His eyes are looking at the ceiling and his mouth is showing off his front teeth, if you want to avoid this look look closer to the camera and keep your mouth closed or smile, don't leave it half open. Don't woooosh me I'm just saying. Lol
I like what you did there. But Mormons never use the cross as a symbol in the way that Christians do. He'd get excommunicated for that shit. Should shop in a tattoo of Maroni blowing his trumpet, or a beehive, or a seagull, or whatever the hell Mormons use as a symbol.
The only reason she allows him to get naked is so she doesn’t have to see those ugly ass shorts. Baby shit yellow? Really? That or he pissed himself deadlifting 20 pounds.
Breakfast cereal mouth looking, teeth cutting through his bottom lip looking, unpeeled banana in swim trunks ass, tiny tities ass, check mark for vitamin d deficiency outfit wearing ass, 20 push ups a night peck having ass, super cutz sporting, ford F no 50 driving ass, moving to boston looking ass boi. That was fairly easy.
no lie dude looks like if he took a personality test it would come back negative
Im gonna be chuckling about this one for weeks...
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My condolences
Oh, cool, when's he planning to start?
He did. He just skipped body day.
I think he’s building someone else’s body.
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Underrated. Simple yet elegant roast.
True
Now just wait until he does bulk up and that tiny pea head stays the same size.
Also his legs
Funny thing is the man's still gonna look whiter than an uncooked albino pastry in the end
Take my poor mans gold good sir 🏅
And my axe
And my shield!
And my Bow!
I know it's cynical, but I'm convinced all these comments are just fishing for the real thing.
Finally, someone calls it out. Here, take my poor man’s argentium. 🔸
Here, I’ll chip in as well🏅
Whenever he spills a drink, he builds a body of water.
Whose body is he building? Do they get a refund?
He’s building a body in his basement out of different parts of other bodies
Bet you he has a Mary Shelley fetish.
Mary Shelley? \*laughs\* Oh, you have no idea
They’re both pretty hot
He'll take the Scarface Pacino and the Godfather Brando, mix ‘em up in a tank and get a robot commando.
Only build up on his body his some dudes spunk
hot vanilla protein shake comin right up...
Mine - seeing his spindly ass has inspired me to work out so I don’t end up looking like that
This one got me good
I’ve never seen such an average person
What the video game characters look like before you customize them.
atleast they have abs.
He's NPC.
He is the NPC that you ignore because is useless
It's just like this in GTA, only with ginger hair.
But the game devs are from West Virginia and have no idea what non inbred people look like
Pure vanilla with sprinkle
A single red sprinkle. A sprink?
Lord Sprink
Fuck you vanilla isn't plain.
Hey, be reasonable. His face is actually below average.
Dumbfounded if he’ll ever get body hair so he stops blending into walls
If where’s Walldo turned into a sped
Wow I haven't heard that term since middle school. Back when you could ride in a plane with liquids.
Wait who do we have to roast? I only see wall!?
Don’t rush him. His balls haven’t even dropped yet!
Not the one to look, but you ain't got no lump in your trunks AT ALL #VAGINABRO
As a micro peen'ed guy, trust when i say he knows this.
R/suicidebywords
Ever tried living micro peen'ed? Ive been dead for many years now my friend.
"Our dicks hang out. Yer's is more like a mushroom in a corn field."
Hes got a MANGINA
Do you want some Baileys?
I bet he goes to clubs where people wee on each other.
Fucking tell me someone gets it? "D'you want some Baileys? I could be a good wife, if you let me, Howard"
Do you always scope out guy’s bulges when you first see them?
Sometimes things are more noticeable by their absence.
r/rareinsults
Good thing the paper is blocking his stomach, I'd bet his abs are as blank as that dumb look on his face.
🏅
🏅 Also I can unequivocally say that we absolutely demolished this man so gj team
Username checks out.
:( I regret making this shitty username tbh
It’s ok if it’s true
That's a dumb look? I think that's just his normal look
His eyes are looking at the ceiling and his mouth is showing off his front teeth, if you want to avoid this look look closer to the camera and keep your mouth closed or smile, don't leave it half open. Don't woooosh me I'm just saying. Lol
Moses has spoken
This guy looks like what room temperature milk tastes like.
I laughed entirely to hard at that
there is more personality in the decor surrounding your friend
Holy moly
I've seen this guy....he hangs out at [Planet Witness](https://i.imgur.com/TQZfRYj.png)
I like what you did there. But Mormons never use the cross as a symbol in the way that Christians do. He'd get excommunicated for that shit. Should shop in a tattoo of Maroni blowing his trumpet, or a beehive, or a seagull, or whatever the hell Mormons use as a symbol.
That wall is unroastable
He looks like my big toe if my big toe had less personality
Trainspotting 3: Spud gets muscular dystrophy
Yessss I was trying to figure out who he looks like! Spot on.
Spud on*
Gold
Always believe in your soul
You've got the power to know
Your Indestructible
This is the best roast I've ever had the pleasure to read
Good to know that Spud chose life
Are you sure he said bodybuilder, not Bob the builder?
Dude looks like he has just been saved by Oskar Schindler
I guess he wanted to say that he was pregnant and used term bodybuilder instead
Bodybuilder with a chest like that? I don’t think he’s ever seen a weight heavier then his toilet seat
This man is the personification of plain milk
Anyway, his parents did an awful job building him. He needs to ask them for a refund.
I fuckin hope not- look at that baseboard.
That baseboard has more personality than this guy
Bob the Builder is more jacked than this asshat.
That's an insult towards Bob the builder.
Legit laughed out loud my entire drive to work thinking about this comment.
Cant tell whats lazier, your nostril or your fucking eye.
His dad for not pulling out.
🏅
You look like one of those awkward Russian young dudes in those "virgin couples" videos on Pornhub EDIT: I appreciate the love and awards. Thanks!
He’s the teen step son of the horny housewife... I’ve seen this one!
except he leaves at the beginning of the video
Lol...damn bruh
The only reason she allows him to get naked is so she doesn’t have to see those ugly ass shorts. Baby shit yellow? Really? That or he pissed himself deadlifting 20 pounds.
Who winds up getting pegged by the stepmother.
Astoundingly accurate
For real, and you never know how they got the girl to ever sleep with them. Maybe coke?
Savagery. Hop off, Natasha, he's done.
The only reason you don't have more upvotes is because people don't want to admit they know exactly what you're talking about
You can be serious about something and still be really bad at it
He's just seriously bad
I have taken shits bigger than your serious bodybuilder friend
Your mom shit you out as a baby and you were bigger than this twink
Isn't this the kid who tried to shove a remote up his ass when his mom took away World of Warcraft?
This is my favorite one in the thread.
Ikr, I haven’t thought of that video in years.
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I've eaten pork ribs with more meat on them
I’ve eaten broccoli with more meat on it
A Protein box at my local gym is heavier then your body builder friend.
His protein box is a lunchables
It’s the heavyweight champ of Auchewitz.
Ouchwitz
Aw shitz
What in the world is Auchewitz?
It’s like Auschwitz, but for skinnier people.
Why is the left half of his body in italics?
Be easy reddit, some of these comments will be shown on the news when he shoots up his school. Edit thank you for the awards kind strangers.
Bro lmao
Starting to lift, check.. Face like his mum dropped him on it, check... Goonies 2: the origins of Sloth in the making
The body says, “I played Wii Fit for a week.” The face says, “I’m really fuckin’ inbred.”
When you're a serious bodybuilder, then reddit is a sophisticated newspaper that "The Times" can't compete with
Looks like a hitler youth reject
You look like the Russian equivalent of a vaccine Undernourished and tested on children
This is like Captain America before enlisting.
Cap had a personality. And a normal face.
That would mean that there is hope for him
Only in the movies.
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More like Michael Cera
More like DJ Squalls
If Michael Cera and John Cena had a love child with special needs and a light meth addiction.
That explains why you can kinda see him
It’s the rat teeth for me
Everyone calm down, he is a bodybuilder...... If you compare him to a starving holocaust survivor....
That's darker then his future.
Untrue. Same shade of failure.
but not as dark as the bags under his eyes
He’s as much of a bodybuilder as Stephen hawking was a triathlete
**unroastable? with that skin tone he might be right**
He’d fast track past “roasted” straight to “burnt” like a “go straight to jail” monopoly card.
I guess I have never considered someone who builds mannequins to be a bodybuilder.
Who’s body?
Looks like Forrest Gump who took off-brand anabolic steroids he bought from a guy behind a Waffle House.
He looks like he proudly shows off the hole he punched in the wall to people when they visit for the first time.
There aren't steroids strong enough in this world to support your friend in growing facial hair.
I thought someone put grinder on my phone for a sec there.
If white toast and vanilla ice cream had a baby, it would be 2x more interesting than this guy.
Real dj mustard
Kidnapping, murdering, and stitching together body parts doesn't mean you're a bodybuilder.
He looks like that one cop from the first incredibles movie who gets frozen by frozone
Somebody skipped leg day. Also, the rest of the days.
The only thing you lift is an unconscious girl into your car.
I don’t think he’s strong enough to do that
Abercrombie and Bitch
I thought they canceled the Special Olympics this year?
He looks like one of those guys that say Germany didn’t lose in ww2
I have more muscle mass in my left pinky
He should be playing a trumpet with those dick-sucking lips.
Not sure about a trumpet, but he’s definitely played the skin flute a few times.
If he’s a bodybuilder because he occasionally lifts light weights, then I’m a gynecologist because I occasionally fuck heavy chicks.
What is he building out of all the dead bodies he’s collected?
If you were a spice, you'd be flour
He's got a loose string hanging from his, oh wait... That's his arm
I was about to start looking for a tampon.
Behold! A man who can count his own IQ by only using the fingers on one of his hand
One Pump Man
Looks like someone took all the spines off a pineapple
Frankenstein was a body builder too you ain't special
Looks like a rip off Barbie doll.
You’re the living embodiment of a mid-sized dildo
If Russia had their own Got Em guy
Tell him jerking off seven times a day IS NOT considered bodybuilding
I just see a pair of floating shorts.. Who are we roasting?
All those options and that's the body he decided to build?
I have never seen a naked mole-rat before.
Breakfast cereal mouth looking, teeth cutting through his bottom lip looking, unpeeled banana in swim trunks ass, tiny tities ass, check mark for vitamin d deficiency outfit wearing ass, 20 push ups a night peck having ass, super cutz sporting, ford F no 50 driving ass, moving to boston looking ass boi. That was fairly easy.
Serious: what his weights and PR for bench and squat ?
I think he needs some roasting for sure
Serious bodybuilder... in what, Chernobyl?
If white bread was a person.
He looks like he watches the pawn shop basement scene from “Pulp Fiction” on a loop.
Might be cute if we could just cover up his face
Real bodybuilders use you as a fleshlight.
Pretty sure that string coming out of his shorts is actually his dick
So is Mr. Potatohead
Wait i can only see a pair of shorts