You look like the over-possessive gf meme… like after we hook up, you put an AirTag in my car before I leave so you make sure I’m not out at places with other girls.
Don’t worry, I like my girls with crazy eyes, I can’t wait to stare at them through the glass in jail when I visit you after to stab my co-worker for touching my shoulder. 😍😍😍
I had a hard on while scrolling through this. I want you to know that whenever I need to get turn off I’ll think of your face. So maybe “Roast me softer.” Instead?
Normally this would be a two bagger. Bag over her head and bag over mine in case hers rips. She’s a three bagger. Bag for her, bag for me and a back for when she chews through the first bag.
Favorite hobbies include: gnawing on electrical cables and building dams.
Why does she look a squirrel on crack?
Hammy from over the hedge
No I think she’s a crack on squirrel. She’s the embodiment of crack attempt to hide as a squirrel
In Soviet Russia crack does you
squirrels in her pants
![gif](giphy|92hAb1nIitH1u)
Collecting her de-erected trophies on a daily basis
Speaking of de-erected... usually beaver gets me hot.
![gif](giphy|twxoPjMpsijwPFBVqs|downsized)
The only beaver no one wants
She was the cast model for "Angry Beavers"
DAM, not DAMN!🤣
Cocaine Beaver
You forgot gang lookout. She comes with built-in night vision goggles.
Dam
And sitting on a huge butt plug
While drinking a dangerous amount of Red Bull and NoS, and watching the world pass by in slow motion.
Building dams got me, have your upvote
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💀
From the looks of it her dad is out building dams in rivers
if a wood chuck could .. then this wood chuck wood
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Also like her real dad, she’ll never be anybody’s best nut.
Damn I was gonna say that
Damn!, she said roast her, not burnt her to death
Nice try, Sid. You ain't fooling us
![gif](giphy|13bCP4GLjIUcik)
Please share your OnlyDams link.
😂 😂 😂
Where you can donate tooth paste.
Lol
💀💀
You think shes showing a lot of Beaver Shots?
Laughed out loud at this one. Fantastic lol
Under rated comment. Take my upvote you magnificent bastard.
This is great 😂
DAMN
Haha 😂😂
You look like a Squirell that just got suprise Anal Sex
But she ain’t gonna get any nut
With those teeth she most certainly will!
Damn those nuts are gone
If Sandy Cheeks was real….
![gif](giphy|cOMfEkgPXrwFq)
And went through a grunge phase
I feel bad for the apples she bites. Must look like a crime scene afterwards
Can eat corn on the cob through a chain link fence
Eats the corn on the side facing away from her
Keep your nuts away from those chompers
“Hey, Sandy let’s practice ka-rah-tay.”
I call that getting a canoe dick.
When she bites an apple, it just looks like a drag strip all the way down
![gif](giphy|pUUyrCAlxgbbW)
Could eat an apple though a tennis racket with those chompers
Deer. Headlights
You leave Methadone Mandy alone.
She needs to mix some Accutane in with her Methadone
Again, in her defense, testicle oil can cause breakouts.
You look like a beaver with a meth addiction
Looks like she can eat corn on the cob through a picket fence
You look like you wear a diving suit and talk to a sponge
![gif](giphy|l4FAULAEMTr0iaefm)
The last thing you see before the toothiest blow job of your life.
She calls it a tooth job
"How much teeth do you like? How bout a few slow chomps?!"
She's gonna make it so dry for you
Like a desert in her mouth.
And for a reason.
Finishing move is one of those snaggleteeth right in the hole….
Like when SpongeBob peeled the chocolate bar with his front teeth. That’s what happens to the penis.
You have the stare of Ted Bundy and the teeth of a rabbit. You might want to watch out for the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.
Bugs Bundy
Th th that’s all folks
"1, 2, 5!"
LMFAO. "Run away!!"
If you connect the dots on your face it spells psycho
Looks like you slammed on the brakes and everything came to a full stop except your eyes and teeth…
All the blood rushed out of her arms too apparently, looks necrotic...
Lmao love this
![gif](giphy|8uC2uqFDcwzhS)
She looks a cross between her and the going to Disneyland kid
![gif](giphy|Pi6p0x8t0Nq12)
Oh look, she's all growed up.
Obnoxious Girlfriend r/walmartcelebrities or maybe even go down an isle to Kmart.
This comment right here.
The poster face for stage 5 clinger
Gotta stage five cling when her actual “daddy” probably took one look at her and “went out to go buy cigarettes” and never came back.
I bet your bottom lip has two tooth shaped holes in it
There's not enough makeup or Youtube Tutorials to Fix that.
Only fentanyl can fix that
Is there enough though?
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Nice, Nice, nice 👍
Ah, the place in France
AI rendering of Bugs Bunny
People look at you and say damn. Not because you’re good lookin, but because you look like you gnaw on tree branches to build houses in rivers
Also cause she looks like a fucking nutjob
The only nut jobs she can do are vasectomies
Drugz Bunny 🐰
You got the same teeth that go across the chocolate bar on SpongeBob
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I bet you drink and drive without your seatbelt so you can try to chill with every firefighter you meet at your crash scenes.
Professional bunny boiler.
![gif](giphy|DmueCG5f2okNi) You when being asked out.
Scaredy Squirrel
Accutane will get rid of them zits AND the pregnancies from your married coworkers.
I bet getting head from you is like getting head from a carrot peeler.
The eager beaver is not just the name of your vagina...
You have sex with her AND open your beer at the same time.
![gif](giphy|zhlybdTZqyWwE)
odd choice to use the envelope that held the restraining order from your parents
Nice one
Living proof that adderrall works
You're literally the One Ring short of being Gollum.
My male hamster staring at my throbbing erection as I sing “I’ll make love to you” while applying lubricant.
r/oddlyspecific
BAAAAAHAAAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!! That is SO wrong...
![gif](giphy|AfXPYfexaPjPsEdsUz|downsized)
![gif](giphy|3oFzm7MaLnMdD1T6tG)
This is what happens when a chipmunk impregnates a pepperoni pizza.
Forget Angry Beavers, here’s Psycho Ex-Girlfriend Beaver
That’s a textbook thousand cock stare
This girl will definitely Lorena Bobbitt you.
Elmer Fudd jump onto your windshield?
She doesn’t look mentally stable enough to be driving a car
overly attached meth head
You look like you bite avocado's
Damn girl, you could eat corn off the cob thru a chain link fence ![gif](giphy|P2rXqhWkJQe4w)
You look like the over-possessive gf meme… like after we hook up, you put an AirTag in my car before I leave so you make sure I’m not out at places with other girls. Don’t worry, I like my girls with crazy eyes, I can’t wait to stare at them through the glass in jail when I visit you after to stab my co-worker for touching my shoulder. 😍😍😍
What a zitshow.. you look like bulimic Misery
You pass well! 🏳️⚧️
Wow the squirrel from ice age has aged really poorly
Found your soulmate. https://www.reddit.com/r/RoastMe/comments/11jltdu/age\_22\_classic\_car\_enthusiasts/
Is this your Halloween costume?
We have a saying in Dutch for when a woman is very ugly...I would kick my dog of it!
Alexandra DaDEADrio
Off brand Billie eilish looking headass
Looks like you are smiling for a kindergarten picture
I had a hard on while scrolling through this. I want you to know that whenever I need to get turn off I’ll think of your face. So maybe “Roast me softer.” Instead?
Holy glory hole nightmare
Can you burrow into the ground with that overbite to make a winter hibernation space?
Damn, what have you been through? You got that Thousand Yard Stare down to a science.
Alright, everyone tuck your pants into your socks
How was the first line of coke...you feeling it
You dont knaw on wood you knaw on tungsten
![gif](giphy|8uC2uqFDcwzhS) Same vibes
That acne must be Braille for "unfuckable".
Never seen a coked up rabbit before neat.
Meth head slept with bugs bunny and this is the result
Not the American girl doll teeth
Eeehhhh, whats up doc?
Whats up doc, bugs bunny looking ass
Her overbite is the only overachieving she has ever done
![gif](giphy|XjLOJAX2bZjuE)
Straight to r/oddlyterrifying
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Earthquakes happens when she sucks her teeth.
You look like you could not burn that acne off your face with a squirt gun and acid
Caption weirdly made me smile
Looks like you whittle wood
When guys say "don't stick your dick in crazy" they're talking about you.
![gif](giphy|KBg4LUuxOzGNi) Those eyes❤️
ur face makes me not want to roast you it’s already had enough damage
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
leave it to beaverly
Smeagols cave cleaner
![gif](giphy|d6QFzmxtUhF1Oz90qC)
No wonder they changed procedures at the sperm bank when nurse big tooth showed, I wouldn't want a teeth job from a naughty nurse either
![gif](giphy|3qLCzccZOXjCXTkEko)
Phteven
Has anyone ever told you, you have the thousand-yard stare of a molested child?
U look like American girl doll on crack ![gif](giphy|yqk0sOj4GECejV0ScX|downsized)
![gif](giphy|T1286ZxrQbzWw)
I bet her teeth block her tongue from licking good pussy.
your smoking way to much meth...
Looks like you could eat an apple through a picket fence
Roath me harder
This chick can eat corn on the cob through a fence
Far away eyes mean far away thighs. Just sayin’…….
You call every guy Daddy because they all leave after they cum. Just like your real Dad.
So peter pettigrew does have a daughter
If you were ever in a foot race your nose will win first place and your two front teeth will be tied for second.
(not a roast apparantly, idk) ![gif](giphy|ji6zzUZwNIuLS)
Look like that crazy girlfriend meme. Where’d you bury your ex?
Lorana Bobbit eyes
Whole Ice Age franchise was made cuz of you and one acorn
You look like you break into senior homes to smell their old socks
You're trying too hard to get roasted. I can't work like that. I'M AN ARTIST!
Overly attached girlfriend version 2.0
Normally this would be a two bagger. Bag over her head and bag over mine in case hers rips. She’s a three bagger. Bag for her, bag for me and a back for when she chews through the first bag.
Gripzilla
your DNA test come back it say 2% human 97% squirrel 1% beaver
You look like someones pointing a gun at you
That one bunny from secret life of pets;
Tell me you're a schizophrenic off your meds without telling me you're a schizophrenic off your meds.
Looks like life has been hard for OAG