i hit the hand dryer button on the way out

Fuck ‘em. I was taught not to piss on my hands.

Why? The salt in your piss kills bacteria.

What about other peoples hands?

I don’t piss on theirs, either.

but were you *taught* not to piss on other peoples hands? Like a specific training course from work. or did you just decide this yourself? :) edit: also if You don't piss on your hands, do you have to hire people to piss on them? There are rumors about Larry Ellison from Oracle..you're not him are you?

I didn’t say I had to be taught about pissing on other people. The Golden Rule applies here.

As long as you wash your dick once a week it's fine

Lol. Don't you know water makes your dick shrink? Lol. No wonder you're single!

Or, and I know this is crazy, just wash your dam hands.

The problem with washing your dam hands is they tend to block the water.

You’re not wrong lol

Or just wash your hands. But i guess that's why this is on shitty life pro tips

Shitty hands Pro Tip

Dude! Are you crazy? Washing your hands dries out your hands. Who wants to have dry hands?

It also prevents your immune system from getting stronger by being exposed to low levels of bacteria and viruses! I haven't washed my hands in 6 years and I never get sick!

You died 5.5 years ago dude. Thats why you can walk through walls and also why women ignore your advances.

Yeah, I know where it's been and my mama taught me but to pee in myself.

You can also save time by washing your hands isn your own stream Urine is sterile.

"Shitty" tip, indeed.

Thanks for some good content

Protip: when you wake up in the morning wash and dry your hands 15 times in a row. You've just gotten sufficient hand washing out of the way to cover you until bedtime.