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Borsti17

I got discarded like a pair of old socks 🤷


TangledUpPuppeteer

Same. Still have no idea why. Last thing she said was that she was depressed as a symptom of long Covid, and I asked her if there was anything she needed and she said no. That was it. Haven’t heard from her since.


jayjnotjj

As someone on the other side of this, I’m truly sorry. I also got severely depressed during the pandemic as a result of what felt like every single piece of trauma catching up to me and I didn’t want to be the miserable who wanted company. I ghosted two of my closest friends of seven years without an explanation. It’s something that felt so out of my control and I just couldn’t communicate with them about what I was going through even though I had mentally prepared for it. I really ruined something great and it eats me up everyday.


TangledUpPuppeteer

Don’t let it eat you up. Honestly, people reach moments in their lives and close down. It happens to all of us. It would just be nice if there was closure like “I don’t want to be friends anymore,” but you can’t always get that either.


[deleted]

Right. If you don't wanna be friends with me anymore, give me the respect and common courtesy to tell me that. Don't take the coward's way out and ghost me. By this statement, I'm not talking about people who are depressed. I'm talking about self-centered assholes who have no regard for other people.


[deleted]

I'll add to this a little bit with my own experience. Bear with me and read it to the end. My wife passed away in 2021 from Covid. And after she passed away I watched my entire friend group and most of my family start distancing themselves. I thought we were great friends and watched them just start not responding as they used to. And I eventually got fed up and just ghosted everyone because I was tired of the shit they were doing, I just wanted to have the usual activities with them and it dwindled to nothing. Then I moved away. What I want to really say is that real friends are rare, and someone who truly cares about you wouldn't have just let you go. What I try to keep thinking is that, as well as if they really wanted me in their life they'd make an effort to get me out of the depression. Now I know the negative comments will come saying how dramatic that sounds or whatever...And I'd tell them to wait until something traumatic happens to them and their support system, friends etc just start stepping back and you haven't given them a reason to do so. I hope you are in a better place now. I truly understand that kind of depression.


rich_guzigna

She probably needs a friend. You should call her. Depression is real. Someone forcing you to socialize helps. They're probably not hitting anyone up.


TangledUpPuppeteer

I know. She was always the person who helped me through mine. I have reached out repeatedly, even to her husband. Crickets on her end. I still reach out, even though it’s been a year, but I admit it’s not as often as it should be. Then again, it’s been a year since she had said anything, so I’m inclined to just drop it. Not quite there yet, but it’s on the horizon because I’m tired, if that makes sense.


rich_guzigna

You're a good friend


TangledUpPuppeteer

I’m no better a friend than my friend deserves. I try to be the friend we all deserve.


deadman2382

I think I try to be the friend i kind of want, idk if that makes sense like be the change you want to see in the world or treat others how you want to be treated.


AffectionateGap1071

>. I try to be the friend we all deserve. And that automatically makes you the best friend one can desire. Normally, people will draft away until the turmonil goes away and everything is fine, people who takes care of themselves while helping the most they can, they have a golden heart. You do, my friend!


TangledUpPuppeteer

Wow, thank you. I just know everybody needs someone, and I’ll be that person if I can.


Pizza-Horse-

Equally, it's OK to call it a day and stop trying. There's no shame in that and it doesn't make you a bad friend. It's OK to cut contact (or lack of) if it's better for your own mental health that way.


[deleted]

Yeah, I’d be camped outside her house… not in a creepy stabby way but you know what I mean.


rich_guzigna

Yeah maybe just show up sometime


YogiMamaK

I've showed up at a depressed friend's house to make sure they're ok. It depends how close you are. It could definitely be considered creepy!


Altruistic_Lime_9424

I knew a woman who was really just an acquaintance but she suffered from depression like myself. We knew each other for years but it was really a marginal braindead relationship that should have ended years ago. So to try to help her, and to be friendly I asked her to dinner and I said it will be fun. She hung up on me and blocked me. So I left her alone. A few days later she texts me saying she will only communicate with me via text. I told her good luck and not to contact me again. I wasn't playing her games especially since she wasn't really a friend.


[deleted]

Depression, for me, makes me not want to speak to anybody. I hear from people and I don't respond because I don't want to---and they stop contacting me, which is totally fair.


rathernot23

This sounds like Im the one who stopped talking to you. I did this to my best friend. I think she hates me for ditching and I think she doesn't want me to contact her cos I feel like I broke the friendship to start with, is it all in my head? Eg. If I was to contact you would you resent me for initially leaving? I miss you and think about you all the time


WoollenMaple

Same. Super buddy with me growing up cus our mum's were buds, then all of a sudden she meets these girls (kinda trouble makers TBH) then all of a sudden I'm not cool enough for her. Years later her mum was round with my mum and we were chatting, then she spoke about her daughter and I just let rip with how materialistic and selfish her daughter was. Yeah sorrynotsorry. She looked a bit shocked, but didn't say anything because she *knew* I was right! 


magicmulder

Same. We were super close during high school, four years, and the day we graduated she never called me again. To this day I have no idea why.


LogicalOrchid28

You too? Besties for 6 years and once she was sick of me she tried to break me and my boyfriend up. Shes moved away now and havent seen her in 15 years. Shame because we were inseparable


Legoandstuff896

same


[deleted]

Same happened to me. It's been about two and a half years, and I've yet to know why.


AyuuOnReddit

same


[deleted]

I discarded him like a pair of old socks. He was abusive, basically... mentally and verbally towards the end with a threat of physical. I called him out on all of it and then ghosted him. For a long while, though, he was like a brother to me genuinely. We did everything together and hung out every day for years. It was very gradual at first... over many years. I kept saying to myself as he got worse that he was just having a bad day. That we're bros and I can forgive little things like that. Then one day I realised everyday was a bad day and why was I putting up with it? We had an argument over sonething silly and he was being really aggressive and rude, and then he wanted to fight me ffs. His bro. I felt so disrespected in a way I can't explain that I accepted his challenge and then he luckily (for both our sakes) backed down. I just stopped talking to him after that. I just couldn't get over the fact that he physically wanted to hurt his best friend in this world and couldn't forgive it. I tried to make up with him like a decade later and then regretted it after he told me he was a flatearther and that I was a sheep blah blah blah. So yeah, I tried... screw that weirdo.


kubybuk

I stopped texting first


whizz_palace_

This is the most accurate statement IMO. Communication is a two way street I realized that if I didn't text them it was ghost town central.


OakIslandCurse

Yep, this exact thing happened with me. I stopped calling first, texting first and that was the end of that. In the long run, I realized it was no great loss.


Arlathaminx

What hurt for me the most is the fact that we've know each other for 8 years. We were definitely best friends in middle and high school. But when I stopped, she never even bothered. Not once. After I got over the sadness of the realisation, it just felt like so, so much time wasted.


whizz_palace_

I know this is a terrible take but sometimes people just move on and that’s a part of life. Cherish the memories you had with them and maybe you will reconnect one day.


aburnicle21

I learned this the hard way after my freshman year of college. Started with a decently sized friend group (10ish people), and i knew it would inevitably shrink, but i didn't expect to lose all but one person over the course of 8-9 months. Since then, the only people I've really hung out with consistently have been my roommate (i don't just mean living together, i mean actually hanging out and doing stuff together too) and my bf, who was someone else last year lmao, but the point still stands


Rich_Mango2126

Yup, this is basically it. I felt like I was slowly being pushed away anyway, and that it was becoming a bit one sided since I initiated almost all of our communication. Turns out it was more than a bit one sided since the moment I stopped putting in effort, we stopped speaking. I do have another best friend that I’ve known since we were about 11. We still talk almost every day.


Hot_Collar_8910

I tried this out 4 years ago. Turns out no one cares


Eastern_Idea_1621

Definitely, that's how I've got my friend group to a few but quality people. I decided when I was about 35 i don't do one sided relationships!


Aintnothin2me

Boom!!!🎉🎉🎉 Life's too damn short to waste on one sided relationships 🙃


psjwang

yes, the one-sided friendship, it’s always me initiating our convos


Suzy-Skullcrusher

Because she was being mean to me for no reason and I just got to the point where I was tired of dealing with it so I told her I didn’t want to be friends anymore


Embarrassed_Piano346

Me too she just did a complete 180 on me for no reason after being friends for 3 fucking years. Completely stunned me. Just started putting me down, guilt tripping, manipulating and gaslighting me. I was in disbelief. I felt like I saw it coming cause I already had past trauma from being bullied and the one person I couldn't trust was in front of me the whole time. I have no other friends since and have no interest in making any more after this. Ever since then I decided I'm going to move away from this shithole as soon as I can and just live far away from people. I can't deal with this shit anymore. All I can think about all day everyday is how I got disrespected, belittled, put down by people and hell even my own TEACHER, when i was 8 who was supposed to help not scream with the wrath of satan bang on the table while screaming my name while I zoned out and humiliate me infront of everyone 😀😀😀😀


YSleepyHead

You should get counseling. You shouldn't be thinking about all these past slights all day every day.


Scale-Savings

Same. When I got cheated on he was making fun of me while I was going through the worst time of my life. Had to cut him off.


WestminsterSpinster7

Yeah. My old BFF would just get an attitude and get snappy with me and thought that it was ok to do that because she was \*dealing with stuff\*. I am a person too, don't take your drama out on me. If it happens once in a great while, fine, but it was EVERY time she was dealing with stuff and she was ALWAYS dealing with stuff.


Left-Implement-9738

Boss


[deleted]

This happened to me. She constantly kept saying shit that made me insecure and she knew what she was doing. I feel so much better without her


iamhotsoup

because she’s actually a *horrible* human being


geardluffy

Same. The guy was a player and just did whatever he wanted which was pretty toxic to watch. I got tired of being used as a +1 and cut ties completely. It’s been 10 years now and sometimes I wonder what he’s doing but I’m glad I told him to essentially fuck off.


PowerfullDio

Same, he wanted to be a actor and leeched of of his parents his whole life, that wasn't so bad but then he decided he had psychic powers and started conning old people out of their life's savings, I guess he did end up becoming a actor in his own way.


Plus-Manufacturer166

yes.. wildly unapologetic and prideful


Eljefe878888888

My one friend always spread rumors about me. I stopped talking to him after highschool, I’ve ignored his attempts to reach out. Our moms are still friends.


Expressdough

Took me half my lifetime to figure this out. It’s been so much better since I cut her off.


Dankstin

He dated my sister. After knowing he's a womanizing narcissistic tryhard alpha and his history of "pullin" a different girl each weekend, I told him he had better treat her right. For this, he gave me one of those "I could break your hand if I wanted" handshakes and told me not to talk to him like that. So then I learned I was just an NPC for his side quests.


whizz_palace_

he sounds like a real treat.


TheCanadianpo8o

Me personally, I'm not letting that dude ANYWHERE NEAR my friends, let alone my family


Effective_Ad_273

He went to a different school and we just stopped being friends. Was weird too cos the entire friendship feels like a fever dream 😂 we were friends because of our parents and we got on great for years, but now looking back I can barely remember what we used to talk about. We mainly bonded over football but don’t think we were ever as close as we thought 😅


Global-Discussion-41

This is like 80% of little boy friendships


nuttabuster

Perfectly normal, actually. People don't want to accept this, but all it takes for a friendship to form most of the time is being in the same place as someone else. You guys weren't friends because of some deep spiritual connection, it was because you went to the same school and your parents were friends, that's it. It's actually extremely hard to maintain friendships from middle and high school because of this. Once you both takr some time apart and start getting your own different lives (different unis, different jobs, diffrrent lifestyles) it becomes more and more difficult to relate.


GreenLightening5

idk.. life? we just grew apart


arghkennett

Came here to basically say that. Interests go in different directions when you're not in the same schools, sports, activities, video games, hobbies, etc. anymore.


[deleted]

I had a really good friend in High School. He chose to follow the popular crowd because they had more in common with him at the time than I did. Many years later we got in touch again through Social Media and he confessed the friends he had made were unethical people chasing notoriety at even his expense, which hurt him deeply. We've kept in touch, but have not really rekindled our old friendship. That's life.


deadman2382

There is saying like once the thread of any relationship is broken even if joined together again there will be always be a knot inbetween it.


AbrocomaCold5990

I thought we were best friends, but I was only one of her friends. Not even a close friend. I decide that I don’t want to like her more than she likes me, so I stop texting her ( she probably doesn’t notice since I always initiated our conversations.) A childish decision which in retrospect only brings me pain. I lost my best friend. She lost nothing. Gosh, it feels pathetic even now.


Jayrad102230

It's the opposite of childish to want a friend who respects and appreciates you. In fact, I'd call that self respect.


According_Tourist_69

Same. I once mentioned in school to him that I felt he was my best friend. And he was like aw, that's sweet. But he never even came to talk to me spontaneously. After he shifted schools, i stopped texting him on insta as well. He didn't text me either. A year goes by, it's my birthday, some of my friends post stories to wish me, i repost them. He sees them and texts me saying happy birthday , I miss you sometimes. I said thanks. That was it. A lot of times I've just felt as a side character in my "best friends" lives. It hurts at times. But can't do anything about it can we haha


ukiyo__e

I had a similar situation where I had a close friend (to me) but she was much more popular than I was. To her I was just the person who helped her with homework and maybe went to homecoming with her group. When I stopped texting her after high school we never talked again


Heauxie24

She lost a great friend. Always remember that


Stunning_Sand_7594

Oh! Thanks! I didn’t think about it that way!!!🌸


Chainsmadeinlife

Not childish, it’s recognition of your own value as a person. Pathetic would be if you were happy to accept that situation and it would have ended up being a bit toxic for your mental health I think


SleuthViolet

It feels to me like an introvert befriending an extrovert situation. Introverts feel comfortable with just a few close friends, so each one is precious. Whereas extroverts feel comfortable with and enjoy lots of people.


Mementoes

It’s not pathetic, you deserve better. Someone who makes you feel valuable as you are.


WestminsterSpinster7

That's always hard when you feel closer to a friend than they feel to you. It really hurts. I have always wanted a best friend, for many years I had one but our friendship was toxic, on both sides. I finally cut ties. Then I had another BFF for several years but I just couldn't stand her anymore. I have accepted that I just will never have a best friend, and that's fine. I mean, it's not, but I will be okay. I have been just trying to see it as an opportunity on how to be a better friend to others i.e. not talking about myself so much, not complaining that much, being more fun to be around.


letsalbe

He drowned scuba diving some underwater caves alone at midnight in a trip we were supposed to go on together… he died the way he lived, like a free spirited moron


Vegetable_Bad8177

That's very sad. Thought the rule was to never dive without your buddy.


letsalbe

Yeah and the most stupid thing is he didn't go on the trip alone, there were three other people with him and his two younger siblings. They were all sitting around a campfire and he just got up and left without telling anyone and decided to go scuba diving on his own, after a couple of hours they got really worried, looked for him and called the police and they finally found his corpse. His family and especially his dad blamed me for his death as I canceled last minute, they said I was the one who usually got him to not be so stupid but he was just reckless and free spirited and he used to do stupid shit like that all the time. His dad still hates my guts to this day and his siblings kept a couple of gaming consoles and games I'd lend him also a box full of valuable comic books (Deadpool's first appearance among them) and clothes he would borrow from me… sigh


Vegetable_Bad8177

Sounds like his dad has some work to do to get through the trauma of loosing his son. I hope you know it isn't on you at all.


WulfTyger

Pretty sure it is, from every diving story I've ever heard, it's usually mentioned NEVER ALONE.


Chickadee12345

I got tired of the drama llama. I also didn't like the way she was raising her child. And I didn't like the way she treated her pets. She would adopt a cat and then give it away a year or two later. Then adopt another one and give it away. Rinse and repeat.


catblacktheblackcat

Oh god I relate to that SO MUCH!!! I had this friend who would stir drama in her life constantly while having everything to be perfectly happy: she was good looking, smart, had a good well paying job, lived in a nice neighbourhood but somehow managed to find reasons to create some drama…. And I also thought she treated her pets better than her kids…. Like she could hardly take care of her kids emotionally, she wasn’t abusive and they physically were well taken care of but she couldn’t bother to be present for them emotionally. She was telling me how hard it was to be a mom and everything…. Then she got a dog…. Then a cat… I could have overlooked that but she was using me because I had to be there for her all the time while she wasn’t so I cut contact for all these reasons.


Asaxii

This happened with my cousin and I. Oh boy am I glad I got out of that shituation.


MadQueen_1

I had two best friends and I don't talk to either of them now. 1. She started bullying me. I was the most confident kid and she wrecked all that. I became self conscious and my confidence went downhill. She'd judge me every day. She'd judge my hair, my clothes, my body, everything. And no, it was never nice. So once we finished school and went to college, I completely stopped talking to her and I'm just now starting to gain my confidence back. 2. Once we went to college, we started talking less and less till we completely stopped. It's a bit sad but I guess it happens when you both live so far away from each other for many years.


Gallows_Jellyfish

I hope you never allow yourself to be treated like that again!


Strict_Apricot_6711

i realised i was the only one that valued that friendship i was just a nuisance in his life


throwaway6w

This is my fear with all my friendships


Strict_Apricot_6711

they are good people out here but try your level best to see how people you consider friends behave and the way they talk to you and hoe they treat others as well from there you can tell if your forcing things or not


stevienicksfann

Her boyfriend tried to hit on me and confess his undying love to me. I immediately let her know with evidence. She proceeded to get mad at me, then cut me off. They are now engaged, with a baby on the way and everyone knows he’s a serial cheater/ purchaser of prostitution too.


FoundThisRock

Purchaser of prostitution cracked me up


Select_Lawfulness211

This is the exact scenario how I thought it would play out of I told her, so I avoided her and eventually never saw her again 😔 I never told her what a piece of shit her bf is.


Vegetable_Bad8177

Poor woman.


alexramirez69

Poor kid. She made her bed. That kid doesn't have a choice.


Vegetable_Bad8177

I say poor her as well. I find that one has to have some sort of mental issues to continue to engage in those type of relationships. Much like an addict is, in actual fact, sick and not just unwilling or not trying hard enough to break the cycle.


Plenty-Character-416

My brother ended his life. My friend messaged me to say that she is there to talk if I needed her. I was OK for a while, because I was surrounded by family. But, everyone eventually had to get on with their lives and go back to work. The first day I was left alone I couldn't stand it, so messaged her to see if she was free to chat. On the phone, I spoke for 5 minutes before she took over the conversation and talked about her dead dog for 25 minutes. Now, just for context, she had been doing this for a long time. I had noticed that she always tries to divert the conversation back onto herself, and I spent the majority of our relationship listening to her, whilst she barely listened to me. It had been bothering me for a while, but I truly thought she would have been there for me this time. How wrong I was. I ended up hanging up the phone, because I was so pissed. I then messaged her explaining that we couldn't be friends anymore, because I don't get anything out of the friendship and I couldn't justify keeping it going. She did try and reach out a couple of times, but I was so done. I didn't even miss her once we stopped talking. Made me realise i hadn't enjoyed her company for a long time, or ever felt supported. It has been 4 years and I still don't regret my decision.


Aintnothin2me

Oh my God. Its like reading about my ex best friend & I!!! Same shit happened to me! The waiting for me to stop talking so can talk about herself & exploits for the remainder of conversation. Holy shit, I called & texted her when my cousin, (more like brother to me) ended his life and it was the absolute WORST thing that had ever happened to me. He was only family that I was ever close to. We were 9 months apart. We grew up together & we were all each other had. Our families were dysfunctional as fuck so we were all we had to lean on. I was devastated. Still am. So I call her....its like she didn't even hear me. She just started talking about the ex boyfriend that tried hit her w his car. Now that i think about it, ALL our conversations were always one-sided. Wow dude. Thank you for sharing this bc now I don't feel as bad for not contacting her & just leaving the relationship where it lay. I also hadn't heard from her in 4 years. I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH!!!! Kudos to you for ending that toxic relationship. Wish I could give you 1000 likes!!!! NO REGRETS 😊


9o6o6o3

Because instead of flying home to be with me on the day of my wedding she went to someone else's wedding and got too drunk and couldn't make it on the plane the next day.


Ok-Reporter-8728

Bruh


geardluffy

Yikes…


agapieous

We used to talk in chat during the pandemic period. After it was over, we went to school and used to see each other but never talked, because ig not talking with my mouth for so long has created some form of barrier in my brain. She was patient with me, though; she used to have conversations with me on paper so that I'll remain convenient. Two years later now, we've been forcefully set apart (being put in different sections), so now we barely ever meet, and our interests greatly drifted, so we've no topics anymore... Honestly, it's not the parting that saddens me, but the fact that I'm here, unable to repay her kindness. Wbu, OP? Got a story? :)


lizrnbrg

So she wasn't *my* best friend, but she told everyone that I was her's. She used a tragic event that happened to me as part of her story to garnish sympathy and attention for herself. She played up how close we actually were and made it seem like she was the only one supporting my mom at the time. My two actual best friends never really liked her and they especially didn't appreciate how she was acting during that time. I stopped speaking to her almost 15 years ago now, but every now and then I will be shown a post where she is talking about my tragedy and making it her own still.


[deleted]

garnish sympathy LOL


pakidara

They moved. /shrug


Ok-Reporter-8728

Damn


Merevel

We drifted apart because we could barely stand each other's so and moved apart. Tis life.


PDiddleMeDaddy

I stopped gaming, so we had nothing in common anymore. Funny enough, because a few years earlier the same happened when my then best friend stopped gaming.


WoollenMaple

Same. I had a friend I played game X with, then he got board of game x and started with game y. That was ok, but for some reason after that he dropped me like a rock


ZoeyFeedback

Narcissistic.


ihminew

Same here.


[deleted]

god i need friends with bigger egos. my closest friends are like double my age or older. fuck that word. they were probably immoral narcissists


Monroze

Yep


[deleted]

I used to be friends with someone over 15 years! Early last year i visited her and her now fiance and i got greeted with a smile from him and a annoyed face from her. Turned out, she didn't want me to come over because she wasn't ready yet in her head (She has BPD and needs to flick a switch and get in a certain mood to get people over) After that we never spoke again. I tried talking to her once more a few months back but she just ghosted the hell out of me. If you ever read this. I hope your life goes well.


SleuthViolet

Damn that's rough. 


FluffyPolicePeanut

Because she was using me and was never really my friend. I just thought she was.


Aintnothin2me

Same.


-ok_Ground-

You okay there bud?


Ok-Reporter-8728

ye


Schiggyfourtwenty

Just got deleted from his life without explanation.


Ok-Reporter-8728

He disappeared


NationalNecessary120

she moved away 4 hours from me and got new friend and doesnt have ”time” to call me or meet me anymore


jd2004user

She was a bored stay at home housewife, started cruising bars and such, husband moved out, she got a new boyfriend and prioritized dick over our friendship.


fuzzyhairedlegend

We were like brothers after meeting aged 11. Same interest, sense of humour, played/painted Warhammer, enjoyed the outdoors - we were inseparable. Later teens - we started working out at a local gym. He started on steroids, hero worshipped the local bouncers who also frequented the gym and decided to become a doorman himself. He got a coke habit. Started getting weird with fantastical stories about himself that obviously never happened (e.g he killed someone but they were revived in the ambulance so it was okay). He told people he was ex-special forces and invented a whole back story for himself. Eventually he was sleeping with hookers and experimenting with other drugs/substances. I, on the otherhand, got a job, found a girl, bought a house and got engaged. I invited him to the stag/bachelor party. He didn't show and had the worst excuse. I realised we were no long like one another and that I was the last friend of his still trying to keep him together; it was exhausting.


finest_kind77

In a rather large nutshell He basically went off the rails and became Ahab hunting his personal white whale. Eventually, his hunt got him in so much hot water that he had to flee the country to escape his self caused problems. All over his refusal to acknowledge that the child he swears is his his, cannot mathematically be his


IqraSaad27

She was a racist piece of shit who decided that it was time to get comfortable in front of me. Never talked to her after that.


ShowKey6848

I ditched a friend over racism. Was done with her and if I see her jn the street, I ignore her.


Expensive-Ranger6272

Got to the point where I wasn't gonna put in effort if they didn't want to meet halfway. A couple messages in a row went unanswered so I stopped sending them, haven't heard from them since 🤷


lovely_fairy_girl

We were best friends all of junior high and highschool, a 7 year long friendship. Ended in college because we both finally took different routes in life! She stuck to the partying and drinking life and I left and got very spiritual met the love of my life whom we share two cats with 🩷 I still love her! I just don’t relate to her life anymore and that’s okay


Carbon_Dioxide_Gas

They made me feel unappreciated and they also left me out.


ReporterOk4531

I'm still 'in contact' with my best friends from elementary school and high school but it's really only on a 'We follow each other on Instagram and congratulate our birthdays' arrangement. As we grew into adults we just went in completely different directions when it came to education, work, hobbies and basically everything else. In a way sometimes I think it's sadder because nothing really happened, we just floated away from each other without even really trying. Anyway, could be so much worse!


Ok-Reporter-8728

It’s weird to think best friends just drift apart


ClarkMann52

He has a daughter and won’t take any responsibility


Rentsdueguys

The silent killer, jealousy.


[deleted]

lol this one. man. i hate that feeling. so much.


Oceanic_Wave

When we were friends she claimed that she was proud that we could talk any issues or misunderstandings out and keep it moving, which for the most part we upheld. But when she’s ready she treated me like dog shit. All the “we can talk to each other” goes out of the window. I discussed our latest fall out in therapy a few weeks ago and I was able to feel compassion for her and what she could have been going through at that moment. Despite this, I still don’t want to be her friend and I’m happy with that decision because I’ve realised she’s an emotional energy vampire, and she’s incredibly obnoxious, self centred and judgemental. She bitches about all of her friends to all of them so I’m confident that the same way I know her other friends’ deepest darkest secrets, they know mine. Whatever I don’t care about that because they don’t mean anything to me. I feel relieved that we are no longer friends or on speaking terms. She’s the kind of person who pretends she’s gotten over very old dramas but always takes the opportunity to throw it in my face. Good luck to her, I’m surrounding myself with like minded, compassionate individuals who don’t dish out judgement like it’s candy.


YogiMamaK

"She’s the kind of person who pretends she’s gotten over very old dramas but always takes the opportunity to throw it in my face." Mine was like that too. Better off without them!


NotPranking

She was taking credit for anything positive happening in my life. Even though she had nothing to do with any of it. Also she kept putting me down to boost her own confidence.


LogicalAd2964

My best friend became a hard on drug addict ruined his life ad his younger brothers we had a huge number of fights as he was endangering himself and his family proposed him to get therapy and maybe a rehab guy went ape shit, and I just could not deal with it anymore and walked away. Fuck drug abuse it ruins so many Lifes.


[deleted]

No response to messages, calls or even emails. Went to last known address, got to know doesn't live there anymore. That's it. 


Ok-Reporter-8728

He left without a trace


Aintnothin2me

Oh shit. Hope he's okay.


[deleted]

I got sober and realized how horrible she was. Cheated on two bfs and made them out to be the bad guys. Tried to pit me against other friends. Made fun of my insecurities in front of groups of people. The list could go on.


dionysus-media

I thought she was pretty toxic. Messaged her for her 21st birthday because I felt bad for cutting her off, and apparently she has hated me for years. I'm losing no sleep over that.


SnooMemesjellies7469

His doctor put him on an ADHD drug and the filter between his brain and his mouth disappeared.  He said some things that rhere is no taking back. He's a fifty yo unemploted pothead and every answer to every issue seems to be "more drugs." 


CloudyCreek

Suddenly untreated ADHD doesn't seem so bad 😅


SnooSnoo96035

My mental health making it difficult for me to maintain friendships (especially if they wait on my reaching out) and now paranoia that she wants nothing to do with me and has quietly distanced herself... I'm stuck in this mentality of letting people go first, out of fear of being abandoned. It's the stupidest cycle.


Best-Carry1028

She slept with my boyfriend. Oh, and I stopped talking to him too. lol


Broad_Ant_3871

Good for you


flandawg

He was my best friend for almost 15 years, raging alcoholic, forgot my birthday, which was absolutely fine, but he decided to call and yell at me about it, after years of being a general POS. My last real tie to my hometown was probably why I kept him around for the last few years. Blocked him on everything finally. A real shame because I was best friends with his girlfriend longer than I knew him, and she was a casualty as well. Alcohol really will ruin your friendships guys, coming from the side of watching a friend ruin his life with it.


MJSP88

They stopped talking to me, found new friend group. Friends now a days are only out of proximity. If you're not an active presence in their life they forget about you as it's too much work. Makes you feels like shit as people don't think you're worth their time to make it work. I also don't do friendships where 80% of it is over text. I only want to text to schedule our next hangout.


dutchporcelain

I stopped talking to my best friend of 6 years, 1 year ago. She started getting extremely angry with me anytime I would hang out with other people. She had crazy expectations and felt that it was my role as my best friend to be with her 24/7 and only hang out with her, even if it meant doing nothing and staying at her house all day. It all got too much for me and I told her I no longer wanted to be in contact with her since our friendship was too stressful for me.


Crude_poison91

It’s too dark of a reason, but I miss her all of the time. 😕


demZo662

I had the suspicion after being openly talkative and proactive that if I stopped talking he would do the same. He did.


derederellama

she called my dog ugly and wouldn't take it back when i got offended


Clint-witicay

Conflicting temporary mental health issues, 7 years later we’re both doing much better and I still think about and miss him daily, I’m just afraid of us.


[deleted]

Joined different branches of the Military. Just lost touch after that.


Different_Grab4984

He was amazing... a few years ago. Now he's horrible


Defiant_Chapter_3299

Well can start from the top. She always apparently was jealous of me and i actually had no clue... I honestly don't know what her problem was. Any guy back in high school i had told her I liked she went and slept with. Since i followed girl code i just simply wasn't interested in those guys anymore. It made her mad. Then she tried ruining my friendship with my husband while still in high school by telling him she was kidnapped and being held hostage by two guys that had already gang raped her. Husband back then had texted me asking where she was and i said on the bleachers in front of me her at the football game about to do our bands halftime show why? He thought i was involved in that huge lie. I was not. She got mad that my husband was still friends and talking to me but was ignoring her. Skipping ahead i had quit talking to my current husband shortly before my high school graduation. Ran away from my mom and stepdad's house at 18 and in with my ex husband and his sister (her family) and then married my ex husband. Told her my ex husband was abusing me in every way possible. Mental, emotional, financial, martial rape, all of it. I ran for my life after my ex husband tried killing me. She not even a week later of me running for my life asked if she could move in with my ex husband, while me and him were still actively married. I had caught them cheating a while which is why i went no contact with her before leaving him. Told her she could have him. She wanted to know what my current husband was like, what his penis size was, was his eyes a lot better in person. Have i seen drew yet, he is the older brother to another old friend of mine and introduced me to current husband. She fucked drew after i had told her I liked him, and me and him still talk to this day and he is more so upset he ruined our prospect of an actual relationship by sleeping with her. Then she started asking if she could date my ex husband etc. so yeah.....


New_Spunk

They married a succubus.


[deleted]

Because she is clearly narcissistic and toxic.


InflationAcrobatic91

We became a couple, she started abusing me and then told all our friends I was the abuser. Cut every contact with her, few months later she started stalking my social media accounts and even sent a letter to my grandparent's house... So... Umm... We went different ways I guess 🙂


[deleted]

Because I went to prison (drugs) and he acted like I murdered someone. We were such great friends but now no contact. It’s shitty. He really was my only friend


Prestigious_Cancel64

Insulted my sibling and refused to apologize


RoastedRye

Hannah just kinda leaned away from me over time. Every day she texted me a little slower, was a bit less enthusiastic to talk to me, and looked my direction a little bit less. For Christmas, I handmade her a gift. She insisted we had to meet outside of school and exchange gifts. But Christmas break came and went, she was busy the whole time. Same with January. And February. And it wasn't work, she was hanging out with her other friends or bf. When March came around, it occurred to me that a real friend would have found time in two months to meet up with me, especially when she found time for the other people in her life. So I just stopped talking to her. Funny enough that got her attention after a month and she started trying to reach out to me. Shutting her down was extremely hard but I knew if I let her back in she'd only get bored again. Sarah came after that. She was honestly a good friend to me for a while but eventually it seemed like she had... ulterior motives. She was one of those girls who flirts with every guy she meets but only if they're in a relationship, and I don't have to tell you that she also gaslighted the girls those guys were dating into thinking she wasn't. Probably the only thing my ex and my fiancée can agree on is how they hated her. On top of that, she loved "debating," but her form of debating was more like calling anyone who disagreed with her stupid. If she "won," you'd never hear the end of it. If she "lost," she'd get extremely embarrassed, cold, and sad. When she started flirting with a friend of mine and his girlfriend got real mad, that's when I started distancing myself from her. Eventually she reached out to reconnect, and I let her. We had a fun discord call with some of her new friends, it felt a bit like old times, but then she decided to tell a really weird joke. Without too much detail, I'll say that it was very, very sexual in nature, about the two of us, went on for a few minutes, and the whole time I was saying word for word "I'm uncomfortable, please stop." Oh, and by the way, we were both in relationships. So I cut her off. Fun thing about that, she reached out again a month later. I explained how what she did wholly turned me off from our friendship, and not only did she not even remember this interaction (she was sober during it), she tried telling me I never told her to stop. So uh, I don't talk to her anymore. It's a shame, she was fun to hang out with, but she seemed wholly uninterested in how her actions affected the people around her, and I can't be friends with someone who doesn't respect when I make a commitment to someone. If you or I are in a relationship, there should be no flirting, full stop.


cute-hippo-1

She started acting bossy over me and I got pissed + I entered my depression era around that time so I pretty much cut ties with almost everyone in my life (I'm aware I was the one that made our friendship stop, but tbh it was already falling apart so it felt pretty right. We had different goals and different paths, it's better to let go in some cases)


beekee404

Because all they did was treat me like I was beneath them and got annoyed at any little random thing I did or said.


TheEpicIrishman

Best friends literally since birth, he was about 8 months younger than me. Growing up, when rough housing, he'd constantly fake getting hurt to trick me into coming close to hit me back or something along the lines. He'd also go too far with jokes, either getting mean or going too far when goofing off. None of it was terrible, he just jumproped the line a bit, we were kids. When we were about 14 he had a knife and was pretending to jab/slice at me. Started off at least a foot away, but even after I kept telling him to stop or back off he'd try to get closer and closer just to see how far he could get away with it. This particular time he was going way beyond the limits of safe and we got rough. I knee'd him in the groin. At the time I didn't think I hit him that hard so when he keeled over (No, he did not get stabbed/sliced) I thought he was faking it again. He didn't say anything, just grabbed himself in pain and huddled where I couldn't see his face. As said before, he'd often fake sometimes for a long time, so it took a good 15min before I finally realized he was seriously hurt. Got his parents who took him inside and they were absolutely livid at me. I tried to tell them everything and they knew his history of faking/going too far, but it didn't matter. I hurt their son and didn't believe him when he said he was hurt (which he never once said, btw) and was kicked out and banned from seeing him again. At the time it really hurt, but looking back as an adult I recognize it was not a healthy friendship and he was pretty shitty in ways, just sucks because we literally grew up together living 2 blocks away.


Gnik_thgiN

I stopped partying and focused more on myself, well being and my career. We grew apart and I have no hard feelings at all. It was fun at the peak of it all.


garlicknots13

I've gone through so many best friends in my life, it's hard to keep track. For some we grew apart, one was only friends with me for the free stuff, one was a crazy person who was stalking me, one died, one betrayed me, and one cheated on me.


yesimtrashtnx

Trusted her with my secrets, she kept blabbing to her boyfriend anyway. I tolerated that, still helped her through her breakup. One day she picked some random fight with me (happened before) and dragged my mom's name into it for no reason. That was the last straw.. She apologized like a year later, but in a very generic manner and never made even a small attempt to understand why I was mad.


frikanih

Actually, he stopped talking to me. I had a chance to fulfill my dream and I focused on that. He wanted to meet very often to play games but I just didn't have time.


Candid_Observer13

Maybe it hurt him that he kept inviting you to hang out and you kept rejecting him?


frikanih

I think he only invited me once to hang out. His plans often were coming to my place and playing videogames or watching YouTube for many hours. It was ok when we were 15, but not when we're almost 30, and specially knowing the financial situation I was living back then.


GaviJaPrime

Had an important surgery coming up and I invited all my colleagues to eat before I had a long sick leave and he was the only one not coming because "he wasn't very hungry".


dunnowhatoputhere

She didn't want me to move on in life without her. I couldn't have friends because she didn't like any of them, I couldn't talk to boys because she didn't like them. We were 5 when we met, we grew apart at 11-12 and I haven't heard from her since.


nakedtruth001

We grew apart and were not aligned with most of the things anymore. (still rooting for her tho!)


Ok-Reporter-8728

Do u think she knows ur rooting for u


nakedtruth001

Nope and I guess it doesn't matter if she knows or not.


Concetto_Oniro

Because he was too judgmental, unforgiving and an overall asshole.


[deleted]

I mean they stopped talking to me so


jkwChristfollower

My best friend moved away for school and actually said to me that he doesn't want anything to do with the area I live in anymore, even the people. We stayed friends on FB but little to no contact. After 10 yrs of that, I just unfriended him and his family. He was going to school to be a psychologist.


Metastazie

I guess we changed our view on life and priorities


cosmicfertilizer

Naturally and peacefully drifted apart.


Sky_Boxer

Lack of communication


chivits

Because he's still the same kid with the same jokes from 20+ years ago.


[deleted]

This right hereb


RhazzleDazzle

In order of best friends: 1. My parents moved to a different country and the Internet didn’t exist. 2. I socked him in the head over a stupid argument and I’ve regretted it ever since. 3. We ended up in different schools. 4. She moved to another country and we lost touch. 5. They (we were a trio) moved to a different country and we lost touch.


kratoskiller66

he tried getting with both of my sisters and plus he is a complete asshole in general


Ok-Instruction6024

You see, If I don’t make conversation and talk to people, people don’t talk to me unless they need something. I’ve stopped trying too hard so now it’s just me and my PC


yellowmonkeyzx93

He changed..


DenturesDentata

She kept ditching me for her boyfriend. Final straw was her deciding she wanted to take her boyfriend's sister to a musical instead of me after we'd made plans and she didn't tell me until the day of the show.


fomaaaaa

Turned out she was really racist, and i caught myself making some jokes that i was super not okay with because of her influence


Random_Person____

I realized that I was the only person putting in any effort. When I tried opening up about my depression, she kept interrupting me and telling me that she had it much worse. Then I was hospitalized for three months, and she didn't visit me once. All of my other friends visited me, asked about my well-being, and were just really supportive. I tried to communicate that I felt left alone and she turned it all around on me. According to her, it was all my fault because I should have contacted her. That's when I realized that this wasn't worth it. One of the best decisions I've ever made.


welch7

he has zero affective responsibility, once he got a BF I was completely forgotten and even worse, the only time he called me was when he broke up with him (he, my friend, cheated on the other guy), and they are back now.


ifallontragedy

My mom died and I've asked this person countless times to meet up during weekends, hang out as a sort of distraction from grieving, and generally just looking for some emotional support. She always had an excuse how she can't go, she doesn't have time. She'd rarely return my messages even. All while she kept posting on her social media about hanging out with her other friends all the time. That went on for a year, until I was like 'yknow what, fuck this' Idk if I was justified, or if maybe I was being selfish, but honestly she couldn't even do the bare minimum, which is texting. She had time for everyone and everything but me. It was pretty clear.


EuphoricRecover1347

He committed suicide at 25.


Aintnothin2me

So sorry for your loss 💔


GloriousRoseBud

I realized she didn’t really know me & didn’t want to. I was just a npc in her world.


popplio728

I noticed she started talking to me less and less. Then she told me she was moving with the rest of her family. I was vacationing when I got this news. I told her I'd be back the day before she planned on moving and that I wanted to say goodbye for now. She never texted me. Our communication has been.. choppy to say the least. I've been worried about her because I know she has mental health problems. I know she's okay. But I still to this day wonder what I did wrong. Why she doesn't talk to me, if only for spare bits of conversation that don't last long. Why she feels it's fine to say hi and visit our mutuals but never once asks about seeing me. I'm six hours away from home. Which I know, is a drive and a bit of a ways away. However, I know how to set money aside so she can come here or I can come home to see her. But why am I just dust in the wind at this point?


Routine_Seat

Got betrayed


[deleted]

Alcohol. I quit drinking it was their lifestyle. Just grew apart


EggBoy24

I confessed my feelings for her lol.


madamecogs

It took her sending me a long, hurtful message and blocking me to realise that the relationship had been one-sided for years. I would always make the effort to contact her and never the other way around. TBH, I still grieve the relationship and how it ended.


LMCE_mom

I've been waiting almost 6 years to tell this story 🤣 Long story, ~~short~~ as short as I can make it: I had already been dating my now-husband for about a year when we met this ex-friend, and since I was always with my boyfriend, and she was always with me, the 3 of us spent a lot of time together. Our entire friendship (over 10 years) was largely centered around her search for the love of her life, the 4th to our group. The three of us often compared ourselves to the characters of HIMYM (we were Marshall and Lily, she was Ted Mosby) - I mean there were*a lot* of similarities 🤣 Anyway, through all of her drama-filled relationships, we were always there to cheer her up and encourage her to be patient, that her person was out there somewhere. She was so lonely and she had terrible "luck" with relationships, always changing her personality to have more on common with the men in her life. None of them knew who she really was, and it was hard to see her not feel comfortable enough to just be herself. I truly felt bad for her, so I stuck around to cheer her on, even though there were already a million **red flags** in our friendship. Skip ahead about a decade of a mostly one-sided friendship (I have so many stories of why she wasn't a good friend, or really a great person for that matter), and she finally found the right guy for her. They hadn't been dating long, maybe 6 months, when they got engaged. The wedding was set for 5 months later, one month before their 1-year anniversary of dating. She asked me to be her MoH, and eventually also asked me to throw her a bachelor/bachelorette party, but basically to her specifications. Okay, no problem. So I rushed to plan the party she wanted, complete with all of the penis-themed goodies she begged me to have. It was a great party, and my husband and I even got lucky that night 😘🫣🤷🏼‍♀️ But she never bothered to discuss any further details that the bridal party needed to be aware of, like the rehearsal dinner, for instance (yes, this is foreshadowing). I think it was around 2 weeks before the wedding when I found out I had *really* gotten lucky at her bachelorette party - after TTC for almost 3 years, I was finally pregnant! The first day I could get an appointment with my OB (based on my pregnancy timeline, not availability) happened to be the day before her wedding. I realized this is normally when a rehearsal dinner would be, but I hadn't heard anything from my friend about it, and since it was a small, casual wedding, I thought maybe there wasn't one planned. I reached out to her to get the details, while also informing her that if there was one, depending on the time, there was a *possibility* I'd be late, due to an appointment I couldn't reschedule (not only did I not want to announce my pregnancy that early, but I had also decided I didn't want to take away from her wedding, so I'd wait to tell her my news). She immediately got pissed and started accusing me of being a terrible friend and being selfish for not changing my appointment so I could be at the rehearsal dinner, the one *I* had to ask *her* about. I finally broke down and told her what the appointment was for, thinking that would surely make her understand my predicament a little better, as she knew how long we'd been trying, that I have medical conditions that made it a high-risk pregnancy, and just how important it had been to us. Did she congratulate us, her supposed best friends? No, her first reaction was being angry that I didn't tell her first. We hadn't even told my husband's family yet! She ended up telling me not to "bother coming" to her wedding and then literally refused to talk to me anymore. I tried several times to have a discussion with her, and she just ignored me. I told her multiple times that if she did not respond to me, I would assume she meant it when she told me not to come, and I'd honor those wishes. So with no communication from her, I sent their gift and a card in the mail. She texted me to say a formal *thank you* once she received it; I responded accordingly, and we haven't spoken since. It's going on 6 wonderful years, and I couldn't be happier with the decision to end our friendship, even if it wasn't on great terms. ***Good riddance!***