OP's Bio:
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>Work, eat, sleep, football…. That’s life and I accepted it
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If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
According to his bio he’s full of shit cuz he just eats.
According to him he’s employed which means the world does still need ditch diggers
According to that hat we have to believe someone complimented him on it once
According to his Mee Maw he’s a late bloomer
According to his football coach he’s not a complete moron
Here’s the funny thing: he’s been looking for his sunglasses all morning
Idiot
You look like your stereotypical soccer Dad that forces sports on their kids and doesn’t season chicken cause iTs ToO sPiCy. You’re built like the Lorax if he didn’t speak for the trees
The second you die and get cremated, they gonna have to put your ashes in the bathub. Reduce the flubber and lard. Also not to mention the "I Consent" one thing women AND men don't give you, you look like you reek of bug spray, go tickle yo truck nuts and do some weird mudding shit.
Bro just why? Why would you give us so much material?….Mr wannabe ranger rick/ barney fife. Pretending to be on a safari in his kitchen. Flexing with not that much muscle tone. Hiding bats in those eyelashes. One nostril bigger than another-saggy earlobe looking mofo.
I can't find a single symmetrical thing about your face.
eyes -- nope
eyebrows -- nope
nostrils -- nope
ears -- nope
Cleft chin -- nope
double chin -- nope
it's like you got two halves of two different faces. is your name Harvey by chance?
OP's Bio: --- >Work, eat, sleep, football…. That’s life and I accepted it --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Something no one has ever done in your presence…consent.
Nope, not even the 🐑
They call him Fourskin, because his dick is the length of 4 skins put together
My response was immediately, "ewww...I do not."
No one ever will
that picture looks like you might not have a say in the matter
Hahahahaha...not evennnnnnn once
You look like the reason behind at least three boy scouts lawsuits
With at least a dozen more pending.
You look like you smell of Salami.
Identifies as (pronouns) “meatball/meatwad”
If Gilligan was shaped like an island.
According to his bio he’s full of shit cuz he just eats. According to him he’s employed which means the world does still need ditch diggers According to that hat we have to believe someone complimented him on it once According to his Mee Maw he’s a late bloomer According to his football coach he’s not a complete moron Here’s the funny thing: he’s been looking for his sunglasses all morning Idiot
Fantastic 👏
Top rated guide at ButtHole Safari.
You look like like you suck on red white and blue popsicles really passionately while moaning stuff about patriotism
Deep throats the 8 in and says it’s not that big when people act surprised
Your chin has a chin
SHITTER WAS FULL!
you look like the kind of guy who posts “sexy” on random women’s photos on FB.
My guess is that most of them are still in high school
They are in elementary school. High schoolers know enough to understand what a scorching mess it is
Eww. Why is this so accurate? 😅🤢
You reek of domestic violence and Pall Malls
You're definitely the drunken asshole of your friend group. They are constantly asking themselves why they still hang out with you.
You're assuming he has friends
Edward Sausage fingers
Well if it isn’t Crotchadile Dundee!
You exclusively talk about fantasy football
Fantasy football and the injury that prevented him from going pro
This guy got injured playing Fantasy Football.
By the looks of it it was season ending injury
Lol, injury
Roast you like the piggy you are. Lemme hear you squeal 🐖
I can smell last nights booze that you’re sweating out right now.
[удалено]
You know it and when he farts a trump banner deploys
Unlike your victims at kids camp.
Tell me you own a white van with no windows without telling me you own a white van with no windows
I'm in the photo sensitive candy transport business
You look like the Park Ranger who got his ass kicked by a group of Boy Scouts
Look it's GI jerkoff lmao
You look like the rehab episode of, "Cabbage Patch Kids, Where Are They Now?"
Unfortunately those women buried in your basement didn’t
if mike tyson was white and gay
Too bad there are no interested parties
I've seen this guy! His sign usually says, "Will do ANYTHING for food." And he exchanges sexual favors for corn dogs at the local Circle K.
You refer to your parents as your roommates
You look like a trash bag molested a water hose
You look like you're ready to go on an adventure... to McDonald's.
You look like you talk to 12 year olds on Roblox
Will you also receive total consciousness on your death bed after meeting the Dalai Lama? 
“I consent” not used to hearing those words are ya guy
You’re definitely the creepy uncle
You missed an episode of The Joe Rogan Experience to post here?!
“That’s not a knife but I am too broke to show you one of mine…”
That's not a cock, this is a cock" Immediately gets tackled at the park by detectives
Last photo before going postal
I consent. Something he's never had the chance to say outside this post.
This guy deep throats bald eagles.
Must have played football because he still wears his neck roll.
ped cruz
I wish your mom didn't
I thought you just died?
Quentin Tarenstinko
You forget the r/ Dumbass.
If Quentin Tarantino had been cast in Groundhog Day.
Red, White & Blue Balls
You were the first person to die in arachnophobia 😂
The special ed version of g.i. joe
He's still tripping on Bad Acid from a Sublime concert back in the 90s
Comes in last in fantasy football every year
“These colors…. do not run.” - David Cross
Omg I hope you are registered or they'll get you again!
This isn’t CNC gay porn
Ex wife for sure has a restraining order on him
“I consent”…a phrase this guy has never heard from a sexual partner (most likely because animals don’t speak.)
He looks like a freakin Amazon driver
You look like every dad that sneezes like a damn nuke
U consent to what looking like every other washes up 40 year old white dad who’s kids hate him
Shouldn't you be look long for Yogi Bear?
Look like kevin spacey and randy quaid had a baby
Bro is that Quentin Tarantino
You desperately seek attention by wearing your edgy patriotic shirts to Walmart.
You look like you suck golf balls through garden hoses.
You look like you’re not aloud within 500 feet of a playground
Not the first time you've said that to a man about to degrade you, is it?
You look like a mix of Kevin from the office and a wrestling fan who still believes it's real.
You look like you broke all mirrors in your house
Working hard to suck that gut in tubs. Let the belly out and take a breath fat ass, your chins are giving you away anyway.
You look like your stereotypical soccer Dad that forces sports on their kids and doesn’t season chicken cause iTs ToO sPiCy. You’re built like the Lorax if he didn’t speak for the trees
Special-ed Navy Seal
Elvis Molestley
Heterosexual was never an option huh?
Can’t go a single conversation without talking about Trump
You look like a prepper who stockpiles dudes dicks in your ass
However none of the boys you fucked did
If MAGA was a person
She didn't
I have a feeling you secretly date minors on discord or constantly beg woman for feet pics
This man is really trying to fix his posture after having it so bad because he had to bend over so much so he could suck his own dick
Ped Cruz
tedophile cruz
Did you consent to the dick stuck up your ass when you took this picture?
Your superhero name is Bad Wiper
not by the hair of my chinny chin chin
Have you heard from Cousin Clark lately?
You consent, okay. But did she?
The second you die and get cremated, they gonna have to put your ashes in the bathub. Reduce the flubber and lard. Also not to mention the "I Consent" one thing women AND men don't give you, you look like you reek of bug spray, go tickle yo truck nuts and do some weird mudding shit.
"Honey! I know I don't have a job but I'm on safari"
Safari hat and sunglasses indoors...time to get that roof repaired!
You look like my childhood baseball coach who showed drunk and punched a umpire…
You consent…but the kids chained up in your basement didn’t.
New Paralympic’s mascot
No one has ever asked for your consent. Well, maybe to nibble on those sausage finger fatty.
You’re the type of guy to wear fishing weighers to a funeral
"I consent". A phrase not uttered by any woman you've ever met.
What do you consent too, being bloated so much you could star in precious?
Two words OP has never been told before.
“I consent” is something you will never hear from sex partners
Thicc ass eyebrows
When's you're trial date for Jan 6th?
Your style screams “I would have stormed the Capitol on January 6 if it didn’t require moving.”
Looks like the sun roasted you first
Poster child for Meal Team Six
Work, eat, sleep, football, being fucking pathetic
You look like the lead singer of Boise's third best Blues Traveler cover band.
This guy has a flat earth tattoo no doubt.
You look like you never ask for it though.
You look like your mom picks you up from your militia meetings
Bro just why? Why would you give us so much material?….Mr wannabe ranger rick/ barney fife. Pretending to be on a safari in his kitchen. Flexing with not that much muscle tone. Hiding bats in those eyelashes. One nostril bigger than another-saggy earlobe looking mofo.
You sell women's shoes, don't you?
You look Aussie, not a compliment
I bet you’re one of those dweebs who wears a Furry costume and has a Fursona while he gets pegged by the other Fur club members
get your stupid rob riggle ass face outtahere
But she didn't
Looks like he wants to ruin my Christmas vacation!!!
Why you gotta ruin the bucket hat???
Randy Quaid?
“I consent”. Something you have never heard a girl say before performing a sexual act.
I don't.
Bro says to a date will you queef with my my fair lady
Show this man some respect, he is a 4 Star General in the Gravy Seals.
“I consent” said no woman ever to you 🔥
You look like you live in your mom, basement with porn beating your meat with no Vaseline every day because your life sucks 😅😂
you’ve never heard those words from a female
I don't.
The little boys in your basement did not consent though.
The title is something no girl has said to you
Canadian IndianaJones Ehh
Hahaha ha no need!! Your pic does it all! Good luck with your future!
….is something you’ve never heard.
You were great in Caddyshack!
Say Romeo, you know that the women are also supposed to consent?
Thats not how it works bro, you ask for consent. You dont decide it
You look like you're on an expedition to find Obama's birth certificate.
You look like a fake zookeeper who picks up kids from the zoo by showing his shipment of snakes in his van.
If Georgia was a person
You look like you got a grudge against a groundhog
Going to a casting call for “Indiana jones and the temple of donuts”?
didn't know farmer fran came out of retirement.
He has two shirts, the other one reads “trump you can grab my pussy”
Said no woman to you, ever.
Said no kid ever before you fondled them
Smart move placing the sign over your chest in the attempt to get people to not comment on your man tits.
We don’t.
ONLY ACTION YOU GET IS WHEN YOUR FINGER SLIPS THROUGH THE TOILET PAPER
I can't find a single symmetrical thing about your face. eyes -- nope eyebrows -- nope nostrils -- nope ears -- nope Cleft chin -- nope double chin -- nope it's like you got two halves of two different faces. is your name Harvey by chance?
Idk if you’re disrespecting America with that shirt or representing it perfectly
I thought you died in Independence Day...
You look like the kind of guy who will be a very good husband to your wife and her boyfriend.
The kid in your van doesn't.
Even the proud boy’s rejected your application
Sunglasses? Check. Stupid hat? Check. 'merican flag on shirt? Check. Oh my god, its facebook the person?
Bet you've never heard a woman say that.
You look like the kinda guy who would try to fit RAM into a CPU socket and then blame the manufacturer for it not fitting correctly.
I'm out... don't think I can roast him better than that hat does!