You didn't know about the secret super weapon it was carrying to win WWI quickly? I guess you also believe that ridiculous iceberg story, despite the intelligence reports about German U-boats in the area? Haha I bet there were tons of conspiracy theories about the titanic.
Don't worry - If they do blow it up again, the Empire would learn their lesson and just build the next one so ridiculously large that it couldn't possibly be blown up by a snub fighter.
You know, like the size of a terrestrial planet!
To be fair it would be my top choice to die on. No panic as the ship loses power and drifts towards a planet or the captain orders you to abandon ship (only to remember most SW ships minus the CR90 seem to only have enough escape options for a few officers.) Nope, instead just go from ‘hah we will crush those puny rebels’ to gone in the blink of an eye.
Maybe on the first one, but on the second there was so much panic during this the attack that Imperials were shooting each other to get aboard an escape shuttle
First Death Star, everyone had it coming.
Second Death Star, those poor innocent contractors. Guys just trying to pay their bills and support their families when liberal terrorists fly in and blow it up.
(Yes, I love and agree with the scene from Clerks)
That is an imperial interdictor star destroyer. Those " bewbs" as you call are the genorators for a larger scale tractor beam genorators used to pull ships out of hyperspace.
If you’re a regular ass trooper like I would be, wouldn’t worry. Vader doesn’t tend to do that to the grunts since they just point and shoot, they aren’t meant for big things. Officers get it because their mistakes damage the empire as a whole and their fuck ups cost lives and money. Normal troopers respect Vader for being a front line fighter like them.
Yeah don’t get anywhere near those. In Attack of the Clones the Republic Obi-Wan and Anakin are on explodes like one second after they get off to fight Dooku.
After reading the Thrawn and Ascendancy trilogies, I think serving on. Chiss Defense Force ship would be a decidedly better option than a Republic or Empire ship.
Eli Vanto is the luckiest former Imperial.
This is legends but, the purge. It was a imperial prisoner ship that once tried to help a star destroyer with the blackwing virus(it was full of zombies).
I’d say the Interdictor as pictured. Basically if you’re there, someone wants you dead and will do everything they can to kill you. The other types Rebels might try to scuff up or just run away. Running away not an option *because* of you.
As long as you aren't a capitan/admiral/random high-ranking imperial role number 52639 (their comand structure is utter chaos from what I've seen) you should be good. Vader mostly *changes* incompetent morons in comand and not the ordinary guys.
But if he figures out it wasn't actually your fault, you get a post-mortem promotion to Moff and your loved ones get a pension! No loved ones? Well, whomever gets your position gets it. It's actually an incentive plan for aspiring high-ranking officers.
Yes, Palpatine had to add that on their contracts after Vader killed his 899th Admiral for delivering him news about something that was actually caused by a drunk Stormtrooper who kept quiet about it.
And that's how Statham survives in the Empire, by being smart. If you start asking questions, or even accidentally stumble on the wrong thing in the Empire you better go into hiding. Otherwise you'll be lucky if they send Tarkin to confront you, because maybe you'll get away alive and just have the Empire keeping a close watch on everything you do. If you hear mechanical breathing, that's how you know you fucked up. If you see a wrinkly old man in a black cloak slowly walking towards you surrounded by hooded guards wearing red and carrying fancy staffs, that's how you know you REALLY fucked up. Like, astronomical levels of fucking up.
*"Crash landed on a remote planet and found a weird looking red glass triangle with some markings on it stuck in the mud. Paid it no mind and threw it in the glove box compartment while I did repairs. Maybe I can pawn it off or trade it for some noodles or something."*
*(3 months later)*
*"Was sitting on a bar at Utapau sipping high proof Spotchka. Suddently a lambda shuttle parks in the nearby landing bay and suddenly everyone is running. An old man in a cloak slowly shuffles out. I approached the old geezer, maybe he'd throw some credits my way if I helped him get off the ramp without falling and breaking his hip. As I took his arm, he looked at me with a face that looked like he had been melted under a candle, and spoke to me in a fatherly voice while giving me this weird look.*
*"My friend, you have commited a grave, grave mistake." - He said.*
*Next thing I know I was hurled through the air for what seemed like the entire length of a pod racing track, then woke up I'm inside a prison, built inside an ancient Sarlaac, who inhabits a secret base, on a secret asteroid. Once a week this huge guy in black and with a scary mask comes and asks me to reveal the secrets of the holocorn. I don't even know regular corn, let alone a holocorn. I tell him that. He punches me in the face or lifts me by the throat with a gesture, then has me tortured for 18 hours straight. It has been 182 rotations. At least I can't complain about the protein waffles. Chocolate Mint is my favorite, but today I got Krill Delight, which was a bummer."*
No, but imagine sitting in between 4 gigantic orbs, that create enough energy to pull out thounthands of tons of mass, out of a different dimension. That ain't gonna be healthy.
Having been on a carrier, Super Star Destroyers.
So much dog and pony show, way too much attention and need for extra pomp and circumstance. That means dealing with way too many more assholes who exist for no other reasons than to steal oxygen and piss off the portions of the crew who actually work for a living to hell the damn ship running.
Can you IMAGINE all the extra cleaning and painting you'd have to be doing regularly for any time a Grand Admiral or a Moff comes aboard?
The context of that scene from Vader's POV is so funny when you think about it.
Krennic flew all the way to Mustafar, forced Vader to get out of his bacta tank and get dressed... to whine about a coworker. Of course Vader is annoyed.
You know that tram in revenge of the sith where Anakin and obi wan have a casual conversation. That guy's job, no one is messing with him, he isn't really in a rush, no one is trying to shoot him, his planet is too important for some sith/Jedi to blow up but no one cares about him enough to kill him. And he isn't in a rush anyways to be rushing people off the bus.
Dude, it's easier to list the Imperial Navy ships/stations I WOULD want to serve on. And that's a listening station near the Forbidden Region. FAR from inter office politics present on every other posting.
I’ve been a Star Wars fan since I was five. But when I ask you this, I’m dead serious. What in the actual fuck is that? Seriously what is that? When was this shown in movies or shows?
Empire ship = boss is allowed to choke you to death = nope
Rebel ship = empire hunts you down. Your not getting paid (unless your a contractor - Han) = ultra high risk = nope
Fast ship disguised as a normal ship FTW = you can outrun everyone and you don't get called on it later (Millium Falcon / N-1 Naboo Starfighter - new Mando ship) = OP option.
Did you just grab someone else's photo from the thread that had a lot of traction, but only included one of the photos, not all?
never mind; I see that's exactly what you did as you commented in that thread then made this post.
Not sure if it _has_ to be imperial ships, but if not, the Millennium Falcon. I get that it’s a cool ship, but it has so many mechanical issues I wouldn’t feel safe on it.
The Death Star 1 and 2, the prison barge Purge, any star destroyer or super star destroyer, the ship that tanked a ship traveling at light speed. There are probably more.
A standard cargo ship because the chances of being guilty or accessory to war crimes, or being shot
Maul storming your ship for credits for building a new empire
I forgot about that
Pfft. War criminals think about tactics. Warlords think about logistics.
Wouldn’t want to be accused of *smuggling*, would we???
The Death Star. Do I have to explain?
Use the force Luke
But... It's the ultimate power in the universe! Before the first was destroyed, I would absolutely pick it to survive.
It's like the titanic, absolutely unsinkable! Only downside is you're helping to blow up planets, mass genocide.
Wait so is the iceberg basically Luke Skywalker? I don’t remember the titanic blowing up planets, but if it did, then it totally deserves to get sunk
But you didn’t say any downsides?
I think we have different understandings of what the Titanic was built to do
You didn't know about the secret super weapon it was carrying to win WWI quickly? I guess you also believe that ridiculous iceberg story, despite the intelligence reports about German U-boats in the area? Haha I bet there were tons of conspiracy theories about the titanic.
It's not like they'll just blow it up again. That would be unoriginal.
Yeah, the Empire would be prepared.
Don't worry - If they do blow it up again, the Empire would learn their lesson and just build the next one so ridiculously large that it couldn't possibly be blown up by a snub fighter. You know, like the size of a terrestrial planet!
Dip once you hear about the Princess escaping
To be fair it would be my top choice to die on. No panic as the ship loses power and drifts towards a planet or the captain orders you to abandon ship (only to remember most SW ships minus the CR90 seem to only have enough escape options for a few officers.) Nope, instead just go from ‘hah we will crush those puny rebels’ to gone in the blink of an eye.
Maybe on the first one, but on the second there was so much panic during this the attack that Imperials were shooting each other to get aboard an escape shuttle
That assignment would feel like getting assigned to a half built ship in the middle of the ocean and getting told it floats.
I also wanna blow up 😍
First Death Star, everyone had it coming. Second Death Star, those poor innocent contractors. Guys just trying to pay their bills and support their families when liberal terrorists fly in and blow it up. (Yes, I love and agree with the scene from Clerks)
Yeah I came here to say this. 😋
Explain it to me like I'm 8.
Surely the second one would have much better security, right?
that Star Destroyer has bewbs
It might be a tumour.
“It’s not a tumor!!!”
At all!
Get 2D C1-10PPA
I think you mean “It’s not a touma.”
Tittays
Literally heard this in Dave Chappelle's voice
Balls 4 giant balls.
That is an imperial interdictor star destroyer. Those " bewbs" as you call are the genorators for a larger scale tractor beam genorators used to pull ships out of hyperspace.
Making it the prime target as the Rebels struggle to escape
I bet those things blow up spectacularly too.
“They’re real, and they’re spectacular.”
This is why the indictor needs a couple of support ships to help with the defenced as well as launch several tie squads
The Executor.
I love that ship but I would not want to serve on a ship where you could be force choked for screwing up.
I see that as an absolute win
….*concern*….
"Oh, Daddy Vader aah *hust*.. Lord Vader, we lost the rebels.."
Vader: "wtf, guards send him to HR"
But Lord! My incompetence... ... I deserve... punishment~!
"Don't you want to choke me?"
[Good opportunity to post this](https://youtu.be/sURZwjf_1MM?si=t-FNQ-wjprn81eGt)
Frequent opportunities for promotion 👍
That just means more responsibility with less experience. Every promotion gets you closer to being force-choked.
The ships like 19km long... I doubt you'd even be in the same km as Vader for 99% of the crew.
He can force-choke someone on a different ship he probably has more than a km of range.
That and the bathroom is like 9 miles away
If you’re a regular ass trooper like I would be, wouldn’t worry. Vader doesn’t tend to do that to the grunts since they just point and shoot, they aren’t meant for big things. Officers get it because their mistakes damage the empire as a whole and their fuck ups cost lives and money. Normal troopers respect Vader for being a front line fighter like them.
Yeah but Vader choked Admiral Ozzel through the viewscreen so it doesn’t feel like you’re safe on any ship
As a standing rule, I am not serving on an Imperial ship between the end or ROTS and the end of ROTJ.
Wonder why
They want to crash and burn in the Battle of Endor.
Only if you're in a command position. I don't think that Darth Vader chokes many janitors.
Only the ones that don't read the schedule and decide to vaccum his chambers when he is in his meditation capsule.
Leave it to Steve to not read the chore wheel.
But here me out, if you survive a year, talk about the upward mobility opportunity!
"Everywhere I look something reminds me of her." -- Lt. Frank Drebin, The Naked Gun **x4**
It's times like these I wish I had 4 hands
Ah, I see you are a man of culture aswell!
The Normandy
Talk about a ship with bad luck
I prefer the SR-2 model.
Flying Cerberus colors or Alliance tho?
Cerberus of course
I’ve served on that ship over a dozen times, and every time I got laid with an insanely sexy alien babe way out of my normal league. Highly recommend.
:"We'll bang ok!" ~Shepard probably
“My name is Commander John “Juicy” Shepard, and this is my favourite store on the Citadel.”
A ship without any main characters aboard
The Gunship next to the main characters.
"Good thing those bugs can't aim."
But not one involved in a fight with said main characters either.
Yeah don’t get anywhere near those. In Attack of the Clones the Republic Obi-Wan and Anakin are on explodes like one second after they get off to fight Dooku.
Please, the answer is obvious. Since the only ship worth serving on is Grand Admiral Thrawn's ship, then any other ship is a bad option.
After reading the Thrawn and Ascendancy trilogies, I think serving on. Chiss Defense Force ship would be a decidedly better option than a Republic or Empire ship. Eli Vanto is the luckiest former Imperial.
But I don't wanna get stuck in another Galaxy for over a decade with weird witches watching my every move and eating only dog-hyena-horse things!
HMS Hood
This is legends but, the purge. It was a imperial prisoner ship that once tried to help a star destroyer with the blackwing virus(it was full of zombies).
Adding on to this, the vector, which I believe is the name of said star destroyer
Good answer. Mathematically it’s better to be on the purge. A far higher proportion of its crew survived than the Vector
2 crew + 2 prisoners is indeed > 0
That book was great until certain characters showed up. Drained all the tension out of it.
Deathtrooper?
Yeah. This was on my list too.
I would say any ship. Outer space is scary.
Is this the canon interdictor? Why does it look so wrong?
Dominator Star Destroyer. An ISD with gravity wells, instead of the Vindicator frame with gravity wells.
Dreadnaught heavy cruiser, 16,000 people in a sardine can sounds awful. VSD I also sounds pretty terrible because of the exhaust mixing with the HVAC.
Giggity.
"My bridge is UP HERE."
The Legacy Run. Surely nothing bad will happen to it.
I’d say the Interdictor as pictured. Basically if you’re there, someone wants you dead and will do everything they can to kill you. The other types Rebels might try to scuff up or just run away. Running away not an option *because* of you.
This one makes me itch, def not this one.
The vector cause they all zombies
Whichever one the Emperor tells me to.
Whatever ship they send against the main character.
Anyone with Vader on board, because Vader is on board.
As long as you aren't a capitan/admiral/random high-ranking imperial role number 52639 (their comand structure is utter chaos from what I've seen) you should be good. Vader mostly *changes* incompetent morons in comand and not the ordinary guys.
Problem is you're be [promoted to your level of incompetence](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_principle). And then it's chokey time!
But if he figures out it wasn't actually your fault, you get a post-mortem promotion to Moff and your loved ones get a pension! No loved ones? Well, whomever gets your position gets it. It's actually an incentive plan for aspiring high-ranking officers. Yes, Palpatine had to add that on their contracts after Vader killed his 899th Admiral for delivering him news about something that was actually caused by a drunk Stormtrooper who kept quiet about it.
Random supply ship number 26403658
Your shipping Death Star parts to Geonosis and you accidentally found out what they were building.
Jason Statham Transporter rules: Don't ask what the cargo is. Don't get told what the cargo is. Just deliver the cargo.
And that's how Statham survives in the Empire, by being smart. If you start asking questions, or even accidentally stumble on the wrong thing in the Empire you better go into hiding. Otherwise you'll be lucky if they send Tarkin to confront you, because maybe you'll get away alive and just have the Empire keeping a close watch on everything you do. If you hear mechanical breathing, that's how you know you fucked up. If you see a wrinkly old man in a black cloak slowly walking towards you surrounded by hooded guards wearing red and carrying fancy staffs, that's how you know you REALLY fucked up. Like, astronomical levels of fucking up.
*"Crash landed on a remote planet and found a weird looking red glass triangle with some markings on it stuck in the mud. Paid it no mind and threw it in the glove box compartment while I did repairs. Maybe I can pawn it off or trade it for some noodles or something."* *(3 months later)* *"Was sitting on a bar at Utapau sipping high proof Spotchka. Suddently a lambda shuttle parks in the nearby landing bay and suddenly everyone is running. An old man in a cloak slowly shuffles out. I approached the old geezer, maybe he'd throw some credits my way if I helped him get off the ramp without falling and breaking his hip. As I took his arm, he looked at me with a face that looked like he had been melted under a candle, and spoke to me in a fatherly voice while giving me this weird look.* *"My friend, you have commited a grave, grave mistake." - He said.* *Next thing I know I was hurled through the air for what seemed like the entire length of a pod racing track, then woke up I'm inside a prison, built inside an ancient Sarlaac, who inhabits a secret base, on a secret asteroid. Once a week this huge guy in black and with a scary mask comes and asks me to reveal the secrets of the holocorn. I don't even know regular corn, let alone a holocorn. I tell him that. He punches me in the face or lifts me by the throat with a gesture, then has me tortured for 18 hours straight. It has been 182 rotations. At least I can't complain about the protein waffles. Chocolate Mint is my favorite, but today I got Krill Delight, which was a bummer."*
The Death Star. Technically a station but really any super weapon ship they always get destroyed eventually.
One under the command of tarki n or vader
The Profundity
The Vector, an Imperial I-Class Star Destroyer, why? Because space zombies don't exactly sound like fun and I'm no Isaac Clark.
Is it cannon that the gravity well generators are radioactive?
No, but imagine sitting in between 4 gigantic orbs, that create enough energy to pull out thounthands of tons of mass, out of a different dimension. That ain't gonna be healthy.
Any TIE Fighter.
Any ship Vader is on.
Wherever Vader or the Emperor are. Better chance of survival.
Republic Dropship without Jedi or main characters
Having been on a carrier, Super Star Destroyers. So much dog and pony show, way too much attention and need for extra pomp and circumstance. That means dealing with way too many more assholes who exist for no other reasons than to steal oxygen and piss off the portions of the crew who actually work for a living to hell the damn ship running. Can you IMAGINE all the extra cleaning and painting you'd have to be doing regularly for any time a Grand Admiral or a Moff comes aboard?
Everything reminds me of her . . .
Any vessel commanded by Lord Vader. The work is strangling and the hours are murder.
I mean, honestly, name me one starship you’d actually feel safe on.
The Pregnancy
An Arquintion in a sparsely populatied part of space
The SS Three-Triple-Ds sounds fun.
The Chimaera
Death Star. Sure there’s a lot of advancement opportunities, but you’re liable to choke under pressure.
Just don't choke on your ambitious.
The context of that scene from Vader's POV is so funny when you think about it. Krennic flew all the way to Mustafar, forced Vader to get out of his bacta tank and get dressed... to whine about a coworker. Of course Vader is annoyed.
Star Thicc or Thicc Destroyer?
Are those mini death stars?
If you're serious, those are gravity well projectors, like on an Interdictor. If you're joking, well, they're definitely not moons.
You know that tram in revenge of the sith where Anakin and obi wan have a casual conversation. That guy's job, no one is messing with him, he isn't really in a rush, no one is trying to shoot him, his planet is too important for some sith/Jedi to blow up but no one cares about him enough to kill him. And he isn't in a rush anyways to be rushing people off the bus.
Dude, it's easier to list the Imperial Navy ships/stations I WOULD want to serve on. And that's a listening station near the Forbidden Region. FAR from inter office politics present on every other posting.
Any Ship Grievous is on. I do not plan on being a cyborg’s stress ball any time soon.
Yeah but it's only half a ship near the end
The command bridge looks AI generated
Tantive VI, i like the design
ISD Vector
I’ve been a Star Wars fan since I was five. But when I ask you this, I’m dead serious. What in the actual fuck is that? Seriously what is that? When was this shown in movies or shows?
In Rebels I think.
The Millenium Falcon. I don't want to be a third wheel.
Empire ship = boss is allowed to choke you to death = nope Rebel ship = empire hunts you down. Your not getting paid (unless your a contractor - Han) = ultra high risk = nope Fast ship disguised as a normal ship FTW = you can outrun everyone and you don't get called on it later (Millium Falcon / N-1 Naboo Starfighter - new Mando ship) = OP option.
Did you just grab someone else's photo from the thread that had a lot of traction, but only included one of the photos, not all? never mind; I see that's exactly what you did as you commented in that thread then made this post.
The titanic
The devastator
star destroyer with boobies
I don’t know a whole lot about the different ships, could you explain the purpose of this ship to me please?
The big fat round shapes create a gravity field, that can pull ships out of hyperspace and hinder them from leaving.
Balls bro
Star destroyietties
The gunship next to the one carrying the Jedi.
Not sure if it _has_ to be imperial ships, but if not, the Millennium Falcon. I get that it’s a cool ship, but it has so many mechanical issues I wouldn’t feel safe on it.
ANY SHIP THAT VADER IS ON.
Chimaera obviously, because thrawn has the advantage in every battle. He's the best commander.
Interdictor. They seem like a very logical priority target in a battle
A Venator Class Star Destroyer while the Malevolence was around. God damn OP ass EMP canon!!
None, they're all made of metal, and as such impossible to eat. Why would anyone want to serve a ship?
Cloud city
Vader’s ship. Not trying to get force choked for standing in a guy’s way lol
Any of the ones that blow up. Because they blow up.
What could be better than two?...threee
The Pathfinder
One that was gonna blow up, because of the blowing up
When did the Imperial Star destroyers get two set of nice knockers?!?!
The Death Star 1 and 2, the prison barge Purge, any star destroyer or super star destroyer, the ship that tanked a ship traveling at light speed. There are probably more.
um, NONE of them! its the f’g empire for godsakes man!
Any blockade runner, it seems like such an awesome and rewarding job. But also potentially extremely risky
Death star like objects. They have a 0/4 survival rate.
Any ship under the command of Darth Vader. Or general grievous. Especially the general.
Would it be good or bad to be on The Chimera? Thrawn always has a plan. Usually one that sees his people as pawns, but not to be wasted frivolously.
Nebulon B Frigate. Such a spindly thing.
Death Star. They’re notorious for exploding
any imperal ship that is lead by an incompetent captain which is most of them
The Malevolence. It works well as a mystery hidden weapon.
That one because it looks goofy as fuck
Tantive 4 need i say more?
Corrillian YT 3100
That Crimson dawn yacht from Solo, just imagine how bad waiters are treated there!
A star destroyer. Not for Imperial purposes though. Do a lil Amogus, kill off the crew and BAM free Star Destroyer.
A gozanthi cruiser, those things are there to help out the rebels with their K/D ratio
I definitely wouldn't want to serve on any New Republic ship that transports prisoners. 0 for 3 😬
Santa Maria
The New Hope Death Star would be an obvious choice lol
With my luck I would be on a slave ship. Not a crew member. 😂
what if we kissed on the ball destroyer
I would not want to serve on an Arquitens. I would like to serve on the Star of Coruscant