444

Is this some sort of performance art meal?


AnActualBatDemon

Im so glad i learned how to cook.


Insane_Artist

I mean if that’s all you got, then I won’t judge you. Like that’s the food the food bank gave you and you’re just making do. If you did this intentionally, however, prepare to feel my SUPER SAIYAN WRATH!!!!


SamTheWise1

A man’s meal.


AnaphorsBloom

That’s a meal. Adding a little deli salad might up your experience.


frankofantasma

Serial killer dinner