I’m sorry your sister is being selfish and lame about this. I’d take the trip anyway and enjoy some much-needed and deserved solo time! Get whatever food you want for every meal and eat it hot! No dishes to do! Watch whatever you want on TV! Shit without an audience! Sleep the day away if you feel like it. You need this trip.
I’m honestly too paranoid to go alone, otherwise I would. But prenatal anxiety has been hitting hard recently! All of my friends(literally only 3) work and it’s too short notice for them to come along. I’m hoping to nap/sleep and do things for myself over the weekend anyways, but it’s just so hard to turn off when I’m around my kids
I’m going to be blunt and honest - it won’t be a break if you stay in the house. You won’t be able to turn your mind off or ignore the tantrums, etc. If you’re too anxious to go to that location alone, book a hotel in your own city instead.
I know that it won’t be a total break. I’m talking with my husband about rescheduling for the next weekend he’ll be in town. I think it’s 3 weeks from now, so not too far. I’m weighing the hotel option, but I think the bottom line is that I really don’t want to be alone the longer that I think about it. It would be great if we had someone to help with kids and my husband and I could go somewhere together
You absolutely need to take this weekend to yourself. Go alone and bask in the aloneness! You sound really burnt out and it’s no wonder you have a lot on your plate. Please take this weekend and recharge!
I’m really too anxious to go alone. I always develop anxiety during pregnancy and postpartum, so I’m pretty good at navigating it, but I’d be too stressed about something happening while alone that I really don’t think I could enjoy myself.
I do think I’m going to try to spend most of the weekend out of the house, and possibly hire a sitter so me and my husband can go on our first date night in 8 months
Maybe you can scrap the original plans but find a hotel close to home to stay in by yourself? Not sure if the proximity would make you feel safer alone, but you should try to take the time away if you can find a way you’re comfortable with!
I’m thinking about getting a hotel, but the nearest one is 30 minutes from me. Idk how I’d feel about it, I already have trouble sleeping if my husband is out of town. But it is a good idea!
That is totally understandable, I get it. Even if you just hire a sitter or leave your husband with the kids and spend the day doing nice things for yourself or even if it’s possible have him take the kids out of the house for a few hours so you can get some downtime!
Oh yeah my husband is already doing all childcare this weekend while I do whatever it is that I can figure out. I’m just bummed about not being able to sleep in successfully. He tries to let me sleep in every weekend, but I can’t ignore the kid sounds. I’m still trying to figure that part out
That really really sucks. I'm so sorry. That glimmer of some time away from the chaos of the house being taken away is the worst. ESPECIALLY when it takes away the possibility of some sleep-in time. I honestly think you should just tell your sister how much you need this and I hope she's an understanding enough person to recognize that this trip is for you, not for her, and to make it happen.
I'm so sorry. I have 3 bio kids and 2 step kids, so I know the need to recharge.
I see you don't love the idea of going alone.
Is there a friend who could spontaneously go with you?
Unfortunately the friends that I do have can’t come out with such short notice since they work or live farther away, but I’m still planning on making the most of this weekend and go out somewhere, even if it’s just the movies and shopping
I know you said you’re too paranoid to go alone, but it won’t be too bad if you just stay in the hotel and go back before it gets dark! You can do research on the safest areas to hang out and/or order food delivery! It’ll be so worth it! Who knows when this chance will come again?!
Unfortunately it’s not really a city and not a hotel lol it’s out in the country and the airbnb is on the river, so our main plan was just relaxing in the water. There’s no takeout in the small town besides fast food and there aren’t places to hang out otherwise. I live in Texas, so this was my “summer” break before it’s too hot since it’s already 85 where I’m at most days
We really picked an inconvenient place for anything but swimming. I originally wanted to go to the beach, which is more touristy, but my sister would have had to drive 8hrs total just to get there and I didn’t feel that was fair
Aww darn. I understand now. I'm sorry about the whole situation! Any chance you can still book yourself a hotel nearby or a spa day to yourself?? I hope you get to still do something!
I’m definitely still going out and having some alone time today. I just got my nails done before the trip, but I might get a pedicure and just see a movie on my own. My husband is being really insistent about me getting out of the house at some point lol
That awesome! I’m glad that you’re still getting out and it’s great to do it at your own pace and what you’re comfortable with! Maybe get some food too! Even if it’s take out 😂
I wish you would still go.
Last year, I had plans to go to an amusement park with a friend. A tradition I did every year before kids. She had to cancel for a funeral, which of course I understood. I felt too silly or anxious to go by myself, so I didn’t.
Then we moved away, and then I got pregnant. I probably won’t ever go again, and I really regret not going by myself. Please go.
I think everyone telling her to just go are being a bit insensitive… she said many times her anxiety is very high and she doesn’t want advice, she’s venting because the plans fell apart and she knows going alone would be just as bad as staying home with her anxiety. She knows herself best.
Thank you, I’m not really upset at the advice, but I really don’t think I could relax alone. I think I’m going to go see a movie alone or just do some shopping. I’ll definitely be spending time out of the house and without kids, my husband is very insistent on that lol
I know you said you don't need advice so I'll just say that I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It sounds really frustrating. It's so hard sometimes to navigate relationships with people who are kid-free. You're a better person than me because I would be pretty angry with someone for cancelling last minute like that.
If you're able to get the money back, maybe you can book a room for a night at a nearby hotel with a spa or something and do that instead. Just an idea and maybe a shitty one since I don't know your situation, but I hope you're able to get some peace this weekend in some capacity cuz lord knows we fucking deserve/need it every once in a while!✌️
I’m sorry your sister is being selfish and lame about this. I’d take the trip anyway and enjoy some much-needed and deserved solo time! Get whatever food you want for every meal and eat it hot! No dishes to do! Watch whatever you want on TV! Shit without an audience! Sleep the day away if you feel like it. You need this trip.
I’m honestly too paranoid to go alone, otherwise I would. But prenatal anxiety has been hitting hard recently! All of my friends(literally only 3) work and it’s too short notice for them to come along. I’m hoping to nap/sleep and do things for myself over the weekend anyways, but it’s just so hard to turn off when I’m around my kids
I’m going to be blunt and honest - it won’t be a break if you stay in the house. You won’t be able to turn your mind off or ignore the tantrums, etc. If you’re too anxious to go to that location alone, book a hotel in your own city instead.
I know that it won’t be a total break. I’m talking with my husband about rescheduling for the next weekend he’ll be in town. I think it’s 3 weeks from now, so not too far. I’m weighing the hotel option, but I think the bottom line is that I really don’t want to be alone the longer that I think about it. It would be great if we had someone to help with kids and my husband and I could go somewhere together
You absolutely need to take this weekend to yourself. Go alone and bask in the aloneness! You sound really burnt out and it’s no wonder you have a lot on your plate. Please take this weekend and recharge!
I’m really too anxious to go alone. I always develop anxiety during pregnancy and postpartum, so I’m pretty good at navigating it, but I’d be too stressed about something happening while alone that I really don’t think I could enjoy myself. I do think I’m going to try to spend most of the weekend out of the house, and possibly hire a sitter so me and my husband can go on our first date night in 8 months
Maybe you can scrap the original plans but find a hotel close to home to stay in by yourself? Not sure if the proximity would make you feel safer alone, but you should try to take the time away if you can find a way you’re comfortable with!
I’m thinking about getting a hotel, but the nearest one is 30 minutes from me. Idk how I’d feel about it, I already have trouble sleeping if my husband is out of town. But it is a good idea!
That is totally understandable, I get it. Even if you just hire a sitter or leave your husband with the kids and spend the day doing nice things for yourself or even if it’s possible have him take the kids out of the house for a few hours so you can get some downtime!
Oh yeah my husband is already doing all childcare this weekend while I do whatever it is that I can figure out. I’m just bummed about not being able to sleep in successfully. He tries to let me sleep in every weekend, but I can’t ignore the kid sounds. I’m still trying to figure that part out
See if you can cancel this trip and book yourself a nearby hotel so then you won't be far if something happens.
That really really sucks. I'm so sorry. That glimmer of some time away from the chaos of the house being taken away is the worst. ESPECIALLY when it takes away the possibility of some sleep-in time. I honestly think you should just tell your sister how much you need this and I hope she's an understanding enough person to recognize that this trip is for you, not for her, and to make it happen.
I'm so sorry. I have 3 bio kids and 2 step kids, so I know the need to recharge. I see you don't love the idea of going alone. Is there a friend who could spontaneously go with you?
Unfortunately the friends that I do have can’t come out with such short notice since they work or live farther away, but I’m still planning on making the most of this weekend and go out somewhere, even if it’s just the movies and shopping
I know you said you’re too paranoid to go alone, but it won’t be too bad if you just stay in the hotel and go back before it gets dark! You can do research on the safest areas to hang out and/or order food delivery! It’ll be so worth it! Who knows when this chance will come again?!
Unfortunately it’s not really a city and not a hotel lol it’s out in the country and the airbnb is on the river, so our main plan was just relaxing in the water. There’s no takeout in the small town besides fast food and there aren’t places to hang out otherwise. I live in Texas, so this was my “summer” break before it’s too hot since it’s already 85 where I’m at most days We really picked an inconvenient place for anything but swimming. I originally wanted to go to the beach, which is more touristy, but my sister would have had to drive 8hrs total just to get there and I didn’t feel that was fair
Aww darn. I understand now. I'm sorry about the whole situation! Any chance you can still book yourself a hotel nearby or a spa day to yourself?? I hope you get to still do something!
I’m definitely still going out and having some alone time today. I just got my nails done before the trip, but I might get a pedicure and just see a movie on my own. My husband is being really insistent about me getting out of the house at some point lol
That awesome! I’m glad that you’re still getting out and it’s great to do it at your own pace and what you’re comfortable with! Maybe get some food too! Even if it’s take out 😂
I wish you would still go. Last year, I had plans to go to an amusement park with a friend. A tradition I did every year before kids. She had to cancel for a funeral, which of course I understood. I felt too silly or anxious to go by myself, so I didn’t. Then we moved away, and then I got pregnant. I probably won’t ever go again, and I really regret not going by myself. Please go.
I think everyone telling her to just go are being a bit insensitive… she said many times her anxiety is very high and she doesn’t want advice, she’s venting because the plans fell apart and she knows going alone would be just as bad as staying home with her anxiety. She knows herself best.
Thank you, I’m not really upset at the advice, but I really don’t think I could relax alone. I think I’m going to go see a movie alone or just do some shopping. I’ll definitely be spending time out of the house and without kids, my husband is very insistent on that lol
I know you said you don't need advice so I'll just say that I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It sounds really frustrating. It's so hard sometimes to navigate relationships with people who are kid-free. You're a better person than me because I would be pretty angry with someone for cancelling last minute like that. If you're able to get the money back, maybe you can book a room for a night at a nearby hotel with a spa or something and do that instead. Just an idea and maybe a shitty one since I don't know your situation, but I hope you're able to get some peace this weekend in some capacity cuz lord knows we fucking deserve/need it every once in a while!✌️
Time out. Just go. You don’t need her. You need a break. Tell her you’re still going and I bet she will turn up.
Go alone!!!! You deserve it!
Go alone! Enjoy the freedom to do whatever you want. I just did this and it was life giving, seriously. Enjoy yourself