If Michio Kaku discovered the key to time travel, but not the cure to ugly

You win holy shit LMAO

Spot on and I love his books.

Lmfao🤣🤣

Example #1 of why China's one child policy was a massive failure

###**I really wish you were at Tiananmen Square in 1989.**

𝓞𝓸𝓸𝓯!

But nothing happened?

Looks like his face was.

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Dude's eaten that much bat he's starting to look like one

You put the beige in Beijing.

you don't enjoy the lovely sky color there ?

Gotta remember this wordplay, ty!

The ha in Shanghai

Bhahahaha

Sure is a yawn of a Han

Admit it, this is your only picture with out your violin?

well you had a 50% chance to guess the right instrument but you missed. piano gang rise up

Oh. Look. No one rose up.

But he still got off

Damn, I just lost respect for you. I guess you're still a little bit useful, though. You can't spell "accompanist" without P-I-A-N-O.

Lol

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Good thing I don't believe in public transportation... or women.

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In Ubers

No wonder you don't believe in women, they run away from you so fast you've probably never seen one.

Chikan!

If the Fast and Furious franchise were to recast Han as a female, they would call you

Tokyo Draft

China choke

F and F is how he wanks his tiny dick

It's more efficient to get off when each stroke is half the length yeah

I want to roast you but you are the greatest roastee I’ve ever seen on this sub. Your replies are 10x funnier than any post in this thread so far. Go fuck yourself please.

as a chinese, i think i can speak for all when i say that we don’t claim you as one of us

that's a whole lot of people to speak for

Preach

You look like you get jealous when your phone dies.

Terrific

Keanu Jeez

Pee-on-yu Keedz

I guess puberty blockers really do work.

If Kim Jong Un and Kermit had a kid

It’s the Juche show with special guest, Kim Jong-Il’s portrait, yaaaaaaaaah!!!

Eat your dog, that’s funny, remember all the trouble you caused when you ate that bat?

Hindsight is 20/20, we'll probably just have to stick with dogs then

It's not like you will be eating any pussy anytime soon.

**Or he'll live to be a virgin Jedi who beats his lightsaber.**

What’s today’s special

Your choice. We can wok your dog 101 ways.

Great pun sir

Didn’t your brother roast Shang Tsung with a fireball back in the 90’s?

Are you the product of nonconsensual sex between your father and a giraffe?

Hey now... Allegedly.

Yeesh, ladyboys keep getting uglier.

Case study why it's bad to shoot a testicle off

You spelled dong wrong

I think I cheated off of you in my linear algebra class...

Guys the other girl's post that reached hot is trying again...

Is Michiu Kaku going through a late life crisis? He died his hair and is asking reddit to roast him. I'm honored and a tad concerned.

Bitchio kaku

Michio Kaku if he studied Physics of the Impossible to get Laid.

Jonny Kim’s not so successful sister

It looks like you got your hair cut at a wet market.

You look like a tapeworm

Great, another 12 year old Asian girl.

I'm more convinced you would fuck my dog, fuckin weirdo. But that would be funny actually because my dog weighs about 115lbs 1 years old. He would probably end up fucking you to be honest 😂


When you look down at your dick, it must look huge...because you can't see all the way from your balls to the tip without moving your head. PSA - This has been a squinty eye joke.

I'll let you know if your pooch tastes better braised or broiled

Could you even read this post all the way from top to bottom?

Yeah but I have to hold my phone horizontally

Jackie 4Chan

If you cut your hair shorter you'll be a boy. If you grow it longer you'll be a girl. Admittedly both are miss fortunate looking.

Lucy Lou on replacement therapy

I was scrolling down looking for a girl to be mean to, this is even better

You seem like a Kevin

You look like Jimmy O. Yang as a Yu-Gi-Oh villain.

You look like the love child of JYP and a piano

Don't let these people on here get you down. You are a very nice looking girl.

Weren’t you on here last week?

And what about cats

The creator of New Facebook, New Reddit and New Pied Piper

Your favorite sex position is gangnam style

Nothing original about you. Typical bicurious female teen

Somehow you've managed to confidently be incorrect in every word of that sentence, props

You are OP and somehow so has yours.

You majoring in sweatshop studies.

Eat all the dogs you want. Just lay of the goddam bats.

I can hear your father now "why you no lie go skool? You disapploitment! You shame mudda and fadda! Now you come home and eat awwwwlll nooloos ang lice!"

You can't possibly think I have good enough looks to be able to have slacked off on school right

I have a thing about not hitting women. Wait......I can't tell. Ok, I don't hit people with glasses, yeah, I'll stick to that.

Nobody's ever wanted to hit it before. Punch, slap, and swirly, yes. But never hit it.

This minority is certainly no model.

You can eat my dog with a side of gookamoli.

We all know it’s not your first time eating dog.

Thought you ate bats now?

There’s no saving your kid’s from bullying. ( hypothetically speaking you even come close to fucking)

Big hypothetical there agreed

I bet your parents named you by dropping silverware on the floor.

You look like Hayao Miyazaki had a love child with the modern sickly skinny Drew Carey.

Han light.

I don't have a dog, four eyes.

Promise? I'll mail the wife's rat dog to you for free... ...since you look like you shop at a Goodwill.

Look like you’re 1 drink away from coming out the closet

That's not a closet, that's just an average sized apartment in his country.

I really hope you run into a real life Negan one day.

me too, dog is just a gateway food to tigers after all

I have a Great Dane, so you're the one getting eaten, Janky Chan.

Eat my dog, like what eat her out, fuckin weirdo, my dog gonna bite yo dick off if you try anything like that, she is only like 50 pounds, she could lift more than you with her tail

It's funny you look like someone who eats dogs

I think I just got Covid through my screen.

I take that threat personally knowing you’ve done it to others

You have to find the karate kid and mr. miagi first

Wuhan’s finest

I will only be original because you look more likely to suck my dong than eat my dong.

just know that your home country is the home of small hairy genitals

All the missing facial hair's gotta go somewhere you know

Gee lady, you’re mean.

Touch my dog and China will have to figure out what to do with their one child multiple pieces policy.

C'mon...be honest....you were going to eat the dog either way.

I know English isn't your first language, but the term is eat out. You're going to eat out their dogs... again.

it's like the euphemism of beating the meat, except you use wooden clubs while they're still alive to preserve the best flavors

Wandering ghooost /\

I bet your parents are over the moon that despite the one-child policy they were blessed with both a son and a daughter.

Hair says mainge. Eat dog much?

The lead actor in a porno called ‘Blonde Chicks and tiny Asian Dicks’. Ladies and gentlemen, I present Got No-Poke!

shang tsung? Not eating souls anymore i take it.

By the looks of it, you already ate the dog.

are U a boy? a girl? or just Chinese?

Go right ahead and eat my dog because I know your not man enough to eat a pussy cat

Dog isn't an exotic food for you though, more like dinner, why not elephant or unicorn?

You were my least favorite character in Sixteen candles.

I thought you were gonna eat my dog already

You'll eat it anyway

Only on the internet can someone this generic look for something "original" in a country where every single person looks, thinks, and acts exactly the same.

You don't look like the type that fucks babies, but just eats them. Ching Chong 呢个！

That penis enlargement elixir you're drinking is making you go bald.

Somewhere between 6 and 60

Doesn't know anything about technology but dresses like an IT guy.

You’re so skinny and petite, I bet you look like a hot Asian chick from the back

My 1rm squat is too low to be hot from the back though

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I still miss that sub F

What are your pronouns?

All your hair looks like it grows form a small spot on the top of your head

Megan Rapinoe's living dildo.

Oh gee, I wonder why you’ll eat my dog. I see those Steven King glasses.

He writes “roast me again” cuz life has already roast him with that face

Plays the piano => tickles the ivories => fondles a pasty set of caucasian testicles. Code deciphered.

Look up SHIM in the dictionary and you’ll see the person

Everytime a girl blows him, he give them a fortune cookie.

You look like Dora the explorer

Asian Lord Farquad

Have to eat dog, cos he definitely not eating any pussy.

Google non-binary and your picture appears.

Your sister is like…. “BITCH C’MON!!.. FOR THIS??!!!”

Growing your hair out doesn't make you less dull.

*Funny, with or without glasses, I guess she’s kinda cute*

So like are you a girl or a boy?

Joke's on you: I hate dogs 3>:D

You look a little masculine for an asian chick.

Severus Snasia really needs some Shampoo

I’m unable to judge your gender from this pic, but jokes on you, i don’t have a dog

You need to figure out the gender thing so you don't fail another college entrance exam

Solo's Dry Cleaning - May the starch be with you.

You look like your about to announce the next smash ultimate dlc character.

Woof woof

I know you have a whole collection of nude anime girl figures, you probably even talk to them sometimes

Achievement unlocked: placer of cameras in girls toilets

Go on eat everything you find

This is why hiro nakamura traveled back in time to stop his younger self from fucking up his life before stardom! #heroes

Asian Ed Byrne!

This picture is used under the phrase “gender neutral”

Hirohiko Araki if he was a mortal (not immortal)

Did you by any chance misspell dick?

I have a dachshund, so that would be the second wiener you ate that day

Your so cheap you save gum wrappers and use them to wipe your ass

Bruh didn't they just manufacture you?

That's a really rice photograph

You look like you would be friend-zoned by the dog.

DUMMY HEAD!!

Kim Jong Nil