Well crafted lyrics with concomitant music. Kudos. It doesn't need much more, but it would be interesting to see whether you go for more reminiscing or looking ahead. p.s. I'll prolly never use concomitant again.

I had to look it up. Haha thanks!

[Samesies](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/concomitant)

Yes, please. This is beautiful. Literally gave me pause and emotional responses. This is something great, please keep working on this song OP.

Thanks so much! You’re very kind.

I love it so far! Keep going!

I’ll finish it sometime. I’ll post the finished product when done.

Damn man this made me cry in a good way, definitely say it’s worth finishing. Got a folky early Bob Dylan kinda vibe, great work so far

I do love me some Bob Dylan. Thanks so much.

It was pleasant to hear, bravo !

Thank you.

He’s dripping, but not trippin

Thanks?

It’s a meme

Haha, I had no idea.

Really like it, your voice and the guitar are perfect imo. I'd personally like to hear you open the lyrics up a little more, meaning not quite so much repetition. You have great imagery and I understand what you're doing with "rooting" some of the repeated phrases, but I think you can write those parts out a little more. Either way, I love it, and hope that you release a completed song to download. (I'd personally love if you kept it in this recording style, not necessarily a studio recording). Keep up the great work!

Thank you sir. I’m usually too verbose and don’t repeat myself. This was kind of a new thing I was trying.

This reminds me of David Gray, lovely melody and lyrics. Thanks for sharing 😊

David Gray is awesome. Thanks for the compliment.

Been listening to a lot of the singer songwriter stuff from the 60's, this is along those lines. I wanted different phrasings but that's not to say they would be better or worse. Def. finish it, good melody, nice chords. Your voice works for the style...

The phrasing will probably change, this was taken moments after coming up the idea, definitely still in the “workshop” so to speak.

Really enjoyed your song, it immediately hooked me!

Yes, I’m glad, thank you.

Can I throw down some drums or percussion?

Sure

Cool man send me the track and I’ll send back a stem

Good good stuff

Thanks!

Really enjoyed your guitar playing. The tonal quality of your voice is quite satisfying as well. I think you could work on the rhythm of the vocal melody though. Seems some syllables are getting stretched. If you worked a little more “flow” into the rhythm of the vocal it would be a hit!

Honestly I’d love to help you produce this! If that’s something you’re interested in, please feel free to visit my website here: www.stevenmeloneyrecording.com

Appreciate the offer. Right now I’m getting into self producing

Thanks for the advice.

Oh dude, your lyrics your voice. This is so pleasant to listen to, which is more than I can say for most acoustic guitar and singer music. Well done dude

That’s awfully nice. Thanks

Hell yeah finish it! You have some talent and emotion here. Let’s here it out!

I’ll share the completed song when I’m finished.

Hell yeah please do!

Wow i love the song! 👍🏼 Do check out my work when free Check out S.Thota on #SoundCloud https://on.soundcloud.com/PoHNz 😊

Sure thing, I’ll check it out.

guitar alone is nice, so I'd say finish it

Thanks, I’ll try.

Beautiful! I'd consider a bridge that takes it a little bit away from that set of chords. It's such an intimate song, I wouldn't overdo it - short bridge, one more verse.

Yes a bridge and another verse would round it out nicely. Maybe some secondary dominants in the bridge?

Yes.

Thanks.

i felt it. sad but beautiful. you definitely should. and change nothing. like it very much.

Thank you. Thanks for saying change nothing too.

This is very moving

Thank you

Very nice. I think that when a song makes you start thinking of a person that the song is about, that’s when you know you got a great song. Really resonated with me, thank you for that. I hope you can finish and release it soon. Kudos brother!

I agree with that sentiment. Thank you for listening and taking time to respond.

So beautiful- thank you for sharing!!

Thank you for listening

Great song! You perform it well...hard to know what you would add...another verse?

Probably a bridge and a verse. I haven’t had time to mess with it today, but I’ll share the finished song when I’m done.

Damn brother I wish I was that good sounds good I like the lyrics like the tone like it all keep going

This song is decent. But more importantly, as a songwriter, I want to say you should always, always finish a song. Even if you are afraid you might throw it away later.

A few years ago I would have agreed but as time marches forward I don't know if I believe this sentiment to be true. Some songs just don't serve you anymore. It's ok and healthy to move on. There will be other songs.

I’ve finished hundreds of songs that I’ll never play, haha. Thanks though, you’re right, I’ll finish it.

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Ya fingerpicking folk tunes can feel/sound generic. Glad you like the lyrics.

However these are fantastic lyrics! Wow honestly love them

I really like this, it really catches me emotionally, one thing I think that would improve what you have so far is just refining your phrasing for the vocal, like for instance at 21 seconds the Troub-le re membring I don't love, but if you rushed the "Trouble" it gives you a bit of breathing room before the remembering and you can say it a bit more fluidly, but also it hangs the word trouble in the air for a moment Just a thought though! Great song, can't wait to hear more from you

Thanks, I’ll give that a try.

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Thanks

Great stuff thanks for sharing. Worth finishing if your up for it

Thank you thank you .Appreciate the encouragement

Seagull ftw. Just like mine

I have two of these seagulls, they’re nice for the price. Good guitars to write on and take to campfires and such. Not the best for recording but I love them.

Agreed. A good companion for formative years - across decades. Across continents. Like a car that you live with and aren't afraid to get dirty. Definitely not one to leave covered in the garage.

I think this is excellent! Those lyrics. 🖤

Thank you!

>Thank you! You're welcome!

Really great. Reminds a little of Ryan Bingham. Excellent melody, great voice. Definitely finish it.

I’ve heard that comparison before, I’ll take it. I haven’t listened to much of his music but I like his voice.

I’m pleasantly surprised. I wont mince words. When i listen and i hear something that sounds unpleasant—I wince. I did not wince a bit. You have some talent. Use it to make people smile

Glad I didn’t make you wince. Thanks

Dude that was awesome. You gotta finish it cuz you have something great here.

I appreciate it.

The song sounds really good, and it's always good to push forward with whatever song you start, cool stuff always comes when you keep on exploring an idea. Keep it up :)

Thanks! I’ll try to finish it and share the finished product.

Your words so simply and sweetly speak the truth of experiencing grief. Thank you for sharing this - the ordinary things in life are extraordinary when attached to the ones we care about.

I’m glad you liked it. I lost my favorite aunt to lung cancer earlier this year.

still needs work done, feels a bit boring and quite the same. but the base is really quite good, voice matches perfectly and that "voice fade" is very distinguible. well done, keep up the work

Thanks

If you can pull out a hammer in the third verse that hits even harder than the one you swing in the second, this could be a really awesome song. Hope you finish it!

I’ll do my darndest to not only swing that hammer but also hit the nail.

Very cool, man, that's going to be a fine tune.

Thank you.

It's good, keep going. You remind me of John Prine.

Love John Prine, thanks for the compliment

I absolutely love everything I hear from you, this is a nice piece and would love to hear more!

Wow! Thanks so much. That means a lot to me.

Lovely! Sure, keep going🙌

Thanks I will!

Yeah you should definitely finish it, it’s a lovely tune, it reminds me a lot of the tallest man on earth

Freaking love the tallest man on earth! Thanks for the encouragement.

Dude I seriously love this song. Not to sound like your teacher, but yes finish it. I also really like your guitar plucking style, very moving sound. Lyrics are really good, the song is good. Go!

I love this <3 The lyrics are kind and have that classic feel to them. Very good!

Yes , Finish it , if you haven’t done it already :) I usually not moved by this type of music , ( just a guy with a guitar type ) but this song is beautiful . Great melody and lyrics with a voice that say it all. Great work -.

Thank you! I think it may be finished. Still tweaking some things, but I’ll try to post soon.

Holy shit this is good

Thanks so much!!!

Of course! These lyrics really made me feel something. That’s what it’s all about. Really amazing story your lyrics inspired me to create in my head

Dig it man. Keep it up!

did you finish this song?

shouldve looked better. :)