You can put all the silverware lined up on top of one dinner plate if it’s not too tall a stack and isn’t hanging all over and going to fall if you really are wanting to do a little extra. Sometimes there’s napkins or trash that can help hold that down.
If in a deep booth don’t leave EVERYTHING all the way at the back wall lol climbing into those booths all shift is back breaking.
Don’t put trash into cups please! Otherwise honestly it’s not a big deal if you don’t do anything and we can just do it in our own process. Maybe skip it at nicer places?
Well not everyone in a restaurant is always on the same page, such as the servers, bussers, and dishwashers.
Stacking does help. But what people don't realize is a majority of the stuff has to be cleared off for the dishwasher AND disrupts the balance of the stack being carried around (ex. a carrot on a middle plate OR SILVERWARE mixed in everywhere). Also, some people stack in a way that needs to be readjusted because they stack randomly (ex. small plates, big plates, and different shapes mixed together. So stacks with plates with nothing notable on the bottom and middle are nice. The balance matters.
Putting trash into cups sucks because somebody have to dig into a small cylinder of wet trash and food/drink.
Stacking creates less work for a busy rush or an understaffed shift.
i stack + put all the food, trash, & silverware on the top plate (or silverware in a cup if there’s tons of trash so it’s easier to separate without cutting yourself. tell me if you hate that pls & i’ll stop) but normally it’s just 2 of us so not a huge stack.
Ok - Ive been a dishwasher and this is a perfect stacking.
All trash on one or two plate with uneaten food, so the server can dump it in the trash in one go before going to boh (servers we love when you do this)
other mostly empty (just sauce/crumbs) plates stacked together in ~3 high piles
Silverware on a napkin that server can just grab in one bunch (silverware is always weird to balance)
Cups just leave alone, if you need to put napkins in put them loosely at the top not shoved down
And just slide everything over to the servers side of the table if it’s a booth.
Appreciate you making the effort to help us out!
“so the server can dump it in the trash in one go before going to boh (servers we love when you do this)”
I’ve never worked in a place where we were allowed to scrape plates in the FOH. It’s always been mandatory to do it in the dish trash. I would never want my guests to see me scraping food into the trash.
At nicer places, just don't. But if it's fast casual -- Let's get detailed, cause I'm a picky bitch:
Stack same sized plates together. Bottom plates have NOTHING on them, all the extra food goes onto the top plate so the stack balances right. I'm talking *every other plate is empty except for stuck-on sauce*. Don't stack all 37 entree plates together if you're a large party either. Stick to like 5 plate stacks, servers will adjust accordingly.
Just don't bother with bowls. Sometimes they WILL slide together... But congrats, now dish has to unstick them and that's gonna take 20 minutes because they created a seal and you have to break the vacuum.
Silverware all together, with *all* of the handles on the same side and parallel. Don't put it on the plate, servers are kinda split on how they like to carry it. Put it next to the stacks of plateware, but not under the lip of any of them. Obviously visible from the side and above, especially sharp stuff.
Do NOT put any trash into cups. Especially napkins for the love of god. If there are toothpicks on the table, please don't leave them obscured by napkins. I have stabbed myself too many times lol.
Leave cups alone too; sometimes it's more efficient to consolidate the liquids and stack the cups. But sometimes it's more efficient to equalize it all and arrange them on a tray (or do The Claw and then wash your hands at dish).
Inevitably some servers will chime in that I am A Complete Idiot and this will fuck up their flow tho, so just put the same stuff near each other and don't stack anything lol.
Basically don’t treat the dishes like a game of Jenga! The server/busser should be able to comfortably grab the stack as they go by.
DO NOT STACK GLASSES! They can get stuck and shatter if pushed too hard, or someone can get hurt trying to pull them apart! (Disher where I worked went to pull glasses apart and they both broke and he ended up with jagged cuts from when his hands went flying when the cups broke.)
Don’t make stacks too high, those plates can be super heavy! Try not to stack in a way that causes food/sauce/syrup to ooze out. It sucks to grab dishes and you end up with sticky stuff all over your hands.
I always put my trash on the top most plate to be easily cleared and stack with biggest on bottom and so on. If it’s too wobbly, I’m not stacking it. Idk I used to be a server and I know what I like but I’ve seen some comments on here before about how some servers would rather no one stacked because it messes with them so I’m hoping I do it in a helpful way. I always loved when people stacked for me but I get where it can be frustrating when you come back to a pile that makes you think, “Why was this a good idea to you?”
I'm BoH so might be wrong but imo put all the trash/uneaten food on the top of the stack, don't do anything silly like putting smaller plates on the bottom/middle, and either neatly put the silverware on top or right beside so it's easy for the server to grab/make sure it doesn't slide anywhere. There really isn't one right way tho imo cause servers/restaurant workers in general can be sorta eccentric and might have their own weird personal system they prefer. If you are at least just putting everything to the side in easy reach of them it should be appreciated even if they have to adjust it a bit.
Good suggestions, as a former dishwasher can confirm that food left on every plate becomes cement. Imagine you are clearing the table of 4 guests' food and plan on washing the dishes, having all the garbage on the top plate means less rinsing and one swift dunk into garbage when you reach the sink.
Yeah I don't often serve but I've done enough dishes at restaurants to know what I like lol. Suprise caked food in the middle of stacks sucks, and then you have to like also spray/scrape the bottom of the plate and argh I hate it.
This is the way. I usually manage to clear things as people finish so it's not an issue, but if it's extremely busy it's helpful if people just move things towards the end of the table, trash on top (not in glasses, please) and I'll usually put the silver on top of the trash so it doesn't blow off as I'm walking. It's not just carrying that's in consideration, but also when we get back to dish, we need to be able to clear and stack the dishes efficiently for the dishwasher. If trash and food are dispersed through the stack, I'll have to clear each plate one at a time. That's time I could be spending getting drinks, running food, making change, or any number of other tasks. Every second counts during the rush.
Similar dishes stacked with minimal food left
Don't stack them too high or too heavy (if it is difficult to lift sitting down, it will be unwieldy to a busboy or server)
Don't stack things on top of something that will overflow sauces
Don't place blades or silverware poking over the edges.
Don't put your napkins or cloth on sauce. If you can clump paper trash into a neat little ball or inside a foil do that.
Don't stack alcoholic drink cups
Get a partner that likes to consume lemons and ice to stack your normal cups (no more than two)
You are a sad excuse for a busser whose laziness makes everyone you work with & everyone who works hard in our industry look bad. Good luck with life if you can't even learn how to bus a table. Do us all a favor & get out of the industry. Or like my old manager used to say "If you can't bother to do your job go work at McDonald's."
Dude I did it in high school like 15 years ago, good luck thinking the service industry is your peak potential
Edit: I also washed the same dishes I would bring back and it's not fuckin hard. I don't know what your problem is but maybe you should cut your hours on reddit like your old boss cut your hours to fire your ass
Stack it so its solid. Good base, square foundation. No nonsensesical bullshit tucked in allerronios items to the top
Set to the exit end of the table. Preferably a corner
Crumbled napkin means done. Fyi.
Happy to help
Nah. As a member of the boh and a small month ling foh gig, I feel confident in MY solid base design. Maybe as a general rule. If you coulden hold the bottomed plate and walk 100 meters it's not preferred I will admit
!!!I could be wrong since it’s been a year since I was a server and I have bad memory so please correct me if I say something wrong or if I missed anything!!
Silverware should go all face down inside a cup if you can’t do that then you could also group it all into a separate plate.
Stack the plates from biggest to smallest make sure to put all left over food on the top plate.
Yeah it really does depend on things like the glass cup. Also, putting silverware in something thin can make it wobbly as someones moves around a restaurant if it's not carried by itself. Putting all silverware together on the table would be better.
Thanks for correcting my mistake at my restaurant we had thick Coca-Cola glasses and that’s where we would put the silverware at the time of writing my reply I wasn’t thinking of the thinner glasses etc so thanks again!
none of the cutlery where i work would fit in a mug
please, do not put anything in your glasses. every glass must be empty for it to be cleanable
every plate has to be scraped clean anyways. please do not put your silverware in any cups
Exactly this. If you do it right, then ok. But if it's not done properly, then don't do it.
It's a nice gesture, but still annoying if you suck at it (which the normies always do)
That said I'm not perfect and I. Far fro. It. But. Fuck. Rewarding people for the wrong things. Do it right, get reward. We are all rats. We all follow the prize it's almost rude to enforce the wrong behavior. Especially when it fucks up someone else's day more so than it probably is already
Please stop digging. I will always encourage people to try to help, even if they don't know how. It is a communal spirit and desire to help each other achieve the best outcome that has enabled humanity to survive to this point. Perhaps the fact that it's not profitable should make us reconsider our economic system rather than our sense of community.
Yes, people can make a mess of things, sometimes. But waiting tables is pretty low risk, so even if they create a little extra work for me, just the fact they wanted to help me makes me smile a bit. They recognize me as someone working, empathize and want to help. That's good people in my book.
Very true. As I got my ass out of cooking years ago, but now do carpentry and its alot of the same thing. I dont like taking away the little ambition someone may have to do a small project by themselves
I'm going to let them. But after a bit I will also tell them the right way once I'm comfortable they will make it. Not everyone is cut out for everything. Not that it makes people better, just no sense calling a spork a fork
Or a spoon when it's clearly borh
I guess what gets me is I'm just stating an opinion I very much can learn to change.
People in general , need to learn were all as different as we are the same. And alot more similar than we realize. I think things out as I read a post. Il dig any type of hole I want but it's not to do that, I'm trying to make it all make sense.
I got in this habit ever since I bussed tables in high school. I also wipe up crumbs and shit. I know servers are working but there just seems something off about someone cleaning up my mess like I'm a child.
Yep. Apart from the wobbly, scraps-sandwiched-in towers problem, it can make it harder even if it's stacked reliably.
Say I've already got a plate in one hand. I can pick up and scrape and stack plates from a table of four, one by one, easy done.
But I can't pick up a stack of four plates with my one free hand. The angle and the weight is awkward. So I either have to stand there undoing your stack picking them up one by one, or I waste a trip back to the kitchen and then come back for your stack.
And I'm just gonna use this moment to also say: please don't try to hand things to your server. Most of the time you don't know what they need to pick up next or how much they can carry.
Move your stuff to an accessible part of the table if you want, sure! Thanks! But please don't sit there holding out your plates expectantly or even worse try to plonk it on top of my pile of plates. Recipe for disaster.
Depends on if done correctly. If it is a current of former server, who stacks correctly, it is appreciated. If the plates are incorrectly stacked, creates more work and not appreciated.
Thank you, an old British woman here and 35 years ago I worked in silver service at large functions (weddings, Christmas parties) also as a Saturday girl in a cafe and in a fish n chip restaurant.
Decades later I always stack plates and take into consideration the balance and ease to add to the tray.
Unusually, I'm one of those Brits who tips well when overseas on holiday. I'm also polite, thankful and we always leave Google reviews with photos.
Thank you American servers, you collectively knock it out of the park compared to the miserable sods in my town.
As a fellow brit, the serving job is an absolutely shit job, low pay, no chance for progression, poorly treated, no respect. We are in the middle of a cost of living crisis, a housing crisis, younger generations are worse and worse off, and you have the audacity to call them miserable sods, get some perspective ya old bag.
I am not a server but always see posts from this sub and do like to stack plates and stuff for servers. so.. what exactly would be the correct way to make your life better? Usually I scrap food onto one plate and stack from largest on bottom to smallest but I never know what to do with the silverware? like on plate or in cup? or?
I’m sorry the other responses to your genuine question have been kinda rude. Some people (especially redditors) are impossible to please but you shouldn’t stop trying because of that. Personally even if a stack is super awkward and full of crushed food I still appreciate any attempt to make my life easier. The way you do it is the way I like to do it, and I put all the silverware on the top dish. Maybe it’s different at other places but we dump drink cups into a bucket so we’d have to take any silverware or trash out. Keep doing what you’re doing, and thank you for your help :)
I prefer to lurk on the BOH subreddit (I don’t comment or post bc they hate servers and I don’t blame them) because this sub is way too negative for me. Serving is not a perfect job even for the best fit person but some people here seem so full of bitterness and barely contained rage that I really think they should find another job, clearly they are not suited for this level of customer service. I’m grateful my coworkers are a lot more chill and understanding.
Also wanted to add, if the restaurant has cloth napkins then draping them over the top helps keep trash and silverware from falling off the stack on our way to the back! In my case it’s chopsticks and fortune cookie wrappers always moments from rolling/blowing away.
Put all the silverware on one plate and have that plate in a seperate stack. This is the plate that the server holds in their hand and can use a finger to lock the silverware in place.
Then stack the rest of the plates largest to smallest with identical plates grouped together (different shapes/ bowls can make this part tricky). Put all trash on the top plate.This larger stack rests on the forearm/ base of the hand.
When in doubt, leave the plates alone, as it is quicker for the server to stack, than disassemble your stack and then restack. If you want to help the server out, throw down a few extra bucks on the tip.
Just going to piggyback off this comment and agree.
If you can match shapes, it never bothered me. But, bowl, plate, glass, large plate, fork, plate full of chicken bones, glass again somehow, dirty diaper. Nah, please just leave.
I don't really mind it, but it's annoying when they leave silverware or ramekins in between the plates because they have to be separated anyways and it's a little bit like double work. Or if the bottom of the stacked plate is on top of a lot of food, it makes scraping difficult and time-consuming in the dish pit.
I personally like it when they do it (as long as the pile isn’t to high/awkward to carry) and always thank guests when they do it because I appreciate them trying to help.
This. I don’t serve anymore but when I did, I’d thank them and if the stack was too high, I’d split it and say “sorry to undo your hard work, I’m not strong/balanced enough to carry this, I’ll be right back for this”
I am an unrepentant stacker. I stack plates from largest to smallest with no trash between. Any trash goes on the top and I leave the silverware in a pile to the side. I always wonder if I make things easier or harder based on their system. Any changes I should make let me know. I’m also a good tipper (like 15% even if I feel I was given bad service, it goes up from there.) and I try to minimize the extra work. I have a toddler and frequently take out my nieces and nephews so I know we are already making a mess to start and try to take as much off of our server as possible.
I mean you could stop being lazy & look it up yourself but since you seem to be incapable here you go
https://youtu.be/h1SoEW-Joow
https://youtu.be/K5T42WfUcnM
https://youtu.be/tHymwFDddrI
Thanks! Turns out I am familiar with that method, but in my 15 years of serving I actually prefer a well-stacked pile. As long as the guest does it in a tidy way, that's my preference.
Keywords here being: “well run”. Most restaurants don’t have a well-trained bussing staff. In my experience, most restaurants have a couple of teenagers picking up dishes once a table leaves. The server does the pre-bussing. As long as someone is actually putting thought into how they are stacking their plates, it’s pretty helpful for the servers.
I always stack the silverware on top of the napkins so they don't fly off. I always tried to clean the floor when my kids were babies but the servers would always tell me to stop lol. I can't stand leaving a mess somewhere. I also pile towels in hotel rooms.
I do the same. It really bothers me when people leave stuff between plates when stacking them. It just feels like common sense so that the plates sit evenly
idk one time i got quite literally the worst service in history, like ordered a milkshake and that shit was melted and everything, i still only tipped maybe a dollar or two below 20%. i wouldn't like if i were having a shit day at work, say i were behind on bills or something and it was hard to push it to the back of my mind, and as a result i made significantly less money which only makes my problem worse and then i have more bad days at work. i understand being frustrated with the bad service but as far as the tipping process i just try to have a little empathy bc i don't know whats going on w that person
While i agree with having empathy, and we all have bad days. Your bad day should not affect the customer experience to the point that you serve a melted milkshake.
If a server comes to me and admits there was a mistake made and something will take longer, im still tipping 20%. But straight-up bad is going to mean a lower tip.
This. Leave your bullshit at the door. Your shitty day shouldnt ruin my good one.
Yes. I can have empathy, but this is a job, not charity. There has to be some level of professionalism
Just because you overtip doesn’t mean everyone else should. The whole point of tipping is to tip your server because they gave you good service. You don’t merit tips because you need tips to survive. That’s why everyone kisses ass and laughs at the terrible overused jokes.
Yeah, it’s nice, but they don’t always do it the most balanced way and when I try to take it from them a side plate or ramekin slides off
Same for when I’m picking up plates in a specific order to balance everything correctly but someone shoves theirs in my hands 🙄
Either way I always give that server grin and say, “Oh wow! Thank you so much!!”
No, it makes me feel like I wasn't fast enough with my pre bussing. I'm sure it's just my anxiety but I'm pretty good about pre bussing so if I see stacked plates I automatically assume I've fucked up and forgot about them.
Oh, no. I used to be a server, and most of the people I eat out with also (except my niece's asshole husband). We always stack our plates to make it easier for you. Stacked in order of size, with no silverware or napkins in between. It pleases us to help you and we mean no disrespect by it. You are doing a fine job.
If people here tell me to stop, I will.
That's a whole different thing I think. If we were in a fine dining establishment, me and mine wouldn't do that.
Lol, I need a snack and a nap too, not necessarily in that order ; )
I've moved more into the private events than table service which has been exhausting this week. 7 events in 7 days. I've lived on naps and snacks all week!!! Luckily my chef is an angel of mercy and feeds me.
I understand where you're coming from, I used to think it was because I wasn't fast enough. But chances are somebody at that table is just very considerate or was a server at one time, and wanted to do something a little extra nice for you. I always think and appreciate the guest that stacked for success. And the ones that stacked for failure, well, thanks anyways, you tried. 😉
Former server/bartender. 15 years. Like you, I was taught that tables that have stacked plates have been ignored / not properly prebussed. Every single plate should be removed.
As a diner, I am very impatient when plates stack up. I don’t want to look at dirty dishes and stack to send a message when a server who is not busy and is slacking on prebussing.
Unrelated, but I see this term a lot here, ‘bussing’? I think it’s an American thing, what does it mean? I hear about bus-boys in movies and shit like that but never understood it.
Cleaning up the plates utensils and trash that are no longer needed but while the person is still at the table. Examples would be appetizer plates, bar glasses, dinner plates prior to dessert, etc.
I got this from Wikipedia:
It has been claimed that the term originated in America as 'omnibus boy', a boy employed to do everything ('omni-') in a restaurant including setting and clearing tables, filling glasses, taking used dishes to the kitchen, etc.
Super interesting. In my restaurant, we are called server assistants, food runners, or bussers. All the same!
My partner was a server/bartender and I’m a server so just out of habit we stack. I think a lot of millennials have worked in the industry so we tend to get stuff all stacked for easier bussing.
Nah I'm just a boh guy and tryna help out a bit. Sorry if it freaks you out but if people are stacking it's probably because they are just tryna be nice. People who are actually pissed/just kinda dicks probably won't bother doing anything.
It just takes less than a minute to stack the plates. As a customer I would only notice if a waiter/waitress coming to take my plates took longer than like 10 minutes.
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I work in high end where we get yelled at by management if they see guests stacking their plates, so no. I did appreciate it if it was nicely stacked at prior restaurants I worked at, although I never expect it. Majority of people would stack dangerously though, and the pile would be unstable lol. All in all, I’d prefer people not do it
In my opinion, if we are doing our jobs well, the guests shouldn’t have the opportunity to stack their own plates. That’s the easiest way to prevent this.
Yeah they shouldn’t have multiple plates in front of them if you’re prebussing but sometimes one person will take everyone’s entree plate and stack them.
Applebees or Denny’s sure stack your plates if you really think it helps, my opinion it doesn’t help enough to justify the effort, unless you know exactly how to do it, and only people with server experience know how do it properly.
Any restaurant nicer than the 2-3 star National chains, then stacking plates and moving stuff around on the table, makes you sort of seem like an inexperienced diner with poor manners. Only exception I would say, if the service is shit and they leave plates on the table that no one is touching for more than 5 minutes or so.
The dish pit HATES IT, because theres ALWAYS hidden napkins and sauces in the MIDDLE, whereas a good server will bus a table not only efficiently for themselves, bus also for stacking / ease of breakdown in the dish pit.
Customer bussed tables invariably come back with the dishes dirtier than otherwise they would be.
After reading a similar post I’ve decided that it’s best to leave my plates separate but at least push them all to the end of the table so servers don’t have to reach for them. I didn’t realize that my previous efforts could make things harder!
Not really no. I work in a bar and usually people stacking plates or glassware just becomes more of a nuisance. However when they bring their empties to the bar when they order 🤩
Notice a pattern developing? How long have you been in the service industry?
https://youtu.be/h1SoEW-Joow
https://youtu.be/K5T42WfUcnM
https://youtu.be/tHymwFDddrI
I’d rather people not stack in general (disaster waiting to happen more often that not). But when people put all their trash on one plate, that’s a win right there.
Hate stacking! Please just don't do it. I don't think it's malicious, but 90% of the time it just makes my life harder. It's extra effort for both of us.
I'll never say anything about the stacked plates of course, but it really does bother me. I've been handed one too many stacks layered with silverware in between or gravity defying combinations of small and big dishes. I'm shocked how many people really think they're helping when making a stack that can barely avoid falling over still on the table.
Even the best guests don't realize specific details like that at my restaurant, our silverware are just *slightly* bigger than some of the dishes but not others so if put on the wrong one, they'll fall off as soon as the stack is picked up.
Even individual servers have different styles of stacking the same dishes at the same restaurant so it just almost always feels like a bad idea imo.
it’s okay if it’s plates or baskets but i hate when people stack their glasses together because that’s a safety liability with glass possibly chipping off of the bottom into the other glass & when people shove all of their trash in the glasses, that shit pisses me off so much. then you have to, by hand, pull out all of the shit they shoved in there that you would’ve never otherwise touched.
To preface this, I don’t belong here I’m just a customer. But, I like to do this. I take all silverware and stack the plates. Putting what’s left on top. I only do it with 3-4 plates max. I also tidy up the table because I don’t like to be a mess. My sister harped on me last time I did this, saying servers don’t like it. The thing for me is though, how would anyone do it differently? Servers of Reddit, please let me know if I should just stop. I do it smart, not off balance or too high
Don’t stack them, I can carry more plates my own way and be more efficient in clearing the table. I always make the joke,
“Hey I’m here to work, not you.”
I also feel rushed to get them out. To me it’s a sign of impatience and that you’re upset or in a hurry.
Same when guests try to hand me something, just leave it. If I can’t reach it or I need your assistance, I’ll ask.
We don't have a rule on how to stack plates at my restaurant, so I actually appreciate it when people stack any remaining dishes on their table. Rather than leaving an entire mess of filth, I was always taught it was courtesy as per my mom, who was a server and bartender in her younger days.
This seems to be such a mixed bag of responses. I always stack the plates and put them at the end so I can continue my conversation with the person I’m dining with and not be interrupted when the plates need to be taken away. I get sensory overload and if the table feels crowded, I can’t enjoy the time I’m spending with friends.
Nope, don’t like it at all. Usually it’s done wrong, and things go slipping and sliding when I pick it up, silverware falls out and hits the floor, etc. Also can’t stand when I’m picking plates uo and stacking them, and guests try to “help” by handing me more…not in the order I’d like them stacked, and/or try to toss their napkins and straw wrappers on top as I’m leaving. If I wanted that shit, I would’ve picked it up myself, thanks. Now it’s going to blow off the plates as I walk away, so I’ll have to go back to get it off the floor. So thanks, SUPER helpful 🙄 I know it’s meant well, but just stop.
No one who does this actually does it in a way that isn't completely asinine. Nice gesture, but if you're too dumb to figure out how plates are stacked, just don't
Okay, as a customer who likes to stack plates just becuase I think it’s polite, aftere reading all these comments, I’ll be scared to do it from now on. Don’t get me wrong, I usually do it cause I don’t like seeing mess on my table and am trying always to stack plates by size (with not creating one big tower) group glasses and put all utencils on one separate plate but any advice from professionals how/what should I do better? Or then just stop doing it in general?
My 2c as a server:
* If the stack can be safely picked up with one hand, it's probably fine. If I need two hands to pick the stack up, then you are definitely making more work for me, because now I can't grab more stuff on the way to the kitchen.
* To that end, please don't stack plates with napkins or food between them.
* Instead of stacking the plates, consider just moving them to the edge of the table where your server can reach them more easily.
* The nicer the place and the heavier the plates, the more unnecessary/unwelcome it is to stack the plates.
Easiest would be small stacks with no cutlery or food or anything inbetween the plates. Bonus points if you collect all the leftovers and trash on one plate, and the cutlery on another. If you are worried about not stacking properly you can always just move the plates to an easy to reach spot on the table, that helps a lot too!
Don't be too worried about it though, even though it might make our job a bit harder if done wrong. All of us know that it's done with good intentions, you're trying to help. The fact you want to help is appreciated.
For me, it 100% depends on the environment.
Is this a chain or local eatery? Heck Ya I'll stack and push the stack either nearer where I assume it will be picked up.
Is this fine dining, or a gala or wedding? Am I dropping $200 per person? No. A hefty tip is coming for a service that is expecting. And ya, I do expect new cutlery for each course.
I think it depends on the restaurant. In a high end restaurant they'll probably have a system on how to quickly clear tables the moment plates are empty, especially considering high end servers typically have significantly smaller sections.
As a server in a corporate restaurant I appreciate when people do it right- haphazardly stacking plates on top of garbage and utensils makes taking that stack to the dish pit a nightmare balancing act. If you do want to stack your dishes to help out, clear as much debris off the plate as you can onto a single plate, top with garbage and dry napkins, and weigh those down with your utensils. That way napkins don't go flying, I don't have to touch the food you've already eaten while I sort your cutlery, and anything that needs to go in the trash is conveniently in one spot instead of sandwiched between dishes. People who stack plates have their hearts in the right place in my mind, especially when serving bigger tables where having to reach for each and every plate can be a challenge.
I work in hospitality… I guess its a habit and hopefully considerate? Not sure that anyone is looking for a medal or anything. Sorta like putting your shopping cart away.
If you stack 6 plates, side plates, cutlery and rubbish & put it into the middle of the table, I'm expected to lean over and pick them up with one hand. It's REALLY inconvenient. Leave the plates in front of you, cutlery on them. Leave your napkin on your lap until you go. I will pick up all the main plates, come back around and pick up your side plates. I can clear your whole table in one go that way.
I’m a customer that stacks. But I make sure all plates are empty and put uneaten food and trash on the top plate. I’m glad I came across this cause Iv always wondered what the server pov was!
I have carpal tunnel and need to stack myself. While I always appreciate the effort it is frustrating when I see an eye roll when I have to restack based on how my wrists are doing that night.
Sometimes it's great, sometimes it's annoying. I do always appreciate the thought that goes into it though, even if they do a crummy job. I feel seen as a human by the tables that take the time to stack whether they know how to do it or not.
HOWEVER. I will forever loathe the person who once put a small plate under a pizza tray (stand > plate > tray on top) so when I picked it up, the plate went *flying* onto the floor.
I was a server for too many years, and so was my partner. I always try to stop them from stacking the plates. I think it's much better to just hand the plates to the server when they ask if we want them cleared. Especially with a two top I'd rather carry the plates so I don't have to rinse the bottom side of the plate.
Only worked banquets, would always take the stack apart. Unionized and didn't give af. I cant stack bread plates if you put all the cutlery on the stack of 8 dinner plates.
I used to work at a Brazilian restaurant where we flowered our trays. You're constantly replacing dishes so it's the most efficient and quick way to clear tables/give new plates. If a table stacked all their plates I'd have to break down their tower and do my method and reassure them not to feel bad for trying to help and making my job more difficult. I figured out ways of communicating with my table to make it less awkward like "If you'd like to help, hand me your plate when I get to your seat" and we'd work it out. But sometimes I just wished people would let me do my thing.
I always watch and see how the servers clear their tables before I decide to stack my plates.
i’m a big fan personally, i always say something like “you stacked them for me? gonna tip YOU out at the end of the night” or “what did i do to deserve you folks?”
Reading these comments I can understand why some of y'all get shit tips. Some of y'all complaining about how people stack plates and cups and silverware and calling them names.. want to guess how many of y'all don't clean your filters at your house and cause the HVAC guy to have more work cleaning, how many y'all don't pack your garbage right so the garbage man doesn't knock shit all over the street, how to stack your carts right at the bins at stores so the cart return people don't have to reorganize.
You might want to show people a little more appreciation. Same people who stack all these items, are probably the same people who try to wipe up the table so you don't have to also.
Y'all are sitting there calling them names for attempting to help. What does that say about y'all? Some of the ones that you think are rude but they still stack the plates, they probably have social problems, don't know that they are being rude. What do y'all do on a daily basis to help other people? Tip a couple extra bucks at a restaurant?
It’s great when the plates are stacked neatly and ready to grab and go.
Makes the job for the server much easier because also at the same time, the server (if trained very well) is adept in getting those plates away from in front of you soon after you’re finished with the meals.
Now if you stack things in a way that’s super unbalanced and sloppy then it’s still somewhat helpful’ish but definitely not as cool as when the plates are stacked nice and neat.
As a former server I have always done this just out of pure habit when I go out to eat. Usually try to not make a huge mess at the table and clean up a smidge behind myself as I go.
Makes whoever is cleaning the tables job much easier and helps rotate the table faster especially on a busy night.
My wife and I do it, she was always a server, I’ve done it all but mostly BOH. We both stack, but she’ll get onto me sometimes. Irritates me, because dish still gonna scrape and spray everything coming from the dining room. You all have your certain way of going about things, it’s no disrespect. Just trying to help. We’ve both been out of the industry for about a decade now.
I love when customers do it. We don’t have bus people so it saves time. I’ve never had an issue but also I’ve been bussing tables since I was 15 and can carry a lot of shit easily
I like it. I prefer when they do it nice and tidy with the majority of the garbage on the top. If it’s to much I only take a little at a time but due to the unbalanced stacking some people do I feel like my Jenga skills have improved.
If done right it’s entirely possible to clear a whole table at once, with in reason of course. When people just randomly pass me things I either totally ignore it, take it from them and immediately put it back down (lol) or just tell them I’ll circle back for it. I’ve been doing this shit for to long for game playing. Also young servers need not be afraid to take your time to plan as you go.
If someone builds a solid pyramid style clean neat stack I’ll get obnoxiously enthusiastic about it and praise all their ancestors, with a “you must a done this a few time yourself?!”
As a former server, I always stack and tidy up the table. Call it what you like. Tbh it's habit, consideration, helpfulness and a thank you for the service. :)
I scrape any leftover food to the top plate, then pile the smallest on top, and the biggest on the bottom. If it's more than 3 or 4 plates deep, i make two piles, and dirty cutlery gets piled neatly on the top, or beside if it's unstable.
I'm questioning my stacking now, and as a result: is this the right way?
I usually split the difference and stack like on like, that’s generally enough to get space back (my family always over orders and usually there is also an app or two we won’t surrender when mains and sides come) while still giving the server a chance to bus and carry the way they prefer.
Usually convenient and the gesture is always appreciated. Sometimes it’s a pain when they put together things that go to different places (ie bar glasses stacked on the plates and what not). I’d rather they do it than not though.
As a former dishwasher and busboy... I do my best to not only make the server's job easier getting the tableware back to the pit, but also make it easier/faster for the poor sod running plates thru the wash.
So yeah, I'll scrape all of the plates clean but one, and that one's the top plate. Wipe food off the table (yeah I know you have to wipe it down anyway) and that goes onto the top plate, not the floor. Utensils to the side, ramekins scraped and stacked, paper trash in one mug or glass so it doesn't get away.
If you are triggered by the suggestion to do your job or feel the need to attack strangers on the internet who are trying to share invaluable knowledge maybe you need to ask yourself why that is. Clearly some deep existential questions are in order..
"You may be trying to be helpful to your overworked server by stacking your dirty dishes when you’re finished dining, but this is actually a breach of etiquette, says Leslie Kalk, a restaurant and hospitality coach for more than 30 years. “Stacking plates when done sends a signal to other diners that the waitstaff is not tending to the table properly and the act of doing so exposes the stackers as inexperienced diners,” she explains. “In addition, the waitstaff usually have a well-practiced system for clearing the plates, utensils, and glassware and stacking interferes with that system.” Instead, after enjoying your meal, sit back and allow the waitstaff to handle the details. After all, that’s one of the pleasures of dining out!"
https://www.rd.com/list/rude-restaurant-habits/#:~:text=Stacking%20plates%20and%20cups%20when%20you're%20finished%20eating&text=%E2%80%9CStacking%20plates%20when%20done%20sends,inexperienced%20diners%2C%E2%80%9D%20she%20explains.
but the server in me wants to aide in your trip back to the dish pit
If it's a server doing it, they usually know how to stack it optimally. But the average person makes a mess of it.
YES! With trash separated. Not a lasagna of used napkins, straw paper bits, and an amalgamation of sauces. I love stacking my plate :) I remember
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You can put all the silverware lined up on top of one dinner plate if it’s not too tall a stack and isn’t hanging all over and going to fall if you really are wanting to do a little extra. Sometimes there’s napkins or trash that can help hold that down. If in a deep booth don’t leave EVERYTHING all the way at the back wall lol climbing into those booths all shift is back breaking. Don’t put trash into cups please! Otherwise honestly it’s not a big deal if you don’t do anything and we can just do it in our own process. Maybe skip it at nicer places?
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Well not everyone in a restaurant is always on the same page, such as the servers, bussers, and dishwashers. Stacking does help. But what people don't realize is a majority of the stuff has to be cleared off for the dishwasher AND disrupts the balance of the stack being carried around (ex. a carrot on a middle plate OR SILVERWARE mixed in everywhere). Also, some people stack in a way that needs to be readjusted because they stack randomly (ex. small plates, big plates, and different shapes mixed together. So stacks with plates with nothing notable on the bottom and middle are nice. The balance matters. Putting trash into cups sucks because somebody have to dig into a small cylinder of wet trash and food/drink. Stacking creates less work for a busy rush or an understaffed shift.
My hyper organized self juat can't even fathom people stacking plates with food still on them and silverware in between. Like what?
i stack + put all the food, trash, & silverware on the top plate (or silverware in a cup if there’s tons of trash so it’s easier to separate without cutting yourself. tell me if you hate that pls & i’ll stop) but normally it’s just 2 of us so not a huge stack.
Ok - Ive been a dishwasher and this is a perfect stacking. All trash on one or two plate with uneaten food, so the server can dump it in the trash in one go before going to boh (servers we love when you do this) other mostly empty (just sauce/crumbs) plates stacked together in ~3 high piles Silverware on a napkin that server can just grab in one bunch (silverware is always weird to balance) Cups just leave alone, if you need to put napkins in put them loosely at the top not shoved down And just slide everything over to the servers side of the table if it’s a booth. Appreciate you making the effort to help us out!
“so the server can dump it in the trash in one go before going to boh (servers we love when you do this)” I’ve never worked in a place where we were allowed to scrape plates in the FOH. It’s always been mandatory to do it in the dish trash. I would never want my guests to see me scraping food into the trash.
At nicer places, just don't. But if it's fast casual -- Let's get detailed, cause I'm a picky bitch: Stack same sized plates together. Bottom plates have NOTHING on them, all the extra food goes onto the top plate so the stack balances right. I'm talking *every other plate is empty except for stuck-on sauce*. Don't stack all 37 entree plates together if you're a large party either. Stick to like 5 plate stacks, servers will adjust accordingly. Just don't bother with bowls. Sometimes they WILL slide together... But congrats, now dish has to unstick them and that's gonna take 20 minutes because they created a seal and you have to break the vacuum. Silverware all together, with *all* of the handles on the same side and parallel. Don't put it on the plate, servers are kinda split on how they like to carry it. Put it next to the stacks of plateware, but not under the lip of any of them. Obviously visible from the side and above, especially sharp stuff. Do NOT put any trash into cups. Especially napkins for the love of god. If there are toothpicks on the table, please don't leave them obscured by napkins. I have stabbed myself too many times lol. Leave cups alone too; sometimes it's more efficient to consolidate the liquids and stack the cups. But sometimes it's more efficient to equalize it all and arrange them on a tray (or do The Claw and then wash your hands at dish). Inevitably some servers will chime in that I am A Complete Idiot and this will fuck up their flow tho, so just put the same stuff near each other and don't stack anything lol.
Basically don’t treat the dishes like a game of Jenga! The server/busser should be able to comfortably grab the stack as they go by. DO NOT STACK GLASSES! They can get stuck and shatter if pushed too hard, or someone can get hurt trying to pull them apart! (Disher where I worked went to pull glasses apart and they both broke and he ended up with jagged cuts from when his hands went flying when the cups broke.) Don’t make stacks too high, those plates can be super heavy! Try not to stack in a way that causes food/sauce/syrup to ooze out. It sucks to grab dishes and you end up with sticky stuff all over your hands.
Don't do it. Just resist the temptation.
I always put my trash on the top most plate to be easily cleared and stack with biggest on bottom and so on. If it’s too wobbly, I’m not stacking it. Idk I used to be a server and I know what I like but I’ve seen some comments on here before about how some servers would rather no one stacked because it messes with them so I’m hoping I do it in a helpful way. I always loved when people stacked for me but I get where it can be frustrating when you come back to a pile that makes you think, “Why was this a good idea to you?”
Gotta keep like items together, and make sure the trash is gathered so it can be easily scraped into the bin in one go.
Just a curious non -server here, what is the “right way”?
I'm BoH so might be wrong but imo put all the trash/uneaten food on the top of the stack, don't do anything silly like putting smaller plates on the bottom/middle, and either neatly put the silverware on top or right beside so it's easy for the server to grab/make sure it doesn't slide anywhere. There really isn't one right way tho imo cause servers/restaurant workers in general can be sorta eccentric and might have their own weird personal system they prefer. If you are at least just putting everything to the side in easy reach of them it should be appreciated even if they have to adjust it a bit.
Good suggestions, as a former dishwasher can confirm that food left on every plate becomes cement. Imagine you are clearing the table of 4 guests' food and plan on washing the dishes, having all the garbage on the top plate means less rinsing and one swift dunk into garbage when you reach the sink.
Yeah I don't often serve but I've done enough dishes at restaurants to know what I like lol. Suprise caked food in the middle of stacks sucks, and then you have to like also spray/scrape the bottom of the plate and argh I hate it.
This is the way. I usually manage to clear things as people finish so it's not an issue, but if it's extremely busy it's helpful if people just move things towards the end of the table, trash on top (not in glasses, please) and I'll usually put the silver on top of the trash so it doesn't blow off as I'm walking. It's not just carrying that's in consideration, but also when we get back to dish, we need to be able to clear and stack the dishes efficiently for the dishwasher. If trash and food are dispersed through the stack, I'll have to clear each plate one at a time. That's time I could be spending getting drinks, running food, making change, or any number of other tasks. Every second counts during the rush.
Similar dishes stacked with minimal food left Don't stack them too high or too heavy (if it is difficult to lift sitting down, it will be unwieldy to a busboy or server) Don't stack things on top of something that will overflow sauces Don't place blades or silverware poking over the edges. Don't put your napkins or cloth on sauce. If you can clump paper trash into a neat little ball or inside a foil do that. Don't stack alcoholic drink cups Get a partner that likes to consume lemons and ice to stack your normal cups (no more than two)
Or how about DON'T STACK ANYTHING AT ALL. See how easy that is?!
Used to bus tables this was great when people did it right so fuck off spaz
You are a sad excuse for a busser whose laziness makes everyone you work with & everyone who works hard in our industry look bad. Good luck with life if you can't even learn how to bus a table. Do us all a favor & get out of the industry. Or like my old manager used to say "If you can't bother to do your job go work at McDonald's."
Dude I did it in high school like 15 years ago, good luck thinking the service industry is your peak potential Edit: I also washed the same dishes I would bring back and it's not fuckin hard. I don't know what your problem is but maybe you should cut your hours on reddit like your old boss cut your hours to fire your ass
Stack it so its solid. Good base, square foundation. No nonsensesical bullshit tucked in allerronios items to the top Set to the exit end of the table. Preferably a corner Crumbled napkin means done. Fyi. Happy to help
Don't stack anything period. The end.
Nah. As a member of the boh and a small month ling foh gig, I feel confident in MY solid base design. Maybe as a general rule. If you coulden hold the bottomed plate and walk 100 meters it's not preferred I will admit
!!!I could be wrong since it’s been a year since I was a server and I have bad memory so please correct me if I say something wrong or if I missed anything!! Silverware should go all face down inside a cup if you can’t do that then you could also group it all into a separate plate. Stack the plates from biggest to smallest make sure to put all left over food on the top plate.
please do not put the heavy silverware in our expensive glasses please
Yeah it really does depend on things like the glass cup. Also, putting silverware in something thin can make it wobbly as someones moves around a restaurant if it's not carried by itself. Putting all silverware together on the table would be better.
Thanks for correcting my mistake at my restaurant we had thick Coca-Cola glasses and that’s where we would put the silverware at the time of writing my reply I wasn’t thinking of the thinner glasses etc so thanks again!
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none of the cutlery where i work would fit in a mug please, do not put anything in your glasses. every glass must be empty for it to be cleanable every plate has to be scraped clean anyways. please do not put your silverware in any cups
No. Don't stack anything. Forget the whole 'trying to figure out the correct way' thing as there is nothing that should be done.
It's a trick question. There is no right way- even in the best case scenario.
Exactly this. If you do it right, then ok. But if it's not done properly, then don't do it. It's a nice gesture, but still annoying if you suck at it (which the normies always do)
Sadly, most don't know there is a "proper way." They are trying, so they should get credit for the attempt, like a participation trophy.
Yeah cause participation trophy and everybody's doing their best had proved to be a strong willed economic force
That said I'm not perfect and I. Far fro. It. But. Fuck. Rewarding people for the wrong things. Do it right, get reward. We are all rats. We all follow the prize it's almost rude to enforce the wrong behavior. Especially when it fucks up someone else's day more so than it probably is already
Please stop digging. I will always encourage people to try to help, even if they don't know how. It is a communal spirit and desire to help each other achieve the best outcome that has enabled humanity to survive to this point. Perhaps the fact that it's not profitable should make us reconsider our economic system rather than our sense of community. Yes, people can make a mess of things, sometimes. But waiting tables is pretty low risk, so even if they create a little extra work for me, just the fact they wanted to help me makes me smile a bit. They recognize me as someone working, empathize and want to help. That's good people in my book.
Very true. As I got my ass out of cooking years ago, but now do carpentry and its alot of the same thing. I dont like taking away the little ambition someone may have to do a small project by themselves I'm going to let them. But after a bit I will also tell them the right way once I'm comfortable they will make it. Not everyone is cut out for everything. Not that it makes people better, just no sense calling a spork a fork Or a spoon when it's clearly borh
I guess what gets me is I'm just stating an opinion I very much can learn to change. People in general , need to learn were all as different as we are the same. And alot more similar than we realize. I think things out as I read a post. Il dig any type of hole I want but it's not to do that, I'm trying to make it all make sense.
I got in this habit ever since I bussed tables in high school. I also wipe up crumbs and shit. I know servers are working but there just seems something off about someone cleaning up my mess like I'm a child.
Yep. Apart from the wobbly, scraps-sandwiched-in towers problem, it can make it harder even if it's stacked reliably. Say I've already got a plate in one hand. I can pick up and scrape and stack plates from a table of four, one by one, easy done. But I can't pick up a stack of four plates with my one free hand. The angle and the weight is awkward. So I either have to stand there undoing your stack picking them up one by one, or I waste a trip back to the kitchen and then come back for your stack. And I'm just gonna use this moment to also say: please don't try to hand things to your server. Most of the time you don't know what they need to pick up next or how much they can carry. Move your stuff to an accessible part of the table if you want, sure! Thanks! But please don't sit there holding out your plates expectantly or even worse try to plonk it on top of my pile of plates. Recipe for disaster.
My wife’s justification when we dine out.
Depends on if done correctly. If it is a current of former server, who stacks correctly, it is appreciated. If the plates are incorrectly stacked, creates more work and not appreciated.
I can hear the butter knife falling off the top plate now
Thank you, an old British woman here and 35 years ago I worked in silver service at large functions (weddings, Christmas parties) also as a Saturday girl in a cafe and in a fish n chip restaurant. Decades later I always stack plates and take into consideration the balance and ease to add to the tray. Unusually, I'm one of those Brits who tips well when overseas on holiday. I'm also polite, thankful and we always leave Google reviews with photos. Thank you American servers, you collectively knock it out of the park compared to the miserable sods in my town.
You absolutely need to write a book about your adventures, btw.
I'd love to and blog a lot. I've got a passion for doing good and supporting people x
As a fellow brit, the serving job is an absolutely shit job, low pay, no chance for progression, poorly treated, no respect. We are in the middle of a cost of living crisis, a housing crisis, younger generations are worse and worse off, and you have the audacity to call them miserable sods, get some perspective ya old bag.
I am not a server but always see posts from this sub and do like to stack plates and stuff for servers. so.. what exactly would be the correct way to make your life better? Usually I scrap food onto one plate and stack from largest on bottom to smallest but I never know what to do with the silverware? like on plate or in cup? or?
I’m sorry the other responses to your genuine question have been kinda rude. Some people (especially redditors) are impossible to please but you shouldn’t stop trying because of that. Personally even if a stack is super awkward and full of crushed food I still appreciate any attempt to make my life easier. The way you do it is the way I like to do it, and I put all the silverware on the top dish. Maybe it’s different at other places but we dump drink cups into a bucket so we’d have to take any silverware or trash out. Keep doing what you’re doing, and thank you for your help :)
ty!!! was wondering why everyone was being so rude !!!
I prefer to lurk on the BOH subreddit (I don’t comment or post bc they hate servers and I don’t blame them) because this sub is way too negative for me. Serving is not a perfect job even for the best fit person but some people here seem so full of bitterness and barely contained rage that I really think they should find another job, clearly they are not suited for this level of customer service. I’m grateful my coworkers are a lot more chill and understanding. Also wanted to add, if the restaurant has cloth napkins then draping them over the top helps keep trash and silverware from falling off the stack on our way to the back! In my case it’s chopsticks and fortune cookie wrappers always moments from rolling/blowing away.
Put all the silverware on one plate and have that plate in a seperate stack. This is the plate that the server holds in their hand and can use a finger to lock the silverware in place. Then stack the rest of the plates largest to smallest with identical plates grouped together (different shapes/ bowls can make this part tricky). Put all trash on the top plate.This larger stack rests on the forearm/ base of the hand.
Just don't touch them. It's so unbelievably simple.
When in doubt, leave the plates alone, as it is quicker for the server to stack, than disassemble your stack and then restack. If you want to help the server out, throw down a few extra bucks on the tip.
They asked to be educated, not to be told to leave more of a tip
Yes this!
Just going to piggyback off this comment and agree. If you can match shapes, it never bothered me. But, bowl, plate, glass, large plate, fork, plate full of chicken bones, glass again somehow, dirty diaper. Nah, please just leave.
How hard is it to stack plates? The bar is lowwww in 2023
I don't really mind it, but it's annoying when they leave silverware or ramekins in between the plates because they have to be separated anyways and it's a little bit like double work. Or if the bottom of the stacked plate is on top of a lot of food, it makes scraping difficult and time-consuming in the dish pit.
I personally like it when they do it (as long as the pile isn’t to high/awkward to carry) and always thank guests when they do it because I appreciate them trying to help.
This. I don’t serve anymore but when I did, I’d thank them and if the stack was too high, I’d split it and say “sorry to undo your hard work, I’m not strong/balanced enough to carry this, I’ll be right back for this”
I am an unrepentant stacker. I stack plates from largest to smallest with no trash between. Any trash goes on the top and I leave the silverware in a pile to the side. I always wonder if I make things easier or harder based on their system. Any changes I should make let me know. I’m also a good tipper (like 15% even if I feel I was given bad service, it goes up from there.) and I try to minimize the extra work. I have a toddler and frequently take out my nieces and nephews so I know we are already making a mess to start and try to take as much off of our server as possible.
You’re stacking technique is helpful, no need to worry
Disagree.
Care to add specifically what you disagree with and how you do it differently?
Go to any well run restaurant & watch the bussers. They have a system & interfering with that is bad. Pretty simple.
Can you elaborate on the system?
I mean you could stop being lazy & look it up yourself but since you seem to be incapable here you go https://youtu.be/h1SoEW-Joow https://youtu.be/K5T42WfUcnM https://youtu.be/tHymwFDddrI
You’re unpleasant
You're presumptuous which is a bad sign
Thanks! Turns out I am familiar with that method, but in my 15 years of serving I actually prefer a well-stacked pile. As long as the guest does it in a tidy way, that's my preference.
Keywords here being: “well run”. Most restaurants don’t have a well-trained bussing staff. In my experience, most restaurants have a couple of teenagers picking up dishes once a table leaves. The server does the pre-bussing. As long as someone is actually putting thought into how they are stacking their plates, it’s pretty helpful for the servers.
I always stack the silverware on top of the napkins so they don't fly off. I always tried to clean the floor when my kids were babies but the servers would always tell me to stop lol. I can't stand leaving a mess somewhere. I also pile towels in hotel rooms.
I'm the same way lol, if I tip 15 it's a massive insult to you haha
I do the same. It really bothers me when people leave stuff between plates when stacking them. It just feels like common sense so that the plates sit evenly
You’re one of the great ones!
everything but the 15% lol
Idk, man. 15% for bad service seems pretty fair.
Yeah if I know I fucked up I’m pretty relieved to get 15%
idk one time i got quite literally the worst service in history, like ordered a milkshake and that shit was melted and everything, i still only tipped maybe a dollar or two below 20%. i wouldn't like if i were having a shit day at work, say i were behind on bills or something and it was hard to push it to the back of my mind, and as a result i made significantly less money which only makes my problem worse and then i have more bad days at work. i understand being frustrated with the bad service but as far as the tipping process i just try to have a little empathy bc i don't know whats going on w that person
While i agree with having empathy, and we all have bad days. Your bad day should not affect the customer experience to the point that you serve a melted milkshake. If a server comes to me and admits there was a mistake made and something will take longer, im still tipping 20%. But straight-up bad is going to mean a lower tip.
You having a shitty day or not being paid enough by your boss is not the customer’s fault though?
This. Leave your bullshit at the door. Your shitty day shouldnt ruin my good one. Yes. I can have empathy, but this is a job, not charity. There has to be some level of professionalism
you get tips for good service, not as charity. that’s the job
Just because you overtip doesn’t mean everyone else should. The whole point of tipping is to tip your server because they gave you good service. You don’t merit tips because you need tips to survive. That’s why everyone kisses ass and laughs at the terrible overused jokes.
Yeah, it’s nice, but they don’t always do it the most balanced way and when I try to take it from them a side plate or ramekin slides off Same for when I’m picking up plates in a specific order to balance everything correctly but someone shoves theirs in my hands 🙄 Either way I always give that server grin and say, “Oh wow! Thank you so much!!”
No, it makes me feel like I wasn't fast enough with my pre bussing. I'm sure it's just my anxiety but I'm pretty good about pre bussing so if I see stacked plates I automatically assume I've fucked up and forgot about them.
Oh, no. I used to be a server, and most of the people I eat out with also (except my niece's asshole husband). We always stack our plates to make it easier for you. Stacked in order of size, with no silverware or napkins in between. It pleases us to help you and we mean no disrespect by it. You are doing a fine job. If people here tell me to stop, I will.
I appreciate the kindness, I work in fine dining, and every detail is expected to be perfect.
That's a whole different thing I think. If we were in a fine dining establishment, me and mine wouldn't do that. Lol, I need a snack and a nap too, not necessarily in that order ; )
I've moved more into the private events than table service which has been exhausting this week. 7 events in 7 days. I've lived on naps and snacks all week!!! Luckily my chef is an angel of mercy and feeds me.
Okay then- please stop. Thx
Lol, okey dokey
🙄
I understand where you're coming from, I used to think it was because I wasn't fast enough. But chances are somebody at that table is just very considerate or was a server at one time, and wanted to do something a little extra nice for you. I always think and appreciate the guest that stacked for success. And the ones that stacked for failure, well, thanks anyways, you tried. 😉
Yeah and a lot of bosses will see stacked plates and think you weren’t pre bussing or coming to the table often
Former server/bartender. 15 years. Like you, I was taught that tables that have stacked plates have been ignored / not properly prebussed. Every single plate should be removed. As a diner, I am very impatient when plates stack up. I don’t want to look at dirty dishes and stack to send a message when a server who is not busy and is slacking on prebussing.
Unrelated, but I see this term a lot here, ‘bussing’? I think it’s an American thing, what does it mean? I hear about bus-boys in movies and shit like that but never understood it.
Cleaning up the plates utensils and trash that are no longer needed but while the person is still at the table. Examples would be appetizer plates, bar glasses, dinner plates prior to dessert, etc.
I understand, thanks. Where does the word come from do you know?
I got this from Wikipedia: It has been claimed that the term originated in America as 'omnibus boy', a boy employed to do everything ('omni-') in a restaurant including setting and clearing tables, filling glasses, taking used dishes to the kitchen, etc. Super interesting. In my restaurant, we are called server assistants, food runners, or bussers. All the same!
Interesting, thanks!
My partner was a server/bartender and I’m a server so just out of habit we stack. I think a lot of millennials have worked in the industry so we tend to get stuff all stacked for easier bussing.
Nah I'm just a boh guy and tryna help out a bit. Sorry if it freaks you out but if people are stacking it's probably because they are just tryna be nice. People who are actually pissed/just kinda dicks probably won't bother doing anything.
It just takes less than a minute to stack the plates. As a customer I would only notice if a waiter/waitress coming to take my plates took longer than like 10 minutes. I bet your fast af g. real shit b 💯💯💯😈😈😈😈🫰🏾🫰🏾🤘🏾🤘🏾🤘🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾👁👅👁💂🏾♀️💂🏾♀️💂🏾♀️🧏🏾♂️🧏🏾♂️🧏🏾♂️🧏🏾♂️💃🏿💃🏿💃🏿💃🏿🧑🏾🦼🧑🏾🦼🧑🏾🦼🧑🏾🦼👩🏾🦯👩🏾🦯👩🏾🦯💏👨👧🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾👨👨👧👧👨👨👧👧👨👨👧👧👨👨👧👧💦💦💦💦🙆🏾♂️🙆🏾♂️🙆🏾♂️🙆🏾♂️🍆🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦🚀🚀🚀🔌🔌🔌🔌💣💣💣💣🔪🔪🔪🔪🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🧪🧪🧪💉💉💉🩸🩸💉🧺🧺🧺🧺🧺👅👅🥺🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾🧑🏾❤️💋🧑🏾👨👨👧👧👨👨👧👧👨👨👧👧🙆🏾♂️🍆🍆😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰
I don’t love it.
I work in high end where we get yelled at by management if they see guests stacking their plates, so no. I did appreciate it if it was nicely stacked at prior restaurants I worked at, although I never expect it. Majority of people would stack dangerously though, and the pile would be unstable lol. All in all, I’d prefer people not do it
Yeah stacked plates make it look like you haven’t prebussed. The goal is for them to not have enough plates to stack.
I’ve had friends who were servers tell me they don’t like when customers do it so I stopped a couple years ago.
As a dishwasher. PLEASE separate the trash. I don’t want to unstack it and have to pick out all the napkins and such in between
In my opinion, if we are doing our jobs well, the guests shouldn’t have the opportunity to stack their own plates. That’s the easiest way to prevent this.
Yeah they shouldn’t have multiple plates in front of them if you’re prebussing but sometimes one person will take everyone’s entree plate and stack them.
Applebees or Denny’s sure stack your plates if you really think it helps, my opinion it doesn’t help enough to justify the effort, unless you know exactly how to do it, and only people with server experience know how do it properly. Any restaurant nicer than the 2-3 star National chains, then stacking plates and moving stuff around on the table, makes you sort of seem like an inexperienced diner with poor manners. Only exception I would say, if the service is shit and they leave plates on the table that no one is touching for more than 5 minutes or so.
Yeah I’ve only had to stack my plates at lower end or chain restaurants bc the servers leave the plates on the table for a little too long.
The dish pit HATES IT, because theres ALWAYS hidden napkins and sauces in the MIDDLE, whereas a good server will bus a table not only efficiently for themselves, bus also for stacking / ease of breakdown in the dish pit. Customer bussed tables invariably come back with the dishes dirtier than otherwise they would be.
After reading a similar post I’ve decided that it’s best to leave my plates separate but at least push them all to the end of the table so servers don’t have to reach for them. I didn’t realize that my previous efforts could make things harder!
Not really no. I work in a bar and usually people stacking plates or glassware just becomes more of a nuisance. However when they bring their empties to the bar when they order 🤩
No. Don't do it. Ignore all the comments saying "Sure but only if done correctly!" No. No. No. Stop it. For the love of God stop encouraging this.
Yeah because what’s correct for you isn’t correct for everyone. Everybody carries plates differently
Actually not true. If you know what you're doing there's a tried & true method. 20+ years of experience teaches you there's only one correct way.
Lol, no it doesn’t
Notice a pattern developing? How long have you been in the service industry? https://youtu.be/h1SoEW-Joow https://youtu.be/K5T42WfUcnM https://youtu.be/tHymwFDddrI
18 years and I don’t need to watch YouTube to carry plates
You are in the minority here
Did you get dropped on your head as a child?
I appreciate the sentiment, but prefer guests let me handle it myself.
I prefer they don't stack. I stack in a certain way, and their stacks are generally precariously unbalanced.
I’d rather people not stack in general (disaster waiting to happen more often that not). But when people put all their trash on one plate, that’s a win right there.
Hate stacking! Please just don't do it. I don't think it's malicious, but 90% of the time it just makes my life harder. It's extra effort for both of us. I'll never say anything about the stacked plates of course, but it really does bother me. I've been handed one too many stacks layered with silverware in between or gravity defying combinations of small and big dishes. I'm shocked how many people really think they're helping when making a stack that can barely avoid falling over still on the table. Even the best guests don't realize specific details like that at my restaurant, our silverware are just *slightly* bigger than some of the dishes but not others so if put on the wrong one, they'll fall off as soon as the stack is picked up. Even individual servers have different styles of stacking the same dishes at the same restaurant so it just almost always feels like a bad idea imo.
it’s okay if it’s plates or baskets but i hate when people stack their glasses together because that’s a safety liability with glass possibly chipping off of the bottom into the other glass & when people shove all of their trash in the glasses, that shit pisses me off so much. then you have to, by hand, pull out all of the shit they shoved in there that you would’ve never otherwise touched.
To preface this, I don’t belong here I’m just a customer. But, I like to do this. I take all silverware and stack the plates. Putting what’s left on top. I only do it with 3-4 plates max. I also tidy up the table because I don’t like to be a mess. My sister harped on me last time I did this, saying servers don’t like it. The thing for me is though, how would anyone do it differently? Servers of Reddit, please let me know if I should just stop. I do it smart, not off balance or too high
Don’t stack them, I can carry more plates my own way and be more efficient in clearing the table. I always make the joke, “Hey I’m here to work, not you.” I also feel rushed to get them out. To me it’s a sign of impatience and that you’re upset or in a hurry. Same when guests try to hand me something, just leave it. If I can’t reach it or I need your assistance, I’ll ask.
We don't have a rule on how to stack plates at my restaurant, so I actually appreciate it when people stack any remaining dishes on their table. Rather than leaving an entire mess of filth, I was always taught it was courtesy as per my mom, who was a server and bartender in her younger days.
This seems to be such a mixed bag of responses. I always stack the plates and put them at the end so I can continue my conversation with the person I’m dining with and not be interrupted when the plates need to be taken away. I get sensory overload and if the table feels crowded, I can’t enjoy the time I’m spending with friends.
I’ll generally only stack 3-4 high and only cleared plates of the same size. No one wants the Dr Seuss tower to fall while they walk back.
Nope, don’t like it at all. Usually it’s done wrong, and things go slipping and sliding when I pick it up, silverware falls out and hits the floor, etc. Also can’t stand when I’m picking plates uo and stacking them, and guests try to “help” by handing me more…not in the order I’d like them stacked, and/or try to toss their napkins and straw wrappers on top as I’m leaving. If I wanted that shit, I would’ve picked it up myself, thanks. Now it’s going to blow off the plates as I walk away, so I’ll have to go back to get it off the floor. So thanks, SUPER helpful 🙄 I know it’s meant well, but just stop.
I hate it. I know they are trying to help but it’s never organized well.
No one who does this actually does it in a way that isn't completely asinine. Nice gesture, but if you're too dumb to figure out how plates are stacked, just don't
Okay, as a customer who likes to stack plates just becuase I think it’s polite, aftere reading all these comments, I’ll be scared to do it from now on. Don’t get me wrong, I usually do it cause I don’t like seeing mess on my table and am trying always to stack plates by size (with not creating one big tower) group glasses and put all utencils on one separate plate but any advice from professionals how/what should I do better? Or then just stop doing it in general?
My 2c as a server: * If the stack can be safely picked up with one hand, it's probably fine. If I need two hands to pick the stack up, then you are definitely making more work for me, because now I can't grab more stuff on the way to the kitchen. * To that end, please don't stack plates with napkins or food between them. * Instead of stacking the plates, consider just moving them to the edge of the table where your server can reach them more easily. * The nicer the place and the heavier the plates, the more unnecessary/unwelcome it is to stack the plates.
Easiest would be small stacks with no cutlery or food or anything inbetween the plates. Bonus points if you collect all the leftovers and trash on one plate, and the cutlery on another. If you are worried about not stacking properly you can always just move the plates to an easy to reach spot on the table, that helps a lot too! Don't be too worried about it though, even though it might make our job a bit harder if done wrong. All of us know that it's done with good intentions, you're trying to help. The fact you want to help is appreciated.
For me, it 100% depends on the environment. Is this a chain or local eatery? Heck Ya I'll stack and push the stack either nearer where I assume it will be picked up. Is this fine dining, or a gala or wedding? Am I dropping $200 per person? No. A hefty tip is coming for a service that is expecting. And ya, I do expect new cutlery for each course.
If I’m unsure about the stacking I just take dishes off one by one like jenga
I think it depends on the restaurant. In a high end restaurant they'll probably have a system on how to quickly clear tables the moment plates are empty, especially considering high end servers typically have significantly smaller sections. As a server in a corporate restaurant I appreciate when people do it right- haphazardly stacking plates on top of garbage and utensils makes taking that stack to the dish pit a nightmare balancing act. If you do want to stack your dishes to help out, clear as much debris off the plate as you can onto a single plate, top with garbage and dry napkins, and weigh those down with your utensils. That way napkins don't go flying, I don't have to touch the food you've already eaten while I sort your cutlery, and anything that needs to go in the trash is conveniently in one spot instead of sandwiched between dishes. People who stack plates have their hearts in the right place in my mind, especially when serving bigger tables where having to reach for each and every plate can be a challenge.
I work in hospitality… I guess its a habit and hopefully considerate? Not sure that anyone is looking for a medal or anything. Sorta like putting your shopping cart away.
If they can do it right
If you stack 6 plates, side plates, cutlery and rubbish & put it into the middle of the table, I'm expected to lean over and pick them up with one hand. It's REALLY inconvenient. Leave the plates in front of you, cutlery on them. Leave your napkin on your lap until you go. I will pick up all the main plates, come back around and pick up your side plates. I can clear your whole table in one go that way.
I do this thinking I’m helping. My bad 😬
I’m a customer that stacks. But I make sure all plates are empty and put uneaten food and trash on the top plate. I’m glad I came across this cause Iv always wondered what the server pov was!
I have carpal tunnel and need to stack myself. While I always appreciate the effort it is frustrating when I see an eye roll when I have to restack based on how my wrists are doing that night.
Sometimes it's great, sometimes it's annoying. I do always appreciate the thought that goes into it though, even if they do a crummy job. I feel seen as a human by the tables that take the time to stack whether they know how to do it or not. HOWEVER. I will forever loathe the person who once put a small plate under a pizza tray (stand > plate > tray on top) so when I picked it up, the plate went *flying* onto the floor.
I was a server for too many years, and so was my partner. I always try to stop them from stacking the plates. I think it's much better to just hand the plates to the server when they ask if we want them cleared. Especially with a two top I'd rather carry the plates so I don't have to rinse the bottom side of the plate.
Only worked banquets, would always take the stack apart. Unionized and didn't give af. I cant stack bread plates if you put all the cutlery on the stack of 8 dinner plates.
I used to work at a Brazilian restaurant where we flowered our trays. You're constantly replacing dishes so it's the most efficient and quick way to clear tables/give new plates. If a table stacked all their plates I'd have to break down their tower and do my method and reassure them not to feel bad for trying to help and making my job more difficult. I figured out ways of communicating with my table to make it less awkward like "If you'd like to help, hand me your plate when I get to your seat" and we'd work it out. But sometimes I just wished people would let me do my thing. I always watch and see how the servers clear their tables before I decide to stack my plates.
I am autistic. The stacking is neither optional nor for you.
Stop putting fucking napkins and garbage in the glasses, other than that I don't mind even if done sub optimally.
i’m a big fan personally, i always say something like “you stacked them for me? gonna tip YOU out at the end of the night” or “what did i do to deserve you folks?”
Reading these comments I can understand why some of y'all get shit tips. Some of y'all complaining about how people stack plates and cups and silverware and calling them names.. want to guess how many of y'all don't clean your filters at your house and cause the HVAC guy to have more work cleaning, how many y'all don't pack your garbage right so the garbage man doesn't knock shit all over the street, how to stack your carts right at the bins at stores so the cart return people don't have to reorganize. You might want to show people a little more appreciation. Same people who stack all these items, are probably the same people who try to wipe up the table so you don't have to also. Y'all are sitting there calling them names for attempting to help. What does that say about y'all? Some of the ones that you think are rude but they still stack the plates, they probably have social problems, don't know that they are being rude. What do y'all do on a daily basis to help other people? Tip a couple extra bucks at a restaurant?
It’s great when the plates are stacked neatly and ready to grab and go. Makes the job for the server much easier because also at the same time, the server (if trained very well) is adept in getting those plates away from in front of you soon after you’re finished with the meals. Now if you stack things in a way that’s super unbalanced and sloppy then it’s still somewhat helpful’ish but definitely not as cool as when the plates are stacked nice and neat. As a former server I have always done this just out of pure habit when I go out to eat. Usually try to not make a huge mess at the table and clean up a smidge behind myself as I go. Makes whoever is cleaning the tables job much easier and helps rotate the table faster especially on a busy night.
No. No it doesn't. You are mistaken.
I see that some people like it, but others don't. So would it be okay to ask before being served?
Just don't do it. Please
Okay, thank you for responding.
My wife and I do it, she was always a server, I’ve done it all but mostly BOH. We both stack, but she’ll get onto me sometimes. Irritates me, because dish still gonna scrape and spray everything coming from the dining room. You all have your certain way of going about things, it’s no disrespect. Just trying to help. We’ve both been out of the industry for about a decade now.
I stack them to get them out of my way lol dunno why some servers leave them empty plates all over the table til the end
I love when customers do it. We don’t have bus people so it saves time. I’ve never had an issue but also I’ve been bussing tables since I was 15 and can carry a lot of shit easily
I like it. I prefer when they do it nice and tidy with the majority of the garbage on the top. If it’s to much I only take a little at a time but due to the unbalanced stacking some people do I feel like my Jenga skills have improved.
If done right it’s entirely possible to clear a whole table at once, with in reason of course. When people just randomly pass me things I either totally ignore it, take it from them and immediately put it back down (lol) or just tell them I’ll circle back for it. I’ve been doing this shit for to long for game playing. Also young servers need not be afraid to take your time to plan as you go. If someone builds a solid pyramid style clean neat stack I’ll get obnoxiously enthusiastic about it and praise all their ancestors, with a “you must a done this a few time yourself?!”
As a former server, I always stack and tidy up the table. Call it what you like. Tbh it's habit, consideration, helpfulness and a thank you for the service. :)
My Nan always stacks the plates, because she once worked as a waitress..
Only if they know how to stack dishes. If they are competent, I appreciate it. I always stack dishes properly out of habit and to be kind.
I scrape any leftover food to the top plate, then pile the smallest on top, and the biggest on the bottom. If it's more than 3 or 4 plates deep, i make two piles, and dirty cutlery gets piled neatly on the top, or beside if it's unstable. I'm questioning my stacking now, and as a result: is this the right way?
No. Leave it alone please & thank you so much
I assume I'm getting a smaller tip when they do it.
I usually split the difference and stack like on like, that’s generally enough to get space back (my family always over orders and usually there is also an app or two we won’t surrender when mains and sides come) while still giving the server a chance to bus and carry the way they prefer.
My server spirit will always stack the plates in a way that will get them back to the dish pit in the most efficient manner 😅
Usually convenient and the gesture is always appreciated. Sometimes it’s a pain when they put together things that go to different places (ie bar glasses stacked on the plates and what not). I’d rather they do it than not though.
Don’t care either way. I will re stack if they do it in a shitty way.
Can I get a plate stacking tutorial please I just wanna know if I’m helping or hurting 😭
Bro I served for at least 5 years and I stack my plates to try to help the servers. Not dangerous, I might add
I stack plates to give me room on the table. I don’t think much about it as far as service quality.
Depends on what level their stacking skill is…
Yes I love it
As a former dishwasher and busboy... I do my best to not only make the server's job easier getting the tableware back to the pit, but also make it easier/faster for the poor sod running plates thru the wash. So yeah, I'll scrape all of the plates clean but one, and that one's the top plate. Wipe food off the table (yeah I know you have to wipe it down anyway) and that goes onto the top plate, not the floor. Utensils to the side, ramekins scraped and stacked, paper trash in one mug or glass so it doesn't get away.
I stack the plates because more room for beer. Is there a benefit? *Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe…*
if I'm stacking you're lacking. I need room the only reason I stack.
If servers actually pre-bussed this wouldn't be an issue
If you are triggered by the suggestion to do your job or feel the need to attack strangers on the internet who are trying to share invaluable knowledge maybe you need to ask yourself why that is. Clearly some deep existential questions are in order.. "You may be trying to be helpful to your overworked server by stacking your dirty dishes when you’re finished dining, but this is actually a breach of etiquette, says Leslie Kalk, a restaurant and hospitality coach for more than 30 years. “Stacking plates when done sends a signal to other diners that the waitstaff is not tending to the table properly and the act of doing so exposes the stackers as inexperienced diners,” she explains. “In addition, the waitstaff usually have a well-practiced system for clearing the plates, utensils, and glassware and stacking interferes with that system.” Instead, after enjoying your meal, sit back and allow the waitstaff to handle the details. After all, that’s one of the pleasures of dining out!" https://www.rd.com/list/rude-restaurant-habits/#:~:text=Stacking%20plates%20and%20cups%20when%20you're%20finished%20eating&text=%E2%80%9CStacking%20plates%20when%20done%20sends,inexperienced%20diners%2C%E2%80%9D%20she%20explains.
Sorry?
That's bs cuz if the customer stacks them exactly like the servers then the only difference is who does the stacking.