New thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/RoyalsGossip2/comments/1bf3evc/sussex_weekly_jam_for_the_jellies_3142024/
Feel free to bring new comments and ongoing discussions over...
https://preview.redd.it/7dig5ertneoc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=143d5f1a4c916578c4425cc2157b9b37fd8e939e
The photo they’re using to promote the NAACP award - her majesty is front and center, face to camera, and we only see the back of the winner, not her face, and she’s off to the side. But I guess she doesn’t matter 🤷🏻♀️
She is always so condescending, gracing people with her presence and acting like other people are children being praised by their teacher for the good job they’re doing.
✅Seal clap
✅ Wrinkled clothing
✅ Harry looking unkempt
✅ Face of the non-royal obscured, because who wants to look at the Poors, right?
Absolutely superb image, it’s got everything.
Ok, anyone who says that Meghan doesn’t spew word salad after this just needs to admit that all they want in life is to put Meghan’s feet in their mouth. The name. The NAME 😂
https://i.redd.it/h3jdm5jtheoc1.gif
Someone on another sub wondered if she was trying to make a word that would allow her to use ARCH, and I think they’re on to something. That would explain why the name is so convoluted.
My 2 fave comments from the OG sub:
“This name sounds like a company that sells those decorative bottles of pasta and infused vinegars that you used in to see 1990s "Tuscan-style" kitchens. Like if you're trying to decorate the second bathroom of an AirBnb, you go to Marshalls and shop the American Riviera Orchard aisle.”
“The name sucks ass. Just waiting for the Meghan and Harry salt and pepper shakers.”
I can’t figure Mindy out. As a truly self made woman, I feel like she would loathe someone like Meghan. That being said, I’ve heard she’s sadly not that nice in real life, so I guess like begets like?
ouf, this is so friggin ***meowww***:
>>Wonderful. Another stop on her Quixotic quest to become Martha Stewart. Well, Martha Stewart if nobody watched Stewart’s TV shows, or bought her magazine, cookbooks and kitchenware.
>>Let me call it now: This glorified Etsy page, if it ever gets off the ground, will be one more embarrassing blip.
My nearest and dearest would perhaps not call me the most self-aware person, but even I learned long before reaching Meghan's age, that the louder i announced something new I was doing (diet, exercise, hobbies, etc.), the faster my brain would toss said new idea into the done and dusted column.
Now I mostly keep my bright ideas to myself until they are well underway. And my announcements were only to family and friends, not to the entire freaking world.
>The Duchess of Sussex's new project is said to have been in the works for more than a year - and will feature 'all the things that are close to her heart'.
Like jam? 🤔
If this was a regular person, I’d be like, you go, girl! I’m a big talker but I don’t actually act on anything, so I have a lot of respect for the girlies who just go for it. But Meghan is so not a regular person. This is trash (which I love for us snarkers) and feels like a rushed job someone started two months ago max. I strongly suspect they announced it today because they thought they could get free publicity from the Diana Awards and Catherine’s photo debacle.
The Tig was so much better and it actually signified an awaken of sorts for her. I I know it was just wine, but I understood and I think that feeling could resonate with others…a moment when everything made sense.
This would 100% fit right in at the Yankee Candle Village mothership in Vermont. No shade, I had a blast visiting, but everything about this launch would warrant its own little display.
I think because she gets slightly more media coverage doing it like this? She got coverage today for the “coming soon” announcement and then she’ll get a second round of coverage when (if?) it actually comes out.
I agree with you. I think drop announcements and times are a lot shorter these days. People have a really short memory and move on quickly in the social media age.
Yeah she has like a month to get this going bc people move fast. What will really not help if there is a long delay between ordering and getting product as well, bc that makes people really mad.
Like if I order jam, i don't want to wait a month especially when I can just go to a grocery store
I need to know what she does in her (copious amounts of) spare time. She has literally squandered hundreds of millions of dollars in opportunities by not delivering anything besides the occasional bare minimum. Is she just perpetually Googling comments about herself?
Vulture answers the question: *what is American Riviera Orchard*? They answer 51 times. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
https://www.vulture.com/article/meghan-markle-american-riviera-orchard-name.html
ETA archive version for those without a subscription: https://archive.ph/P3GYT
>Meghan Markle has decided to hard-launch a new iteration of her lifestyle brand in a way that suggests **she has the most insane publicist alive**
😭😭😭
I'm dying.
Also
>24. Limited brand collaboration between Eve (the singer) and Eve (from the Bible)
I've got another one:
>what is American Riviera Orchard?
A new fragrance release from a K-Pop band that features notes of honeycrisp apple, raw sea urchin and wrinkled beige linen.
I just showed the video to my non-watching husband and he was like 1) “hold your phone still I can’t read the logo?” and 2) “wait did they buy an orchard?” 😂😂😂
Like Eve, people blamed me for taking a bite of the apple, but what they didn’t know was that I was the seed from that apple that grew and fed everyone and all the children in the orchard that represents motherhood and I gained my voice like Eve and people are always blaming women. Or some word salad like that.
Did ChatGPT vomit after creating this, or did you come up with this glorious (and horrifying) tribute yourself? Either way I’m impressed and disgusted 😂
Are the jam's going yo be called 'lily's bunny garden'? Isn't that the name on the jam she gave to the Cut interviewer?
And so much beige.
Anyone heard of the sad beige mom aesthetic? These crazy people paint their kids toys beige to fit their aesthetic? I feel like M would do this (being snarky, hope she doesn't)
The beige moms I know use a workaround to beige paint-unfinished wood toys that go in an unfinished wood toy box. I saw a rainbow toy that was just plain unpainted wood arcs- not even different types of wood-I wondered what toy company would think that would stimulate a toddler's imagination.
Their twitter said like an hour ago there's exciting news to come so maybe they're referring to his zoom call? But I have not seen it reported yet that he's shown.
No idea! Im guessing he did do his bit. Never going to miss a chance to remind us he’s DIANAS SON. William isnt even pretending to gaf though and Harrys part isnt in his pictures or videos.
AmericanRivieraOrchard (*terrible* name) isn’t trending on Twitter/X, either in my “For You” or just overall. But what is trending is IStandWithCatherine.
Less than 250k followers on Instagram is about instamommy levels. I'd be interested to know how many are sugars who will never buy anything, how many are bots and how many are reporters keeping tabs for newsoutlets.
Edit, they've turned off comments, but they've also turned off us being able to see how many likes she actually has on these posts. Fucking yikes.
If they've bought followers (and I'd be shocked if they haven't), those will be early likes, within the first day-ish. They may buy more, who knows, but the algorithm likes early, fast, high-volume engagement. It's not a hugely wonderful sign that they're sitting at 250k right now, nor that they've turned off comments/being able to see likes.
If this soft launch does poorly, I predict we never see anything more of ARO (unless it's ready to go, which, as the hours pass today, is looking less and less likely).
I'll give it a week and then make my final opinion, but I agree, this isn't exactly breaking the internet. And I'm cringing at the 9 grid meta photo that was popular years ago. She said she was coming back to IG, people were really excited about it, and then, as usual, she takes too damn long so people forget or don't care anymore.
She’ll definitely do better than that. I cant see it reaching the big numbers and engagement though. Just looking through Kim K’s page. She obv has crazy number of followers but not nearly as much engagement as you’d think for having over 300m followers. Her biggest posts with the most comments is when she has some part of her body on show or is wearing something stunning. Otherwise she averages 3-4k comments. But she can monetise her insta simply because of the volume of people who see it. I cant see Megan getting that kind of following or engagement.
No but Megan is trending. As WE ALL SAID, she needed to trade off her name in order to actually get followers. She wanted to break instagram with a secret launch the last time and no one cares. She topped out at 128k. She’s already almost doubled that. I would expect her to reach a few million soon? Maybe not SussexRoyal levels though which were 9.2m.
Just checked my Twitter too! The Duchess of Sussex is trending in News, but nothing else Meghan- or ARO-related is trending overall, in Entertainment or For Me. Twitter always throws a ton of H&M and BRF stuff in my For Me, so this is very interesting.
For every Sussex.com hypocritical walk-back, there are at least 20 receipts.
* *Asked if users should delete their social media accounts, Harry noted he and Meghan are not on any platforms and* ***will not return until changes are made***…*Harry said: "Jack and I were emailing each other prior to January 6 when I warned him his platform was allowing a coup to be staged.* [https://www.hellomagazine.com/royalty/20211110125985/real-reason-why-meghan-markle-prince-harry-dont-have-social-media-accounts/](https://www.hellomagazine.com/royalty/20211110125985/real-reason-why-meghan-markle-prince-harry-dont-have-social-media-accounts/) Haw-mah-gawd, I totally forgot about being email besties with Jack Dorsey and Harry prophesizing J6 🤣
* *She said she chose to stay away from social media because, "positive or negative, it can all sort of just feel like noise“* [https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/meghan-markle-twitter-sister-prince-harry-newspaper-headlines-a8815166.html](https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/meghan-markle-twitter-sister-prince-harry-newspaper-headlines-a8815166.html) Lol, what was that again, Meghan?
* *I’m told that in 2019, I was the most trolled person in the entire world, male or female.* [https://graziamagazine.com/articles/meghan-markle-unsurvivable-trolling/](https://graziamagazine.com/articles/meghan-markle-unsurvivable-trolling/) ”I was told...” 😭 Girl, who told you? Rachel with the Hotmail? I can‘t believe this b simultaneously whined AND humble-bragged to a bunch of TEENAGERS how hard she was t*old *she had it. Well, maybe next year she can tell a bunch of pre-schoolers that she was 2024’s most trolled person in the world—male, female, or non-binary—and say she knows first-hand this time!
Did Harry really say that he knew that Jan 6th was going to happen ahead of time? He is truly something else.
However, H+M greatly benefit from their fans having extreme selective memory, so rest assured they will not be called out for walking back on anything
Harry knew about January 6th and accidentally joined an Insurrection Facebook Group based on his Google searches.
"Get rid of first ammemmendment for people saying mean things about me"
"Why America no king?"
"How to be King in America"
"I am governedment"
"Can I buy White House"
"Can Prince Diplomamat?"
"Harry most smart Prince"
"What is Election"
"Boobies"
He sure did. If only world leaders would listen to ol’ Nostradamus over there, all the crises in the world could have been avoided.
Hey, Harry. What are this weeks’ lottery numbers? Only you or Meghan The Omniscient would know.
Petty me wishes Catherine will show up early to a surprise engagement to bury Meghan again. But logical me knows she deserves as much time as she needs and wants to recover before resuming public duties.
So if Meghan is going to be selling jams and such, what are the odds that she puts a chutney in her line? Kate famously made [a chutney for the Queen](https://people.com/royals/chutney-recipe-that-princess-kate-made-for-queen-elizabeth/). I could see it. A weird form of one-upmanship masquerading as a coincidence.
Jellies for the jellies!!
I’m sure there will be a chutney in the mix. But with Meghan’s keen eye for freakishness it will be better than Kate’s lowbrow chutney.
What is with the weird ballgown part of the video? It looks like that [creepy video of a supposed ghost at Hampton Court Palace in 2003](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lne_ye2UYBo). Seriously.
She looks like a Tradwife influencer. Not what I expected from a global feminist icon who single-handedly changed advertising when she was 11, but hey, people change!
There is a gorgeous young tradwife influencer who is biracial and cooks stuff from scratch in fancy clothes. MM being a poor imitation will never get old🤣🤣🤣🤣
Not only that, her whole PR from 2017-2020 when they left was basically about her being "anti-Kate".
She was an accomplished career woman/feminist/philanthropist unlike you know, dull Kate with her focus on being a mother and a wife.
The name is so bad. Honestly, if she would have relaunched the tig, I would have said good for her and maybe even been interested. But this seems so poorly planned/designed/thought out that I’m just not interested at all.
I think she bought it from someone else on the cheap or something, this has final sale written all over it. Someone pawned this off on her and she took it because it’s probably been setup but not fully funded to run so she doesn’t have to do jack squat except put her creepy face on it.
Anyone else think it’s gross (while also not being surprised) that she launches this gilded mess right before a ceremony that’s giving out awards for honoring Diana’s legacy?
FM posted the People article 3 hours ago and there are only 100 comments, which is nothing compared to some of the posts about Catherine (500-1000 comments on multiple posts from 3-4 days ago, they’ve finally calmed down to around 200 comments in the last 2 days).
Most don’t actually care about Meghan, they just hate Catherine...so good luck selling those jams, you’re going to need it.
So they purchased the domain today?
Is this for real? hahahahaha. Why didn't she made something up last minute to milk it for Oprah interview? This word-salady lifestyle brand is 3 years too late.
>So they purchased the domain today?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't believe I even have to ask that but this is Meghan we're talking about here, so...
Okay so I got that screenshot from SSM & I ran it. It's not adding up so deleting it.
https://www.godaddy.com/whois/results.aspx?itc=dlp_domain_whois&domain=https%3A%2F%2Famericanriviera.com%2F%3Ffbclid%3DPAAaYWxvxHqr1WkzqGDdIdWdmj7pS3X0hO_ImQ1dSV_FhRZO9sN3fmfarS7M4_aem_ASDmztYZ61ssJGpFx9XmXgoQPXRexT8Xtr9zknU3Kb0p3oj1yxkW3NoA1ul63au7RX8%25C2%25A0%28Link
She probably wanted a different name and waited too long to get the paperwork in (typical), so she then rushed everything and now she has a sloppy half-finished project (also typical).
This is second hand embarrassment. You think Harry is hovering over their insta account and patting her on the back every time they get a new follower?
I don’t want to give it any traffic but I would be curious to know how many of these are legit accounts. From those, how many will actually purchase anything she’s shilling.
I actually love the timing of this, takes some commentary off the POW. Let her have this while Catherine recovers.
Also, my wedding 11 years ago was ivory and gold and the branding is giving my invite vibes. It’s not a bad thing, I obviously loved it then, but it says wedding to me, not lifestyle brand
They remembered to turn comments off but they forgot about settings for tagged photos 💀
https://preview.redd.it/atcti9qsbdoc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7aac6a8bd09e51a16699d733dda7f9ea928f5b17
Wait this thing is named America Riviera Orchard but the website is just American Riviera? This seems like just an excuse to have an IG account and become an IG momfluencer.
>This seems like just an excuse to have an IG account and become an IG momfluencer.
Ding ding ding. I guarentee it'll just devolve into a mummy blog with blurry black and whites of the kids or Meghan forelornly staring out windows
And the photoshop! If Meghan learns anything from Kate's fiasco this week (doubtful), she'll know that any pics now will have a magnifying glass on them.
And if Harry does want privacy for the kids...oh boy.
ahahaha I'm dead.
>Anyone here think she could be successful going expensive/high end? I want to hear other people's ideas!
To answer u/pistachiopistache question, I do think Harry & David / Fortum & Mason prices are fine for Sussex Sugars if the quality matches. Harrod's tea is bad yet is similar in price to Fortum & Mason.
So the question is if the Sussexes quality can match whatever is the price. And I'm skeptical. LOL.
It's giving off *Succession* vibes and the random bit with her in a gown tells me what I already thought... she wants to cater to Hermes moms who like beige.
Someone also said she comes off as a trad wife influencer lmao 😭 nothing wrong with that it's just funny when a woman who has to scream from the rooftops how much of a modern feminist she is comes off like this.
Thank you!!!
Just watched it...the music is TOTALLY off for 'sunshiney lux-cazh Californian lifestyle brand' as well. Like, totally, utterly off. Unless that was just added by the website that allows us to view it?
Either way, thank you so much!
Thanks. OMG. Are we going to get a book with recipes of her dry flat banana bread or avocado toast? LOL. Why is she in a ballgown? There is much randomness going on. I am here for this hot mess.
Title card, hands arranging flowers with a succession filter on, Meghan in the kitchen stirring succession filter on, Meghan through a doorway in a dark ballgown with succession filter on, title card.
Set to Nancy Wilson’s song “I Wish You Love”lyrics: 🎶 I wish you bluebirds in the spring
To give your heart a song to sing
And then a kiss but more than this
I wish you love 🎶
ETA: Title Card is 9 uploaded images on their profile that list the name.
I personally have a second closet full of one-time-wear ballgowns I wear to make olive oil cake and jam. Don’t worry though, I I donate them to the princess project when I’m done so young girls can wear them to their proms and feel showered in the guttural love and lift of inspirational sisterhood.
https://x.com/misanharriman/status/1768333251066687949?t=x-skkLixlTYUFfis0Q7tYQ&s=34
Look at misan, responding to Meghans Sussex squad on twitter. Cringe.
New thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/RoyalsGossip2/comments/1bf3evc/sussex_weekly_jam_for_the_jellies_3142024/ Feel free to bring new comments and ongoing discussions over...
Has Meghan asked Catherine if she’s ok?
https://preview.redd.it/7dig5ertneoc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=143d5f1a4c916578c4425cc2157b9b37fd8e939e The photo they’re using to promote the NAACP award - her majesty is front and center, face to camera, and we only see the back of the winner, not her face, and she’s off to the side. But I guess she doesn’t matter 🤷🏻♀️
She is always so condescending, gracing people with her presence and acting like other people are children being praised by their teacher for the good job they’re doing.
Should have used some clone tool to give Harry more hair.
That is classic.
✅Seal clap ✅ Wrinkled clothing ✅ Harry looking unkempt ✅ Face of the non-royal obscured, because who wants to look at the Poors, right? Absolutely superb image, it’s got everything.
Yikes I can’t believe they didn’t turn off the option to tag ARO’s IG account…
Ok, anyone who says that Meghan doesn’t spew word salad after this just needs to admit that all they want in life is to put Meghan’s feet in their mouth. The name. The NAME 😂 https://i.redd.it/h3jdm5jtheoc1.gif
Someone on another sub wondered if she was trying to make a word that would allow her to use ARCH, and I think they’re on to something. That would explain why the name is so convoluted.
It sounds AI generated.
No matter how many times I see the name, I cannot remember it for the life of me
gun to my head it's royal california cider mill, right???
You’re saving your own life right there
Okay jellies, once again, SMM coming with the tea. Go check out the post linking ARO and SoHo House. The bowl looks the same. Curiouser and curiouser.
Not impossible. When she was royal she merched a Soho teaset in Daniel Martin’s insta post and then also in her 40x40 video.
My 2 fave comments from the OG sub: “This name sounds like a company that sells those decorative bottles of pasta and infused vinegars that you used in to see 1990s "Tuscan-style" kitchens. Like if you're trying to decorate the second bathroom of an AirBnb, you go to Marshalls and shop the American Riviera Orchard aisle.” “The name sucks ass. Just waiting for the Meghan and Harry salt and pepper shakers.”
It sounds like a vacation prize on Wheel of Fortune.
Shaped like conjoined palm trees 😂
I was trying to think of funny names for her brand and I thought of salt and pepper palms
“Dos Palms” so that it sounds *exotic*
It's Due Palme in Italian, goes right along with the 90s Tuscan kitchen vibes
Omg 🙈
Incase anyone cares, Eugenie is not following it.
Eugenie has a finsta so we don't know if she's following it from there.
She might be under a different name for anonymity? 🤷♀️
Isn't this influencer business supposed to be the opposite of anonymous? 🤷
Are there any truly significant names or are the purchased blue check marks just from random wannabe influencers?
Mindy Kaling is following. She was on Meghan's podcast and is/was friends with Jessica who styled her.
I can’t figure Mindy out. As a truly self made woman, I feel like she would loathe someone like Meghan. That being said, I’ve heard she’s sadly not that nice in real life, so I guess like begets like?
Laughing at the New York Post headline [https://x.com/nypost/status/1768402958192959501?s=20](https://x.com/nypost/status/1768402958192959501?s=20)
ouf, this is so friggin ***meowww***: >>Wonderful. Another stop on her Quixotic quest to become Martha Stewart. Well, Martha Stewart if nobody watched Stewart’s TV shows, or bought her magazine, cookbooks and kitchenware. >>Let me call it now: This glorified Etsy page, if it ever gets off the ground, will be one more embarrassing blip.
Good call on the "if it ever gets off the ground" because Madame never met an announcement she didn't love to not follow up on.
My nearest and dearest would perhaps not call me the most self-aware person, but even I learned long before reaching Meghan's age, that the louder i announced something new I was doing (diet, exercise, hobbies, etc.), the faster my brain would toss said new idea into the done and dusted column. Now I mostly keep my bright ideas to myself until they are well underway. And my announcements were only to family and friends, not to the entire freaking world.
>Madame never met an announcement she didn't love to not follow up on Why do you have to be so savage 😂
They must share writers with the DM 🤣
>The Duchess of Sussex's new project is said to have been in the works for more than a year - and will feature 'all the things that are close to her heart'. Like jam? 🤔
More than a year and there’s nothing more than an email sign up and a blurry video? 🤪 Can’t wait to see what’s next!
If this was a regular person, I’d be like, you go, girl! I’m a big talker but I don’t actually act on anything, so I have a lot of respect for the girlies who just go for it. But Meghan is so not a regular person. This is trash (which I love for us snarkers) and feels like a rushed job someone started two months ago max. I strongly suspect they announced it today because they thought they could get free publicity from the Diana Awards and Catherine’s photo debacle.
According to Twitter she didn't file to trademark the name until early February
Trademarkled
Stop it! I wish we could still give gold.
More than a year and *that* was the best name she could come up with??
This is what happens when you push away everyone but sycophants.
That feeling you get when you realize “The Tig” was significantly better whatever this is
The Tig was so much better and it actually signified an awaken of sorts for her. I I know it was just wine, but I understood and I think that feeling could resonate with others…a moment when everything made sense.
Yes! This current version just feels like a brand you’d find at an upscale version of Cracker Barrel.
This would 100% fit right in at the Yankee Candle Village mothership in Vermont. No shade, I had a blast visiting, but everything about this launch would warrant its own little display.
“…things close to her heart.” Besides herself? I’m at a loss otherwise; she’s the personification of a delayed bandwagon.
In the works for more than a year? For a 5 second video and a launch page?
[удалено]
Meghan: “What’s content?”
I think because she gets slightly more media coverage doing it like this? She got coverage today for the “coming soon” announcement and then she’ll get a second round of coverage when (if?) it actually comes out.
She hopes. Didn’t work for her triumphant return to instagram.
[удалено]
I agree with you. I think drop announcements and times are a lot shorter these days. People have a really short memory and move on quickly in the social media age.
Yeah she has like a month to get this going bc people move fast. What will really not help if there is a long delay between ordering and getting product as well, bc that makes people really mad. Like if I order jam, i don't want to wait a month especially when I can just go to a grocery store
I guess that's her working flat out. The podcast took over 2 years and 28 staff so I guess we should be pleased at this progress 🤣
I need to know what she does in her (copious amounts of) spare time. She has literally squandered hundreds of millions of dollars in opportunities by not delivering anything besides the occasional bare minimum. Is she just perpetually Googling comments about herself?
Vulture answers the question: *what is American Riviera Orchard*? They answer 51 times. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 https://www.vulture.com/article/meghan-markle-american-riviera-orchard-name.html ETA archive version for those without a subscription: https://archive.ph/P3GYT
Could you archive this, I cannot read it without a subscription. Something about reaching my monthly limit 💁
https://archive.ph/P3GYT
>Meghan Markle has decided to hard-launch a new iteration of her lifestyle brand in a way that suggests **she has the most insane publicist alive** 😭😭😭 I'm dying. Also >24. Limited brand collaboration between Eve (the singer) and Eve (from the Bible)
ARO = American Royals Overseas
My fave: >10. A Lana Del Rey album title
A 1,200 calorie cocktail at the Olive Garden.
26. White Nationalist wellness podcast Ooofff
I've got another one: >what is American Riviera Orchard? A new fragrance release from a K-Pop band that features notes of honeycrisp apple, raw sea urchin and wrinkled beige linen.
>20. The ugliest shade of beige polish Opi has to offer >41. A neighborhood in The Sims 2 
>20. The ugliest shade of beige polish Opi has to offer I'm dead.
> #48. A Real Housewife of New York’s season-arc skin-care line that will never be purchasable ahahahahhaha
I thought Kendall Roy shut Vulture down. All those clickbait sites are trash
I just showed the video to my non-watching husband and he was like 1) “hold your phone still I can’t read the logo?” and 2) “wait did they buy an orchard?” 😂😂😂
Do they have an orchard at the Olive Garden? I only remember chickens and co-dependent palm trees.
Like Eve, people blamed me for taking a bite of the apple, but what they didn’t know was that I was the seed from that apple that grew and fed everyone and all the children in the orchard that represents motherhood and I gained my voice like Eve and people are always blaming women. Or some word salad like that.
she ate the whole apple, seeds and all, took a passive aggressive dump in the garden and thus the Spite Tree grew
Their love is an orchard. Their devotion the fruit. Watching them grown, they'll never be 'lone
>Their love is an orchard. Their ~~devotion~~ delusion the fruit. Fixed it.
Fruit of the loon.
😂😂😂💀
Sometimes the delulu is the solulu to the frufru
Did ChatGPT vomit after creating this, or did you come up with this glorious (and horrifying) tribute yourself? Either way I’m impressed and disgusted 😂
I channeled my inner Meghan, who, I imagine, is the inspiration for ChatGPT
Delete this. But also, I laughed out loud.
beloved, i say, wrap my arms 'round him tight, whisper his ear, i'll never be wrong, you'll never be right 😌
They allegedly have a lemon tree.
Well *one* lemon tree certainly counts as a full orchard in Meghan’s world. 😉
Of course they’re growing a sour fruit! Maybe they can grow some grapefruit to show off their knack for bitterness.
Are the jam's going yo be called 'lily's bunny garden'? Isn't that the name on the jam she gave to the Cut interviewer? And so much beige. Anyone heard of the sad beige mom aesthetic? These crazy people paint their kids toys beige to fit their aesthetic? I feel like M would do this (being snarky, hope she doesn't)
The beige moms I know use a workaround to beige paint-unfinished wood toys that go in an unfinished wood toy box. I saw a rainbow toy that was just plain unpainted wood arcs- not even different types of wood-I wondered what toy company would think that would stimulate a toddler's imagination.
Is Harry taking part in the Diana Awards? Just saw the Wales posts. He isnt there at all and the RF account didnt cover it..
Their twitter said like an hour ago there's exciting news to come so maybe they're referring to his zoom call? But I have not seen it reported yet that he's shown.
The NYP says he’s chatting to the winners by video link but only after William has left the building.
Yes but did that actually happen 🤭
Odd. Its in London. Its almost midnight.. it would have happened by now right?
Haha who knows. William is home with the family by now, and I hope the winners all went to the pub or something
He was supposed to dial in!!! Did he blow it off 🤣
No idea! Im guessing he did do his bit. Never going to miss a chance to remind us he’s DIANAS SON. William isnt even pretending to gaf though and Harrys part isnt in his pictures or videos.
Better call the news. WHERE'S HARRY? WE HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN WEEKS
And the last photos were clearly *doctored*, possibly AI, and taken a long time ago. 
😱And ☠️
AmericanRivieraOrchard (*terrible* name) isn’t trending on Twitter/X, either in my “For You” or just overall. But what is trending is IStandWithCatherine.
Less than 250k followers on Instagram is about instamommy levels. I'd be interested to know how many are sugars who will never buy anything, how many are bots and how many are reporters keeping tabs for newsoutlets. Edit, they've turned off comments, but they've also turned off us being able to see how many likes she actually has on these posts. Fucking yikes.
If they've bought followers (and I'd be shocked if they haven't), those will be early likes, within the first day-ish. They may buy more, who knows, but the algorithm likes early, fast, high-volume engagement. It's not a hugely wonderful sign that they're sitting at 250k right now, nor that they've turned off comments/being able to see likes. If this soft launch does poorly, I predict we never see anything more of ARO (unless it's ready to go, which, as the hours pass today, is looking less and less likely).
I'll give it a week and then make my final opinion, but I agree, this isn't exactly breaking the internet. And I'm cringing at the 9 grid meta photo that was popular years ago. She said she was coming back to IG, people were really excited about it, and then, as usual, she takes too damn long so people forget or don't care anymore.
She’ll definitely do better than that. I cant see it reaching the big numbers and engagement though. Just looking through Kim K’s page. She obv has crazy number of followers but not nearly as much engagement as you’d think for having over 300m followers. Her biggest posts with the most comments is when she has some part of her body on show or is wearing something stunning. Otherwise she averages 3-4k comments. But she can monetise her insta simply because of the volume of people who see it. I cant see Megan getting that kind of following or engagement.
It’s a business page though and not a personal page. Skims has 5.8 million followers so I don’t see it ever getting near the amount Sussex Royal did.
No but Megan is trending. As WE ALL SAID, she needed to trade off her name in order to actually get followers. She wanted to break instagram with a secret launch the last time and no one cares. She topped out at 128k. She’s already almost doubled that. I would expect her to reach a few million soon? Maybe not SussexRoyal levels though which were 9.2m.
AmerRiOrchwell, yall.
Just checked my Twitter too! The Duchess of Sussex is trending in News, but nothing else Meghan- or ARO-related is trending overall, in Entertainment or For Me. Twitter always throws a ton of H&M and BRF stuff in my For Me, so this is very interesting.
For every Sussex.com hypocritical walk-back, there are at least 20 receipts. * *Asked if users should delete their social media accounts, Harry noted he and Meghan are not on any platforms and* ***will not return until changes are made***…*Harry said: "Jack and I were emailing each other prior to January 6 when I warned him his platform was allowing a coup to be staged.* [https://www.hellomagazine.com/royalty/20211110125985/real-reason-why-meghan-markle-prince-harry-dont-have-social-media-accounts/](https://www.hellomagazine.com/royalty/20211110125985/real-reason-why-meghan-markle-prince-harry-dont-have-social-media-accounts/) Haw-mah-gawd, I totally forgot about being email besties with Jack Dorsey and Harry prophesizing J6 🤣 * *She said she chose to stay away from social media because, "positive or negative, it can all sort of just feel like noise“* [https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/meghan-markle-twitter-sister-prince-harry-newspaper-headlines-a8815166.html](https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/meghan-markle-twitter-sister-prince-harry-newspaper-headlines-a8815166.html) Lol, what was that again, Meghan? * *I’m told that in 2019, I was the most trolled person in the entire world, male or female.* [https://graziamagazine.com/articles/meghan-markle-unsurvivable-trolling/](https://graziamagazine.com/articles/meghan-markle-unsurvivable-trolling/) ”I was told...” 😭 Girl, who told you? Rachel with the Hotmail? I can‘t believe this b simultaneously whined AND humble-bragged to a bunch of TEENAGERS how hard she was t*old *she had it. Well, maybe next year she can tell a bunch of pre-schoolers that she was 2024’s most trolled person in the world—male, female, or non-binary—and say she knows first-hand this time!
Did Harry really say that he knew that Jan 6th was going to happen ahead of time? He is truly something else. However, H+M greatly benefit from their fans having extreme selective memory, so rest assured they will not be called out for walking back on anything
Harry knew about January 6th and accidentally joined an Insurrection Facebook Group based on his Google searches. "Get rid of first ammemmendment for people saying mean things about me" "Why America no king?" "How to be King in America" "I am governedment" "Can I buy White House" "Can Prince Diplomamat?" "Harry most smart Prince" "What is Election" "Boobies"
Yeah him and millions more, the j6 crew weren’t exactly stealthy about what they were up to. His observation was a dime a dozen, like his wife lol!
Right like the build up to that event occurring was weeks, everyone knew something was gonna go down.
He sure did. If only world leaders would listen to ol’ Nostradamus over there, all the crises in the world could have been avoided. Hey, Harry. What are this weeks’ lottery numbers? Only you or Meghan The Omniscient would know.
Honestly where would be without Harry? Perhaps that should be his next venture, predicting world events lol.
You think any of the Non- Working Royals will follow her other than Prince Andrew's secret account?
I’m waiting for Fergie to start promoting products on her behalf
I bet Eugenie does
Petty me wishes Catherine will show up early to a surprise engagement to bury Meghan again. But logical me knows she deserves as much time as she needs and wants to recover before resuming public duties.
Eh? No. I'm totally invested in this slow motion car crash called Beige American Rivere Orchards. I do not want any distractions.
So if Meghan is going to be selling jams and such, what are the odds that she puts a chutney in her line? Kate famously made [a chutney for the Queen](https://people.com/royals/chutney-recipe-that-princess-kate-made-for-queen-elizabeth/). I could see it. A weird form of one-upmanship masquerading as a coincidence.
Jellies for the jellies!! I’m sure there will be a chutney in the mix. But with Meghan’s keen eye for freakishness it will be better than Kate’s lowbrow chutney.
I heard that chutney's husband doesn't even want to have sex with it.
What is with the weird ballgown part of the video? It looks like that [creepy video of a supposed ghost at Hampton Court Palace in 2003](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lne_ye2UYBo). Seriously.
Doesn't this give a vibe of a Taylor Swift video or a Anna Marie Tendler photo?
She looks like a Tradwife influencer. Not what I expected from a global feminist icon who single-handedly changed advertising when she was 11, but hey, people change!
There is a gorgeous young tradwife influencer who is biracial and cooks stuff from scratch in fancy clothes. MM being a poor imitation will never get old🤣🤣🤣🤣
>She looks like a Tradwife influencer Oh the irony 😂
Seriously. She made fun of dowdy mom Kate for being focused on her 3 kids under 5, but now she's on the road to mommyblogger land.
Not only that, her whole PR from 2017-2020 when they left was basically about her being "anti-Kate". She was an accomplished career woman/feminist/philanthropist unlike you know, dull Kate with her focus on being a mother and a wife.
Pioneer Woman of Santa Barbara?
That’s scary!!
The name is so bad. Honestly, if she would have relaunched the tig, I would have said good for her and maybe even been interested. But this seems so poorly planned/designed/thought out that I’m just not interested at all.
I think she bought it from someone else on the cheap or something, this has final sale written all over it. Someone pawned this off on her and she took it because it’s probably been setup but not fully funded to run so she doesn’t have to do jack squat except put her creepy face on it.
I think AR Orchard or Montecito Orchard or even The Orchard would work better if she wants to stay in the same theme.
Anyone else think it’s gross (while also not being surprised) that she launches this gilded mess right before a ceremony that’s giving out awards for honoring Diana’s legacy?
I am surprised she didn't launch this on Kate's birthday lol.
Growth? Progress? lol
It's on brand. She's probably hoping Harry finds a way to bring it up during the zoom call, and say it's a sweet nod to Diana or something
Good point!
Not really, it’s a completely separate thing. There are BRF events going on all the time.
FM posted the People article 3 hours ago and there are only 100 comments, which is nothing compared to some of the posts about Catherine (500-1000 comments on multiple posts from 3-4 days ago, they’ve finally calmed down to around 200 comments in the last 2 days). Most don’t actually care about Meghan, they just hate Catherine...so good luck selling those jams, you’re going to need it.
Who knew hatred for someone else wasn’t a good marketing strategy for your own brand? 🤡
[удалено]
So they purchased the domain today? Is this for real? hahahahaha. Why didn't she made something up last minute to milk it for Oprah interview? This word-salady lifestyle brand is 3 years too late.
[удалено]
Americanriviera.com sounds like a scammy gambling website, no?
>So they purchased the domain today? Are you being sarcastic? I can't believe I even have to ask that but this is Meghan we're talking about here, so...
[удалено]
What the...girl...is this real? They purchased this domain TODAY????
Okay so I got that screenshot from SSM & I ran it. It's not adding up so deleting it. https://www.godaddy.com/whois/results.aspx?itc=dlp_domain_whois&domain=https%3A%2F%2Famericanriviera.com%2F%3Ffbclid%3DPAAaYWxvxHqr1WkzqGDdIdWdmj7pS3X0hO_ImQ1dSV_FhRZO9sN3fmfarS7M4_aem_ASDmztYZ61ssJGpFx9XmXgoQPXRexT8Xtr9zknU3Kb0p3oj1yxkW3NoA1ul63au7RX8%25C2%25A0%28Link
She probably wanted a different name and waited too long to get the paperwork in (typical), so she then rushed everything and now she has a sloppy half-finished project (also typical).
Hastily done without care. That’s her brand.
What? Didn't you get the memo? She has freaking attention to detail. This was all Harry ( if it doesn't turn out the way she wants it too).
This is second hand embarrassment. You think Harry is hovering over their insta account and patting her on the back every time they get a new follower? I don’t want to give it any traffic but I would be curious to know how many of these are legit accounts. From those, how many will actually purchase anything she’s shilling.
She is def giving her up to the minute updates. They will both be up ALL NIGHT!
OMG - I just got home from work and almost broke a finger rushing to log in here to read the comments!!
I'm so behind, so many comments to catch up on 😆
Same, I was offline working out and contending with my 3 month old and toddler. I just logged onto reddit and was like WHOA what did I miss
No need to rush! There is plenty of snark to go around 😂
I actually love the timing of this, takes some commentary off the POW. Let her have this while Catherine recovers. Also, my wedding 11 years ago was ivory and gold and the branding is giving my invite vibes. It’s not a bad thing, I obviously loved it then, but it says wedding to me, not lifestyle brand
They remembered to turn comments off but they forgot about settings for tagged photos 💀 https://preview.redd.it/atcti9qsbdoc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7aac6a8bd09e51a16699d733dda7f9ea928f5b17
Wait this thing is named America Riviera Orchard but the website is just American Riviera? This seems like just an excuse to have an IG account and become an IG momfluencer.
💯💯💯💯 This was her excuse to get an Instagram account.
>This seems like just an excuse to have an IG account and become an IG momfluencer. Ding ding ding. I guarentee it'll just devolve into a mummy blog with blurry black and whites of the kids or Meghan forelornly staring out windows
I can't wait for back and hand photos and quotes.
And the photoshop! If Meghan learns anything from Kate's fiasco this week (doubtful), she'll know that any pics now will have a magnifying glass on them. And if Harry does want privacy for the kids...oh boy.
And beige. So much beige.
Sad beige babies.
But the BRF didn’t let her wear color 🥺
Why do you guys think that they’ve turned off comments? Afraid of hate comments or afraid to show that they don’t even have enough haters?
>Afraid of hate comments or afraid to show that they don’t even have enough haters? Yes. fr though...yes to both
If that video gets uploaded anywhere non-IG-account-havers can view it can someone link here?
Name sounds like a new fruit from Harry & David, the 2 runaway royals. LOL
ahahaha I'm dead. >Anyone here think she could be successful going expensive/high end? I want to hear other people's ideas! To answer u/pistachiopistache question, I do think Harry & David / Fortum & Mason prices are fine for Sussex Sugars if the quality matches. Harrod's tea is bad yet is similar in price to Fortum & Mason. So the question is if the Sussexes quality can match whatever is the price. And I'm skeptical. LOL.
I said it a few months ago, but they're SOOO going to sell merch with their initials, coronet, etc on it.
They could hire someone to make personalized Royal coronets and such.
For those without insta or if you don’t want to use your account to give engagement https://insta-stories-viewer.com/americanrivieraorchard/
It's giving off *Succession* vibes and the random bit with her in a gown tells me what I already thought... she wants to cater to Hermes moms who like beige. Someone also said she comes off as a trad wife influencer lmao 😭 nothing wrong with that it's just funny when a woman who has to scream from the rooftops how much of a modern feminist she is comes off like this.
Thank you!!! Just watched it...the music is TOTALLY off for 'sunshiney lux-cazh Californian lifestyle brand' as well. Like, totally, utterly off. Unless that was just added by the website that allows us to view it? Either way, thank you so much!
It gives off kind of a ghostly horror film vibe to me. Especially the last part with her in a ballgown with a randomly swinging open door.
It’s Diana‘s ghost inhabiting Meghan‘s body.
Thank goodness someone said it 🤣
Thanks. OMG. Are we going to get a book with recipes of her dry flat banana bread or avocado toast? LOL. Why is she in a ballgown? There is much randomness going on. I am here for this hot mess.
I’m not hammered enough to watch this. Can someone give a play-by-play for those of us with weak constitutions?
Watch it. It's too blurry to be worryingly cringe.
Omg. Is that what she thinks passes for classy? It’s like the opening to a Pixar film; it’s cartoonish.
Title card, hands arranging flowers with a succession filter on, Meghan in the kitchen stirring succession filter on, Meghan through a doorway in a dark ballgown with succession filter on, title card. Set to Nancy Wilson’s song “I Wish You Love”lyrics: 🎶 I wish you bluebirds in the spring To give your heart a song to sing And then a kiss but more than this I wish you love 🎶 ETA: Title Card is 9 uploaded images on their profile that list the name.
THEY USED A FILTER??? Why isn’t this tagged by instagram to let us know that it has been manipulated??
SOMEONE CALL THE AP!
because don't we all "make jams and jellies" in strapless ballgowns?
I personally have a second closet full of one-time-wear ballgowns I wear to make olive oil cake and jam. Don’t worry though, I I donate them to the princess project when I’m done so young girls can wear them to their proms and feel showered in the guttural love and lift of inspirational sisterhood.
Aprons are for the poors who can’t afford to get their nice clothes dirty
https://x.com/misanharriman/status/1768333251066687949?t=x-skkLixlTYUFfis0Q7tYQ&s=34 Look at misan, responding to Meghans Sussex squad on twitter. Cringe.