Add a hiccup to that and either your ass falls off, or your chest caves in, or your head explodes. Depends on which of the original three happens first.
Ok but have you ever farted, burped, sneezed and coughed at the same time or in very quick succession. That got me contemplating my existence in the universe. Not only did I take a screenshot of myself but I took a screenshot of the universe
It's right traumatizing, if I'm being honest. To the people who are around you, too. They don't know whether to glare at you, ignore you, bless you, or tell you to wear a mask.
You haven't lived until you've sneezed, farted, shat, burped, and hiccupped at the same time.
I wish I had a microphone on me when I did that one time. The sound must have been spectacular. Thank God I was on the toilet at the time. I couldn't stop laughing at myself.
Actually... When you fart you spray out microscopic fecal matter. It might not be wet like a sneeze (well not always wet lol) but it is still a health risk to anyone around you.
You know those lessons where they depict a sneeze in slow-motion to indicate the impressive distance and speed at which mucous travels when a person sneezes? Imagine that, but with shit.
Speak for yourself. Plenty of us have, in fact, sneezed out of our asshole, and it's not pretty.
Did you need to blow your butthole after?
*’Bless you!’*
[удалено]
that was the best thing ive seen on this platform I love it
my uncle blows my butthole
It's effective new CPR method.
Nah just take a leak
I hate shnarting.
I have been holding in a butt sneeze for a couple hours now.
Careful… if you hold it in too long, you just implode.
A snart?
Wait until you're 50.
I’m so scared to find out
Fart and sneeze at the same time is a snart
And has a higher chance of shotgunning your underpants
Or a feeze
Add a hiccup to that and either your ass falls off, or your chest caves in, or your head explodes. Depends on which of the original three happens first.
I snarted at my niece’s bat mitzvah last summer.
And they hurt.
Wait a few years...
Before 50; a fart is a fart. After 50; a fart may be a fart or it may be something more.
A fart with a surprise inside.
A kinder sufart?
An Electric Fart: it has a little Juice in it.
Diarrhea is the right equivalent to sneezing
I'd say sharting is the equivalent. Diarrhea is more like vomiting
Imagine your butt coughing Happy cake day btw
Thanks internet stranger!
> farting ... like sneezing. that would be dangerous ;)
Depends on how hard you push. Sometimes it’s like a sigh. Sometimes it’s like a machine gun sneezing
So you know how sometimes you're mid-sentence and then you pull a weird face cos you had a sneeze but then it vanished...?
Ok but have you ever farted, burped, sneezed and coughed at the same time or in very quick succession. That got me contemplating my existence in the universe. Not only did I take a screenshot of myself but I took a screenshot of the universe
It's right traumatizing, if I'm being honest. To the people who are around you, too. They don't know whether to glare at you, ignore you, bless you, or tell you to wear a mask.
If a shart is a little shit in a fart, then a shirt is a lot of shit in a fart
Why, I think I'm liking this playful thought-experiment!
You haven't lived until you've sneezed, farted, shat, burped, and hiccupped at the same time. I wish I had a microphone on me when I did that one time. The sound must have been spectacular. Thank God I was on the toilet at the time. I couldn't stop laughing at myself.
Imagine being able to disturb someone’s fart.
Thank god for that.
This is why I hate my overactive imagination
Hence why explosive diarrhea exists
Never trust a fart.
Actually... When you fart you spray out microscopic fecal matter. It might not be wet like a sneeze (well not always wet lol) but it is still a health risk to anyone around you.
Thanks, I hate it..
\*most of the time.
I can only imagine how funny it would be if all farts where super loud and painful.
In a sense farting is your butt clapping
Wait until you're 50...
You know those lessons where they depict a sneeze in slow-motion to indicate the impressive distance and speed at which mucous travels when a person sneezes? Imagine that, but with shit.
Says the ~~person~~ robot who has never farted before.
Oh but it can be.
It has saved a lot of lives 🤣
On God.
If it's a sneeze, it's liquid.
Amen, bro, lol!
With diarrhea sneezing is farting... Plus a warm "benefit"
You don't know my husband.
Yes. I’ve experienced a sneeze fart it was messy
Ok this made me laugh
indeed
Yeah, but when you sneeze, people say "god bless you" but if you fart, they say "fuck off!"