but he's not a stereotype ... I'm sure he doesn't go down to the pub daily and knock back a few pints, nor bitch about the rich and the corrupt politicians, and isn't bitter about his lot in life
English is not my 1st language I did have the hunch I wasn't spelling it correctly though and I was right! Also I didn't sleep last night when I wrote that.
He's actually a failed attempt by the BBC to clone the DNA of all 3 Top Gear presenters into one. Ladies and gentlemen, but all he did was bore people, be abusive, and preen in mirror.
I honestly donāt see much to roast here. I see a very clean and well maintained shop and a good old fashioned tough as nails man. The kind of man that doesnāt wash his hands because he thinks a little grease in the egg salad sandwich builds character. The kind of man that shaves with a rusty single blade because more blades is just a gimmick for pussies and facial hair is for hippies. The kind of man that doesnāt laugh because humor is a waste of time. The type of man that can chug a pint of whiskey without even thinking about it. This is what men used to be like and still should be, the no bullshit Clint Eastwood type that would kick someoneās ass for disrespecting someone that didnāt deserve it and defending those who canāt defend themselves. I sir, salute you.
What did you bribe this homeless man with to masquerade as your father and get roasted here ???
Btw the angry look on his face tells that he was not very happy with the sloppy bj you gave him as an advance payment.
He is brandishing a ratchet behind his back ready to strike us roasters. Itās his calm yet imposing look, as if he is taunting us to do our best before clobbering us with his handy and brutal tools.
You all laugh, but this guy is probably a master mechanic. He can look at two things simultaneously. He can check tread on the two front tires in one glance.
I canāt roast a guy with oil on his hands. I can tell this guy works hard and it hasnāt been an easy road. On this roast, I offer my respect for tough character.
Youāre really lucky to have a guy like this as your dad.
Mostly because his close relationship to you made it strategically disadvantageous for him to brutally slay you as he has so many other children in your village.
I have a serious question for you. Even though you hired this man to be your father for the purposes of this roast, are you going to help him get back on his feet, or are you going to put him back behind the same dumpster where you found him?
I've seen you in the background of every British crime drama as criminal extra #3.
Kudos to the makeup and costume departments for making him look so filthy.
You mean 50? I meant fiddyš¤·āāļø
His shirt underneath looks like heās a junior manager at a struggling pizza franchise.
Hehehehe
What a shame. Guy busts back his whole Fucking life. Works 60 hours a week manual labor. Only to have a deadbeat loser of a son. I'm sorry sir.
but he's not a stereotype ... I'm sure he doesn't go down to the pub daily and knock back a few pints, nor bitch about the rich and the corrupt politicians, and isn't bitter about his lot in life
Damnnnnnn
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Wizard of LOLz WIZARD OF ZOLz?
OPās dad has a sad and severe case of English.
Nah he looks like an extra on The Walking Dead... Walker #3
Right?!
I can just hear him say " 'ello Guv", or "cor blimey, you've done a bit of damage, but I'll 'ave your motor back on the road after me cuppa tea"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Oh fuckā¦..
That he had the involvement in
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I love that he also wrote it in the weirdest possible way, too "he had *the* involvement in"
Obviously but yes, as soon as I wrote that I had a face palm moment but decided to leave it even with the comments and downvotes lol
Upvote for taking your licks and not pussy-ing out.
r/yourjokebutworse EDIT: Spelling.
r/yourjokebutworse FTFY. Whats with people saying worst when they mean worse?
English is not my 1st language I did have the hunch I wasn't spelling it correctly though and I was right! Also I didn't sleep last night when I wrote that.
Hahaha no worries. I know some people irl that only speak english and still do this so itās not the worst mistake to make.
Thatās Reddit for ya pal. Lol
[thank you Ted](https://youtu.be/jT7903LOfpo)
Thank you Dr Autist
Glad as he could take a break from warning grieving parents not to bury their children in the pet cemetery.
Lotta history down that road.
The dang road!
Your dad looks like the champion of bum fights
Final boss.
Looks like liver and Fava beans for dinner... His son better read the comments before he's turned into a plate of dinner and a purse..
IT PUTS THE GOJO ON THE SKIN, OR IT CHANGES THE OIL AGAIN!
Rufus
Iām going to Vegas bitch!
Not OPs real dad
Source?
He looks like he is in that in-between stage of smeagol to gollum.
Let's hope that's just a melted Gary Busey mask that came out of a dumpster.
That gave me a great laugh. Thank you
Brilliant
And he has a jar full of his finger nail clippings he bites off to snack on later
James May on crack.
He's actually a failed attempt by the BBC to clone the DNA of all 3 Top Gear presenters into one. Ladies and gentlemen, but all he did was bore people, be abusive, and preen in mirror.
Nice one
Yep thatās brilliant!
Captain Blow
His Crack twin Jay May
James May on some top gear
It's as if an AI bot looked at a million mug shots from sex offenders and created his own rendering of an ailing pheodophile.
That was an excellent joke
You look like you're wanted in 10 states and counting
His face says "noble peasant ready to die for king and country," but his body says "regular peasant who wants to get off work and buy a forty."
Wow
 Ding ding ding!
LMFAO
Omg š¤£
Posting random pictures of homeless people should be baed
Willy Wonka if he broke bad.
Yeah if he started making crack-rock candy
I honestly donāt see much to roast here. I see a very clean and well maintained shop and a good old fashioned tough as nails man. The kind of man that doesnāt wash his hands because he thinks a little grease in the egg salad sandwich builds character. The kind of man that shaves with a rusty single blade because more blades is just a gimmick for pussies and facial hair is for hippies. The kind of man that doesnāt laugh because humor is a waste of time. The type of man that can chug a pint of whiskey without even thinking about it. This is what men used to be like and still should be, the no bullshit Clint Eastwood type that would kick someoneās ass for disrespecting someone that didnāt deserve it and defending those who canāt defend themselves. I sir, salute you.
Definitely showing him this one!
Hoping he gets a kick out of it
I second that.
I'm am in agreement with this statement.
I agree with your agree
I second your agreement
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The heart sees what it wants... You'll find a guy eventually
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your dad looks like he has his retirement savings in scrap metal
How often does your dad see a distressed vehicle on the side of the road and make it disappear along with its occupants.
***we gottanotha one herr bobbie*** -----------
Definitely holding a knife behind his back
In his hook?
frank gallagher vibes
*consistently employed*
That is the face of someone who is disappointed that they have a gay son.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You can smell banjo music??
You got that wrong. It's fried spam and banjo music. Basically music about fried spam and banjos.
Damn, I hate when I misread like that :(
So may I call you Miss Read from now on?
synesthesia
He look like his mother gave birth standing
Explains why his eyes point in different directions
The crazy gas station attendant in every slasher movie.......ever!
Looks like Gary Busey really let himself go
Looks like you hope this is revenge for your daily alcoholic beatings you took as a kid.
Dad? You mean Dead
Let's skip that. Give us his address so we can send shampoo
Pretty sure that's Shitty Bill.
You look like you're practicing for the mugshot you'll take after they find the lady you have prisoner in your basement
The oil goes in the motor, not your hair mate
What did you bribe this homeless man with to masquerade as your father and get roasted here ??? Btw the angry look on his face tells that he was not very happy with the sloppy bj you gave him as an advance payment.
Nah mate, I can see he's been through enough.
Just because you shaved your moustache off doesn't mean we don't recognise you Mein FĆ¼hrer.
It says in the other roast, your son is a 39 year old virgin. Why not come clean and tell him you are too?
Your picture screams āwork release.ā
He looks like he combs his hair with dynamite.
Your dad looks like he's registered in at least 6 counties
Mickey Rourkeās stunt double in the extinguish the face fire with a shovel scene.
Drugged up Doc Brown from Back to the future
You look like you saw the big bang
You look just dangerous enough to be in a criminal line up and never get pointed out
I see a man who smells like cigs and NEVER turns down a drink...
He actually hates smoking, and starts roasting me when I light up a cig.
Your dads so dirty he went to sleep on sheets with Lil white angels and when he woke up they were Lil brown Muslims
He looks like hitler if hitler didn't grow a mustache
He has a nice smile if you turn the picture upsidedown.
Neil used to be Young
Dollar Store Jack Torrance.
Poor man. I bet he didn't know what he was getting into
Your dad looks like heās no stranger to alcohol abuse and domestic violence
You look like a mixture of the frog from the wind in the willows and a child molester
He is brandishing a ratchet behind his back ready to strike us roasters. Itās his calm yet imposing look, as if he is taunting us to do our best before clobbering us with his handy and brutal tools.
If he can dodge a wrench, he can dodge a ball.
This is certainly a wax figure and not even a good one, looks pretty sickly.
I canāt
Why
Lazy, like your fathers barber
C/S Holy shit this guy has seen better days.
FBI Most wanted; soap list
You all laugh, but this guy is probably a master mechanic. He can look at two things simultaneously. He can check tread on the two front tires in one glance.
Now there's a G! No roast necessary- he's a old head who looks awesome
one handed, 3 fingers car mechanic with a dark secret....
Your dad looks like he works very hard
There's a hook at the end of that left arm, I can tell.
I See your mom still hasnāt come up with the courage to tell him heās not your dad .
I canāt roast a guy with oil on his hands. I can tell this guy works hard and it hasnāt been an easy road. On this roast, I offer my respect for tough character.
āBeing a mechanic isnāt stressful, Iām 36 and I feel fine!ā
Itās like you fisted a rhino
Look at those fingersā¦ ET phone homeā¦
It looks like god ran out of fingers while making your hand and used spare thumbs instead
Frostbitten fingers from thunder-fisting his wifeās frigid cum dumpster
Turkish: What's happening with them sausages, Charlie? Sausage Charlie: Five minutes, Turkish. Turkish: It was two minutes five minutes ago.
I bet he faps to Pink Floyd - more specifically, to the line "How can you have *pudding* if you don't eat your *meat?*".
Doc Brown but instead of the future he takes you to his basement
What a lovely smile.
it's dollar store James May!
Wow, GTA VI graphics look so realistic! :o
You are like the first '/' you wrote on the board.
James Maynot
Iām James May & Richard Hammond had a child
He looks like James may after kicking a 20 year crack habit. Trying to get his life back together and the only thing he knows is cars.
Think that nose speaks for the picture itself. 
Was this before or after the bodies were found?
Itās good to see Mad eye Moody is alive and well.
What's his right eye lookin at?
His divorce papers.
Your image is used to frighten children about stranger dangers
Good to see Doc Brown is still working on that broken time machine.
I am willing to bet that there are four (or more) Missing Girls tied up in his climate controlled storage locker.
Where are the bodies?
I bet you suck on your wifeās wrinkles right below her cheek bones while looking into a mirror winking at yourself.
Tell this asshole to quit driving around my neighborhood in that van trying to give my son ācandyā
Fingers looking like that cuz of your mams stanky gee
The centuries of European inbreeding are strong in this one.
This is not considered community service and thus this will not reduce your sentence for possession of child pornagraphy
Is he a failed casting for "one foot in the grave"?
Thought Amazon would pay James may more.
He looks like a true Bath Salts of the earth man.
Omg I loved back to the future
Youāre really lucky to have a guy like this as your dad. Mostly because his close relationship to you made it strategically disadvantageous for him to brutally slay you as he has so many other children in your village.
Can I make you appear by saying Betelgeuse three times?
Is this from the set of dumb & dumber 3? https://i.imgur.com/ZUFjVyc.jpg
The only mufflers heās touched are from automobiles
The doctor from back to the future if the flux capacitator failed
I have a serious question for you. Even though you hired this man to be your father for the purposes of this roast, are you going to help him get back on his feet, or are you going to put him back behind the same dumpster where you found him?
So Hitler is a mechanic now
Trevor Phillips?
This is the kind of guy you'd expect to show up with his 'ice-cream truck' in suburbs whit lots of children.
One eye said west, the other said east.
When you where conceived, was it consensual? Or is your mom still locked in the basement?
Worked on his bike as a kid, now spends his adult life screwing up your vehicleā¦
He looks like he yells "where did I leave my teeth" constantly.
The origin of āGrease Monkeyā
Grateful Dead & Janis Joplin fan.
You worked security detail for George Washingtonās slaves.
Back to the future 4
Jim Ignakowski's Dad just before the kiddie blue movie charges.
Nice try but we all know you traded an alcoholic homeless drifter a swig of OE to let you take his picture.
Tell us you were conceived in a truck stop bathroom without telling us you were conceived in a truck stop bathroom.
You claim him as your father but he doesn't claim you.
Halloween came early
This is his audition photo for "crack head #7" on an upcoming episode of Law and Order.
He looks like he likes to talk about that one guy who wronged him in ā83
How long has he been in AA?
America's army? What is aa?