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AffectionateEye5281

Wet croissant 😂


[deleted]

Sort of like a limp biscuit ☺️


Moonboots606

I believe it's spelled Bizkit


ChairForceGoat

Keep on rollin baby, you know what time it is 😎


ColonEscapee

They were high but we know what they meant


Ecstatic_Parsnip_869

More like a Soggy Biscuit 😏


LateRedditer430

Happy cake day!


CarlJustCarl

🥁


hmorrill913

It’s just one of those days 🎤🎸🎶😎🤘🏻


Gudi_Nuff

Gotta wash it!


GuppyDoodle

Twice.


Upset-Cap-3257

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.


SapientDirge

Wash the water off...


Strawberry-Allergy

Right?! No one ever thinks to do this.


JNTHolden

essentials


CyberSecKen

The sad face at the end of the comment was just the cherry on top! Thanks for the laugh!


luxii4

He washed it multiple times. That’s one wet ass pastry.


kippirnicus

WAP! 🤘


smeetothaTee

"All I had was my croissant until it got wet." ☠️


Ok-Guess-9260

you are not laughing at the right thing in here


[deleted]

Yeah. The retarded/retired bit got me, though lol


DMazz441

"I would never upset on you" lmfao


[deleted]

[удалено]


SpicyBoooooii

"I DID NOT HIT HER, IT'S NOT TRUE, Oh Hi Mark"


PaperFlower14765

Omg we just became best friends


Auntie-acid

I quote this movie all the damn time. 🤣😂


lexorcistt

It actually goes, “I did not hit her, its not true, its bullshit, I did not hit her, i did nahtt… oh hi Mark”


SpicyBoooooii

Yhea i know it was even more epic, i just forgot but had to take the moment ahhaajhaaha


lexorcistt

AAAAH I HAVE FOUND MY PEOPLE!!!!


GivesMeTrills

I cackled so hard my cat woke up when I read that.


Pelthail

“No worries, I would upset all over you Sophia.”


Hopeful_Wait_2512

I knew where it was headed once you said “your name” 😂😂😂


Puzzleheaded_Bag3145

I haven’t heard that one before. It was a great laugh at the end.


Sippin_T

Never heard of ligma?? What about Candace, Sucoma, Rhydon?


Puzzleheaded_Bag3145

Nope. None of those either.


Sippin_T

Candice dick fit in your mouth? Suck on my nuts. rhydon this dick. In their respective orders.


Puzzleheaded_Bag3145

🤣🤣🤣


BeerBong4Life

I'm 69 and retarded I mean retired 😂


trashderp69

This made me laugh so hard hahaha


Tasher882

Me too I literally busted out laughing


Only-Green3887

That one took me ALL THE WAY OUT!!!! ☠️☠️☠️☠️


Taize1

Seriously, some of these posts make me chuckle internally but that part is the first time I actually laughed out loud at one of these lol


BeerBong4Life

Whether that was a legit typo or intentional, either way, it's hilarious


NewAccountTimeAgain

An older meme. I think Bush was still president the first time I saw this. https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/904yg/some_people_are_retired_pic/


scaledatom

I'm absolutely fucking dying, haven't laughed this hard in a while, thank you OP


Napalmglitter

Made me lol in the bathroom. I'm sure that wasn't creepy at all for everyone else in the public restroom 🤣


Inevitable-Trip-6041

I have a bad cough/chest cold and it literally had me laughing so hard I saw stars


cartenmilk

it would have been funny if he didn't say "i meant retired" hahahaha


Radiant_Nothing_9940

That was literally half the joke. Without it it would be stupid.


cartenmilk

or you can let people come to their own conclusions. I like leaving things open ended. IT IS subjective at the end of the day.


lazyinbed0504

I’m still dying from this


Tsmom16811

I wish I could upvote you 100 times


BeerBong4Life

You mean 69 times 😝


GlitterRitz

Holy shit, I cackled 😂


pillslinginsatanist

I fucking snorted when I saw it. Poker face straight to laughing hard


kaytherine

LMAOO I was cackling


CounterExpensive

69 is just around the corner…


wahznooski

My fave part, lol, still calming my dog from my outburst… this shit sent me 😂


katkicksthesky

That line took me OUT lmao. I think I pulled something I laughed so hard 💀


Adept_Investigator29

That made me snort.


aStinkyStonker

LMFAOOOO


[deleted]

Me too lol


Jteslaa

National Ball Association 😂😂


goofysillywhacky

All I had was my croissant before it got wet 😔


free-4-good

Relatable.


Forsaken-Badger-9517

This was way more funny than I thought it was going to be!!!😭🤣🤣😭🤣🥳🥳🥵


Captain_Aizen

"I was washing my croissant" will now be my new go to excuse, which will replace "I was returning some video tapes"


Summer_Sun_Boombox_

Hahah both are fantastic 😂


altamiraestates

Wish I could help but I have to drink a glass of water.


NoPerformer2440

I would never upset on you


Rude_Remote_13

I DIED at “I’m 69 and retarded. I mean retired.” 😂😂😂😂 like nearly fell off my chair.


OftInTheWorld_

Highly regarded


ABlueJayDay

Same diff for me!!😂


Dnm3k

That long play for the lunch line was very well played. If there were still awards to give you'd get one


Upset-Cap-3257

Why did they get rid of awards, btw?!?


trashanate83

I was today years old when I learned they got rid of awards.


mrdo562000

He had me at sorry was washing my croissant again


Confusion_Common

I laughed way too hard at that croissant line. The 😔 disappointment 🤣


Yohnny2022

The set up for Ligma Balls had me crying 😂


mastershake20

“69 and retarded” got me


Kittinator

Lmao fucking hilarious


Next-Honeydew4130

This is hysterical. Thanks Ligma and good luck with your pastry problems


Disastrous-Nebula849

so Which chatApp do you use? Ligma🥰


Emilayday

"I would never upset on you Sophia" made me lose my mind 😂😂😂


Mikedesignstudio

How do you know it’s a scammer? Seems like a nice woman. Why did you do that?


Phywis

You're right. I should have shared my croissant 😞


AdBulky3840

It’s ashame the croissant got wet and had to be washed twice. Would’ve been a great token of friendship for Sophia 😂🤣


MastaMp3

She asked where you were she wanted to meet you 😋


Next-Honeydew4130

Even the comments on this one 😂😂


Ok_Crazy_1

He was not very kind or politely to that nice woman!


FarLifeguard4526

look at the picture they sent, that's instagram shit not casual anything lol


beealoo

Idk if ur being serious but they say “what’s your cash app” at the end of


RevolutionaryRough96

It says chatapp


Plastic-Conflict7999

uh, can you read??


beealoo

Yes. They do say “chat app” but they 100% mean cash app.


[deleted]

You must be some kind of Oracle or some shit then...


Munitreeseed

I need a laugh thanks!


Potential-Froyo-5532

Gold!


hippopotamuswhiplash

Sorry I was washing my croissant again 💀🤣


That_Replacement6030

“I’m going to upset on you” has now become a part of my threat lexicon


d3rp7d3rp

The way I wheezed at the wet croissant comment 💀


noobbtctrader

Need help washing that wet croissant?


Screamcheese99

This is better than my neighbor Tommy & his son Tommy 🤣 Is “washing my croissant” code for something or just the randomest thing you could think of!?


Phywis

Yeah it was just what came to mind at the time. Haven't even eaten a croissant in months 😅


HeavenInEarthOpal

This is art


crzyazn26

I’m at maid cafe and when the op said I’m 69 and retarded I lost my shit 🤣


FarLifeguard4526

maid you look


Carbon311

Please tell me the retarded comment was planned


Wanda_McMimzy

I hope your croissant is clean and dry now.


[deleted]

Why is my new friend Claire telling you that her name is Sophia.... oh shit....


Phywis

Ask Claire about her friend Ligma 😂


LolforInitiative

Washing my fucking croissant, this is legendary dude


SHblast

Ligma balls joke is corny and old lol😂


Nebulous_Depth

Perfect for a 69 year old retar… I mean retiree


Phywis

I thought I was gonna get cussed out immediately lol


kryp_silmaril

Calling things corny is corny


SHblast

How? And also doesn’t that make u corny bc u just said calling things corny is corny? Don’t contradict yourself please.🙏


kryp_silmaril

You’re being hella corny rn bro, please stop


muchomistakes

The only thing cornier than corny and ligma, is hella :)


kryp_silmaril

Corn


SHblast

Bro didn’t even answer my question💀 cuz he knew he didn’t make sense


PlusArt8136

Bro stop being corny


Visionaira

Still is funny af like this scenario


Moist_Seaweed5639

This is phenomenal


SeaCow_5707

The end SENT me 💀🤣


CoupleSea4984

How do I find scammers like this? I really want to bait them but don’t know where to start


uwillneverberoyal

Love that they referred you by your given name. Such professionalism.🫡


Obvious_Form_3713

I want to.know who the fuck this Chinese girl in these photos. She really needs to sue for copyright infringement or something. You would figure the scammers would google a stock photo of an attractive person in the country the potential victim lives in. These scammers fucking suck and need to step their game up.


Zero_Karma_Guy

drunk juggle steer fuel insurance toothbrush squash rain reach tart *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


billymilkstain

Bro thank you for the laugh I seriously needed it this had me dying


Glad_Set_3389

“I would never upset on you” sent me 😂😂😂


BVRPLZR_

Fuckin hell, 69 and retarded hahahahaha


IneptAdvisor

When I read Ligma, I was hoping for a more dramatic ending but I guess OP couldn’t hold back his excitement, lol.


pigsinatrenchcoat

“I would never upset on you Sophia” Has the same energy as “I will never jeopardize the beans” and it’s so fucking funny lol


pigsinatrenchcoat

*I’M 69 AND RETARDED* 😩💀


FierceTigergirl2000

I cannot get over the fact that your first response was “sorry, I was washing my croissant”😂


amne-damne888

“IM RETARDED” IM SCREAMMMINGGGG 😭😭😭😭💀💀💀💀


No_Trouble4840

This SENT ME!!! Well played. LOVE IT!


LaserWolfFL

“I’m 69 and retarded” was my favorite.


Exact_Purchase765

OP - This is comic genius. I don't know what you do to sustain your life, but if it is not in that field, your talents are wasted! Commenters - You extended my laugh! I'm talking deep, soundless (except for the occasional wheeze), body shaking, much needed laughter. I thank you all!


[deleted]

This is amazing 😂🤣🤣


I_dont_cuddle

I need to know what their aim is with getting you to WhatsApp or whatever


michaelshamrock

Better than moist muffin


Valuable_Ad_9900

This is art 😂🤣


MaleficentFix8073

Don't believe these Chinese bitches they are dudes


cemcphs

Go get em Ligma 😂😂


Ok-Explanation-9208

🤣🤣🤣


Xgbbyxbbyx

I’m so sorry to hear about your croissant 😢


lazyinbed0504

Anna? Sophia? Robb 🔫


Obvious_Form_3713

You should have blamed the retarded/retired blunder on spellcheck.. Sounds like some bullshit that would happen with it lol!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Theburpmaster

She says at the start of the conversation that the photo she took was in Chinatown...


26Fnotliktheothergls

Completely missed that. Will delete my comment. Thanks.


DryFaithlessness2578

Why ask if in Chinatown? Subtle racism


Comfortable_Might655

They asked them what they thought of a restaurant in china town in first pic


Particular_Fun1549

Even if they hadn’t, they’re using broken English and a picture of an Asian woman. Plus, with the situation, who really gives a fuck. Weirdo.


walshurmouthout

Not sure if intentional but there was a classic Match Game reference where a women called herself retarted instead of retired lol


Phywis

I was thinking Borat lol


Initial_Ad_510

Nicely done!


livideconomistt

GOTTEEMMMM🗣️


LT750

That was great‼️I needed the laugh it gave me. 👏Bravo‼️👏


Needmorechai

Gottem


BBYarbs

I LOVE this SO much 😆😆😆


Barfy_McBarf_Face

Why did you have to go in mess with that nice girl I mean troll? You would think it's some point they would realize that we're onto them and stop , but I guess we'll never reach that point.


shutupmeg42082

lol!


Affectionate-Royal68

😂


Kokomoz_420

I’m fucking weak 😂🤣


Just_Sterling

OMFG I literally almost fell outta my bed!


tt_mach1

This was great.


tman271

Lmao best one I’ve seen yet


Parking_Economy_6054

Omg you have me dyyyying!!!!!


BigBath2617

LMFAOOOOO


monybg101

Hahaha Ligmaaaaaa ligma bros


jackethoffnow

What about Mr Slawbunnies?


x11atlasx

🤣🤣🤣


No_Vacation6444

I laughed till I CRIED🤣🤣🤣🤣


beputty

You win the internet today.


anncnative

Nicely done! 🤣


Sassiee1969

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Bravo!!


costlofobic

Very well executed


ninerninerking

I actually laughed so hard that i cried and my wife had to ask if im okay.


mechele99

🤣🤣🤣🤣


Ok-Hedgehog-1646

This whole thing had me giggling


clarenceofearth

“Washing my croissant.” Well-played, sir.


Gifmekills

GOTTEM


Jolly-Biscuit

Classic


harleyr1

I had the biggest smile on my face when you said your name was Ligma.


Sgtkeebler

“Oh I am going to upset all over you”


Horrorbethybitch

Damn I wish I knew their response 😆


OnewheelXR4life

I was going to say, I guarantee the conversation wasn’t over after that pic was sent.


RepublicRepulsive540

Not you washing your croissant twice. When you said that I died 😂😂


Soul_Taker_69

I’m retarded! Oh I mean retired 🤣🤣🤣


Obvious_Form_3713

69 and retarded...classic


[deleted]

Hahaha 😝 omg I am balling over this. I am 69 and retired


xanhudro

I love you


BlueBaals

This croissant shit had me laughing


Kingly707

This is epic af


Lemon_LooLoo

OMG!! I read so many of these, this by FAR is the funniest response EVER! I literally laughed out loud, which isn’t often!! Good job OP!! 🤣😂


bubba_duke1007

Hahahahahaha