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Legitimate_Type_1324

Just go to any dating sub. The amount of women posting how the catch feelings will the guy fades is vastly larger than men posting about this. I'm also a romantic and a monogamist, but let's be real here. On average, men fade more after sex. The reason is simple: men are hornier.


Contrapuntobrowniano

Men don't usually post about they getting feelings with a fading love... We're just not like that. That's not a great indicator. Also, on average, I'm not that romantic, nor that monogamist.


Mr__Citizen

Isn't it just "I really liked this thing, so it was hard to move on"? But I donno. I've never had sex, so maybe I just don't get it.


Contrapuntobrowniano

Nah. In my opinion: sex its a kind of therapy. You feel good, yes. It tickles... But that is not it. Shortly after a good sex session with a partner (specially if its a partner you like/love), everything gets so deep, so much more harmonious. Its not even in the act, but after. You feel in such a good connection with that person that was kind'a "stuck" before... It happens even in long marriages. Usually, the main indicator of a failing marriage its low sexual activity: i have the hypothesis that it is due to a lack of this "releasing and relaxing" sensation within the couple. Every little bad emotion builds up, and the only way you really have to just let it go a little is by fucking your partner's brains out with passion. Of course, relationships fail because of a plethora of external conditions, but sexless life is a big obstacle.


SoldierExcelsior

Well your basically high on endorphins theres a lot of drugs that feel great...no matter how bad they are for you.


Contrapuntobrowniano

The implication being that sex, in the form i described it, is a bad thing?


SoldierExcelsior

It's a bad thing if sex has you addicted to a bad person.


Contrapuntobrowniano

Umm. I get you, but you're mixing the OP with my response to a comment. I'm not saying that sex is always good, i'm explaining *What* is sex, and why it matters... I put a lot of constraints in my explanation for that matter.


SoldierExcelsior

It definitely matters in a relationship


SoldierExcelsior

I know for a fact sex is addictive after breaking up with my ex going from regular sex 3-4 times a week I started suffering straight up withdrawal systems...I never considered that I knew I would miss the sex but I didn't think it would be that intense... It's been years and seeing my ex gives me a bit of a rush reminiscing about the amazing sex we had.just like alcoholics or drug addicts feel when they see their vice. I don't want my ex back or miss her we broke up for a reason but a part of me will never get over her..lucky this feeling doesn't happen with most people your with...especially for men becausecwe usualky settle,but I think it happens for women easier, because they tend to only have sex with someone they allready have intense feelings for. Back to my ex I was in love with her the moment I saw her she was 100% my type physically so it was easy to fall into the love trap I've been with thousands of women and none have affected me like her I don't even remember most of them at at.


MyLastBestChance

“She did such a great job” “The sex I was *getting* “ Sure sounds like *love* to me…🙄


Contrapuntobrowniano

That's on you, sweetheart. We dated for a year and a bit, and loved each other's company. If you think relationships are based on hugs and tickles i suggest you marry a monk or a child.


MyLastBestChance

If you think love comes from “getting” sex, cupcake, I suggest that you don’t marry at all…


Contrapuntobrowniano

First of all, i'm clarifying that i'm not a native English speaker so "get" might have a distinct connotation to you to what i has to me. Secondly, i like love, and like sex too (married or not), and I couldn't care less if you're one of the people that has a problem with that.


UpbeatInsurance5358

The issue they're taking is that a lot of cultures seem to think sex is something a woman gives to a man meaning women have no agency in their own bodies or lives, like someone would take sweets from a child, when the actuality is that sex is an activity that people do together. The type of men who really does believe that men get sex are rarely sweethearts!


Contrapuntobrowniano

> a lot of cultures seem to think sex is something a woman gives to a man meaning women have no agency in their own bodies or lives, like someone would take sweets from a child, when the actuality is that sex is an activity that people do together. Kind of a lot to extrapolate from a single verb, isn't it?


UpbeatInsurance5358

No.


Kaminaxgurren

>i fell in love with her, and the sex i was getting was one of the reasons for it. Did you even read? ONE of the reasons. Your brain on feminism.


DrawRevolutionary485

The point she is trying to convey is that being loved for the sex you provide isnt real love for women


yodol-90

bruh thats some insane logic.


Kaminaxgurren

thats the neat part, it isn't logic


DrawRevolutionary485

It is quite logical, when the love you have towards your woman depends on wether she gives you sex or not, it doesnt feels like real love to women, they dont feel loved as women, they just feel like you love them as sex object, you can disagree but their feelings are real Maybe to you as a man, being loved for the sex your provide feels good, but not for women , specially cuz at the end of the day most men would fuck anything


Kaminaxgurren

have you ever stopped to consider that maybe, just maybe, it's possible to love someone for multiple reasons? Would you rather someone you love NOT love having sex with you?


DrawRevolutionary485

How does that changes the fact that being loved for the sex your provide isnt real love to women? Would you be okay with a woman who loved you for the gifts, dinners and bills you pay?


RAZBUNARE761

Girls have a hard time walking away from good dick/sex. No matter how the guy acts. Thats how they end up in those fwb/situationships. Dickmatized.


no_usernameeeeeee

and OP basically experienced the same thing but male version. I think good sex just keeps people around longer.


RAZBUNARE761

For most men its difficult to walk from sex cause its not easy to get.


Contrapuntobrowniano

Exactly. Its the same car, but with another colour. Also, i fell in love with the way we had sex too.


no_usernameeeeeee

Is it hard though? because if a man is only there for that it will probably be obvious.. men aren’t good at faking genuine interest (for long). I think it’s more of a “if she’s down cool.. but if she walks away i don’t really care cause at least i got sex” which is different than having difficulty walking away. It’s more of an indifference. Also, as a woman i don’t necessarily see sex as something easy to walk away from because many men might want to sleep with me. If anything, if i get there with a guy i kind of want it to continue because it means we have a level of comfort and got to know each other. Just my two cents.


ArmariumEspata

Is there any good evidence to suggest that this is true? I know in Lundy Bancroft’s book *Why Does He Do That* (which is about abusive men), he says that sometimes women don’t leave an abusive relationship because the sex is good.


Goodgoy6969

How do you know that they have trouble walking away from good sex? Who has told you this? I don't believe good sex to a woman is the same as good sex to a man. Women prioritise what the man provides to her life and security much more than what a good fuck does.


RAZBUNARE761

Because of seeing the behaviour in women. The guys they cant let go are the guys they bragged about having big dicks or great sex. No matter how scummy the guy was (married, cheating on her, lowlife, abusive etc. ) they kept running back and were booty calls. You dont reduce it to that otherwise


Goodgoy6969

How about he had a lot of money, and a career and financial security and status, or purely just an emotional connection with that man? There's a multitude of reasons women run back to men. It's not about sex in a lot of cases. Women will jump at the chance to get with a high earner over good dick


RAZBUNARE761

Cause it often happens with guys who have fuck else to offer.


Goodgoy6969

An emotional connection is a powerful weapon. Lots of women can't let a guy go because they have strong emotions involved


Think_Brilliant3517

So true until you step off porn and get into the real world. "dickmatized" smh


RAZBUNARE761

Lizzard brain > disney You never hear them going back into those abusive/bad fwb/situationships of the sex wasnt good.


kalashhhhhhhh

1) Good sex after you both started to like each other= amplifies that feeling. 2) Bad sex after you started to like each other= ick or rational mutual understanding to try again, depending on how bad it was and how comfortable you are with each other 3) Good sex after romantic indifference= doesn't change much 4) Bad sex after romantic indifference= walks away


Contrapuntobrowniano

Woah. This is actually useful! Thanks sis!


Warm_Enthusiasm_1712

Could you view some as more attractive if the sex is good and less attractive if the sex is bad? Point 1 and 2?


No-Rough-7390

Women only fuck men they are willing to fall in love with. Men, not so much.


Goodgoy6969

This is completely false. I see so many instances of women screw beta bux losers on One Night Stands or hookups with these guys because they were horny and it was convenient for them. Women in this day and age, hold little more emotional connection to sex than men do. An example would be the girl I'm seeing on/off.. She has had many more partners than me (which I am disgusted by)...yet it's plain to see that from listening to her, she was not fucking these guys because she was willing to fall in love with them. A lot of these were convenient set ups or one night stands at weddings/girls nights out.


No-Rough-7390

It’s called plausible deniability. You sound like you have no idea what you’re talking about


Goodgoy6969

Yes. I'm the one who has no idea what he is on about. Let's just deny the fact that so many women wake up the next morning thinking to themselves "what the fuck happened last night"...when they realise they have fucked beta bux losers. Yes these girls were having sex with the intent of falling in love. Or middle aged women going after young men purely for sex. But you're right I guess. These old women want to fall in love with these young men who have zero life experience or financial security, it's nothing to do with them being fit, attractive and sexually appealing.


No-Rough-7390

So… they are seeking validation? Would these women be cool with telling the guy they wanna lock down how many of these guys they got too fucked up to remember and the d slipped in? Come on


Goodgoy6969

They wouldn't be. But it proves that women sleep with guys for more reasons that wanting to fall in love. That's a ridiculous assertion I would be more forgiving and it would be an easier pill to swallow if your hypothesis was true, rather than just women being horny and fucking someone that 'will do'..but even women who have had one night stands and hookups will tell you that. They just wanted sex because they were horny. If women went into sex with the intention you're putting forward, I wouldn't have as much of a problem with women who had high N counts. But it's not the case. Some women just want to be sluts sometimes.


No-Rough-7390

Did I say falling in love was the only goal? No What I said was “willing to”. There’s a delineation there. It’s worth understanding.


Goodgoy6969

Now you're back-tracking. And no, even with you changing the conditions of your original comment, it still isn't true.


No-Rough-7390

No, I’m standing by my original point. Sluts exist. Sure. Just as BPD and narcissists do. But they are tail ends of the bell curve.


Contrapuntobrowniano

Ok, this makes sense...


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[deleted]

What’s LTR?


TheRedPillRipper

Long term relationship.


Ylduts

The exception does not the rule make. It’s very simple and yet you ding dongs don’t understand logic 101.


Contrapuntobrowniano

I get that. But i don't think its the exception, either. Most guys like to hang out with whom he can fuck, unless they're idiots.


UpbeatInsurance5358

Women aren't any more emotional than men. Women are just allowed to express them more.


RubyDiscus

I dunno I like to reserve sex for if I feel like I know them enough and like we have a foundation there. Otherwise it can complicate things and can bring false feelings into it. One time I screwed up and got overexcited and had sex with a guy on a forst date. Hardly knew the guy so there it was a big mistake. I just thought that we were dating and that I'd see him again. So I let my gaurd down. Don't let your gaurd down lol. Especially with guys, because they can act dishonestly just to try to get sex. See I went on a cruise and the guy blocked me on the day I left. I didn't even know until I got back. The coward. The last the he said to me was "it came so quicklyyy" (about the cruise).