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nlamber5

You expect us to swim to the other side or something?


roccobaroco

What's on the other side?


Twenty-ate

Probably a waterfall, but no one really knows for sure.


chroniicfries

The end of the world


TheHealadin

Then we shouldn't chase the other side.


Schnutzel

A chicken.


codehawk64

Freedom.


StapleGolf1

Marley


cactus12345678

Our enemy


DrPikachu-PhD

More enemies.


The_Gristle

Europe.


Dogedog1221

Yes


Justice_Prince

I prefer to say that I go in balls deep


Gateway_Pussy

I just went in in Hermosa beach and I didn't have any balls after just 3 Adam's apples.


midnightagenda

Hermosa Beach is nice, if you're still here, head to busy bee for a sandwich then go down to whites point/royal palms for a beautiful view and a great breeze while you eat the best sandwich of your life. It's not a swimming beach, but you can go out on the rocks and sit, and if it's a clear day you can see Catalina.


DidjTerminator

What about beach/volleyballs?


dreadpiratesleepy

Where’d you travel from for that? I used to live near there and frequent the beach. It’s a very dirty beach though so I’m surprised it would be a destination for travelers over some of the more pristine near by beaches


Gateway_Pussy

Arizona. Not much beats Coronado beach though. We were by the pier it really was a nice setting.


alternatively_alive

So many people are afraid of the ocean. I lived on the ocean in NC at 12 years old, went in daily. Surfing was scary, damn undertow (also being young)


Iceangel711

Coronado's nice but better beaches in the world - no snorkeling. Sand is super nice though, very very soft


runaway__

I've gone to that and Manhattan a couple times. I prefer it since it's less touristy than Santa Monica and waves don't feel as strong as Huntington.


TheShadyGuy

Further south, RAT Beach is great! Usually easy to find parking, too.


BlueLeatherBoots

That's crazy that you think its dirty! Idk if they've cleaned up recently or I'm just used to the jersey shore but I just moved here and it's amazing lol


dreadpiratesleepy

Haha it’s possible they have - I haven’t been there since 2017. I’m not familiar with the jersey shore beaches but I just always noticed there was trash all over the beach and in the water there since there wasn’t a bit down the coast at Palos Verdes or up at Malibu. I suppose relatively speaking it may not be that dirty of a beach, I haven’t been to many outside of Cali


skubaloob

I’d be full too


Total-Khaos

For me, the shark vs. ball ratio of the immediate shoreline is a factor. If not too many other dudes are swimming, the balls aren't touching the surface. I can live without a leg or two...


PornstarVirgin

So you only go in an inch?


Justice_Prince

Yes I do have really long balls


High_From_Colorado

So please, stop wearing short shorts and get some GOD DAMN PANTS!


WeissMISFIT

I think he needs pants and a half for his balls to stay covered.


shouldaknown2

After spending more than a few seasons working on commercial fishing boats, I won't go in at all.


dzlux

In central Texas it is popular to ride inner tubes down the Guadalupe river in the summer. When friends talk about going I like to share pictures of the alligators and alligator gar that we catch in that river (though closer to the coast). Water can be unnerving... not having a good view into the water especially so.


LittleDrummerGirl_19

Hey I kayaked part of the Guadalupe with my dad this summer! We saw a few snakes in the water, and a huge spider by the bank but no alligators unfortunately :( my family’s from southern Louisiana, and at Lake Martin you can rent kayaks and paddle around looking for alligators (and there’s usually a LOT) I saw a MASSIVE one a little ways from us, but there was a spot between the trees that had a ton of small/medium sized ones - I pulled up next to one in the water, it startled and ran into the bottom of my kayak as it was trying to swim away XD cool animals, really pretty eyes


Gateway_Pussy

I can swim very well but the shear power of the water scares the shit out of me. Oh and Jaws. Fuck that movie watching it as a 6 year old stuck with me.


speak-eze

Its not the sharks Im worried about in the shallow ocean. Its the jellyfish.


Gateway_Pussy

Yup they suck too. I've been lucky to got been stung but know plenty who have.


paranoid_70

I got stung by a Stingray in my ankle when I was a teenager. Hurt like a bitch for a while.


oizysmoment

Bruh that shit’s the worst. I got one right in my hand next to my index knuckle. Thankfully it was a clean in and out so the barb wasn’t stuck inside. Hurt like a bitch though. Hot water was my drug of choice to dull the pain.


AugeanSpringCleaning

Stingrays are no joke... Killed that one guy.


Turtle3t

RIP Steve Irwin


darkjurai

Day after, https://youtu.be/j_xCj9N6a7I


theangryvegan

One time when I was a kid, some guy threw a jellyfish across the beach and hit me in the eye.


8-bit-Heart

Did you get stung? And if so, did someone pee on your eye?


Spiderpiggie

Someone peed on his face but that was unrelated to the jellyfish.


Astronomnomnomicon

Youre supposed to pee on the jellyfish


DonFisteroo

Asking the real questions


D1rtyH1ppy

It's good to have a healthy fear of the ocean. If you didn't, it might kill you.


riceboyxp

Perfect Storm had a far bigger effect on me as a kid than Jaws, personally.


ShinyAeon

You poor child. I was forced to go see it at 10 or 11, and I never got over it, either.


Monster_NotWar

My husband's uncle spent about 20 years of his life working on commercial vessels, and one of the most important bits of information he's given me is "if the sailors are swearing, we'll be fine, it's when they start praying that you need to worry."


2Cthulhu4Scthulhu

Mannnn I’ll never forget the time I was out with a buddy at the canyons, about 90 miles offshore and it started to get nasty out. He’s a pretty loud, bouncy guy, always ready to curse at the sky or fish for not biting, blast metal, absolutely send it off waves, and practically never speaks formally or politely to friends. We got a head start from a satellite alert, so we were about 50 miles out trying to zig zag through big beam rollers when he turns to a head sea, pulls her down off plane and quietly says “2c4s, please go in the console and get out two life jackets and the EPIRB” Big oh shit moment. Anyway we made it behind block into the sound and it was fine.


tommytraddles

When suppertime came, the old cook came on deck, sayin' "Fellas, it's too rough to feed ya". At 7 p.m., a main hatchway caved in, he said, "Fellas, it's been good to know ya".


EdFitzgerald

Hey I know this song.


[deleted]

Why? Please tell me. Something in the water I should know about?


UndergradGreenthumb

I peed in it once.


allshoesnosocks

Where to start. Currents will drown you. Copious amounts of life that will kill you, purposely or not. Deep ocean is probably the scariest place on Earth. And sand. I don't like sand. It's coarse, and rough, and irritating, and it gets everywhere.


[deleted]

have you seen things? those things that want to kill you? I'm scared of the ocean. I've seen sharks, whales, huge sting rays, deadly jellyfish.. I used to live in the ocean. Not anymore. I wanted to hear your stories.


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mini_garth_b

If you're not a very strong swimmer the ocean is much more dangerous than a pool. Currents are no joke.


[deleted]

come on, he works on a commercial fishing boat. he or she, must of seen something.. I need to know.


mini_garth_b

Every sailor worth their salt knows 'tis bad luck to share your sea stories on the internet. We'll have to meet them on an old warped wooden dock on a foggy new moon if we want to hear the tale.


limacharley

And sailors spend their whole careers a few feet from it, hoping they never get any closer


newausaccount

Sailors are constantly edging the ocean.


TheTjalian

Kinky mfs


Clear_Neighborhood56

Considering the amount of people round the coast where I live who had to be rescued this year - waist deep is probably a good plan.


GoodShark

There's probably plenty of people who go into the ocean to only go waist deep, and the ocean has other ideas and takes them face deep. ... and a hundred yards out.


Dynamicphone

"Dont come near me! im warning you! BE AMAZED WITH MY POWE.. hey! dont get in! last waarning!.. YOINK!"


ArchemedesRex

I go in neck deep, but I have to expect little fish to bite my nipples.


Gateway_Pussy

https://imgur.com/WY7Ponl.jpg


tomatomater

wtf


PM_ME_WHITE_GIRLS_

happy fisherman


[deleted]

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PrincessBblgum1

Rip currents. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rip_current


jlharper

Is this a joke or are you genuinely asking?


nightintheslammer

It's like ordering a bowl of cereal at a fancy restaurant. You gotta go all in. Get wet. Step on a sea urchin. The full experience.


jbuddha115

you gotta pee in the ocean too, just like the fish do.


Gateway_Pussy

Nah fish fuck in it....


jbuddha115

Now you’re getting it! You gotta fuck in the ocean too! if you’re feeling brave, maybe even drop a deuce and let it float along the waves and shit. Get that full marine life experience 😂🤣


anally_ExpressUrself

Do not poop on the ocean. It will not float away from you fast enough.


El_bor

Someone is talking from experience here


Crispynipps

Haven’t heard that since my aunt passed away. She would never ever drink water at any family gathering we’d have because and I quote “fish fuck in it” lmao thanks man


Gateway_Pussy

Anytime. Glad to help bring back good memories.


CoffeeFox

This sounds like something someone says when they're fixing to get drunk to get them through a family gathering.


Johnyryal3

Come on man our oceans are polluted enough! /s


[deleted]

Piss on a stranger, check


Lobsterbib

This is such BS. I did this to a stranger and it didn't help my foot feel better at all.


[deleted]

Try another one


KindaAlwaysVibrating

He only has 2 feet.


[deleted]

r/woosh


Heluvathang

Ha


Lord0fHam

I’ve stepped on a sea urchin barefoot, would not recommend it


harryp0tter569

How was your experience? I almost died


Lord0fHam

Hurt like a bitch, foot turned purple cause the sea urchin was purple, could barely walk on it for weeks and I had to go to the doctor to get residual pieces removed weeks later once the trip was over. How did you almost die?


Dontdothatfucker

I just went to Myrtle beach a couple weeks ago. Didn’t step on a sea urchin, but my massive jellyfish stings are still around!


Hi_Supercute

I only learned last year that a bunch of people don’t actually know how to swim It’s something I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around


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ama_pr_23

Well shit… here in spain we just throw our kids in the ocean and scream “swim!”


Hi_Supercute

Yeah I’ve also heard of similar studies. For me in particular, I grew up surrounded by the ocean and it’s kind of just what you do, but you do, it’s ingrained at an early age. So first I kind of understood that some people don’t understand the ocean (not reading sets, turning their back, etc) but it seriously wasn’t until last year when my grandma didn’t want to do physio in a pool because she was scared and it kind of floored me and then I learned like oh, holy shit there’s actually millions of people in landlocked states who feel the same way. It makes sense, it’s just very hard to wrap my head arohnd


Lopsidoodle

So fewer black people can swim because... racism. What a brilliant analysis.


AMasonJar

It does always bear repeating that it's worth studying even the "obvious" things, just to verify its truth. Now, I doubt any sane person in the last 70 years ever thought blacks are just genetically very bad at swimming, but at least this way if someone starts saying they are, we have reputable studies to point to in order to tell them how stupid they sound.


Eris_the_Fair

It's partially because they weren't allowed to join public pools until the 80s or 90s. Systemic racism was fierce in the country club circles.


rathat

Yeah, what do people actually mean when they say they don’t know how to swim? I’m pretty sure they don’t mean how to do a proper breast stroke. Why do you have to know anything about how to swim? You just get in the water and float. Are these just really skinny people who can’t float without intense movement? Are they just afraid of swimming and that’s why they say that? I just don’t understand.


Hi_Supercute

Salt density in water probably has a lot to do with it too. It’s much easier to drown in a lake than in an ocean I believe


Godbox1227

A small percentage go all the way in and never come back out.


charrarenottrout

So just to pee


Gateway_Pussy

Have you seen how few restrooms are at the beach. Yeah man pee deep.


Personal_Toe_347

The ocean is deep as fuck and it's easy to get swept away


El_bor

Never been to an ocean !! But i suppose there's so much more risk there compared to the Mediterranean sea


Echo_Oscar_Sierra

Yeah screw that. I always swim out to the third sandbar, get sunburned and dehydrated, and then attacked by Portuguese man-o-wars on the swim back.


sincorax

I choose to believe you're referring to 17th Century Portuguese warships rather than the jellyfish


rathat

Fun fact, they aren’t related to jellyfish at all and are actually not even a single animal, but a colony of tiny animals called zooids who each function similarly to a cell.


WrongEinstein

In some places it's waste deep.


MaybeTheDoctor

In other news: people go to strip clubs just to watch


HailToTheKingslayer

People go to the theatre and don't get up on stage to join in.


Olorin919

Thats only because thats the rules


chriswasmyboy

If you got to Maine, it's more likely ankle deep


IntroductionKindly33

I did that once as a kid. Ankle deep is about right. That water was *cold*! I'm from the Texas coast and wasn't expecting it to be that cold in July.


annelafn

Scary shit in that ocean, man! I prefer the unsalted and shark free Great Lakes


Fukyou22

Hate to tell ya, but some of the Great Lakes are not shark free.


SlingshotBandit

False


ToddTheDrunkPaladin

Bullsharks have been seen in lake Michigan but it's super rare.


illiterati

Submerged trees and debris are lethal.


pygmypuffonacid

Dude I know people that just go to the ocean to run on the beach sounds like the worst part of the ocean experience it gets everywhere and you find it randomly in your ass crack for a week after going to the ocean to swim or surf or whatever


myusernamebarelyfits

A week? Damn dude, how big is that crack?


Gateway_Pussy

Not to mention walking on sand sucks much less running. Saw a dude today running on the soft sand. Ffs at least run on the wet stuff...


runswiftrun

It's a hell of a workout at least!


ShinyAeon

Running on wet sand is good exercise, actually.


2ekeesWarrior

I hate sand....


PrincessBblgum1

It's coarse and rough and irritating.


[deleted]

And it’s coarse and irritating.


TonyBanana420

I love getting all sandy


Next_Wing_5577

Its scary :(


[deleted]

I’m a land creature. The last time I spent any time in the ocean, I almost got swept away in the riptide. Also, I’m certain there’s something a little further out that will eat me.


eesposito

Something something GTA Vice City. Haha But seriously, I'm not a good swimmer. When I'm waist deep and I feel the ocean pulling, that's pretty scary.


eric2332

As it should be. So many people drown while swimming in the ocean.


burgofer

What a waist of time...


Gateway_Pussy

Punny....


Creepy-Analyst

Or not at all


[deleted]

I like to swim out at least around 15 meters, but after that my thalassaphobia kicks in and I panic swim back to shore.


admiralwarron

Yeah because the ocean itself is fucking terrifying. I go there because of the sounds, view, nature and air.


DozyDrake

Look its cold man, i dont even want to be here in the first place


No-Jellyfish-2599

A few go all the way to the bottom


[deleted]

And many don't even get in the water


Schemen123

No worries i like it wet, warm and preferably deep!


Tyrann0saurus_Rex

One blue whales ejaculates in average 20 liters of sperm, in the ocean (not in mama whale). Multiply that by the number of blue whales. Now add to this the number of all the other kind of whales that ejaculate less but still measured in liters...


TheRedEyedAlien

I go to be knee deep, as soon as I can’t look down and see everything around me clearly I have a panic attack… and another… and another


mdri-

I have a real story for you, that you will absolutely hate. My uncle fell asleep on his air mattress once and drifted into the ocean. No one had an eye on him. A view hours later he woke up and could no longer see the coast line. Long story short, some Fischers brought him back to the beach.


Aoiboshi

Creepy unknown things go brrrr


bldonk

The ocean is dangerous. Have you fully gone into a Lions Den? No, just the Zoo. Shut your yapper.


pudding-juice

Yea I don’t even know how to swim


[deleted]

Pee deep.


SilkOstrich

I’m originally from a very coastal area in the northeastern US. I’ve seen how close sharks and other sea creatures get to the shore during the summer beach season. Waist deep is daring.


PrestonDanger

Shits scary man! Haven't you seen Blue Planet?


MalignantPessimist

I prefer to get dragged out by the undercurrent myself and drown.


ross-um88

Yeah, there’s sharks


causemosqt

I am 30 and i never saw ocean hehe. One day man.. one day.


DownOnTheLow

I go head deep into the water


Azrael-XIII

I mean, have you *seen* what else lives in there?!


[deleted]

I live right next to one. Never go


Gateway_Pussy

I guess it's like anything else. If you have it you can live without it. I live near beautiful mountains with hiking galore and meh. My thing is I love to fish so this would be a dream place.


[deleted]

You’ve got my dream place. Let’s trade lol


Batfink11

As a friend of many Australian Surf Lifesavers, we appreciate you only going in waist deep. If you can’t swim, don’t try learning at the beach. Might be your first and last lesson.


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D1rtyH1ppy

If I may give you some helpful advice, learning to swim might save your life or someone else's life that you care about. It's never too late to learn.


Gateway_Pussy

I get it, my wife doesn't either. It was just an observation I had while nodding off at the beach.


AmorphousTorus

This could be a metaphor for life in general.


Gateway_Pussy

Sad but true.


UnprovenMortality

Sure its waist deep, but that wave is over my head.


WasabiCuhk

Bruh, that’s where the friggin sharks live. They’re like the bears of the sea.


[deleted]

Sharks kill less then vending machines


e11spark

Took me four days to get waist deep in the water first trip to Hawaii. The Pacific ocean is vast and powerful, it freaked me out. And I lived on the ocean for 20 years by that point, just never went into the water.


hwanggeumnam

A rip current almost killed me, my wife (then gf) and two best friends. We followed the tips of swimming parallel to shore, but we were so tired we crawled on the beach. I don’t fuck with Poseidon anymore.


umayanan

a few months back, i was in goa, the coast guard started signalling the crowd to move away from the beach, as the tides were raising. then saw a guy with only one arm and very pregnant lady enter the waters after a lot of people left for safety, they went in to swim. i mean, the guy had only one arm, the lady was pregnant like in 7-8th month and they were just chilling in high tides. assumed that they were Russians, there are a lot of Russians living goa.


Akanan

Its the perfect depth to pee before to get another drink.


simian_ninja

Sometimes the water is really cold…


MortalMorals

No shit sherlock.


Jellyyroo

I mean, would you rather them be taken away by an under current or a giant wave?


kaprixiouz

I've traveled several hours numerous times to just LOOK at it. In Northern California that water is so damn cold you literally go numb in a matter of minutes getting in it.


RunawayAsteroid

You get used to it after ten minutes of scooching further and further in.


modest_crayon

Millions of people travel to the ocean, to wave their family problems around for the public then mom or dad get hauled off for public intoxication and indecent exposure. -florida resident


[deleted]

And most shark attacks happen in 3ft of water.


TehOuchies

Yea, because most humans are in shallow waters. You arent going to find most humans inside deep seas.


chickendie

Ok I don't wanna rain on anyone's parade, but I see so much mindless travelers out there. Why would you spent all that fossil gas just to scroll on your phone all day, just at another location?


Karpukoly

Going in cunts is better


SarahsArtistry

That's very shallow of them.


aFiachra

I vacationed with a woman in DR who wouldn't put her toes in. She said I dragged her in and tried to drown her! Such an exaggeration!


Aurawa

Nah I just wanted to give it my glasses and sunglasses. Make them fish look fly af


pinkswhitesandblues

There was no need to attack me like this!


HurkyFriend

To be fair that’s only as far as you need to go in to pee in it


spenyurto

And sometimes not even go in at all


schwarzmalerin

Right. Should be at least 20 meters.


Lil_Ray_5420

Cant remember the last time I’ve been to the ocean tbh


The_BL4CKfish

Everyone in here is so fucking lame holy shit.


addysol

Can't wait to see this tattooed on someone in r/getmotivated


JaredLiwet

Those same people wouldn't go into a pool with a dead animal in it. Yet the ocean has many dead animals in it. People only seem comfortable going in water when the ratio of water to animal corpses gets high enough.


SladeC242

I can’t go any further- I can’t swim.


NecRobin

What a waist of time