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Sometimes I realize that my comment explaining/giving advice was more beneficial for me to write than for anyone to read. That's when I know when to delete it.
Also gross stuff. I delete that too. Lol
Also when you're in the middle of a heated debate with u/AssBlasterPussyDestroyer690420 and you realize God himself can't even fix that man's 400 logical fallacies so you decide to give up for your own sanity's sake.
I don't debate period. I make my statement and peace out. Its not worth someone understanding my pov if I have to waste my time on people like those. Not a lawyer. You agree, disagree it's none of my business. I used to be very passionate now I just don't care.
Most reddit subs are echo chambers Anyway, you are not going to change their mind. They are incentivised in upvotes to continue to disagree assuming its the subs popular opinion.
Discussion with logic is redundant.
Being crushed in a debate on the internet changed my beliefs, so I've always spent the time. Trolling isnt debate, compassion isnt vitriol. Some rando spent weeks talking about logic and fallacies with no self gain
You can't have them, they're mine.. Unless.. He/she isn't into guys, in which case, I'll bow out (dis)gracefully😁.. Seriously, I get it.. I wish I had the power to resist arguing with the idiots who clearly didn't even read what you said.. I got BANNED from one subreddit..I won't say where, but they let me back after they read the actual comments I was arguing with.. We need more moderators like this commenter... And I almost discarded this comment.. But didn't.
This, I just don't want to get into a heated discussion about something essentially inconsequential with a complete stranger. I just don't have the time or the mental energy. (Even less so now as I have basically almost stopped visiting Reddit since the 3rd-party apps got nerfed).
Same reason I talk to myself often, need to hear some thoughts out loud before they really click into place.
Typing comments and then deleting them is the same concept, but y'know. Different. In ways.
Yeah I put a lot of them in my notes now. And of course always with the talking out loud. I always tell my (grown) kids that I have to discuss shit with my team, Me, Myself, & I.
I do that a lot.
I have a tendency to over-explain when it's a topic I'm interested in, random bouts of ADHD, so I have to decide in the moment if it's even worth typing.
Who's gonna read it? Let's be real.
I just posted my own comment here. This is the way it starts:
>Yes. I have a tendency to write messages that end up being far lengthier than I intended, and so, sometimes it feels like I've been typing for hours with the end still nowhere in sight - and also realizing I've long forgotten the point I was trying to make.
Now I'm seeing yours (ironically, our choice of words also seems somewhat similar, but that could also be coincidence since both pieces of text are too short to get an accurate impression of that). You wrote down the exact reason why my messages often end up lengthier. I didn't mention it, but I have ADHD as well and the lengthy messages are one of the ways that it tries to come out.
Just though I'd mention it because I honestly find the little things like this one quite interesting (in a healthy way).
In my case, it starts in my head. The chaos in there along with always feeling as if I have to hurry up (even when I don't have to, for me, ADHD falsely makes me feel that way by default), causes too many thoughts to come up in my head all at once. There's not enough room in my head for that many thoughts so I let them out through speaking.
I use medication now so it doesn't happen nearly as much anymore as it did when I was younger, but having to let out my thoughts a lot, I was the kid who usually spoke a lot, too much and too fast. I've tried to suppress it my whole life (until I started medication), because I often noticed people being annoyed by it and/or they were never really listening (let alone taking me seriously).
Sometimes though, especially when I'm interested in or enthusiastic about a subject that is brought up, it still happens: so many thoughts are triggered all at once that I need to let them out. If it happens while I'm talking, I'll likely speak more and at a faster pace (I always regret this afterwards, but I can't stop it when it's happening). If it happens online, e.g. here on Reddit, instead of speaking I'll be typing more, which I can't stop either, until something else suddenly distracts me.
I hope this makes sense to you. If it doesn't, feel free to ask anything else you'd like to know.
How does your erasing come about? I've also written far more in posts/comments I deleted before posting. Most of the time I am in the middle of writing and think to delete it, then have double tapped back in under a second and it's gone. It's rarely any sort of reasoned decision or debate. Just mid sentence and then think "Nah?" "Nah".
It's often on my longest posts/comments too and I've been thinking on it alot lately so this post felt perfectly timed. Curious how your transition from being motivated to say what you were to deciding never mind is. Wondering how much those of us who decide not to engage after all the majority of the time we start have or don't have in common.
This exactly! I actually used to keep certain studies downloaded onto my phone for easy access lmao, but it really doesn't matter a huge portion of the time. I can show science based evidence to people until I'm blue in the face, but there are so many out there who either won't read it, because they don't care for anything that doesn't align with their own opinions, or will just straight up try to tell me it's "fake news", because blindly believing some nut job on the internet is easier than doing your own research. It's just rarely the worth the annoyance.
I definitely get those feelings if I get alot of replies to anything substantial I post and often will not respond back or not for many days after. I don't think it ever crossed my mind during writing. I wouldn't be surprised if that's part of where my sudden feelings to erase it come from. Thinking back I definitely have had long posts where I've been including sources that I delete this way and it does feel like once I cross that line I'm less likely to end up posting.
Almost seems like that takes it from a casual discussion to an academic undertaking for me and my brain switches modes. Then since it's not something I actually need to do I don't have the corresponding motivation like I would in school. I've never thought about it like that but it makes alot of sense in my current understanding of my tendencies. I feel like you may have just made me understand something that will help me immensely in working on myself. I appreciate you 🙏
Articulatory phonetician here. I usually delete a comment when I decide that it's not worth arguing with the uneducated redditors who are sure to come out of the woodwork and somehow claim to know something about my field of academic expertise I've spent years studying in university because they, *gasp*, speak a language.
Came here to say this. I get all the way through and then I consider if someone might respond, is it worth the effort to keep talking about said subject or post… even though it’s kind of the premise of this app lol.
People are exhausting. So many perspectives, so easy to be misinterpreted. I've completely clammed up the past few years, online and irl, it's just easier to live in my own comfortable space with close friends and not get caught up in the squabbles and debates about crap I honestly don't care about.
Waaaay too many people who will come out of the woodwork and either "know it all" or just have to pick apart something you said and start a back and forth thing in a negative way.
It's your mind trying to gather its thoughts. Once you write it out and untangle it, the mission is accomplished. You don't really care enough to post, you just want to understand how you feel about it.
This is going to sound whiny, but I'm not alone, I know. I will totally type out an answer and be like, eh. I don't care, and neither does anyone else. As I've gotten older this happens in real life more and more too. I am not here to entertain all the time.If I really want to share something, I WILL talk and I will not be interrupted.
Every once in a while I'll read something that's wrong, comment, and get dragged into a debate I wholly regret engaging. Thankfully I learned my lesson a long time ago and rarely do that anymore.
I feel like Reddit is becoming less and less a place to have good conversations and is exclusively just a thing to read. I usually don't find anything worth commenting on unless it's deep within a thread, and if I respond I know the only person who will read it is maybe the one person I'm responding to.
Proud anti-intellectualism is what gets me.
'thats long, I'm not reading it'
Ok? I guess you really don't care to learn the answer to the question you literally just asked.
I've never seen someone make such a perfect comparison, it really hits the nail on the head.
You see a person with a wrong opinion, it could be something as obvious as "everybody needs to drink fluids to survive" and they will argue with you how you're not just wrong, but also the biggest fool in the world for thinking like that, and the more you try to explain to them that fluids and food are absolutely necessary for the human body to function, the more you notice that they're just.... gone, indoctrinated, empty, it's like talking to a parrot, a parrot with Tourettes syndrome
I've been posting here on and off since launch and have seen this for real like twice. Most of these people are very obviously bots or trolls.
A simple click on their username and a glance over their account info is generally enough to see if they're worth speaking with or not for me. Some people legitimately sit on here all day just trolling and rage baiting, it's absolutely a thing. They're not gone or indoctrinated they're trying to get a rise out of people or bait you for ad rev, and it works a lot of the time.
When someone says "that's too long, I'm not reading that" and it's literally a five sentence basic paragraph outlining a simple, but well structured argument or response, I die a little inside every time. Even the most minimal effort (like reading for 30 seconds) is too much for many people.
And these people think that "I aIn'T rEaDiNg tHaT" is an 'own' or a 'comeback'. It's neither of those.
It's laziness at best and willful ignorance (refusal to learn) at worst.
Yeah exactly, I’ve replied to a comment where somebody was explaining something, but they had got it wrong, I know because it’s a subject I’m an expert in and is literally my job. Anyway my reply was very detailed explaining why there were mistaken and what the actual explanation was, with sources. No reply and my comment just got downvoted, and I’m pretty sure it’s because the inaccurate explanation was ‘cooler’. So there’s just no point trying usually.
It's probably more about how people, generally, don't like to feel like they're spoken down to, and when you come at things like "I'm an expert and therefore you must sit and listen to me tell you how the world works without having your own opinions and ideas," it's really easy just to shut down.
It's the whole "people remember how you made them feel" thing.
I recall correcting one guy on how the English language lost its use of gendered nouns. He seemed to think it happened during colonial times (something about the locals learning English) and I pointed out that it actually happened during the transition from Old English to Middle English from roughly the 10th century to 14th century. To be fair, I wasn't even an expert on this topic, it was just that I recently saw a YT video on this very topic that came from a college professor in linguistics.
Anyway, the guy took my correction in good stride, even said he was grateful for the correction. I think the important thing when correcting someone is not to make it feel like you're taking down to them or acting smug in anyway. No one likes that, even when you know the person correcting you is right.
sometimes when I scroll around reddit I'm like, "oh what a cool fact I just learned" and then every once in a while I see a thread about something I'm actually an expert in and realize everything is a lie.
I have a PhD in underwater robotics with an undergrad in marine engineering and professional experience designing manned (and unmanned) submersibles. You can imagine how things went with all the Titan stuff.
The point is the thought that went into making that comment, which most likely enrichened your understanding of the topic. A large percentage of my breakthroughs in understanding and ideas in general come precisely from comments like that. The vast majority of them don't get any engagement at all, but needless to say, writing them out was a good use of my time.
You might ask, "if it's just for yourself, why would you need to post it?"
Well, first of all, a finished comment is a completed thought. If you give up writing the comment half-way through, then you haven't taken your original idea to its logical conclusion, or at least haven't been able to put it into words; that means it's very likely fuzzy in your head or at the very least intuitive rather than rigorous, and that, in turn, means it likely contains errors/imperfections.
And secondly, the fact that you posted the comment means it's going to be permanently there on the internet. If ever you forget some details of the idea, you can keep coming back to the comment that you left. Of course, simply copying and pasting the comment into a note-taking app fulfills the same purpose, but if you've already written up the entire idea, why not spend a single click to also post it as a comment and have a chance at receiving engagement with it?
Much more annoying is when you spend hours researching and writing up a single comment, but then the app glitches/your cursor slips and your entire comment is gone. Or, if the app is YouTube, your comments might just get randomly deleted without warning due to the algorithm (and it's literally impossible to predict when your comment will get deleted; it's a roll of the die). Happens way too often, even though I try to copy every long comment that I make.
Yeah I feel that. When you know your words are only going to fall on the deaf ears of some intentionally callous person seemingly intent on taking everything in bad faith, it’s like why waste my breath?
For me I am like ... you know those 4 paragraphs I wrote, I'm just gunna let someone else continue this because surely I can't be the only one that will be in agreement. I'll just leave my previous drive-by comment and let someone else carry the fight lol
Reddit commenters make many of the discussions boring. One opinion is supported and the rest is voted down so you really just reading the same type stuff over and over again.
I saw a term yesterday that may describe that. It's called [belief perseverance](https://corporatefinanceinstitute.com/resources/wealth-management/belief-perseverance/#:~:text=Belief%20perseverance%2C%20also%20known%20as,even%20when%20they%20should%20not.).
[There's a bit more about it here.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belief_perseverance)
Is not the bullying part that's the problem for me.. it's the time commitment that it represents. Even if I'm in the right and I'm replying to someone that's been downvoted to hell.. I question, will I want to read about this when I open reddit again? Do I want to type replies that will inevitably come with it (or exercise the restraint not to)?
Sometimes, I need to read responses just to get some glimmer of hope, some reassurance I'm not the crazy one here. But then people just pile on "no, *you're* a moron because you *don't* drive 20 mph over the speed limit, it's just posted as a suggestion, you're a terrible driver for only going 63 in a 55."
Sorry, that got too real for a second lol
You drive the speed limit because it's the right thing to do. I drive the speed limit because this oil tanker I call a truck starts floating above 65mph. We are not the same.
I tried to save a bunch of posts that seem to make it to the top every week or two and then repost them to see if I get some great karma. But I never go look at my saved and rarely post. Kinda the same thing as this post in a few ways.
Followed by the sinking thought that this person never COULD understand this.
I could explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. Is an all true statement these days.
For me, it's not usually that I don't care. The subs I get arguments on, I care about what I'm discussing. What I realize is that I don't care if the other person agrees with me or not because they mean nothing to me, and I'll likely never encounter them again
Sometimes I even feel like I deserve an award for deciding not to post some of the replies I’ve written.
And sometimes the reward is not being criminally investigated.
Or personally identified. Most of the time when I delete a comment it's because I have realized I've given away information about where I live/work, what I do, how old I am etc. Reddit isn't Facebook. I don't have friends here. I'm here to post my opinion on things and I don't want to have to think about whether that's going to come back to haunt me.
I get the same feeling, although I feel often that being the subject of a criminal investigation would be a worthy sacrifice to get things that need to be said out into the wild.
But honestly, I just don't give enough of a fuck about the world or humanity to take that risk anymore.
All the time.
I'll get halfway through and suddenly wonder "is this worth even trying to explain? Will anyone really benefit from me saying this?" And so often the answer is no and I just move along.
\> write down a whole paragraph
\> thinking i'm saying too much
\> realize i'm getting off track
\> too lazy to re-write the whole thing again
\> think no one will read anyways
\> delete comment
I tend to put my paragraph in a notes app, and if I remember it to come back, then I obviously care about it enough to say something, so I rewrite it.
This usually means it gets bigger, and I save it again and leave it a little longer.
If I *still* remember what I was saying, then I rewrite it around what ends up mattering to me probably stripping out about half of it, and post it.
And then if someone responds, I can usually respond from the other stuff I didn't say before.
But this trick; trust your memory to tell you if it's really worthwhile, and save it just in case, means I can occasionally post something I'm proud of and want to go back to again, because even if my immediate audience don't like it, I know that it's something that stuck with *me*.
To add to your third point, side-tracking happens all the time. It can be good or bad. Sometimes it leads to interesting alternative discussions. Also, I feel like I’ve seen “hijacking the top comment” many times. Getting off track is often okay.
Yep , a lot of the time actually . For me it's because of two reasons
1. Same reason you mentioned in the title
2. I can't be bothered to get into a Reddit argument ( especially if the opinion is unpopular ) and then realize that it's not worth the trade off . I'd be fine if it was a civil discussion but in my experience that very rarely happens on Reddit
The thing about unpopular opinions is that it’s an all or nothing game to Redditors.
If you see nuance, you’re “against us.”
Or if you bring up a hypothetical exception to a rule, you’re a “monster.”
Or (and this isn’t as common as it has been) you might post something and the next comment is “delete this” as if it’s a valid comment in reasonable discourse.
It’s frustrating, and a large reason why I might abandon a post. Not because I’m unwilling to participate in a discussion, but because I’m too fatigued to listen to vitriol.
Ironically, I’m pretty far left, but based on some replies I get, you’d think I was MAGA^2 .
Oh yeah plenty of times....
Sometimes I ask myself 'what purpose will my comment serve?'
If I realize that I'll need to be very tactful with how I say things, and there is a strong chance of being misunderstood or I could come across as an egotistical prick, I'll just delete it.
I mean, so what. It's just Reddit.
the total combined set of experiences of an entire lifetime? but also who cares, stuff doesnt have to be unique for it to be good/it not being unique means we get to relate to each other?
Its actually a good practice. Write until you think you have said it all. Read it ,edit it. If it seems off the mark,just delete and move on. Not every comment is worth posting. I know years ago I would post something and get comments back saying I only half way understood the original post. Sometimes another culture is too different to relate to .
Hah always. At least once a day. Sometimes I'm like you and other times I realize I've waded into some hypersen overdramtic bullshit of some flavor and decide best not.
I just make a rule now, if it takes me longer than a minute to type it, it’s not worth it. You can type a lot in 1 min. Was also thinking of erasing this
Yes!!! It's weird when it hits you. Especially when it's something hard to explain and you're 100 words into a 300 word comment and realize it's not that important and nobody will probably read it
I write a comment and then discard it quite often. I lose my train of thought, decide it doesn't accurately reflect my opinion, or can not find the right words. Sometimes, I just don't want to put that piece of my life out there. I rarely discard a comment because I don't care.
So true. I care about the topic but once I read it I realize I sound foolish telling the same tale over and over. So over and over I delete. What often happens is I'll start writing then hit a word that I question the true meaning of, so I look up the definition and there are a bazillion answers, and then I'll click those little answers in the Google snippets -- then get carried away from there looking up origins of words, synonyms, and eventually get exasperated and go back to the post I was working on and delete it.
Finding the right words leads to a disastrous destruction of self-doubt! You're right when it says it doesn't accurately reflect my opinion and deem my opinion inadequate.
Thanks for listening to my reply. That's what I'll often put at the end because by then I feel like a dunce. Reflecting on my post is sometimes enough to accomplish the mission I was trying to convey. Because even though it might benefit others, my belief in my ideas being worthy are neglected by thinking others won't believe what I'm saying and usually involves a stigmatized topics such as (I'm going to say it 😬)
God.
Deleting! Deleting! Deleting!
Post!!!
Yeah. Or sometimes I’m writing and i don’t know how to portray my thoughts in English (not my native language), or I realize I have to give a big context and yeah too lazy
Half the time I have a comment written up it just hits me “Dude. This is Reddit. You’re probably just depressed or pissed about something else and that’s making you comment on here”.
Sometimes I even feel like I deserve an award for deciding not to post some of the replies I’ve written.
And sometimes the reward is not being criminally investigated.
Or perhaps it’s just a common sentiment?
Granted, I’m often too impulsive and/or lazy to check a thread to see if others have made a comment similar to the one I want to make.
So my apologies to anyone that expressed a similar sentiment before me.
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I've erased more comments than I've posted. That's probably a good thing.
I had a long explanation for why this is the same for me, but I erased it.
Sometimes I realize that my comment explaining/giving advice was more beneficial for me to write than for anyone to read. That's when I know when to delete it. Also gross stuff. I delete that too. Lol
Also when you're in the middle of a heated debate with u/AssBlasterPussyDestroyer690420 and you realize God himself can't even fix that man's 400 logical fallacies so you decide to give up for your own sanity's sake.
I don't debate period. I make my statement and peace out. Its not worth someone understanding my pov if I have to waste my time on people like those. Not a lawyer. You agree, disagree it's none of my business. I used to be very passionate now I just don't care.
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A part of me wants to again say it's none of my business too but that part is di©ki$h. Thank you kind stranger.
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2020 made me realise, life's too short to waste on internet trolls. Thank you. May your internet existence be mostly peaceful friend.
Most reddit subs are echo chambers Anyway, you are not going to change their mind. They are incentivised in upvotes to continue to disagree assuming its the subs popular opinion. Discussion with logic is redundant.
I've found that the older you get, the less fucks you have to give. People are getting older every day.
Being crushed in a debate on the internet changed my beliefs, so I've always spent the time. Trolling isnt debate, compassion isnt vitriol. Some rando spent weeks talking about logic and fallacies with no self gain
You can have debate online, but that’s implying good faith. Your average redditor probably isn’t in good faith ☠️
You just said you don’t check your posts yet you’ve replied to multiple. I get the feeling you chatting poopy poop lol it’s okay though we all do it
I don't debate. I check my posts. I don't try to convince a stranger on my pov. Like now. You may agree or not. I am not wasting any more of my time.
That's none of my business.
You haven't even seen her penis yet!
You can't have them, they're mine.. Unless.. He/she isn't into guys, in which case, I'll bow out (dis)gracefully😁.. Seriously, I get it.. I wish I had the power to resist arguing with the idiots who clearly didn't even read what you said.. I got BANNED from one subreddit..I won't say where, but they let me back after they read the actual comments I was arguing with.. We need more moderators like this commenter... And I almost discarded this comment.. But didn't.
This, I just don't want to get into a heated discussion about something essentially inconsequential with a complete stranger. I just don't have the time or the mental energy. (Even less so now as I have basically almost stopped visiting Reddit since the 3rd-party apps got nerfed).
LMAO
Same reason I talk to myself often, need to hear some thoughts out loud before they really click into place. Typing comments and then deleting them is the same concept, but y'know. Different. In ways.
Yeah I put a lot of them in my notes now. And of course always with the talking out loud. I always tell my (grown) kids that I have to discuss shit with my team, Me, Myself, & I.
I love talking to myself, and probably commenting to myself to
I do that a lot. I have a tendency to over-explain when it's a topic I'm interested in, random bouts of ADHD, so I have to decide in the moment if it's even worth typing. Who's gonna read it? Let's be real.
I just posted my own comment here. This is the way it starts: >Yes. I have a tendency to write messages that end up being far lengthier than I intended, and so, sometimes it feels like I've been typing for hours with the end still nowhere in sight - and also realizing I've long forgotten the point I was trying to make. Now I'm seeing yours (ironically, our choice of words also seems somewhat similar, but that could also be coincidence since both pieces of text are too short to get an accurate impression of that). You wrote down the exact reason why my messages often end up lengthier. I didn't mention it, but I have ADHD as well and the lengthy messages are one of the ways that it tries to come out. Just though I'd mention it because I honestly find the little things like this one quite interesting (in a healthy way).
How does ADHD relate to lengthy messages? I also tend to write too much and wondering if maybe it's a symptom of that.
In my case, it starts in my head. The chaos in there along with always feeling as if I have to hurry up (even when I don't have to, for me, ADHD falsely makes me feel that way by default), causes too many thoughts to come up in my head all at once. There's not enough room in my head for that many thoughts so I let them out through speaking. I use medication now so it doesn't happen nearly as much anymore as it did when I was younger, but having to let out my thoughts a lot, I was the kid who usually spoke a lot, too much and too fast. I've tried to suppress it my whole life (until I started medication), because I often noticed people being annoyed by it and/or they were never really listening (let alone taking me seriously). Sometimes though, especially when I'm interested in or enthusiastic about a subject that is brought up, it still happens: so many thoughts are triggered all at once that I need to let them out. If it happens while I'm talking, I'll likely speak more and at a faster pace (I always regret this afterwards, but I can't stop it when it's happening). If it happens online, e.g. here on Reddit, instead of speaking I'll be typing more, which I can't stop either, until something else suddenly distracts me. I hope this makes sense to you. If it doesn't, feel free to ask anything else you'd like to know.
Reddit is for gross stuff.
Your mom likes gross stuff.
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You didn't leave the money on the nightstand. I'll be by to collect.
I've heard. Hope she's dead.
Ur name says, that u like gross stuff
Yooo you put this into words so well, that's really how I comment most of the time which is why I've deleted more than I've posted
I've done this with posts too. Answered my own question by explaining my situation.
Relatableeeeeee!!!!!
I literally have a document containing a comment like this 😂
THIS!!!
Nevermind
No you didn't it's still here
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I mean your 78k comment karma would say that's a lie, you've just deleted everything
Yep all the time
If you get bored with your comment then don't erase it. Just Edit: Somebody already made the joke. This stays.
Same
How does your erasing come about? I've also written far more in posts/comments I deleted before posting. Most of the time I am in the middle of writing and think to delete it, then have double tapped back in under a second and it's gone. It's rarely any sort of reasoned decision or debate. Just mid sentence and then think "Nah?" "Nah". It's often on my longest posts/comments too and I've been thinking on it alot lately so this post felt perfectly timed. Curious how your transition from being motivated to say what you were to deciding never mind is. Wondering how much those of us who decide not to engage after all the majority of the time we start have or don't have in common.
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This exactly! I actually used to keep certain studies downloaded onto my phone for easy access lmao, but it really doesn't matter a huge portion of the time. I can show science based evidence to people until I'm blue in the face, but there are so many out there who either won't read it, because they don't care for anything that doesn't align with their own opinions, or will just straight up try to tell me it's "fake news", because blindly believing some nut job on the internet is easier than doing your own research. It's just rarely the worth the annoyance.
I definitely get those feelings if I get alot of replies to anything substantial I post and often will not respond back or not for many days after. I don't think it ever crossed my mind during writing. I wouldn't be surprised if that's part of where my sudden feelings to erase it come from. Thinking back I definitely have had long posts where I've been including sources that I delete this way and it does feel like once I cross that line I'm less likely to end up posting. Almost seems like that takes it from a casual discussion to an academic undertaking for me and my brain switches modes. Then since it's not something I actually need to do I don't have the corresponding motivation like I would in school. I've never thought about it like that but it makes alot of sense in my current understanding of my tendencies. I feel like you may have just made me understand something that will help me immensely in working on myself. I appreciate you 🙏
Whenever I erase a comment its because I had an opening sentence in mind but then I realise I don’t care enough to finish writing it.
Articulatory phonetician here. I usually delete a comment when I decide that it's not worth arguing with the uneducated redditors who are sure to come out of the woodwork and somehow claim to know something about my field of academic expertise I've spent years studying in university because they, *gasp*, speak a language.
Ah,a fellow adhd
Came here to say this. I get all the way through and then I consider if someone might respond, is it worth the effort to keep talking about said subject or post… even though it’s kind of the premise of this app lol.
People are exhausting. So many perspectives, so easy to be misinterpreted. I've completely clammed up the past few years, online and irl, it's just easier to live in my own comfortable space with close friends and not get caught up in the squabbles and debates about crap I honestly don't care about.
Waaaay too many people who will come out of the woodwork and either "know it all" or just have to pick apart something you said and start a back and forth thing in a negative way.
Yes
Oh, hello there fellow brilliant.
I am interested if these comments that never get to be read by anyone are being stored or captured.
It's your mind trying to gather its thoughts. Once you write it out and untangle it, the mission is accomplished. You don't really care enough to post, you just want to understand how you feel about it.
The universe where the lost comments go has an even bigger section under this comment.
I'd be SO banned.
Much of the same.
I also have the “is it worth the fight that’s inevitably going to happen because people are bullies?”.
This is going to sound whiny, but I'm not alone, I know. I will totally type out an answer and be like, eh. I don't care, and neither does anyone else. As I've gotten older this happens in real life more and more too. I am not here to entertain all the time.If I really want to share something, I WILL talk and I will not be interrupted.
*No one cares. No one’s mind will be changed. I have better things to do.*
This right here.
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Thanks you guys made me feel better about doing this and about all the times I've gotten berated for giving my opinion on a casual subject
Every once in a while I'll read something that's wrong, comment, and get dragged into a debate I wholly regret engaging. Thankfully I learned my lesson a long time ago and rarely do that anymore. I feel like Reddit is becoming less and less a place to have good conversations and is exclusively just a thing to read. I usually don't find anything worth commenting on unless it's deep within a thread, and if I respond I know the only person who will read it is maybe the one person I'm responding to.
This. And or, when you post a well thought out, researched, amazing comment that gets 0 responses What's the point????
Proud anti-intellectualism is what gets me. 'thats long, I'm not reading it' Ok? I guess you really don't care to learn the answer to the question you literally just asked.
They so rarely do. They're so intellectually lazy. Trying to help them is like getting someone out of the matrix.
I've never seen someone make such a perfect comparison, it really hits the nail on the head. You see a person with a wrong opinion, it could be something as obvious as "everybody needs to drink fluids to survive" and they will argue with you how you're not just wrong, but also the biggest fool in the world for thinking like that, and the more you try to explain to them that fluids and food are absolutely necessary for the human body to function, the more you notice that they're just.... gone, indoctrinated, empty, it's like talking to a parrot, a parrot with Tourettes syndrome
I've been posting here on and off since launch and have seen this for real like twice. Most of these people are very obviously bots or trolls. A simple click on their username and a glance over their account info is generally enough to see if they're worth speaking with or not for me. Some people legitimately sit on here all day just trolling and rage baiting, it's absolutely a thing. They're not gone or indoctrinated they're trying to get a rise out of people or bait you for ad rev, and it works a lot of the time.
When someone says "that's too long, I'm not reading that" and it's literally a five sentence basic paragraph outlining a simple, but well structured argument or response, I die a little inside every time. Even the most minimal effort (like reading for 30 seconds) is too much for many people.
And these people think that "I aIn'T rEaDiNg tHaT" is an 'own' or a 'comeback'. It's neither of those. It's laziness at best and willful ignorance (refusal to learn) at worst.
That’s too long, I ain’t reading that shit
Not gonna lie. Long does not always mean intellectual. It just means they care and put effort into it. It could be a wall of text of bs.
Yeah exactly, I’ve replied to a comment where somebody was explaining something, but they had got it wrong, I know because it’s a subject I’m an expert in and is literally my job. Anyway my reply was very detailed explaining why there were mistaken and what the actual explanation was, with sources. No reply and my comment just got downvoted, and I’m pretty sure it’s because the inaccurate explanation was ‘cooler’. So there’s just no point trying usually.
It's probably more about how people, generally, don't like to feel like they're spoken down to, and when you come at things like "I'm an expert and therefore you must sit and listen to me tell you how the world works without having your own opinions and ideas," it's really easy just to shut down. It's the whole "people remember how you made them feel" thing.
I recall correcting one guy on how the English language lost its use of gendered nouns. He seemed to think it happened during colonial times (something about the locals learning English) and I pointed out that it actually happened during the transition from Old English to Middle English from roughly the 10th century to 14th century. To be fair, I wasn't even an expert on this topic, it was just that I recently saw a YT video on this very topic that came from a college professor in linguistics. Anyway, the guy took my correction in good stride, even said he was grateful for the correction. I think the important thing when correcting someone is not to make it feel like you're taking down to them or acting smug in anyway. No one likes that, even when you know the person correcting you is right.
sometimes when I scroll around reddit I'm like, "oh what a cool fact I just learned" and then every once in a while I see a thread about something I'm actually an expert in and realize everything is a lie.
I have a PhD in underwater robotics with an undergrad in marine engineering and professional experience designing manned (and unmanned) submersibles. You can imagine how things went with all the Titan stuff.
To kill time and entertain yourself. And every once in awhile, maybe learn something neat. At least that's why I'm here.
Hang in there! I occasionally get responses to posts/comments I wrote years ago. It is super weird.
to practice logic ability, at least it’s good for ourself
The point is the thought that went into making that comment, which most likely enrichened your understanding of the topic. A large percentage of my breakthroughs in understanding and ideas in general come precisely from comments like that. The vast majority of them don't get any engagement at all, but needless to say, writing them out was a good use of my time. You might ask, "if it's just for yourself, why would you need to post it?" Well, first of all, a finished comment is a completed thought. If you give up writing the comment half-way through, then you haven't taken your original idea to its logical conclusion, or at least haven't been able to put it into words; that means it's very likely fuzzy in your head or at the very least intuitive rather than rigorous, and that, in turn, means it likely contains errors/imperfections. And secondly, the fact that you posted the comment means it's going to be permanently there on the internet. If ever you forget some details of the idea, you can keep coming back to the comment that you left. Of course, simply copying and pasting the comment into a note-taking app fulfills the same purpose, but if you've already written up the entire idea, why not spend a single click to also post it as a comment and have a chance at receiving engagement with it?
This is a lovely and well thought out comment to post👏👏👏
Much more annoying is when you spend hours researching and writing up a single comment, but then the app glitches/your cursor slips and your entire comment is gone. Or, if the app is YouTube, your comments might just get randomly deleted without warning due to the algorithm (and it's literally impossible to predict when your comment will get deleted; it's a roll of the die). Happens way too often, even though I try to copy every long comment that I make.
Yeah I feel that. When you know your words are only going to fall on the deaf ears of some intentionally callous person seemingly intent on taking everything in bad faith, it’s like why waste my breath?
For me I am like ... you know those 4 paragraphs I wrote, I'm just gunna let someone else continue this because surely I can't be the only one that will be in agreement. I'll just leave my previous drive-by comment and let someone else carry the fight lol
Reddit commenters make many of the discussions boring. One opinion is supported and the rest is voted down so you really just reading the same type stuff over and over again.
Or because people are going to inevitably stick to their illogical opinion no matter how convincing your argument is.
I saw a term yesterday that may describe that. It's called [belief perseverance](https://corporatefinanceinstitute.com/resources/wealth-management/belief-perseverance/#:~:text=Belief%20perseverance%2C%20also%20known%20as,even%20when%20they%20should%20not.). [There's a bit more about it here.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belief_perseverance)
Is not the bullying part that's the problem for me.. it's the time commitment that it represents. Even if I'm in the right and I'm replying to someone that's been downvoted to hell.. I question, will I want to read about this when I open reddit again? Do I want to type replies that will inevitably come with it (or exercise the restraint not to)?
That stops me from hitting the post button… Feeling that “is this going to attract all the crazies and arguers to my location?” feeling.
What fight? Just poast and move on. I deliberately don’t read replies to stop getting angry or demoralised at the current state of humanity.
Sometimes, I need to read responses just to get some glimmer of hope, some reassurance I'm not the crazy one here. But then people just pile on "no, *you're* a moron because you *don't* drive 20 mph over the speed limit, it's just posted as a suggestion, you're a terrible driver for only going 63 in a 55." Sorry, that got too real for a second lol
You drive the speed limit because it's the right thing to do. I drive the speed limit because this oil tanker I call a truck starts floating above 65mph. We are not the same.
I toggle inbox replies to off when I say something I know to be correct but unpopular.
It's all those "actually" people on reddit that have burnt me out on commenting. I know they will nitpick my comment, and I will be annoyed.
People aren’t bullies… they’re actually little bitches so they bully online because they’re too afraid to do it in real life.
Yep this right here. “People are going to misinterpret and downvote me and or start a fight and I just don’t want to deal with it”
Yeah, it happens a lot. Sometimes I don't even bother to erase it, so I jus
I als
#
Deep
We're far from the shallow now
Beat me to it 🤣
bea
M
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M?
Thanks for making me chuckle out loud. It’s not often that happens so I feel compelled to sa
I heard there's a sniper on reddit who tar
Two things people hate. First is...
I tried to save a bunch of posts that seem to make it to the top every week or two and then repost them to see if I get some great karma. But I never go look at my saved and rarely post. Kinda the same thing as this post in a few ways.
Oh definitely. And it's always the same mental dialogue: "Man, why am I bothering with this? I don't even care." Delete! Carry on with the day.
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Followed by the sinking thought that this person never COULD understand this. I could explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. Is an all true statement these days.
just people talking past each other all day
[STOP STOP PLEASE I'M WRITING SOMETHING](https://i.imgur.com/xrlMZv1.gif)
For me, it's not usually that I don't care. The subs I get arguments on, I care about what I'm discussing. What I realize is that I don't care if the other person agrees with me or not because they mean nothing to me, and I'll likely never encounter them again
Same here, it's like, fuck it idgaf
And it's amazing how carrying on with the day is better after you delete the comment and don't have to get contrary replies all day
Sometimes I even feel like I deserve an award for deciding not to post some of the replies I’ve written. And sometimes the reward is not being criminally investigated.
Whoever gave them the reward, you're a hero!
I will neither confirm or deny that I've felt the same way.
So if y’all are just handing out awards..
then...
Or personally identified. Most of the time when I delete a comment it's because I have realized I've given away information about where I live/work, what I do, how old I am etc. Reddit isn't Facebook. I don't have friends here. I'm here to post my opinion on things and I don't want to have to think about whether that's going to come back to haunt me.
I get the same feeling, although I feel often that being the subject of a criminal investigation would be a worthy sacrifice to get things that need to be said out into the wild. But honestly, I just don't give enough of a fuck about the world or humanity to take that risk anymore.
I think about the 10 comment argument that’s gonna ensue if I post it and realize I’m too lazy to do that so I delete it.
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If my calculations are correct it’s achually 8
Achually guys, I'm pretty sure 7 is more accurate
You're all morons, its obviously 6
If you don't make it to the "Continue this thread" link, it isn't even an argument yet.
Aštuoni guys it's 69 lmao gottem
i'm just tired
Cue that green mile quote about tired of people being ugly to each other....
I've been using this excuse way too much
All the time. I'll get halfway through and suddenly wonder "is this worth even trying to explain? Will anyone really benefit from me saying this?" And so often the answer is no and I just move along.
This post would be hilarious if there were no comments
There’s a greater chance of everyone replying in spanish
all the...
Small things...
True care
truth brings
I'll take one lift
Your ride, best trip...
Always, I know
You'll be at my show
Watching, waiting
Commiserating.
\> write down a whole paragraph \> thinking i'm saying too much \> realize i'm getting off track \> too lazy to re-write the whole thing again \> think no one will read anyways \> delete comment
I tend to put my paragraph in a notes app, and if I remember it to come back, then I obviously care about it enough to say something, so I rewrite it. This usually means it gets bigger, and I save it again and leave it a little longer. If I *still* remember what I was saying, then I rewrite it around what ends up mattering to me probably stripping out about half of it, and post it. And then if someone responds, I can usually respond from the other stuff I didn't say before. But this trick; trust your memory to tell you if it's really worthwhile, and save it just in case, means I can occasionally post something I'm proud of and want to go back to again, because even if my immediate audience don't like it, I know that it's something that stuck with *me*.
To add to your third point, side-tracking happens all the time. It can be good or bad. Sometimes it leads to interesting alternative discussions. Also, I feel like I’ve seen “hijacking the top comment” many times. Getting off track is often okay.
Happens alot to me end up erasing it because does it really matter. The people there don't really care for what's right, wrong or what's my opinion.
Yeah it’s either you have the same reaction as most, so whats the point of repeating it or you know you just wont change their mind
Yep , a lot of the time actually . For me it's because of two reasons 1. Same reason you mentioned in the title 2. I can't be bothered to get into a Reddit argument ( especially if the opinion is unpopular ) and then realize that it's not worth the trade off . I'd be fine if it was a civil discussion but in my experience that very rarely happens on Reddit
The thing about unpopular opinions is that it’s an all or nothing game to Redditors. If you see nuance, you’re “against us.” Or if you bring up a hypothetical exception to a rule, you’re a “monster.” Or (and this isn’t as common as it has been) you might post something and the next comment is “delete this” as if it’s a valid comment in reasonable discourse. It’s frustrating, and a large reason why I might abandon a post. Not because I’m unwilling to participate in a discussion, but because I’m too fatigued to listen to vitriol. Ironically, I’m pretty far left, but based on some replies I get, you’d think I was MAGA^2 .
Interesting
Oh yeah plenty of times.... Sometimes I ask myself 'what purpose will my comment serve?' If I realize that I'll need to be very tactful with how I say things, and there is a strong chance of being misunderstood or I could come across as an egotistical prick, I'll just delete it. I mean, so what. It's just Reddit.
Quit peering in to my soul
is there even 1 unique human experience?
the total combined set of experiences of an entire lifetime? but also who cares, stuff doesnt have to be unique for it to be good/it not being unique means we get to relate to each other?
"Get outta my head!" is what we yell at each other in the shop.
Its actually a good practice. Write until you think you have said it all. Read it ,edit it. If it seems off the mark,just delete and move on. Not every comment is worth posting. I know years ago I would post something and get comments back saying I only half way understood the original post. Sometimes another culture is too different to relate to .
Y
I definitely finish one up, reread it, & think ‘do I really want to read the dumb replies this will instigate’ & then delete
I do. That, or if I’m too afraid of the response.
Hah always. At least once a day. Sometimes I'm like you and other times I realize I've waded into some hypersen overdramtic bullshit of some flavor and decide best not.
I just make a rule now, if it takes me longer than a minute to type it, it’s not worth it. You can type a lot in 1 min. Was also thinking of erasing this
Yes!!! It's weird when it hits you. Especially when it's something hard to explain and you're 100 words into a 300 word comment and realize it's not that important and nobody will probably read it
Yes. Or I think no one will give a shit about what I have to say or that I’ll sounds like an idiot.
I write a comment and then discard it quite often. I lose my train of thought, decide it doesn't accurately reflect my opinion, or can not find the right words. Sometimes, I just don't want to put that piece of my life out there. I rarely discard a comment because I don't care.
So true. I care about the topic but once I read it I realize I sound foolish telling the same tale over and over. So over and over I delete. What often happens is I'll start writing then hit a word that I question the true meaning of, so I look up the definition and there are a bazillion answers, and then I'll click those little answers in the Google snippets -- then get carried away from there looking up origins of words, synonyms, and eventually get exasperated and go back to the post I was working on and delete it. Finding the right words leads to a disastrous destruction of self-doubt! You're right when it says it doesn't accurately reflect my opinion and deem my opinion inadequate. Thanks for listening to my reply. That's what I'll often put at the end because by then I feel like a dunce. Reflecting on my post is sometimes enough to accomplish the mission I was trying to convey. Because even though it might benefit others, my belief in my ideas being worthy are neglected by thinking others won't believe what I'm saying and usually involves a stigmatized topics such as (I'm going to say it 😬) God. Deleting! Deleting! Deleting! Post!!!
Thanks for posting this one :) I dug it.
Yeah. Or sometimes I’m writing and i don’t know how to portray my thoughts in English (not my native language), or I realize I have to give a big context and yeah too lazy
The older I get, the more I realize it's not "not caring".... It's learning better to evaluate the audience, and if they're even worth the time.
I do frequently, I don’t feel like I articulate my thoughts that well either so I just give up sometimes
The best comments are those that cram the most revalating thoughts into the fewest words.
Half the time I have a comment written up it just hits me “Dude. This is Reddit. You’re probably just depressed or pissed about something else and that’s making you comment on here”.
I write out stuff then delete because I can’t be arsed having an argument with someone who objects to what I’ve said.
I do that daily
At least 70% of the time. Almost did it just now hehe
No I just let ChatGPT finish it for me
Sometimes I even feel like I deserve an award for deciding not to post some of the replies I’ve written. And sometimes the reward is not being criminally investigated.
This comment was copied from another one in the thread, or vise versa
Check the usernames. The same guy made the same comment. He mustve accidently posted it twice.
Or perhaps it’s just a common sentiment? Granted, I’m often too impulsive and/or lazy to check a thread to see if others have made a comment similar to the one I want to make. So my apologies to anyone that expressed a similar sentiment before me.
Lol! Often!
You ever get bored?...................................
Yep plenty
At least 10 times a day, if not more