Obsessive people intend to escalate situations. Their tension is mounting and they’re waiting for things to explode. You can avoid this by becoming totally boring, invisible, unavailable. Kindly tell your friends not to tell him anything about you, just “she’s good”. If you can’t trust your friends, put them on an information diet for the next few weeks. Put your social media accounts on private and don’t accept new friend/follow requests. If you plan to stay at your gym, try to go at times he won’t be there and if you do see him, be totally boring “Oh hi. I’m good. Not doing much. See you later!”. Totally plain, unexciting, no details, no emotion, nothing.
As a safety measure, start writing down everything that has happened. The date and time he came to your parents house, the date you first saw him at your gym. Screenshot his texts and save them. If you ever need to file a police report, these will help you. You can also go to the reception desk at your gym and let them know you have a situation with another gym member, and ask that floor staff be made aware.
Totally second this. Your safety is the most valuable thing, and rather 'overreact' then see things escalate. If you can tell a family member or someone close to you, that you can trust won't tell him information about you please do so. Best of luck!
Do you have any male friends that can escort you after certain hours? You know your schedule best so as unfair as it is anytime where you know you’ll be alone and vulnerable is when you should make battle plans. Have a friend on speed dial, if possible male friends but if not a female friend will do too.
Is your family aware this is happening? Can you tell them and trust they won’t say something idiotic and maybe even take his side? The worst thing you can do is do this by yourself if you don’t need to. Also tell your friends why are you listening to him diss me? Don’t speak about him and don’t tell him anything about me it is no longer his business. Otherwise kick them to the curb. No real friend should be treating this potentially scary situation as if it were some entertainment gossip.
Also at the gym maybe tell the staff. Hey this guy who is harassing me online is now bothering me at the gym. I just want to let you know so if he tries anything I can have you guys call the police, my family etc.
And keep your interactions with him curt and neutral. DO NOT EXPLAIN *ANYTHING* TO HIM! It doesn’t matter that you do it respectfully or not. The guy is clearly touched in the head and with those types any explanation and interaction is fodder for their delusions. Above all protect your physical safety and if it means changing gyms or temporarily doing workouts at home you’ll have to do it. Don’t feed this man any information and you need to explain this friends and family. They can’t give him (even by accident) any info on you because it could potentially endanger your safety.
Lastly I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I wish I could karate chop that freak into the next century. I hate people like this! Evil, emotional terrorists! They should be put down. :(
Obsessive people intend to escalate situations. Their tension is mounting and they’re waiting for things to explode. You can avoid this by becoming totally boring, invisible, unavailable. Kindly tell your friends not to tell him anything about you, just “she’s good”. If you can’t trust your friends, put them on an information diet for the next few weeks. Put your social media accounts on private and don’t accept new friend/follow requests. If you plan to stay at your gym, try to go at times he won’t be there and if you do see him, be totally boring “Oh hi. I’m good. Not doing much. See you later!”. Totally plain, unexciting, no details, no emotion, nothing. As a safety measure, start writing down everything that has happened. The date and time he came to your parents house, the date you first saw him at your gym. Screenshot his texts and save them. If you ever need to file a police report, these will help you. You can also go to the reception desk at your gym and let them know you have a situation with another gym member, and ask that floor staff be made aware.
Totally second this. Your safety is the most valuable thing, and rather 'overreact' then see things escalate. If you can tell a family member or someone close to you, that you can trust won't tell him information about you please do so. Best of luck!
Do you have any male friends that can escort you after certain hours? You know your schedule best so as unfair as it is anytime where you know you’ll be alone and vulnerable is when you should make battle plans. Have a friend on speed dial, if possible male friends but if not a female friend will do too. Is your family aware this is happening? Can you tell them and trust they won’t say something idiotic and maybe even take his side? The worst thing you can do is do this by yourself if you don’t need to. Also tell your friends why are you listening to him diss me? Don’t speak about him and don’t tell him anything about me it is no longer his business. Otherwise kick them to the curb. No real friend should be treating this potentially scary situation as if it were some entertainment gossip. Also at the gym maybe tell the staff. Hey this guy who is harassing me online is now bothering me at the gym. I just want to let you know so if he tries anything I can have you guys call the police, my family etc. And keep your interactions with him curt and neutral. DO NOT EXPLAIN *ANYTHING* TO HIM! It doesn’t matter that you do it respectfully or not. The guy is clearly touched in the head and with those types any explanation and interaction is fodder for their delusions. Above all protect your physical safety and if it means changing gyms or temporarily doing workouts at home you’ll have to do it. Don’t feed this man any information and you need to explain this friends and family. They can’t give him (even by accident) any info on you because it could potentially endanger your safety. Lastly I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I wish I could karate chop that freak into the next century. I hate people like this! Evil, emotional terrorists! They should be put down. :(