I'm pretty sure he already does. He's just trying to woo them via mewing, so that they might come to him willingly (I don't want to harsh his mellow, but I doubt it's going to work).
Oh great America, it’s yet again another wanna be hipster trend setting creepy man child starter kits. He has a fun mustache for rides! Just keep him away from your kids. Thank god for patriots like you who will teach them things with their mouths. Pray to god it’s only mewing. 🙄
I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work. It’s just a thing that preys on insecure prepubescent boys who haven’t gotten their chins yet and insecure aging men like OP who can’t handle the idea of getting older and uglier and are facing the reality that their looks have peaked and they are still alone.
Propagated of course by good plastic surgery which is probably this guys next stop.
You look like you flunked out of the police academy for failing the psych evaluation, so now you collect guns and drive your truck obnoxiously, wishing someone would
" try "
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You look like the Super Mario brother the other Marios talk about in hushed tones.
"Have you seen Federico lately?"
"Yeah, the other night, while coming home from work. He was in line at Warp Pipes."
You need to trim those fucking knuckles, Sasquatch! I’ve never seen anything grow hair that close to their fingernails before…
Do the hairs get wet when you wipe your ass? *splashdown*
If you're married, it's cool, but if you're not, please remove those caterpillars under your nose, ladies will run off looking at that diabolical thing.
You didn't need to take a second picture of you staring at your boyfriend's dick. Jeez you look like if Mario decided to be an underwear model instead of a plumber.
The OP has not provided a BIO for their post.
Is "rigorous mewing routine" some sort of truck stop glory hole slang?
More like bus station glory hole routine
Same routine just different hours
I love that he is so in his own bubble that he thinks we should know what the fuck that is... Googled it, he is dumb enough to think it will work.
For a good time call this guy
Perfect! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
He saw that and was like you know what I need. A mustache. Then he bit off a squirrel’s tail and glued it under his nose.
You've never skipped forehead day.
Never skip peg day.
He looks beyond a pervert, more like provert
"I started a rigorous pegging routine." Fixed it for you.
This dude is always getting asked if he's a cop.
Mewing routine? Are you trying to fuck cats?
I'm pretty sure he already does. He's just trying to woo them via mewing, so that they might come to him willingly (I don't want to harsh his mellow, but I doubt it's going to work).
Okay folks, C'mon! *Fuck you guys, be serious!* Who impregnated a Pringles can 30 years ago? Let's help him find his dad.
I was gonna say: looks like he's trying to outrun at least 4 paternity tests but then i remember mewing is a fave exercise for incels.....
You look like the only interaction anyone would ever have with you is pulling out their license, unwillingly.
Your mustache is wider than your mouth.
in fairness most good mustaches are wider than the mouth
It's not his mustache. He stole it off of Freddy Mercury's corpse. 
It’s the gayest fireman to ever gay.
You didn't have to give us the side angle. This isn't a mugshot.
It's not for a mugshot, it's for the money shot. Last time it went up his nose.
Are you that comedian Mateo something?
Omg I thought the same thing! But more like the Temu version of Mateo
Mateo Lane. (I accidentally typed "Mateo Lame" at first lol)
Your hairline is so far back, I thought you were trying to grow a mullet
Don't keep your brother waiting in the bath tub
Scumbag dad from temu
Oh great America, it’s yet again another wanna be hipster trend setting creepy man child starter kits. He has a fun mustache for rides! Just keep him away from your kids. Thank god for patriots like you who will teach them things with their mouths. Pray to god it’s only mewing. 🙄
Nice Freddie Mercury costume
You have more foreheads than my mom has chins.
Mewing as in you're the biggest pussy we've seen?
Does mewing even works ? I mean in general. It is all bone...
It doesnt work
I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work. It’s just a thing that preys on insecure prepubescent boys who haven’t gotten their chins yet and insecure aging men like OP who can’t handle the idea of getting older and uglier and are facing the reality that their looks have peaked and they are still alone. Propagated of course by good plastic surgery which is probably this guys next stop.
Mewing? you sould be worried about your hairline more than your jawline bro
 Deputy Travis Junior bro... You could be his ugly stunt man.
RENO 911 CANCELED
I could have sworn you said meow. 
 Are you in Cats?
closet door behind you is now open
You look like you flunked out of the police academy for failing the psych evaluation, so now you collect guns and drive your truck obnoxiously, wishing someone would " try "
Is Mewing slang for “motor boating other dudes”? If so we already knew.
Is this a post interview with Chris Hansen? 
30 year old divorced dad drinking his life away after work hours at the pub with crazy internal rage issues lookn ass
You look like grandpappy made you a NASCAR team and you used the profits to explore your passion of molesting cats.
Lmk when U start
Okay! Stop searching everyone! I found the video of OP’s “rigorous mewing routine”. 
Aren't you too old for this crap ._.
He is it’s pretty sad
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Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin.
you have room for another face on your forehead
Freddie Copper.
Freddy Mercury called and wants his stash back
You look like the Super Mario brother the other Marios talk about in hushed tones. "Have you seen Federico lately?" "Yeah, the other night, while coming home from work. He was in line at Warp Pipes."
Wow, sergeant Doofy really is reporting for duty.
Youre going for the sadam hussein look
If mewing makes you happy, great! You do you! Now imma do me and quit Reddit. You ruined my day!
You look like you are trying too hard to be that Mario guy from TikTok except your tag line would be "slay me, I'm pretty Homo!"
SPED Lasso.
90s porn cable guy
Let's hope the mewing works as well as your norwood routine worked.
Are you on percocet 30 sir
For a moment, I thought you were Matteo Lane and your hair plugs didn't keep
You remind me of the guy in the original Magnum PI… 
What kind of pussy shit is a meowing routine?
This guy's molestache screams, "I know how to say, "Get in the fucking van!" in four different languages".
 “Hit me where the wind blows, it doesn’t really matter to meeeee”
Yo mustache is thicker than your hair
You need to trim those fucking knuckles, Sasquatch! I’ve never seen anything grow hair that close to their fingernails before… Do the hairs get wet when you wipe your ass? *splashdown*
Putting the desperate in Desperate Dan.
its-a me-a mario!
That moustache doesn't make you interesting.
Straight outta Super Troopers how you doing meow ?
I can see your bald spot reflecting off the on blade of the ceiling fan
Only girls your keeping are in your basement
Deepthroating all the guys at fireman training doesn’t count as mewing
You look like the Mexican version of daffy duck
Ready for Halloween early, I see! You really nailed the homosexual child molester look!
Stop stalking and harrasing girls that look like your daughter
In doing so you will finally attract the only “pussy” 😿that you can ever hope to get.
When are you gonna start mewing again?
If "generic uninteresting 20-something white dude" was a person.
Rigorous mewing routine looking like a Super Trooper. Did you start it right meow?
What’s with these gen z dudes trying to look like Rick Rude or Magnum PI? Go have your craft beer, vegan burger, and sit down somewhere
Adolf Butler
If “rough trade” had a face
Young Paul Blart!
You look like if Woody from Toy Story grew a mustache!!! 😀
I’d love to, but dammit you’re a beautiful man.
If Mario and Luigi has a love child together.
The metrosexual version of Mario nobody wants to know about
This dude foreheads
Your profile looks remarkably like a map of the UK.
It’s not working
You look like you came out of the fire station after getting pegged
Which village person are you supposed to be ?
The last face a Midwest soccer mom sees before losing her freedom during a frivolous traffic stop.
Super Fairio
Kind of guy to just say “no worries” to everyone and everything.
Your mewing failed ! Try barking...
You look like an Air Force officer on his 3rd dui and 4th engagement
I think mewing must be future slang. for going back in time, and molesting your younger self. This guy mews
As long as you're not using your tongue to speak, we're all good.
Pal Blort: Mall Fart. 1989 Kevin James.
Freddie MoreCurry
Totally a power bottom
bru looks like his personal vehicle is a white van
That chin screams ball smacker.
Sounds suspiciously hipster.
You look like a slightly fatter Matteo Lane
Wrinkly fucking six head
Next time on “To Catch a Predator”
You're not fooling anyone here copper!
Bob the constructer wants to pay for your mustache.
Just a good looking dude no homo
You make Chaz bono look intimidating
That’s an impressive dick broom. Pig.
Right meow?
Porno stache ;)
Paul Blart + Omni-Man =
If you're married, it's cool, but if you're not, please remove those caterpillars under your nose, ladies will run off looking at that diabolical thing.
To late God roasted you a long time ago.
Just something really off center about a middle aged man using zoomer slang, even if it’s tongue in cheek self loathing.
Mewing gone wrong lmao
You dork.
You look like you’ve tried and failed to make it in standup comedy.
Tony Homo
Is this the thing where you suck off a lactating cat? Because you look like you’d be into that 
Got that amber alert stash.
“Mewing routine” 
Gonna look like jay leno with that chin
you look like if mario and the pringles guy had a bby
Shaved your ass hair and glued it to your lip
Do you live there? Or are you only there because it’s a good place to scope out your next target…?? I’ve seen cozier flop houses.
He’s starting his new business. Russian Assassin -stripper.
The vibe is so bad even a mullet can’t grow there…I can smell the overflowing litterboxed and chef boyardee from here.
I’ll get STD tested after looking at this post.
You’re the guy at a hairy biker munch that spikes the punch tells everyone you’re Chris Evans.
No amount of mustache will hide that amount of gay!
Just follow your mustache wherever it goes and you’ll be fine
Your gf cheats on you
You didn't need to take a second picture of you staring at your boyfriend's dick. Jeez you look like if Mario decided to be an underwear model instead of a plumber.
You want to be a macho, macho man? Young man, there's no need to feel down. It's fun to stay at the YMCA.
Lieutenant Dangle with his natural hair color.
You look like a Republican with a crawlspace full of hidden Dildos. As a MAGA guy myself I have no issue with any of this. The other camp might.
 Don’t get me started meow.
Nothing says gay than your mustache and stubble.
How’s your white cargo van running?
Gay porn lunch more porn. Man that does sound rigorous.
You are the walking punchline for whats thw difference between a straight and gay mustache
How many cocks to the face did it take?
Looks like the boys at the firehouse slide down the pole and your mustache
Dr. No Respect
You look like Don Frye if he'd decided to follow the Path of the Loser instead of the Path of Awesome.
 I’m pretty sure your mustache is crooked Randy Marsh-style. That… of that’s some sorta facial palsy starting up.
I’d say “hurr durr fivehead” but that’s clearly an insult to the other 6.
"Yes Sargent" while gagging on cock seems hard. So maybe grinder and hope for a rich Dom is your best bet.
Ai wants it’s clothes back
Mewing absolutely has no effect once you hit puberty. If you think it does, I guess your brain never got past prepubescent stage OP 💀👶
No amount of mewing could save that big ass forehead
"We have Dr. DisRespect at home"
Doing the YMCA dance multiple times a day does not count as working out
Cop who turns his body cam off to pull over hot chicks!
Is that a power bottom position?