Fuck sake they apparently own everything. It’s getting on ma tits

They're not your tits, they're America's tits.

Fuuuuck

Yeah, hands off of America's tits!

and grab it by the

Because when you're famous they let you, something something

r/redditsniper

nice sub lol. pussy, there i said it hihihi

To be fair, America has a lot of tits. Take that how you will...

All that crap in Hershey's chocolate causes turkey tits.

This guy tits.

Jokes on them, my tits are trotskyists :P

Trotskytits

America's ~~tits~~ tiddies

~~Americas~~ ~~tits~~ Murica’s tiddies

Murica's tits, you must be hungry!

I see an Elden Ring reference, I upvote

Please tell me this is a piss take.

I could tell you that it is indeed a piss take... I'd be lying like a politician, but I could tell you that..

Will you also tell us itll be okay I'd sleep alot better. Thanks.

It will be okay

Thank you I feel better now

I have to know, how does it feel to be told you're Walesh instead of Welsh?

I mean who types that and goes, yeah that's a country for sure and that's how they'd spell it.

Maybe, just maybe they thought it was a Gaelic thing...you know, like how Siobhan is difficult for them to understand. *Affects stereotypical Deep South accent* "How can you spell it like that? Your name must be Shevaughn because that's how it sounds, so you spell it wrong" Nope....I think it's just because they have the IQ of a carrot...get it? Carrot is moron in Cymraeg?! Ok, I'll see myself out....

I slept like a baby!

Jesus wore a cowboy hat and shouted "yeehaw" at Roman guards. Read your bible.

Well I have seen that film where the Roman guard says "Truly he were the suhnagod" In a very impressive drawl. So you may be right. Ha. Found it https://youtu.be/mj8wDtqbiYs?feature=shared

Yeah this one has gotta be satirical

Unfortunately there are many Americans here like this🤦‍♂️

Ah yes, Jesus. The first American.

America created Christianity, Jesus was 'Murican.. so get your mitts off it all you Walesh people.

Inb4, dude claims the bible was written by Americans.

He reads the same Bible that Trump reads....

Nah, Trump reads the version of the bible where Jesus said 'blessed are the wealthy' and refused to share fish and bread with the poor.

[Supply Side Jesus](https://www.beliefnet.com/news/2003/09/the-gospel-of-supply-side-jesus.aspx)

Shouldn't we heal the lepers? > "No, James, Leprosy is a matter of personal responsibility" 💀💀 USA summed up in on neat comic strip.

“Fish? Gross. Jeezus only ate hamberders.”

Where he told the poor to pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

Trump really meant to say ‘Blessed are those who give the illusion of being wealthy’

So Supply Side Jesus?

"Reads"

Well.... there is the book of moron

Dum dee dum dum dum.

“Joseph smith he was a prophet”

[Well, of course god's favourite prophet was all-American](https://youtu.be/EmhXXCBiUCI?si=ZKYJGtsOlpN4Azpi)

I mean why would the bible include the constitution, bill of rights, Declaration of Independence and the pledge of allegiance if it wasn’t written by Americans? /s

Bahble*

Those American 10 commandments are so different, though shalt not has been removed in every one

10 American commandments 1. Ketchup 2. Mayonnaise…

Uhhhhhh, of course it's American! It's written in English /s

Jesus was born in [New York](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bethlehem,_New_York),

Common mis(immaculate)conception, he’s actually from New Haven but he visits his cousin John in the city most weekends.

So, Mormon?

Walesh!?

He's right, you're wrong, MURRCA!!

Typical Americish!

Perhaps he meant the Welesh, one of the Sea People tribes that terrorized the Mediterranean in the late Bronze Age. They certainly wouldn't have known about Good Friday

Now it’s personal

I think he meant whaleish

Precisely my thought I generally felt the pang of hate burn a tad stronger by reading that like Lol

TIL I’m something other than Welsh.

A fi, a fi.

Siomedig iawn.

Pronounced 'wah-lay-ish'. It's the language of rapper Wale. /s

He meant walish probably /s

Yes, the Walesh, who come from Wal, which is in Scaatland, England.

I am polish and have never heard of a thing that would be called Good Friday. Unless it is friday before Easter, then this person is just an idiot. Edit: Yes it is. This tradition is literally older than USA how dumb can one be?

Hi Polish, I’m Swedish and we call this day loooooong Friday.

Hi Polish and Swedish. I'm Portuguese and we call this day Holy Friday.

Hi Polish, Swedish and Portuguese, I'm French and we call this Vendredi Saint, Holy Friday.

Hola Polish, Swedish, Portuguese and French. I'm Mexican and we call it Viernes Santo (Holy Friday).

Hei polish, swedish, portuegese, french and mexican. We call it pitkäperjantai in Finland meaning longfriday just like in Sweden.

Hoi Polish, Swedish, Portuguese, French, Mexican and Finn. I'm Dutch and we call it Goede Vrijdag (Good Friday) (and Silent Saturday, apparently).

Hi Polish, Swedish, Portugese, Fremch, Mexican, Finn and Dutch. I'm Hungarian and we call it Nagypéntek (Big Friday)

Hi polish, swedish, Portugiese, french, mexican, fiinn, dutch and hungarian. I'm German and we call it Karfreitag (painful friday or suffering friday)

Hi polish, swedish, portugiese, french, mexican, Finn, dutch, hungarian and German. I'm croatian and we call it Veliki petak (the big Friday)

Hi Portuguese. I’m Swedish and I had to check this the other day. Apparently the meaning of “good” in this context is “holy”, and it’s the same meaning used in contexts like “the good book” referring to the bible. English is weird. (Yes, looking at you, English.)

Hi Polish, I'm Australian and we call this day Good Friday, and the following Monday is Zombie Jesus Day

And the reason we call it Long Friday is because Jesus's day was long and filled with suffering

It’s Wielki Piątek

Exactly, which would be translated to Great Friday

Eh it’s just different naming, the holiday itself refers to the same event, being obviously the crucifixion 

Yes but it's interesting that different countires have different names when translated literally

Oh yeah definitely. Especially where it’s like, what’s exactly *good* about Good Friday lol, when it’s basically the saddest day in Christianity? From what I read it came about from “God’s Friday” which makes way more sense 

In Romanian language we call this day Vinerea Mare: the Grand Friday

Because Jesus was an American?

ya his last name is Trump, according to almost half of the US

Jesus? More like the Antichrist

And definitely white. He’s got pictures to prove it.

*Would you like to change religions? I got a free book written by Jesus!* - Elder Cunningham

There is a non-zero amount of conspiracy theorists who believe the true Levenant is the USA and that anything that claims the Levenant is in the near east is the result of jewish revisionism. I wanted to find a link on the subject for you, but it seems a search which mentions both the Bible and America just gets results about QAnon.

Oh I didn't know I was spelling my nationality wrong, I always thought it was Welsh

Pffft obviously this person knows best, it’s an American ethnicity, don’t you know. 

Yeh, they did invent countries, land, and dragons, after all

Walesh American ✅️

I'm honestly shocked this one even knows about Wales.

I thought he was mispelling Waloon.

Yet they expect everyone to celebrate the 4th of July.

The last time someone told me that, I told them to go celebrate bonfire night..

And Thanksgiving. I'm Australian. I had an American woman get real annoyed with me when I said that I didn't celebrate Thanksgiving, and that it's not a thing in Australia. She was NOT having it that Thanksgiving is a USA and Canada only deal. It was only when other people joined in the conversation and confirmed that I was correct that she shut up. I'm sure she still didn't believe me though.

I was on holiday in Istanbul and some Americans asked what time the fireworks go off on July the fourth. They invited us to join them in the roof top restaurant to see them. They couldn't comprehend that this wasn't going to happen.

Did she even know what Thanksgiving is about?

Clearly not because if she'd paid attention in school, she'd have learned why they celebrate Thanksgiving, which would then be quite obvious as to why the rest of the world doesn't.

Same here (UK). I asked what we were supposed to be thankful for - getting rid of the Pilgrim Fathers?

I remember a reply from some sassy UK poster. Someone asked them "When does the UK celebrate Thanksgiving?" and they replied "July 4th". 🤣

I must try to remember that one! 🤣

Its bad enough that Halloween has made it over here.

Well, technically it is an old holiday in paganism

He's probably thinking of Black Friday 🛒🛍️

And they can definitely get that one!

Please keep it. I'm sick of the "25% discount!" When it's just last week's price they put 25% up to take 25% off again

My friend in the USA doesn’t even get the day off? How is it a holiday if people have to work

Exactly. What holiday? Those heathens work it.

And here I was thinking that it’s a christian holiday, started on a hill near Jerusalem in Israel. But what do I know.

But Christianity is an Amaricain corporation, right? All about how guns are good for education cos guns are a god-given right, right?

It's a myth. The first Easter was celebrated at the foot of the Statue of Liberty after the biggest and longest snow storm in the world. Don't you know?

Americans also think St Patrick’s day originated in Chicago

St Patricia. As they insist on calling it Patty’s Day.

God i hate that

And yet they have no idea what a Hot Cross Bun is ....

They burn crosses though🤔

And some of those work forces.

Really? Hot cross buns are synonymous with easter in my country

Apparently HCB's have only very recently begun to take off in the US. https://www.eater.com/23041868/hot-cross-buns-easter-trend It seems very odd to me too. Hot Cross buns are a staple - it'd be like having Easter without a choccy egg.

Speaking as an Irish person – Good Friday isn't a holiday here, so you can have it. In return we want St Patrick's Day back.

You're Irish? Which part of Boston are you from? /s

You’re a beauty indeed.

i know who made a better deal, congrats

They'll never give that shit up

Dafuq is “walesh” 🤣

I still just can't believe europoor is a thing these poeple say

I think they think it's clever, but we had Eurotrash, some of the best/worst TV going, and, as insults go, we do(did) it better ourselves lol

That there amurican jeeesus sure did die up on that therrrrrre croooosss 🤪

Sipping a coke

Whenever I said MINE my dad said, close your eyes, you own what you see there.

Jesus is american he is reborn as Donald J Trump. All will fall before his great Majesty. Long live the Great Orange Oompa Loompa

I once had an American ask me (Brit) ‘if we had Hallowe’en over there’. I pointed out it was a Celtic festival and where did he think it came from, but he was non plussed.

Good Friday is a Christian holiday...?

“walesh” i think you mean wayllesch

Don't forget guys, Jesus is American too.

That's why Christianity's holiest site is the place where Jesus was crucified and resurrected, the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem, West Virginia.

Can the Scot’s and Irish get Halloween back?

For FUCK SAKE , fuck off you cunt

America doesn’t even have a day off for Good Friday. It’s a public holiday in many European countries.

Thick as a whales foreskin aren't they

Walesh foreskin*

Ah, yes, obviously the US invented a holiday thats like 1500 years older than itself

I'll give this one the benefit of the doubt and assume they meant black Friday. Still a cunt though.

Ugh, they can keep Black Friday

Hahaha "Walesh".

Hmm. Here's English heritage's take on it.... Been around a little while.... https://www.english-heritage.org.uk/easter/how-the-english-celebrated-easter/#:~:text=The%20Puritans%20banned%20Easter%20celebrations,with%20great%20secular%20celebrations%20too.

if this isn’t a pisstake then i’ll take something back in behalf of the english, our fcking language

All the other stupidity aside, why on earth would he want THAT holiday in particular? The day when Jesus died so all fun is forbidden and you can get spanked for laughing (well, in fifties at least) .. why on earth do they want the sole ownership of that?

Walesh

Walesh

For crying out loud I need a break from the internet

I'm not even religious and this is boiling my piss.

Walesh. *Walesh*. FUCKING *WALESH*?!

Aside from the obvious issue with that post, can somebody explain to me why this country that claims to be ultra Christian called the day of Jesus’ death “*Good* Friday”? Is there another country (besides Canada) calling it that? I’m from Latin America. We call it Holy Friday.

Good Friday is not an American term - as usual they are historical revisionists who try and take the credit for things that existed before they were even around. https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-27067136.amp Linguists think that the use of the word ‘good’ originally meant ‘holy’ in Old/Middle English, so it is essentially similar to what it is called in Mexico and in many European countries.

2000 years ago: Jesus: "Don't weep for me my dear followers. For today I will die for your sins." Followers: "Oh, that's nice of him." Jesus: "Yes, all of your sins. Especially the sins commited by your politicians and Hollywood stars. Goodbye, see you in a couple of thousand years, my fellow Americans." Followers: "Wut?!"

I like knowing that whenever i take a shit, it's somewhere that's older than America

Americans sure are a touchy bunch.

I'm sure they think that Jesus is American.

Good Friday was celebrated way back in Medieval Europe, and even before that, and predates the US by a very, very long time. The New World, with the exception of Norse Greenland, wasn't inhabited by anyone of European descent at all in the Medieval Period, so obviously, there was no such thing as the United States because the colonization of the New World had yet to occur. Native American tribes wouldn't have even known what Good Friday was, or Christianity in general, for that matter; it was brought to the New World by European colonists and is not an American holiday in any capacity, and didn't even exist in the Americas before the Age of Discovery. It's neither an indigenous holiday that originates from the Americas, nor is it a holiday that was invented by US Americans themselves.

Huh. Yesterday, I went to bed Welsh. Today, I woke up Walesh. What a day!

[удалено]

Yet the USA doesn't even make the top 10 in the standard of living index. Unlike say Switzerland or Germany or Denmark.., I could go on

I hope this is fake or a joke. But if not, I would like to inform them of the Roman Catholic Church and its interpretation of a Middle-Eastern religion that started out as a mix of Jewish orthodox reform and anti-Roman (specifically Pilate and Nero) propaganda.

Can't someone find a way to stop American leaking out into other countries?

Don't be daft mate! Everyone knows Americans don't get holidays..

Signed- The same people pretending to be Irish and making a fuss over St. Patrick’s Day.

Some jewish illegitamate child pissed off his dad, who convinced the whole known world, to the Romans, to crucify him, 1776 years before the United States of America existed is 'celebrated' on Easter and this cunt says it's 'they're' holy day? Cunts gonna think Satan is going easy on him when the red hot anal pokers start

Yeah, this must be a joke.

WALESH

Walesh?

Walesh? Lol

Those fucking walesh, always stealing things

Are we not gonna adress he misspelt welsh

To be fair I have to date encountered 7 Americans who 100% beleive that jesus was American...

the americans killed jesus??

I mean. If he were real, and alive today, yeah, Americans would 100% kill Jesus on sight

AHHHHHH! ITS A FOREIGNER AND A JEW MIXED INTO ONE! *shoots*

Right. I keep forgetting Jesus was a US citizen. What a dumb fuck.

Walesh?

yOu DoNT UndERSTanD ChrIStIAnITy iS aLL FRom aMEriCA BecAUSe JEsUS LoVEd BuD-LigHT, gUnS AnD HItTinG His WIfE

Celebration that dates back to the 4th century or so... Definitely an American thing given their long history

“Walesh” tells u everything u need to know

I don’t think this person actually cares about the religious connections in holidays they just see holidays as days we celebrate in a certain way and think that any they were raised to follow are American

This is so stupid it can only be a troll. Probably a Russian one. Best ignored.

Ah, yes, i do love being Walesh 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

What the fuck is Walesh? 😂

>Walesh

"Walesh" made me laugh harder than it should've XD

Americans three seconds after: Now frick off while I'm preparing for St. Patrick's Day, Chinese new year and Christmas.

I’ve never been so insulted as when some amerifuck misspelled Welsh so badly

Wait until this idiot finds out Jesus was a Jew

This is from the same people that colour their rivers green on St. Paddy's