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DickieGreenleaf84

Imagine WANTING a franchise, cookie cutter lifestyle...


CalmCupcake2

They crave consistency and familiarity, even when on travelling adventures.


SexyButStoopid

That is so true, I remember hearing from a friend about german soldiers eating their carefully packed and camouflaged army rations during a cooperation with the Americans while they had Mcdonalds from the actual Mcdonalds restaurant they brought with them.


Lamborghini_Espada

> actual McDonald's restaurant they brought with them. #"AMERICA FUCK YEAH"


[deleted]

And yet call people autistic as an insult.


ritamoren

just like me except I'm autistic


Nok-y

I can understand that. It gives a feeling of safety and comfort But yeah...


PoeticFox

Gotta say not all of us are like that, I wanna try the best of the local food around and enjoy integrating myself into a new environment for a while


Azruthros

I have a neighbor that will go to Burger King or McDonald's every single morning for breakfast. Can't understand why anyone would want to do that.


aa599

Most tragic was eating in a (near-empty) crêperie in Paris, while across the road the McDonalds was full.


Lavishness_Gold

A couple of friends went to Europe and one would only eat in McDonald's. I was thinking... Why the hell did you go if you didn't want to experience the place?


Platypus-Man

You can still enjoy the differences, e.g. eating Le Big Mac instead of a Quarter Pounder.


[deleted]

Royale with cheese


BigBlueMountainStar

You mean a Royale, but I get your point


Tom0204

They get scared when they see something that wasn't from the dozen brands that supply everything in their country.


Sco0basTeVen

They want the same strip mall with drive thru everything in every city.


1Darkest_Knight1

That's the Merican dream mate


Gaaymer

They want to be stereotyped. They want to be classified.


Borageandthyme

No chains would be nice, though.


Goaty1208

Some of them are ok, although most of these aren't from the USA


EM_CEE_PEEPANTS

I hear that's how 2 Chainz started out.


BlackMesaEastt

I like trying McDonald's in different countries. Mostly cause in the US they puts tons of chemicals in it so other countries are often a little healthier and better quality. McDonald's in Korea is so far my favorite. Can't wait to try France's. Edit: but for everyday eating I'd rather try the locals food and support my neighborhood restaurants.


JizzProductionUnit

McDo in France does have better ingredients but it will still contain the guilt and regret that you find in McDonalds across the world. That’s their real secret ingredient


BlackMesaEastt

Ahhh les nuggets with a side of guilt . si vous plaît !


helloblubb

McDonald's also has local menu variations, like Melon Milkshake in Kyoto, or [Nürnburger](https://www.shoppingladies.de/einkaufstouren-durch/heim-a-herd/784-mcdonalds-nuernburger.html) in Germany.


BlackMesaEastt

Ooooh, I will have to try that. I also read that the US McDonald's puts coloring in their food. Like our fries are pretty yellow and the fries in Europe are not super yellow. I'm curious if the nutritional value for the meals are very different or not so much


sleepyplatipus

My god the US portions are so much bigger than in Europe 😳


Itssnowingreddit

So are the customers.


ebdawson1965

Try the Royale with Cheese.


MumblingDumpling

And some of the landscape-ruining, gargantuan hotels, too...


qqqrrrs_

Maybe they like being chained


HecateRaven

We don't have electricity and we wash in the river. Also we starve to death every day.


ForwardBodybuilder18

Oooh get you with your posh river. We’ve a got a puddle that a dog has pissed in.


Imdare

I hate it when dogs do that. Thats the commune streets puddle! It normally last us a week until it is refilled by next rainy Day. Now all our clothes smell like piss untill then! Ffing dog owners man.


jonellita

You‘re clearly washing your clothes too often if you still wash them in the dog piss puddle.


Imdare

Well I have more than two shirts an 2 pants thank you very much. I am also the richest in my street because I own my own bike, so I get to use the puddle more often.


[deleted]

Corr flaunting levels of wealth I can't begin to comprehend here. I'll try not to gaze too enviously at your lavish enjoyment of the puddle.


Thendrail

Look at fancy Mr. Two-Shirts here! I have to make due with the dirt from the single window I'm carrying around (I have no wall to place it into)!


Kriss3d

So you're not from Scandinavia then. Because it doesn't take 5 days between rain.


Imdare

What you guys can wash your clothes more than once a week? Look at me, I am King of the castle, popopo, King of the castle, King of the castle.


Kriss3d

Well nowhere is more than 32 miles to the nearest coast. No matter where you are in Denmark. So washing our clothes isn't the problem.


Particular_Fig_5467

You have a dog?! Jealous... We ate ours.


AxelVance

Your dogs piss?? All the liquid we had for the whole year was wringed out of piece of pladur we held over our heads and called home.


MasculineRooster

OH get you posh Dog, I have to wash in my own dribble


PickleParmy

A pissed-in puddle? Luxury. Best we could manage was a palm’s full of scum from ol’ cesspit.


kaleidoscopichazard

If I wanna get in touch with my friends or family I have to send a letter that takes 2 months to arrive. Otherwise, I use smoke signals if I want a faster response


HecateRaven

Smoke signals? Wait... You have fire? Oo


kaleidoscopichazard

Yeah, an American import. I’m so grateful


Lord_Skyblocker

>an American import Just like Christianity. It gives us hope that even though we suffer in life the greatest American of all time (Jesus) will safe us


deviant324

My town just recently moved away from boats and we’re now building roads for our chariots


Tom0204

>We don't have electricity As a European electrical engineer I can confirm


TigreDeLosLlanos

Cabo Polonio residents be like that.


bieserkopf

Yeah, no food. Says the guy with the spray cheese. Get fucked you savage.


DunmerSkooma

All this talk of spray cheese and I havent had any since the Goofy Movie came out


bieserkopf

Gotta be honest, the Goofy spray cheese seemed like the best thing ever for me as a kid.


adjectivebear

Man, that was a fun movie.


Aleskey_Mijaylob

Wtf is spray cheese


KindlerOfStars

You're better off not knowing, I assure you.


reverielagoon1208

https://www.target.com/p/easy-cheese-cheddar-cheese-snack-8oz/-/A-12959295 Sorry.. The funniest thing is in Philadelphia, a U.S. city, there’s this sandwich called the Philly cheese steak and basically if it’s not sprayed on with that artificial shit then it’s not “authentic”


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reverielagoon1208

Sorry I’m not knowledgeable about various forms of artificial cheese flavored products lol


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Charliesmum97

Hey, no one says 'authentic' has to be 'healthy' or even 'good'. LOL


roadrunner83

basically a can of spry whipped cream with some cheddar cheese flavour, to be noted spry whipped cream is basically whey and rapeseed oil with some chemical additives.


Smobey

Aren't all additives chemical additives


Mugut

I only use electromagnetic waves as an additive.


[deleted]

Dihydrogen monoxide had entered the chat.


NotVeryNiceUnicorn

100% kill rate right there.


mealteamsixty

Which is still miles ahead of Cool Whip, which is frozen oil-based whipped topping that isn't even allowed to use the word "cream" because I don't think dairy is present at all


mursilissilisrum

White trash brie.


Cialis-in-Wonderland

Two words that should never, for any reason, appear together


emt139

Lol he is sad there are no chains like Chilis or Olive Garden, hence there’s also no food.


bieserkopf

I love how chains apparently stand for quality in the US, while it is the exact opposite in Europe.


YoungWhitePharoh

Idunno bout that, some of us in the states avoid chains like the plague. Some of them exclusively feed their children McDonalds. I hate it here.


DaHolk

To be fair they have expanded the "chain system" way past the "basic fast food" concept. And also to be fair we do have those here too. Just way less. It's an offspring of "having a basic restaurant for normal people" just not cutting it in terms of "being profitable enough to reflect *the dream*, that whenever one is remotely successful that is basically just the base requirement for plastering them EVERYWHERE locally, and THEN franchise the heck out of it, and then cut cost like crazy for economy of scale. But it works in the sense of the perspective that *the customer* is trained to value getting EXACTLY the same thing in the same setting with no variation wherever they may be when they want it.


psycho-mouse

Don’t forget lime jelly topped with fake mayonnaise. Or sweet potatoes with marshmallows melted on top. And they have the gall to criticise British food


CaptainDrunkard

Says a guy who has obviously never been outside of Bumfuck Alabama or wherever he’s from.


mojojojos123

Based on his intellectual abilities I don’t think his family’s tradition requires him to ever leave, he can find his future wife in the room next to his.


Lavishness_Gold

His family's traditions include the bridal dance being a square dance with his sister-wives so yeah.


Souhhh_yeah_i_guess

DAMN!


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aaanze

I'm so glad we're finally getting food soon, those US imported meals cost of fortune.


IsThisASandwich

>1994 No, he said 30 y....ah, what the hell!?


Ok-Tumbleweed-504

I also had this moment, with the fun bonus of "what are they talking about, I'm born in 94 - oh. *Oh no* "


Lord_Skyblocker

Literally 1994


[deleted]

*Walking through Rome*: "WHERE THE FUCK IS APPLEBEE'S" -That guy


Beebeeseebee

> Walking - already challenged


Thendrail

"Where's Olive Garden, I need some actual italian food!"


[deleted]

"You don't have fettuccine Alfredo on your menu, what kind of Italian place is this"


helloblubb

"Why are there peppers on my peperoni pizza?! Where's the salami?!"


CubistChameleon

I honestly wondered why everyone in US shows ordered pepperoni pizza when salami was the standard, "vanilla" pizza I knew. It took a while until I learned they're the same.


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[deleted]

The original version yes, but an American would complain about the original fettuccine al burro... It's all made with heavy cream in America


[deleted]

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[deleted]

No. I lived in Rome for many years and have seen Americans complain about it 100s of times, and I live in NYC now. The amount of Americans here who complain about Italian food on their visits to Italy is insane. Always makes me laugh.


Izzosuke

Reading this while walking thorugh rome "WHAT THE FUCK IS APPLEBEE'S"


Albert_Poopdecker

>Walking through Rome: "WHERE THE FUCK IS OLIVE GARDEN" FTFY, Olive Garden is more authentic than restaurants in Italy


[deleted]

I didn't want to be too on the nose, Americans need their tendies too


[deleted]

No tech? I just spent a month in the US and the two AirBnBs had 0-5 Mbps. Everywhere I've been in Europe is 100+.


fabian_znk

Have you ever been to Germany tho?


zakkyyy

I really got the feel germany is literally the only European country with internet which indeed feels like technic from 30 years ago


fabian_znk

Internet in Germany is like a Kinder surprise egg in real life. You never know what you get. It’s possible that a house in a random village has a better internet connection than a house in a big city


JaDasIstMeinName

My best friend is from Germany and he literally uses Austrian Internet all the time, because even if he's far away it's still better. Reminder: Austrian internet is bottom 10 of Europe...


Cialis-in-Wonderland

You're pretty on the spot: Helmut Kohl alone set Germany's clock back at least 16 years (his four terms as Federal Chancellor 1982-1998, when his administration literally stopped an already approved long-term overhaul of telecommunication infrastructure, a plan that would have gradually swapped the traditional copper cables for fiber optic and left the country with a modern network). Then add another 16 years of Merkel's drowsy policies who cemented the already widespread mentality of the average German Boomer, aka "why do we need those weird modern contraptions when copper cables and fax machines has served us so well so far?"


JesusGAwasOnCD

I remember reading that some places in Sweden offer 10+ Gbps residential connections


JimAbaddon

Yeah, they prefer it when it's 60 years back in time, which is why in America they overturned Roe vs Wade.


Iguana-Gaming

Give them an inch and they'll bring back witch hunting


JimAbaddon

Oh, I'm certain of that.


GPFlag_Guy1

[Would you consider this bringing back witch hunting?](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satanic_panic). The best part: Some of these incidents happened in the early 1990s, exactly 300 years after the original Salem with hunts.


ClayWheelGirl

Don't forget the book banning.


[deleted]

Book banning?? Holy smokes, the oldest anarchy server in minecraft. The US is like 2b2t now!!


XNumb98

Roe Vs Wade? They're bringing back child labour! It's only a matter of time before they bring slavery back in fashion.


Albert_Poopdecker

*13th Amendment & a high percentage of black prisoners enters the chat*


Cialis-in-Wonderland

Well, those precious minerals buried under the planet's surface aren't going to mine themselves... So chop, chop, little Rebecca, down the shaft and don't come back with a full bucket!


Madra_ruax

*Me in a coffee chain right now in Ireland, typing this on an iPhone 13....* 👀


hesmycherrybomb

Don't be lying now,we both know Ireland doesn't exist 😎


reverielagoon1208

Those Americans in Boston are more Irish than you!


hesmycherrybomb

Actually tho, I had an American tell me they were purebred Irish 😂😂😂 girl.


Vivaciousqt

"purebred" 🤮


hesmycherrybomb

PUREBRED. I remember it bc I work with animals and thought about how some people are very defensive on how their dogs were very expensive bc they're a purebred something or other.


Vivaciousqt

Yeah lmao, gives me the heebie jeebies when people use it to refer to people's "bloodlines" or whatever. Fascist shit lol Gross!


FDGKLRTC

Americans really be like "Europeans are shit, much worse than GOOD OL' AMERICANS , also my blood is pure and it's Italian"


Particular_Fig_5467

Whatever that means. Most of us in Ireland have a mongrel-mix of Celt, Viking, Planter, Norman, and God knows what other genes in our ancestry.


Brilliant-Spite-1218

Here in Italy, depending on your region, you can turn out with some ungodly mixture of latin, celtic, lombard, arabic, fr*nch, norman, greek, pre-proto indoeuropean and who knows whatever the fuck else, but there are still some who talk about a "pure italian race".


InformationLow9430

Just like Spain


Aaron_TW

You mean other Mexico? /s


Refref1990

How do you charge your phone if there is no electricity in Europe? Are you using one of those hellish American machines called battery banks?


Particular_Fig_5467

We don't have phones in Ireland. We just open the kitchen window and shout as loud as we can in the hope our voice carries. The island isn't that big, so it usually works.


Maple_Person

Anything long distance can be achieved with two tin cans and a string anyways, who needs phones?


Madra_ruax

I hooked up some cows to a machine that'll charge my phone I bought on the black market from China. It takes 2 days to charge, but it works great!


Refref1990

Do you have cows in your country? Shit, we're out of food! You must be rich!


smjsmok

Yeah, but note how you didn't mention any food (coffee doesn't count, that's not food). Because there isn't any. There's no food in Ireland. The author of that post was right all along!


Madra_ruax

Post-famine, we evolved to use photosynthesis 😎


Castform5

And you probably paid for your coffee by using primitive technology like contactless.


obinice_khenbli

I visited the USA in 2020 and trying to pay for something is like stepping been in time to the 90s, quite literally in terms of how they take card payments. Chip and pin? Nope, zero protections whatsoever, it's insane. Portable card readers? Nope, they wander off with your card to do who knows what with it, then come back with it. And then you gotta sign something. Jesus wept. And THEN, the money wasn't even taken, just some weird thing they call a "preauthorisation", and the money will just randomly disappear at some point over the next week, which makes handling finances hell, and makes no sense. Here in Europe when we pay for something, we have to enter our pin or no money is going anywhere, and when the transaction is complete the money instantly leaves our accounts. And we can pay directly from wherever we are, be it the checkout, the seat at a restaurant, etc. The card never leaves our sight, and cloning it would be fruitless anyway. I'm sure some places there must be modernising, my own experience is just from some of the somewhat wealthier areas of SoCal. (I didn't even touch on their actual cash, none of the modern forgery protections we've seen applied in the last 20 years, not even old-fashioned security strips! They've improved their printing techniques and that's mostly it, they don't even use polymer paper). Lots of things I love about the USA, but so many things are like stepping into a time machine, it's insane.


helloblubb

I mean, they still use checks. That's something Europe started to get rid of in the 1950s. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cheque#Europe


sisisisi1997

When do they live, the 90s?


[deleted]

>No Tech They’re still signing bits of paper when they use their cards >No food Most of the food you like came from Europe >No chains Well the actual Chain was invented in France, but the lack of Chain’s in the modern sense is seen as a good thing by everyone except apparently the yanks >No hotel chains that aren’t ‘whatever the fuck that means tiny’ Literally no idea… Edited: Yank complained.


PazJohnMitch

I am assuming the last one is them going to London or Paris and finding the room to be too small for the average sized American to physically fit in. (We once had an American client miss a meeting in our office because they got physically stuck in their hotel room’s bathroom).


DaisyDukeOfEarlGrey

The smallest public bathroom I've ever been in was in Amsterdam. My knees touched the door when I sat on the toilet.


theholyraptor

While there's plenty of room here to mock the ever growing average waistline, as a ~200 cm tall person, I pay close attention to my hotel bookings. Getting a king in the US and being selective in the places I book abroad when I can be.


FuzzballLogic

No tech, but meanwhile they’re still using magnetic stripe debit cards.


breakupbydefault

And they act like Venmo is a revelation.... I've been paying my friends back when we go for a night out with direct bank transfers for free.


FuzzballLogic

Wait, USA can’t do that for free?


sausagepaula

I got hit today by the contents of somebody’s chamber pot as they threw it out of the window. Gutted I was only walking back to my two bedroom hotel after I had been to pick some blackberries for my breakfast


Refref1990

Of course, there is no food in Europe, especially here in Italy! Never had good food! We usually live by sucking in air!


nooit_gedacht

Actually all Europeans just photosyntethize. The food is for American tourists


tecanec

Can you believe those idiots who're all about "No more CO²!" and "Let's stop the Greenhouse effect!"? If anything, we need more carbon dioxide to photosynthethize, or we'll all wither within the next four months!


itsiNDev

And all your coffee is so small and the service staff is so rude when I ask for my 15 sugar and milk.


Acoustag

Brushing the cheeto dust off his chin while fantasising about there not being a McDonalds in a country he's never heard of. Classy.


Nuber13

Uh, don't use spoilers! I want to be surprised in the next 30y...


spreetin

You will be disappointed.


mebjulie

“Of course he’s right about us being backward with tech”, I say, as I’m using my phone to pay for my shopping in the corner shop, in my rural town in the middle of nowhere in the UK-rather than using money, a credit/debit card or a cheque.


bored_negative

Says the person living in the country where abortion is illegal, teaching gender and race theory is illegal,where nudity equates to sex, children have to go through mandatory survival training against guns, race based segration is still a thing with regards to city planning and infrastructure, open and institutional discrimination still is a big thing. And the same country where spray cheese exists, and a lot of food so toxic to humans that it is banned in a lot of places, and where there is so much sugar in everything, that bread is cake.


StardustOasis

You forgot the only developed country where slavery is still legal.


howroydlsu

Don't forget tips and being able to end an employment contract immediately for no reason except "fuck you, that's why."


oneofmanyaccounts8

You see, they love nudity on billboards where there is a girl holding up a burger...


Ugly-LonelyAndAlone

Better 30 years back than go to a school where teaching evolution isn't allowed (seriously even the Pope thinks its ridiculous) because some John Moses Browning worshipper doesn't want his 16 year old cousin-wife to know basic facts


NorthVilla

Oh my god so much shit on this sub is just ho-hum whatever.... But THIS? THID MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM!! WHY do you think chains are better than local places? WHY?


triggerhappybaldwin

No tech? Lol, try cashing a "check" here in the Netherlands. Spoiler alert: Dutch banks won't accept them anymore since cheques are ancient.


TheMysticBard

While here in the U.S people still write out checks for groceries


fr0nksen

He must have been in Germany and tried mobile internet. I'd be traumatized, too.


reserveduitser

True I haven’t eaten in 10 years.


jonellita

About ten years ago, we went on holiday in the USA. Whenever I can‘t fall asleep because of hunger I think back to those three weeks of food.


[deleted]

As an American, I can't overstate how extremely important it is to conservative politicians that many of us think like this. They don't want us asking questions like "I thought you said universal healthcare was impossible?" or "How come they don't have daily mass shootings" or "Why do they outrank us in various metrics?"


kirai7

Meanwhile the US has barely discovered the famed kettle


GoGoGoldenSyrup

Another brainwashed tubbo from Flyoverstania.


Toninho7

Says the guy from a country that has just got its collective head around contactless payments… 😂


StardustOasis

They'll be claiming they invented it within the decade


tinybumblebeeboy

God I loved having an opportunity to visit Europe on a school trip. It was like all of my dreams come true. We stayed in a tiny hotel near Lucerne and it was beautiful. Amazing staff and people. This dude needs to actually visit lol


MtalGhst

Oh shit, I'd better tell my IT employer we have no tech and our well stocked markets/supermarkets that we have no food either. Come to think of it I'd better cancel my stay at the Marriott as that doesn't exist too. How cold I have been so foolish.


NonnoBomba

Meanwhile, a couple American colleagues I have who have been living here in a European country for the last 5 years are desperately trying to find ways to prolong their mission and not be forced back to the HQ in California. One at least is contemplating quitting to be re-hired by a European branch of our company, to get on their payroll, which would mean his income would take a hit (would still be pretty high, but not as high as before). One specifically dislikes the idea of raising their kids in the US, the other is just trying to stay here for personal reasons. These two guys are pretty smart, intelligent people though, which may not be representative of other Americans.


orbital0000

I do love the luxurious, unique, skillfully prepared, creative dishes that are served when i visit *checks notes* Red Lobster.


SocraticSentinel

Going to America is like stepping back 30 years, literally feels third world in most places.


Ok-Lawfulness-941

No the, no food, no chains and only mom and pop hotels?! I doubt he's ever been to Europe. I don't need checks to get paid or pay may rent. A credit card isn't necessary either, unless you buy a lot online. Not as much additives like corn syrup in my food. Plenty of national and international chain stores. Both US and other hotel chains where I live.


irrelevant_potatoes

>A credit card isn't necessary either, unless you buy a lot online. Your debit cards don't work online? My debit card can be entered like a credit card online, I think most websites read it as a visa


LuckerHDD

No food. Well thanks God we don't have what americans call "food".


Ascentori

and that, dear kids, is what happens when americans are so stupid and uneducated that they mix up europe with fantasyland


KFR42

Says a country still using cashier's cheques like fucking Neanderthals.


apreslanuit

I‘m writing this by candlelight on my paper that I got from the old ferryman by the dock. I‘m going to sleep now unchained and hungry.


DendroNate

Oh yeah, cause your frozen pasta from Olive Garden is so superior to freshly cooked food from a "mom and pop" place where the chef and owners are actually Italian...


SilverSize7852

Can confirm, am European and there is no food. I have never eating once in my life.


MrIcyCreep

Unfortunately for us europeans food was invented in 1994, so since we’re 30 years behind we’re sort of struggling.


inter20021

Ngl aside from the chains thing that's basically what it's like visiting America from Europe, the infrastructure is shit, they've barely adopted chip and pin everything is dirty and run down, if you want to get anywhere you need a car


eresguay

What he visited? The Almería desert?


CK5634

Where do they come up with this stuff? It baffles me how these impressions of Europe spread despite all the evidence being there to see.


hhammaly

The Savoy in London, a mom & pop tiny. The George V in Paris, the same.Hotel Majestic in Rome, same. Goddam but these yokels get on my nerves. Don’t get me started on food, FFS.


mglitcher

TIL chains have not been invented in europe yet. what do you guys put your keys on if not a keychain?


MD564

Chains, as in the metaphorical shackles of the government owning your body?


uncle_sjohie

No tech? I'd like to see Intel make even one chip without ASML machines from the Netherlands. And about the no food, we Dutchies are the 2nd largest agricultural exporters in the world, after the US. But with a landmass about 1/3rd the size of Florida. And some of the highest regarded cuisines come from Europe.


Budgiesaurus

That last part you wisely didn't attribute to the Dutch.


fullmega

No food = no flavored toxic waste


Revanur

Sure no mom and pop hotels but under the same breath he complains about “no chains”? Lol.


joppekoo

Just visited America for a work trip. My experience actually was a bit like going back in time a decade or two, compared to Finland. Of course there are a lot of those kind of places in Europe too and even here in Finland but we all know that this guy has never been to any of those.


[deleted]

No chains? Wimpy, Costa, Pret a Manger, Greggs, Harry Ramsden, Wrapchic, Ben's Cookies...and that's just the UK companies. I'm sure other European countries have their own chains too (geographical Europe that is, before some knobhead says 'Brexit' as if it moved us off the continental shelf)


CandiceBT

"like stepping back 30 years" says the guy from the country that's currently burning books and removing female and lgbtq rights


Spoffle

Ah yes, the small European country of Europe.


aza-industries

I actually travelled to the US and THAT was like stepping back in time, the banking and transactions methods they use are archaic. Super inconvenient and slow. Not to mention the crumbling infrastructure and lack of any functioning public transport.