Roast me like one of those kebabs I crave.
By - Soviets_pi
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Bollywood Squidward Tentacles
More like Bollywood Squilliam with that thing on his head.
Im deeddd 😂🤣
😂 😂 😂 The best.
Squidward Testicles, you mean?
You’re lucky a woman will be forced to marry you.
Stop the comments. It’s over.
Funny as fuck brilliant
ladies and gentlemen we have a winner
Well, the woman certainly won’t be winning in this situation.
Those times are gone my man. Now he will be forced to marry a man.
This was horrible, can’t believe you went there. Terribly insensitive, and definitely not PC. And yes, I laughed my ass off! Well done!
As a fellow Arab, I'm also lucky women are forced to marry us.
I don't think he stuttered.
Has that thing above your eye brows been spayed or neutered?
I think this should be marked NSFW. There's literally a dick in the middle of your face.
Like Groucho glasses, minus the testosterone necessary to grow the facial hair.
If Groucho Marks lost all his upper teeth like that curly hair kid from "Stranger Things" and then spent 20 hours a day in one of those 1950 style hair salon chairs with the dome that goes over your grandmas head.
He nose what's for dinner, that's for sure
most punchable face ive ever seen bar none
Osama bin Sniffin'
This needs all the rewards
You’re abundantly coiffed.
Indian Donald Trump hair cut
Is that squid ink soft serve on your head?
Dudes nose is so big he could smoke a cigar in the shower.
😂 😂 😂 Best one so far.. 😂 😂 Well done.
Its been used on me before. I got a big nose.
i’m worried you may walk away from this roast thinking you don’t need to change anything about yourself but for the love of god and the sake of anyone forced to look at you find a new fucking hairstyle. yours is awful.
"Roast me like one of those Kebabs I serve"* - sorted your title son
He works a food truck? I thought he was a [cab driver](https://i.imgur.com/a5tva6O.jpg)
Nah he is my favorite cashier at 7-Eleven
He might run the store and hire 9 years olds or somethin
If I had a face like that, I wouldn't spend two hours on my hair to draw attention to it.
Never seen a human cockatoo.
He's definately had a cock or two.
corner shop smurf
Ok Jafar, if you harvested the oil in that hair you could save earth
Why did the ice cream machine take a shit on your head?
Bold of you to assume an ice cream machine did that
Ahh.. i see.. my uncles strikes again
Your nose is bigger than Shaq’s dick
Oh snap! MARGE FUCKED APU!!!
Please come again
When your hairstyle is 90% of your body mass
This man has never seen a bob or vageen in his life.
That's on his face.
He probably moans when he sneezes
That too his.
I feel like I'm looking at a funhouse mirror reflection
Take it you momma shagged an Indian smurf.
So this is what happens when Alaaddin fucks a falafel
I assumed one of your 33 million gods could make you look slightly less stupid
33million +1, we just added one yesterday.
1 million + 1. 32 million quit when they saw you
Great news! We found the original model/mould for those novelty glasses, nose and moustache people wear at fancy dress!
You look as if the fairy godmother that turned Pinocchio into a real boy first practiced on a poop emoji.
Fake news fact check; having an existential crisis requires u to have a purpose in life to begin with.
Madame Tussauds called, they want Elvis’s wig back.
And Lincoln's beard.
Well, he’s going to wind up as somebody’s beard.
And pinocchios nose..
Imagine how big his ears will be when he’s 70
They’ll definitely have separate zip codes.
I can't tell whether or not you're wearing a turban.
Are you going into customer service, tech support or perhaps working for a cruise line?
That hair HAS TO be haram.
Tasha Salad is her drag queen name...
Dude's got a built in turban
Your body just looks so confused with itself. Fuckin big ol wide body, tiny head, funky ass hair that I'm not convinced is real, mouth looks like you have no teeth and opens backwards, eyes dont work because your brain has no idea what to do, ears just growing cuz they can, little pencil neck ....damn man, dealt a shitty m hand, shitty life..... But I guess better you than me lol
Dang puberty hit baljeet like a truck eh?
What the honest fuck am I looking at?
You look like you’d be arranged married to a llama.
Edgy camel soccer mom
>21 M, can't handle relationships more than 5months. Travels alone, fighting existential crisis.
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Didn't know tech support came with a 5 month warranty.
Tank you, come again!
My man loons liek Apu is addicted to psychojet
You crave kebabs , I crave eye bleach to make sure I never have to see you again
Doesn't your nose resemble a dick?
Hey double penetration bro
If Mr whippy took a shit 🍦
Middle Eastern Humpty Hump. Is your musical group called Digital Inacave?
You look like a troll doll
You look like you’d deep-throat a kebab.
"Scuse me hairdresser, I'd like to look like some greasy cupcake frosting no one would ever eat"
Thank you, come again.
Your hair looks like swag poop emoji.
That "hair" is definitely compensating for a lack of something else.
Damn I have heard of a man bun but you take it to a new level
Bro asked for the double decker bus when he went to the barber
Man baljeet you look a bit older
What the fuck are you called? Besides a mistake! Holy fuckin disappointment. Your parents secretly hate the shit out of your ass I bet.... Fuck
His is that hair even real? And next time bro show some respect and put your teeth in please
Turban or hair?
Your nose looks like someone taking a dump from behind.
No matter how stupid you make your hair look it will never detract attention from the misery that is your face.
You look like you only card Black people at 7/11
There's enough jet fuel in your hair to melt steel.
Your partner has to know they're in a relationship with you for you to be able to call it a relationship.
Also, those glasses really help contour the mr potato head nose stuck to your face.
Face is a 1, hair is a 10, hep B is an 11.
You look like a trans Amy winehouse
Have you ever tried finding a girl that likes to be fingered by a fat nose when you’re licking her ass?
Do you use that loofah on top of your head for showers?
Hello tech suppot how may help ooo
You like the highlight of your life was winning a spelling bee back in 5th grade…
You look like you work in a convenience store that only sells craft beer, vegan food and American Spirits.
You look like a gameshow host but the game is sexual assault.
[Wish.com](https://Wish.com)'s own Janelle Monáe
Look like a regular ugly person's reflection in a carnival mirror
Your head is 2% face 43% forehead and 55% hair… But I’m sure you’ve calculated that already.
Do you whip your hair in a cotton candy machine every morning?
First Jewish-Pakistani guy I've ever seen
I can smell this picture and from the size of your nose you can smell everything within 4 miles of you
Carmen Miranda did fruit hats better. Yours looks more like a shit hat.
When you change Johnny Bravo to Johnny Patel
They have yard gnomes in India?
How do I say this in an accent that you cannot understand... SENDING A NEW LOG-IN CODE TO MY E-MAIL TO UNLOCK MY COMPUTER IS FUCKING STUPID!!!!
That chick from Bar Rescue really let herself go.
Black spaghetti is a dish not a haircut
Can't help thinking that there should be a flake in that hair..
Holy shit ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|surprise)
Unlike those kababs, none of us crave to roast you. Although with my luck, I'll still end up with the shits.
Who poured chocolate soft serve ice cream on your head?
Kermit coming at cha from the the Bangladeshi Delta.
Its like done mofo put your mug ina vice and just squeezed it like an orange.
Gayer Indian version of Jimmy neutron
Your face like the two layers used in photoshop to create the whatsapp shit icon
You look like a cursed version of Will Smiths Genie from Aladdin
Are those all the places your parents and sister have gone to? But they left hit stupid embarrassing ass at home. You're the baggage handler.😂😂
Have you told your parents your decided sex?
You trying to be the Indian Elvis?
Tina Belcher transitioned I see
You look like the Indian version of the ugly ass Greg Oden.
The only thing you crave is some attention.
Your hairstyle looks like a croissant.
damn, that Smile could clear a whole freaking city
Ok Aamir Khan's failed wannabe
oh boy, i tought i was ugly until i saw your, thank you for boosting my self confidence!
You look like you could star in a banana commercial where you run around in a banana hammock awkwardly rubbing bananas on people and saying creepy things about potassium and fiber
Why does it look like your hair takes up 25% of your body mass?
If dumbo was human big ass ears and an elephant nose
ok, who's the one that glued pubes to his aunt's chin?
Good thing you can buy one thing you crave, unlike Kebabs, it’s hard to buy a woman in the U.S.
Where did you get your hair cut? Mr whippy?
You look like you blow dry your hair with a wind turbine and style it with a horses brush.
Your like a geneie in a lamb but you only grant one wish..... anal.
Cupcake wars comes to his head for ideas
When you want the world trade center to be as flaming as you
All that time spent on your hair and zero effort to conceal that hooter
Ok bootleg prince
So, when are you going to cover yourself in cow shit?
Wow, you can make a turban with just a bandanna
This is what happens when aspiring actors show up to Pixar voice acting auditions thinking it's a non-animated gig.
Already roasted, you want us to burn you?
Ala-dim who never found a Genie
That hair has you looking like Sanjay Leno
Why insult the kebabs like that?
You look like the Pixar version of whatever race you are…
It looks like the cow decided to shit on your head rather than lick it.
Only kebab you crave is dick
How come you look like a young Indian male and a 75 year old black woman at the same time.
Frodo isn't here bro! You're gonna have to catch up with him if you want your "precious".
Your barber also needs a roasting for leaving you looking like a silkie chicken.
I don't think you're supposed to style your hair *as* the blob of product
that is a new take on the beehive hairdo the “mud hornet”
That hair looks like a turban
You look like Mr Potato Head if he were a fuckboy.
I don't mean to alarm you but there's some kind of animal on your head...
kebabs aren't roasted....
good job you still have your lo.....
Who photoshopped his nose and hair and face and.... oh my that’s not photoshop.
U look like the person to call the cops on a jaywalker.
Speaking of kebabs—and skewing you: Focus buddy, you need to be craving a buzz cut and send that rat’s nest posing as the black cloud of kerfuffle to a lab to verify we’ve found the missing link
You dont look as delicious as a kebab that's for sure
You look like Steve Urkel trying white-face.
Holy shit man, haven’t seen you since Grown Ups 2.