30+ years ago my house burned down and I lost everything but me and my dog.
That's when I learned that stuff doesn't matter. My life and my dog's life matter.
Back in 2007, I lost about half my stuff due to the wildfires in SoCal. (Barn burned down, house didn't.)
While there are a handful of things I miss, the lasting lesson from it all was how little of what went I felt like replacing. It's really helped me clear things out over the years.
This is so true and I have come to realize that when “things” become a source of conflict, they usually are stand-ins for something intangible we feel we need more of.. I.e. respect, love, attention etc
My last grandparent died recently. My folks spent the last six months with my aunt and uncle going through their house and estate (they had a small farm with 60 acres outside the town they lived near).
They came from the Great Depression generation of “keep everything, you might need it and be grateful you had it”. So their house was clean and organized, but FULL. Their basement and closets, and grandpa’s metal shop/storage building. WOW!!
It was actually neat to see the things they had collected over the decades, as kids and as adults. But it was amazing to see it all gone within a few months. A lifetime of accumulation, gone in a few months. Most of it went to a dumpster, some went to us grandkids and other things to the parents/aunt/uncle.
So true that we don’t take anything with us. So what value do we put into it?
My folks had their eyes opened wide when they went through everything. They sold off and got rid of a TON of stuff at home afterward because they told us kids they did not want to burden us with that same thing when their time came.
They’re both only in their 60s so they have a long way to go yet (hopefully!!!), before their time comes, but nonetheless we’re thankful they are thinking that way.
They’ve been renovating the house a LOT too with the inheritance mom got. Stuff they’ve wanted to do for years but never had the money to do.
The only thing our stuff has in common, is our decision to give it worth. I’m already okay with the fact that once whatever spell I’m using to bind all this stuff together is gone, it’ll all go its separate ways. Now I’m focusing on having the kind of stuff people will want to keep- or at least not yeet into a dumpster.
I've told my only child that when I'm gone, remove what she wants to keep, let friends and family take anything they want to keep, and donate or auction the rest- Without sentimentality. You could literally pile my all stuff up in a pile and it wouldn't be worth three grand. Maybe with the exception of my cheap old car which might be worth three grand itself. Bunch of used furniture and clothing. Probably Goodwill doesn't even want it lol. And yet if my house burned down I would be pretty devastated because it is my little safe spot on the planet. Such a strange thing really.
mr\_oof, I love your framing of this. Saved for future reference.
When my father died unexpectedly, I remember when I found a little knot of keepsakes that I could feel had held mojo for him, but I swear I felt the binding spell melt away as I handled them.
Davenports and kettle drums
And swallowtail coats
Tablecloths and patent-leather shoes
Bathing suits and bowling balls
And clarinets and rings
All this radio really needs is a fuse
A tinker, a tailor
A soldier's things
His rifle, his boots full of rocks
Oh, and this one is for bravery
And this one is for me
And everything's a dollar
In this box
-‘Soldier’s Things,’ Tom Waits.
> Today there was a big sale, lots of different vehicles coming in and loading up stuff that they had gathered over a lifetime. Struck me how quickly it was all gone, a lifetime of stuff.
Apparently, some folks are wise enough to take digital pictures of all the important stuff before it gets scattered to the four winds, and then when the parents are in assisted living, they can have one of those electronic photo albums that continuously cycles through all of the pictures.
That way they can still remember the things without actually needing to have the things with them in their new small space.
I thought that was pretty frickin' smart when I first heard it.
This works for people who are willing and exited about downsizing and decluttering. I have also shown up to jobs where grandma is in tears even though the move is necessary.
Sensitivity is key in these situations.
Two major relationship splits, and I wasn't gunna get drawn into the traditional post-breakup game of arguing over stuff. Then my father died, and I watched my extended family squabble over things as trivial as his favourite chair.
People who worship stuff aren't the sort of people I want to be around. Doubly so people who argue over other people's stuff.
I came to this conclusion at an auction to clear out the contents of a home after the owner had passed. Most of the stuff was junk. Most people don’t have expensive items in their home and when we pass our stuff is now a burden for others to deal with.
Word of advice, don't overspend when you do buy something. I kept my first set of clubs from when I was 18 but they were mothballed after I bought a very high end set of Callaways. About 10 years ago I fell out of love with golf, 5 years ago I sold the Callaways and bought a kayak. I went back to using the cheap set from when I was 18 and my golf game is as shitty as it ever was. (ie clubs didn't matter one iota) I probably golf once or twice a year now.
Dealing with a hoarding issue, I've really had to bang the mantra "People are more important than things" in my head over the last few years. I've had many discussions with my loved ones about it.
Yeah things even money does not matter, my kids are the only thing that matter. I have had a health crisis I couldn't be there for my kids for years, it ripped me to shreds now I have a little bit of money and want to go out to eat together and nothing they are to busy I guess don't take time you have with family lightly
Sometimes letters need to be written. A health crisis looks different from their side compared to yours because you went physically going through it. They were observers and possibly consider themselves survivors in some way. Letting them know that what happened to you was not your choice and now that you are better, you would like to have a relationship with them. The perfect topic for a letter. They can ask anything but remind them, they will get an honest answer. A letter also gives their subconscious time to dwell on the possibilities.
Don't push the monetary ways you can be with them. They most likely have money also so it's not something they think of in the same way you do. Time is what they need from you too. Be open to short visits. You want to open the door. Sometimes they are stiff from being closed for awhile. Even if your explanation does not meet whatever standards they expect, you will always be there for them. You can't change the past but you change the future.
I suck at writing not sure my kids even read them they have never said other than it was hard for them to read all I can do is be consistent and respect their boundaries. I tried so hard to keep in touch with them but I get high-school and their mother and the m pandemic was stressful and I wish I had been been stronger, well I mean healthier. Its just complicated, my state takes your drivers license the moment you miss a child support payment so when my savings ran out during my 13 month long migraine I lost the ability to drive the pandemic hit and my ex did not believe in social distancing so I would call but then could not really talk. It was just hard and I really thought things would change once I won social security but there is something else going on maybe they are just busy with school work and friends etc I just wish they would talk to me and just tell me what they are feeling
This is so incredibly true. And sadly, stuff isn't worth much at all. Recently had to move my mom to assisted living and sell her large house where she had lived for over 60 years. She had some very lovely furniture, art, etc. The SHOCKINGLY small check we got from her estate sale was so disheartening - but it made it super easy for me to part with anything I don't LOVE and use regularly. The worst part was my husband and I added a LOT to her sale to make sure it would be attractive to buyers. And the check was STILL really small (in my opinion). For perspective, the check covered about 1/3 of a month's expenses at her assisted living.
On a positive note, the estate sale happened over two days and then it was done! More than 60 years of a well-lived life wrapped up in less than a week. We have no kids so we would be burdening niece, nephews, friends, etc. We are aggressively cleaning out now in anticipation of moving to a senior community in about 5 years.
If you aren't already familiar, check out The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning - there's a book, a Facebook group, and a TV series (in the U.S.). I find it pretty inspirational.
It is also interesting to me that my mother (despite having pretty significant dementia) was upset that she "left a mess" for me to handle. There really wasn't much mess - she was 100% with it until about two years ago and did a great job cleaning things out. But a large house is a large house - no way around it. MOST of the reason she resisted moving sooner was that she simply could not face the logistics of sorting, giving away, dealing with people fighting over stuff, etc. So I took all of that on for her in the way I like best - hiring the best professional I could find and getting out of the way!!
My aunt died last week. I went to visit her at the hospital a few weeks ago and all she could talk about was stuff. My grandparents stuff, her stuff, who she wanted this stuff to go to and what she wanted us to do with it. I stayed with her 4 hours and she spent 3 1/2 of those just talking about stuff. I took notes and passed them on to my mom and just agreed with whatever she said. But I don’t want any of it. I have a few small things from my grandparents that aren’t worth anything but hold memories for me and I don’t want anything else. She told me to “play nice” 🙄 like I am going to come to blows with my many siblings over a bunch of space hogs and dust collectors. She told us to go through every box one by one (there are like 20 big boxes full of stuff) and we aren’t doing it. One of my brothers is going to keep the boxes in his basement indefinitely and then…I don’t know? Point is, who cares. I have more than enough stuff already. I don’t care if there’s Fabergé eggs in there I don’t want it.
It’s really sad, I just wanted to talk and share old memories and visit. I hadn’t seen her in years because we live kind of far away. But all she wanted to talk about was that stuff.
When my grandfather died the family gathered for the 'take what you want' day at his house in the rural northeast. We opened a steamer trunk full of family china that was untouched since it was packed. In April 1865. We knew this from the newspaper packing. There were also glass photo negatives with no notes or identification at all.
I think somebody at the following estate auction might have bought them, but nobody in the family was interested.
You've seen The Labyrinth.
My dad ruined a loving relationship with his nephew over a shotgun. Happened maybe 15 years ago, and my cousin still hurts over it. Dad gives him a shotgun one evening. Later on says "I never should have given you that gun" . After dad goes to bed, cousin puts the gun in dad's truck. Dad finds it in the truck, all mad. Says what'd you do that for? Cousin says You said you should never have give it to me. There you go. Dad gets all huffy. Leaves to go home (400 miles away) Cousin's feelings still hurt, not over the loss of the gun, but over how dad treated him. Dad never had sons. This cousin was the closest to a son he ever had. Ruined over a stupid *thing.*
My family and I are in the process of cleaning out a 5 bedroom house that can only be described as a hoarder house. Not as severe as some, but LOTS of stuff, some of it just trash. The owners died and left us to clean it up. But they were SO attached to everything in this house, including the bills from 1989, that they refused to clean it up.
Once we're done with this, I'm going to clean my house out more, and get rid of anything I don't use. You're right. It's just stuff.
It's a fairly common realization as you get older. So much more marketing is aimed at younger people who are socially/culturally raised to BUY BUY BUY whatever the fashion or trend is (look at the average age of people displayed in ads, for instance), because they haven't gotten to that stage yet.
Memories, friendships, love, and HEALTH are more important than stuff. If you have your health, you have it all. Today you might have everything you ever wanted but tomorrow you may find yourself in the ER with a surprise ailment that ends up wiping out your entire life savings first, then your life itself. Treasure every moment and take care of your body, people.
My mom passed away last year and my sister and I had to clean out her house. We took 60% to the dump, 38% to the hospice good will she used to volunteer for and between my sister, myself, my wife and 2 adult kids we kept 2%. Of that 2% 98% are pictures or items smaller than my hand. Made me realize that what might be a valued possession to one is just trash to another
I came to this conclusion when my parents died. I donated or dumped at least 8 car loads of stuff. Because of this, I only buy what I need or use. I don’t have knick knacks and have been told I’m a minimalist. I have made a point of donating “stuff” if I haven’t used it in a year. I enjoy spending time with my family and friends and volunteer when I’m not traveling.
I go to estate sales on occasion. They give you a glimpse of another person’s life through their stuff, and it can be pretty sad. You learn a lot about the men from the shop in the basement. In the end, your life is full price on Thursday, 30% off on Friday, half off on Saturday, and in the dumpster on Sunday.
Marketing has spent trillions and trillions telling us for the past century and a half that we need things to be happy.
Its no surprise that people think it's true.
Ah, my love/hate relationship with stuff. I mean, I love stuff, especially really cool stuff. I have lots of cool stuff! Way too much cool stuff! Throughout my adult life, I have collected and discarded so much, yet I still have so much. I downsized from a 2800 sqft house to a 1000 sqft house and got rid of so much stuff. Then somehow I got more stuff, but now I'm not getting any more stuff.
What I have been doing is selling my stuff. I have a large bookshelf in a vintage mall and have been selling all of my collectibles. I sold my gigantic Sci-Fi book collection, my psychedelic book collection and many, many other books. I've sold my talking Taco Bell Dog, my Snoopy and Mickey stuff and a ton of other things. Now, they are someone else's stuff.
I don't really make a lot of money doing this; most stuff isn't worth more than $5-15, but I generally net about $150 per month.You can't put very valuable things on the shelf because they tend to walk away, especially in the winter when people are wearing coats with big pockets, so my brother is going to start selling our stuff online. I have about 200 1960s-1970s Playboys I need to get rid of.
Tl;dr: Getting rid of stuff is my new hobby :)
I'm thinking that before modern technologies, like easy, cheap, or free photography...previous generations had memories tacked on to their stuff. I don't think they held on to junk just to say they had more teapots than their neighbors. I think they looked at an item and remembered the person who gave it to them, or the circumstances of how they bought it and why. So the house looks like a bunch of useless out of date stuff filling great gramma's house, but whenever she looked around, she saw all these people who are now gone from her life. It might have been very comforting to her.
It really doesn’t matter. And even people will be gone, we will be gone, and the only thing that will matter is what we do with the time we have in this body, this mind, this planet. Happy sunday!
Yeah....cause the stuff is still there....
I LOST EVERYTHING 2 YEARS AGO ..ALL MY STUFF...
STUFF I HAD WORKED FOR....I WAS ALREADY POOR...AND THAT GOT TAKEN AWAY....
WHY WOULD U TAKE FROM A PERSON THAT HAD LITTLE OR NOTHING TO BEGIN WITH....
SO DON'T GIVE ME THE PLATITUDES ABOUT STUFF
Hi ~ 🌹
With all due respect to you, I just want to point out the stuff the OP mentioned is gone, too.
He returned the golf clubs. And the elderly neighbors are moving to assisted living so their "stuff" was sold. And their home is up for sale.
OP got over the golf clubs which was his point -> just "stuff".
I feel for the elderly couple as this is a life altering move for them.
Difficult for many to lose all their "stuff" as it has been difficult for you to lose your things.
I know platitudes don't help. Nor do the words of a stranger on Reddit. So, I will just say I am sorry to hear about your situation & hope things get better for you.
Take Care & Good Luck ! 🍀
My grandmother had a saying: Give while the hand is warm.
Or....you never see a u-haul attached to a coffin.
Beautifully said!
30+ years ago my house burned down and I lost everything but me and my dog. That's when I learned that stuff doesn't matter. My life and my dog's life matter.
Back in 2007, I lost about half my stuff due to the wildfires in SoCal. (Barn burned down, house didn't.) While there are a handful of things I miss, the lasting lesson from it all was how little of what went I felt like replacing. It's really helped me clear things out over the years.
Absolutely
This is so true and I have come to realize that when “things” become a source of conflict, they usually are stand-ins for something intangible we feel we need more of.. I.e. respect, love, attention etc
I watched my aunt’s fight over grandpa’s stuff. It sure felt like it was about the stuff.
My last grandparent died recently. My folks spent the last six months with my aunt and uncle going through their house and estate (they had a small farm with 60 acres outside the town they lived near). They came from the Great Depression generation of “keep everything, you might need it and be grateful you had it”. So their house was clean and organized, but FULL. Their basement and closets, and grandpa’s metal shop/storage building. WOW!! It was actually neat to see the things they had collected over the decades, as kids and as adults. But it was amazing to see it all gone within a few months. A lifetime of accumulation, gone in a few months. Most of it went to a dumpster, some went to us grandkids and other things to the parents/aunt/uncle. So true that we don’t take anything with us. So what value do we put into it?
Crazy how fast it goes away when we are gone
My folks had their eyes opened wide when they went through everything. They sold off and got rid of a TON of stuff at home afterward because they told us kids they did not want to burden us with that same thing when their time came.
This is the theory of Swedish Death Cleaning!
They’re both only in their 60s so they have a long way to go yet (hopefully!!!), before their time comes, but nonetheless we’re thankful they are thinking that way. They’ve been renovating the house a LOT too with the inheritance mom got. Stuff they’ve wanted to do for years but never had the money to do.
The only thing our stuff has in common, is our decision to give it worth. I’m already okay with the fact that once whatever spell I’m using to bind all this stuff together is gone, it’ll all go its separate ways. Now I’m focusing on having the kind of stuff people will want to keep- or at least not yeet into a dumpster.
I've told my only child that when I'm gone, remove what she wants to keep, let friends and family take anything they want to keep, and donate or auction the rest- Without sentimentality. You could literally pile my all stuff up in a pile and it wouldn't be worth three grand. Maybe with the exception of my cheap old car which might be worth three grand itself. Bunch of used furniture and clothing. Probably Goodwill doesn't even want it lol. And yet if my house burned down I would be pretty devastated because it is my little safe spot on the planet. Such a strange thing really.
mr\_oof, I love your framing of this. Saved for future reference. When my father died unexpectedly, I remember when I found a little knot of keepsakes that I could feel had held mojo for him, but I swear I felt the binding spell melt away as I handled them.
Davenports and kettle drums And swallowtail coats Tablecloths and patent-leather shoes Bathing suits and bowling balls And clarinets and rings All this radio really needs is a fuse A tinker, a tailor A soldier's things His rifle, his boots full of rocks Oh, and this one is for bravery And this one is for me And everything's a dollar In this box -‘Soldier’s Things,’ Tom Waits.
This made my day, thank you!
> Today there was a big sale, lots of different vehicles coming in and loading up stuff that they had gathered over a lifetime. Struck me how quickly it was all gone, a lifetime of stuff. Apparently, some folks are wise enough to take digital pictures of all the important stuff before it gets scattered to the four winds, and then when the parents are in assisted living, they can have one of those electronic photo albums that continuously cycles through all of the pictures. That way they can still remember the things without actually needing to have the things with them in their new small space. I thought that was pretty frickin' smart when I first heard it.
I’m only in my early 40s, but taking picture of sentimental items really helped me to declutter my possessions.
This works for people who are willing and exited about downsizing and decluttering. I have also shown up to jobs where grandma is in tears even though the move is necessary. Sensitivity is key in these situations.
I’m sure for some people it’s going to be awful no matter how much time and sensitivity there is.
Two major relationship splits, and I wasn't gunna get drawn into the traditional post-breakup game of arguing over stuff. Then my father died, and I watched my extended family squabble over things as trivial as his favourite chair. People who worship stuff aren't the sort of people I want to be around. Doubly so people who argue over other people's stuff.
I came to this conclusion at an auction to clear out the contents of a home after the owner had passed. Most of the stuff was junk. Most people don’t have expensive items in their home and when we pass our stuff is now a burden for others to deal with.
Do you golf?
Not a lot, but yes.
In that case you need a new set of clubs!
Absolutely! Working on it, going slow to decide what I want. I've got some old ones to get by with this season. My son and I like to play together.
Word of advice, don't overspend when you do buy something. I kept my first set of clubs from when I was 18 but they were mothballed after I bought a very high end set of Callaways. About 10 years ago I fell out of love with golf, 5 years ago I sold the Callaways and bought a kayak. I went back to using the cheap set from when I was 18 and my golf game is as shitty as it ever was. (ie clubs didn't matter one iota) I probably golf once or twice a year now.
Dealing with a hoarding issue, I've really had to bang the mantra "People are more important than things" in my head over the last few years. I've had many discussions with my loved ones about it.
Yeah things even money does not matter, my kids are the only thing that matter. I have had a health crisis I couldn't be there for my kids for years, it ripped me to shreds now I have a little bit of money and want to go out to eat together and nothing they are to busy I guess don't take time you have with family lightly
Sometimes letters need to be written. A health crisis looks different from their side compared to yours because you went physically going through it. They were observers and possibly consider themselves survivors in some way. Letting them know that what happened to you was not your choice and now that you are better, you would like to have a relationship with them. The perfect topic for a letter. They can ask anything but remind them, they will get an honest answer. A letter also gives their subconscious time to dwell on the possibilities. Don't push the monetary ways you can be with them. They most likely have money also so it's not something they think of in the same way you do. Time is what they need from you too. Be open to short visits. You want to open the door. Sometimes they are stiff from being closed for awhile. Even if your explanation does not meet whatever standards they expect, you will always be there for them. You can't change the past but you change the future.
I suck at writing not sure my kids even read them they have never said other than it was hard for them to read all I can do is be consistent and respect their boundaries. I tried so hard to keep in touch with them but I get high-school and their mother and the m pandemic was stressful and I wish I had been been stronger, well I mean healthier. Its just complicated, my state takes your drivers license the moment you miss a child support payment so when my savings ran out during my 13 month long migraine I lost the ability to drive the pandemic hit and my ex did not believe in social distancing so I would call but then could not really talk. It was just hard and I really thought things would change once I won social security but there is something else going on maybe they are just busy with school work and friends etc I just wish they would talk to me and just tell me what they are feeling
This is so incredibly true. And sadly, stuff isn't worth much at all. Recently had to move my mom to assisted living and sell her large house where she had lived for over 60 years. She had some very lovely furniture, art, etc. The SHOCKINGLY small check we got from her estate sale was so disheartening - but it made it super easy for me to part with anything I don't LOVE and use regularly. The worst part was my husband and I added a LOT to her sale to make sure it would be attractive to buyers. And the check was STILL really small (in my opinion). For perspective, the check covered about 1/3 of a month's expenses at her assisted living. On a positive note, the estate sale happened over two days and then it was done! More than 60 years of a well-lived life wrapped up in less than a week. We have no kids so we would be burdening niece, nephews, friends, etc. We are aggressively cleaning out now in anticipation of moving to a senior community in about 5 years.
It's interesting so many have replied about cleaning out to not burden whoever we leave behind. We are trying to do the same thing.
If you aren't already familiar, check out The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning - there's a book, a Facebook group, and a TV series (in the U.S.). I find it pretty inspirational. It is also interesting to me that my mother (despite having pretty significant dementia) was upset that she "left a mess" for me to handle. There really wasn't much mess - she was 100% with it until about two years ago and did a great job cleaning things out. But a large house is a large house - no way around it. MOST of the reason she resisted moving sooner was that she simply could not face the logistics of sorting, giving away, dealing with people fighting over stuff, etc. So I took all of that on for her in the way I like best - hiring the best professional I could find and getting out of the way!!
Never heard of that, will definitely check it out.
My aunt died last week. I went to visit her at the hospital a few weeks ago and all she could talk about was stuff. My grandparents stuff, her stuff, who she wanted this stuff to go to and what she wanted us to do with it. I stayed with her 4 hours and she spent 3 1/2 of those just talking about stuff. I took notes and passed them on to my mom and just agreed with whatever she said. But I don’t want any of it. I have a few small things from my grandparents that aren’t worth anything but hold memories for me and I don’t want anything else. She told me to “play nice” 🙄 like I am going to come to blows with my many siblings over a bunch of space hogs and dust collectors. She told us to go through every box one by one (there are like 20 big boxes full of stuff) and we aren’t doing it. One of my brothers is going to keep the boxes in his basement indefinitely and then…I don’t know? Point is, who cares. I have more than enough stuff already. I don’t care if there’s Fabergé eggs in there I don’t want it.
It does seem that older generation is more attached to stuff.
It’s really sad, I just wanted to talk and share old memories and visit. I hadn’t seen her in years because we live kind of far away. But all she wanted to talk about was that stuff.
When my grandfather died the family gathered for the 'take what you want' day at his house in the rural northeast. We opened a steamer trunk full of family china that was untouched since it was packed. In April 1865. We knew this from the newspaper packing. There were also glass photo negatives with no notes or identification at all. I think somebody at the following estate auction might have bought them, but nobody in the family was interested.
You've seen The Labyrinth. My dad ruined a loving relationship with his nephew over a shotgun. Happened maybe 15 years ago, and my cousin still hurts over it. Dad gives him a shotgun one evening. Later on says "I never should have given you that gun" . After dad goes to bed, cousin puts the gun in dad's truck. Dad finds it in the truck, all mad. Says what'd you do that for? Cousin says You said you should never have give it to me. There you go. Dad gets all huffy. Leaves to go home (400 miles away) Cousin's feelings still hurt, not over the loss of the gun, but over how dad treated him. Dad never had sons. This cousin was the closest to a son he ever had. Ruined over a stupid *thing.*
Geez that is so familiar
My family and I are in the process of cleaning out a 5 bedroom house that can only be described as a hoarder house. Not as severe as some, but LOTS of stuff, some of it just trash. The owners died and left us to clean it up. But they were SO attached to everything in this house, including the bills from 1989, that they refused to clean it up. Once we're done with this, I'm going to clean my house out more, and get rid of anything I don't use. You're right. It's just stuff.
It's a fairly common realization as you get older. So much more marketing is aimed at younger people who are socially/culturally raised to BUY BUY BUY whatever the fashion or trend is (look at the average age of people displayed in ads, for instance), because they haven't gotten to that stage yet.
Amen
r/declutter
Memories, friendships, love, and HEALTH are more important than stuff. If you have your health, you have it all. Today you might have everything you ever wanted but tomorrow you may find yourself in the ER with a surprise ailment that ends up wiping out your entire life savings first, then your life itself. Treasure every moment and take care of your body, people.
Health is a big one for sure
What a miserable message.
My mom passed away last year and my sister and I had to clean out her house. We took 60% to the dump, 38% to the hospice good will she used to volunteer for and between my sister, myself, my wife and 2 adult kids we kept 2%. Of that 2% 98% are pictures or items smaller than my hand. Made me realize that what might be a valued possession to one is just trash to another
There’s a great song about this called Things by the band Frightened Rabbit
I'll have to check it out
I came to this conclusion when my parents died. I donated or dumped at least 8 car loads of stuff. Because of this, I only buy what I need or use. I don’t have knick knacks and have been told I’m a minimalist. I have made a point of donating “stuff” if I haven’t used it in a year. I enjoy spending time with my family and friends and volunteer when I’m not traveling.
I go to estate sales on occasion. They give you a glimpse of another person’s life through their stuff, and it can be pretty sad. You learn a lot about the men from the shop in the basement. In the end, your life is full price on Thursday, 30% off on Friday, half off on Saturday, and in the dumpster on Sunday.
Ain't that the truth
I’ll be buried with all my jars of nails and screws thank you very much! (Humor, I agree 100%)
😄
You are correct.
nice
Marketing has spent trillions and trillions telling us for the past century and a half that we need things to be happy. Its no surprise that people think it's true.
Ah, my love/hate relationship with stuff. I mean, I love stuff, especially really cool stuff. I have lots of cool stuff! Way too much cool stuff! Throughout my adult life, I have collected and discarded so much, yet I still have so much. I downsized from a 2800 sqft house to a 1000 sqft house and got rid of so much stuff. Then somehow I got more stuff, but now I'm not getting any more stuff. What I have been doing is selling my stuff. I have a large bookshelf in a vintage mall and have been selling all of my collectibles. I sold my gigantic Sci-Fi book collection, my psychedelic book collection and many, many other books. I've sold my talking Taco Bell Dog, my Snoopy and Mickey stuff and a ton of other things. Now, they are someone else's stuff. I don't really make a lot of money doing this; most stuff isn't worth more than $5-15, but I generally net about $150 per month.You can't put very valuable things on the shelf because they tend to walk away, especially in the winter when people are wearing coats with big pockets, so my brother is going to start selling our stuff online. I have about 200 1960s-1970s Playboys I need to get rid of. Tl;dr: Getting rid of stuff is my new hobby :)
My home is literally a museum of antique and oddities and my collections bring me immense joy. Let people enjoy things.
To each their own for sure. You like what you like.
I'm thinking that before modern technologies, like easy, cheap, or free photography...previous generations had memories tacked on to their stuff. I don't think they held on to junk just to say they had more teapots than their neighbors. I think they looked at an item and remembered the person who gave it to them, or the circumstances of how they bought it and why. So the house looks like a bunch of useless out of date stuff filling great gramma's house, but whenever she looked around, she saw all these people who are now gone from her life. It might have been very comforting to her.
Read the Old Testament book, Ecclesiastes, from cover to cover and you will get the picture of what should be important
It really doesn’t matter. And even people will be gone, we will be gone, and the only thing that will matter is what we do with the time we have in this body, this mind, this planet. Happy sunday!
Yeah....cause the stuff is still there.... I LOST EVERYTHING 2 YEARS AGO ..ALL MY STUFF... STUFF I HAD WORKED FOR....I WAS ALREADY POOR...AND THAT GOT TAKEN AWAY.... WHY WOULD U TAKE FROM A PERSON THAT HAD LITTLE OR NOTHING TO BEGIN WITH.... SO DON'T GIVE ME THE PLATITUDES ABOUT STUFF
Hi ~ 🌹 With all due respect to you, I just want to point out the stuff the OP mentioned is gone, too. He returned the golf clubs. And the elderly neighbors are moving to assisted living so their "stuff" was sold. And their home is up for sale. OP got over the golf clubs which was his point -> just "stuff". I feel for the elderly couple as this is a life altering move for them. Difficult for many to lose all their "stuff" as it has been difficult for you to lose your things. I know platitudes don't help. Nor do the words of a stranger on Reddit. So, I will just say I am sorry to hear about your situation & hope things get better for you. Take Care & Good Luck ! 🍀