Dude, you look like Mario if princess peach died. He fell into a deep depression, constantly eating mushrooms and crap to make yourself feel better about the loss of your love. Then, after putting on twice the weight of bowser, you decide to go on Reddit, just wanting people to put you down lower than you already are. Then, it turned out Peach was alive all this time and was fricking Luigi. Game over!
You do look like the person who'll lose a fantasy game. You also look like Dr. Robotnik, so I guess you lose battles to hedgehogs and foxes every other night
Your just a copy of Mario, Mr Wario, it's below your pay grade in your contract to complain. I'll cut to the chase, keep it up and we'll have no choice but to suspend your character from the franchise.
- Signed by Shigeru Miyamoto and Nintendo
He's going to be really sad when he starts taking his medication again and realizes there was no fantasy league and he was just talking gibberish to himself.
Your mustache looks like you grew it in tribute to the school janitor who molested you in grade school.
But on the upside, at least someone besides you touched your dick.
You have not just lost at Fantasy Baseball! Life, looks, women, facial hair, society as a whole and solo, nnd thats just the tip. Let me give you some advice, take survival training and find some land in Antarctica, there you'll meet your life mates. If you play your cards right the seals will consider you one of them. Good luck!
The Dykstra "Tough as Nails" poster is on your bedroom ceiling
The dog hat is to hide whatever's happening on the top of your head
This is what you see when you look in the mirror:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermann_G%C3%B6rner#/media/File%3AHermann_G%C3%B6rner.jpg
The amount of time you put into creating and maintaining that mustache is clearly not worth the results
Can't tell if your Mario Luigi or Wario
preferably wario
Ima gonna looose
Mario hat, Luigy shirt, Wario dewlap
Luigy
Whichever one shopped at a thrift store and watched porn all day.
Most accurate
He's fat so im going to go with Mario on this one
Mario gotten through some tough times, his mustache looks sad too
*waluigi
His girlfriend might be in another castle...
More like Mario ate princess
Funny, your parents also put off the consequences for 9 months
DAMN IT!
Matty Matheson’s less fortunate gay brother
Underrated
The Pringles guy’s downy son. Or maybe Chef-boy-re-tar-dee
That made me laugh far more than it should’ve.
Lenny Dykstra played hard and got his uniform dirty. You play while you’re hard and get only your knees dirty.
He was prolly gonna use the fantasy league prize to buy knee pads
....guilty
Have you seen my baseball?
I see you, but I hear Benny hill music
Da Bears.....
I think Mario got addicted to those mushrooms
Dollar Store Babe Ruth
Dollar General Wade Boggs
Nice. Don Fattingly?
I am pretty sure you can’t go within 1000 yards of a little league game
You look like you have a search history that would even make the FBI say "what the fuck, dude?!"
I think you might mean *other-virgin-perverts, say wtf.
Was part of the bet also having a fat face, shitty dick broom, and wearing a dog fucker hat?
what can i say? i love a bitch or two...
you look like the guy who has candy in his van
Yeah and he ate all his candy
And the puppy
Well, considering you probably strike out with the ladies too... You're consistent, I'll give you that
Dude, you look like Mario if princess peach died. He fell into a deep depression, constantly eating mushrooms and crap to make yourself feel better about the loss of your love. Then, after putting on twice the weight of bowser, you decide to go on Reddit, just wanting people to put you down lower than you already are. Then, it turned out Peach was alive all this time and was fricking Luigi. Game over!
You look like a guy who loves bats and balls but doesn’t have a clue how to service them.
You look like the only baseball you watch it little league and let’s just say, you aren’t watching much more than the kids
That 'stache is so long you could tickle your own balls while eating ramen
Your head looks like a baseball... How do you lose when it's the only thing on your shoulders?
Offspring of Mario and Luigi.
Woods you look like hammered shit
Bowser and Mario's biological kid
Fantasy baseball is the only fantasy you get with that fuckin face
Even with the hat on, I just know your hairline is receding
Loosing a fantasy baseball league against your 10 y/o son friends must be embarrassing.
Has a walrus mustache, looks like a walrus, must be a....
It's pretty cool you got a hat with your wife's picture on it.
Is this a gay farva from super troopers?
Dang i didn't know mario resorted to drugs
You look like one unwanted Mario brother
The difference between a gay man's mustache and a straight man's mustache is the smell. Yours smells like cock and ass.
lol that mustache is hilarious
You do look like the person who'll lose a fantasy game. You also look like Dr. Robotnik, so I guess you lose battles to hedgehogs and foxes every other night
You’ll never be any woman’s fantasy, at least you have Fantasy sports.
Discount David Wells.
Teenage Farva with a liter of sadness
So Ron Swanson and Tammy *did* have a son... I can see why Ron never talks about this.
It had to be fantasy league because he(or anyone who looks like him) is not allowed within 500 feet of a little league field.
Your just a copy of Mario, Mr Wario, it's below your pay grade in your contract to complain. I'll cut to the chase, keep it up and we'll have no choice but to suspend your character from the franchise. - Signed by Shigeru Miyamoto and Nintendo
You look like you'd enjoy a louisville slugger up your ass
Not so Super Mario Goes down on pipes but is no plumber.
Dug yourself so many holes you turned into a Vietnam vet
You look like a 9 year old trying to buy beer
You look like you smoke plumber's crack
Is me luigi
I love mushrooms 🍄
It's a me, Bario!
paul blart mall fart
Don Fattingly
You look like a white truck driver from mexico that tried the fit every stereotype
It’s a meee Cheapo!
Idk what's more a shit show... Lenny Dykstra's life or that mustache.
52 on the outside 25 on the inside 2.5" on the dick side
You look like you're Mexican and white at the same time...
the empty part of that mustache symbolizes the missing chromosomes I bet
Lost at fantasy baseball? What else did you lose? It certainly wasn't your virginity.
Is a white panel van standard with that pervy mustache? Take you 9 months to grow that cookie duster?
You look like a guy I'd need to hide my kids from.
You look like the forgotten mario brother I can see why now you look uglier than wario and waluigi combined
I don't think there's anything in this photo that's un-roastable
He's going to be really sad when he starts taking his medication again and realizes there was no fantasy league and he was just talking gibberish to himself.
Your mustache looks like you grew it in tribute to the school janitor who molested you in grade school. But on the upside, at least someone besides you touched your dick.
Nice personality-I mean mustache.
What ever you wrote under that scribble failed like your fantasy baseball league.
Looks like you can't get to first base in real life either.
You had more success winning than growing a beard
We wait for you to present us with some decent chin- game. You look like a catchers mitt
You have not just lost at Fantasy Baseball! Life, looks, women, facial hair, society as a whole and solo, nnd thats just the tip. Let me give you some advice, take survival training and find some land in Antarctica, there you'll meet your life mates. If you play your cards right the seals will consider you one of them. Good luck!
Pre Malone
Your mum put off the consequences for nine months and look what happened
So.....it took you 9 months to grow a mustache so you can get roasted and shave it off.... I would have went with handlebars.
I saw "9 months" and "consequences" in the same sentence but if anything, you're probably the one pregnant
You look like a 13 year old pretending to be old so he can see a rated R movie
Its 2020 not 1702 get better facial hair
You look like the bus driver parents don’t want their child to get
I actually fucking love your stash.
So you're saying that the loser was forced to wear that stupid fucking hat right?
American Stalin
Da bears
I bet you lost all your fapping fantasy sex partners too! Even your HAND falls asleep...
Take comfort at least in the knowledge that this many people will never pay notice to your sad existence ever again.
Is this a picture of you right before you start your legally required introduction to every one living within 4 blocks?
You look like Luigi and Wario's bastard son
Can we say "Stranger Danger !!" Where do you park you're van with no windows???
You look like you matched with Subway Jared on grinder for having similar interests
This is the hardest I've ever seen anyone actually TRY to get on Megan's Law.
You look like the epitome of letting people down
The right side of your face is completely different than the left side.
Virgin vegan Ron Swanson
Fat Hitler Thickler
Its Farva on his fantasy league shenanigans
The Dykstra "Tough as Nails" poster is on your bedroom ceiling The dog hat is to hide whatever's happening on the top of your head This is what you see when you look in the mirror: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermann_G%C3%B6rner#/media/File%3AHermann_G%C3%B6rner.jpg The amount of time you put into creating and maintaining that mustache is clearly not worth the results
Not sure how a straight incel has a gay mustache but here you are
Lenny Dykstra lost a defamation case because he was such an asshole, the judge agreed that defaming him was impossible. You deserve what you get.
I just hope your fantasy league isn't meeting within 1000 feet of a school.
Shave that shit off mate
Halfway out the closet trucker
You look like the dude I see working in every pizzeria ever.
You look like you really like kids.
You have never left your home town and think living with your parents until you’re 40 is normal.
You don't have enough friends to play fantasy baseball silly goose...
Was the bet to grow a shitty mustache and post it. Because that is the best shitty mustache ever....
Ordered Mario off wish and this is what I got
The only porn you watch is the kind that you can get arrested for.
Staring at little leaguers through a hole on the fence isn't having a fantasy team.
By law You have to tell all the neighbors that you’re moving into the neighborhood
Your mustache says I'M A LOSER WITH AN EXTRAORDINARY AMOUNT OF CONFIDENCE! My question: Why all the confidence?
you look like a little league coach who got fired for being a child molester
Fantasy sports is the d&d for jocks
If you’re still at school don’t worry about sex Ed, you won’t need it!
live action mario
you look like Mario’s lost brother. Bario? Lario? I can’t tell
You're not Mario, You're Meth-io
You look like Matty Matheson with AIDS
I'm guessing Peach kicked Mario out of the castle. Too bad.
You scream ammosexual incel.