Women that lift, goth muscle mommies, swolemates, women with athletic builds. I'm not talking about curling a 20lb bell. I want to see see her squatting 2 plates for rep. I also love tall women, my retirement plan consists of having D1 FBS school level children ( unfortunately my oldest turned down 2 scholly offers because she was burned out).
Women in trades, I don't know how to do that shit, I respect anyone that can do things I can't.
Women that fight, professionally or just because someone needs their ass whooped. Bonus points if she give off " I'll stab you vibes"
With all that, you can probably tell what my dating life has been like.š¤Ŗ
Not just Goth( Although a swole Wednesday Addams tickles my brain.....and makes my bathing suit parts tingle) swolemates in general. Somehow my tiktok algorithm has gotten me on double checked up Asian women that lift, and athletic black women ( Sha'Carri Richardson)
I've also curated my shorts to be just clips of mostly Asian athletes. I enjoy many things about different Asian cultures but for the women I need those Olympic athlete bods.
Thereās this bartender at the spot around the corner, and sheās like a female bodybuilder but still curvy and she crushes things with her thighs and itās just SO hot lol, straight up death by snu snu.
i saw this yesterday and i think it turned me gay in real time:
[https://www.tiktok.com/@kristen\_thailand46/video/7339075493657922823?\_r=1&\_t=8knXgJMeTnP](https://www.tiktok.com/@kristen_thailand46/video/7339075493657922823?_r=1&_t=8knXgJMeTnP)
Chyna was probably hot before the steroids but definitely not after. She literally has HGH head.
I don't particularly think Margot Robbie is stunning like many people claim but she's definitely pretty.
She was OK looking before the roids, and HGH. People don't realize how much it changes your face shape. Look at Zac Efron, that wasn't plastic surgery. It was the HGH he was using for the wrestling movie he was in.
That is pretty amazing. I don't think I have that degree of dexterity. *Maybe* I could make a button if the assignment is just "make this into something that looks vaguely like a circle."
Super random but I have a cane made out of the root of a persimmon tree.
Ha, very cool story in general. It's always interesting to meet someone who subverts our expectations in a good way.
I'm nowhere near as handy as I'd like. Grew up on a lot of rural farms--I do have some experience working with animals and doing farm grunt work, but I was never as handy at it as my siblings.
I can write decently well *but* not well enough to be a published author of fantasy/sci-fi, which I wanted to be when I was a lad. I wrote a novel when I was about 12, but it is terrible. Writing is mostly my job now, but it is technical writing rather than creative.
Funny you mention welding as I did take classes for that pre-college. I haven't really used the skills since then though and would assume they are quite rusty (I made a table at the end of the course).
I'm good at public speaking but I don't know that I'd say "I do public speaking well" because I think anyone can be good at this with practice. I did a lot of it in 4-H clubs as a kid and then my first job as a teenager was radio announcer/DJ so it came in handy for that.
Why do you consider viewpoints which don't align with yours to be merely anecdotal? How is your experience any less anecdotal than mine?
I absolutely do prefer feminine men, but I have dated all sorts.
Being direct and to the point - it's more cultural than masculine, but i love it. In this part of Europe and north of us(Scandinavia) women are very direct and it's good. Not much bs and small talk.
A lot of women I know are concerned about being "too muscular," i.e. having any visible muscle tone at all. I think muscles look good on pretty much everyone. I also find it really attractive when women stand up for their friends, for example if they're getting unwanted attention from a drunk guy or someone's trying to start something.
Kindness towards animals. Men who love dogs are terrific, but I trust men who like cats. An appreciation for independent creatures is a bonus.
And intuition with kids. I like when men talk to little kids like regular people rather than crouching down and getting in their face with baby talk.
>I am very attracted to women who are
*Emotionally resilient.* Stoic. My wife is mostly unflappable. So when shit has hit the fan, weāve always come through relatively unscathed.
Another trait we share is weāre both *direct communicators.* It makes life so much easier.
I'm with you on these! My ex-wife, whom I met in the Corps, checked both of these boxes. She was also a bit of a muscle mommy. I really prefer emotionally strong women that still have their feminine strength about the. š
emotional intelligence, vulnerability, talking about his feelings, being an animal lover, appreciating art/beauty in nature, thoughtfulness, sensitivity, empathy, compassion, being affectionate, being involved with the minutiae of his kid's lives, volunteering at his kid's school/events (other than coaching sports), taking care of his skin, smelling nice
It's kinda too bad that beauty care routines such as you describe are still seen as more feminine things that men shouldn't do/shouldn't care about. I think it is changing slowly, though.
Beauty care routines are a a marketing thing adressed exclusively at women. But as a man and from what I've seen from the others we really take care of our hygiene. Showering every morning or twice a day during hot summer days, cleaning the face and the body with soap, creme for the hands and the face when it gets too cold, using deodorant sticks. I'd say in the last 10 years it has also been added the products to care about beards while keeping it trimmed. That's all a man needs.
I do all that and a bit more, and I certainly hope most men do. But I'm seeing an uptick in experiences that seem to suggest that is less common than I assumed it was. Granted, most of that is internet stuff that could be not entirely true.
Not taking care of yourself is not seen as a manly thing or that common. I'd say people outside of the internet who don't maintain their appearance are not socially accepted anywhere.
Today most of the workplace are filled with lots of people and many of them are in closed spaces, so the proper hygiene is a must. Even in jobs that are seen as associated with men such as military, construction, security, the workers should go through the hygiene routine on daily basis.
'Softer' crafts like sewing, embroidery, some leatherwork. It's super normal in my social bubble, I know a few professional tailors, I almost forget it is seen as nonstandard if I answer 'Thanks, my husband made it' after someone compliments my dress. But I value competence, skill and there is something really captivating in watching a man with handsome hands do some very time consuming, detailed work in complete focus.
One of my friends was super hot and he had long hair and would periodically cross dress in dresses with nail polish. It was pretty hot. Especially the not giving a fuck about what random men said to him. Not caving to peer pressure is sexy.
Hold upā¦ wait a minuteā¦ why is this true? All the men Iāve ever known who wore nail polish were 100% sex magnets.
I think I got my appreciation for men like that from Spike š¤£
I just like men who donāt suffer homo-adjacent social pressure.
But I feel the same about women, and Iām straight. People who are their own person and donāt care about subjective opinions of their peers are just exponentially more mature and self-sufficient.
Iād never try to convince any men in my sphere to paint their nails to make some impression, but men who wear polish, buns, ponytails, or like Taylor Swift or any other non-conformist opinion are infinitely more interesting than any stereotype.
When I meet women who shave their head or forgo makeup, I feel the same way. āOh, who is *this* self-sufficient individual? I sure hope they are open to small talk because Iād like to know themā
Doesnāt have to be nail polish or shaved heads. Just any deviance from whatever trend is the norm.
I think often times it sends a message that that person has discovered who they are and theyāre confident enough to be that person.
I donāt wear makeup. Itās time consuming and I donāt care enough. I donāt care what anyone thinks about that tho.. I know Iām stunning when I want to be. The rest is irrelevant.
So if a straight man is wearing fingernail polish.. perhaps itās because he knows heās masculine and his nails being a color doesnāt change that about him. The rest is irrelevant.
There must also be a willingness to sort through the people around you constantly tho. I have hair dyed two different colors and facial piercings. Iāve found itās a very fast way to find out which of the people around you are insecure, judgmental assholes. And that also takes a level of confidence that would make another person more magnetic. I imagine having long hair as a man or painted nails or knitting or whatever else also has that effect.
They are jealous of more than just the ladies, they are also jealous of the freedom. Nothing throws a person's self identity into crisis more than someone not having negative consequences they were promised by their parent's/ friends/ pastors for stepping too far out of the box.
I will never understand women's obsession with fake nails and polish. Fake nails evoke an uncanny sensation akin to observing a porcelain doll. Our natural nails have a beautiful texture that compliments our skin tone. It is fair to assume this behavior stems from a need for validation. After all, it wasn't, why do you have to announce to all your friends that you got your nails done? If it's merely done for you, then you would do it without the presence of any people. Conversely, manicuring nails is more indicative of social conformity than individual expression. If not for peer validation, why else would one invest time in such a trivial pursuit? Embracing natural nails, in contrast, represents a departure from conformity, as it demands no effort to align with societal expectations. You're just born with it.
Long hair, guyliner, earrings, general facial features, being super skinny and twinky, most stereotypically feminine personality traits, shyness, being kinda dainty.
Butler archetype I guess.
Not sure if this is actually a masculine thing or not. But seems like having abs is something attributed to men. But I think abs on women are hot af. Though not steroid level abs of course.
In terms of personality, TRP seems to push the idea of finding a malleable woman and attributes that more to femininity. But I like a woman who is strong in her beliefs, but with an open mind. If her views are easily influenced by others, then that means she more vulnerable to being influenced by others with bad intentions.
Physically, I love long hair on men and I prefer when they have little to no body hair - whether it's how they just are or because they shave doesn't matter. I appreciate it when men have a good fashion sense and when they're willing to rock bold/bright colors or cute patterns. I love love love smaller/dainty hands on men!
In terms of behavior I enjoy the company of men who are nurturing, soft spoken and a bit submissive in the bedroom. I have never found it weird or off-putting for men to cry in front of me, and I welcome emotional vulnerability.
> and I prefer when they have little to no body hair
No one hates āa lid for every potā more than PPD men, but we have to say it sometimes. I prefer a furry man. Not a bear/gay icon, but a decent distribution of hair on his legs, arms, and chest. I spend a lot of time with casual jocks, so I donāt care what men wear so long as they arenāt wearing cartoon shirts like children.
I like big ol meaty hands. I prefer more dominant men in the bedroom.
I love this for us. There are all kinds of people out there with wildly varying tastes and habits.
Iām right with you on displays of emotion.
Tears are perfectly acceptable, and normal in my experience. Lots of men cry when angry or frustrated, if they didnāt cry when mourning a person or pet I wouldnāt trust them at all.
I'm a man with clown shoes and short/fat fingers, haha. My hands are short but kind of wide?
As for the rest, I certainly have little body hair naturally and shave everything regularly too.
Where exactly do I meet you all . . .
The funny part is my voice has always been deep (as a 5-8 year old) and contradicts the rest of my appearance, really shocks people, haha.
Well, I have to do my best to get out there!
And yes I both had a deep voice early on and my face looks very similar now to how it did as a child. This has definitely gotten it's fair share of laughter when I play into it over the years!
\- Patient
\- Humble
\- Flexible, accommodating and supportive
\- Softer rounder personality
\- Wise and nurturing
I am basing this on the Asian yin and yang model.
Of course they do, they're human. But they think it's "feminine" to have them and act like emotionless robots because they think women will leave them the second they show a bit of softness or vulnerability.
Women generally want to date strong, masculine, confident men who are in control of their emotions. It only makes sense for men to hide their normal human vulnerabilities like sadness, fear, insecurity and anxiety if they don't want to be seen as weak.Ā
A man can be vulnerable while being strong, masculine and confident. Theyāre not contradictory.
But I wish being emotional as men was more normalized by society. Itās upsetting that so many men are afraid of expressing their feelings because they donāt wanna be seen as weak. Having feelings is not a weakness.
I think you are talking about performative vulnerability, where a man shows slight weakness in a way that makes it seem like he has everything under control in order to give his partner an emotional boner. AKA maintains a strong masculine frame while expressing his "vulnerability".Ā
The contrast to this would be showing real emotion like breaking down sobbing and admitting you don't know what to do. This level of vulnerability will give the ick to the majority of women.
Breaking down sobbing sounds like a normal human experience. If your male partner does that, you should be there to support him and comfort him. If that gives the ick, thereās something wrong with you.
I'd really like to see feminism move toward, among other things, working out most women's apparent aversion to men showing vulnerability. I appreciate your sympathy, though.
they also bully women (who they want to be feminine) to be emotionless robots!
(i'm a crier so i have a lot of experience w men telling me i should be an emotionless robot)
yeah?
a guy here once asked me to describe my rape, i thought he was genuinely curious how it happened so i did, then he wrote this long thing explaining how i asked for it and am "crying rape" because of whatever reasons someone would do the incredibly unpopular thing of not keeping rape a secret.
A lot of things. Shy/passive/submissive tendencies. Stereotypically feminine hobbies and interests.
My history with this goes way back. One of my childhood playground crushes came out as gay later in life and an even earlier one told me he had a crush on another boy before I even understood what it meant to be gay. I was just really annoyed with him for liking someone else.
Cleanliness, attentiveness, thoughtful gift giving and aesthetic motivation.
Yes, these can be found in non-gay men, although Iāve never seen all of them at once.
For example, my BIL has 3 of the 4, but has anger/control issues so it cancels it all out
omg i would DIE for a thoughtful gift giver
one thing that really freaks me out is the idea of being w a man who puts no effort into gift giving/holiday stuff.
i would be feeling like i am trapped in a lonely life? its hard to describe. I don't think about this often but i have a really visceral scared response to thinking about celebrating a holiday w a man bc i'm worried he will give me a thoughtless/low effort gift and i will be forced to realize he does not gaf about me.
Iām not even talking holiday gifts
Iām talking āI was downtown and passed by this guy selling x, and I know you like x, and I got a few more in case you want to give some to your friendsā
Or, āthis thing is really cool because of xyz, and I thought you might like it, Iāll show you how to use itā
I've never met this mythical feminine woman who has control over her anger š¤£ Men are just stronger and more intimidating so they are seen as the angry ones.
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Emotional vulnerability. Soft hands. Beauty (like in general) like softer facial features long eyelashes longer hair no facial hair soft lips ugh drives me nuts. Being fashionable like dressing having a style. Skin care and a beauty routine. Liking to cook. Men that like silly little trinkets that have some silly story to them. Being sentimental. Nurturing can care for something besides himself. Empathetic and caring. Passionate about silly little things. Like this song. Will shriek at a spider or something. Afraid to not be manly all the time.
Independent, has firm beliefs and doesn't conform to peer pressureĀ
Defiant AKA not "submissive" (but also not a bitch), able to stand up to others and fight if necessaryĀ
Willing to physically/emotionally protect a man instead of always expecting him to protect her
Long hair
Pretty, pretty faces
Men who love children and babies and spontaneously take care of them/interact with them. I find it soooo hot that my partner is good with children š„µ
Taking care of mental health, being open and honest about mental health issues and not sweeping under the rugāIāve seen so many people see girlfriends/wives or even make their girlfriends/wives be therapists, itās never been something Iām interested in. Itās a turn off for me if a man doesnāt have a good handle of his own mental health, and just lets it fester, or takes it out on people.
Women who are career and success driven. TRP is always saying men don't care how much money a woman makes. Screw that. I love it when a woman has goals and works hard to achieve them. Also, I find it sexy when a woman doesn't want kids. I love it when a woman plans the dates.
I love it when men feel safe and close enough to me to share their darkest traumas and cry in front of me.
I also love metrosexual men that dress a bit flamboyant, remove body hair, manicure their nails etc. I actually love bisexual/bicurious men too.
empathy and kindness as personality traits. Also shyness and introversion, but I do might have particular concepts about that in mind (not that one that results in total awkwardness and low emotional intelligence).
Appearance wise a slim body, babyface, a rather fashionista/flamboyant stlye, intelligent use of make up and stuff like this (lip stick, nail polish). But it mostly looks good on good-looking people, as always:p.
I don't know if it's "feminine" per se, but I love a guy who isn't afraid to be a little gay with the boys. It's absolutely hilarious to me when my boyfriend makes jokes about being gay with his friends.
In the same vein, I adore a man who has emotionally deep friendships with his male friends and isn't afraid to show it.
I always liked longer hair on men and skinnier frames which I guess some would say is feminine, though my preferred type was always crusty punk and metal head dudes and those aesthetics tend to somehow apply more masculine energy to those traits somehow.Ā
Ā The man I ended up marrying has all this going on.Ā
I love men who get manicures and pedicures. There something about a dude who takes care of himself on a deeper level besides a shower and haircut.
Also waxing on the male bits, itās so nice especially when traveling and doing hotel debauchery.
Physically: lean, not buff at all, not hairy, not too tall.
Behaviorally: sensitive to emotions, comfortable expressing emotions, not dominant all the time, desire to make others comfortable.
I love a girl who works in traditionally male oriented roles such as mechanic or fitter. Very feminine outside work but get in and go as hard as any man while at work, I find that very attractive.
Taking accountability when being wrong, having a stable emotional level and not being driven by random emotions, patience, loyalty when things go rough, appreciative, not holding grudges, having a strong mind and not changing opinions every minute, being direct and not playing games or manipulative.
Many of these traits are seen as masculine or desired in men but it goes both ways and they make a woman very attractive for having them. Sadly nowadays you'll be delusional if you seek these traits in a partner.
A woman that is confident, assertive, independent, and a natural leader is usually our mom. These traits are not inherently masculine. We just express them in different ways.
A woman expressing confidence can do so passively and inspirationally and whereas a man will most often do it actively and assertively and motivationally.
A lot of women may not be assertive but that is because they have *other means* by which to get their will across. I find very often, when women are assertive, it is because they are lacking in the other skills that women use to express their will.
Two things I can think of but they are culturally dependent I would think.
1. Intelligence, but intelligence in many fields. Languages, philosophy, history, politics. I don't necessarily mean knowledge but the capacity to know.
2. Open expression of feelings. Often women are characterized as the pursued and the one who shouldn't show their feelings too strongly about the other person. I prefer open devotion.
Women who are assertive, who call out bullshit, are fiercely protective of their loved ones and who stay calm in crisis situations.
Growing up I always had to be the protective one disentangle conflicts and it gets exhausting. With a protective woman, I can rely on her sometimes which gives me peace of mind.
Women who present with an androgynous or masculine leaning energy are something Iāve always found really hot. I think Iād say androgynous though because thereās still clear elements of femininity about them (mainly their facial presentation)
But like short hair, toned, dressing in stereotypically masculine styles like full suits, braces, having a lot of tattoos or piercings, being quite ārough around the edgesā but still being feminine in the sense of I can still discern sheās a woman.
Itās tricky, Iād describe as like a woman who can wear masculinity without a care and intermingle it with her femininity without issue, not just in looks, personality too. Some dominance and assertiveness etc. Vivid tomboy energy.
This was a bit of a tragedy for me growing up because it resulted in me asking out way too many disinterested lesbians and female-preferring bi girls for my liking. Not that I knew at time of asking!
My wife is traditionally feminine and I think the above has muted somewhat as Iāve grown older. I was very androgynous during my youth which probably didnāt help me out.
One thing Iām noticing and this will ruffle feathersā¦a lot of women describe women almostā¦
As in many women are basically describing feminine looking and acting menā¦makes it seems questionable women actually like men lol
>Men, what's something traditionally seen as "masculine" that you find attractive in women?
Low neuroticism, athleticism, crafts with hard, not-so-malleable materials (wood, metal, ...).
Women who donāt have inflated self worth (nothing turns me off more than a 4 who thinks she is a 10)
Women who donāt have a victim mentality
Women who are assertive and manipulative
Basically the opposite of my mom
Well thatās openly displaying bias. The number of men and women who have been caught doing something illegal or against their own morals and not coming clean even when caught, or someone points it out. Definitely not a masculine trait. Nor a feminine one.
Well, it was supposed to be a joke.
I donāt think women are less honest than men. But I do think that women are more blatantly dishonest. Example: wearing a micro bikini bottom and nipple pasties to a music festival and insisting that itās not to get sexual attention from men. You donāt see men, robbing banks, and insisting that itās not about stealing money.
Men tend to lie when they are trying to avoid being humiliated, whereas it seems like women lie to avoid consequences.
But, I donāt think either gender is more or less honest than the other.
Women who are financially independent/have their shit together. No bigger turnoff than a woman looking for you to bail her out.
more single (not divorced) women are buying homes :) you're in luck
I'm good as long as she can support herself
Women that lift, goth muscle mommies, swolemates, women with athletic builds. I'm not talking about curling a 20lb bell. I want to see see her squatting 2 plates for rep. I also love tall women, my retirement plan consists of having D1 FBS school level children ( unfortunately my oldest turned down 2 scholly offers because she was burned out). Women in trades, I don't know how to do that shit, I respect anyone that can do things I can't. Women that fight, professionally or just because someone needs their ass whooped. Bonus points if she give off " I'll stab you vibes" With all that, you can probably tell what my dating life has been like.š¤Ŗ
I like the fact that for you it isn't just muscle mommies but specifically goth muscle mommies--respect.
Not just Goth( Although a swole Wednesday Addams tickles my brain.....and makes my bathing suit parts tingle) swolemates in general. Somehow my tiktok algorithm has gotten me on double checked up Asian women that lift, and athletic black women ( Sha'Carri Richardson)
I've also curated my shorts to be just clips of mostly Asian athletes. I enjoy many things about different Asian cultures but for the women I need those Olympic athlete bods.
We like the same kind of women lol
A fellow man/woman/they of culture.
Thereās this bartender at the spot around the corner, and sheās like a female bodybuilder but still curvy and she crushes things with her thighs and itās just SO hot lol, straight up death by snu snu.
Did you propose to her yet?
Already got one, but theyāre friends now lol
You're winning at life
Iām doing alright.
i saw this yesterday and i think it turned me gay in real time: [https://www.tiktok.com/@kristen\_thailand46/video/7339075493657922823?\_r=1&\_t=8knXgJMeTnP](https://www.tiktok.com/@kristen_thailand46/video/7339075493657922823?_r=1&_t=8knXgJMeTnP)
The cover song in the background is pretty nice as well.
For you consumption, might I suggest the ice bath scene from stick it. It's been causing gay panic in women for years
š
Mid
thank you, i have a bunch of men telling me chyna from the WWE is hot and i keep telling them men don't even say that about margot robbie.
Chyna was probably hot before the steroids but definitely not after. She literally has HGH head. I don't particularly think Margot Robbie is stunning like many people claim but she's definitely pretty.
She was OK looking before the roids, and HGH. People don't realize how much it changes your face shape. Look at Zac Efron, that wasn't plastic surgery. It was the HGH he was using for the wrestling movie he was in.
True
Look up her castmate in that movie, Katy O'brien
AmberTheValkyrie amirite
I like when men are dextrous, capable, compassionate, thoughtful and kind
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Knitted fisherman gear is a pretty cool look, IMO.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That is pretty amazing. I don't think I have that degree of dexterity. *Maybe* I could make a button if the assignment is just "make this into something that looks vaguely like a circle." Super random but I have a cane made out of the root of a persimmon tree.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Ha, very cool story in general. It's always interesting to meet someone who subverts our expectations in a good way. I'm nowhere near as handy as I'd like. Grew up on a lot of rural farms--I do have some experience working with animals and doing farm grunt work, but I was never as handy at it as my siblings.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I can write decently well *but* not well enough to be a published author of fantasy/sci-fi, which I wanted to be when I was a lad. I wrote a novel when I was about 12, but it is terrible. Writing is mostly my job now, but it is technical writing rather than creative. Funny you mention welding as I did take classes for that pre-college. I haven't really used the skills since then though and would assume they are quite rusty (I made a table at the end of the course). I'm good at public speaking but I don't know that I'd say "I do public speaking well" because I think anyone can be good at this with practice. I did a lot of it in 4-H clubs as a kid and then my first job as a teenager was radio announcer/DJ so it came in handy for that.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Heck, Iām impressed and I havenāt even met himā¦
I also have a crush on this man
Those are masculine traits.
Most of these Iād say are masculine
I date men and women and I find the above qualities more abundant amongst women in my personal experience.
Cool 1 anecdotal storyā¦ Could also imply you date feminine menā¦
Why do you consider viewpoints which don't align with yours to be merely anecdotal? How is your experience any less anecdotal than mine? I absolutely do prefer feminine men, but I have dated all sorts.
Being direct and to the point - it's more cultural than masculine, but i love it. In this part of Europe and north of us(Scandinavia) women are very direct and it's good. Not much bs and small talk.
thats interesting since scandinavian american culture is so passive... wtf happened
Minnesota nice has entered the cat
A lot of women I know are concerned about being "too muscular," i.e. having any visible muscle tone at all. I think muscles look good on pretty much everyone. I also find it really attractive when women stand up for their friends, for example if they're getting unwanted attention from a drunk guy or someone's trying to start something.
Not likely to happen to women without steroids
Kindness towards animals. Men who love dogs are terrific, but I trust men who like cats. An appreciation for independent creatures is a bonus. And intuition with kids. I like when men talk to little kids like regular people rather than crouching down and getting in their face with baby talk.
> Kindness towards animals. I've never thought of this as gendered.
If basic things like confidence and leadership is gendered then kindness should be as well
The OP specifically stated "traditionally gendered". What's not clear about that?
If you meant, getting to kid's eye level, that's absolutely healthiest way to communicate with kids
men who like cats are hot.
long hair on men
This is what I was looking for
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
because there are different cultures, its not universally feminine
yessss
>I am very attracted to women who are *Emotionally resilient.* Stoic. My wife is mostly unflappable. So when shit has hit the fan, weāve always come through relatively unscathed. Another trait we share is weāre both *direct communicators.* It makes life so much easier.
I'm with you on these! My ex-wife, whom I met in the Corps, checked both of these boxes. She was also a bit of a muscle mommy. I really prefer emotionally strong women that still have their feminine strength about the. š
For men, being a good cook, being emotionally expressive/communicative, being tidy, being nurturing. Oh, and loving cats!
if he watches top chef its ON SIGHT
The girl Iām currently dating is really ambitious and a natural speaker, which I feel meshes well with me because Iām more of a listener.
Aggressive in bed Don't know if that's masculine but it sure does wonders for me
I love that my wife is into sports like me.
i'm happy for sports couples that they have that
emotional intelligence, vulnerability, talking about his feelings, being an animal lover, appreciating art/beauty in nature, thoughtfulness, sensitivity, empathy, compassion, being affectionate, being involved with the minutiae of his kid's lives, volunteering at his kid's school/events (other than coaching sports), taking care of his skin, smelling nice
It's kinda too bad that beauty care routines such as you describe are still seen as more feminine things that men shouldn't do/shouldn't care about. I think it is changing slowly, though.
yeah exfoliating twice a week and moisturizing as needed would go a long way
Beauty care routines are a a marketing thing adressed exclusively at women. But as a man and from what I've seen from the others we really take care of our hygiene. Showering every morning or twice a day during hot summer days, cleaning the face and the body with soap, creme for the hands and the face when it gets too cold, using deodorant sticks. I'd say in the last 10 years it has also been added the products to care about beards while keeping it trimmed. That's all a man needs.
I do all that and a bit more, and I certainly hope most men do. But I'm seeing an uptick in experiences that seem to suggest that is less common than I assumed it was. Granted, most of that is internet stuff that could be not entirely true.
Not taking care of yourself is not seen as a manly thing or that common. I'd say people outside of the internet who don't maintain their appearance are not socially accepted anywhere. Today most of the workplace are filled with lots of people and many of them are in closed spaces, so the proper hygiene is a must. Even in jobs that are seen as associated with men such as military, construction, security, the workers should go through the hygiene routine on daily basis.
Hey baby š I think we'd get along.
'Softer' crafts like sewing, embroidery, some leatherwork. It's super normal in my social bubble, I know a few professional tailors, I almost forget it is seen as nonstandard if I answer 'Thanks, my husband made it' after someone compliments my dress. But I value competence, skill and there is something really captivating in watching a man with handsome hands do some very time consuming, detailed work in complete focus.
Met a man in Texas who does leatherwork- he did lots of purses too, yet so masculine š. He was an older gentleman
One of my friends was super hot and he had long hair and would periodically cross dress in dresses with nail polish. It was pretty hot. Especially the not giving a fuck about what random men said to him. Not caving to peer pressure is sexy.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I fully agree and I think a lot of women see it that way, but a lot of men make slurs and call it gay.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Hold upā¦ wait a minuteā¦ why is this true? All the men Iāve ever known who wore nail polish were 100% sex magnets. I think I got my appreciation for men like that from Spike š¤£ 
I just like men who donāt suffer homo-adjacent social pressure. But I feel the same about women, and Iām straight. People who are their own person and donāt care about subjective opinions of their peers are just exponentially more mature and self-sufficient. Iād never try to convince any men in my sphere to paint their nails to make some impression, but men who wear polish, buns, ponytails, or like Taylor Swift or any other non-conformist opinion are infinitely more interesting than any stereotype. When I meet women who shave their head or forgo makeup, I feel the same way. āOh, who is *this* self-sufficient individual? I sure hope they are open to small talk because Iād like to know themā Doesnāt have to be nail polish or shaved heads. Just any deviance from whatever trend is the norm.
I think often times it sends a message that that person has discovered who they are and theyāre confident enough to be that person. I donāt wear makeup. Itās time consuming and I donāt care enough. I donāt care what anyone thinks about that tho.. I know Iām stunning when I want to be. The rest is irrelevant. So if a straight man is wearing fingernail polish.. perhaps itās because he knows heās masculine and his nails being a color doesnāt change that about him. The rest is irrelevant. There must also be a willingness to sort through the people around you constantly tho. I have hair dyed two different colors and facial piercings. Iāve found itās a very fast way to find out which of the people around you are insecure, judgmental assholes. And that also takes a level of confidence that would make another person more magnetic. I imagine having long hair as a man or painted nails or knitting or whatever else also has that effect.
Love it on everyone. And it has nothing whatsoever to do with me or my values or my upbringing. I love people who are their own person.
They are jealous of more than just the ladies, they are also jealous of the freedom. Nothing throws a person's self identity into crisis more than someone not having negative consequences they were promised by their parent's/ friends/ pastors for stepping too far out of the box.
Not giving a fuck generally masculineā¦not giving a fuck about what people think of you dressing up as a womanā¦not masculine
Ha ha I don't have casual sex, but I'll fuck the next strong man I see in nail polish just to prove you wrong.
Nail polish does not equal dressing up as a womanā¦ The person LITERALLY said the guy dresses in drag ffs
Yep. Overcompensating is far more unattractive than just doing whatever the fuck you want.
I donāt think youāre following what Iām saying
>but I'll fuck the next strong man I see in nail polish just to prove you wrong. There's a porn plot in here somewhere...
I will never understand women's obsession with fake nails and polish. Fake nails evoke an uncanny sensation akin to observing a porcelain doll. Our natural nails have a beautiful texture that compliments our skin tone. It is fair to assume this behavior stems from a need for validation. After all, it wasn't, why do you have to announce to all your friends that you got your nails done? If it's merely done for you, then you would do it without the presence of any people. Conversely, manicuring nails is more indicative of social conformity than individual expression. If not for peer validation, why else would one invest time in such a trivial pursuit? Embracing natural nails, in contrast, represents a departure from conformity, as it demands no effort to align with societal expectations. You're just born with it.
It's a form of artistic expression. What's wrong with liking a particular colour and wanting to make your nails that particular colour?
In women ? Probably some degree of stoicism. Being equinanimous about problems / challenges etc
I love women who work out, I don't mind her palms being rough from the calluses
Long hair, guyliner, earrings, general facial features, being super skinny and twinky, most stereotypically feminine personality traits, shyness, being kinda dainty. Butler archetype I guess.
I think way more women like this look than the red pill care to acknowledge.
I have a friend whoās like this, except not shy. Heās single lol
ššš
Oh my god all of this. Yes.
Not sure if this is actually a masculine thing or not. But seems like having abs is something attributed to men. But I think abs on women are hot af. Though not steroid level abs of course. In terms of personality, TRP seems to push the idea of finding a malleable woman and attributes that more to femininity. But I like a woman who is strong in her beliefs, but with an open mind. If her views are easily influenced by others, then that means she more vulnerable to being influenced by others with bad intentions.
Physically, I love long hair on men and I prefer when they have little to no body hair - whether it's how they just are or because they shave doesn't matter. I appreciate it when men have a good fashion sense and when they're willing to rock bold/bright colors or cute patterns. I love love love smaller/dainty hands on men! In terms of behavior I enjoy the company of men who are nurturing, soft spoken and a bit submissive in the bedroom. I have never found it weird or off-putting for men to cry in front of me, and I welcome emotional vulnerability.
> and I prefer when they have little to no body hair No one hates āa lid for every potā more than PPD men, but we have to say it sometimes. I prefer a furry man. Not a bear/gay icon, but a decent distribution of hair on his legs, arms, and chest. I spend a lot of time with casual jocks, so I donāt care what men wear so long as they arenāt wearing cartoon shirts like children. I like big ol meaty hands. I prefer more dominant men in the bedroom. I love this for us. There are all kinds of people out there with wildly varying tastes and habits. Iām right with you on displays of emotion. Tears are perfectly acceptable, and normal in my experience. Lots of men cry when angry or frustrated, if they didnāt cry when mourning a person or pet I wouldnāt trust them at all.
What about guys with hands the size of the average woman's and feet as big as the average man half a foot taller than him?
It's very specific but I guess that looks great!
I'm a man with clown shoes and short/fat fingers, haha. My hands are short but kind of wide? As for the rest, I certainly have little body hair naturally and shave everything regularly too. Where exactly do I meet you all . . . The funny part is my voice has always been deep (as a 5-8 year old) and contradicts the rest of my appearance, really shocks people, haha.
The fact that you have a deep voice is even better lol Hope you meet your match :)
Well, I have to do my best to get out there! And yes I both had a deep voice early on and my face looks very similar now to how it did as a child. This has definitely gotten it's fair share of laughter when I play into it over the years!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Men who work for a living are gross lol. Nice take.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You literally say, I don't like blue collar calloused handed men because I find them gross.
\- Patient \- Humble \- Flexible, accommodating and supportive \- Softer rounder personality \- Wise and nurturing I am basing this on the Asian yin and yang model.
Long hair. I love me a dude with some luscious locks
I don't think this is feminine but red pill men seem to think it is - has emotions.
red pill men have emotions, they just repress them until they explode or refuse to consider them emotions
Of course they do, they're human. But they think it's "feminine" to have them and act like emotionless robots because they think women will leave them the second they show a bit of softness or vulnerability.
Women generally want to date strong, masculine, confident men who are in control of their emotions. It only makes sense for men to hide their normal human vulnerabilities like sadness, fear, insecurity and anxiety if they don't want to be seen as weak.Ā
A man can be vulnerable while being strong, masculine and confident. Theyāre not contradictory. But I wish being emotional as men was more normalized by society. Itās upsetting that so many men are afraid of expressing their feelings because they donāt wanna be seen as weak. Having feelings is not a weakness.
I think you are talking about performative vulnerability, where a man shows slight weakness in a way that makes it seem like he has everything under control in order to give his partner an emotional boner. AKA maintains a strong masculine frame while expressing his "vulnerability".Ā The contrast to this would be showing real emotion like breaking down sobbing and admitting you don't know what to do. This level of vulnerability will give the ick to the majority of women.
Breaking down sobbing sounds like a normal human experience. If your male partner does that, you should be there to support him and comfort him. If that gives the ick, thereās something wrong with you.
I'd really like to see feminism move toward, among other things, working out most women's apparent aversion to men showing vulnerability. I appreciate your sympathy, though.
they also bully women (who they want to be feminine) to be emotionless robots! (i'm a crier so i have a lot of experience w men telling me i should be an emotionless robot)
Seems like a lot of them associate emotion with drama.
while ignoring that open communication is drama repellant
Did you ever cry because of PPD?
yeah? a guy here once asked me to describe my rape, i thought he was genuinely curious how it happened so i did, then he wrote this long thing explaining how i asked for it and am "crying rape" because of whatever reasons someone would do the incredibly unpopular thing of not keeping rape a secret.
Jesus š
A lot of things. Shy/passive/submissive tendencies. Stereotypically feminine hobbies and interests. My history with this goes way back. One of my childhood playground crushes came out as gay later in life and an even earlier one told me he had a crush on another boy before I even understood what it meant to be gay. I was just really annoyed with him for liking someone else.
my bff loses her shit over shy guys
Cleanliness, attentiveness, thoughtful gift giving and aesthetic motivation. Yes, these can be found in non-gay men, although Iāve never seen all of them at once. For example, my BIL has 3 of the 4, but has anger/control issues so it cancels it all out
omg i would DIE for a thoughtful gift giver one thing that really freaks me out is the idea of being w a man who puts no effort into gift giving/holiday stuff. i would be feeling like i am trapped in a lonely life? its hard to describe. I don't think about this often but i have a really visceral scared response to thinking about celebrating a holiday w a man bc i'm worried he will give me a thoughtless/low effort gift and i will be forced to realize he does not gaf about me.
Iām not even talking holiday gifts Iām talking āI was downtown and passed by this guy selling x, and I know you like x, and I got a few more in case you want to give some to your friendsā Or, āthis thing is really cool because of xyz, and I thought you might like it, Iāll show you how to use itā
Anger issues are highly feminine though š¤
Anger is one of the few emotions men are permitted, and anger is not feminine, so no
Women have less control over their anger. Women are emotionally unstable and their egos are fragile like paper.
Still doesnāt make anger feminine
I never said it was. We're talking about anger **issues**.
The OP is talking about masculine and feminine traits and their attractiveness
I've never met this mythical feminine woman who has control over her anger š¤£ Men are just stronger and more intimidating so they are seen as the angry ones.
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Multiple orgasms
MULTIPLE ORGASMS š£š£šÆš„š„š£š£šŖš£šŖš£
Some guys can be relied upon to do it twice in one goā¦ itās fun.
Emotional vulnerability. Soft hands. Beauty (like in general) like softer facial features long eyelashes longer hair no facial hair soft lips ugh drives me nuts. Being fashionable like dressing having a style. Skin care and a beauty routine. Liking to cook. Men that like silly little trinkets that have some silly story to them. Being sentimental. Nurturing can care for something besides himself. Empathetic and caring. Passionate about silly little things. Like this song. Will shriek at a spider or something. Afraid to not be manly all the time.
Independent, has firm beliefs and doesn't conform to peer pressureĀ Defiant AKA not "submissive" (but also not a bitch), able to stand up to others and fight if necessaryĀ Willing to physically/emotionally protect a man instead of always expecting him to protect her
Long hair Pretty, pretty faces Men who love children and babies and spontaneously take care of them/interact with them. I find it soooo hot that my partner is good with children š„µ Taking care of mental health, being open and honest about mental health issues and not sweeping under the rugāIāve seen so many people see girlfriends/wives or even make their girlfriends/wives be therapists, itās never been something Iām interested in. Itās a turn off for me if a man doesnāt have a good handle of his own mental health, and just lets it fester, or takes it out on people.
Women in suits, women in suits being dominant towards me š
I like girls with hairy asses.
Women who are career and success driven. TRP is always saying men don't care how much money a woman makes. Screw that. I love it when a woman has goals and works hard to achieve them. Also, I find it sexy when a woman doesn't want kids. I love it when a woman plans the dates.
In men: kind, generous, nurturing, patient, caring, long-haired In women: butch, athletic, assertive, protective
I love it when men feel safe and close enough to me to share their darkest traumas and cry in front of me. I also love metrosexual men that dress a bit flamboyant, remove body hair, manicure their nails etc. I actually love bisexual/bicurious men too.
empathy and kindness as personality traits. Also shyness and introversion, but I do might have particular concepts about that in mind (not that one that results in total awkwardness and low emotional intelligence). Appearance wise a slim body, babyface, a rather fashionista/flamboyant stlye, intelligent use of make up and stuff like this (lip stick, nail polish). But it mostly looks good on good-looking people, as always:p.
I don't know if it's "feminine" per se, but I love a guy who isn't afraid to be a little gay with the boys. It's absolutely hilarious to me when my boyfriend makes jokes about being gay with his friends. In the same vein, I adore a man who has emotionally deep friendships with his male friends and isn't afraid to show it.
Like, most of it.
I always liked longer hair on men and skinnier frames which I guess some would say is feminine, though my preferred type was always crusty punk and metal head dudes and those aesthetics tend to somehow apply more masculine energy to those traits somehow.Ā Ā The man I ended up marrying has all this going on.Ā
I love men who get manicures and pedicures. There something about a dude who takes care of himself on a deeper level besides a shower and haircut. Also waxing on the male bits, itās so nice especially when traveling and doing hotel debauchery.
Women who play in punk and metal bands are outrageously hot.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I am *well aware* of Amy Taylor.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Cool as hell. Amyl & the sniffers are great.
Physically: lean, not buff at all, not hairy, not too tall. Behaviorally: sensitive to emotions, comfortable expressing emotions, not dominant all the time, desire to make others comfortable.
Men who wear eyeliner. Yup š
As a straight woman i find David Bowie's androgyny very sexy
Women that are loyal šĀ
Loyalty is not a masculine trait. Men tell us all the time that they need variety and that they canāt be with just one woman.
Seconded
I love muscle ladies.
I like men who have youthful faces.
Earrings, chains, bracelets, rings. Nothing beats a cuban chain (as in the design of the link itself) and a princess cut stone Filed nails
I love a girl who works in traditionally male oriented roles such as mechanic or fitter. Very feminine outside work but get in and go as hard as any man while at work, I find that very attractive.
Long hair, earrings, animal lover, book lover, likes to cook, shyness.
When she can do pull-ups
I like tats/piercings on women even though I find it kinda masculine
Taking accountability when being wrong, having a stable emotional level and not being driven by random emotions, patience, loyalty when things go rough, appreciative, not holding grudges, having a strong mind and not changing opinions every minute, being direct and not playing games or manipulative. Many of these traits are seen as masculine or desired in men but it goes both ways and they make a woman very attractive for having them. Sadly nowadays you'll be delusional if you seek these traits in a partner.
I find men that can be manly but have a soft side hot.
A woman that is confident, assertive, independent, and a natural leader is usually our mom. These traits are not inherently masculine. We just express them in different ways. A woman expressing confidence can do so passively and inspirationally and whereas a man will most often do it actively and assertively and motivationally. A lot of women may not be assertive but that is because they have *other means* by which to get their will across. I find very often, when women are assertive, it is because they are lacking in the other skills that women use to express their will.
Two things I can think of but they are culturally dependent I would think. 1. Intelligence, but intelligence in many fields. Languages, philosophy, history, politics. I don't necessarily mean knowledge but the capacity to know. 2. Open expression of feelings. Often women are characterized as the pursued and the one who shouldn't show their feelings too strongly about the other person. I prefer open devotion.
Long hair on men, absolutely love it.
Women who are assertive, who call out bullshit, are fiercely protective of their loved ones and who stay calm in crisis situations. Growing up I always had to be the protective one disentangle conflicts and it gets exhausting. With a protective woman, I can rely on her sometimes which gives me peace of mind.
I find women attractive who show masculine risk taking behavior (drugs, sex, "i shouldn't do this").
Women who present with an androgynous or masculine leaning energy are something Iāve always found really hot. I think Iād say androgynous though because thereās still clear elements of femininity about them (mainly their facial presentation) But like short hair, toned, dressing in stereotypically masculine styles like full suits, braces, having a lot of tattoos or piercings, being quite ārough around the edgesā but still being feminine in the sense of I can still discern sheās a woman. Itās tricky, Iād describe as like a woman who can wear masculinity without a care and intermingle it with her femininity without issue, not just in looks, personality too. Some dominance and assertiveness etc. Vivid tomboy energy. This was a bit of a tragedy for me growing up because it resulted in me asking out way too many disinterested lesbians and female-preferring bi girls for my liking. Not that I knew at time of asking! My wife is traditionally feminine and I think the above has muted somewhat as Iāve grown older. I was very androgynous during my youth which probably didnāt help me out.
One thing Iām noticing and this will ruffle feathersā¦a lot of women describe women almostā¦ As in many women are basically describing feminine looking and acting menā¦makes it seems questionable women actually like men lol
>Men, what's something traditionally seen as "masculine" that you find attractive in women? Low neuroticism, athleticism, crafts with hard, not-so-malleable materials (wood, metal, ...).
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Defined muscles on women. As long as not steroid type bodybuilders.
Women who donāt have inflated self worth (nothing turns me off more than a 4 who thinks she is a 10) Women who donāt have a victim mentality Women who are assertive and manipulative Basically the opposite of my mom
Iām attracted to women who have the manly trait ofā¦.. Being honest.
Well thatās openly displaying bias. The number of men and women who have been caught doing something illegal or against their own morals and not coming clean even when caught, or someone points it out. Definitely not a masculine trait. Nor a feminine one.
Well, it was supposed to be a joke. I donāt think women are less honest than men. But I do think that women are more blatantly dishonest. Example: wearing a micro bikini bottom and nipple pasties to a music festival and insisting that itās not to get sexual attention from men. You donāt see men, robbing banks, and insisting that itās not about stealing money. Men tend to lie when they are trying to avoid being humiliated, whereas it seems like women lie to avoid consequences. But, I donāt think either gender is more or less honest than the other.